Evening Star Newspaper, December 25, 1921, Page 38

A T IG E R H I LT%—Anétker‘ Fascina{i;zg Storfy——Byj H. Bedford-J o' OPTIT stood on the deck of a red-and-gold, silk-curtained river boat lent him for the trip and gazed out over the _most fertile and thickly-crowded plain in the world—that of the Min- river below Chengtu.. He was a Yankee. a palpable Yankee, long :and loose- Jointed and earnest, with a twinkle lurking in his eye which bespoke many unguessed possibilitics in that fertile brain of his. Toptit was on a dangerous errand. He was undoubtedly being trailed by yellow-skinned hands, and he had a half-healed knife wound upder his left arm. But all he thought of as he gazed. over this historic plain, over the sweet tree-lined river, with its gorgeous pleasure craft and its crowded trading junks, was of a suit- able rhyme for “Chengtu.”” Need- less to add, he found none. Toptit was a poet. You shall not be bored with examples of his art. Suffice it to say that he made known! everywhere that he was a poet. This was good for business, and he was in China on business only, and was con- ducting It along original lines. Chi- nese gentlemen have no particular re- gard for dealers and agents who seek antiques , old rugs, or fake Han bronzes, but they have an unqualified respect for poets, whose nature they understand thoroughl Toptit was in the enviable position of making poetry p: At the present moment Toptit was traveling down-river search of a certain object taken from the grave of Ling Ti, an emperor of the Eastern Han dynasty. Toptit had left his partner, Jim Hanecy, back in Cheng- tu, and was wandering forth on his| own. “W- dering” is the correct word. He waus seeking the floating home of a river pawnbroker and pirate by the name of Kang Ho, who was in pos- session of a tiger hilt. Toptit had no idea what this tiger hilt was: he was operating on purely verbal informa- tion. Whatever it was, he wanted it. As an authentic possession of the Em- peror Ling Ti it was worth a fortune to any collector. R IS boatmen, who were quite reli- able, would locate the craft of Kang Ho and put him on board. After! that his fate was in his own hands. “At the best my fate is none too good. Business isn’t what it used to be,” reflected Toptitt with a sigh. after failing to find any rhyme for Cheng- tu. “The interior decorators back home have educated the public up to relish being faked. The real stuff i Zoing out of fashion. Fortunately, we always have markets with museums and collectors. 1 hope this Kang Ho cliap will appreciate poetry. I must have an ode to the river all ready to paralyze him with.” He set to work translating his verses into the local dialect, which, luckily. required no raymes at all. Toptit ignored the fact that agents of a rival dealer were after the tiger hilt; he also ignored the fact that the mandarin of the province was after it for himself, and after Toptit as well. Little things like these did not worry Toptit at all. About fifteen miles down the river from Chengtu his boatmen located Kang Ho. The trading junks, after the usual river custom, were all huddled to- gether, irrespective of the fact that the river was wide. Pleasure craft darted about here and there. Gentry of uncertain business, like Kang Ho, —went anywhere their houseboats could find enough water. It was not hard to locate Kang Ho, 1t would have becn hard not to locate him. His craft was a huge house- boat, almost a floating fortress. It ¢ by itself near a little promontory. Alongside it lay the official revenue cutter of the mandarin. Above the two craft hung a haze of black pow- der smoke, and muskets were bang- ing ga As Toptit's little barge drew near two revenue men were flung from the deck of the houseboat and the ofticial cutter withdrew. Toptit gazed curiously at the gi- gantic figure of Kang Ho, firing a musket after his late assailants. The riverman was a huge ruffian, nearly seven feet tall, and-built in propor- tion. What his face lacked in refine- ment it made up in force. Observing the approaching barge, Kang Ho bel- lowed to his men—a choice lot of scoundrels—and prepared to repel boarders anew. Toptit's head boat- man hesitated and came to him for orders. “Go ahead,” smile. % Kang Ho regarded the foreign devil with a scowling suspicion. Ten feet from the floating fortress Toptit or- dered his rowers to back water. He stood in the bow of his craft and started to paralyze Kang Ho with his river ode, which he recited fluently. said Toptit with a * %k * ¥ YO must not think Toptit crazy. Quite the contrary! Kang Ho learned a great deal from that ode, which Toptit had composed with cun- ning skill. He learned that his foreign devil was a poet, spdke the dialect fairly well, and was under the ban of the law besides. A powerful appeal in this last. The humor of it struck Kang Ho. The Chinese, and particularly the lower classes, have a strong and rather Rabelaisian sense of humor. Perceiving there was nothing to fear | from this foreign devil, feeling quite satisfied with his own recent exploit, and entertaining that fatal sense of curlosity which rules the primitive mind, Kang Ho laid aside his weapons