Evening Star Newspaper, December 9, 1923, Page 6

a PRESIDENT IS GUEST | AT ANNUAL DINNER OF GRIDIRON CLUB HERE (Continued from First Page.) special Invitations from the club to 3N the twenty living sons of Presi- dente. Of those unable to attend, tetters were read from Dr. Lyon Gardiner Tyler former Judge David . both of Hold- croft, Va.; i New Hamp of_Sun Diego, Ci Nauturally. the club could be de- pended upon to stress polities, presi- dentlal candidacies and all that sort of thing, and xkits ran through the evening's entertainment dealing with these subjects. Give Clever Skitw “The Pilgrims on Pennsylvania Avenue” was the title of a skit fur- wishing a vehicle for a play on presi- dential candidacies and the promi- nence of New Englanders In the ad- minfstration. The stage was set with a street sign marked “Pennsylvania Avenue” upon which entered a group of Pilgrims, tall hats. long closks, blunderbusses, and everything. The rgll was called, disclosing the pres- chce of Heny Cahot Lodge, Secretary Weeks, Frank Stearns. Willlam M. Butler, Frederick H. Gillett, Senator Moses ‘and Senator Brandegee, all of New England The psendo Senator Brandegee an- nounced: “We have been a long time in the political woods before landing in_Pennsylvania Avenue.” Secretary Weeks replied: “And now that we are here, let’s be & long time getting out.” Senator Moses' prototype We take possession of Pennsyly Avenu the name of Caiv ige, New England, the republican rty and four years w adding | U they were seeking e votes, the spoils of war—for Indians Break Out. Indian war whoops resounded in the dista “The progressives are off the reservation” was the startled ery and there was a demand for K- der John T. Adams, chalrman of the republican national committee. He entered in modern garb, explaining that he had to wear a “hands oft" dis- gulse until after the nomination. Asked to fight the progressives, he sald that scrateh the hide of a pro- sressive and ‘“‘you would find the tattoo mark of a republican” and he hoped to_placate them. “Is the President of the Capt. Coolidge, coming to with us how to keep Tennsylvania avenue? Mo colony, counsel ced Senator “Certainly not.” replied Todge. “He will remaln in th tive chamber so the coloni; know he never forsakes his dut a moment.” aves all the Becretary Weeks. “Of course. That is u major polic of the administration.” rest to us,” said t if we plan aright the policy of silence. It gives consent.” emp” on Hand. “That another major policy of the administration.” ‘But how are we to know we are proceeding as he wishes?" “Baxcom Slemp will is why he 1l us. That was appointed.” | “Slemp is another major policy of | | the administration.” “The waves of party the republicanism. Who on the troubled waters?' Who will pour the oil?" lemp.” said Senator Lodge. “Remember, we don't mean Teapot Dome oil. The Sinclair bfand's no g00d for troubled waters.” Secretary Slemp's double then ap- peared What detained you?" “Saying ‘no’ to congressmen." “That ought not to take very long."” “But it did. Every republican member had to be told the pie was ont before T joined the Pilgrims.” ““Where s the President of the col- dash_high on ot our pour ol New England on | Senator ‘understand | insurgency | rock-ribhed coast | will | | get cried: i The ‘witeh I |'PRESIDES AT DINNER Retiring president of the Gridiron Club. of nations.” the league in charge of was given you in g ati iteh shrieked Prixcilla on Stage. Priscilla rushed stage. he wore across her apron the legend 924 Nomination.” She e plained the Indians were chasing Secretary Weeks gallantly stepped forward to defend her. “It is not right that the fairest flower of the colony should be with- out the strong arm.of a man to de- fend her,” he sald. “You have found favor in the sight of the president of our colony, that peerless leader af the pilgrims, Capt. Coolidge—a man not of words, but of actions; one who {e versed in deeds and not a maker of phruses. He waal not speak for himself, so I epeak to= him." h downcast eyes. re- on't you speak for Then I have wooed vou Now my faith ix ain.” ust have time to think. There are so many. 1 onee thought Herbert Hamaur wanted me.” “He is the friend of our captain and one of his lfeutenants.” "And then there s Charles | Hughes." “Another friend and lieutenant Herbert and 1 Speaks of Lowden. “And T sometimes hear from Frank even a Franklin 1924 Christmas Savings Club CASH PRIZES The FRANKLIN award prizes in Club, as follow upon the: her. ! THE SUNDAY STAR, WASHINGTON, D. C, DECEMBER 9, 1923—PART 1. lr!ae. Capt. Coolidge will Have ap- pointed him a lHeutenant, too,” “That Giftord Pinchot 7 nsist- ent sultor.” “You'd P}uvfl a very dry time with cilla.’ vhile you are all the Indians threaten to carry me off. That Hi Johnson wants me." “Never that. We, who are vyour old sultors, would go down 1o poll 1 death if the progressives captured you. Until vou decide, Priscilla e to bestow your hund, we wili stitute your hodyguurd. to make certain, wt ast. “that you do not fall into that Indlan’'s hand: | “In the meantime, Priscilla, may we not carry back one word of hope to Capt. Coolldge?” “Why does he not come himself and [lukv the trouble to woo me? If 1 am not worth the woolng, I am surely not worth the winning. Surely {maia_worth courting must also be well worth the asking. ftranted Cal vin is silent, he must find words if he wants me. If he seeks e, let him usk; ‘till then, 1 answer silence with besleging | { i Second Skit Given, 1 Under the title of. Midsummer | Night's Seream™ another skit was pre- isented. depicting Miss Democracy and i Henry bank, | Ford, sltting upon a mossy “Where are the boys? crics Ford. Where is the where are the actors all? This ! Firestone? | stag wood's bewitched. . Oh, hum, my tires .W flat." 1 | i 180 Then came in Puck. who, address- ing Miss Democ put ‘the spell over her and invoked her to worship Ford. Then he wove it upon Ford, placing the donkey's mask over his head and conjuring him to: “See thou with a donkey's eye; Democracy personify: Make love to this foolish dame, Dream of presidential fame.” Ford awakening, uvers “The White Housc. the White House. T want to g0 there ever moic: { They do such things and they such things: I want to go there ever more.” i Then Miss Democracy awakes and both are powerfully disillusioned Take-Off on Hughex. | A take-off on the daily interviews of the newspaper correspondents with Secretary of State Hughes and having reference to some recent utterances of the Secretary of State, was put on. the Secretary of State being imper- sonated by a member of the club. The interlocutors and the “high say source of authority” conversed about | various foreign topics In true Gridiron Club veln. The “Gridiron Singing announced and President lasked that they be shown in i eWell. boys.” said the school tea fer, “I hope you have had vour thro properly lubricated. What siug tonight “Coming through the rye.’ pupil “That's a4 good suggestion; the | quartet will now sing a modern ver- | sion of an old song Tt ran: ‘When a fellow meets a fellow, In a manner sly, rher: For # drigk of rye In_these days of prohibition Dninking's on the sly And perhaps in some hip pockets You may find some rye hool” was Henning said a VATIONAL BANK will its 1924 Christmas Savings S: FIRST PRIZE ... | sistants in | annour ts | shall we ¥ <« a chance of something doing | “Soaring goes the cost of living, Prices are 80 high, That is why to every highball We have sald go0d-bye. But we glve you solemn warning, You don’t want to die, Better go and have it tested— uff that sells for rye.” Sverybody's going through the rye these days. What the farmers | want ix somebody coming through for | whemt.” [ "Why don’t the farmers strike?” es, and let Gifford Pinchot settle the strike. Then the farmers would 2 for wheat and the bukers | would get 15 cents for bread and the | public would get it in the neck. “Why don't the farmers see ldge about their wheat?" al “You're not on to the White House They had better see 001 o “Ile's the President's secratary. Coolidge knows the Senate and Siemp knows the House and so the White House has got Congress going and coming.” Slemp {sn't much of a talker, i No, but O boy, you ought to hear nim_listen. say he has to who goes to listen to the White and if they don't listen good th ix nothing doing.” You have to see Bascom Slemp ach day or you can't see Coolidge | at_all’ So, having grilled Mr. sang @ nice song to hi Notables Present. Everybody sitting around the Grid- fron tables likes to see in the flesh the prominent guests from home and afur, and it is the custom to provide a vehicle to get them to their feet. | Last night it wae announced that Dr. : o, the discoverer of 5copo- r known the truth was present, and would in- oculate some of the distingulshed per- nt, wnd have them “tell the the influence of the > “Dr. House™ and his as- the clinic came in. One after another of guests were called unon to arise, and after having osten- sibly been given a shot of the drug assistants reported on its ef- lemp. they | re was Oscar Underwood, for instance, of whom the assistant had asked what he thinks of the opposi- tion to his presidential candidacy by a certain distinguished democrat now domiciled in Florida, Willlam J. Bryan. am sorry, doctor.” reported the sistant, “but the rule of the Grid- iron Club that ladies are always pres- ent makes It inadvisable for me to Senator Underwood's re- ply." Ahen of (3 1. Brennan,. the