The evening world. Newspaper, November 24, 1922, Page 36

ee mene ae Real Laugh _ Tom Busts Out Again By Neal O'Hara. 24, 1922 The Evening World Comics JOE’S CAR ‘Trade Mark Reg. U. @. Pat. Ort. Father Time Hooks a Wicked Left! At ar (Hv GLiS Bik QyPPED MO on GOSH ~ SINCE I QUIT PLAYIN’ GOLF “HE CAR — “Hie ain is onisp AN 1 REGULARLY I NOTICE MY LeGs NEED RE EXEReISE — IT'LL KEEP MY. DON'T RESPOND “TO “THE THROTTLE. OLD RHEUMATICS FROM ComiN' ON! SIRE. THEY _CUGHTA ——s Copyright, 1023 (New York Evening World), 6 by Presse Publishing Company DISON is out with new brown E derby for undergraduate trade. Wise cracking wizard of Menlo Park states college man in dumb. Collegers’ big kickback to that dirty dig is that Edison is deaf That mplite raszberry 50-50. ‘Tomaso is very careless with his health to break loose with crack like that. Some day campus guy wil! toss five knuckles at his chin and Fdinon will be dumb till they take his jaw out of plaster cast. Evening By Bide Dudley Ev'RY Time ‘BEE KIDS me] ABOUT GETTIN’ OLD 1 GeT SORE AS A CRAB — BuT = 1 Guess SHE'S RiGHT! Prorret, 08 reece oo ‘ H* written a play And he started one day To land a producer somewhere. ¥ We took it to eight And they all called it great, The same being merely hot air; (They laughed at his play When they’d turned him away, “It's not worth a nickel,” they said, "The man who would buy Buch a play must be shy On what we call brains in the head.” But one autumn day Buch a man came his way “It reads like a good one,” said he. {Whey called him a fool, But he smiled and kept cool, A sensible man, you'll agree. Me put up his cash And the play was a smash— The biggest success of the year; And that's how it goes With a whole lot of shows, It's darned hard to pick ‘em, old dear! Statistics pipe that Ford makes $264,028 a day. That ts tall money Gny way you gape at tt. And statis toa also state, 20 far as alma mater goes, Ford is complete orphan. Hank thnks OXFORD is a low-cut shoe and | COLUMBIA ta gem of the occan. Tin peddier of Detroit proves good and plenty that four-year term on campus oan be omitted and guy can still make good. Ford ie 6300 richer every time he tt breathes. Even if he catches asthma, Hey ¢ he a practically set for rest of his life. t LIGHTNIN'- Do But juat deoause Hank made good YWouR STUFF tolthout sheepakin prescription is no reason Pal Edteon should bdulldose collagera and call ‘em all colors of raindow, including yellow. Man that invented moving pictures hes no Noone to nickname varaity boys dumb. He can find that stuff tn bis own industry without snooping round academic halls. Out where oranges grow in California they are dumb good and plenty in movie trade. But they aren't any dumber than Tomasso's hired nen in Jersey, where Oranges also grow according to census. Alumni are whirlwind foros in Na- tion's activity. Half the collect tele- grams of world are sent by coltege| LITTLE MARY MIXUP men. If it wasn't for orop of rah- rah saplings, chorus gal population would starve of thirst. Frat pin out- Cit conducts all our leading riots and speed clocks wouldn't run up to #0 if it wasn't for campus guy some Corree WiTHosT CREAM f) OBSERVATIONS. Apparently Willie only loaned that Millard title to Jake. It fs evident that A. B. Bee, the @levator man, doesn't intend to give Adelphi College a lift. That Maine woman, who is fasting to regain her husband's affection, might be said to be hungering for love. A gang of men wrecked the Queenstown lighting plant night be fore last. As to their reason, we also are in the derk A Richmond Hill girl, who wed a Ohinaman, was disinherited by her mother. She has her Chink, but it fen't the chink of the family coin | Highway Rhymes. I walk along the street vatied Front, And hear the steamships groan and grunt; (T put the grant in for the rhyme), Drop in and eee me any time TELEPHONE LOVE. (An oxctting story of the appearance of Cupid in a telephone contral olficy.) Mary Dingle, seated in the cafe, gave the young man one look “IT have told you, my friend,” she said, “that I have made up my mind to go to the devil. Yet you ask me did I pay the check. I don't know why I ever dined with you. What is your name, please?” “Gerald,” the youth replied. “My mother named me one night when father was drinking.” “Ah, ha! I thought so. Then pay this check.” The youth was angry “Do you think I'm going to pay your beard?” he asked That’s a Good Kid! @ No.I wan ¢ Hey Mom. Done waNTeD T'n Gonna BE 4 Ae we an Hele Hee y @oop an’ NoT Get MAKE FACES AT THE Ae ao ota f so T cane SPANKED so s “TO Poi cEMAnN-BuT FT saip @QeonT eer Meee oe GET MY DOLLAR ¢ No . TM Rew coon- MY DOLLAR. | Poricemen _ ! with Sutt Y' see. MY Weev 1S UP “TONIGHT Tf thie is Publicity Week at Edigon factory, then Thomas has put it over with large orash. He chased that New Brunswick