The San Francisco Call. Newspaper, June 21, 1903, Page 14

THE ‘SUNDAY CALL. s 214 men s r g g fter a I ay ™ a A second time you will proba see t that any washing jone by yourself or any t your sehold takes or & - e wo or th team w not n that day’s game? Per u we the m money s it was u were : a est girl ar s, was in vi . t on a base- game a be to a of 3 sonment. It or g mat The oo e when spending a holi a ake to show your ¥o es 1o make and fly a kite? N th the spirit of a - se of peace and harm ma ou taught the b t er air sort of kite, in e of 2d not made one for ma s. N t vour prids war d I ysiasm as you tood be- L e er and saw the thing of we nd paper wiggle its 1 mind. As a mat 1 wever, you were giving the young- = crime, provided your ere between Devisadero For the crime of kite limits there is & maxi- fine six months’ was anyw did your crimes for the day stop ible that while you e poss were be keeping your young- et ef, your eldest hopeful was ¢ w a gang of other boys in a t “somewhere in the neighbor- ¥ having a game of ball without each one of them having in his pocket the . d permission of the own- . the hat would mean another $m x months if the boy were prose- § to the full extent of the law. And f you took a football and got out in the st of the house with one or two of ur own or the neighbors’ obfil- dr began kicking the ball about, or game that might tend o frig horses, it would bring the cost of the day's festivities up to $1500, o € 1 to eighteen months as the z of county. If any of these gemes, or any conduct in which you chance to induige at any time was of S a as to annoy persons pass- the highway or living on the premises, there would be an- v undred or six months to pay. u shalt not annoy thy neighbor with thy pleasures Did vou ever, when walking along the ®trect, finish reading a letter, tear it up and t the pieces away; or did you ever crumple the bag when the candy was alt If so, ar credit, and gone and throw it into the gutter? bere is an all the tri u s your lawier knew of his trade this litt ece of thoughtless. ness might be made to cost you $5%, with an alternative of six months’' imprisor me Thou shalt not make extra work for the st sweeper Did vou ever go out to the park and walk the ss? Of course you have Al erybody thinks he has a right to, but as a matter of fact walking on t grass in public parks is prohibited by law, $100 fine or three months’ imprisonment being the maximum penalty for the oi- fense. Thou shalt not walk upon grass that is not thy own. Did vou ever, while in the park, want ee oy s head and stand up That might se months. And if you and lie down on one of s and go to sleep it would bs dred out of your pocket. Thou use park benches except to sit were to feel lazy the ben another h on ther Did vou ever, in order to save time by making a short cut, or to get a closer view of some flower or of the gold fisn \ the pond, step over a chain or wall in- blic ‘park or any plat of park? This, too, is an of- able by the same fine or im- s in other park or- three months. Thou ot disregard the hints of Paik Commigsioners . Did vou ever, when strolling down with your dog, cut through Union square? Doy are not allowed in any pub- lic park or plaza, and for taking one in you might be made to pay $20, and lose your dog in the bargain. Any policeman has authority to shoot a dog found in any public park, or to send for the poundman and his net. Thou shalt not let thy dog share the people’s pleasure grounds. Did vou ever start out for a drive, and while spinning along at a good gait fail to bring the horse to a walk at every street crossing? 1f so you were acting in direct violation to & law which places & maximum penalty of $500 or six months infringement. And it while going at this expensive rate you decided to avold the jolt of the cobble stones by driving on the streetcar tracks and the wheels on one side of the car- riage stayed on the track and the wheels on the other side did . not this would double the offense and double the penalty. If, again, you came to where there was a fire hose lying across the street ana, rather than turn back and make a de- tour of the block, you drove over the hose there might be another lawsuit ana more damages to pay, up to $500. Inter- rupting a funeral procession is another thing the driver must look cut for, as this i# prohibited by law with a $00 penalty. Thou shalt mnot drive In un- seemly haste over street crossings, nor help make ruts in the pavement; neither ghalt thou scorn the right of the fire department or show disrespect to the dead. Did vou ever get busy and clean up the vard and decide that the best way to get Tid of this rubbish and the box of trash your wife had accumulated was to burn it? Did you start your bonfire with- out first securing a written permit from prisonment that app! a s, $100 or in jail on such the Mayor? If you did you committed & crime you might be made to answer for to the extent of a $500 fine or six months’ imprisonment. Thou shalt not endanger thine own property or that of your neigh- bor