democratic " of Tlinois, it was 4 stused (o tuke the it was un- r to ask a man such as he “to tell truth in this place Refuses to Take Serum. Speaker Machold of the New York ssembly was to have baen asked if fie is 1o be a candidate for governor, but refused to take the serum “be- cause of a weak heart’ “Has Speaker Machold a weak if he told the v of the Navy nth Page) At. Yernon s. Sabvings Bank Christmas Have a Full Purse - Next Christmas When the time comes to play Santa Claus, it’s pretty hard to have to count pennies and forego the pleasure of open-handed generosity, all for lack of a little ready money. And it’s no fun to be paying off Christmas bills the rest of the winter, either. Make up vour mind that next Christmas you're going to have one of our Christmas Club checks early in December, a fine lump sum to spend just as vou please. . You can adopt any of these easy plans of weekly saving, and vou’ll never miss the small separate amounts at all. SECOND PRIZE .. THIRD PRIZE Three Prizes $50.00 each Twenty-five $10.00 each These prizes to be given to completed memberships in our 1924 Christmas Savings Club sub. mitting the best ldea, slogan or essay, in not over fifty words, on the subject of Thrift. What the best way to sa Can one do better than open a savings account in his favorite bank and add to it every week? All papers to be submitted not later than November 15. 1924. Three direct the contest and declare the winners. Let all compete! A single good beat an essay. FOUR CLASSES OF MEMBERSHIPS 50c—'1:0—52.00_$5.0 Weekly Each 50c Membership Entitles You to One Idea (A $1.00 membership has two essays, $5.00 membership ten) Club Opened December 8th— Closes January 19th JOIN WITH US—EARN A PRIZE—HAVE A CHECK FOR CHRISTMAS CLUB OPEN AT BOTH BANKS—Information and further details cheerfully given at either of our banks. Bank Open Saturday Evenings, 5:30 to 8 THE FRANKLIN NATIONAL BANK JOHN B. COCHRAN, President. THOS. P. HICKMAN, Vice Pres. and Cashier Penna. Ave. at 10th St. N.W. Branch—Conn. Ave. Near L ony. Capt. Coolidge?” “ie is back there going over the 1ist of republican senators who were defeated in 1822, Looking for more ambassado “He, is very come home, isn't h “Yes. he hates nofse.” Then the Indfans in full war pano- ply stalked upon the stage. Firat Was “Big Chief Magnus Johnson.” | who wanted to kn Does any one here speak Swedist s assured by r. Slemp” that he could speak all congressional dfalects and that Magnus was no worse than man Magnus de: v the warpath: mavbe the Great White Father would vet turn out to be a Pprogressive.” But Slemp assured him that “Calvin Coolidge will never join vour tribe; ie can't yell loud enough. Follette Appears. Big Chief La Follette came on. He was asked if he was leading the third party, and replied that he would lead any party that callsd him chief. Big Chief Bill Borah safd he was not on the warpath yet. He could see good aven in a Pilgrim and might help deal with the Indians. All that would ie nacessary would be to adopt his principles. “Big Chief Hiram John- spn avowed he “was alwavs on the warpath,” and invoked his fellow chiefs {o “come on, let's make our War medicine and come back and kill & Pilgrim.” Elder James E. Watson appeared dragging a witch whom he had found prowling in the woods. She was the apirit of the world court and avowed: J_make spelis and incantations; I'li sorry Col. Harvey has unblased judges will word or slogan may Join one of these clubs now! The Even Amount Clubs 50 WEEKS T T T T T T T Jow week week week s week week week week 25¢ 50¢ $1.00 $2.00 $5.00 $10.00 £20.00 . $25.00 $50.00 $100.00 $250.00 $500.00 1,000.00 - [ - I Amount The Decreasing Amount Club $2.50 the first week, decreas- ing 5¢ each week. $5.00 the first week, de- creasing 10c each week ... The Increasing Clubs Nex? Nlow Christmas o WEID Make This "1 I il a Musical Xmas! mernsis $63.75 If you want to bring real joy on Christmas morning i to the family, purchase a Milton or Mansfield Piano, $127 50 or Player! These are instruments with the outstanding = Interest will be paid on all accounts where payments are made regularly. tone qualities and beauty in finish and workmanship. . MT. VERNON See and hear the Milton or Mansfield tomorrow. - Savings Bank (Bench and Music Rolls Free) N.E.Cor: 9 St., 1. and Mass.Ave MILTON PIANOS Opposite the Patblic Library Next - $63.75 $127.50 We Carry a Full Line of FOUNTAIN PENS, PEN- CILS AND SETS of the following makes Waterman Parker Conklin Swan and Eversharp D. J. Hughes National Theater Bldg. Expert Pen Repairing 5c the first w;eek, 5c¢ each week. 10c the first week, increas- ing 10c each week Pimos $400 Puyens $575 Grands $635 Mansfield Grands, $1150 McHUGH & LAWSON 1222 G Street N. W.