Chicago Daily Tribune Newspaper, February 21, 1874, Page 11

'"THE CHICAGO DAILY TRIBUNE:-SATURDAY, FEBRUARY 2l A874—SUPPLEMENT. L 26FPING THE QUESTION. ] 4 @hy the Privilege Is Considered ‘u Men's Prerogative, } fhe Besults of the One-Sided Systeui.— i ( Man Proposes, but Woman \ Disposes. L An Argument for Equality. The mythical first man and first woman were 3 the usual preliminaries of matrimony. Yhero wes meither the difficulty of makinga ise choico nor the pain of & refusal for Mr. Adsm; and Mrs. Adam that was to ‘e did not sit pensive in Paradise, avwaiting tho ‘“pop” with Hemulons anxiety, nor was she compolled to Tay hersell out on elaborat leaf-drapery to catch & husband. 5o, in the beginning of things, it secms, the marriage-contract Wwas a more fair wd oqual adjustment than the ONE-SIDED SYSIEM sinca'sdopted. Ono -woman, at loast, had the 4dds on her sido in this world; but, as soon 23 gvor there was even a"Hobson's choico for the ons of Adam, we find the Leahs left out in the wld; and, to this day, many as beautifal and sadesed women have hidden a life-long heart- hunger bepeath sn indifferent or cynical ex- terior, snd knelt humbly before some shrine <hich held the image of one Who passed them nnoticed by, snd whom thoy knew was their soul's mato, but dared make no sign. In their ity and noble intent they veiled themselves; Vhile other women **set their caps” and caught thonoble soul, who proved thereby wedlock a gnare and women sirens, and bore his fate a8 manfally a8 circunstances would ailow... Tho paramount resson why man arrogates to pimself the prerogative of ** popping the ques- tion,” i8 B - '} WHOLLY THE PECUNTARY ONE. Wo are told that etiquette requircs that fhe money-question should be quietly kept in the background, notwithstanding it is con- Sopallf in the foroground of the mutual {hought. Tho right of man to “/pop the ques- fon” falls to him by reason of the pecuniary responsibility to which he sub- focts humselt by taking to himself a wile. % woman may lawfully use all ler arts and wiles, and employ all her coquettish power, to bring about the *popping;" but’ she msy never ** pop” herself. Thia pecuniary rea- son is thus set down by people in genoral as de- ciding the privilege, and forever hnshing the sgitation of any questlonsblo suggestions upcn the justico of the matter. Lut, in theee latter @55, when marringe is becoming an intricate msze, made up of experiences, and unmade by incompatibilittes, it is tho fashion of a few icon- oclasts to poke their noses into thie, as well as other social mazes, or messes, * we might more soperly say, and smell out what is tho cause of e corruption that rises foul to heaver, and uk “What is goiug to be done about it?"” ‘The inequalicy of the sexes is stamped a3 em- phatically in regard to **popping tho question” 131n casting the vote; and the money-reason which is urged for this one-aidedness is the very wabject which A FIRST NEEDS THE ATTENTION of the strong-minded noses, Women universally 1re beggars, although they ‘may never beg ‘the band of sn admired gentleman. Solong ns they coutinue to boe beggars, they must sccept tho band of the first man, or the richestman, Who pever nceds to beg anything eave a fair band. When women become self-supporting and inde- pendent, and are fres to refuse, if not to thoose, there will be less businoes for diyorce-manufac- torers. There is mo alternative for theso women-beggars but merriage, sad all gurplus energy is devoted religiously to securing a hus- band, by fair means or foul. Into tho wiles the Srst tnan that is drown is seized upon: there is danger in standing upon any ground of partica- laritv. * Bo he a rono or a religionist matters but little; boherich - AUTTERS EVERYTHING. The rich man bas about s unsafe & prospect in this world as in kingdom-come. Ho can herdly enter Heaven with mopey-bags; he can bardly escape matrimony with them. Rich men, Bowever, aro thus speedily disposed of. They aro the first game bagged. Thon come the rising young men; and mammas-exert extrsordinary ‘mancuvering tactics to decoy this_class, and they are soon done for. Thoy Lave been * pop- ped.” in spite of their * pooping " prerogative. Now, this is all very well for the weaker half of humtanity 8o far. Tbe odds would rather ap- pear to be in their favor. They get hasbands, #nd may-be get tho ones they desire ; but this is by no means certain. At all events, the social jangle gencrally grows out of this sort of mar- Tinges: Tactitionary beckers do mot, however, surround the majority of women. Propartion- ata effort is made individually sccording to the potency of the *poppee; " but thereare many women who cannot consant to * set their caps,” fiod who ** bide & wee ” in modest hiope. BUT ALTOGETHER VAIN— tbat merit will win against maneavering, aod their sonl’s mate go a-seeking its kindrad spirit, s long 28 it canmot go a-secking him. Rarelr, once or twice in u generation masbe, a woman Iag the money-power, and, like Browning's 4G@ecevieve,” woos, and wins, and ', the man the loves and prefers above sll others. * Bat the begearly lot dare notdo so untoward a thing. What matters a broken heart or 8o, provided con- ventional etiquette is preserved immaculato ? Men reason, women feel, is the assertion we bear continually made ; aud the truth of this as- sertion is urged sgainst & woman's ability to decide in matters that pertain to ber welfare. As Lovo has not yet been reduced to a ecience (s confidently expect that tho timo 15 coming ¥hen it will be, however); as it is an_emotional quelity altogether,—why should not the feeling v the predominance over the resoning in s matter of marrisge? 1f woman i8 intuitive, .y should ehie niot be ALLOWED TO ACT UPOS INTUITION? She often sees in men qualities peculiarly at- tractive to her. Sho feels that thesé qualities . a2 the very opea that wonld insure her happi- . Shie sindios character closely, Buch en are the last ones in the world to over- step conventional ‘custom. * They may not care fir Mrs. Grundy, but they do caro for tho man of their choice. and know men well enoigh 20be acsured that even the wise, good men they Tecognize as mates would scorn them aid they dare declare such recognition. The best of men Iold highly the privilege of ** popping the ques- fon ;™ and the womsuly woman Withdraws into shell of reserve prescribed by custom, ushes fecling, accepts the hand of the man ¥ho prefers her, and gives him her hand, and ‘¥hile her heart ensbrines a_blisafal dream she ot dare make a-realization. The cry of ) MARRIED, NOT MATED, I Finging to-day throngh tho length and breadth of theland, “What if women should set about theosing their mates, and ece if things would any better? When domestic difficulties 8 brewed, who generally receives the blame? Lis yon, 0" Woman, to whom the preacher and thateachor appeala”to translate jsngling into lody.” You must be more amisbie; you must moro this, that, and the othor, to make home 3beaven, he din_of thess a{)punlu nearly dives her to distrsction. She exclaims, Hero is wasther one-sided business, only on the, other £do this time. She may or,may ot know-just ¥hat's the matter that she cannot, do what she L make heavenly music ont of the married Yate. Tt mattersnot; musicis expected, and Beis o extract it. It gm\'cs = blurred score; ¢ keynote was soundéd wrong, snd the dis- b 2re continually recurring. 