Evening Star Newspaper, June 3, 1929, Page 22

THE MONEY FOR NOTHING By P. G. Wodehouse n Newspaper Alllance and Metropoli’an (Copyright, 1939, By North Ame aper Synopsis of Preceding Installments. Dolly and “Soapy” Molloy, sharpers who pose as rich Americans. give Lester Car- Thody 'the idea that he can turn his heir- Jooms into cash by staging a_ fake burgiary | to ‘explain their disappearance. His effort 10 execute the plan is a_failure, and fessional crook. Chimp Twist, Who po: & health adviser, is called in. The Motloy Guests of Carmody's nephew. Huko, | Whose credulity is equaled only by his pas- sion for minding other people's business things for his pro- | A quarrel between | | Vyvern Uncle _ (Continued From Yesterday's Star) FOURTEENTH INSTALLMENT. HE strange depression that had Charles Bywater did not yleld, as these gray moods generally do, to the curative influence of as gloomy as ever—indeed, —rather gloomier, for shortly after breakfast the noblesse oblige spirit of the Wyverns old retainer who lived in one of the smaller and stuffier houses in Budd street. Pensioned off after cooking for retired to bed and stayed there, and| there was a legend in the family. though | give any indication of it, that she en-| Joyed seeing Pat. Bedridden ladies of advanced age sel- vivre. This one's attitude toward life | seemed to have been borrowed from the Prophet Jeremiah, and Pat, as she 80 minutes of her society, was feeling rather like Jeremiah's younger sister. | The scene of being in a world un-| Sympathetic and full of “an inferior | grade of human being, had now become 0 oppressive that she was compelled to the old bridge that spanned the Skirme. From the days of her childhood this sleepy, peaceful spot had always been a was gazing down into the slow-moving water and waiting for it to exercise its| old spell, when she heard her name | “What ho,” said Hugo, pausing her. His manner was genial and un- concerned. He had not met her since | the Hotel Lincoln, but he was a man on whom the memory of past embarrass- ments sat lightly. “What do you think | “Nothing in particular,” she said. #Just looking at the water.” | “Which in_its proper doing a bit of froth-blowing at the Car- mody Arms. Also buying cigarettes and other necessaries. I say, have you heard unstucky? Absolutely. He's quite non- compos. Mad as a coot. Belfry one seething mass of bats. He's taken to after swallows' nests. However, shelving that for the moment, I'm very glad I ran into you this morning, young Pat. about old John.” “John?" “John."” the rif! come upon Pat in the shop of time. The following morning found her | had sent her on a reluctant visit to an the colonel for 18 years, this female had neither by word nor look did she ever dom bubble over with fun and joie de emerged into the sunshine after some | worthy of her—a world cold and un- stop on her way home and linger on haven’ when things went wrong. She spoken and turned to see Hugo. . | that embarrassing scene in the lobby of | you're doing, young Pat?” Hugo, “is admirable_stuff. about my Uncle Lester’s brain coming climbing ladders in the small hours 1 wish to have a serious talk with you “What about John?” At this moment there whirred past, | bearing in its interior a weedy, snub- nosed man with a waxed mustache, a Jarge red automobile. Hugo, suspending his remarks, followed it with astonished eyes. “Good heavens!” “What about Johnnie? «That was the Dex-Mayo,” said Hugo. “And the gargoyle inside was Twist from The c so remarkable?” Hugo, astonished. “What's remarkable about Uncle Lester deliberately send- ing his car 20 miles to fetch a man Bervice.) dear old thing, it's revolutionary. It marks an epoch. Do you know what I think has happened? You remem- ber that dynamite explosion in the park, when Uncle Lester nearly got done in?” | “I don't have much chance to for-| get it.” “Well, what I believe has happened is that the shock he got that day has completely changed his nature. It's a well known thing. You hear of such cases all the time. Ronnie Fish was | telling me about one only yesterday. There was a man he knew in London, a money-lender, a fellow who had & glass eye, and the only thing that enabled any one to tell which of his eyes was | which was that the glass one had rather a more human expression {hen the other. That's the sort of chap he| was. Well, one day he was nearly konked in a railway accident, and he came out of the hospital a different | man. Slapped people on the back, | patted children on the hecad, tore up 0. U’s and talked about its being | everybody's duty to make the world a better place. Take it from me, young Pat, Uncle Lester's whole nature has undergone some sort of rummy change like that. That swallow's nest busi- ness must have been a preliminary | symptom. Ronnle tells me that this money-lender with the glasseye . . ."