Evening Star Newspaper, June 7, 1929, Page 31

MONEY FOR NOTHING By P. G. Wodehouse (Coprright, 1029, 7 North gmerican | to | '] and ' Sow o e “rich Amerie | ter Carmods. burglary "to expla 1 heirlooms inta cash. i & e IS e the disappea: in that he wants 1 on » pre s Wyvern. who refects it. tein _(Continued From Yesterday's Star.) | under him. THE EVENING STAR, WASHINGTON, D. C, FRIDAY, JUNE 7.‘ 1929. “A fellow called Twist.” “Twist?"” “Yes, Twist.” “Why?" 've been chasing him.” hasing Twist?” ves. I caught him burgling house.’ “They had been walking along, and (now reached a spot where the light, freed from overhanging branches, was stronger. Mr. Fish became aware that his X(rlend had sustained injuries. e R he said, “you've hurt your ead | | Hugo, feeling a little more benevolent | after three cigarettes, reached down and seraiched Emily's head, the Iatter | ; A R P00l she sald |2 hand to his wound, took it away again, Hugo startled. Was it some sound. ;‘"’.‘."n“;“',‘;v:'; S ieding ome steaithy foolatep. that Iad CAUSEd | -yes Gleeding. ~oud better g In into_the night. and have it seen to. “Fat head!" said Emily. “Can't even ‘¥e." Hugo reflected. pull somebody out of a bush.” b fix it. She laughed mirthlessly, and Hug& “-v’vfia‘« 'r»m"g,} cow. w keenly on the alert, rose from 4 ? o Teat and ganed this way and that, And | .One of the cows. I forget its name. then, moving softly away from him at | .. Where do we find this John® . the end of the path, he saw a dark “Hes in his room over th_el stables.’ figure. | g;n you walfi it all right? ' c the| “Oh, ves: rather.” mi',’,"L’}”.’Ve.fl,;‘,"'wx{{,"’."‘,.’.’,,",f‘,.‘,{’,‘.;. R@ Ronnie, relieved, lighted a cigarette. dashed along the path. And he had| “I say, Hugo, have you been having a not gone half a dosen feet when the | few drinks or anything?" seemed suddenly to give way| . What do you mean? i ohiite! “Well, buzzing about the place after non-existent burglars “They weren't non-existent. I tell you I eaught this Tw P “How do yeu know it was Twist?"” “I've met him." “Who? Twist?" “Where?" “I'll go and He once put This path, as he should have remem- | bered, knowing the terrain as he did, | was a terrace path set high above the shrubberies below. It was a simple| enough matter to negotiate it in day- light and at a gentle stroll, but to race successfully along it in the dark re- quired a Blondin. Hugo's third stride the | the stable yard with much concern. He hated to think of good old Hugo get- ting into a mental state like this, though. of course, it Avas only what you could | expect if & man lived in the country | all the time. He was still brooding when | he heard footsteps behind him looked round and saw Mr. Lester Car- | mody approaching. Mr. Carmody was in a condition that lin_a slimmer man might have been | | called fluttering. He. like John. had | | absented himself from the festivities , in the village, wishing to be on the spot when Mr. Twist made his entry into | the house. He had seen Chimp get' through the dining-rom window and | had instantly made his way to the front | hall, proposing to wait there and see | | the precious suitcase duly deposited in | the cupboard under the stairs. He had waited, but no Chimp had Epelr!d.' And then there had come to his ears | barkings and shoutings and uproar in | the night. Mr. Carmody. like Othello, | was perplexed in the extreme. |~ “Ah, Carmody,” said Mr. Fish. He waved a kindly cigarette-holder | | at his host. The latter regarded him | with tense apprehension. Was his guest | about to announce that Mr. Twist, | caught in the act, was now under lock | and key? For some reason or other, it was plain, Hugo and this unspeakable friend of his had returned at an un- expectedly early hour from the village, | and Mr. Carmody feared the worst. | | "I've got a bit of bad news for you | carmody.” said Mr. Fish. “Brace up, my | dear fellow.” | Mr. Carmody gulped. | “What—what—what . ., . “Poor old Hugo. Gone clean off his mental_axis.” | | | took him well into the abyss. He “He runs a place called Healthward “What! What do you mean?