The San Francisco Call. Newspaper, November 12, 1905, Page 2

dener, said my companion, ‘and then, as that. did mnot satisfy him he was promoted to be butler, ‘The house seemed to be at his mercy and.he did what he chose in it.. The maide- com~ plained of his drunken habits and his vile language The dad raised their wages all round to recompense them for the annoyance. The fellow would take the boat and my fathers’ best gun W treat himself to little shooting And all this with such a sneer- leering, insolent face that I would knocked him down twenty times if he had been a man of my own I tell you, Holmes, I have had to 2 tight hold upon myself all this and now I am asking myself if 1 had let myself go a little right not have been a wiser keep time whether matters went from bad to h us, and this animal Hud- became more and more intrusive, il at last, on his making some in- t reply to my father in my pres- ence ong day, I took him by the shoul- ders and turned him out of the room. He slunk away with a livid face and two which uttered more tongue could do. I passed between the r that, but the ; and asked me I would mind apologizing to I refused, as you may ked my father how he a wretch to take such himsel? and his house- venomous eyes, reats than his don't know what poor dad came to me next da an dad allow suc s with he, “it is all very k, but you don't know how I am placed. But you shall know, Victor. T}l see that you shall know, come wh: ou wouldn't believe poor old father, would He was very much moved shut himself up in the study all where 1 could see through the hat he was writing busily. evening there what to be a grand relepse, for us that he was going to walked into the dining- arter dinner and an- intention in the thick voice ken man »ugh of Norfolk,” he down Mr. Beddoes He'll be glad to see me say.” g away in an un- I hope,” said my neness which made Ah. boy,” said well to my window ‘*That came re bleod boil not ‘pology,” said he neing my ‘direction. vou will acknowiedge that thi§ worthy fellow said the dad, turning used I think that we pa- ¥, extraordinary T answered. he snarled. about toward him, , you do, do you good, we'll mate see slouched out of the room, and » hour afterward left fne house, aving my father in a state of pitiable isness. Night after night I heard wcing his room, and It was just was recovering his confidence n e blow did at last fall.’ “*And how? I ed eagerly. a most extraordinary fashion, A letter arrived for my father yester- ay evening, bearing the Fordingbridge postmark. My father Tead clapped both his hands to his head, and began running réom in little cir- cles like ho has been driven out of his sen When I at last drew him @ on to tife sofa his mouth and eyelids were all puckered on onc side, that he had a stroke. Dr. came over at once. We put ed; but the paralysis has he has showm no sign of re- ping consciousness, and I think that hall hardly find him alive~ You horrify me, Trevor! I cried. ‘What then could have been in this letter to cause so dreadful a result? “‘Nothing. There les the inexplica- ble part of it. The message was ab- surd and trivial. ah, my God, it is as 1 feared! As he spoke we came round the cu of the avenue, and saw In the fading light that every blind In the house had been drawm down. As we up to the door, my friend's face rov a m nd I saw dham him to spread convulsed with griel, a gentleman in black emerged from it. | “‘When did it happen, doctor?” asked Trevor. . o il “‘Admost immediately after you left. “‘Did he recover consciousness? _ *‘For an instant before the end.’ ‘Any message for me? “*Only that the papers were in the back drawer of the (hplnele cabinet. “My friend ascended with the doctor to the chamiber -of -death, while I re- mained in the study, turning the whole matter over and over in my head, and feeling as somber as ever I had done in my life. What was the past of this Trevor, pugilist, traveler and gold dig- ger, and how had he placed himself in the power of this acid-faced seaman? Why, too, should he faint at an allusion to the half-effaced ' initials upon his arm, and die of fright when he had a letter from Fordingham? Then I re- membered Fordingham was in ‘Hamp- shire, and that-=this Mr. Beddoes, whom the seaman had gone to visit ‘and pre- sumably to blackmail, had also. been mentioned as living in Hampghire, The letter, them, might either come from Hudson, the seaman, saying that he had betrayed the guilty secret which appeared to exist, or it might com2 from Beddoes, warning an old confed- erate that such a betrayal was immi- nent. -So far it -seemed clear-enough. But then how could this letter be tri- vial and grotesque, as described by the son? He must have misread it. If so, it must have been one of those:ingen- jous secret codes which mean one thing while they secin to mean another. ' I must see this letter. If there were a hidden meaning in it, I was c¢onfident that I could pluck it "forth. For an hour I sat pondering over it in _the gloom, until at last a weeping maid, brought in a lamp, and close at her heels came my friend Trevor, pale but composed, with these very papers which lie upon my knee held in his grasp. He sat down opposite to me, drew the lamp to the edge of the table and handed me a short note scribbled, as you see, upon a single sheet of gray paper. ‘The supply of game for Lon- don is going steadily up,’ it ran. ‘Head- keeper Hudson, we believe, has been now told to receive all orders for Hy- paper and for preservation of your hen- pheasant's life.’ “I dare say my face looked as bewild- ered as yours did just now when first [ read this message. Then I reread it very carefully. It was evidently-as I had thought, and some secret meaning must Ue buried in this strange combination of wards. Or could it be that there was a prearranged significance to such phrases as ‘fiy-papér’ and ‘hen-pheasant’? Such a meaning would be arbitrary and could not be deducted in any way. And yit.I was loth to believe that this was the case, and the presence of the word Hudson seemed to show that the subject of the message was as I had guessed, and that it was from Beddoes rather than the sallor. I tried it backward, but the com- bination ‘life pheasant’s hen' was not ¢n- couraging. Then I tried alternate words, felon but neither ‘the of foripor ‘supply same | Tlondun’ promised to. throw any upon it, $ “And then in ah instant the key of the riddle was in my hande, and I saw that every third word, beginning with the first, wou!d give a message which might well ‘drive old Trevor to despair. “It was short and terse, the warning, as I now read it to my companion: The game is up. Hudson has told all. Fly for your life.’ “Victor Trevor sank his face into his shaking hands. ‘It must be that, I sup- pose,’ sald he. ‘This is worse than death, for it meéans disgrace as well. But what is the meaning of these ‘‘head-keepers' and “hen-pheasants”? X ‘It means nothing to the message, but it might mean a good deal to us if ‘we had no other means of discovering the sender. You see that he has begun by writing “The * * * game * * * is% and so on. Afterward he had, to fuitlll the prearranged cipher, to fill in any two words in each space. He would naturally us¢ the first words which came to his minu, and if thcre were so many which referred to sport among them, you may be tolerably sure that he is either an ardent 'shot “or interested in breeding. Do you know anything of this Beddocs?' ‘Why, now that you mention it,' said he, “I remember that my poor father used to have an invitation from him to shoot over his preserves every autumn.’ light THE 3AN FRA NCISCO SUNDAY CALL. * “Then it is undoubtedly from him that the note comes,’ said L. ‘It only re- mains for us to find out what this se- cret was which the sailor Hudson seems to have held over the heads of these two wealthy and respected men.’ ad “+Alas, Holmes, I fear that it is ome of gin and shame!’ cried my friend. ‘But from you I shall have no secrets, Here is the statement which was drawn up by my father when ger from Hudson had become imminent. 1 found it in the Jaj e cabinet, as he told the doctor. Take it and read it to me, for I have neither the strength nor the courage to do it myself.’ “These are the very papers, Watson, which hes handed to me, and 1 will read them to you, as I read them in the old study that night to him. They are in- dorsed outside, as you see, ‘Some particu- lars of the voyage of the Gloria Scott, from her leaving Falmouth on the 8th of Oetober, 1855, to her destruction in N. Lat. 15 degrees 20 minutes, W. Long. 25 degrees 14 minutes, on November 6.’ It i in the form of a letter and runs in this way: ‘My dear, dear son: Now-that ap- proaching disgrace begins to darken the closing years of my life, T can write with all truth and honesty that it is not the terror of the law, it is not the loss of my position in the cou fall in the eves of all wh me which cuts me to the hear is the thought that you should come to blush for me—you who love me and who ‘hive selaom; 1 Hope, “had .reason to do other than respegt me.” But if the blow falls which is forever hanging over me, then I should wish you to read this, that you may know straight from m: how far T have been to blame. On the other hand, if all should go well (which may kind God Almighty grant) then, if by any chance this paper should be still unde- stroyed and should fall into your hands, 1 conjure you by all you hold sacred, by the memory of your dear mother and by the love which has been between us, to hurl it into the fire and to never give one thought to it again. “'If then your eve goes an to read this line, I know that I shall already have been exposed and dragged from my home, or, as is more likely, for you know that my heart s weak, be 1ying with my tongue sealed forever in death, In elther case the time for suppression is past, and every word which I tell you is the naked truth, and this [ swear, as 1 hope