| Pat was not interested in glass-cyed | money-lenders. “What were you saying about John?" 1 tell you what I'm going to do. I'm going home quick, so as t5 be among those present when he starts scattering | the stuff. Ii’s quite on the cards that| I may scoop that 500 yet. Once a tight- | wad starts sceing the lighs . . . | “You were saying something about | John,” said Pat, falling into step with | him as he moved off. His babble irked or. making her wish that she could put’ the clock back a few years. Age, they say, has its compensations, but one of the drawbacks of becoming | grown-up and sedate is that you have to abandon the childish practice of clumping your friends on the side of | the head when thev wander from the point. However, she was not too old to pinch her companion’s arm. | “Ouch!” said Hugo, coming out of rance. “What about John?" Hugo massaged his arm tenderly. The look of a greyhound pursuing an electric hare died out of his eyes. | John. Glad you Have you seen John | “Of course, yes. reminded me. lately?” “No. I'm not allowed to go to the hall and he seems too busy to come and see me.” “It isn't so much being busy. forget there's a war on. Don't No doubt he’s “There's no need to speak in that |* contemptuous tone. I am, and there are a few more intrepid men alive than Hugo Carmody. The old colonel, be- lieve me, is a tough baby. If I ever see him I shall run like a rabbit and my blographers may make of it what they will. You, being his daughter and hav- ing got accustomed to his ways, prob- ably look on him as something quite ordinary and harmless, but even you will admit that he's got eyebrows that must be seen to be believed.” “Oh, never mind father's eyebrows. Go on about Johnnie.” “Right ho. Well, then, look here, young Pat,” said Hugo, earnestly, “in the interests of the aforesaid John I | want to ask you a favor. I understand he proposed to you that night at the Mustard Spoon.” “Well?” “And you slipped him the mitten.” “ell? “Oh, don’t think I'm blaming you,” Hugo assured her. “If you don't want , you don’t. _Nothing could be fairer than that. But what I'm asking you to do now is to keep clear of the poor chap. If you happen to run into him, that can't be helped, but be a ‘who could have come, if he had to come at all, by train at his own expense? My sport and do your best to avoid him. Don’t unsettle him. If you come buz- round, stirring memories of the past and thoughts of Auld Lang Syne and what not, thatll un- settle him. It’ll take his mind off his job and * * * well * * * unsettle him. And ,provided he isn't unsettled, I have strong hopes that we may get old John off this season. Do I make my- self clear?” Pat kicked viciously at an inoffensive pebble. “I suppose what you're trying to break to me in your rambling, woolen- headed way is that Johnnie is moon- ing round that Molloy girl? I met her just now in Bywater’s and she told me she was staying at the Hall” “I wouldn't call it mooning” said Hugo thoughtfully, speaking like a man | Who is an expert in these matters and can appraise subtle values. “I wouldn't say it had quite reached the mooning stage yet. But I have hopes. You see John is a bloke whom Nature in- tended for a married man. He's a con- firmed settler-down, the sort of chap Who * * *n “You needn’t go over all that again. I had the pleasure of hearing your views on the subject that night in the lobby of the hotel.” “Oh, you did hear?” sald Hugo, un- abashed. “Well, don't you think I'm right?” “If you mean do I approve of Johnnie marrying Miss Molloy, I certainly do | not.” “But if you don't want him— “It has nothing to do with my want- ing him or not wanting him. I don’t like Miss Molloy.” “Why not?" he's flashy.” would have said smart.” “I wouldn't.” Pat, with an effort, recovered a certain measure of calm. Wrangling, she felt, was beneath her. As she could not hls Hugo with the basket, in which she"had carried two | pounds of tea, a bunch of roses and a cake to her bedridden pensioner, the best thing to do was to preserve her composure. “Anyway, you're probably taking a lot for granted. Probably Johnnie isn’t in the least attracted by her. Has he ever given any sign of it?” “Sign?” Hugo considered. “It de- pends what you mean by sign. You know what old John is. One of these strong, silent fellows, who looks on all occasions like a stuffed frog.” He doesn't.” ardon me” said Hugo firmly. Have you ever seen a stuffed {rog? Well, I have. I had one for years| when I was a kid. And John has exactly the same power of expressing emotion. You can’t go by what he says (Originated by The Departmental Bank in 1904) When financial emer- gencies arise—or you wish to make a good investment — arrange for a Character Loan at i If you are a Govern- ment employe we credit your good char- acter with the money you wish to borrow. 