and invited Toptit aboard. Toptit clambered over the rail of the houseboat and then told his boat- men to go home. They did so With- out delay. “I am honored,” said Kang Ho, in- , specting his visitor. “I am unworthy to entertain so distinguished a guest.” Toptit, who believed in politeness for a time, replied with the custom- ary phrases. About him were clus- tered the grinning rivermen, exchang- ing pleasantries and obviously look- —ing forward to his speedy decease. Toptit, however, remarked to Kang ‘Ho, with his most innocent manner, that so powerful & man deserved to lay. Presently I shall join you. If you would care to pass the time with a singsong girl, or—" Toptit blushed and said he preferred to be alone. Accordingly, Kang Ho led him to a cabin amidships, plainly that of the pirate himself. Here he left Toptit—and locked the door when he went out. So far everything looked perfectly open and clear-cut. Toptit found the room. arranged in barbarle splendor with looted goods. On a table, beside an opium outfit, lay an object of bronze, elegantly chased, in the shape of a tiger, and bearing a magnifi- cently coat laid on by two thousand years of earth action. Toptit picked it up, saw that it was a sword hilt, and realized that he held in his hand the tiger hilt of Ling Ti. He gazed at it in silent admiration. It resembled malachite rather than bronze, so richly had its long burial 1 i and pearl where the original bronze was -exposed; elsewhere a sheen of baffling hues—turquoise blue, rich greens, yellow and white mottlings. Sighing. Toptit laid down the tiger hilt. Another man might have thought the affair concluded, finished, save for the bargaining, the end in sight. Top- it knew better. The boat was massively built on the exterior, but the interior was a flimsy shell. As he lighted a cigarette and reclined on a corner divan, the Ameri- can could hear a musical instrument tinkling somewhere, with a woman's reedy voice rising thinly. From the chatacter of the song, which would have done much credit to the palmiest composer of Gomorrah, he judged that i ] \ exactly Sunday school vacation. The opium layout was richly made, and probably belonged, like the ladics, to Kang Ho. “All this is very illuminating if not precisely elevating,” thought Toptit. “If there is nothing better to do, I'd better make myself solid with the tall gentleman. A table held some fine mandarin’s paper, with brushes, water and ink slabs. Toptit sat down and inscribed his ode in flourished ideographs. He was not too sure of his writing, and he certainly was no remarkable calligh- rapher with anything above six- stroke characters. But he turned out a product that could be read. With a larger brush and blacker ink he made 'a prominent inscription to his friend and patron the heroic Kang Ho. This done, Toptit pinned the paper to a brocadé on the wall. He was still admiring the effect Wwhen the door opened and Kang Ho entered. The brawny pirate saw the paper and read the inscription. His face ex- panded in a grin of flattered egotism. “Even as a great mandarin, I am honored by the memorial of a poet.” he exclaimed. “Be seated, my friend! This is a lucky day. I believe that you have brought the luck of the five bats with you. Hai, offispring of tur- tles—hasten!” * k% % I:’« response to his bellow, two of the crew entered, bearing hot wine, cakes, tea and other light refresh- Kang Ho. “But there was some men- ble-cups of hot wine, then he took from the table the tiger hilt, and leered at Toptit. “I know about you,”" he said. “You are one of those foreign devils who go about looking for strange things of anclent times. Well, here is one of those things! I lent a man ten silver liang upon it, but he is dead and cannot claim it again. You have honored me with a great poem. Be pleased to accept this s]l‘sht gift from me.” o Toptit pocketed the bronze with fitting thanks. “This is gn auspicious day,” said Kank Ho. “But there was some men- tion of a rifle.” - - “Exactly,” returned Toptit. “I shall give you an excellent rifle if you will send a man to Cheng-tu when I re- turn. The poem is less than nothing. The rifle’]s a fitting gift”" “The poem is to the rifle as jade to bass stone,” said Kang Ho politely. I have a real rifle instead of an anclent! «Xava tha less. I shall ba pleased to musket. snarling words at his men and they At this Kang Ho threw two| have it.” Toptit reflected that with a poem vanished. Kang Ho could take a hint.| and a rifie he had accomplished what «“If 1t will please you to occupy mY | all the power of the mandarin could humble quarters, ehall be happy. " he told Toptit, “I}not have done. None the less, he had I must change thelan uneasy conviction that the end of Jocation of this poor boat without de- this matter was going to be otherwise’ Toptit reflected. -He bad- plainly the thwart. incrusted aerugo—a sheened | the ladies aboard the craft were not} teachers on| | than the beginning. And he was right. Toptit had an unforfunate knack of getting his business done in remark- ably short order—and there were usu- ally complications. It does not ways pay to hurry in China. People take things.for®granted. Kang Ho was just now taking something ‘very much for granted. There was no way of changing his mind, either, without provgking un- pleasant possibilities. “There is a man with whom I have said Kang Ho, after his twenty-fourth®cup of wine. “He is Ngig Po Tui, from the Yellow river, and he has no~builness on this river at all. So I shall make him eat gold, and you shall help me.” “To eat gold” does not obtain liter- ally, although many white men think it does, Toptit knew better. He per- celved ¥hat he was in for some throat- slitting. “I would suggest,” he said calmly, | 4 A o . enhanced its beauty. Here were red “that you remembber I have enemles."