for mercy, “‘My name, dear lad, is not Trevor. I was James Armitage in my younger days,’and you can understand now the shock that it was to me a few. weeks ago when your college friend addressed me in words which seemed to imply that he fhad surprised my Secret. As Armitage it wa$ that T entered a Lon- don banking-house and as Armitage T wag convicted of breaKing my country’s laws and was sentenced to transporta- tion. Do not think very harsbly of me, laddie. It was a debt of ‘honor, 50 called, which I had to.pay, and I used money which was not my own to do it, in the certainty that I could replace it betore there could be any possibility of its being missed. But the most dreadful {ll-luck: pursued me. The money ‘whick I. had reckoned ~upon never came to hand, and a premature examination of aocounts exposed my deficit. The cise might have been dealt leniently with, but the laws were more harshly administéred thirty years ago .and on \my twenty-third found ‘myself chained as a _ thirt ven- other convicts of the bxk Gleria O ¥ ~ night ‘when _the c*tf eight, and th n largely use old convict shipsjhai as transports in the B Government k Sea. The od, therefore, uitablé ves- sels for sending out h prisonerss The Gloria Scott had been in the Chi- nese tea trade, but she was an old- he knew that the dan- snowstorm.. 1 was glad, then, to find that he was neighbor. and gladder still when, fn the dead of the night, I heard a whisper close to my ear, and found that he had to cut an opening. in the board which separated us. ** “Hullo, chummy!"" sald he, “what's and what are you here for? ed him, and asked in turn whom I was talking with. - “*“I'm Jack Prendergast,” said he, “and, by ——! you'll' learn to bless my name before vou've ‘done with me.” ‘I rememebered hearing of his case, for it was one which had made an im- inense sensation throughout the country some time before my. own arrest. le was a man of good family, wg great ability, but of incurably viclous ‘habits, who had by an ingenious system of fraud obtained huge sums of money, from lcading London me: s, ¥ ‘“*“Ha, ha! You remember my proudly, x your name, sald weuyary well, indeed.” £ “‘*“Then maybe’ you remember Some- thi queer about {t?" L Whdt was that, then?” T'd had nearly a quarter of lion, hadn’t 17" and got between my finger thumb,” he cried. “By —! I've ‘more pounds to my name than you've hairs on .your head. ,And if youVe inoney, my son, and know how to han- dle it and spread It out, you can do anything. ' Now, you don’t think it likely that a man who could do any- thing is golng to wear his breeches out sitting in the stinking hold of a rat- gutted, beet.e-ridden, moldy old cof- fin ‘of & China coaster. No, sir, such a man will look after himself and will look after his chums. = You may lay to that! You hold on to him, and you may kiss the book that he'll haul you through.” “*That was his style of talk, and at first I thought it meant nothing; but after a while, when he had tested me and sworn me in with all possible sol- emnity, he Jet me understand that there really was a plot to gain command of the vessel. A dozen of the prisoners had . hatchéd it before they came aboard, Prendergast was the leader, and his money was the motive power. “*“I'd a partner,” sald he, "a rare g00d man, as true as a stock to a bar- rel. He's got the dibbs, he has, and where do you think he is at this mo- ment? Why, he's the chaplain of this ship—the chaplain, no less! He came aboard with a black coat, and bis paper right, and money enough in his box to buy the thing right up from keel to main truck. The crew is his, body and soul. He could buy 'em at so much a gross with a cash discount, and he d‘d it before ever they signed on. He's got two of the warders and Mereer, the second mate, and he'd get the captaln himself, if he thought him worth it.” “**“What are we to do, then?" I asked. “‘“What do you think?” said he. “We'll make the coats of some of these soldiers redder than ever the tailor dia.” “*“But they are armed,” said L £ ‘And so shall we be, my boy. There's a brace of pistols for every motheér’s son of us. and If we can't carry this ship, with the crew at our back, it’s time we were all sent to a young misses’ boarding school. You speak ‘to youf mate upon the left to- # 4f he ds go be trusted.” found mly other neighbor Yellow in-much the same positlon asimyself, whose crime had been forgery. His name was Evans, but he afterward changed it,- like myself, and he is now a rich and prosperous man in the south of England. He was ready enough to- join the conspiracy, as the only means of saving ourselves, and be- 4 yol fashioned, h‘""i‘:"‘"’d- broad beamed, fore we had crossed the bay there were eraft, and the n out. sides her thirty-eight jailbirds shescar- ried twenty-six of-a crew, eighteen clippers had cut her She was a 500-ton boat, and be-. only two of the prisoners who were not in the secret. One of these was of weak mind and we did not dare to trust him, and