The Nonpartisan Leader Newspaper, June 15, 1916, Page 16

meN N ILL B. -CRAFTY was in a happy mood: He had just returned from a trip to the Sin Twitties, where he had made . arrange- ments for large quantities of slush money to put the campaign through the et with s reception to his lieu- ténants, backers, gumsnoers, button- M&s, mudslingers and general utility Thewordhadbeenpassedalcmgthat big things would be doing at the boss’s keadquarters-and that all who could give the grip, password and grand hailing sign of the Blackhand Organization of Character Assassins would be thrice welcome. R The aggregation that gathered was an imteresting one—and one that will go down in history, as it will be the last one of its kind to ever assemble under one tent and it is well and timely that it be uemdedhuesothatfntmgmemum may Yevere and do homage to the noted who- fwghtsovnhanflytn pexpetuate the bondage and in- &ntnflservxtudenfthesutequorth Dakota. HERE THEY ARE; LIST OF THOSE PRESENT Wil B. Crafl:y, notorious boss and political slugger, headed the list. Next to the big boss came H. E. Smoothe—or Sub, as’' he was commonly called, the personal aid of Crafty. Next in impor- tance was I ‘B. Slipry, first lieutenant, and 1. M.. Dodger, second lieutenant. In addition there was Putty, M. T. Head, political gumshoers and I. $. Inbad, I M. Guilty, M. U. D Hen,a.ndI S. Hardnut, editors. = Then there followed a long list of les- ser lights of the buttonholing and gen- eral utility characters. Indeed the big boss’s headquarters was crowded. Big Biz occupied a seat near Crafty and all except I. M. Guilty were puffing indus- triously at fat cigars while a cloud of blue smoke hung over the scene. In.addition to the large quantity of cigars there was also a plentiful sup- ply of cold bottles in a convenient closet, which was invaded by various members of the party at will. The lone exception to this was that of Dr. I. M. Guilty, who repeatedly protested his purity of body as well as mind, and there- fore refused to be contaminated with such vile stuff. An hour of revelry, good fellowship, laughter, and loud talking had slipped away when-Crafty arose, steadying him- ~-gelf by the corner of the table and with a broad, silly grin wreathing his bloated face, surveyed the’ maze of upturned. faces that greeted him. ¢ 4G-g-gentlemen,”he stammered, thick- lippedly, “I’'m goin’ to act as- t-t-toast- masher, vigorous clapping of hands, punctuated with “hear! hear!” from several quarters of the room; Crafty hiccoughed and his fat head wobbled while his pudgy body ' swayed under its heavy load of liquer. “Thish celebrashun, g-g-gentlemen, (hi¢) ish ' in—in—contemplashun,” ‘ash you might shay, of the g-g-great victory we're goin’ to win at the polls on the- the-28th of June.” Another round of applause greeted this statement. _“After, the t-t-trials, (hic) trubbles an’ tribulations (hic) that we have gone through with (hic) I am happy to a-a-anounce to you, g—g-gentlemen, (hie) that we have succeeded in gettin’ a most satisfactory line-up.”. Still ' another spasm of applause gave: Crafty a chanee »bogetlns equlibrium.. Crafty saw that he was making a fool’ 'dunmlelf forltwumethatheevet So Why Worry Even 1f Gang is Defeatedp Big Biz Speaks Some Encouraging Words permitted liquor to get the mastery over him upon any occasion. His work re- quired clear thinking and accuracy of mind action. But it appears that the strenuous experiences and reverses of the past few months had been too much for the strong will of Mr. Crafty and in an effort to bolster up his courage and dull his senses to the sting of defeat he had yielded to the seductive appeals of John Barleycorn. A moment's realiza- tion of the degree to which he was los- ing his old time grip: on himself fright- ened the big boss and he made a vigor- ous effort to master himself und get a better control of his tongue. And he succeeded to a large degree. “It was the best we could do,” he went on, mak- ing heroic efforts to. master his whirling brain, “and I believe the best that could be done. This man Butrick has con- siderable of a reputation as the farm- ers’ friend. Of course there is a big difference in being a farmers’ friend and in being a farmer. But not many farm- ers know the difference! Now- look at me,” and he patted himself on the chest, “I'm a friend of the ia.rme.r. I hke hxm. I don’t hate him. But that don’t mean that I want him to make laws for him- self. ¥f he.did where would you and I: get off? (Applause and vigorous nod- ding . of heads.) - “This man Butrick: is not the man -we want, though he might- not be bad if we happened to get him. He'’s a politician and knows the game and I think if elected we can depend on him to be good. He cannot accept sup- port from us and then double-cross us if elected.” (More applause and nodding of heads.) = “Qf course, we really want to elect Col. Freight Traine and we are using Butrick merely as a stalking horse—° merely as a blind to split the farmer vote between Butrick and Frazier and thus let Traine in. In order to fool the farmers we must appear to oppose Traine but on the quiet we must pass the word out to vote for him and kuife Butrick. “'I‘hismanl"‘n.sier!sgomgbobehud_ to beat but if we san scare the farmers into splitting up . their: atrength between Yim and Butrick the better ehance. 