* | “I found him just now running round in circles and dashing his head against trees, He said he was chasing a burg- | Jar, Of course, there wasn't_anything | of the sort on the premises. For, mark and | this, my dear Carmody: According to | saw vou his statement, which I earefully check- ed, the burglar was a most respectable | fellow named Twist, who runs a sort of health place near here. You know him, T believe?" said hely.” ell, would & man in that position | go_about burgling houses? Pure de- lusion, of course.” Mr. Carmody breathed a deep’ sigh. Relief had made him feel a little faint. “Undoubtedly,” he said. “Hugo was always weak-minded from a boy.” Mr. Carmody. Penn. Ave. “By the wav” said Mr. Fish, “@id | house was full of interfering young | - “Den't mention 1t, Carm you, by any chance, get up at 3 i tne morning the other day and climb a ladder to look for swallows' nests?” ‘Certainly net.” “I thought as much. Hugo said he Delusion again. The whole truth of the matter is, my dear Car- mody, living In the country has begun to soften poor old Hugo's brain. You must act swiftly. You don’t want a gibbering nephew ‘about the place. Take my tip and send him away to London at_the earliest possible moment.” It was rare for Lester Carmody fo | diately,” sald Mr. Carmody. feel gratitude for the advice this voung | man”gave him so freely, but he was grateful now. He perceived clearly that a venture like the one on which he and his colleagues had embarked should never have been undertaken while the men. Such was his emotion that. for an instant, he almost liked Mr. Fish. “Hugo wasa saying that you wished him to hecome your partner in some commercial enterprise.” he said “A night elub. The Hot Spot. Situ- ated just off Bond Street, in the heart of London's pleasure-seeking area.” “You were going to give him a half- share for five hundred pounds, I believe?™ “Pive hundred was the figure.” “He all have the cheque imme- “T will write It now. And tomorrow you shall take him to London. The best trains are in the morning. I quite agree with you about his mental eondition. I am very much obliged to you for drawing it {o my notice.” Mr. Pish graciously. “Only too glad, my dear fellow. Always & pleasure, al- ways a pleasure.” WE CLEAN BLANKETS And absolutely guarantee agaimst ary ' shrinkage “EXQUISITE DRY CLEANING Corner 11th & H Sts. NW. Phone National 2704 The Crest of the Waves Swat the Fly Take advantage of an early start by an aggres- sive war on the fly at the beginning of the season. The Star has for free distribution wire-handle fly swatters. Ask for one at the main office of The Star, 11th and Pa. Ave. N.W. $15 —Like everything else, there are fashions in waves—and the “Evera” is. the highest wave in the Fashion spotlight for Summer. Evera has reached the pinnacle of rfection, and our eauty specialists will be glad to prove it to you. —The Evera Wave machine is the smallest and most convenient rmanent wave machine—weighs this the For That Graduation. Gift— EIGHTEENTH INSTALLMENT. MOMENT later Hugo came through the window. ~Hia| conghing fit had spent itself he was now in good voice again. | He was shouting. At once Emily became hersell again. All her sporting blood stirred in answer 10 these ahouts. She forgot her agony. | Her sense of grievance left her. Recog- nizing Hugo, she saw all things clearly | and realized in a flash that here was the burglar for whom she had been waiting ever since her conversation with that wire-haired terrier over at Webleigh Manor . clutched out desperately, grasped only | Ho near here John had taken her to lunch there | cool Worcestershire night air, and then,| “What's Healthward Ho>" one day and, fraternizing with the Web- | 1olling down the slope, struck his head | “It's a piace where fellows go to g=t Jeigh dog. she had immediately noticed | with great violence against a tree. | fit. My uncle was there.” in his manner something aloof and | When the sparks had cleared away| =~ “And Twist runs it?” distinetly patronizing. It had then |and the firework exhibition was over, he| = «Yes" coms out in conversation that they | rose painfully. e N had had & burglary at the Manor. and | A violence was speaking from abdve— | pillar of society was burgling the wire-haired terrier, according to | the voice of Ronald Overbury Fish | house?” his own story, had been the hero. He | “Hullo!" said the voice. “What's| “wnoo Twist?” spoke with an ill-assumed offhanded- | up?” Ll ness” of barking and bitings and | Weighed down by the burden of his| .yye)l where is he, then?” chasings in the night, and, though he |many sorrows, Ronnie Fish had come| .r'gon know ? | did not say it in so y words. gave to this path to be alone. Solitude was| g CORY RROR Lot o Emily plainly to understand that it|what he desired. and solitude was what |, old sa nnie gently. ook an unusual dog to grapple with | he supposed he had got until, abruptly, | T think you'd better be pushing along such a aituation. and that, in a similar | without any warning but a