the other was suffering from jaun- soldiers, a captain, three midtes; . d0C- dice and could not be of any use to us. tor, a chaplain and four warders. Nears \’From the beginning S WS 1y a hundred souls were in her, all told, when we set sail from Falmouth. * “The ‘partitions between the cells of the conviets, instead of being of thick vak, as is usual {n convict ships, were quite thin and frail. The man mext to me, upon the aft side, was one whom I had particularly noticed when we were led down the quay. He was a young man with a clear, hairless face, a long, thin nose, and rather nut-cracker jaws. He carrfed his head very jauntily in the air, had a swaggering style of walking, and was, abovc all else, remarkable for his extraordinary height. I don’t think any of our heads would have come up to his shoulder, and 1 am sure that he could not have measured less than six and a half feet. Jt was strange among so many sad apd weary faces to see one which was_full of energy and resolution. The sight of it was to me like a fire in a ly nothing to prevent us from taking poesession of the ship. The crew were a set of ruffians especially picked for the job. The sham chaplain came into our cells to exhort us, carrying a black bag, suppesed to be full of tracts, and so often did he come that by the third day we had each stowed away at the foot of our beds a file, a brace of pistols, a pound of powder and twenty slugs. Two of the warders were agents of Prendergast, and the second mate was his right-hand man. The captain, the two mates, two warders, Lieutenant Martin, his eighteen soldiers and the doctor were all that we had against us. Yet, ‘safe as it was, we de- termined to neglect no precaution, and to make our attack suddenly by night. It came, however, mare quickly than we expected, and in this way: ‘“‘One evening, about the third week after our start, the doctor had come L witness box. down to one ‘of the fiofi who Was L W0 nuu.ln'l'tn’;’ hand down on the bottom of his bunk he felt the out- lire of the pistols. If he had been silent He.might have -blown the.whole thing, but he was a nervous little chap, so he gave a cry of surprise and turned so pale that the man knew what was up fn an instant and seized him. He was gagged before he could give the alarm and tied down upon the bed. He had unlocked the door that led to the deck and we were through it in a rush. THe two sentries were shot down and so was a corporal, who came running to see what was the matter. There were two more soldiers at the door of the stateroom, and their mus- kets seemed not to be loaded, for they | were “shot while trying to fix their bayonets. Then we rushed on into the captaln’s cabin, but as we pushed open the door there was an explosion from within, and there he lay with his brains smeared over the chart of the atlant] which was pinned upon the ‘table, while the chaplain stood with a smoking pistol in his hand at his el- bow.’ The two mates had ‘both been geized by the crew, and the whole busi- ness seemed to be settied. “The stateroom was next the cabin, and we tlocked in there and flopped down on the settecs, all speaking together, for we were just mad witn e feeling that we were free once more. Taere were lockers all around, and Wiison, the sham chap- Jain, knocked one of them in, and pulled out a dozen of brown sherry. We cracked oft the necks of tne bottles, poured the stuff out into tumbiers and were just tossing them off when in an instant with- out warning there came the roar of mus- kets in our ears, and the saloon was so full of smoke that we could not see across the ‘table. When it cleared again the place was a shambles. Wilson and eight others were wriggling on the top of each other on the floor, and the blood and the brown sherry on that table turn me sick now when I think of it. We were so cowed by the sight that I think we should have given the job up if it had not been for Prendergast. He bellowed like a bull and rushed for the door with all that were left alive at his heels. Out we ran, and there on the pocop were the lientenant and ten of hls men. The swing- ing skylights above the saloon table had been a bit open, and they had fired on us through the slit. We got on them before they could load, and they stood to it like men; but we had the upper hand of them, and in five minutes it was all over, My God! was there ever a slaughter-house like that ship! Prender- gast was like a raging devil, and he picked the soldiers up as if they had been children and threw them overboard alive or dcad. There was one sergeant that was horribly wounded and yet kept on swimming for a surprising time, until some one in mercy blew out his brains. When the fighting was over there was no one left of our enemles except just the wardens, the mates and the doctor. “‘It was over them that the great quarrel arose. There were many of us who were glad enough to win back our freedom, and yet who had no wish to have murder on our souls. It was