The evening world. Newspaper, November 9, 1922, Page 28

a7 Nah a Evening By Bide Dudley. AST NIGHT | dreamed a little dream, psaw a valley wondrous fair, The golden sunlight, beam on * beam, Poured down upon a baby’s hair; She touddled through the roses there, And jabbered in a stream, T picked her up, this flower fair, ’Twas just a dream, but what a dream! perfect To-day | dreamed the self-same dream, I dreamed it though | did not sleep, "Tis made of thoughts of her that seem To burn into my brain—aye, deep, And when | bring them back they stem For me this old life’s rushing stream, And oh, what joy I find in them! They’re just a dream, but what a dream! OBSERVATIONS. Copeland victory was just what the doctor ordered. Well, when the Republicans go out to elect a man they do !t right, eh, alt Trenton woman suing man because he hugged her. Most of ‘em would give him a bonus. Volstead, father of Prohibition pill, defeated. Child rose up and smote him Daily News Record, published tn New York, N. Y., printed yesterday without a line of election news. Mills only Manhattan Republican @lected to Congress. Personal vic- tory for Will Rogers, eh wot? ‘No, Al didn't ride in on the Tam- many bandwagon. Vice versa, kid, viee versa! Asked twenty-sevco men yesterday and found only one who had voted for Nate. Aud be wanted to fight. Woodrow Wilson wore a smile when election returns were read to him. Missouri humanely omitted i “Nothing is left to be said,” Mil- ler's comment. But why the “to be said?” ICE-CREAM ARTHUR'S LOVE. A year had passed. Fate bad | not been kind to Anna Cracker- } Jacki. The bank bad failed and whe was without funds. With only six evening gowns to her mame, she had slipped away to Hooplaville and taken a position ~-B6 waitress in the Elite Restau- rapt. Anna was brokenhearted, but now and then she would re- eeive 6 good-sized tip. “I hope,” she said to Swat ©’Brien, the chef, “no one sees me here.” “Ha, ha, ha!” Swat was laugh- » tng. He thought the girl wanted all the oustomers to be blind. Just then a rat bit him on the Beel. He dropped the eggs. ((To Be Continued.) SALVE 'EM AND WIN. ‘A plaintooking fellow named Pound, 4 bore by the women was found, TU he learned how to flatter, Aa well as to chatter, And now they all want Aim around. A FABLE. Once upon a time there was a well-to-do man who was trying to Tead bis Sunday newspaper at home. ‘Under bis window a hand-organ, op- erated by an Italian, was playing “Bay It With Music.” The man gave the Italian a quarter and asked him to more on. The Italian, however, could not understand and gratefully eontinued to grind out tunes. The well-to-do naam was perplexed. Then ‘he bad an iden “I'l buy the darned orgen and fock it up,” he said i i i ; | : foyself of that awful noise.” everything to Theet gingham gown and her By making signs he conveyed to the Italian his wish to purchase the tmstrument and the deal was made. ‘The man bought the hand-organ for $88 and put it in the basement of “ he sighed, “I have rid Theat was kt 3 o'clock. By 4.30 TtaMans under his from to “The News Gals Will Be Gals By Neal O'Hara. Copyrteht, 1922 (New York Evening World), by Press Publiahing Company PTICAL statisttes indicate that gals are still lofg on beauty but subnormal on fotl, They like @lamond-atudded —cigaret Look pretty, but thay won't torclies work New-fashtoned bride is plecs of goods, At altar rail she promises like G. ©. P. candidate. And eccentric at homo after honeytour she produces ike high-grade of Soviet Senate member Love, honor and no work ing !s way wedding lyrics sound to her What has become of old model flap per that knit hubby wristbands and That is casy co- nundrum for innocent onlooker. She is knitting her eyebrows With sticks of lampblack and sowing wild oats tn afternoon jaz# parlors. In bright lex- feon of female youth, there is no such adverb as home When hoopskirts were nobby and butter was 20 cents a pound, all bride required was three-room cottage, loaf of bread and pound of cheese. Love and kisses were healthy diet, and as Plato said it, Nothing Else Mattered. But you can't inaugurate house- keeping to-day on Vienna roll and hunk of Edam, Before gal stutters Yes on dotted acoustics, you've got to have bungalow hattily padded with Vacuum cleaner, player plano, wash- ing machine, radio listener, electric toaster, automatio curling iron, pet monkey, machanical dish washer, silk-lined garage and electric shop- ping machine. Buttons the old gals used to have up their backs