The evening world. Newspaper, December 1, 1922, Page 36

_ DECEMBER i, 1922 i Laugh | _Every Day ¢ a Real Boobonic | JOE’S CAR Flin ik the. 64 hk Or a Telescope’ Evening |isPlaguess By Bide Dudley By Neal O’Hara. MEBBE “Hey'RE REPAIRING L TH ROAD DowN THERE - “they's | ALWAYS SUMPN WRONG witH GOSH, HE'S GONNA MAKE. ME GO | “O TH" LEFT —~ 1 wWANTA TURN 7 THE RIGHT %H Go wHeRE I'm Gon’ — | HE'S SENDING ME ouT OF MY 7) way AN ILL BE Late! GEE! 1u waeta Brow MYSELF TO A NEW PAIR OF GLasses tt! \ 7 HE ROADS IN THis Sool EY Doveright,. 1922 «New Tork kvening World) ‘by Press Publishing Co. Copyright, 1022 (New York B Press Publishing Cx A TALE IN RHYME. EADING epidemic TINGY JOHN MALONEY—all || S us fellers thought that he at wu at about fa man could ever be. He never | 8Tounds and big bunch of boobs comes ( ' i a) bought no sody-pop ner stogios back, One bunch simply leas toun- a4 - ee ning World), ny t ails this country is BOOBonic plague 0 boob goes to spawning tingy as ne little boob goes to spawning fer us all. So Stingy John M other, and Nation is now in horrerful loney ‘round the town wus known a8 smal. Maloney had been living in the ing germs in epidemic a town about a year. He had no — home; he boarded at the house of Guy that snaps fashion tips from Ezra Greer. He worked out on the section—got his two-fifteen a day. He never spent a cent. We s'posed he put his cash away. follow sartorial statistics and look like night when work wusover [his mother's son. Those tips on all gather at the store and | wat Well Dressed Chump Should k up sody-pop and such . fale an hour or'more. "Bout once | Wear are handsome song poems, but a k John come around to listen terrible advice. The boya that carve to the talk, but when somebody'd [those fashion diagrams make Cin- buy a drink he'd always take a walk. He wouldn't take no sody and no atogies would he try, but, | Once you start falling for their pre- worst of ali, he'd always leave and | scriptions, time has come to cut your eve nee to twit him |ftlends on the bias and sew up con- THE BIG LITTLE FAMILY Trade Mark Reg. U. 8. Pat. Off some about his being clost, and | ‘cts with dozen throes of boobonic plague Outsiend- as follows theatre programs. That is wild form of delirious foolishness, No one con] fom a 2 cn ope aanoeidd - a’ sc 7 +, By Press derella's slipper look Ike rubber boot pr. 1922 (N.Y. Eve. W. say things which, if ae MEA ia) 6) ‘ud brought "em forth nother prominent exhibit in Hail o} Jonn ‘ud take their kidding in a |3/ardte Top Boobs is constant reader of J SOU EARS AS a \ oBoYl wHy EVER | AND You “TOLD a quiet sort o' way, “I haven't got V medical almanacs and subscriber (0 : Seruat bore Klien SINCE IVE BEEN Me Wou ALWAYS DiwAT You HEAR ne coin ; AND WHEN Yo AS SE My, <2. local complaints. Pill pamphlets are | AAT -WHY Go AND — HERE SOUR WIFE HAD THE LAST woRD Me ofl —= ‘One time John got a lay-off and |only publications that look Uke comic \ Bia—eia—etn- = 7° See Spe et ANITH HER ! he went away a week. He come faiyplements and contain bad news. tae Retort back to his job again alooking I qpere is set of symptoms for cach and 1 ind meek. He never told us Pilere he'd, boon until one night [every reader. No Blanks. After three et down at the store: he told | paragraphs of this wonderful periodi- uw em Right pi not fone cal you feel like morning after ten We ha n there in the fe but just a little while when | ™ZAts én @ Berroom Jerry Bancroft turned to John Are you tired after walking forty and, with a playful amile, says: |cight miles? Bright's disease! Do you “John, why ie ee oily up? | feet bussing in your head when tele aa shows Mohn “be Tanaris phoning? Nervous breakdown! = Do you've