the thing to knock the soldiers over with their muskets in their hands, and it was another to stand by while men were being killed in cold bloed. Eight of us, five convicts and three sailors, sald that we would not see it done. But there was no moving Prendergast and those who were with him. Our only chance of safety lay in making a clean job of it, said he, and he would not leave a tongue with power to wag in a It nearly came to our sharing the fate of the prisoners, but at last/he said that if we wished we might také a bhoat and go. We jumped ut the offer, for we were already sick of these bloodthirsty doings, and we saw that there would be worse before it was done. We were given a suit of sailor togs edch, a barrel of water, two casks, one of junk and one of biscuits, and a compass, Prendergast threw us over a chart, told us that we were shipwreck- ed mariners whose ship had foundered in latitude 15 degrees and longitude 25 degrees west, and then cut the painter and let us go. “‘And now I come to the most sur- prising part of my story, my dear son. The seamen had hauled the fore-yard aback during the rising, but now as we left them they brought it square again, and as there was a light from the north and east the bark began to draw slow- ly away from us. Our boat lay, rising and falling, upon the long, smooth rollers, and Evans and I, who were the most educated of the party, were sit- ting in the sheets working out our po- sition and planning what coast we should make for. It was a nice ques- tion, for the Cape Verde Islands were about five hundred miles to the north of us, and the African coast about sev- en hundred to the east. On the whole, as the wind was coming round to the north, we thought that Sierra Leone might be best, and turned our head in that direction, the bark being at that time nearly hull down on our starboard M quarter. Suddenly as we looked at her we saw a dense cloud of smoke shoot up from her, which hung like a mon- strous itree upon ‘the sky line. A few -Seconds later a roar like thunder burst upon our- ears, -and as the smoke thinned away there was no sign left of the Gloria Scott. In an Instant we swept the boat's head around again and pulled with all our strength for the place where the haze still trailing over the water marked the scene of this catastrophe. ““*It was a long hour before we reached it. and at first we feared that we had come too late to save any ome. A splin- tered boat and a number of crates and fragments of spars rising and falling on the waves showed us where the vessel had foundered; but there was no sign of life, and we had turned away in despair when we heard & cry for help, and saw at some distance a piece of wreckage with a man lying stretched across it. When we pulled him aboard the boat he proved to be a young seaman of the name of Hudson; who was so burned and exhausted that he could give us no account of what had happened until the following morning. “ ‘It seemed that after we had left Prendergast and his gang had proceeded to put to death the five remaining pris- oners. The two warders had been shot and thrown overboard, and so also had the third mate. Prendergast then de- scendgd into the "tween-decks and with his own hands cut the throat of the un- fortunate surgeon. There only remained the, first mate, who was a bold and ae- tive man. When he saw the conviet ap- proaching him with the bloody knife in his hand he kicked off his bonds, which he had somehow contrived to loosen, and rushing down the deck he piunged iato the after-hold. A dozen convicts, who descended with their pistols in search of him, found him with a matchbox in his hand seated beside an open powder bar< rel, which was one of the hundred car- ried on board, and swearing that he would blow all hands up if he were in any way molested. An instant later the ex- plosion occurred, though Hudson thought it was caused by the misdirected bullet of one of the convicts rather than the mate’s mateh. Be the cause what It may, it was the end of the Gloria Secott and of the rabble who held command of her. “‘Such, in a few words, my dear boy, is the history of this terrible business in which I was involved. Next day we were picked up by the brig Hotspur, bound for Australia, whose captain found no difficulty in believing that we were the survivors of a passenger ship which had foundered. The transport ship Gloria Scott was set down by the Admiralty as being lost at sea, and no word has ever leaked out as to her true fate. After an excellent voyage the Hotspur landed us,at Sydney, where Evans and 1 changed our names and made our way to the diggings, where, among the crowds who were gathered from all nations, we had no difficultity in losing our former iden- tities. The rest 1 need not relate. We prospered, we traveled, we came back as rich colenlals to England, and we bought country estates. For more than twenty years we have led peace- ful and wuseful lives, and we hoped that our past was