} lows. Kang Ho edged along the bank “An!" Kang Ho emptiest another | cup and grinned. “Enemies are sent to make life interesting for such men ‘as us, my friend. Come, let us go.” | He rose. Toptit sighed and #ofowed, {svit. After all, there was something | engaging about this giant ruffan of | the river. Besides, Toptit could not g0 back to Gheng-tu until Kang Ho! sent him. He had burned his bridges, and must takg the penalt ! “I_am a terrible coward,” he said, ‘plainllvoly. | “So am I” and Kang Ho poked him in the ribs with a jovial elbow. They left the cabin together. There was a sampan trailing at the ] stern of the craft, and into this Kang Ho dropped. He indicated that Toptit was to follow. - Toptit followed. He guessed that behind’ the seeming simplicity and | ease of this affair was a good, deal he did not yet understand. Also, he had his own miethod of doing things, and he had atsurprising way of ap- pearing most innocent when he was not. So he climbed intq, the stern of the sampan. Kang Ho waved adiew to his genial pirates at the rail above, then took a pair of oars amidships. An ordinary sampah is not managed; thus, but this was no ordinary sam-| pan—it was a boat stolen from some river steamer, cleverly disguised with straw—and Kang Ho was no ordi- nary pirate. A < T[OPTIT could see nothing of any enemy. Kang Ho's floating fort- ress had been moored to the bank be- neath some willows, and there was no other craft in the vicinity. Out in midstream a group of salt-junks were crowding each other like a string of silly sheep in a wide meadow. Kang Ho bent over his oars and grinned. On his head was now perched a coolle’s wide hat, and his, huge figure was covered by a coat of roughly plaited straw. Now he paused and vouchsafed “his guest some en- lightenment. “Ngig Po Tui is smuggling salt and opium from Chungking,” he stated. “He pays the mandarin at Cheung-tu; to protect his industry. Further, he sometimes takes commissions to” do certain business for the mandarin.” Toptit looked interested. Obviously, this good-humored giant of & pirate was nobody’s fool! Ngig, whoever 1 i | { i * k k% gratiated himself with the mandarin who was enjoying a bit of easy graft.| river for a space. Then, passing again, he completed his tardy information. “Ngig Po Tui is a son of many devils,” he announced. “It ig under- stood that if you are given passage to your ancestors somebddy at the ya- men will pay a thousand dollars. So Nglg Po Tui came to me and we agreed to divide the reward. Another five hundred -dollars was offered for the bronze object now in your pocket. You will understand that I am taking you and the bronze object to Ngig Po Tui, who offered immediate payment of my half of the reward on delivery.” “What the devil!” ejaculated Toptit. Kang Ho grinned at him with famil- iar assurance. He returned to the local dialect. “Then you and Ngig Po Tui are not enemies?” “He has not yet awaked to the fact,” said Kang Ho complacently. s he near here?” “Within a mile. Seeing us coming alone, he will suspect nothing. Leave it to me.” } | ) a prospect of much better pay ahead. "he had the bronze in ‘one pocket and #i i took a match from his pocket, struck | coolie lazily fishing in the stern, The f chanced upon a tide in the affairs of men which bade fair to run to his liking—more or less. Springing that poem with the inscription upon Kang' Ho had been a lucky stroke. A river pirate, however, even in China, does not throw up a chance at seveh hun- dred and fifty dollars unless thére is it It was not unlikely that Kang Ho intended to obliterate his river enemy. then to destroy Toptit and kill sev eral birds with one stome. - “The big rascal is letting me In for something sweef!” meditated the American, not altegether happily. “He thinks I'll be so grateful for the bronze that I'll be unsuspicious. Well, I won't!” He watched Kang Ho, but failed to detect anything but good-natured easa in the broad yellow countenance. There had been no queStion of weap- ons. This was a queer sort of raiding party, thought JToptit. At all events, an automatic pistol in another pocket —and the shore was not far away. Kang Ho sent the sampan swirling upstream, keeping close to the bank. Several times he paused to observe the drift, throwing in small bits of straw. Toptit ndticed that _there was a strong backwash along this bank, eddying upstream. f* % % % HEAD 'there showed a small prom ontory, heavily bushed ~with wil “WELL SAID, BUT ILL DONE,” 'ONDED KANG HO, CHUC- “I DO NOT COME