The evening world. Newspaper, April 24, 1922, Page 22

\ A | amarmada. STORK NOTE. If it's a girl, her name will be Norma, Constance Talmadge Keaton. If it's a boy—— No, not “Buster jr.” Par from it. Just plain “Joe.” Of course, that isn't the way it will ‘be wet down in the family Bible, where ‘the dignified name of Joseph will be inscrived—but anyway, if the Keaton is a boy, Uncle %Joe Schenck will he just as pleased whether it is called Joe or Joseph. All of which means that Natalie Tal- madge and Buster Keaton—Mr. and Mrs. in rea! life—are anxiously await- ing the important event some time next month. SWIFT WORK. Tt took A! Gilks, Paramount cam- ‘ eraman, two hours and forty-two minutes Saturday to do fifteen seconds of work. It all happened when Walter Hiers, as one of the characters in ‘A Gilded the snails looked before they were cooked, and in order to get this Gfteon second *‘vision”’ Gilks worked nearly three hours. “The snail-actorg were slower than vome humans to find out what we wanted them to do,” said Gilks, “Blower, but not much.” ¢ SOME DENTIST. ‘The grandson of the first dentist in California is playing in Rodolph Val- entino's latest picture. George Field, interpreting “El Na- clonal,” in the Ibanez story, Is a di- rect descendent of Dr. H. G. Blank- man, who went around /the Horn in 1847 and pulled teeth ih San Fran- cisco during the gold rush for a fifty- dollar-nugget per molar. Then he turned right around and plugged up cavities with the $50 slugs and charged $100. Some business man. » peaean REVERSE ENGLISH. R. William Neill, director’, who has been rusticating on his Bayside, L. 1. estafe for several weeks, had inverted luck yesterday, While strolling along Movie Mall, Neill spied something bright and shiny. He picked it. It was a Chinese Juck ring, value a dime. Nevertheless, he slipped it on his fin- ger and inwardly gloated over the luck he was in for. A gust of wind blew off his $12 Easter hat and de- posited it right in the path of an on- rushidg truck. Cursing the luck that the ring had brought him, Neill strolled, minus his. hat, into the Lambs, ‘There he found three dandy offers awaiting him, one of which he accepted. f FABLEGRAM. ‘A news despatch states that ayschool teacher broke her neck while trying to comlj the snarls out of her hair. ‘The moral, according to Topics of the Day Films, is “Bob it."’, ity REEL WIT. - Sat through a long unreeling uf “bright sayings’’ flashed on an uptown sereen last night and heard the audi- ence roar at jokes that Joe Miller ever stooped to. But during the showing there was one good laugh, as far as we were concerned. It read: “And what is an egg?" asked the “An ess.” answered the boy, ‘is a - chicken not yet.’ ANOTHER “LIST.” ~ The National Board of Review yes- ternfay gave out the following list of pletures as especially suitable [or Mother's Week. "The Over The Hill,” Man «In a Million, “'Humoresque,"’ “Old Oaken Good Provider,’’ “Your Best Friend,” “Turn to The Enough tears in that bunch to floot “GREAT CAST, "Ris a great cast they've selected for “The Bitterness of _ Sweets.” ‘Stealalook: ‘Colleen Moore and Antonio Moreno are the sjars, and supporting them are: ‘The smallest pony in the world. A monkey with “human under. standing” (which does not mean that it has “Mapper feet.”) Blanch Payson, 6 feet 4 inches in fer bre stik sox. Billy Bletcher—tour feet nuthin’. A team of blackface comedians. Six butterfly ballet girls, and—— A lotta scenery. “C” NOT SILENT. Harold Lioyd ts beginning to think the letter “C" comprises the entire alphabet. During the past few days Harold has received scenario scripts from scores of writers and in almost every instance either the title of the story or the character about which the yarn revolves starts with the mystic third lette: Among the * suggested In the manuscripts are: Crap shooter, clart- » Ret player, capitalist, customs inspec- ~ tor, cannibal, clog-dancer, college stu- composer, conjurer, Captain, “@0w-puncher, credit man, curate, courtier and confidence man. “I don’t want to seem captious,” writes Harold, “but doesn't it look ke calumny?” ‘The answer, of course, ts “yes.” en RE-TAKES. "Some folks limit their exercise to at conclusions.” muses 's Pim Fables. #0 often big movie studio es om. the gnveral nepest of « "One |. WHEN 1 GET “To MY DOOR, You RING UPAN' ASK IF “THis ts MR. JINKS’ House THE WMOLE BUNCH'LL BE THERE, “TONIGHT — ANDY AN’ ELMER AND AND SHE'LL THINK YourRE Some. CLIENT = MAKE YOUR VOICE GRUFF OR SQUEAKY OR P6-sT! rve BROUGHT A CHAP NAMED “GooFUus=A “TRAVELIN' SALESMAN FOR DINNER -6O Be YOURSELF DEAR ! WHY You Were Home on “Ime! LEAVE (T “To Me. MY! eT MusT Be ‘essa! His 18 TH’ FIRST HOME -CooKED MEAL Ve HAD IN A’BLUE MOON” mam t SOU, MARRIED o “MR. GooFus” £ v yorey MARY. Ger INT BED So You CAN HEAR Tie . BEDTIME STORY ON SHE “RADIO — HERE'S A HAT, KATINKA — You'LL LOOK LiKE A EVERYBODY WOULD KNOW TI HAD A HUSBAND LJP NOTHIN’ Like THE OLD BonWeET! TLC ADMIT IT WON'T COP A PRIZE ATA FASHION SHOW - BUT WHAT PROTECTION THE OLD DIP IS INA RAIN SToRM! MONOTONOUS “TRAVELING ALL “THe “Time —ARE GREAT SCOT— ARE You WEARING THAT THING AGAIN ? Look LIKE A DRESSED “THERE Gots “PHONE — v's FINE ITALIAN HAND WiLL Now GET IN tt's DEADLY EVER WoRK t GET. “ome-gic’? vue Chu ee fein = L Joe~ HE Just CAME 1 in CANT YA ONDER STAN % WAIT A MINUTE '- I Have Nt CoT MY ‘TEETH BRUSHED Yet,” IT MAKES You UP MUSHROOM TAKE \T OFF! YOU THINK’ L GAve You WHAT DO MY HaT FoR ? Copr. 1922 (N. YaEve. World) By Press Pub. Co. Sed ‘CAUSE YOU'RE Too STINGY T'BUY ME A NEW ONE! = world’s fair, A trip through the] And we always thought he was a good Paramount studio just now would | %ghter. reveal scene in Alnska, Spain, France} Norma Sh y ‘ , Fear hearer doesn't know Sebi South Sea Islands. New/whether to be proud or not. Yester- ; ore State, South Africa and Brook-|day a budding song writer told her she “i een; ia had been his inspiration when he osep! ers, wide wrote "Kiss Me by Wireless.'’ epeakle actor, will have Pedi di to dag tant role in ‘Manlaughter, Mille's next big release. starring in movie titles just now latest Call" drama will be known as “The Siren Call” and will star Doro thy Dalton, show to be given by the movie crs will be the star attraction one were enough énds, wah" mansion just outside of Charles ton, 8. many ‘atest picture, as yet unnamed photoplay, will soon be put into pro- duction by Goldwyn directed by I. O'Malley wil! head the large cast. soon be publivhed Cecil de The word “Call” be The seems to This is Childeen's Exposition Weeh n Los Angeles’ and a big minstrel! y Every an end man if ther: would be “The Oaks,” a beautiful “befoh-de C, MB scenes background for in Corinne Griffith's “Broken Chains," the $10,000 pelz “Women Love Diamonds,”* an orig inal story by Carey Williams, will bx Mason Hopper, Pat A symporium ofethe sereen will Judeing from the] hi sub-tites. it oucht to tel leverythine| about the business Billy Bevan # to show us in his next Mack Sennett two-recler that he can fight us well ay be van wot. ald Rockeliffe Fellowes has again de- erted the screen for the, stage, this time ‘Weary rnest Hilliard yesterday signed t. play another villain, Q Did you see this man assaulted? sked counsel, “No, but I heard him cry for help.” as the answer. “That is not satistactory evidence,” \ld counsel. Aw he left the witness box the wit yess laughed loudly, uked him, and reminded him that he as showing contempt of court, ‘What? paid the witness in sur- vise, udge, sswered the witness.—Chicago Her- to appear as a golf Don Juan in Wives," which Sam H is is producing. as He will appeai UICK wit is @ pleasant gift. 4 witness was being examined in pearance, an assault case. three freshmen came along. The Judge re- wage Te-T inn at his expense. nen greeted him: vather Abraham!” “Did you seo me laugh white] , Another sata: ‘The profesor replied very “kam not Father Abraham, MAN who had been a preacher and later a professor of Eng- lish at the Naval Academy, se- cured a position professor one of the larg » the bad-man in Linda," Vita- r raph’'s latest Northern coi- oo leges. He had a TIT FOR TAT. wong gray beard which gave hin @ patriarchal ap~ While standin: on the campus at the beginning of one of the scho- lastic periods Noting his queer appearance, and not know tng that he was one of the faculty they thought they would have a litt! One of the youn “Good morning “Goud morning 1 my back to you?” wathor Isaac!" No, but I heard you," said tuo] And the third very politely greetec him with: “Good morning, Fathe “That is not satisfactory evidence," | Jacob!" gently neither am I Father Isaac, nor Jacob; but | am Saul, the son of Kish. My father ent me out to search for some young wsses, and lo! I have found them!"