wild shout, | "“fl getting that bulb of yours re- e ahe "Wolid inevitably be found |the companion of his school and uni- ( PAlred wanting. Every since that day she had béen longing for a chance to show her mettle, and now it had come. Calling instruetions in & high voice. she raced for the bushes into which Chimp had | disappeared. Hugo, a bad third, brought the rear. U himp, meanwhile, had been com- bining with awift movement some very | rapid thinking. Fortune had been with him in the first moments of this dash ‘for safety, but now. he consid- | ered, it had abandoned him. and he must trust to his native intelligence | to see him through. He had not an- tieipated dogs. Dogs altered the whole complexion of the affair. To a go-as- you please race across country with Hugo he would have trusted himseif, but. Huge in collaboration with a dog was another matter. He looked about him for some shelter from this canine and human storm. _ And Fortune, changing sides again, smiled uj him once more. Emily, who had mn coming nicely. attempted very injudiciously at this moment to| take a short cut and became involved in & bush. And Chimp, accelerating an always active brain, perceived a way | out. There was a low stone wall im- mediately in front of him, and beyond it, he saw the dull gleam of water. It was not an ideal haven, but he wes in ne position to pick and choose. The interior of the tank from which | the gardeners drew ammunition for thelr watering cans had. for one who from childhood had always disliked bathing, & singularly repellent air. Those dark, oily-looking depths suggested the presence of frogs, newts and other slimy things that work their way down a man's back and behave clammily around his spine. But it was most cer- tainly s place of refuge. He looked over his shoulder. An agi- tated erackling of branches announced that Emily had not yet worked clear, and Hugo had l&?lr!nfly stopped to render first aid. th & silent shudder, Chimp stepped into the tank and, low: himsel | | | | | 1f into the depths, nestled behind a water lily. ding the task of extri- e hrare Sifeult than he had ated. e bush was one of those thorny, adhesive bushes, and it twisted itself lovingly in Emily's hair. Bad feeling began to rise, and the conver- sation wo{ on an aerimonious tone. “Stand still !'”‘ lrdu'l‘d Hugo. “Stand still, you blighter dog.” Puy:h retorted Emily. “Push, I tell vou! Push, not pull. Den't you realize that all the while we're wasting time here that fellow's getting away?” “Don't wriggle, confound you. How | can 1 get you out, if you kesp wrig- i U8 e a lift in an upward direction. | No, that's no good. Stop pushing and pull, Pull. Pull. I tell you. Rush, Now, when I say to you * Something gav Hugo staggered back. Emily sprang from his grasp. The chase was on again But now all the zest had gone out of it, The operations in the bush had occupied only a bare couple of min- Titas, but they had been enough to al- Jovs gae quarry to vanish. He had com- N'Q isappeared. Hugo sitting on the "X 1l of the tank and trying to re- cover % darte: ently even Emily gave the thing up. She came back to where Hugo sat, her tongue lolling. and disgust written all over her expressive features. There was a silence. Emily thought it was ail 's fault, Hugo thought it was A stifiness had crept into en Bunions and Tender Joints Gives Instant Relief Dr. Scholl's Zino-pads for Bunions stop pain_ instantly, protect the enlarged joint from pressure of shoe, and soothe and heal the ir- ritation. Thin, mildly medica e World Many motorists think oil is oil, until they get acquainted with Auto- crat Motor Oil. Then they appreciate the dif- ference. Nothing is more important than therough lubrication. AUTOCRAT-—THE OIL THAT IS DIFFERENT FROM ALL OTHERS Beware of Substitutes. He remained gazing after his friend as he disappeared in the direction of B Are versity days had suddenly dashed out from ‘empty space and apparently at- tempted to commit suicide. Ronnie was surprised. Naturally no fellow likes get- ting the bird at & village concert, but | Hugo, he considered, in trying to kill | ¥ himself was adopting extreme measures He _peered down, going s far in his emotion as to remove the cigarette | Tholder from his mouth. “What's up?” he asked again. plliEo was struggling dasedly up the ank. “Was that you, Ronnie?" “Was what me?" “That. “Which?” Hugo approached the matter from another le. d y see any one?” weather? NE day 95° “Just now. I thought I saw some one on the path. 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