1f all this mel- T exacted depends mpon the womsn, then, in ber_:l;is&nme, let hier get tho right keynote !o WOMAN DISPOSES, proposes. On ber does rest the Jmony of tho home. It may be, conld she P her mate, that there would be a con- akd chirmping in hernest continually, albeit ¥4 crowded with fledglings who depended on Emn\hemua and denied her the delights of .lfl"fi, o world, in place cof this continous T, Of Weariness which babydomr elicits. nfm is the disposer in the houspghold, after 4 I Sbugh man f s Toler we must look to regulate this infe- (2 the pretchers must tako » newtext from sy to ‘inculeate barmony. Cry aloud sod ling, ™t to mothers to educato their daugh- N °* '+ PRACTICAL BUSINESS, &4 of pragticing coquettish _ arts -to icateh L1its bmsu;esn that- is the reproach of domes- 8" 10 train them to selfirelianch; to T ,‘,‘;"’Fm relf-supporting, and give them such Xms in lifa that they csn we'l wait, and alord 10 wait, for the coming of the kin- dred spiritd-filling their days with useful; and their portemouneies wilh“grenuhmmra‘;lsg bide the advent of the true mate. A woman may thus be able to wed a good man, though he e poor (and the name of these ia Jegion); she may balp bim buitd the homo-nest, aud 50 mako t suc oyous, home-place that il sigging sl b therein hear. mottng bk, Uoverty is never 8o bitter 4 curse as vl i keeps & lover from his beloved, and luv«l:: ?Ll:: :‘ ohl%.md!clu _worker in 'the weary, every-day ] arriage is too often a mi; sonid, 8 en 5 mistake, but no- ek o A oo omsE oz, ung women bo taught to mimpli methods of life, and become Eou!)g.lllg;)g"t‘: ing, snd, theroby save thousands of young men who cannot now afford io Tmarry from the miserable demoralization that befalls "n!muu inevitably the * not-marry- ing man.” *Poppiug the question” is assum- ing a more than usually serious phase in theso days of claboration and reckless extravaganco. Men aare not take the responsibilities of mar- riage withont a fortune, large or small; and many women are to-day losing the chance of foifilling the high mission of wife and mother, through the follies of the mass orsuncducated parssites who havo never been taught that to put their own shoulder to the wheel of fortunc i8 better than to hang a helploss burden upon a struggling man's shoulder. Girls must be prop- erly edacated for a lifa-work, before lifo can mean succees, uscfulness, and pleasure to them.' In the far-off good-time- epm&:g ):o{ o when sho bas secured oiber rights she ia now demanding,”she may posses: tho right to be %kt 5 A TRUE HELPMEET: E the right to claim for her labor of love such ‘money-compeneation as will jusure to her tho privilegs of being something moro to the hus- band than she is Jto-day,—his co-worker, bis counselor, his partner in the business of home- life, his earnest helper, his best friond and com- Ppapion. Perhaps, in that far-off time, she may possess the privilege of ‘* popping the question.” She may proudly suk the man sho loves to unite hia destinica with hers. 1f some wise, good man, poor perhaps, crosses Ler path, and she feals, Hero i6 the man who csn make of life a gracious bentson, she may go frankly and unabashed to him sod day, * I respect you, sir, and I admire vou. My regard is basod upoa your manly characteristics nng your_intellectual worth. Ilove you. I am convincedIcan make you happy. A WILL YOU LET ME TRY ?” A woman's moral consciousness and _integrity aro her strongholds now, and are duly recog- nized. If she commits herself to a promise, she conscientiously performs that promise ; and the man who would scorn such a proposal a5 this from Ler lips would be silly and unwortuy of the lovo she proffers. Botter ho eay yes, thankfully ; for he may be suro she will mever give over tho “irving.” The importanco of the sacred trust she Las assumed will never bo lost sight of. Al this one-sided_inequality in the zelative condition of tho sexes is & wrong that the world is waking up to, Ivhas been waking up slowly for centuries. Time was when women must not sit at table with men. Step by stop they climb into recognition of their rights, and claim them. Nover, 1n_the historv of the world, was the clamo louder than to-day. Injustice is the cry : LET US BUT HAVE JUSTICE, We cre tired of gallantry; we want liberts. We are individuals; let our individuality be reupocted. A woman has as much right to ssy whom e shall love as to love &t all; Dnas the same right to say, I lovo sou, a3 she has to feol the Influence of that great, comprehen- sivolaw, A manshould have the eame priv- ileges, on the other hand, as women posscss fo- day,—those of making himself a8 fair in my 1ady's oyes as ho will, and of saying No em- phatically, if he does not return her love. Ol! 1f ¢andor did but rule, instead of cunning, in the marrisge-contract, what an infiite amount of misery would be bsnishod from its conditions! Perfect equality alone will wsure erfect froedom. Frankness should be the oundation of the structure that is reared for all time. Mutual frankness and mutual funds will rivet permanent partnerships. FPut ‘money in thy purse, O oman, and ¢ POP THE QUESTION ' IF YOU WILL, and let us Beo what wo shall scp, Boyalty can do this now. A Quocn - may propose, znd lose nono of her dignity. Here the balance of beno- fitis on tho sidoof tho woman, and the invita- tion to the pjace of high rank is ber prorogative. 1f & lover should suo for _her hand, he would bo accused of mercenary motives. Hasten tho time when all women sball bo Queans truly, and the balance of benefit bo so equally adjusted that mercenary motives shall sink out of sight, sud the ideal marriage bo the common realization. Mores. HIBERNAL IMPATIENCE. 0 laggard year, that Iastssolong, When will thy leaden pinions rise, And thou break into heaving ékies, And be s dlsimprisonsd song 7 0 burst into the hesving Spring | And roll away those cold, dark days; Inspira Lolian notes of praise, That long to thaw 4 frozen wing. Tnou, too, art part of Naturch truth, And in {hy mystary thou art good ; Yet roll from over ficld and flood And bring us Spring's eternal youth, 1 long for April's sweet sublime, When Earth rocalls’tho bowers of Eve, And Angels in the night shall weave The. daintiest filagrea of Timo. When all the world shall answer God, In living greenness to the eye, Beneath su interilashing sky, And o'er a daisy-quickened sod. When fragrant comes Creation’s breath, 'And Naturo is a choral mute ; Life wakcs—and pulses faah and shoot— 1In Resurrection out of Death. —Chambers’ Journal. —_———— Prosper Merimée’s ¢ Letters o VUne Anconnuc.”? Y Paris Correspondence of the New York Herald, Thid is the sonsational book of the hour, and has all tho nterest of a first-rato novel and the importsnco of historical memolrs. ° Prosper Merimee was born in 1803, and died in 1870. He booame at an carly age secretary to a Cabiuct Munister, traveled mucg, learued much, achieved Qistinction a8 a novelist and archwologist, was elected to the Academie Fraucaiso in 1844, creat- ed an Imperial Senator in 1853, sud passed tho Jast soventeon vears of his life in the close intimacy of Napoleon IIL's Court. Ho was known by his writings to be a man of great talont; but his cold, polished munners and sarcastic conversation led fo the belief that Tio was » cynic, and tho publication of these posthumons letters, which reveal him a8 a man of Warm heart and exquisite sensibility, hae there- fore crested general surprise. ‘The book com- prises & series of letters written from the year 1836 down to the very day of Merimee's death— that is, during the period of thirty-four years— 10 » Iady with whors Merimeo was in love. The “Inconnue’s” nsme is not given, but she is known to be the daughter of an English Peor, and to have boen in her youth extremely besutiful. Merimee first met her in Paris and fell in love with her at first sight. Not being & w“ ing man,” howoyer, a8 ho himself ro- peatedly tells us, his affcation was not a sort Thich “tne “Inconnue” conld mccept a8 alicn upon her whole life. it was st lirst & Polito fliriation, but gradually Merimee gob wholly enthralled by the perfections of tho lsdy, and would have 8o {ar done violence to his na- ture 8s to propose marriago to her had sho not, unfortunately for him, married some one else just 38 he wae making np his mind to take this desperste leap. A strong sud pure platonic friondshuip then commenced between them, and oahoned nnabatod il Merimoo's death. It yas 8 friendship almost toa perfect for these un- Tomantiotimes. The pair saw little of each other, but they kept up sn unbroken correspond= ence, and Merimee's: letters, dated from all parts of the Continent—Paris, Cannes, Eno- gland, Germany, Italy, Egypt—constituto the most = wonderful literary » homage ever paid by an adorer to the woman of his heart. They are not love-letters—in the maudlin, lacka- daisical senee of that term. They are records of everything Merimee said, did, and heard; Gescyiptions of travel, anecdotes of court, socisl scandais, political impressions, literary chit- chat—all these things abound in them; and the Sories makes up & chronicle of the secret history of France during tho past thirty years such a8 iy well be compared with the famous ‘Me- moirs of St. Simon " in the last century. Ameri- Gans who would wish to learn what ort of s man e "Napoleon IIL iu the intimacy of privato friendship, how the Empress Eugenic Pked smong her friends, and what sort of people truly were the different big_people of O Feetond Empire will find information on all theso points in this amusing ‘book. The *In- e a ™ has boen freely blamod for making the Jetters public, and, considering what graphic pen sketches Merimee has made of many %flmamgfl Ned, it may be doubted whether the ! In- Connas * would ot hiave acted more kindly in G orring tho publication for another ten years . "Gnly then the book might have lost somo | of the keen present interest which it has now. THE LABORER'S HIRE. Something HMore than lionej—l’nyment Duo to the Zealous Worker, The Wages of Gratitude for the Gift of Endeavor. To the Editor of The Chicago Tridune: Sie: That the Iaborer is worthy of his hira in monoy, no one disputes. If you agree .to give a man so much, and he does the work for which you have contracted, you generally pay his bill without too much demur. But there is more than] the more money-payment of which the laborer ia worthy, and that is RECOGNITION OF HIS DESIRE TO DO WELL,— thanks for the good-will with which ho has workad,—the wages of gratitode for the gift of endeavor. And these aro just the wages which sroscldom, if over, paid. Yet it is amaz- ing what heart a lttle praise, born of human kindoess, puts into a man's work! Itislike asoul to the body,—like life breathed into brute matter. It warms the work- er a8 nothing clse can, and makes heavy burdens light and thorny paths easy. Unfortunately, praise is not so froquent as blame. People will attack and abuse vigorously enough, but they will not commend an effort; and, while they let nothing pass that displenses them, live a8 if dead and dumb ‘to all that ought to win regard. Every manifestation of virtue i to them only what we have to expect from all men, and doing one's duty is s matter of couree, and not to be commended, because of course. Service, though tho mogt loving, is & thing bought and paid for; snd when yon, their eervitor, have performed your part of the contract, they bave met it with theirs. Yon have no more to Bay. Any extra percentsgo of gratitude does not enter into their calculations ; aud pi 1T WAS ONLY HIS DUTY " i‘s t{.xa limitation to all they might be supposed to ecl. Nor, I contend that all service done with zeal and heart ought to be ropaid with gratitude aod recognition, extra the money-wages; and that no service is too emall, and no_gerver too mean, ta be 5o repaid, given tho conditiona. Tho epirit in which a thing is donc gnters into and transforms the most 1nsignificant act; and the very shopman who measures off a yard of ribbon can make his obligatory work a personal kindness by tho pains he takes to plesso, and the wish be has to treat you woll. Another man, who just docs what he is obliged to do, and no more, is like one of those sinnera #ho keep & promise to tho ear and break it to the Lope,—who obey the letter of tho Comnmand- ments and disobey the spirit of the Gospel. You have nothing to bring against him, but sou know that his service is grudgingly rendered, and that Le is only solicitous to the least he may. Youecryquits with Lim_ when you iay down your money, snd you feel that you have paid him ALL YOU OWE,— your bargain baving becn’ s material affair throughout,—s grudging one. Having found by oxperience that no extra en- deavor sccures even so much as a faint recog- pition, the man to whom praiso is dear steels himself against what Lo has learnt to call tho weaknees of giving himsolf trouble for auy- body, and henceforth rosolves to give the least and cxact the most within his power. Wrong is nlmgln roflex, and no fault can be committed which hss not its offspring and exaggerated result. i Recpgnition of endeavor is the most potent of al the influences which tho _superior can ex- erciso over the inferior. Desire of praise is stronger than dread of blamo in healthy minds, and love isan sctive and living _power, whero fesrs ‘aro only megative and repressive. Children . will = do more, and forbear moro, fo be caressed and applauded for their good behavior, than they will for fear :hey may bo punished and scolded for their bud. Tha approbation, tbe love, the carosses, of the Enmmu, rouse all that is best in them; their earts are warmed, their consciences satisfied, their ambition fulfilled : while constant reproof, if it does not break their spirt, tends to harden and make them robellious and defying,—Naturo giving the instinct of resistance as well as tho fmpulse of obedience. Of course there must bo reproof snd punishment, too, at times; but & free use of E GENEROTS RECOOGNITION, and a5 much caro taken that no cndeavor to do right shall pass unrowarded, a8 that no wrong- doing ehall pass unrebuked, will do more to se- cura both huppiness and virtue than any otber means we know of. " How well one can read the signs of a honsé- hold that is ruled by love, and kept up to_tho mark by recognition and ebcoursgement ! There iy moral oxygen, Bpiritual sunshine, in the whole atmosphere ; and souls rre stimulated, not re- pressed,—heartene@ up, and not bounded down. The children are free and unconstrained, and do- Joid of that craven terror so painful to 8co in the weaker ; thp Borvants move easily, spesk paturally, and look as if they are at home,—that is, in a place whers they aroloved, msdemuchof, and the good that is in them recognized. Thers is no sense of ropression in such a house,—all of encoursgement; and tho vice of fault-find- ing for its own eako i not known. _Every ono Las room to grow, power to expand ; and this carefal ixture of the good and the noble of it- sell atrophiea evil tendencies, as the vigoréus growth of forest-trees chokes out forever the Ecmiciaus weeds which in the beginning might ave choked thom. Almost all the best things in life have been done by LOVE EXTRA TO LAW; but it will be a profitable roturn if we receiro wno more than the bare money-payment for tho graco we oursclves give beyond the strict covenant. -Grant that we aze but unprofitable servants at tho best ; till, the endeavor to reduce the gross amount 'of any upprofitablencss counts some- thing in our favor, and deserves to bo scored to the good for us. But some peoplo aro so_des- perately afraid of spoiling