Bemidji Daily Pioneer Newspaper, September 2, 1910, Page 11

Jungle Housekeeping. The negro housewife in the West Indian jungle finds housekeeping very <easy. Fruit and vegetables grow wild all about the hut and the river abounds with fish. On wash day all she has to do is to pick a few of the berries of the soap berry free, take her clothes to the river and use the berries as she would use ord ry soap. Even her 1z pots grow on the trees, the 1sh cut in halves being used for this purposc. Calabashes are used also for bowls, busins and jugs for carrying water from the river. while the small ones make excellent cups. In the afternoon. when she is ready for her cup of tea. the negress picks half a dozen leaves from the lime bush growing at her door. boils them, squeezes the juice from a sugar cane for sweetening and the cocoanut sup- plies the milk. Thus she has a deli- cfous cup of tea without depending on the grocer for it. She makes the mats for her floor out of the dried leaves of the banana, plaited and sewed togeth- er as the old country people in this country make their rag mats. Not For Himself. “It does me good to see a pompous man get h said a stockbroker. 1 have a friend who just about believes the Lord created the earth in seven days for his especial benefit. He has a fine home on Long Island. with a retinue of servants, but his wife is a semi-invalid. and it falls to the lot of Mr. Pompous to execute various com- missions for her in the city. The other -day she asked him to stop at a cloth- ing store and get a couple of white duck jackets for the butler. I hap- pened to be with him when he entered the store. Striding majestically up to a sallow little esman, he said, with h impressive dignity: *“*T wish to purchase a couple of white waiter's coats.’ “‘Yes * said the little salesman “What size do you wear? “Mr. Pompouns got red in the face spluttered and gurgled, and then as it fearing to trust himself to speech turn ed on his heel and strode from the place. e left me at the next cornes -and has avoided me ever since.”—New York Sun. An Experience at Hull House. Even death itself sometimes fails to bring the dignity and serenity which one would fain associate with old age. 1 recall the dying hour of one old Scotchwoman whose long struggle to “keep respectable” had so embittered her that her last words were gibes for those who were trying to minister to her. *“So you came in yourself this morning, did you? You only sent things yesterday. I guess you knew when the doctor was coming. Don’t try to warm my feet with anything but that old jacket that I've got there; it belonged to my boy who was drowned at sea nigh thirty years ago, but it's warmer yet with human feelings than any of your confounded charity bot water bottles.” Suddenly the harsh gasping voice was stilled in death, and 1 awaited the doctor’s coming, shaken and borrified.—Jane Addams in Amer- ican Magazine. Fear. Fear causes more disease than do microbes, more deaths than famine, more failures than panics. It costs more than war, is always a failure and is never necessary, said a medical man. Fear weaken’s the heart’s action, in- duces congestion, invites indigestion, produces poison through decomposing foods and is thus the mother of auto- soisoning. which either directly causes v greatly aids in the production of uite 90 per cent of all our diseases. DOING THEIR DUTY Seres of Bemidji Readers Are Learning the Duty of the Kidneys. ‘o filter the blood is the kidneys’ dut, ‘Vhen they fail to do this the kid- neyare sick. Bckache and many kidney ills follg; Ulnary trouble, diabetes. Doais Kidnedy Pills cure them all. Beiidji people endorse our claim. Frak Engels, 415 Minnesota Ave., Bemidi, Minn., says: I have no hesitajon in publicly recommending Doan’Kidney Pills, as I am con- fident hat my testimonial will be the mens of bringing relief to other sufferetl. There was a dull ache in the smll of my back for many months My kidneys were much disorded, the secretiuns being un- naturalind at times there was a great dgl of soreness across my loins, |t last I decided to try Doan’s :iduey Pills and procured a box at te Owl Drug Store. I be- gan usin them carefully as directed and sooithe pain disappeared, to- gether wh other symptoms of kid- ney troute,” For s@ by all dealers. Price 50 cents. Fster-Milburn Co., Buffalo New Yor, sole agents for the United Sttes. hi e ————— Many Uses of Sand. The sands of the sea are singularly useful. They are of primary impor- tance in glassmaking. They have an important place in warfare, as a bank of sand twenty inches thick is proof against modern rifle shots. The elec- trical properties of sand show that it has positive