Evening Star Newspaper, August 17, 1930, Page 88

Two Dumbells Out of Dubuque HEN the Kammerer children were asked their father's occu- pation, they replied “Kammerer the Grocer,” with no sense of humble admission. In their city, “Kammerer the Grocer” was the finest, most de luxe institution of its kind in town. Indeed, there were those who movid away to metropolises like New York and Chicago, who found it necessary to write back to Kammerer for certain delicacies such as exotic spices, fruits, that were obtainable nowhere else. “Kammerer the Grocer” was not just the corner tradesman catering to the green-and- tinned needs of a small neighborhood area. Kammerer's baking, delicatessen, vegetable, fruit, tinned and staples departments were as complicated and highly organized as any big business. The stamp of Kammerer was the insignia of a housewife’s ability to supply her family with the best. Aesop Kammerer, while he did not actually serve the trade, could be found on the premises . of the business from early morning until late at night. There were roomy if not particularly . luxurious offices on the rear of the second floor, and he could either be found there, or in close . and careful scrutiny of the needs of his various - departments. T NO time of the day, except the noon hour, was & customer, asking for the " head of the concern, likely to be told that he was out, or unavailable. Kammerer, who had built up this business almost single handed, never relaxed his hold when success came. * Nine and 10 hours a day, six days a week, he - gave it heart and body and soul importunings - of his wife and children to the contrary-not- . withstanding. “Aesop, just think, our children have been to Europe six times now in all. Don't you think it high time we were entitled to just one holi- day!'® “You're right, mother. That's what I'm planning. Next Summer we'll join the young ones and see the world.” o ’ “Father, you've been saying that for six -~ years, now.” - “I mean it this time, mother. High time we were beginning to get something out of it. Next year this time the business can spare me.” The children, high-spirited twins of 18, were also of a mind. ‘“FHonestly, dad, it's up to you and mother to come over with us next Summer. You two darlings make us look snide, being s0 home grown.” “Never you mind, children, your father and I are going to France and Italy with you next June. It's coming to us.” Aei finally, although as mother said, she didn't actually believe it until they were on - the boat, the Kammerer family, four strong, . did set sail for the European trip, which the older pair had been contemplating, planning, dreaming, for at least two-thirds of their mar- ried lives. ‘The youngsters, pampered in every form of travel and education, and to whom the voyage was an old story, set out upon this one in the - high spirit of the adventure of experience lead- ing innocence by the hand. ITHIN 24 hours after landing Aesop Kam- merer and his wife were being swung through Europe according to the dictates of their two high-handed, effervescent youngsters, who were determined on showing them “how it was done.” The results need not have been surprising, but they smote the parental Kammerers with something akin to humiliated dismay. The older pair who, according to all precepts and precedents, should have been having the time of their lives, found themselves overwhelmed with the most profound sense of inferiority it had ever been their ill fortune to even conceive. Accustomed in their home city each to posi- tlon of authority and social and business recog- nition, here they were, being led around by the noses, so to speak, by two youngsters who were versed in aspects of life of which they had never even heard. It was one thing to hear Amy and Robert - recite the expedition of their Summer travels, - year after year, when they relurned from the long and luxurious vacations afforded them by their stay-at-home parents. It was an- other matter to come face to face with these . wonders of European civilization; wonders to which their children were innured, and stand there, as Mother Kammerer floally admitted to 1. her husband, like twe dumbells out of Dubuque. ‘ny N Nl e 2 THE SUNDAY STAR, WASHINGTON, D. C, AUGUST 17, 19%. Mother and father suddenly realized that they weren’t having a abood time on their visit to Europe. But their two chil- dren went on gaily taking in one art g Tneir mutual admissions, kept hoarded from one another during the first six weeks of the trip, burst forth one night in