those who work for them, they keep off all commendation a8 3 weak- ness, s danger, if not & sin. They think that avery word of praise will bo uscd ageinst them as a basis for exacting better terms; 2a0d, the Tower they can best you down in your own sclf-esteem, the more good they imagine themselves to be. They maintain that praise makes people presumptious and conceited, and ihey make no distinction between injudicions flatiory—praise given where there has been no effort, consequently no merit—and that appro- bation which is the hearty recognition of a dosire to do well. These people, therefore, GET ONLY WHAT THEY BARGAIN FOR ; the strict letter of the law is kept, but no wide interpretation _given beyond; tho stipu- lsted work is_domo; tho hours agread on sre hbopestly cmployed; but of all those little extra touches which give that value which love alone can gise to work, there®is not one; and, if another half-hour would vender porfect what is now only passable, it is not ver. g‘wny should they, the workers, toil bevond their ‘terms of their covenant,—thoy think,— when no effort will be recognized, and all extra will be taken as g0 much ‘due and in the bond? Tiuman pataro has need of praise_and love. It may be & weakness, and the ttern Roman princi- Pl of duty-doing for duty’s sake is a saperior state of things; but it is not common. Per- haps it ought to be; but we have to doal with tho world aswe find it, s0d make the beat of the materisl at hand ; and it strikes me that the severity which forbeara to praise a ‘man for doing his duty, or & trifle beyond, 13 LESS WISE AND LESS KUMANE than the Christian grace which commends _the profirable sersant with effusion, and beatifies Tore than one phaso of well-doing. : Tite fact is, this question of praise or sileca toward good-endeavor_is one of tho thousand manifestations of selfishuess or unselfishness. Belfiab folk think you never do emough for them, whatover it may bo ; it ‘is_only your duty | and their due ; do we thank the baker, when we buy hisbread, becansobe has baked it properly, or tho shoeblack when he rubs our boots into & thine? Why then you, though you have put Jour heart into the work, and wroaght with zeal 38 woll as with more legal honesty? An! but this policy is & bad one! No man works so well under this kind of grudgiog reserve as when he is met with & more generous appreciation, and a ory large percentige indeed will give an bundance of extra endeavor if they aro but warmed and stimulated by the praise that is by recognition. And what is true iu the mare out- side Lifo is eminently &0 of . THE HOME. . A vast amount of happiness can.be given and un- happiness spared, if home-companions would but understandsnd scknowledge wnen endeavors aro made to please, to content, to satisfy. To take eversthing for granted, and to give no_ scknowl- edgement becsuse feeling no obligation, when offorts are made to please, to content, to satisfy ; _muumfiflnxtgtmted. and to give acknowledgment becaube feeling no _obligation, when efforts are mado to render eorvice besond the law and set thinga square for our benefit, is to cut off one of the main sources of home-hap- piness. It is like shutting out the sun from the green-house, and then wondering why the plants do not flo} ASD IT COSTSE0 LITTLE! Tho kind word, the approving emile, _the gracious criticisms, evidence at least that things are not lost on the attention. Love lightens the Iife as nothizg elso can. v I beliove tbat balf of the honseholds in our country may be made smiling,remembering that work to please desarves to be paid ‘with praise. HENRY BRUSKEVITZ. —_——— CLERKS AND EMPLOYERS. To the Editor of The Chicago Tribune : Stn: Tho relations sustained by clorks to their employers aro a sourca of many troubles, and occasion ubpleasant thoughts, and often- times restlt in mutual and reciprocal hatred. In many departments of business the componsa- tion allowed to clerks is 8o small that the sons of wealthy men have s . MONOPOLY OF THE PLACES. which operates unfavorably in two wiys: it drives away alargo and meritorious class of young men, while it introduces another, who, from thoe vory nature of the case, cannot take B0 active an interest 2s those whom want and necessity urge forward. The influence of these rich clerks in situations where little or no compensation is allowed is very pernicions in inducing habits of extravagance, inattention to business, and of sabstituting the swell maonors and flash sppearance of the-roue for the gentle- manly bearing and manly dignity of the good citizen. In branches of trade where a com- pensation is allowed, it is generally too small for the interests of both parties. 'ENLIOHTENED SBELFISUNESS would seom to dictate & reform in this matter. ‘Wo aro prowerbial forour thrift, and have a char- acte for knowing what investments will produce tho best dividends; and I submit, whether an investment in the shape of increased ealaries wonld not exhibit ss largo returns as any stock Xnown to the Board of Brokers. Let any of our Chicago merchants reflect how large a portibn of the otails of bis busineds is in the hands of clerks, and how powerful an agency they exert in his affairs,—how often heis the victim of their negligence, incompeteucy, or distoncsty,—and he will perceive tho great ne- cessity for care in the sclection ; and may wo not liope a careful investigation of tho subjoct will lead him most cheerfully to pay ASPLE REMUNERATION for services rendered? For a poorly-paid, dis- pirited clerk is not g0 valuablo as ona_whotakes B0 active interest in his employer's affairs, and goes to his business in oarncst. i "A boy whoso existenco is an experiment, show- ing the lowest point at which body and soul can be prevented from digsolving their paintul con- nection, ia as far from being the living intelli- gonce Lio was created for, as_aro the joded aud broken-spirited animals wo seo carted about in caravan-cages below their brothren of the bound- less forest. It will always be found the truest policy to practice tho inspired precept, * The aborer is worthy of his hire.” Thero is a strango WANT OF CONFIDENCE oxhibited in the intercourse between merchants and their clorks. Too frequently their conver- pation resembles what may be termed cross- examination. Confidence begets confidence. No merchant of_our large city, who possesses tho least” spark of learning and talent, ia above learning many important points of intelligence, respecting both men and business, from his vonngmen. Each of tho parties move in a dif- ferent circle ; and the clork, from the oature of Lis compauions, has many opportunities of ob- taining valuable information equal to that which his master enjoys. ‘What would be gaid of an officer or military commander, and what would be his success and fate, did he not avail himeelf of all the talent and diversity of chZtacter in his gubordinate bfticers? And should a merchant lose all the advantages to bo obtained from an activo exer- cise of all the talents and means of information his clerks possess ? 