electricity, although a rod of silica, the chief constituent of sand, is negative. The singular drying effect which oc- curs when a stretch of wet sand is pressed by the foot is due entirely to an alteration in the piling of the sand grains, Normally the grains are close together, bLut abnormal piling Is brought about by pressure of the foot, the space between the edges of the | grains being enlarged and the water drained away. If the pressure of the { foot is coutinued the sand becomes wetter than ever, the partial vacuum quickly bringing water from the sur- i rounding sand 1o quicksand the moving character is thought to be due to the imprison- ment between the grains of gases from orgunic mwatter.--Chicago Tribune Caught. A shopwalker in a large business, noted for his severity to the assistacts under him, one day stepped up to a counter from which a ladylike person had just left unserved. “You let that lady leave without wmaking any purchase?’ he asked an- grily of the meek looking young man responsible for the handkerchief de- partment sales. e “Yes, sir. ["— “And she was at your counter fully ten minutes?” “Doubtless: but, then, you see”— “Exactly. I saw that, in spite of all the questions she put to you, you rare- ly answered her and never attempted to get what she wanted.” “Well, but”"— “You need not make any excuse. I shall report you for carelessness.” “Well, I hadn’t what she wanted?” “What was that?” “Five shillings. She was canvass- ing for subscriptions to an encyclope- dia.”"—London Globe. An Aquatic Tragedy. When visitors came, Bobby was often turned out of his room and into the garret for a night or two. He did not object to this., but he felt that it endangered certain cherished posses- sions. When his uncle, the clergy- man, arrived unexpectedly one night Bobby was transferred to his garret quarters in haste and with small cere- mony, and neglected to take any pre- cautions to guard his treasures. “T have to thank the thoughtful per- son who placed a glass of water on the table near the bed last night,” said the clergyman the next morning. *I awoke in the night and found it re- freshing—most refreshing.” “Oh!” said Bobby, in a tone of sor- row and reproach. "“You've drinked up my nice new 'quarium, and all”— But here Bobby's revelation was sup- pressed by his wmother.—Youth's Com- panion.: Who Got the Baby? Once upon a time a crocodile stole a baby and was about to make a dinner of it. ‘The frantic mother begged so piteously for the child that the croco- dile said: “Tell me one truth and you shall have your baby again.” The mother replied, “You will not give him back to me.” “Then.” said the crocodile, “by our agreement I shall keep him, for if you have told the truth I am oot going to give him back, and if it is a lie I have also won." But the mother said, “If I told you the truth you are bound by your prom- Ise, and if it is not the truth it will not be a lie until you have given me my child.” Who got the baby? No Sense of Proportion. The young man who had spent his efforts for several years without re- sult in studying art was talking with his practical uncle, who had patiently paid the bills. “Of course,” said the young artist, “I know I haven’t made much of a go of it, but I don’t think you ought to ad- vise me to try something else. You know it's best to put all your eggs in one basket and watch that basket.” “Um! That may be, Charlie; but did you ever think how foolish it is to put so many baskets around one ban- tam, egg”" Applied History. First Professor—My dear colleague, I'm a little puzzled. When did the first Peloponnesian war begin? Sec- ond Professor—B. C. 431. First Pro- fessor—Quite right, quite right. That is the number of my doctor’s tele- phone. I was to call him up and tell bim my wife is sick.—Exchange. Your Own Misfortunes. Bear your own misfortunes with half the resignation that you hear other people’s and you will be happy. It is 80 easy to tell other people how to be heroic and so difficult to be courageous ourselves, A Slight Change. Slight changes sometimes make a great difference. “Dinner for nothing,” would be agreeable, for instance; not €0, “Nothing for dinner.” His Wish. Tom—I wish this ten dollar bill was a ten dollar debt. Dick — Heavens! Why? Tom—I'd never get rid of it:— Cleveland Leader, We are sure to get the better of for- Remem?r the name — Doan’s— and take o other. tune if we do but grapple with her.