mystery off front pages and copped a few tons of pulp clip- pings himself. But it is tough that sophomores have to be dummies when Fdison pulls off grand stam. Tomasso is one of those boys that spring 160 high-powered conundrums on ie that come looking for office boy jobs. You can hop to work jill ing inkwells and cuspidors without knowing name of Blucbeard’s barber @nd square root of Poland’s floating debt. Tom is very fussy picking out co-workers. He would rather have non-collegiate moron that knew spe- cifte gravity of blackjack than Rhodes scholar that knows enough ito pull up awnings whenever it starts to rain VcANT HELP IT IF YOUR BEST GIRL DOES LIVE HERE-- THE RITZ HOUSE \S UNDER QUARANTINE FOR MEASLES: AND NOBODY CAN Go IN CR OUT AND THATS “THAT ! AW! THEYVE CHANGED THE GAURD AT LAST! NoW,\F 1 Don't GET IN MY NAME'S NOT “TED NICHOLS} BACK iN THAT HOUSE, Boy! ORDERS' 19 ORDERS | But when wizard says college boys aidestep dirty work he yanks largest bone of the stupid season. It is straight guess our leading miracle man has never piped football game. Extra added stab he donates to col- “Bwiteh-board?” Mary, being a telephone “Cen- tral,” thus answered him. It was merely a joke, so she laughed, “He, he!” “Why don't you write for the funny papers?" he asked “T have them all at home.” “Hey, youse! What about this ehec! The watter—a former gang- ster—was speaking. “Oh, go tickle a fish!" snapped Mary. The waiter was astounded Teking Gerald by the so-called seat of his pants, he toosed him through the door. Mary slipped handful of hash in her pocket. She feared future hunger. “Now, young woman," said the waiter, “will youse marry me?” Mary did not eeply. Her mind was far away in her home tn Dixieland and she seemed to hear her old Negro Mammy call- ing (To Be Continued.) THIS AND THAT. ‘The news that the New York the atrical press agents are forming an organisation is refreshing. As a "an “on the receiving end,” we're going to take the liberty of offering @uggestions for the by-laws. For tn- stance: 3, No member shall send out a legers is that they are lasy and ad- Aicted to sleep. Tom whines with authority on that indictment. Ho is guy that tears off four hours’ snoring so he can get up early and invent new questions dumbbell oan a wise guy can answer, you can't blame those collegers for sleeping late. But on theory a more queries than Tom should spend more time trying to cut down our light bills and quit brotling college boys for a while. The 1922 rights to domestic and foreign rapping belong to Conan Doyle. story beginning: “The old wheeze about the actress losing her jewelry became a fact last night,” &c the dramatic column conductors bi- Hindustan and all points South have been sold until they have been sold 8. No member shall send out a 4, No member shall send out more than eighteen stories of theatre par- tles per week 5, All members shall stock up with excellent cigars, rare old hooch and box seats to be distributed among weekly If the boys will live up to these Tules, the organization will be, placa: torially speaking, a whale of a suc coos Because of a sluggish bank ac count we have never been much of & Gresser, In fact we have never been able to move in the class of TL Keer You COMPANY «— “Tt SHE comes! » aa (PISS SST WILL BE RIGHT DOWN, /UR VASILNO! IF Y'DON'T HIND, Tit Just WILD ABOUT YOUR PICTURES !\"|CHARLIE YAPLIN | /OH, WE'RE DiFFereNT AH, HOW MY PULSE THROBBED | WHEN T SAW YU IN“THE SHRIEK’). |FAvoRiTe Before |} THRILL MY AUDIENCE AND "Floop An’ Dust’! 5" + |USED To BE MY TPES! I Never . YOU APPEARED on [THE SCREEN! s- pa ips NEXT Guy THAT | % CATCH CALLING ON | MY GIRL KATINKA, | WIL GET A BuLLeT NALHIS BEAN! ne) World) By Press Pub. Co.!*'> story to the effect that his attraction] Astor's horses, and it has irked our|the works of the other non-dude, she AND NOW PERMIT US A WORD TO THE WI6E. him and this attracted the attention of| ‘You can’t fly your pigeon here.”’ urcuna. moved ittana eaaaiie | hes reached {ts twentyfifth per|wite, But recently she saw a writer|has decided old clothes are the thing, N old gentleman whose hobby|& Pgliceman. avny note!’ en be “tT can't toas you up here, | formance. whose clothes were worse than ours,|and if our contemporary doesn't doll To inform you there is was homing pigeons took one| “What are you doing here?’ the} jp oot oe woe poe e is celeste the law { 2. No member shal] announce thatjand on learning his identity her|up until spring, we're going to be| ‘8h tailor up in Harlem named of his pets toa public park. | latter asked. rest you.” | the rights to his show ter Eyropelidess changed. Being an Adaipes ofivery, very Dapps. : . Gentle .. S97] Qeowle Kathered around te watch! “Getting ready to My thie pigeon.” ‘The olf gentleman placed the pigeon! soript, 5 4 3 ; ° a ne oe { = : . . \ ea a