their hotel room that ‘overlooked the Arno in Florence. “Aesop, you may not know it but we're a pair of what the children would call ‘dumbells out of Dubuque’.” He had been sitting beside the window, rest- ing his tired and aching feet upon a pillow when this outburst came, and he turned upon his wife the tired defeated eyes she had been noticing in him for weeks. “It’s terrible, mother. If I have to face an- other art gallery or another cathedral and pre- tend to those youngsters that I know what it’s all about, you'll about have to ship home my ashes in an urn.” “AND the degrading part of it is, Aesop, Amy and Robert love and understand those pictures and the beauty of the archi- tecture. There’s just no use my pretending, Aesop, I don’'t know a Del Sarto from a Raphael, and the worst of it is, I don't care. I'm tired, papa. My neck aches from galleries as much as your feet do.” “The beauty is there all right, mother, It's To Have ’Em Continued from Tenth Page “You're—you're mine. I'll go wherever you go. Nothing can separate us—-" “No?” inquired Madeline, coldly, venomously, “How about me?” Daphne’s laugh was derisive. Gerald moved away—his eyes on the vessel, which was about two miles off shore. A launch was being put off. Glorlous! It danced on the waves, mov- ing ever nearer. In a few minutes the launch had reached the lttle lagoon and two men were coming in. One of them was in the blue uniform of an officer. Third officer it said on his hat. And the other was a sailor, “Saw your flag,” said the tall, good-looking officer, “And picked you out with my glasses. How'd you get here?” “Shipwrecked. The Blenuria, six months ago,” said Gerald. “My name is Brattle, Ger- ald Brattle. I'm from Boston and——" Daphne and Madeline had come up. Gerald noted the look in their eyes as they stared at the neat-looking visitors, = “And,” he continued, “these girls were stranded with me. Miss Pollard, Miss Whitney.” “Charmed,” smiled the officer. “My name is Chauncey. , Third Officer Thomas Chauncey. And T'll he glad to take you off this island. Any time you say, Mr. er—Twattle.” Twattle! Gerald felt as if he had been stabbed to the heart! It was here again. The first sign of that—that old inferiority business. He glared at the officer—who missed it because he was staring in frank admiration at the girls. And they? “Oh, it's wonderful of you to comé!” mur- mured Madeline. “I—I feel so—so embar- rassed, being seen—this way——" “You look charming—stunning!” replied the officer. - “Oh, you can’t mean that!” giggled Madeline, her eyes smiling into his, “Well,” coughed Gerald, “we can be starting now any time » “Just think, I can see New York again!” cried Daphne. “Old New York. Oh, I could “New York, hah!” interrupted the officer. “Well, well. We could see that together. I hit New York quite often.” (;:uu) backed away a little, plucking at his frayed shirt. This thing was going all wrong. He was scared and hurt, TAR s wEW OTasn L Pre ) Lo just that we haven’t had the time to prepare ourselves to admire it, the way the children have. The whole world's not cragy, traveling these countries over for the wonders of their art and beauty. It's just that we Kammerers the Grocers haven't had time to become any- thing else.” “There’s something in that, Father,” said his wife, easing the back of her neck with a min- istering of witch hazel. “I long, just as much as you do, to be able to make the children feel we're up to it—but I may as well confess, Aesop, I don’t know what it’s all about. Take that lecture today in the gallery on Siennese art of the fifteenth century, it wasn't easy to follow what he was saying, father, the way it was for the children because they've had enough preparation for travel, to know what it was all about.” “Exactly, mother! While we've been at home, being grocers, our children have been preparing themselves to enjoy the things we will be outcasts from, all our lives, if we don’t hurry up and begin to lay the ground work for us to enjoy it, too.” “Now, what do you mean by that, Aesop?” asked his wife. to Hold ’Em. He glared at the sailorman. His anxious eyes noted a small gold button in the officer’s coat lapel. He drew nearer. By George, it was—it was the emblem of the Independent Order of Antelopes! He was a brother Antelope, this far-too-handsome officer. Gerald’s brain was busy. Very busy. He pushed himself into the center of the little group. “Daph,” he said, “and Mad—will you go to the hut and collect our stuff? I'll be mak- ing arrangements with our friend.” Dappne