forever buried. Imagine, then, my feelings when in the seaman who came to us I recognized instantly the man who had been picked off the wreck. He had tracked us down somehow, and had set himself to live upon our fears. You will understand now how it was that I strove to keep the peace with him, and you will in some measure sympathize with me in the fears which fill me, now that he has gone from me to his eother victim with threats upon his tongue. “Underneath is writtéen in a band so shaky as to be hardly legible, “Bed- does writes in cipher to say H. has told all. Sweet Lord, have mercy om our souls!” “That was the narrative which I read that night to young Trevor, and 1 think, Watson, that under the circum- stances it was a dramatic one. The good fellow was heartbroken at it, and went out to the Teral tea plunting, where 1 hear that he is doing well As to the sallor and Beddoes, neither of them was ever heard of again after that day on which the letter of warn- ing was written. They both dis- appeared utterly and completely. No complaint had been lodged with the police, so that Beddoes had mistaken a threat for a deed. Hudson had been seen lurking about, and it was believed by the pelice that he had done away with Beddoes and had fled. For myself 1 believe that the truth was eactly the opposite. I think that it is mest prob- able that Beddoes, pushed to despera- tion and belleving himself to have been already betrayed, had revenged him- self upon Hudson, and had fled from the country with as much money as he could lay ‘his hands on. Those are the facts of the cast, doctor, and if they are of any use to your collection, I am sure that they are very heartily at your service.” MAKING A FRONT AND MARING GOOD HEARS Miss Fanple tell Mr. Paul to write to de coal man and order ty tons of coal jn @e basement of town house, because she got a polite letter from him dat if coal was ordered now and paid for de coal man would let it go at a bargain counter rate—only a dollar more a ton dan it ought to be instead of two dollars. Mr. Paul says he would get de whole opera- tion off his mind at one stab, so he sends de check wit de order. Den he says, “Science is a wonderful Ung, as de scientist is all de time telling us, but de ‘most wonderful ting about it is what it hasn't done. We now blasts coal out of de eart, drag it to de surface, haul it hundreds of miles by cars, den more miles by carts trough our streets, den run it into our basements wit sounds dat is sending many useful citizens to a gratcful dough carly deat, and when we have got a littie heat out of it we carts it away again in de form of ashes, to be carried furder away by boats, and from de mines to ite last resting place de cost of hauling, carting, shoveling, carting again, towing and dumping, makes up about nine-tents of de whole expense of getting & little of de heat out of it. Dat's what science lets us do.” 'What should science do?’ says Miss pnfe. “Toin de coal into 'lectricity at de very mout of de mine, and send us de 'lectric- ity for heat, light and power over a nice, clean copper wire,” says Mr. Paul. *Dat would save cost, labor, dirt, inconveni- ence, nolves, healt, storage-room, manners and morals. It would keep our streets free from tousands of coal carts, save furnaces, do away wit de trouble and cost: of dirt of taking away ashes, leave de air free of smoke and make us believe dat science amounts to something. Dat we go to all de trouble, expense, bodder, risk, sickness, sudden deat and cinders for to get our coal and boin it, is a proof dat we are a stupid lot of ignorant sillies who spend so much time talking about de won- ders of science dat we have no time left to make science do anything wort men- tioning. Half de towns of California is suppiled wit heat, light and power by a waterfall hundreds of miles away in de mountains. It all goes to de towns over a few copper wires, and morals, art and a genius fur good cooking are triving and growing In dat country as never before.” “But,” says Miss Fannie, “if we didn’t boin coal in de winter what would de man sprinkle on de sidewalk jce? It seems to me to be lovely, and sort of arranged by heaven dat de time de side- walk ice is in season is de very same ‘l(e‘;'-on dat we has ashes to sprinkle on Mr. Paul tought a while, den he says, 2 : Chimmie Fadden Explains th “You are right, me dear. I am wrong and you and science is right—just de same kind of right. Selence is a wonder, and so is & woman's mind. Let Chames fetch a small bottle, for I wishes to study how scitnce gets de suds inside de bottle witout making a hole in it. I takes oft me bonnet to sclence.” I tink Mr. Paul must been jollying, for dere is someting in sclence; and one of de tings dat I wonders at is de sclence of making a front. Dere is more men dan houses in New York dat has fronts (o em dat ‘don’t fit, or don’t even belong. I'm on to one laddie buck dat has been making a front of being a village cut-up in dis little old