3 ‘Anothor evil, which is more prevalent than formerly, 18 TIE FALSE HOPES often held out to young men to induce a sacri- fico of present good upon tho promise of future advancoment,—an advancement. which is alwaya foture and ideal. What greater crime can o committed against socicty than to coolly cal- culato how far one can speculate_upon the ris- inghopes of o young man, by basely holding before him a delusion, which, when exposed, will gend him forth to the world & disappointed man, the victim of generous confidence, of human cupidity, and the foulest wrongs. What 13 life Worth when honor is gone? _And who ehall re- pair the ruin to that mind, cheeted of its fond- est prospeots, and allured to_sacrifice ita timo in vainly chasing a bubble, which bursta ere the hend could grasp its emptiness? et no young man for one moment imagine, howover, that, because his manhood is not acknowledged, and his better nature and nobler impulsss are not thus appealed to, thers is, on his part, any relax- ation of tho 5 MIGIEST MOBAL OBLIGATION to do everything in his power to advance the in- terest of his cmployer. No neglect or remiss- nesa of the emplover can obliterate hia claims to all the ability and force of character possessed by the young man. Bis duty is none tho less plain because bis life and enjoyments form no portion of the thoughts, and engage no atten- tion of the man who claims his time and talents. Two wrongs will not make one right. And the young man whose daily actions and every movement aro regulated by any such narrow and groveling standard fails in the'duty he owes to another aud to himself. Should negligence and . heedlessness becomo & habit, the injury to the employer is_transient and tomporaty; whilo the ovils of which they are the prolific parents will follow their unforta- Date victim through life, and prove a curse, from whose withering mfluence he will never be dis- enthralled. The lessons of the past, and the united voices of reason and revelation, urge_the young man forward to his duty in every relation of life. By the constaut excreise of fidelity, he will RISE BUPEEIOR TO THE OBSTACLES which seem to arrest Lis progress ; and, by serv- g others, be will confer lasting benefit upon himself. Enlightened self-interest will press him onward in the path which duty and obliga- tion mark out, and ho will show the world, and experience himself, the wisdom which dictated to & Bon the wise counsel : 3 “To thine own self bo true; And it must follow, aa the night the dsy, Thon canst not then be falsc to any man. . C.J.B Some of Bismarck’s Maxims, Taken from Hiis Parliamentary Speeches. When pusbed to extremes, I profer my slrt to my coat.—Jan, 22, 1864. A question of right can bo settled only with tlg& bayonet in our European quarrels.—Jan. 22, Partics and castes are mutablo—they perish, and new ones arise.—Jgn. 22, 1864, The Kings of Prussia have never been pre- eminently the Kings of the rich.—Feb. 15, 1865. ‘Whoever makes the most promises is apt to carry the election.—June, 1, 1865. ‘All clazses do a little smuggling, especially the women.—June 1, 1865. A great country cannot bo governed by parti- sans.—Jan. 15, 1867, Put Germany into the saddle and you will find that she knows how to ride.—23arch 11. 1867. Governments are like womon—the youngest please the most.—Dec. 9, 1868. Itisnot _possiblo to Lasten the ripening of {gé;’t by holding & lamp underneath.—dpril 16, Centralization is tyranny, more or lees.—April 16, 1869. Whoever carries the money-bag is the people’s master.—April 26, 1369. . Every country knows that peace and security "if ‘_Lu rttl;a sxro§d.—.vay 22, 1869. erty isa luxi which not every one can afford.—May 22, T8, 2 People are o great deal more 1avish when they pay ont of 3 common treasury_than when they pay out of their own pockets.—Jan. 2, 1871. Feeding at Washington Parties. Washington Correspondence of the Independent. At 12 o'clock the doors of the supper-room are opened, and then the Jam beggars description. You may take your choice, to be puehed or to push, and in either case to ses plates of oyaters, ialads, and creams, with threatening spoons apd forks, bristling through mid-air, glancing by ‘Four noee, or swimming down your back. 1 was Dover sure that we werenot s _civilized people tiil I contemplated my compatriota in the Wash- ington supper rcom of a ‘festive occasion.” There I have seen dignitaries whom the public believe to have enough to eat at home puebing toward a supper-table as & cannibsl might to his feast; and Iadies ronowned as ** delicate,” with piled-up plates of pickies, salads, fraits, and creama, cramming at a rate that wonld make & healthy woman aick abed fora week. A QUEEN’'S ADVENTURE. From Lippincot’s Mugazine, One rainy ovening toward the close of April, 1791, a ponderous old traveling coach toiled wearily up the hill the summit of which is crowmed by the anciont town of Jougne, on the road between Lons-les-Saulniers and Bessncon, the eapital of the Province of Franche-Comte. There were two women in the vehiele ; one, tall, handsore, and exceddingly elegant, occupied the seat facing the horses ; the other, who satop- posite to her, was a young person of sprightly countenance, whose simple costume and deferen- tial manrier at onco annonnced her to bo eithera waiting-maid oradame de compsgnie. From timo to time one or the other of tho two travelers would thrust herhead out of the carriage window to urge on tho postilion or look back down the rond, apparently to se WUETHEB ANY ONE WERL FOLLOWING. Notwithstanding the entreaties of the ladies, ard his own best endeavors, Maitre Jacques, the postilion, failod miserably ip his attempts to in- duce his two heavy Flemish horses to get into & trot, let alone a gallop. Tho road wasso bad, the rain go blinding, the ruts so many, tho mud 80 decp, that the best tho poor bessts coutd do in response to their master's oaths and loud cracks of tho whip Was to give an occasional jerk forward or a stumble, and then resume their Wonted funereal paco. “Heaven help us, Bussnne! This dreadfal journey will mever cnd; wo cannot possibly Teach Besancon to-night,* observed the lady who sat with her faco to tho horses. * on Diea! how I wish wo were well over it and safo I “ Madame i8 too nervous ; that gentloman on horseback wo have scon at the last throo sta- tions, and who has followed us, has frightencd her. Bolieveme, 1 am sure heisnospy; be is too nice-looking for that. I am persuaded bhe is only fascinated by madame's chirms, and hay not recognized her. Ob, ke is no moro a sang- calotte than I am.” ©It_matters very littlo what you think about bim: 1 havo my foars, aud my roasons for having them. Put your Liead out once more, and see 1f he be still in sight.” Sueanne did zs sho was bid, and presently shutting down the window as quick au she conld, to prevent the rain from pouring in, gave ber mistress the resssuring news tiat not only had the obnoxious stranger disappeared, but also that THE GATES OF JOUGNE wore close at band; *And, madame, through a break in the clouds I saw tho mouutains of Switzerland, 50 you sco we are approaching the frontier.” s “That is well. o will stop for supper hero at the Lion '0r, and then hasten on to Besan- con this vory night,” said her mistress. In a few momonts more the carriage rumbled throngt: the narrow streats of Jougne, and pres- ently stopped under the porle-cochereof the hotel of the Golden Lion. Wil the lacies got down ?" eaid the jolly inn- keeper a8 he stood with the half-opened car- risge-door in ono hand and Lis cap in the other, bowing with extrs civility to his two new guests, and dehgihted at the prospect of their being de- tained all night puder Lis roof, for travelers had become vory rara in those troubled times. “*Will tho Iadies get down ? Supper will bo resdy at & moment’s notice.” 