laughed. “Oh, sure. Oh, this is wonderful, your coming, Mr. Chauncey!” ‘The two girls skipped gaily off to the hut. Gerald turned to Officer Chauncey--and de- liberately gave the distress signal of the Ante- lopes! “Why, brother!” said the officer. “I'm sorry you're in distress. But everything’s ok. now. I'm taking you off and—" “Listen,” said Gerald, quickly, earnestly. “You're a brother Antelope. And you've acknowledged my signal, asking for help. And you're in duty bound by your oath to help me!” “You bet I will!” agreed the sallor. “An Antelope’s oath is sacred.” “Well,” said Gerald, in a low, hard voice. “I want you to get in that launch-—and re- turn to your ship! And forget you ever saw this place—or us!” “But——" stared the officer. Gerald’s heart was in his voice. “I'm not crazy. I'm perfectly sane—and I've only got a second or two to explain. I was just a big, fat zero—back there in the U. S. A, Under- stand? Nobody ever ‘looked at me—-paid any attention to me. Especially—girls. While here! He motioned over the knoll. The keen eyes of Officer Chauncey showed he understood. He hesitated a brief instant. Then held out his hand, grinning. “Darned if I blame you,” he laughed. I'll do it. Yes, brother, I'll do it.” “Thanks,” said Gerald. ‘The officer turned, gave an order to his man. The two got into the launth and the sailor started the engine. “Good-by, Brother Trattle,” called the of- ficer. “And good luck!” The boat receded. Mr. Gerald Brattle of Boston knew he was in for it. Softly, mechanically, he reached down and picked up & club from the beach. (Copyright, 1930.) “And RER T O 300 k) ery after another until— an awful frost, Amy. Good known the governor and the lady were going to be a pair of saw~ our hands! Did you see the mater flop down for a cat-nap today of Livia, right in front of the rals?” A ‘es, and it would have to be'in front of ‘Io Guarded by Argus’ I wouldn't say it to the dears for worlds, but can you imagine how they would welcome taking an earlier hoat home? We could hop down to Antibes then for a couple of months on the Riviera.” “I'll be the last to suggest it to them.” “Leave it to me, darling, I know the mother like a book. She will jump at the release!” I'l'mnthhpolntuntAmpwukodln on his progeny, who were tossing off the remains of their cocktails. “Say, Rob, say, Amy, what say? Here in this envelope I've two t{ransportations back “Oh, Father—not quitting us, are you?” “No. You'ré quitting us. Ma and I have made up our minds to stay over in Europe this year and catch on to this thing called the culture game. I'm going fo need you two children back home. Rob, you're going to take charge, of the fruit and vegetable depart- ments, A to Z, and. Amy, I've wired back to our Miss Punt to take you on in her depart- ment and get you limbered up in the fasci- nating study of imported spices.” - “Why, Father——" “Nope. Your mother and I aren't going to need you around for the next little while. We're going to get ourselves ready, the way we did you, to know what it's all about.” And so it was, that the house of Aesop Kam- merer, fancy grocers, found itself presented with a new manager of the fruit and vegetable department as well as an assistant to Miss Punt in the fascinating department of rare and ex- otic spices. (Copyright, 1930.) Ticks and Dairy Products. T would seem, on the face of it, to be a long jump from cattle ticks to the banking busi- ness, but now and then a banker is farsighted enough to realize the potential importance to his bank of bringing about, so far as he is able, the eradication of ticks, which so seriously hamper the development of the cattle and dairy business in some sections of the South. For instance, not so long ago a bank in & Florida city carried advertisements in the local papers, in an educational campaign among the farmers, to bring them to a realization of the value to their herds in tick eradication. The advertisments were of the type of the following excerpt from one of them: “Many of the leading dairy and cheese inter- ests of the North and West have been estab- lishing plants throughout the South, thus help- ing to put the dairy industry on a safe and solid foundation, and to encourage the diversi- fication of agriculture, the raising of more and better live stock, and the production of mitk, cream, butter and cheese. . “The tick can be abolished, and, when it is accomplished, Florida will quickly attain high " rank as a producer of beef cattle and dairy products and a new stream of dollars will stream into the State.” S - R L R Y]