The evening world. Newspaper, October 5, 1922, Page 32

By BIDE Wd like to be a banker . And with the bankers stand, . A check book in my pocket, Ten dollars in my hand. 1" like to have the people Say, “ile’s the town’s big guy.” *Twould please me like the devil. That much I can’t deny. I'd like to be a banker And. own a costly car, And have J. Pierpont Morgan Give me a big cigar. Wd love to be a banker And to the city rush To see the sights, while wifey— But there, I'd better hush. OBSERVATIONS, The juuiper berry takes two years te ripen. A colored couple in Harlem havo named their new daughter Cafeteria. H. L. Mencken, in Berlin, says Engiand may fight America. George Jean ought to yank that lad home. Miller Huggins smokes a pipe. It might be well if he induced his ball Players to smoke up a bit. A black cat crossed the path of Joe Flynn, a friend of ours, last night and this morning he swallowed ® fly on a buckwheat cake. THE KOYAL BOOTLEGGER. men Pace tieys, ied arrived In town Goping tho fim rights to this story It was wash day at the Palace and the Peppermint Princess ‘was watching old Maria rub the dirt out of several of King John’s shirts in the garden. Princess Fanny was not happy. She knew she could not marry Floosh, the American bootlegger, until the Peasants were pacified and yet she did not dare put up a holler for fear Chamberlain Brown would tell her father. Love to her was something out of reach, like the hash at the other end of the boarding house table. “Dingle, dingle!” ‘ The telephone had rung. The Princess smiled. It might be Fioosh calling. “Halloa!” she said. “Wrong number! Central. The Princess, @ropped in a chair. “I wish I had a piece of green } ; Spple. p's,” she said. , At that point a horrible face came from exhausted, } looked in the window. It had > “Who are you?” demanded the ~ fair girl. “I am the conjurer.” Lady-In-Waiting Dugan stepped into the room. Rushing Good Evening ! DUDLEY [ POEMS OF PREFERENCE Sayde Anderson is desirous of winning the sterilized picture of Senator Elias McQuaid, offered as the’ prize in this contest. At the same time, ehe hopes the poem she has sent to this column will find a husband for her. We hope so too, as we think every girl should marry and quit flirting. The poem: I want a man to cuddle me, A handsome, loving Valentino, With humor Uke Bud Dudley, Who'll come home like Bambino. He must never start raving When I ask him for his pay, Must have a disposition, saving, For the well-known rainy day. And when I get this dear, He'll have a lucky wife. For $10,000 this very year T have insured my life. a —— oni to the window she yanked off the face's whiskers. “I knew it,” yelled Mrs. Dugan. “Aw, you did not,” said the , Princess, “I did, toot” “Did not!” King John came in. Seeing the face he shrieked in anger. It was the face of the ragman. It all seemed so absurd. (To Be Continued.) THIS AND THAT. We have been notified that the Women's Club of Ossining’ will hold a chicken dinner on Oct, 19 at which a good drumatick may be purchased for 75 cents. Zachariah of the Dem- ocratic Register intends to write a story about it, providing he is per- mitted to sample the food without entailing financial embarrassment, Chicken dinners are great social af- fairs in Ossining. They have result- ed in a number of weddings. H. C. Lange of Newark has sent us a poem, New Jersey has turned out some great poets. Maybe, wien the officials of the State Govern- ment read this one, they'll turn Lang out. Look: Our little dog lay on the stove, Sleeping uke a log. Mother made a fire and then— Bow wow! Smoke up! Hot dawg! We bet. on the Yankees! yesterday. It ts therefore no wonder that we have written the following rhyme: The Giants deat the Yankees. All right—juat let it go. You'll die at dawn if you begin To say, “T told you so.” AND NOW PERMIT US to inform you that Harlem has Sa druggist named Morning who can be found in his store after- noons too. ERBA* TER, if the press agent : 1s to be belfeved, the “standees"”’ = gt the Winter Garden will be “eettees."” For, be it known, no Personage than Lee Shubert devised a seat, to be attached to rear fence in the big theatre, on the leg- may repose show. Once this suite if A a8 i i M Es a z z ey i : i patrons of the Winter be asking the box office H “Any standing-room seats left?" HE JUST MUST FRET. @ome men would worry even if worrying weren't fashionable. Take A. Page, for instance, Yester- we him how much of a iH he was receiving from William He told us and it was more ay "t know how long the job will E ¥ TO THE BROADHURST. Max in and Frederic Stanhope will present ‘The Faithful Heart’ at the Broadhurst Theatre next” Tuesday evening. The cast includes Tom Nes bitt, Flora Sheffield, Daisy Markham Poland, Lionel Pape, Daiv Geraldine O'Brien, Georg: ‘Thorpe, Charles Romano, Peter Car ad Herbert Belmore and Thoma: : Beveral new plays by Ferencz Mol . Associate ‘with Mr. Revnes as artistic advise: be Benjamin Glazer, The firs to be produced will be ‘Fashions out Plays and Players leading role. Others Lear,” “Little Violet.’ A BIG BENEFIT. The annual benefit for the Saranac Lake Day Nursery and Girls’ Com- munity Camp, to be held at the Lex- ington Sunday aight, should Theatre 1p} be & good show. William Morris is behind {t. Herry Lauder will sing and at least twenty other real stars will be on the bill. JAY ON THE JOB. Jay Barnes called us up last night “Say,"’ he began, “ ‘Molly Darling’ is a great show, eh?’ “It's a good show, all right.'’ “Simply marvellous," said Jay. Then he added: “Hear about my new Job?" * * said we, ‘™m press agent for ‘Molly Dar- ling.’ "* A CHANGE! TITLE. When the Selwyns present Ben- Am{ next month in their new melo- drama from Berlin it will be called ‘Johannes Kreisler" instead of “The Mysterious Tales of Hoffman,” MAMMA SEES WILLARD ACT. Mrs, Arthur Robertson of Austin, Tex. has comeall the way from home ‘o see “Whispering Wires” at: the 9th Street Theatre. Her son Willard s in the cast. Not until last night vad she ever seen him act. Bhe Bays he's good, but you know mothers, Gossip. Lola and Tara Fellegi, twin sisters ‘rom Budapest, have joined ‘The Lady in Ermine," Mme. Maria Kousnezoff and her Russian company will make their s { ‘ ‘ THURSDAY, OCTOBER 5, 1922 | | The Evening World Comics | SAY! How'm T EVER Gonna Ger "ER FIXED IF You STAND AROUND ASKIN’ QUESTIONS AN’ “TAKING MY MIND OFF wHaT ('M | 5. | DOING ? @ THE BIG LITTLE FAMILY IR, < CAEN SAID THAT NAPOLEON” Here 1S 1 “WH BEST RATER IN Seven SUNTES-WELL IF ‘We CAN PUT TH’ K-O- ON THAT BIG BAT IN OUR CELLAR HeS WoRTH “WH $5 TPAD FOR HIM! FAR BE (IT From ME To ANNOY You ED ~ “He's PLENTY OF HAVIN’ A FLIvWER Go T'SLEEp! Trade Mark Reg. U, 8. Pat. Off. REMEMBER MY on FLIER f “T’ SAME “THING HAPPENED “To *ME ONCE —T Fixed (T IN “TWO, SHAKES OF A RAM'S ~rAte’t WELL, IF You'RE\So DARN CLEVER - WHY DONCHA FIX “THIS one ?!! l ANNOYANCE IN = UK NS at Has Nine Lives! Trade Mark Reg. U. 8. Pat. Off. esate Susy Stew OY HERE” \ " OBOYNNT WAS A) A) HoT RACE bs “too! BUT THe CAT was A \ LITTLE BIT AHEAD: ~ xrasoy! NAP" - DO Your STUFF ' A Tea-LA- LA — & S + TRA- LA-LA KATINKA a ——e Yes, Tve Tauchr Her “TO SWEEP AND Dust AND “BE A REGULAR’ LITTLE +ouse WIFE - Yes. AND THE + DIRT Does NT ARE YOu SWEEPING. CAREFULLY -THE WAY T stowed You — UNDER THE BED AND 4 BEHIND FE Doors 2 FR -M~_aemeieaire — I Tod INKA SHE WAS WORKING “Too CHEAP, AN’ GAVE HER A SPEECH TO SPILLON THE MADAM DEMANDING MORE DOUGH. I MUST Go ROUND « "iWin see IN ORDER TO GET INTO OUR SORORITY, OF COURSE YouMusr] | Wap-to BE. INITIATED = TO BEGIN wr YOu MUST ROLL A PEANUT Witt A TOOM PKK FROM YOUR ROOM) DOWN THE MAIN CORRIDOR INTO MISS PRIMM'S OFFICE American debut at the Booth Theatre to-night. Alaska are represented in th U7 AH! 1 HEAR HER. RUNNING TO THE Door — BET SHE Got THAT RAISE Forty-two States and Hawai! and line-up} © He Couldn’t Face the Music! GOSH THAT WUZ EMBARRASSING?) | \F T'D HAVE KNOUN IT WAS FERDIE | | I NEVER WOULD HAVE OPENED THE DOOR WHILE I WAS | GWING MY FACE | [KATINKA HUSIA LosT HER JOB THRoucH MY ADVICE —— TD BETTER BEAT IT OUT OF TOWN Before SHE |_ —~ GETS HOLD OF | — NOW MiSs PRIMM, BABS JUST A YOUNG GIRL AND “Too MUCH STUDYING MIGHT HAVE SOME ILL EFF! Just AST { MOUGHT: gg ea by the Bell Syndicate, tne.) Wagenhals & Kemper are to fc 2 second company playing ‘Why Sam H, Harris has 0, where he saw ooks as though something will have »e done, FOOLISHMENT. There was @ young girt named M John Steele, tenor, has been engaged] of players in ‘Better Times’? at the| Love’ open the new theatre which] Leave Home" for a Chicago enga — pie for the new ‘‘Music Box Revue" now| Hippodrome. bears ment. PUT IT IN THE ACT. 2 in rehearsal. The Selwyns announce that they| The former Iceland Skating Rink on “What caused your black eye—home} WhO signed with a show just to sing Minsky Brothers will inaugurate al will present ‘The Fool" in a Broad-| Broadway will open as a dancing placc A THOUGHT FOR TO-DAY. orew?" The owner admired her, wuy theatre yet to be selected on Oct. Saturday night, It will be called thef ats are on a rampage in I “No, home bruise, The wife s Then the man fired “yi series of midnight shows at the Park wie Hall to-night, Blue Bird. and spooks are stirr Chicago up. me. B.D. ‘The Yankees should win to-day—ding { ~~“ so