unless the Mayor says so. Did vou ever, say at election time, got to arguing as to who was the better man of two candidates or the better of two policies, and, forgetting yourself in the heat of the moment, say something that your fellow arguer might feel called upon 1o resent? There is a fine of $00 or six STEPPINCy OVEIR. T ENCE I AT STANDING O BENAN 1IN TARG STANTIIN G 'BoxErvE. WITHRowT TMAYOR'S TERITTIS=S10TT months’ {mprisonment for just such doings, for you have been guilty of lan- guage tending to a breach of ths peace. '.l'ho:x| shalt not rouse thy neighbor to wrath, Did vou ever buy tickets for theater or i “?TY ITVT O ASITELS wWooDEIT BARTRIAL- opera and find at the last minute that the young woman you were counting on to help use them couldn’t go? The nat- ural thing to do under such clrcum- stances, if you didn't want to go alorne, was to sell them to any friend you might meet who thought he could use them. But never do this again without taking out a ticket peddler's license, which can be had for a hundred dollars. Rather tear the tickets up and throw them away (be-. ing careful not to throw them in the street), for by selling tickets without a li- cense you become liable to conviction of a crime punishable by $500 fine or the usual alternative of six months’ imprisonment. Thou shalt not tamper with the rights of the box-office man. Did vou ever walk up to a cigar stand with a friend and offer to match money or throw dice for the smoke? There is probably not a smoker in San Francisco who has not done this a hundred times, vet there is a statute on the books that says that such an act, done in a public ace or where it may be seen by persons passing on the street, is a misdemeanor, ‘for which the penalty may be fixed the Judge at $500 or six months in Jail. Thou shalt not make thy neighbor run the risk of having to pay for thy cigars when he may not want to. Did you ever put your revolver in your pocket to take it down to the gunsmith for repairs, without fight securing a per- mit from the Police Commissioners? Did you know, when you did it. that you were guilty of a crime with a penalty of any- where from $# to %00 or from three to six months’ imprisonment? Of might go about the streets months at a time with guns or daggers or other deadly weapons in your clothes and no bad intentions in your heart, bu vou if it happened by any aceident that you were standing near when some man walked up and knocked another down, and in the interest of fair play took a hand in the affair, you wc probably have unpleasant gquestions to answer in court as to why you carried concealed weapons. Likewise, there is nothing criminal about a man’s carrying a skeleton key to open the doors of his own house with; but if such a man ever came under sus- picion, no matter how entirely unfounded, the fact of his having In his pocket what is termed a burglarious tool would mili- tate against him. The penalty for carry- ing burglars’ tools is $00 or six months. Thou shalt not lay thyself open to un- pleasant suspicions. Did vou ever, in a spasm of charity, take off your hat to the woman who came into your office with a little package of tickets in her hand, and let her talk you into buying a chance in a silk quit and a sofa pillow to help some poor, old, homeless body that goes to your church? Charity is a noble sentiment, but next time hand the woman the money outright and let her keep the ticket, which in the eves of a law based cn equity, not char- ity, is no better than any other lottery icket. Not only do you throw yvourseif able to prosecution for the crime of buying a lottery ticket, but the woman having the tickets is guilty of a misde- meanor, and the punishment in either case is a fine of $500 or six months In jail. If your sympathy for the poor old lady who made the quilt was great enough to cause you to offer to dispose of some-of the tickets among your friends, this would be a second offense equal to the first. Thou shalt not dally with Chance, even when she appears to you In the guise of charity. Did vou ever, forgetting the part of a gentleman, spit upon the floor of a street car, or in the corridor of a public build- ing, or even on the sidewalk? Many a emoker does one or all of these a dozen times a day. Each time he does it he commits a crime, and any policeman alive to his duty has power to arrest him; and the Police Judge has the law behind him for a fine of from one‘to twenty-five doi- lars, or ten days’ imprisonment. Thou shalt not shock the sensibilities nor en- danger the health of thy neighbor. Did vou ever, when the sweetest girl on earth dropped the bunch of violets you had just given her, stoop and pick them up and step to the nearest drinking fountain and give them a dip to wash the dirt off? Perhaps the smile she gave you when you passed the violets to her was worth a good deal to you, but was it worth $500 or a term of six months in jail? Thigds the penalty for washing fiowers of a rag of any kind in a public drinking fountain. Any one might in- form on you, and for so doing