ABOARD.” toward this point, making a gesture ich enjoined caution on his com- panion. Toptit watched the proceed- ings curiously, and just before the sampan came to the end of the prpm- ontory Kang Ho laid aside his oars. From the bow of the sampan the brawny yellow man lifted a small keg: This he placed in the water; it floated, nearly submerged. Kang Ho it and held it to the top of the keg.! There was a spluttering as a fuse caught. Ten, with 2 gentle shove, Kang Ho sent the keg away and took up his oars. A moment later the sampan was shooting out beyond the promon- tory. There broke into view, just around the bend of the willows, a small junk moored out from the bank—a junk with half-furled matting sail, eves and devil-chasers on the bow and a latter sent up a shrill yell at sight of the sampan, and the junk instantly erupted vellow figures. Sl Kang Ho laid on his, oars, thirty| feet distant, and surveyed the junk of Ngig Po Tui with an Insolent grin. ‘Toptit was uneasy, for weapons were much in evidence. Besides, Toptit had one eye ‘on that floating keg, which was slowly drifting down past the .sampan. He ywas gripping the edge| of the: boat nervously, and praying that Kang Ho had, made some trials with that fuse befote cutting it. “Hei, Ngig Po Tui!” The bellow of Kang Ho lifted across the water. “I have brought the foreign devil, as I promised, and with him the bjonze object. He does not understand our speech.” - One of those at the { junk’s rail made answer. The first alarm was rapidly quieting. “That is good, Kang Ho. Come aboard.” “Well said, but ill done,” responded Kang Ho, chuckling. “I do not come aboard. Meet me on the -bank with the mohey and the {oreign devil is yours. But bring only one man with you. Shoot the foreign devil as soon as you like—after the money is in my| hands!” “Very well,” came’ the response. Two sampans lay alongside the small junk. Into one of them dropped a man. Presently Ngig Po Tul fol- lowed . him, . bearing a bundle—which was evidently “silver-shoe” money.! the fellow was, had undoubtedly in-|Kang Ho, in the meantime, was lus-| consular protection. tily rowing past the junk toward the bank ahead. Toptit glanced around Kang Ho rowed steadily up thelfor the floating keg, but could per-|down the river toward his own.craft, ceive nothing of it. “NoW,” said Kang Ho to him, “ifj you have a weapon, be ready! And if you gre not a fool. you have not come on such an errand unarmed.” Toptit merely nodded assent. The, boat slid into the shore, which was gently sloping, lined withgbushes and small trees, and from its general lack 6t cultivation seemed to belong to some temple. . The sampan from the junk bearing Ngig Po Tul and sculled by his single follower was rapidly nearing the shore. Kang Ho stood erect, flung off| speed ahead, and his boys were jump- his wide hat and his-straw coat; and| ing to load the little brass gun in the lifted one arm In a magnificent ges-|bow used for salutes. The little gun ture, “Kang Ho strikes!” he bellowed,|even greater confusion upon observ- and the roar was drowned in a blast{ ing the rapid approach of the launch that rgcked him on his feet.. Toptit, though warned, was not pre-| called his No. 1 boy. pared. - The concussion of the explo- slon caught him as he was half ris- “Have him ing and knocked him flat in the boat.| drawn sboard.” The officer in charge of the patrol Dased, . half-stunned, he lay against I Jin a pile. {be an excellent subject for an epic jriver. nes. A pall of black powder smoke ‘from his arms hastily, but the consul took the floating keg mine overspread the|no heed. Clinging to a carved pro- river bank. Through this fog Toptit|jection beneath the painted eyes of aw the other sampgn'drifting in upon | the patrel launch was a senseless man them, Ngig and his companion strig- | whom the consul had recognized, and &ling up from the bottom of the craft into which they had been the. Georgian watched as his helms- flung. | man, laid the two boats alongside with Then Toptit was aware of the tower- [ nice precision. ‘Then, seeing that his ing figure of Kang Ho, its arm mov-boys were attending to Toptit, the ing swiftly. Two flashes.of 1ight sped | consul regarded the officer, who was from the hand of the giant. Knives! * ok ¥ % N Through the smoke pall Toptit ssw the dim shape of Ngig's junk slowly|lency,” responded the officer angrily.!people say that Elliott Woods has thir- settling at, the bows. N This entire affair passed with light- ning rapidity. The explosion‘was tol- lowed by an instant of dead silence. It was In this instant that Kang Ho flung his deadly knives. With the next second the sinking junk emitted | a pandemonium of yells and oaths. “My men wil be upon them in a moment!” exclaimed Kang Ho, proud- ly. Admiration of the man’s scheme flashed upon Toptit, who was rising. Before he could speak, something| dropped ‘about his neck and dragged at him. A wild and furious shout from Kang Ho showed that a second 0ose had fallen. Through the thin- ng smoke a horde of figures dashe rom the bushes and crowded upon the boat. They were the soldiers of the man-| darin.. Ngig Po Tui had arradged a| clever trap