— Seneca. Thackeray’s Satire. Thackeray created quite erroneous impressions of himself by often indulg- ing in irony in-the presence of people who were incapable of understanding it. One curious instance which he gave was this: Thackeray bad been dining at the Garrick and was talking in the smoking room after dinner with vari- ous club acquaintances.. One of them bappening to have left bis cigar case at home, Thackeray. though disliking the man, who was a uotorious tuft hunter, good unaturedly offered him one of his cigars. The man accepted the cigar, but, not finding it to his liking. had the bad taste to say to Thackeray. “I say. Thackeray, you won't mind my saying 1 don't think much of this cigar?” Thackeray, no doubt irritated at the man’s ungraciousness and bear- ing in mind his tuft hunting predilec- tions, quietly responded, “You ought to, my good fellow, for it was given we by a lord.” Instead, however, of detecting the irony, the dolt immedi- ately attributed the remark to snob- bishness ou Thackeray's part and to the end of his days went about declar- ing that “Thackeray had boasted that he bad been given a cigar by a lord.” Maternal Instinct. “Children that yell like that ought elther to be gagged or kept at home,” remarked the irascible gentleman with the white beard to the bus conductor. “And faces like the one wot you're searin® people with,” chipped in the mother of the noisy infant, “oughter be made into door knockers or sent ter the chamber o’ ’orrors.” The gentieman with the patriarchal face fungus took a brick red comples- fon. "1 know it’s awkward at times”— be commenced. “It's more’'n awkward: it’s nothin’ short o’ ‘orrible.” snapped the lady. as she once more glanced at the sorry elderly man’s set of features. When the rest of the passengers tit- tered audibly the old gentleman came to the conclusion that it behooved him to speak to the point. “I mean the child”— he tried once more. “And you didn't mean it no good.” returned the lady., *‘else you wouldn’t a looked at it.”—London Ideas. The Expense of a Wife. A wife is a decided addition to the demands upon one's purse. In that sense, however sensible and managing she may be, she is expensive. But everything worth having has its price of one sort or another, and there are some things which cost much without which life is hardly worth living. Said Thiers: **Most men contemplate making some self denial when they marry. They think they will give up such and such expensive pleasures. Later on. when they discover that they cannot do so, and at the same time they lack the means to indulge, they complain that it is the extravagance of their wives which causes the incon- venience.” Which wise saying is applicable to men in other countries besides that of France.—New York American. Reiterated. Edmund Kean was playing in “Rich- ard IIL.” and the part of Catesby had to be taken by a low comedian, who sauntered on to the stage at the wrong moment and uttered the famous words, “My lord, the Duke of Buck- ingham is taken,” in the wrong place. Edmund clinched his fists in rage, but otherwise took no notice of the re- mark. Later the comedian repeated the words in the right place. and when the king expressed surprise at the news Catesby folded his arms, walked boldly down the stage and remarked to the great actor in loud tones: “I told you so before, Mr. Kean, but you wouldn’t believe me Nonroyal Headgear. One of the attaches of the American embassy at London tells a story where- In Michael Joseph Barry, the poet, who was appointed a police magistrate in Dublin, was the principal figure. There was brought before him an Irish American charged with suspicious con- duct. The officer making the arrest stated, among other things, that the culprit was wearing a “Republican hat.” “Does your honor know what that means?' was the inquiry put to the court by the accused’s lawyer. “It may be,” suggested Barry, “that it means a hat without a crown."— Harper’s Magazine. Saving His Feelings. The Office Boy (to persistent lady artist who calls six times a week)—The editor’s still engaged. The Lady Artist —Tell him it doesn’t matter. I dom’t want to marry him. The Office Boy— I 'aven't the ’art to tell 'im that, miss. He’s 'ad several disappointments to- day. Try and look in again next year. —London Sketch. Optimistic. “I was pinched for being too opti- mistic.” “Aw, come off.” _“Fact. I thought the stock I was selling would be worth something some day.”—Washington Herald. It Covers the Land. “We shall never see that great American novel. It can’t be written.” “Why not?’ “We have too many dialects.” “Write it in baseball vernacular.”— Washington Herald. In South America. Foreign Correspondent—And who are those two men under the tree? Gen- eral Paprika—Oh, that's the second battalion of the royal guards.