town longer dan I has been alive. But, say, he is furder from bems a cut-up dan one gnd of a stick is from de odder—and dat's as far s can - jf 45 be. All de time he has been making comic speeches at.dinners or steering off unfriendly laws at Albany or Washing- ton, for de good of de boss who owns him, he has been playing a game of his own wit marked cards—and an extra sup- ply up his slceve—dat would make a skin game short card man feel like he was a colcus Reube. But gdmebody is on to his coives. Dere is a hunk of gossip going around de plenic ground dat will make someting doing when de rumor gets to Mr. Jerome, and it is traveling his way fast. I never got out no license for a fortune teller, but listen' to your Uncle Chimmie: Before anodder year'is give de bye-bye dere will be a place to let in de United States Senate what won't hap- pen because of a term expired or sudden deat. Rut, honest, de science dat laddie has wolked all dese years to make de front of being just a dear, cunning old cut-up beats all de science dat is used in building de Willlamsburg bridge. And dere is no joke in dat. D2 cut-up is one kind of a front, ani de solemn mug who couldn’t be bad if he wanted to, because he is too 1o be spolled even if he was left out of ce ice box over night in a tunder storm; he is a scientific 'W too. 1 know of one of dose mu; hes landed members of his family a coltain pay- roil he bosses to de tune of near a quar- ter million a vear. Dat would been no front for ; 8pik ¢ ddl‘ or 'l yegs- d f_dis front is, dat % ljnma:iml and de rela- tives he has snuggled into de che should stop going to choich dere wor be de biggest kind of a drop in de pew rents of a coitan choich where de poor isn't let to enter. v Yes, Indeed, honeyboy, dere isall kinds of fronts kept in repair dat don't cost de owners a ting for de repairs. But I know of one front dat would make you die of laughing. He is de dome-of- taught line of goods. He's training wit a crew of glib boys for de Presidency, and his special front is dat he is bod- dered to deat wit de notices he gets in de papes. If you'd hear him talk you * would sure tink dat it takes his appetite away to be wrote about in de papes: he's in de Senate, too, and has so much to say“tor to ';d}wn.:- de nation dat he Is mostly on ‘eet taiking about tings dat Gelays de game. But he has his artful éve out for de nomination, and is fAghting a wise old gazeboo dat comes from his own State. So he has too keep his name in de pape while he travels on de front dat notting makes him so noivous as to be spoke about in print. I was hearing Mr. Paul saying dat if a man could talk him- self Into de White House dis was de lad to deliver de goods. “But,” says Mr, Paul, “I wonder how dis young states- man gets his name so much in de papes, when he says dat he stops awake o nights trying to dope out ways to keep his name out of print?” . I never had notting to do wit papes except to sell 'em; but I sometimes goes . down to a tall building where a pape is .made to see an old pal of mine who runs “'de elevator to de dome, an' have a chin- chin wid him about de Bowery. One day I was riding up and down in de car, and every time we passes a coitan door I sees dis tall statesman in writ- ing copy to beat a drum. fren’ tips me a wink, and he says dat de mug afraid-of-de-papes was writing a editorial on one of his own ‘hes, which he could get printed because he had a puil wit one of de editor mugs. Honest, old top, dat's no fairy story, and I wouldn't tell it to you if I had to give away de wise Jad's name. It Is a good yarnm, e Difference dough. to e good me proposition dat dere's a lot of science In dis wolld makin’ fronts. “But, after all, it's easier to make a front dan to ‘make good. De difference between de man who makes a front and de man who makes good is dat de man who makes a front gets his name in de before he dies, and de man who makes good gets his name in de papes after he dies. Do you remember de time dere was'a forn King and Prince here, and somebody gave him a swell lunch at Sherry’'s? Well, de Prince was asked who he wanted to have at de feed. “De captains of industries,” says he, and de mugs what was goin’ to give de dinner changed 1t to a lunch, because dey knew dat whoever de captains of industries might be, it was a sure bet dey wouldn’t have no dress close for dinner. gives de lunch, and had all de men who had made good—de captalns of industries —and say, p'chee, de only names of dose present dat anybody ever seem before in de papes was de names of de reception committee! All de committeemen had made fronts and all .de captaina had made good, and dere wasn't a captain in de whole boiling dat had ever seen his name in print till de Prince from a forn land comes along here and asks to meet dose captains. Dere may be some science in making good, but if dere is it needs a press agent before it will be as well known as de latest breakfast food. (Copyright, 1906, by E. H. Townsend.)