for the river pirate and also fpr the foreign devil in order to get the whole reward himself. Toptit perceivéd that he whuld be; murdered very nicely, and the Rlame would be laid upon river pirates— probably upon Kang Ho, who woul be executed for the crime. | % These provincial soldiers from the| mandarin’s yamen were not the ex cellent national army men, btt they| knew their business. Toptit saw the; great figure of Kang Ho totter and g0 down, overturning the boat, and sending the whole crowd of assailants As he himself went into the mud Toptit felt the knotted silk cord tighten about his throat, but he did not resist. He was already free-! ing himself. Standing knee-deep in the ooze, he calmly held the muzzle of his auto- matic against the taut cord and fired. If you think this an easy feat under | the best of circumstances, try it. Top-! tit's bullet cut the cord. His second ! and thid bullets dropped two of the, men above Kang Ho. The giant river | pirate came erect with a bellow. 4t this point the yamen’soidiers| opened fire. If they could not capture | they could Kill. | Toptit did not wait to see what hap- pened next. He shoved the automatic into his pocket, gently dropped’into the water, and went ‘away from there as long as breath would hold him un- der the' surface. | When he came up builets splashed his face. He gasped new air into his| lungs- and went down again. He| emerged to find himself a goodly dis- | tance from shore, where the powder | smoke still clung thickly, cloaking ' the scene. “ “This is very pleasant.” he reflected, turning on his back and letting him- | self float. “I seem to have dropped: into a private war in which torpedoes, | pirates, and soldier-bandits all take| largeshares. The only consolation is that I haveethe tiger hilt in my cket. This proves that I am not| dreaming. I think Kang Ho would i 1 peem, or at least an ode in the epic style.” 7 For ten minutes he swam hurriedly. | then & heartfeit curse broke from him. He percejved a small, swift craft bearfng down to pick him up,| &hd from the flags at the stern saw' that it was one of the patrol cutters under jurisdiction of the Chang-tu mandarin. - B « “A thousand dollars reward—strict. Iy sub rosa—for the forélgn devi murmured Toptit, philosophically. “That means they'll knock me on the head. take me in and collect the re- ward—and the newspapers will tell] how a promising young Amerlcll’\ was ! a victim of river pirates! Damnt 'This | is my finish, all right!” * ¥ X % = THE American consul at Chung- -% king was on his way up the river tp Cheng-tu to investigate the beets sugar industry. There was no beet- sugar industry there, so it would make an excellent subject for a spe- cial report which would fill many pages and keep the government print- ing office busy for a while. The consul sat beneatly the awning of his steam laurich apd watched the Something was always happen- ing_here—that was one beauty of the Chinese river life. Therg was no menotony. Since leaving’ Hsu-chow and starting up the Min to Gfeng-tu on the final two-hundred-mile lap, the consul had witnessed one mirder, two free-for-all fights and several other episodes.of like interest. Now, as he lighted his midafter- noon cheroot, he/descried- an unusual incident ahead, and ordered his ‘engi- neer to slow speed. The consul was not one of your careful sort who fear to make mfstakes and follow the line of least resistance. He was a pugna- cious Georgian, and had made his offi- cial district one place in the world where Americans had no need to call themselves British in order to get He gazed with growing intefest at the boat which was slowly floating and with a- word to his helmsman steered toward her. The boat, he saw, ‘was one of the government river patrol maintained g0 prevent salt smuggling from the mines near Chung-king, and she was in some manifest confu- sion. Most of her crew were congre- gated in the bow, where they were engaged in striking at some object just underneath the curving prow and out of their reach. 2 The consul picked up his binecu- lars and focused on this object. An instant later he was ordering full roared and the patrol boat leaped into fiying the American flag. Fhe consul l | ! l “There is & man in the water—a white man,” he said. boat leaped into the Bow. and. waved dancing with rage. 'GIG PO TUI and his oarsman never | served suavely. knew what struck them. They|were abo collapsed together, and their sampan|I am the cansul of America at Chun; gradually drifted out from shore.|king.” > ! Undoubtedly— ! speed ahead, which the engineer made i hide? i ished you in another minute!” | Hello! |thousand liang on his head—" I | “This is very fortunate,” he ob- “I perceive that yau to rescue my countryman. “He Ig not your countrymfn, excel- “He is a man of France—" “You are mistaken, I, know “him very well,” said the consul smiling. At this The officer changed counte-! nance.’ - “Very well, excellency:” he respond- ed, bowing. “Wersaw him floating in the river and came to his assistance. “Undoubtedly that was well don interrupted the consul, who could ke just as bland as any yellow man go- ing. “I shall report your zéal at the yamgn. You will be rewarded.” “A man of your excellency's posi- tion should not be troubled with drowned bodies,” said the officer. “If you will turn over the man to us, we will bring him to Cheng-tu with all due respect and—-" “He is not drowned, and he is a friend of mine,” said the consul. “The matter shall be duly reported at the | yamen, so say no more. My papers are at your disposal if you care to see them.” That is not needed; excellency before this The officer bowed and turned away th a shrug. The consul ordered full have seen your aste to obey. The launch had drifted in close to the east bank, where there were many shallows. Toptit, whose position under the bow of the patrol -boat had nearly drowned him, but had turned most of the blows aimed at him, opened his eyes to meet the consul's smile. “Hello!" he observed, sitting up. ‘Say, I've had a devil of a nightmare! | Where did you come from, old man? The consul ] * ¥ x ¥ FROM here to there." produced a flask. “Sit steady now till 1 fix you up a snifter; you need it. | What the deuce have you been doing, Toptit, to get the yamun after _wur: Those chaps would hate fin-! Toptit felt for his pocket, patted it and then relaxed with an expression of complete bliss. “Me? Nothing at all,” he said in an aggrieved tone. “I'ye just been tak- | ing an excursion to see the river. If that isn't—" i %A familiar voice, lifted in a bellaw’; from the receding bank, drew Toptit| hastily to his feet. He opserved the | figure of Kdng Ho excltedly waving | from the shore. He waved response and pointed in the direction of t“heng-l tu. The pirate waved in understand- | ing and vanished. i ‘Great Scott!" exclaimed the con—! sul. “What's all this wigwagging, Toptit? Who was that chap?’ “A friend of mine—name is~Kang: Ho." Toptit took the drink that was! proffered him, then paused before the | consul's lqok of incredulous conster- | nation. “Kang Ho? Man, you're crazy! It| can’t be the river pirate of that name | —the beggar with a reward of five| i | Toptit grinned suddenly. “See here, are you talking to me in an official capacity?” he demanded. “You bet 1 am! If you're tied up with that pirate, there's going to be trouble all up and down the line, my son!” Toptit swallowed his drink. “Well,” he said, “don’t you worry about it! That isn't any pirate. That's just a big overgrown kid who got me into a hell of a mess. He'll probably be up at’ Cheng-tu in the morning to get a present I promised | to give him. Il introduce yo | “I think,” observed the consul, re- garding him gravely, “that you're I¥ing, Toptit!” ~ Toptit chuckled. “Of course, I am.| Everybody lies to a consul. Of course, if you weren't in an official i capacity- - “Oh, 1 understand.” The consul dropped into a chair and produced | cigars. “Here—my boy is getting out some dry clothes now. Tell me while—" Toptit told his story. He told the exact truth and produced the bronze tiger hilt to prove his words. And| yet- - To this very day the consul afirms that Toptit is the most polished liar he ever met. (Copsright, 1921.) Measuring Sound _ ‘With Microscope ! {Who Filla Thi | tests; | has cut down the death rate of Con- i plete little ¢ity with a scientific labo- | unae i Vice Pre: {under the influence of Vice President | o o | he ‘had learned the profession of wood |Eawara Clark, bin 1885, irun of his'home and library, en- BROODS OVER THE U. S. CAPITOL LIKE MOTHER OVER ONLY CHILD Elliott Woods Finds Joy in His Work, and plenty of Work to Keep Him Joyful. DO not know how Eiliott Woods could be overworked unless he was hitched double with %} mule,” sald “Uncle Joe” Cannon in speaking of the architect of the®Capi- tol building, generally recognized as the “busiest man” in Washington. Some € teen distinct jobs, others count up fif- teen—but no one knows the truth, be- cause Elliott Woods does all things en- trusted to him well, without friction or flurry, keeping S0 cool and calm that no one really appreciates how much he is doing. Hé has been thirty-six years on the job, and came to it by accident. He loves the Capitol, and his greatest pleasure is in restoring its original grandeur, and simplicity which, in spots, have been disfigured through the years. While he has been superintendent and architect of the Capitol he has | | | ELLIOTT WOODS, rteen Jobs for Uncle Sam. had charge of $25,000.°000 in com- struction work, and never has $100 of that grand total been challenged as an iniproper appropriation. Edliott Woods is extremely versa- tile. He is Uncle Sam's bailder in the National Capital: he is a clever musician and composer; he is an all- round scientist. antedating the bu- reau of standards in many important he is custodian of a unique art collection of very great value; he | | | gress by original innovations for ven- | tilation he is extremely modest. He is managing director of a com- and sanitation—and withal | ratory, blacksmith shop, machine shop. carpentry and cabinet shop, electric shop, painters and glaziers, tinners and roofers. stone masons. | plumbers and gas fitters, jacks of all| trades. And, mark you, this manag- ing director is in a position where he lems all along the line, such