The evening world. Newspaper, December 22, 1922, Page 24

_Day a Real La Shaking Up || Shakespeare By Neal O'Hara ‘Trade Mark Reg. U. 6. Pat. Off. LISTEN ANDY —} uP an That DINNER AT OSWALD SHRIVVEL'S 1 GOT INTO AN ARGUMENT WITH A MILLIONAIRE BANKER ABouT Economy | IN OPERATING 4 Gar! E V e n ] n g WELL, HE MAINTAINED “THAT By Bide Dudley AIS FRENCH “DE BLoony® ts JUST AS ECONOMICAL “To RUN AS MY LITTLE RE LLK ON ACCOUNT OF Ty’ way 115 } ee { v7 X Copyright, 1922 (New York Evening World), Prene Publishing Company. FT in the stilly night, drama dukes catch dose of rheumatic inspiration. Now don’t snatch Cop: 1922 (New York Eventn| eoa Publishing Compa: Those Sleep Westropers. HE ashmen come at 4 o'clock, 1g World), Yen? wee, WHAT DID HE 5 * . the idea they think at night. Those To clatter on the sidewalk, | cuye think in darkness, But when RAVE. “To Say ? There's turmoil all along the] git idea perches on magnate’s skull, block, no bone ts left unturned to intrigue AS cans skid o’er the wide walk. | sucker public. This year’s fashion- yell: “Say, able gesture of Broadway merchan' 1 leap vn bed and y 4 princes is chucking Shakespeare on you! . the hardwood boards and selling What's this you guys are do-| nouses out to ticket ecalpers. ing?” This boy Shakespeare's got some One husky laughs as huskies do, | £04 ideas, but the kid looks short on “ch -hew-|'magination, What he needs to be f answers: hop the chew- And aa Chap ne © real K. 0. success ts lots more rough ing stuff, couple of bathtub scenes, faster “Khe ashmen toss the cans along, Beat and Lari of good gage. Pro- And one of.them will whistle, [@¥°!ns mags don’t want to discourage ‘Then, as another starts a song, tide tics GUD a eaiasd I seck some friendly missile | otnetto shoutd be role to fit Al Jolson. To slam against the leader's head My wife will say: “What folly! Come on, get back here into bed,” And I obey, by golly! Some day | hope a building falls, And buries seven ashmen, I'll laugh at their despairing calls, And yell: “Good bye, you trash- men!” And when they dig the bodies out, I'll simply roar with laughter, And then I'll sleep in peace, no doubt, For one whole week thereafter. Trade Mark Reg. U, 8. Pat. Off. Before this English kid Makes good, he's got to have his scenes rewrit by experts that know what makes the highbrows yelp. Give 'em lots of pep and comedy wallops, and 8. R. O. ol! painting will be hung every night. Mr. Eckstein that keeps indag digit on proletariat pulse {s going to blow full season's bankroll on this here piece called “ROMEO AND JULIET.” Only scene where Romie and Julie get mushy has got to be hyped up with more jazz. That's where Rupert O'Mulligan comes in, and Rupert |s best little old rewriter that ever slipped plugged jitney Into automat. Rehearsals will cut loose, and first balcony scene of Romie and Julie will have to slide across like this: (The best gags are Rupert's, not Shake- speare’s. Critics please note.) S'MATTER—DoES YouR WIFE OBSECT TO You GOING OUT WITH ‘fouR MEN FRIENDS P No! vou cary Go “To THe BACHELOR DOZEN” DINNER! ‘Ou KNOW BETTER “THAN “> ASK t Nov My «MARRIED FRIENDS’ BATCH"- BUT SHE ALLRIGHT— “ou NEEDNT OBSERVATIONS. ‘Turkeys are cheaper in Jersey. Wonder if jerseys are cheaper iu ‘Turkey! A shoe factory burned to the ground at Newton, N. J., yesterday. A movement to rebuild {s already on foot. Because of hoarseness Bonar Law cannot speak. He still has a voice in the Government of Great Britain, however, ROMEO—Oh, Juliet, how 1 yearn to marry thee, How I yearn to protect thee. How I yearn—— JULIET—Never mind how you yearn. How thuch do you earn? ROMEO—If I but had you, the world would be mine. JULIET—Yeah; the world would be yours and I'd get the air, ROMEO—No, no, sweet child; you do not understand me. Can't you eee I'm wasting away? JULIET—I can see you're wasting something, You don't want to marry me, bo. + ROMEO—But I do—! do—! DO! JULIET—Well, which is it? ROMEO—Come. Fly with me to the edge of the earth, HEY Mom? "PoP SENT +15 L WASHIN’ Home| g \ IN A Box THis Time - Witte @ Pon \ sent ME & 7 NEW DOE? | You CANT »? DoE oR PLAY WITH Mm TILL YOU | EARN THe | She Wanted to Know. In the country q city girl, when Theeggs were brought in by the men, Said: If eggplant you grow, Or ate you folks keeping a henf” TELEPHONE LOVE. (Vhat Hav Gene Before—Mary Dingle, SLIET—Ah- her fy guy! daughice (Ot Old Pringle Dingle, quits ll luli Anepher BY eux! See ge ar taashenn cosreicr one ROMBO—I repeat my request acogmpanied by her Chinese mal a to Hollywood to seek mayety train leaving Hollywood the girle fr trate @ robbery in the dining car by. ber with hard-boiled ters in, and finally Hoeo- he robber, a society % iter und Mary and Abba igo’ tb a fox-trot. Come on—let's ’ JULIET—You haven't repeated it yet. ROMEO—Then come with me to the edge of the earth, JULIBT—I wouldn't go to the edge