got the cash, I'll bet.” you have pain in neck after watching John turned around afacing us airplane? Laryngitie! Millions of and says: “Boys, listen here! ! | seopie die every year and one is born hardly blame you for your jibes—I ., er; but, boys, every minute. Do you want to be one \'ve had a mother of them? Get busy at once and buy ing lots of care bac our specific! Do not die an early down East. I'v death, when you can live and be a there. “1 haven't got her any more,” he | boob all your | ALLRIGHT ! - Y YT MULTE ent on, speaking low. ‘She's by — 6 Sa Kee the side of dad, back home; no | High grade member of sucker tiade ) Mary, ave THe Packace | Jamin # ; Sheure ane way more expense. you know.” Then, Jis constant subscriber of ticket | OVER WS MRS WEBSTER. | * of | But I spose A HERES A Shy Vaiicnel while two teardrops filled his eyes ; — sie HAS BEEN GIVING You 4 Ts WorT Za L For Bor MERRY SHE welche sould hardly sec, he save: [Scalpers. Nice net of chaps, those i ‘Ss Pd) A NICKEL ‘Ta / Iéorta- | I BROWGHT CLEAR} , Your rRouALE Would Ht Minty “Came, boys, let's have a drink. |ducat brokers. They only want all & NICKEL FOR EAct ERRAND / Tare His wie YZ) | MIND Mom. | 4 Ovi “a ta \ The sody-pop’s on me.” you've got and not a nickel more. But 1 DONT WANT You Ta | fackace clean 7 { ~ iT Was awFue J | aon » IF T WAS T6 ae Watch and wallet business of Jesso TAKE 4 NICKEL i. Hee <7) OveER TO MRS : y) HEAVY AND MY Mom sai | Bi TEN CENTS OBSERVATIONS. James was in swaddling duds side of Ss UNDER STAND p = I was ‘' : Union bakers ran afoul three] S*al!peteering. That is trade where ! i sata f / To Take a) ; : Miexer - | strikes in Brooklyn yesterday. ‘They| ticket men are taxidermists, and ; t ; are out, of course. boob's skin ain’t safe in Longacre g ee a one Mattewan has a jazz orchestra] Square. A lot of our flattest and = composed of lunatics. That's noth- brokest citizens got that way from ing! Did you ever sce a Broadway| sing second mortgages to be among jazz band perform? those present at first nights. Fi Sweet specimen of cement culture is A DOOLITTLE GEM. chap that does eighteen manholes at 72 Ellabelle Mae Doolittle, the noted] miles an hour. That is stalwart boob poetess of Delhi, has sent us the fol-| that turns corners on two wheels and lowing poem turns turtle on one-man top. A short Dear children, turkey time is past.|4fe but a swift one. When this guy No doubt you each one stuffed, | 90¢8 out for speed he makes Maure- With good things clear up to the} tenia look ike a mudscow. He is high- You voy GET HoT- HOUSE, ROHS FoR y rsa N GOSH! BOBBY BONDS IN THE AMBULANCE. nank powered partisan of alcohol for radia H NOTHING... BUT NEITHER Do YOU GET A a \ ? AND A925 BQUQUET ON THE SIDEWALK | And turkey tender and tough, tora and chauffeurs, and very much GIRL LIKE lugar EVERY DAY: Yi The cranberry sauce we love so well] ON three - miles - a - minute limit, THIS MUST BE MY Lucky DAY t 5 a, Was there on hand, doubtless, too.|7y're erecting monuments to these a, Srgen ot ay er You all were happy, were you not, | 9¥v8 every day over siz-foot repair] V/ /f — THESE THINGS y recy iirhs eheceicks, your pits, where the parking is permanent, A y CosT ENOUGH t Ss ¥ ; ; ; Thie brand of boob and his :ife are a) ‘ IS My sister's child, Teeney Ricketts, | soon. parted. 