as heat- | ing and ventilation,and sanitation. | Ellioti Woods came to Washington | Thomas A. Hendricks and Albert G. | Porter, Governor of Indiana. Back in kis home town of Terre Haute, Ind.. | ! | carver. and at the age of nineteen | was in Indianapolis, where he had; dene the ornamental carving for the then great opera house. He was a great favorite with the governor, and one evening chanced to drop in while the Vice President was making a call. * k k ¥ “Hendricks.” said Gov. Porter, “Here's a young man you'd better: take back to Washington with you” —and Woods came. The Vice Presi- dent didn’t have any idea what to do with him. but introduaed him to architect of the Capitol, as a “mechanical genius.” Clark asked Woods if he'd like to stay on with him. ard Woods stayed. Clark suggested that Woods take a{ look. at the northwest terrace then . being constructed. Pretty soon Woods | came back and expressed views. “You're right, young man,” said Mr. Clark. “now you go right back and take charge of that work.” That was and they worked together until death called Mr. Clark, in 1901, when Woods succeeded to his job, but not to his title. «All that I have been able to make of myself I owe to the interest that Mr. Clark took in me, a stranger, & young man he wanted to help suc- ceed,” said Mr. Woods, with feeling. He treated me as a son, gave me the couraged me. It was a rare thing for a man to do. He was a man with @ big heart and took an interest in a boy. That is how I got all o T certainly is an Odd_ statement to say that ‘the microscope: is better than the ear for measuring some sounds, but it is true. In determin-|ying in this world to his mnduct| 1 ing the pitch of very high potes it ‘has been ‘found that the ear cannot be depended on, and more than one investigator has therefore turned to the microscope for aid.s - Now,” sound is a phenomenon of vi- ‘bration, and the pitch of any musical note can be determined if the sound wave corresponding to it is in wny|his hel manner rendered measurable. One authority has solved the prob- lem in’this way: ~He covers a plate with a thin layer of a mixture of olive oil and stearine, the surface of ‘which is slightly ridged by rubbing it delicately with the finger. To a ‘high-pitched tuning fork a short hair is attached, and a similar hair is fastened to another vibrating body, such as' a rod, whose pitch is known. The ends of these hairs trail across the prepared plate as it is passed rap- idly over them, and thus mark upon its surface a ‘double series of wave lines corresponding to the perfods of ‘vibration of the fork and the rod. The microscope is then called into ‘action in order to compare the length ‘and depth of the waves, and thus de- ‘termine the musical pitch of the vi- ‘dbrating fork, with an accuracy not attainable by the ear alone. —_—— Acclaimed as the handsomest man in France, H. Hoffman of Paris, ‘weighs 210 pounds and has a walst fneasurement. of .sixty-six.inches. . ‘of my technical education. It is one of the biggest human stories any! one ever experienced. I owe every-| toward me.” 5 * % ¥ ¥ That is the way, that Elliott Woods himself has followed in bringing up ! his family of helpers. In the old days Mr. Clark's boys would work all-day and &11 night to get a hard job done— and similarly Mr. Woods works with Ipers today. They haye often warmed their dinners in the boiler room and indulged in a kazoo band, awakening tfie Capitol polic® back to work through the still hours of the; night until the job Is done right—i with a joy in the doing and ay pride in the work. i Mr. Clark was for years an invalid while Mr. Woods was his assistant. One of Mr..Woods’ first big jobs was to reconstruct the old library space— the Congressiona] Library had just moved out to its own magnificent n&v building. Nelson W. Aldrich,; Stephen B. Elkins and Joseph W. Bailey as' members of the committee on rules, with Speaker Henderson, “Private” John Dalzell and “Uncle Joe” Cannon, then chairman of tyhe committee on spyfopriations, weré a commission declaring that they want- ed that space made over into commit- tee Tooms for use for the next Goh- gness. They allowed from September 1to Deeem)l'nr 1 to get all materials, tear out all the old partitions and construction and. put in the mew. They. asked ,Wpods how, much 1t ! j @cross the brim is one of Mr. Woo la picture of me {doing: He has charge jate and House office building must understand the mechanical prob- | would cost, and he said he couldn't tell, so they put through a resolution unique in Congress for “the sum necegsary,” thus giving him an un- limited appropriation. He protested but Uncle Joe said, “We'll trust you.” and Congress has had trust in Eiliott Woods ever since. When Mr. Clark died ‘the American Institute of Architects—whose secre- tary was a candidate for the position of architect of the Capitol—protested vigorously to President Roosevelt against appointing any one who wax not an architect as Clark’s successor Elliott Woods was not 2 trained architect. But Cohgress to a man stood behind him. The House and Senate sent petitions signed by every | member of Congress then in the city to the