—Chicago News. R . W C (R . — Halley's Comet. A French scientist declares that Hal- ley’s comet was known to the authors E of the Talmud long before Halley | came into existence. This French sci- entist quotes from the Talmud; “Two wise men of Palestine, Gambiel and Joshua, made a voyage on the sea. The first had brought with him bread to eat. The second one in addition had brought flour. When Gambiel had eat- en all his bread he asked him for flour, saying to him, ‘How didst thou know we should be so long on our journey that thou didst bring flour?” To whirh Joshua did answer: *There is a very bright star which appeareth every sev- enty years and which deceiveth mari- ners. | have thought that perchance it might surprise us during our voyage, | lead us astray and thus prolong our voyage on the sea: heace it is that [ have provided myselt witb flour.”” Empty Titles. William Jennings Bryan once joked about our American fonduness for titles. “You .all know of the colonel.”” he said, “who got his title by inheritance, having married Colonel Brown's wid- ow? But I once met a general who got his title neither by inheritance. nor by .service., nmor by anything you could | mention. *“‘General, I said to him, ‘how do you come by this title of yours, any- way? *‘Why, sir,’ said be, ‘I passed my youth in the flour trade and for twen ty-seven years was a general miller. “I know another titled man, Judge Greene. *“*Are you, sir,’ 1 once asked him, ‘a United States judge or a circuit court Judge? “*T ain’t neither, he replied. ‘Fm a Jjudge of hoss racin'.'” A Locomotive’s Breathing. The “breathing” of a locomotive— that is to say, the number of puffs given during a jocurney—depends upon the circumstances of its driving wheels and their speed. No mat- ter what the rate of speed may be. for every one round of the driving wheels a locomotive will give four puffs—two out of each cylinder, the cylinders being double. If the av- erage circumference of the driving wheel is twenty feet and the speed per hour fifty miles, a locomotive wili give, going at express speed, 850 puffs per minute, 52,800 puffs per hour and 1,055 puffs per mile.—London Stand- ard. The Psalms. Many years ago a new clergyman was taking Sunday duty in a remote hamlet among the Yorkshire wolds. After morning service the old clerk came up to him and observed: “So ye calls them ‘Sauums,’ do ye? Noo, we never knew what to make o’ that ’ere P. We allus calls ’em ‘Spasms.’”— London Scraps. | ¢ Grit. | Grit is the grain of character. It may generally be described as heroism ma- terlalized—spirit and will thrust into heart, brain and backbone, so as to form part of the physical substance of the man.—Whipple. Liit your cup Inhale the warm, fragrant steam— That’s REAL flavor. ‘We blend it in— roast it in—seal it You’ll find it in " L SEAL BRAND Coffee Delivery Hours Mornings, 9-10-11 Afternoons, 3-4-5:15 Roe & Markusen Phones 206-207 . CorvRIGnT. , Our Ice Service like our ice, gives universal satisfaction. Every custo- mer is pleased at receiving each day a full weight of hard, clean and clear water in the solid state. Itis all important to have what can be used for Summer drinks without hesitation. Our sup- ply was harvested from an uncontaminated body of water. SMART & GETCHELL Phone 12. Stat a Savings Account today with First National Bank of Bemidji, Minn, The bauk has a limited supply Vest Pocket Savings Banks to be given with each new Sav= ings Account starting with a deposit of $5.00. You should have a savings account with The First National Bank 0f Bemidji, Minnesota \ I The City Drug Siore Gutting Whiskers! In most cases, when your face hurts after a shave, the razor is to blame. Did you ever have it occur to you? The Durham Duplex Safety Razor is yours for the asking. That is, we let you take one home with you to give it a fair trial. If you had sooner have the money than the razor, bring it back, because somebody wants the razor. This razor we speak of is best described in the following phrase: The Best of the Old and the Best of the New. That Pleasure i You find only occasionally by shaving with the ordinary razor is always there when you use the Durham Duplex Safety Razor The place that sells ‘em is the o Where Quality Prevails N club life, in fact all social affairs the tele- phone has proved its usefulness. Club members are accustomed to reaching their friends immediately and arranging to get together. The telephone gives them this privilege, and, in con- nection with the Bell system, it keeps the club in touch with the everyday world. Bell Long Distance service is always available. The man at his desk, at his home, at his club is able to reach anybody, anywhere within the range of tele- phone transmission. NorthwesternTelephone Exchange Company {l NEECATI\/™ DANAr ' i