would be entitled to half of the fine imposed. Thou shalt not mistake a public drinking foun- tain for a wash tub. Did you efer have a cat or dog of which you were very fond take sick with an infectious or contagious disease, and fall to report it to the Board of Health? Or, having properly reported the case, upon advice of the Board of Health or a responsible veterinary that the pet could not get well, failed to destroy it? o, having destroyed it, thought to give it decent burial and made a grave in the back yard within five hundred feet of your own or some otherMouse? Any one of these sins of omission or commission is punishable by law and the penalty at- tached months’ love thy neighbor. Did vou ever, on moving day, to let a lamp chimney fall and and, picking up the pieces, go to fence and fling them upen the hood trash pile in the adjoi t so, you have added one more to a lor list of everyday crimes, and might cost you $500 or six months It would be the same if your wife, sweeping day, gathered up th and household rubbish a the dump heap, or if the reach $500 or s Thou shalt mot better than thy thereto may imprisonment. cat or happen break, n made similar disposition of the raked from the lawn. Thou shalt not be too stin to send thy rubbish to the crema- tory. Did vou ever, after sec fer from the street car com ng & trans- tor, change or take an-~ your m 1d decide to walk other car, and with a generous impulse toward some one waiting on_the corner for a car say, “Here, you can use this transfer”? If you have done this, don’t ever do it again. for it i & criminal of- fense. and conviction thereof might mean udgment against you for $00, and in default of ithis there would be the usual six months in jail. Thou shalt not ask the street car company to carry twe fpr a nickel Did vou ever get excited and ‘use words not suitable for publication within the hearing of two or more persons? That's another $500 or six months. Thou shalt always speak as though there were ladies present. 3 Did vou ever, when walking along the street or standing in a public building, peel an orange or banana and idly throw the skin on the sidewalk or floor? A State on a banana skin, 1 the outcome’of it legislator once slipped fell and was hurt all was the pa throwing of these people might trip . meanor, punishable by a five-dollaf fine shalt not e life or lmb. attending to™ the eset a man in the ake the ashes:from or two days | danger thy neigh Did vou ever, in household duties th ear morning hours the »ve or grate and put them in & wooden bucket, or in a barrel? This won't do. The Fire Commissioners are on the trail of men who do this thing, and a metal receptacle is much less ex- pensive than a $500 fine or six months’ enforced retirement from business. Thou shalt not get that ashes ars not ale ways as cold a they look. Did vou ever. when wishing to hlteh your horse, find that there was no hitch- ing post or ring in the block, and let Jamp-post, hydrant or a tres near the curb serve your purpose? This may seem the only thing to do, but the Board of Supervisors has said “thou shalt’-mot,” and have emphasized it by attaching = penalty of $00 to conviction of the of- fense. Did vou ever, when your patiencs was worn to a shred by waiting on some man who persistently refuses to pay what he owes you, send him a postal cazd an- nouncing that if-fe didn't pay by the first of the month the matter would b put in the hands of an attorney for coi- lection? If you ever did and Uncle Sam dmpper‘cd to cast an eye over the con- nts of the card the chances are tha you would find yourself paying five lars or spending a year in some peni tiary for having broken a United States law. Thou shalt not publish to the world that your neighbor does not pay his debts. Did you ever thoughtfessly strike a match on a mailbox, making a streak on the nice, fresh paint? These boxes be- long to your Uncle, too, and there is a law against the defacement of Govern- ment property, fixing the penalty at $100) or three years' imprisonment. shalt not get foolish with your Uncle Samuel and his things. Did vou ever ask anybody else to do any of these things? You may have mere- Iy suggested it by act or word, but in so doing you were inciting another to crime, and the law says that one who daes this is a dangerous person, and upon convic- tion may be fined $00 or sent to jail for six months. Thou shalt not start afother on the downward path. Here, then. is a list of crimes that any decent, right-minded, well-meaning and supposedly law-abiding citizen of San Franeisco might commit and never for an instant lose the love of his wife or the re- spect of his friends. One man might com- mit them all in a week and by doing so incur penalties aggregating $13.406 or im- prisonment for sixteen years, ten-months and twelve days. And all the time he might Inveigh against the wife-beater, the footpad, the incendlary, who could not show a record for criminality equal to hig own. ‘Will all the people in San Fran. cisco who are innocent of crime please rise? BERTHA H. SMITR.