3 “ Certainly, we want if at once, and lot it be a good, substantial meal, for, I can assure you, we are ruroly hungry,” answered tho tall lady, a8 sho jumped out, sud, turning to the postilion, inguired if it wero possible to reach Besaucon before midnight. ~ PEBFECTLY TMPOSSIDLE, MADAME ; the roads aro 1n s shocking state. Wo should ouly run the risk of a breixdown half-way.” *“And that would Do intolerable. Al- lons! Bussone, get down end briug in with you all tho ehawle, pillows, and night-bags you can find, for, miuco wo must elecp here, we may as well make ourselves at homo.” ‘Susaune, loaded with rngssnd satchels, fol- lowed her mistross into the house, and the two travelers, emerging from the siado of tho hall, entered tho brightly-illuminated dining-room. Afire crackled cheerily on tho hearth, and the large apartment, with its manj little tables cov- ercd with suow-whito cloths and shizing glass, looked guite cosy. The ladies, tsking off their \wraps, seated themselves by the fire, and pres- ently the landlady drew in front of them s table on which she placed two smoking bowls of ex- cellent broth. . The bright light of the fire threw its cheerful glare on the countenance of the tall Iady, and showed her to possess such rare and stately beauty that the worthy landlady, on returning to tho Eitchen, proclaimed jo Ler satellites thab sho never before had seen’so queely a personage. “ C'est une veriladle reine SHE'S A PERFECT QUEEN). . T'll warrant 8Qo’s some fine court Marchioness on Lier way over the frontier,” said she; *and, poor soul! I'would bo tho last to prevent her Hight.” Indeed, the Ilady justified these en- comiums, Her figure was gracoful and commanding, her features regular, her eyes bright and vivacious. Her hair, in, which still lingored traces of powder, was high up over her ample forchead, whilst one heavy curl hung down on her shoulder. Her comple: ion was singularly brillisat, and, varying con- stantly on the least emotion, gave the lie to thoso of her enemies who declared she used paint. Tuo only dofect that could be possibly found with g otherwise perfect face was that the lower lip, slightly too thick, protruded s little besond $ho upper one, as is frequently observed in por- traits of tho Bovereigns of THE HOUSE OF ATUSTRIA. Her costume was simple, consisting of 3 gray potticoat and a flowered cbintz overskirt, made In the fashion recootly so popular and styled “Dolly Varden.” Her attendant, whom she calied Susanne, was 8 protty aud unpretending oung woman belonging to the vivacious class of French serving-maids immortalized by Molicre aod Beanmarchais as soubretics. The two travelers had scarcely tasted their first spoonful of soup when the doors of tho apartment were thrown open, and a fonctionnaire of the Provixionary Government,wearing his tri- cotored scarf, entered. Btriding up to the table st which the twoladies wero scated, ho drew from his pocket a lettor, and fixing his eyes with avid iotereston the tall lady, medc a mental comparison between her countenance and that of some one described in the document he held in bis hand. *! WHAT IS YOUR NAME, CITOYENNE 2" asked ho euddenly in & tono of authority. “fay I first ask, sir, who it is_I sball have bad'the honor of apswering when I do give my name?” roturned the lady, who, although she Liad become cchdingl‘v{ pale, rotained her self- possession in a remarksble manner; for it was 10 joko for a woman of position to fall into tho hauds of fonctionnaires in those days. ] am thoe Mayor of Jougne.” ¢ In that case, M. le Maire, - 1 A1 MADAXE DE PRYNE." #Have you no papers about you—no pass- port ?" . “Mon Dieu! Yes—no;that is, of course I have, but in my trunk,” answered the lady. Ve aro only going to Besancon. This is my rmaid Suganne ; we are two women traveling on business. 1 have an sn%lfiumunb at Beaancon ; and really, M. lo Maire, I bad no ides that pass: ports wers necessary whon traveling in France.” + You said that you had one in your boz. Very well, Madum do Pryne, allow me to see fhis passport.” ' Willingly! Call in your mon, and ot them bring my largest trunk ; all my pspers aro in bk iven and the box opened. ottom of all.” ead Madame de Pryne, rising as if to searci for it herself. “1; is useless your trombling _yourself, citoyenne, Sce? look at these grand traina: these alone suffice to prove that JOU BELONG TO THE COURT, and intend emigrating into Switzerland,” cried the Mayor, a8 be threw out of the box on to the tabla several magniticent robes of velvet, one of which was lined with ermine. *“"And here—here my euspicions sro more than coutirmed, Ab! ah! Madame de Prynel—that is your name, 18 it ?—and yon wear a crown, do you:" exclaimed the Mayor, as he suddenly roso from his inspec- tion of the box's contents, brandishing triumph- autly in one hand a crown siuddod with largo gemw, and in the other & scoptre. ‘““Ahl ahi” 1zughed be exaltingly, **Madame de Pryne! So you were going over the frontier with the erown- Jowels of ¥ranca? I know who you are.” \Who 2" asked Madamo de Pryne, apalo a8 & sheet. . “Youare MARIE ANTOINETTE OF ATSTRIA, sometime Queen of France.” I3 the Queen expectod to pasa thia way in ner fight 2" 3 is, and you kmow that better than “The order was 47t is st the *‘She apyone. Inthe name of France and the law I arrest you.” “Vithout any further proofs ?"” ¢ Certainly : I do not require them.” “Will you not at least look at my pass- port " “Bah! a borrowed passportl” said the Mayor inan impatient tone. “You had better give ourself up, madame, without any further ado. will be for the best.” Then, sir,” the lady aoswered, rising majes- tically from her seat and assuming an imperial attitude, 5 41 A3 TIE QUEEY Tt would bo dificult to imagine a more nobla figuro than that of tho uafortunato Princess as sho spoke these four words. Seeing that Su- sanue was impationtly about to interrupt ber, sho silenced her by an imperative gosture, and then reseated horself with much dignity in her chair. Bo queenly did she appear at this entical moment of her existenco, that, staunch Repub- lican 28 he was, the Mayor of Jougne forgot all sbout egalite, bowed lowly before his fallen sov- ereign and retired ot once to give the necessary orders for Her Majesty's deteution and to_an- nounce the news of her eapture to his fellow- citizens. A few moments after bis exmt two gendarmes wore sent to mount guard at the doors of the saloon, and the unfortunate Queen, concluding & fow words of whispered conver- sation with Susanre, threw herself on her knees and prayod carnestly for Divine sssistance. In less than an hour the Mayor returned, accom- panied by a dozen oreo of the mombers of the municipality. They found tho Qucen calm, aad oven cheerful, Sho acknowledged thoir defer- ential manner toward her with regal grace, and when informed that the upper floor of the hotel was placed at her service until farther instructions were received from Pariy, followed them thither with so quick and even gay s atep that sevoral of them after- ward remembered 1t as an instanco of unusual self-command. When once the Queen was safo and guards Encod b her door, tho Mayor of Jounge gave imself up to a transport of revolutionary joy: % He had the Queen of Franco under lock and koy. Ophim, beforo three days were over, would be fixed THE EYES OF ALL TIV: WOBLD. ‘His name wonld descend to posterity, and live forover in the annals of of his county. Having nssembled his fellow-function- aries in the saloon of the inn, he mado thea a patriotic speech, in ‘which he invoked the spirits of DBrutus and Cato, and sound up 3{ proposing that the * patriots of Jougue should form themselvea into s bat- talion of true republicans, and, placing Mario Antoinotte of Austria in thoir centro, lead that archi-treitress before the national tnibunal. Pos- sessed aa they were of ber crown, sceptre, globo, 2and royal mantle, they could carry thege emblema of fallen despotism in their triumphal proces- sion, and offer them 29 & holocaust on the altar of liberty.” Anaddress to the National Assembly, statiog their intention and giving the most minute de- tails of the Queen's