4 Threw an egg at Erza Peel. wh, He is the portly dry goods man Spend your life and its carnings| FE | Teeney, why act unrealt snatching nods from head waiters and | But getting back to the turkey be another boob, Head table spotters | Children, dry. your eyes. are notorious for their infatuation | Turkey day will come next year with democracy. Gest cafe czars | Or else I am a liar. read Constitution at Ellis Isiand and know for a fact we are creates free TELEPHONE LOVE. and equal. Free with our darby and Mary Dingle, although she | eval to zero when we don’t cough up was a telephone “Central,” did |? them. | not believe in the eternal fit- Head waiters are fancy in formal i = é Sex| ness of things. Frequently she clothes, but they're two-fisted guys 7 l [LARRY Writ TING would tay to her co-workers at | When banknotes are waving You the switchboard, “I wonder!” |can bea boob and slip himanx. or| KATINKA ie Ferdie May Be Dumb, but Economical ! This, of course, made them |e 4 piker and slip him double cross. ae ‘ j sceptical, but Mary did not care. | What you peel off to alien table WOT'S THE IDEA I Hope you DON'T . RST! say Bit wt T we DON'T CHARGE Wet, TAKE HER THEN : She knew that eventually she | scout makes all the difference in the OF CALLIN’ A THINK TM GONNA WALK | I ep tgOU, Mags “HAT WILL YOu - : | | ANYTHING FoR: TLL WALK! | would be their idol, so why | Solar system. It is difference between Home ON A COLD NIGHT \— , CHARGE ME : HE LADY! é . H should she worry about trivial | D¢!M& royally walked on ike Oriental Taxi CAB? ad i Fans — p : SARE ls f things? rug, or vulgarly stepped on like a : 4a Nhs i ij € | doormat. You pays your money and i When O'Toole, the town sport, | you takes your choice, But true boob H winked at her right out on the loves being walked on, like an expen- } boulevard, Mary was ‘disturbed. | sive ve Tuckleh a carpet. Suppose Henry Ginger, the po- - " | liceman, should hear of it! | Was there no surcease and balm } Would he believe it was merely for this poor girl? friendliness, or would he insist Really, that’s a hard question i on arresting them both and sub- to answer Hl mitting the case to Commis- A bomb exploded Mary t sioner Collier? thought of Wall Street and won- t Really, I can’t say. dered if the anarchists were at | Mary was ina quandary. She work. Turning to Sport O'Toole had promised herself to cut up she said quietly scandalously, but could she” “There i. goes again.” Well, it seemed not. She was O'Toole was astounded, but | or a good family and, though not more so than was the fair «er father did own a race horse girl, She stepped back a foot once, she was a trifle nervous. and drew her automatic. lL As phe stood on the corner won- “Ob, hush up!” she said - = = = a dering if all the world was like (To Be Continued) NEEDED ASSEMBLING seemed worse than ever. Finally, he] pe: » yo’ is de good-fer PRIDE OF Rarer observed Sea in—in one oy the old countries** that, a buyer of old clothes came RASTUS was dressing to go to] was dressed except for his fee ness chile dat I knows Yo’ shoes OR almost hour a gentleman “You bet | am,’’ the Westerner re ‘Yes, indeed,’ replied the gentle) along AND NOW PERMIT US E Sunday School. He couldn't Ma,"’ he said plaintively, ‘does}am behind de do’, yo’ stockin’s am F from De en boasting | Plied. “And T ought to be, since my {man from Denver. “I know all abou @ “T puy cash clothes! to suggest that complaining is find his ¢lothes and pestered} you know whereabouts my shoes and} undah de bed, and yo’ feets am on] roca ay Toaen ican e SF a Sacer lt tha” his over fo: Rotten Den to ki Thus he yelled. M was effective only when used in | his mother in his efforts to discover] stockin's is?’ YOU, Now see can you mingle ‘em i “You dean’ re mighty proud a few moments and then asked Did|me gre: at-grandtether " iited re sure he was flirting’ g@h her, moderation. Q hem, On this particular Sunday el “Rastns¢* enit-hig mothe suan-!—Joden thim mountains," the Irishman finaj! | you ever bappen to hear ov the Dead | Judge. } \ a ‘ : io Sct ee il al naa een ena 4