1 DEPARTMENTA —_BANK 1726 Ta. Ave. N.W. Main 2709 UNDER U. S. GOVT. SUPERVISION MAYTAG ~Yhe Measure of Washer Value | ‘wash- ers are sold, you hear the Maytag used as a basis of compari- son. 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Now, last night he was ex- plaining the rues of cricket to this girl and answering all her questions on the subject, and®as he didn't at any point in the proceeding punch her on the | nose, one is entitled to deduce, I con- sider, that he must be strongly at- tracted by her. Ronnie thinks so, too. So what I'm asking you to do—" “Good-by,” sald Pat. They had lr:d.ch(:d the gate of the little drive that her house and she turned | moment,” insisted Hugo. | “will you | At this point he stopped and began to walk quickly up the road, and Pat, puzzled to conjecture the reason for so abrupt a departure, received illumina- tion a moment later when she saw her father coming down the drive. Col. Wyvern had been dealing murderously with snails in the shadow of a bush and the expression on his face seemed to indicate that he would be glad to extend the treatment to Hugo. He gazed after that officious young man with a steely eye. The second post had arrived a short time before and it had included among a number of bills and circulars a letter from his | Jawyer, in which the latter regretfully gave it as his opinion that an action against Mr. Lester Carmody in the mat- iter of that dynamité:business would not lie. To bring such an action would, in the judgment of Col. Wyvern's lawyer, be a waste of time and money. | The communication was not calcu- | lated to sweeten the colonel’s temper, nor did the spectacle of his daughter |in apparently pleasant conversation | with one of the enemy help to cheer him up. ‘What are you talking about to that says, “It Stays on Longer” Miss Anna Smith. dsughter of Senator | and Mrs. Eilison D. Smith_of South rolina, savs. "1 prefer MELLO-GLO Face Powder because it stays on longer, is less affected by perspiration and does | res; This wonderful French new Eis | $3.95 Auburn De Soto Erskine La Salle Oskland Buick Peerless Ford Hupmobile Oldsmebile Cadillae Plymouth GrahamPaige Marmon D Chevrolet Dodge Huds Nash Willys-Knight Chrysler Esex Pontise Whippet Stadpured | to the question equably. Charming Miss Smith‘; If Nationally Auto | V5 to VoS $4.95 Covers for all makes of cars . . . Models not in stock will be ordered . . . fellow?” he demanded. It was rare for Col. Wyvern to be the heavy fathe: but there are times when heaviness in & father is excusable. “Where did you meét him eably affected Pat's His tone di already harrowed nerves, but she replied “I met him on the bridge. We were talking about John.” “Well, kindly understand that I don't want you to hold any communication whatsoever with ti g or John or his infernal uncle or any of that Hall gang. Is that clear?” Her father was looking at her as if she were a snail that he had just found eating on= of his lettute leaves, but Pat still contrived, with some difficulty, to preserve a pale. saint-like calm. “Quite clear.” “Very well, then.” ‘There was a silence. “I've known Johnnle 14 years,” said Pat in a small voice. “Quite long enough,” grunted Col. Wyvern. Pat walked on into the house and up the stairs to her room. There, having stamped on the basket and reduced it to a state where it would never again carry cake to ex-cooks, she sat on her bed and stared, dry-ma, at her reflection O et with Delly M d 3 [O] an and her father, t{u 'fl llpecb“fi John Carroll seemed to be changing for her. No longer was she able to think of him as Poor Old Johnnie. He had the ihmour now of something unat- tainable and greatly to be desired. She looked back at a night, some centuries ago, when a fool of a girl had refused the offer of this superman’s love, and shuddered to think what a mess of things girls can make. And she had no one to confide in. ‘The onl. ;erum ‘who could have under- stood sympathized with her was Hugo's glass-eyed money lender. He |lfl1ekw what it was to change one's out- jook. = (To be continued.) i i Ban Liquor on Pay Day. TEGUCIGALPA, Honduras, June 3 (A).—Announcement has been made that the sale of liquor on all banana plantations will be forbidden on pay days. ‘The measure will diminish goy- Crament revene, but is expected to prevent disturbances of the peace. SCREEN PAINTS PORCH PAINTS AUTO - ENAMELS LACQUERS FOR WICKER FURNITURE Good Looking Floors Are Especially Important —at this season when car- pets and rugs vanish. We offer reliable floor- beautifying helps of all kinds — Varnishes, Stains, Waxes, Polishing Brushes, ete. 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