arrest, was forthwith written ont and eigmed by the entire conclave, and dis- patched immedisately to the capital. To thin jet- tor was added A PRIVATE OSE FROM THE QUEEN - hersolf, but 5o artfully sealed that do what they could it wes impossible for any ono of them to read a singlo word of its contents. Having dis- misscd tho council, the Magor went once more to tho Queen, to_inform her of what had been dotermined. ' Being a kind-hearted man, how- ever, he spared her the knowledge of the man- 1o in which he proposed to condact Ler back to Paris. Whilst ho was conversing with Her Majesty, a gendarme hurrieclv entered the chamber in astate of great excitement: “MM. le Maire! M. lo Maire! we have arrested POLIGNAC OB LAMBDALLE!" ¢ Ah," exclaimed the Qneen, ‘it is thatyoung man.” “\Vhat youngman ?" inquired the Mayor. “A gentiemen who followed our coach, that is all, auswered she, in_Bomo confasion, eeeing that #he had evidently committed an impradence by this last observation. “Let him be bronght up_hero immediately,” commanded the Mayor ; and in a fow moments » tall and remarkably handsome young man was dragged into the spartment by two guards. His clothics were cripping wet, ho had lost his hat, and Lis soiled cloak dragged on the ground be- 1T IS THE SAME,” whispered Susanne, **perhaps hé mey help us.” +¢ Please God !" murmured tho Queen. No sooner was this young gentleman dis- engaged from the hands of Lis captors than, throwing himsolf on his knees, hio raised ber hand to his lips: “Pardon me, madame. Had 1 but suspected it was the Queen of France to Whom I presumed to raise my eyes, I'would havo Qied rather than have 8o far forgotten what was duo Lo my sovereign, especially in her hour of trouble. Iam a gentleman by birth, the Count de Maillettes. Unaware of Your Majesty's true rank, I followed yourcarriage, struck by your sur- passing beanty and enolaved by its power, hop- ing through porsistenco to be favored with ono glance of pity, if not of love. Now that I recog- nizemy error, &3 Your Majesty's most humble servant and subject, my lifo is at your sorvico, and I crave only your gracious pardon.” “ Ob. you have it Connt : I grant it willingly, and only see in your conduct,” answered the Quoen emiling, but with an evident meaning, for sho fixed Lier keen oyes on the knoeling gen- tleman in & manoer that forbade his answering 1 geo, ¢ir, in your conduct only a proof of your desire to serve AN UNFORTGNATE WOMAN AND A FALLEY QUEEN.” 4Tt is well,” broke in the Mayor. *‘Notwith- standing all'appenrances to the contrary, this young man evidently forms a part of your cor- tego, madamo. Heisarrested, and hall sharo your apartmonts. Tho coamber at tho end of “the corridor, sir, ia yours. You have, however, tho right of free accoss to the Queen whenaver sho dosires your presence. esdames, I wish you s very good-night ! Citoyen, bon soir ! and bow- ingh civilly tho good Msayor withdrow for the night. 5 When the door was closed on the Mayor the Count was about to withdraw also, but the Queen provonted his doing 8o, entreating him_to re- Inain and partake of supper with her, which waa presently served. During this meal the Queen BECAXE EXCEEDINGLY LIVELY. and tho merry laughter of the impnsoned sov- ereign and her new fricnd being heard out- wide- in the corridor, lod tho guards when changed to snnounce to the public *that Fler Majesty was_a sivgularly fearless woman, Tor, notwithstanding the danger 6o was in, she Iaughed liko a true daughter of Momus, and was baving a fino timo of it with (the * Prince,’ who was evidontly her lover.” R 1t is unnecessary to tell how the imprisoned Queen passed her time in her confinement at the Lion @'0Or. We are compelled, howaver, to re- cord that bor intimacy with’ the Count became 4o great that once tho guard at the door, spying through the koyhole, actuslly eaw him K188 NER before retiring for the night. 3 The sixth and last day of her captivity st length arrived. The answer from the National Assembly reached Jougne toward Doon, and the Queen was at breakfast with the Count and Busanne ‘when the Masor entered her presence, followed by the wholo municipality aod soveral guards. The 0od Mayor was flushed with excitement, and in gifl hand he beld the as yet unsealed document. Arranging sll bis _colletgues according to_their various ofiicial grades in a semi-circlo arcund him, he addressed tho Queen, who rose to hear Dim, with & stately and .majestic air: ** Murie Antoinette of Austria, we have this morning re- ceived the following answer from the Govorn- ment of Paris, and hesten to commaunicate to you its contents.” Here tho worthy Aa; istrato Jrtoko tho seals and read: * Citizen Mayor—Marie Antoinette is etill in Paris, hma mover left it Let Made: and moisello Ssinval, ACTRESS OF THE THEATRE FRANCAIS, pass on without hindrance to Beaancon, whers she has an engagement.” Had the earth opened at his fect the Masor of Jougno could mot have looked more utterly dumbfounded. *So yon have played us a trick, bave you, Medemoiselle Bainval 2" cried bs, fari- ously. SE: {Iy dear M.le Maire, allow me to remark,” answered the quondam Queen, ‘‘that it is you who have played mea trick. Had you but ex- amined my passport, a3 I told you, you would bave found that, although I have been Queen of Tyre, Sidonia, Greece, Jerusalem, Rome, 20d Menopotamia, I have never, up to the present time, laid claim to the throzo of France, even for a singie night. You, however, hiave forced me to play a part which does nob belong to mo for six days and nighta in succes- sion, and . AN IRRSOME ROLE ithas proved. Confees, now, that it is motmy fault if you have mistaken the crown snd sceptre of Melpomene for that of Gaul Bat, since I am free to proceed to Besaucon, perhaps you il order my carrizge to the door, for a3 soon 23 I have finished my breskfast I intend to bo oft. Bon jour, messiours!” added she, bowing 20 the mortificd council aa it witbdrew. Sud- denly recollecting herself, she eriod out, Eb, Countgotoos” . mt'y’legelha de\sfl it ho likes,” answered the Mayor suappishly as be slammed the doar. ‘Mademoiselle Sainval turoed aracefully to the Count, and said, 83 a sweet emile illumined hér charming face, And you, my desr Connt, when Jouhave donojuaticototbatomelette. porhiapsyou will give me your arm and lead me down to the Soach. Oh how I wish that that poor Queen bad COfeed left Pasis whilst I was enacting her part, which I did in the hope that these people, believ- ihg the paste to bo s real dismond, vonld have l6ethe trae jewel pass! Poor, poor Queen ! ‘Allons, Snsannal gerved mo a8 sovereign of France; will soa not still continue to bo my Squire as Tragedy Queen?” The Count, bowing low, raised the {nir actrees” hand to lus lips. Thew, leaning on his arm, snd followed by hor faithful maid, Mademoiselle Saiuval swoptdown the staireaso to the carriage, in which tho Connt took his seas oppositd Susaune. R. Daver —_——— TO ANNIE. T've got a poor heazt, lovs, That Cupid's keen dars, love, ‘Has, cruel, pierced right thraugh and through, Tho' wise ones may presch it, And learned ones toach it, ‘Forever this poor heart the one thing will doz Golipg pitapat beating, *. Nofing time fleeting, 1t has slways the samo love, my dilrling, for you, When, often and often, T've sirove hard to soffen The arrow that pinned mo securely to thee, TYou bother znd tease me, Bewilder and pleaso me, "Il the kest of mankind with thy faults would szrea, Nigh driven to madness Twizt sadness and gladneas, A slave to thy charms I ever will ba, T'm happy one moment Yet, era love can foment, oliy dash Hopo to the ground,— Not a whit caring, With glances cosnaring, My heart in Lave's fofters