President, with “Uncle Joe" Cannon heading the House delegation. Just about that time “Untle Joe” and “T. R."” were not particuarly friendly, and Cannon had not been to the White House in some time. But the trip in behalf of Mr. Woods reunited these two stalwarts. | effected a sosevelt compromise by suggesting to Con- | Bress that if they would change the title of the office from architect to superintendent he would appoint Mr { Woods—and this was done. Last year the title was chanzed back again, be- cause since then Mr. Woods has won over the opposition, been elected a member of the bocal chapter and made a fellow of the Institute of Architects—so the sore spot has been happily healed. . ko Colleeting water glasses and mak- ing mus by rubbing his hands fads, but besides that, he is a real good musician and has written sev- {eral operas. Some years ago Mr Woods got considerable notoriety throughout the country as a violin player and he explains how that hap- pened: “I had always dabbled in musi and playéd the violin a little, but I took up the study of instruments in order to write for them and or- | chestrate. A friend of mine in New York sent me a violin worth $5,000 to study. T set it up so as to have a photograph made, and while I was not expecting it the photographer took with the violin that went all over the country and I was credited with being a great viollnist.” Heré is a terse summary of the work Elliott Woods has done and is of the repairs and maintenance of the Capitol build- |ing, House and Senate office build- ings, with care and maintenance of the grounds. driveways and walls belonging to those buildings. He has the care and maintenance of the Cap- itol “power plant. supplying heat, light and power for the Capitol, Sen- and light and power for the Library of Congress, the government hotels for government employes and heat. light and power for the coast and geodetic He has the care and main-, tenance of the engine hous and House stables Senate direct charge of making the repairs to the He of Columbia courthous. supplied heat, light and power, irs to the Columbia Hospital Women. He has charge of re and construction of such other gov- eriment buildings as gre committed to the charge of the architect of the Capitol by Congress, such the $200,000 job on the dormitory at Kendail Green the Beaf. During the past twenty yeags the following buildings have been erect- ed under Mr. Woods: House and Seu- ate office buildings with the sub- nnecting the same with the Capitol; the Capitol power plant, costing $2.500,000: the Cobrt of Ap- peals building, costing $300,000; the dormitory at the Columbia Institution for the Deaf, Columbia Hospital for Women, costing $350.000; an additional fifth floor to the House office building. the reconstruction of the District of Columbia courthouse, costing $850,000. He had 244 houses removed from the plaza between the Capitol and Union station: had the central portion of\ the Capitol reconstructed, including the formation of twenty-eight rooms in the old library space. He remod- eled the quarters ‘of the Supreme Court of the United States and statu- . Gallaudet Coliege for ary hall. He put in a new ventilla- tion. system in both the House and Senate, and remodeled the lunch- rooms and Kitchens in the Capitol. * * k¥ Some little detailed explanation of the work of ‘the Capitol power plant Ay serve to show.the magnitude of this one comparatively small part of Mr. Woods' varied responsibilities. This plant furnished light, heat and power for the entire group of build- ings surrounding the Capitol. It fur- nishes heat for 45,613,550 cubic feet pf space, current for 49,750 electric lights, 1,217 electric fans and power for motors totaling 1,466 horsepower. The plant furnishes current to forty- nine electric elevators and lifts with- in this group of buildings. One of the little jobs that Mr. Woods is responsible for is to give the Statue of Freedom surmounting the Capitol dome a bath regularly. This is done { with a very strong solution of castile | sohp and water. No effort is made to remove the green verdigris, which is considered by the best artists to en- hance the value of such statues, and this has given rise to repeated com- plaints that he should have this mon- ster statue sandpapered. It usually takes 4,200 gallons of mixed paint to paint the Capitol dome —the usual estimate is nine tons of paint and two months' work for thirty-five men Uncle Sam's pet dome is of iron and has to be given a coat of white lead regularly to prevent the weather from making rust holes in it. It does not pay to take any chances when there are 9,000,000 pounds of iron roof over a building crowded with patriots and statesmen chosen of the people. The art gallery of which he is cus- todian_contains statues of the great men who aided in developing the sev- &ral states, busts of the Vice Presidents, ‘portraits of the Speakers, historic paint- ing by the greatest artists, and unsur- passed mural decorations by the greal Brumidi. e “Build thée more stately mansions, oh, my soul!” is Architect Woods' senti- ment s he constantly improves whai he takes joy in believing is his memorial