'l‘raine will have. Sp, remember Nobody Bosses “Blll” Langef' Edn:or Nonpartlsan Leadzr Recently there have been puhhshed in some of the newspapers of the sbate statements that some of the candidateés were approached by some of the Lea- gue’s officers or agents or by other parties achng in their behalf. Ilmownothmgasbowhlthasbeen done in-other instances, bu} as far as I am personally concerned I knew noth- ing about getting any indorsement from the Nonpartisan League until after I was indorsed at Fargo and was called up on the telephone and asked to come down and give a speech. . I promised nothing to any one con- nected either directly or indirectly with the Farmers’ Nonpartisan Political League, nor did 1 give any pledges of any nature or description. I was glad to get the support of the League, and am not one bit worried about ‘the blind-pig element of the county beating me here on the ground that I am a Socialist, anarchist or exalted I. W. W. I promise you now, however, that if |§ I 'am ‘elected attorney general of this state, I -will ' ENFORCE THE LAWS RIGIDLY IN BEHALF OF THE _LIT- TLE FELLOW AS WELL. AS THE BIG FELLOW, AND THAT THERE [f WILL NOT BE ANY FAVORS. Also 1 | am not afraid of any political gang, ~-whether they consist of members of the whisky ring or whether they pretend to WILLIAM LANGER here today.” There was a be sanctimonious ‘gentlemen. Candidate for Attorney General If anyone .believes that anyone will run ‘the office of attorney general except myself, they will find out within a few days after I take office, that they were mistaken. I thoroughly approve of farmers orgamzmg to protect their own mtemst.s. ey Yours very truly, “WILLIAM LANGER. N e e S S ;3 WORKS IN DARK Editor Guild advises Candidate Bur- dick to “play ‘thé game with ‘dash ‘and vigor.” Probably if the ex-minister of -the ‘Fargo morning no-spaper knew the attitude of the farmers of the state he -~ would not blame Burdick for losing his -political dash and wgor.—WELLS COUNTY FREE PRESS = NO CHANCE, FROGGY : According to the Nonpartisan Leader ‘George 'J, Smith, alleged: candidate for governor, is writing a goodly bunch oi soft soap to the barbers of the state, in an ‘endeavor to get them to forward his is hardly probable that any of the -bar- bers of the state will fall for the “dope,” as they are an unusually intelligent class of business men—NEW ROCKFORD DAILY CAPITAL. g " WILL THEY f‘sT;sz, : - “There is a tide in the affairs of every man which taken ‘at flood, leads on to fortune.” - Will ‘the farmers rise upon themselves and prosperity or will they hearken to the siren song of the Guilds and men like him, only to.be drawn into _the clutches of Big Buqmess, Capitalism _and ani!ege?—Bmon Corners Corres- candidacy thhout a.ny of the filthy lucra. : in’ the 'LAM ‘pondence in . corks, the present tide' and ‘sécure all this for - _ text of personal" plan: boost . for. Butrmk in the open, and work- like devils ‘for /Traine in' the dark, under cover and on the side, and I think we'll be able - to put' Traine across.” (Hand clapping and: etampmg of feet.) “Now gentlemen,” ‘he said, looking’ about the room and gla.ncmg at Big Biz," who sat near him, “I am going to intro- duce to you a gentleman who, I thmk, .will have encouraging mnews for. us.” He bowed low and concluded, “Gentle- men, .our friend and benefactor, Big Biz,” and sat down- amid thunders of applause, cries of “hear! hear!” and stamping of feet. BIG BIZ PROMISES PLENTY OF FUNDS - - Big Biz arose and addressed. vt‘he boys _ as follows: . “I am gratified to meet you fellows. I am also pleased to-announce for your consolation and encourage- ment that the wherewithal is forthcom= ing. A big: battle is pending. _Just the other day an'order for 250,000 stamped envelopes was placed with the postal. department .at Grand Prongs. Letters, lies: and slander of the-vilest cha.ract_g.r ever sent through the mails are beipg, prepa.red and will be sent out to every. voter in the state, in fact every éitizem; of the Btate Just a few, days before. the primatigs. will ‘be an avalanche which ‘we _helieve the farmers’. .organiza- tion will be unable to withstand. I want- you fellows to stay on the job, day and night.- “We've got the money and it will be poured out like water. ‘Now go to it and keep -at it till the last minute.” _(Tumultuocus applause.) . The next speaker introduced was Slipry. He was to respond to the toast “What of the Outlook?” : He said: “The idea suggested by Big Biz is a capital one. In my judgment one of the gravest mistakes we have made is that of-launching the mudsling- ing ‘attack too soon. ~Our friend Guilty over there, while a good scrapper, in my. Judgment launched his mudboat too eaxly. in the game. . It gave the- League time to come back and now the whole mess has, ‘to.some degree, reacted. The only diflku]ty I ‘see. now,-is that we. have raked heaven and hell and scraped the earth for lies-and I don’t’see where we'’re goin’ to get any more. But if we can launch a bunch of bad ones right on the eve of the election I think there’s:.a chance.”. (Weak and . unspmted ap- plause.) . . The next speaker mtroduced was. Dr. Guilty. His remarks were bneI and. to the point. : “T admit. my mistakes,”. he -sgid; “but you. must _remember- thaty 1 am new: at _ this‘game. I -will ‘state: NOW,. however, that 1. have leamed a lesson, ‘and one that has cost me dearly, but I am ready . to take advice from’those who ¥mow from longer- expenehce than 1-have had: So, S Butnck to spht the fa.rmers’ vote and thus electing Traine, “This is our only hope,” he concluded,” and there is a: . possibility that it-will work. ' If it don’t then, good night!” and he threw up his hands in a gesture of despair. . For another hour the speeches con- tinued. They were all along the same line as herein outlined. Then more cold bottles were brought out, followed by a fresh box of cigars.. The popping of clinking ™ of glasses, “clouds’ ‘of smoke and the sounds of coarse and vul- gar language was more than the sen- sitive and refined and - delicate’ ‘soul of . Dr. Guilty could stand, so ‘on the pre- buSmess_, ‘he ‘excused ‘himself and: left the room. *‘Meanwhile the Tevelry, the good fellowship ‘and the celebration continued' till the axctIlCraph went to sleep and fell off ‘the ‘window .sill—bntxlanded in a pile of excelsior. whicb saved nt from damuge: I ) B