socurely you've bound, And you toy 28 you capture, “Til my sonl, in 3 rapture, Still vows thea the dearsat and best to Le founad. Cricaco, Ja3xs LavALLIZ, HUMOR. A hollo mockery—An echo. —DPregsed for time—Egyptian mummies. —In tents excitement—Fanic in a circus. —A Iady in Washington was recently heard to obsorve, on taking up the moraing paper: ‘'L wonder if anybody has bean born that [ xnow.” —+1'm particularly uneasy on this point,” said the fly to the yonng gentleman who stuck bim on the end of a noedic. - —This i highly colored: *The lilaca are bud~ ding," eays a Wisconsin editor. **Yon lilac Ss- tan,"” rcu{\cndfl one of his readers. ‘“You violet tho'trath,” politely replies the cditor, and both are given over toblue dovils. —A rophomore says ho canaot undorstand how- any ono possessing what is generally known a8 & conscience can counterfeit a five- cont picco, and puton the back of it, *In God wo trust.” = —After asking your name in the Stato of Ar- kansas, the natives aro in the hahit of in- quiring, in a conidential tone, * Well, now, \\'ha‘t ;ms yer name aforo yer moved to these arts 2" —Alluding to the death of a citizen recently, the Danbury News romarks : *“With tho singls exception of twenty-threo years ago, when he took a fow lessons on a vioiin, his lifa kas been blamoless.” —Edith 0'Gorman is charged with belg a charlatan in petticoats. How shoulda Charlotte Ann be draped? —An Ohio woman riding on the cars with hsr boy said he was G, and when Billy spoke up and. declared he was 10, the good women drew him over her knee and had eatisfaction for tho half- fare she was oblized to pay. —Tho cometory pond is the most popular in this vicinity. Here, of a clear night, aud amid tho solemn momories which cluster about the epot, the amateur skater strikes on the back of his head, and ewears like s pirate.—Danbury News. —_A clorgyman being invited to open a Legis~ lature with prayer, offored the following ambic- uous petition : */3ay corruption and sin of oy~ ory form bo a far from _every member of this Legislature as Thou art.” —A boy was caught stealing chostnuts near s cemotery, What's your pame?” ‘:Troed,” blubbered the boy. = The frightened farmer d.mp&ed tho boy and fled. —How to make = lady stick out her little finger. ‘LLie best way of securing this effoct is toput on the finger in questicn & handsome diamond ring. —A Milwaikeo dry goods elork wears a ehin- gle under his shirt front to keep the wrinkles in subjection. —A jeweler Iabeled some diamonds in his win- dow 03 being as sparkling as tha tears of a young widow. —+Do you go to Sabbath-school, my lad?” Idndly asked & city missionary of a depraved Tittle Dubuque urchin. _** Nary,” answeted tho innocent child, “but ¥'ve got a fightin' cock that can walk over any bird in this town that wears gaffa.” Gloomy srd dissipated youth (who has dis- covered that life ia not worth having)—* I hops 1 shen't be alive after 30!” Unsympathetio elderly party—* Is there any particular necessity that yon should be alive 630 2” —First_swell — * Let's 8es — to-morrow's— What's t'day, byth'by ?” Second swell—* Tnes~ day, isn’t—or Mondsy?—was yest'dsy Sunday? Neo' mind (yawns)—my man'] be here presontis— pwecious sheewd fellow—'tell us like a shot !"— Punch. —Young lady—* Did you know Strausa ws§ dead ?” Becond ditto—"It is only the theo- logian, though.” Z-Says tho Milwaukee Senlinel: “ An cld Mil- waukes bummer, when ho read in yesterday's Sentinel that the women in Ohio aro emptying barrels of whisky into the guttors, pathotically excinimed, * What Lsppinesa to bo a0 Obio gut~ —Itis related that in a certain town in the northern part of Maino the peoplo wore holding a meeting, when the pastor remarked that if any present had relatives or friends in distant lands, pragers wonld bo offered in thoir behalf, No Booner was the sentonco complete than & simple- looking individual aroge and tbus addressed tho astor: “Iwould lie you to pray for m rother, Ilo went away two weeks ago, and haven't heard from him since. I don’t know jest whore he s, bat yon necd not pray below Bangor.” 4 —The Baron de X—— was a miser to} the ex- tremity of meauness, He wes at daggers drawn with his nephew, who was Lis heir, and more- over a spendthrift. Finding his end spprosch-~ ing, the Barcn called lus valot. * Here,” uaid bo, 4 aro ten sous ; go and buymea sheot of stamped paper. 1 with to make a will dwinher- iting my nephow.” * But, Morsieur, stampad papor is_now twelve sousa shoot.”. “ Twelvo sous! It ia too dear. 1 had ratherlet roy scoundrel of a nephow _inherit."—L'Ilustration. 2 Census Ofiicer— What ago, madam, shall { put down 2" Madam (after maturo reflection)— - \:}m Dhave you put down for tho lady over- head 2" —Simkins playfally remarked to his wife that he had four fools: beautifool, dutifool, youth- fool, and delightfool. *Poor me!" said she. ++1 Iiavo but one.” T —At = very snccessful sesnce in Cincinnati, the other night, » man buzst into tears when the 1nedium described very accurately & tall, blue- eyed spirit standing by him, with light sido- whiskers and his hair parted 1n the middio. * Do ou know him #" inquired & man 3¢ his side ina sympathetic whisper. *Kuow him? I guces 1 do," replied the unbappy man, wiping his exes. “fo was engaged to my wife. 1f ho hado't died he would have been ber husband instoud of mo. Ob, George, George!” ho murmared, iz & voice choked with emotiop, * why did yor peg oui?” o —Yesterday the littlo son of oo of our -eiti- Zzeos, whilo playing with lus sister, s bright awoot childof 5 sumsmers, got hold of his fatber's grun, which had been left caralessly standicg in flo kitchen by tho thoughtless parent, painted the gun at Lia playmate, and, sayiog Jjokizgly, T kill you!” puliod tho trigger. \¥hat must havo been that boy's feelings w. an he found that ho had lied, that The gun was mot losded, and that his inuocent littlo sister had Inocked & por- tion of his noso off with s stick of wood.—Aflis- souri Brunswick Plagiarism, ‘The Oswego Tirnes has 3 good story to tell, in connection with the litoracy piracy in which the students in our colleges and scademies indalge. Tho late D, P._ Page, the first Principal of tha ‘Albany Stat Normal School, remarks tho fol- jowing purport: Ho said that o few years provi- ons, while traveling in_3lassachusetis, his wife, 2t 2 hotol, found an article in a magazice, whicia impressed her 8o favorably that sbo coplad it into ber scrap-book. Ha read it at the time, and had not thought of it since until the evening before, when the samo article bad been handed to bim by one of the stadents, for “correction,™ 18 a0 original composition. He sincerely regrot- ted that among young gentlemen and ladies, 18- piricg to the honorablo position of tescliers, even one should be found who would do wo_dis- honorsole & thing a8 to try to paas of, a8 bhis o her own, the productions of apother, snd bhis fret impuiso was to ¢xposa the frand in open school. ~But ho presumed it was the firsc of the kind that had occurred in that institution, aud as thero might be extenuating circumstances, ho bad concluded to forgive the offender, provided that individual sbould call at his room withio thros days, confess the fanlt, and promise not to repeat it. - In this statemont 3lr. Pago. gav) no intimation 25 to the charactor of tha “'picca, or the perpetuality of the offender, and, b=foro the expiration of the three dsys, more than two- thirda of the studcats hed called upon bim, ac- knowledged the offense, and apologized. * nd, said be, whilo relating the circumstances, *the Faht one did not como 2t all” Thy story noeds no comments, and embodies its ovn come let us go. Coust, you havo | clnsions.