of the earth with you much PUSH. OH} WHAT A BEAUTIFUL. STRING OF PEARLS | FROM DICKY DAW! | MUST SHOW THEM ‘To Tep — You've got too never medut to tromp on + BUT fT KNEW HE WAS GONNA, PuLt’ “Hat OLD ARGUMENT — an’ 1 WAS LaYIN' FOR Him! COME ALONG NOW-AND | WIPE THose Disrtes ¢ NE THaT HERES THE CARD THAT WAS ENCLOSED IN CHE. BOX — NOW SEE IF You CAN GUESS ry [The Evening World Comica] your foot,” ROMBEO—List, Juliet Pus) robber thus’ addresses! | sormet—wWhat ist? FRITZN- A UTTLE GIFT To + Mary. The man’s nico manner | RoyEo—r knoweth a lovely spot BEAUTIFY YOUR NECK. afoused sympathy in the girl's heart. Maybe be bad been a poor boy in his youth and had slept in a woodshed. “Very welll” Mary replied. “But please be more careful with those clodhoppers.” ‘Are you married, conductor?” Phe society woman was asking Hector if he was married. “Ob, ¢ suppose so!” The conductor thus supposed he wa “IT was married once,” said the robber, “but had to shoot ber when she broke a leg.” At that point the train jumped the track and began to bump along the ties.” “This is a terrible train to where a Roman mald and a Homan youth may talk of love in solitude, JULIET—You're wrong. That's u spot that every Roman knows. ROMEO—Nay, nay, Jultet JULIET—You can pull that “nay- nay" luff on Pauline, but not on Juliet. ROMEO--Wilt thou not elope with me? IULIET—Yes, 1 wilt not! the way you say that? * ROMBO (on knees)—Come! come down from the balcony. JULIET—Have of orchestra weats? ROMbO Is that you got a couph nay, Juliet JULILT—Sa 1 night you've been naying like a h What's the mat ter with you, anyway? dance on,” raid Abba Dabba ROMEO. ick for thee aoeansit [OH DEAR AND) 5 7 rae rb - — eee PAR. ae ’ The walter had been holding i Liar —Did you say “for or WELL, How Do You (Don't Ter Me } z lugus - } [cee again) the Chinese sirl too tightly, and | of"? Like Tuat FANCY TM CRAZY! Pao ipiricn -| WAT GLASS OF ¢ she was very sore at him. ROMBEO—1 sald FOR thee ut, CUSHION 1 WON TL LAYED IT RIGHT| S ee | HAD ANY EFFECT ON “Yes,” said the conductor. “I quick, Jyllet-—will you or will you AT THE LODGE Were on THe ENFORKED | MY MIND — 1'4 suRE intend to change my run soon.” not? LAST NicuT ? SoFA WHEN 3 | TWoN A POLKA DOTTED The train came to a stop, The JULIET—I'll have both $ fF | CUSHION IN THAT conductor opened a window and RON * me in the face and CAME HOME ae $ RAFFLE! say you love m JULIET—IP 1 can look you to the face I can do ANYTHING, ROMEO—Then you'll be mine JULIET—I'll bo yours when the five-and-ten-cent stores open counters. (Trick balcuny collapses; Romeo threw the brakeman out. The woctety women just had to grin. It ali seemed so absurd (To Be Continued.) THIS AND THAT. Municipal Judge Samson Fried- lander, just chosen leader of the i7th Assembly District, is known as the Judge around the Friars, He always bas a smile, a hearty hand- shake and a good story for every- ody. Not being a politician, we . sa don't know just what the Judge is|Treally needed u blanket. Everybody expected to lead, but can lead} bo saw bim bad a good laugh, and wuylhing fio District }merriment is always desirable at a een See th we tellers fo a Pomeranian and get results.} fre meat and Juliet do somersault and go into song and dance in one.) Now go on with the Shakespeare wrote it. story as {nto the Astor Theatre to see “The} Wisttul expectancy was on their|/dragging deformed feet along. Aud] kids went by, be mumbled Not long ago thcre was a fire near Town That Forgot God,” as the] faces us they hobbled or were car-|then there were the helpless one “By God, I thought I had my his hotel in Harlem, and the Judge] We saw an interesting sight on| guests of the. management. Big|ried across the sidewalk. There were] flung over the shoulders of the big | troubles, but I guess I ain't!" ied the guests out into the night. He' Broadway yesterday. Three hundred! puses brought them up and big po-|cute little boys with their legs ip] strong cops. Standing next to us wa And then, waving bis hand at a covered himself with slory when be crippled children were being taken jicemen helped them into the theatre.Jsteel braces, and pretty little girls fan ald, unkempt, ragged man. As the] little girl in a policeman’s arms, he ‘ . 5 1 SaYs “O wim , 2 SAYS = WHATTA Y'HAETA PAY YOUR CHAUFFEUR !??° OW! A BOX O'SOAP 2 THATS NOT SO SweELL ZT ALwaYys RETURN Home GREATLY DEPRES y THE MONEY For THat NEW Dae? TT THE ScoRE TSDAY} EARNED WIDING: Distes, MAKinAs BEDS. RUYAIN® EQRANDS = BTE +e FOUND - += GIFTS . Docked Foe BEING LATE Ta scHoo.- BEAG SAssy. MAKING SHOOT, CONTINUED \ Ta“oRROW | —— Rom ORV eMHEEE — _ Guess Again! 2, { EAS, FERDIE- je \ The Ke Is SO SLIPPERY ¢ smiled and said: “Merry Christmas, baby!” AND NOW PERMIT US To suggest that the price of that quart of Scotch you inten to buy for Christmas wo bring a lot of joy to several fi poyerished homes next Mondayy