are pearl- headed push butions in kitchen wall to-day, sewed his shirts? Old-fashioned boy lke mother used to make eyes at kept cats, dogs, hens and animals like that. Fut toughest jo of modern sap Is kneping the wolf off front doormat and in the x00, where he belongs. New boys never lop closer to animal kingdom thao combing snarls out of pomerantan’s colffure Household statistics from forty- eight States show woman's place to- day is in the kimono from breakfast time till noon, They don't know vegetables grow outside of tin cans, and that dishes must be washed like canaries and sport shoes. When complete set of dishes are piled tn kitchenette and bride's alternative is sink qr swim, that 1s time she passes up sink and votes for swimming. Merry, merry modern gal thinks broom is for cleaning husband's pipe stems and needio ts for making phonograph sing. Her idea of keep- ing house prinked up in reading snappy fiction all over premises and sucking at a cigaret. She'll go from ash tray to ash tray, but simply won't dust Oh, what has become of that old- fangled wren with her sunbonnet, milk pail? Echo answers she is on the job to-day with her sun-porch, brougham town car and silver cocktail shaker. And what has become of old-fashioned opar and Gossip | JOE’S CAR hub that came home to sweet wife and steaming supper? Statistics re- lae when he reaches home now, he gets cool kiss from wife and cold shoulder from delicatessen. Such ts history of love a la mode. But don’t snap at notion that our gals are lasy. Where O. F. gal went to drug store for S-cent stamp, our new gals leap there to grab bella donna for pupils, rice powder for bloeps, pencil for eyebrows and orangewood for nails, Our current chickens aln’t lagy, neighbor. They'd walk a mile for a camisole. ——— eee certain the time for bragging has arrived. A BERGEN COUNTY GEM. Once in a while our mail yields up a really fine poem. For instance, we have one today from Carmel Wast- sciki of Bergen County, N. J., which tells of her return to the old home town after an absence of fifteen years. We haven't space for all of it, but this one verse will prove our contention that it {s 6 whale; The graveyard has been largened, The coupath has dteappeared, Autos would make tt dangerous For cows now, it ds feared. ANSWERS TO INQUIRIES. Dear Sir—Was there any place tn New York State where the Repub- licans won out? Certainly! Out was what they won almost everywhere. Editor—Where !s New Brunswick, N. Jt It is located just to the left of the scene of the Hall-Mills murder. AND NOW PERMIT US To observe that © man is \e!- ways wrong, in his wife's eyes, ee ee The Evening World Comics | And Joe Can Make the Payments! | Just Because, 1's he Carn 1 WANT, You NEEDN'T LOOK So CHEERFUL ABOUT T= You MAKE ME Furious"! i tr ain't MY Fat “Mey | ‘CAN'T MAKE A DELIVERY FOR THIRTY Days! “Tey can't Do MORE'M ODEAR!TM 60 WoRRIED~ <X BROKE A DEE “TO-DAY WE WERE MARRIED ‘YOU WALKED UNDER enone Some pry WO | OMA ui TERRIBLE eu HAPPEN Te Sou ! SuPeRstitious HONEY # MAS Slight Differences of Opinion! I TAve AFTER MY H MY Mom AN MY il PaP Too - } — MY Mom SAYS | I .TAKE AFTER MY PoP. SSS GOOD -HE Says I TAKE eS AFTER HIM - An’ mY Ma SAYS I TAKE AFTER P SAYS T Rive AFTER MY Mom? tosT | How AMUSING! MY DEAR GIRL EMINENT SCIENTISTS RAVE DECLARED My LITLE HAROLD Of Weta, HE'S YOUNG YET AND MAY Live tT Down | WAS ONLY PY GIRLS PLEADINGS THAT MADE ME RUN Pom CONGRESSMAN, jete THe CONGPESSMAN ~ SUDDENLY “Took SICK, . ANO Feu INDEPENDENT, THAW A GOVERNOR! FITTING. y (rrom the Philadelphia Bullet.) Mrs. Newlyrich—Do you think this gown is fitting for the cocesion? Mrs. Snob—Quite so, this is the worst reception I was ever at. ‘ HIS HAPPY THOUGHT, wes lucky enough to secure a taxi] The British navy te never at « loss, ‘WO sailors bome on lesve had| Half way home, however, he dis-|and tn @ few moments he saw a way @ined well and wined well, and|covered, on putting his hand in his|out. finished at a theatre. pocket, that be wes penniless. What] He caught up the speaking tube and Outside they seperated; one of them! was to be done? shouted, ‘‘Btop|" Then, jumping out, he tolt the driver to waft. He entered the tobacconist’s, and “I just want to pop into this to-| the moment he was through the door Dacoonist's to get a box of match the drtver and the cab softly and sud- I've dropped a pound note somewhere | denly vanished into the night, as the im the cab, and I can't find it in the| seafaring man hed anticipates.—Lon- dark,” don Telegraph,