— udge. ree ete NO TIME FOR FOOLISHNESS. PARTY was surveying on # farm when an old man came hurrying out of his house and ked: “What are you doin’ here?" “Surveying,'' was the reply of one f the engineers. “Surveyin' for what?" “Bor a railroad.’ “Where's it goin’ ?* ‘Right through your barn, I guess,"’ aughed the engineer, “Well, now, mister, I reckon I've yot somethin’ to say to that, I want ‘ou to understand that I’ve got some- hint else to do besides runnin’ out to open and shut them barn doors every. time @ train wants to «ov hrough."'—Boston Post, at 80 CONFUSING. tained an invitation to a big dinner party, ad as she was being piloted from drawing room to dining room she noticed a marble bust on { one of the pillars in the hall. “Do you know who that is?” she in- quired of her escort. “That is Marcus Aurelius,” was the answer, “Oh, is it woman. now?” wr the late Marquis? xed up. i | experiences color-biind, “Well,” see, Sass : KNEW HIS LIMITATIONS, KNEW a chap,” sald an artist telling of some of his youthf in the Latin] That makes me sech a souse; Quarter, — “who] It comes atong in early spring painted land- When Mary's cleaning house. scapes, and when opportunity of-] & THOUGHT FOR TO-DAY. fered he waquid make a little mone to keep him going by decorating thi walls ejaculated “But can you tell me,” she added, “whether it is the present or I do get so -Houston Post. of houses PH with rural scenes, highly colored glaring tints ax if nature had turnec ‘There were always cows and always they were represented as standing up-to thelr kneos In water, “Why do you always put your cowe In the water?!’ some one asked, confessed the artist, I have never learned to paint hoofs.’ "Harper's Magazine, , ‘you POEMS OF PROVOCATION | Miia A EE. og Batauls ely Frank J. Mulloney of Mount Ver- non has sent us a Poem of Provo- cation to be entered in the contest tor the iron pansy. He says he wrote it Just after his wife, Mary, began to make the dust fly at their home last week. The poem follows: Noy, I'm an even tempered man, I seldom lose my head. Ive learned to smile at many things That “knack most people dead.” tut there's one time in every year the “A man may be down but he's never out’ may be all right as a saying, ‘ut many a pugilist knows better. FOQLISHMENT. Te took his girl to see a snow, It cost eleven dollars. They're married now; he keeps her home No matter how she hollers, in FROM THE CHESTNUT TREE, “My brother was arrested for find- ng @ pocketbook," “Absurd! Where did he find it?’ “da another man’s pocket,'’ and Players By BIDE DUDLEY La, the funny things that happen A in a theatre do not take place on the stage. Saturday morn. ing the telephone in the box office at the Globe rang and Henry Young answered. “Is this the manager of the theas tre?” a woman's voice aske “It is the Treasurer,” replied Henry, “Well, maybe you'll do. I am try= ing to think of the tune of ‘Away, Down Town’ from ‘Good Morning, Would you please sing \¢ “Surely!” said Henry. Then bé, sang for thelady., She thanked him effusively and rang off. t “Guess I'm some singer,” wag Henry's comment. “Not so bad!" replied his assiste ant, ‘but the song you sang was the ‘Blues’ number from the show.” “To tell you the truth,” said Henry, “I thought it was ‘Home, Sweet lea,” i . HOW HE KNEW FRENCH, Avery Hopwood, who is in Paris, went to the Comedie Francaise recently accompanied by another American who said he understood the French’ language. Mr. Hopwood understands {t fairly well, but he does not boast ot his ability along that line. After the first act a man appeared before the curtain and addressed the audi- ence, When he had finished Mr. Hop= wood's friend applauded vigorously, to the amazement of the rest of the audience. When he had stopped clap~ ping, Mr. Hopwood asked: “Did you understand what the speaker said?” . “Well, er, yes, I thought I did," re- plied the other. “Why do.you ask?" “Because,” said Mr. Hopwood," he announced that one of the actors had suddenly become ill and his under- study would finish the performance."* AS TO POPULAR SONGS. Away out in Morrill, Kan., lives @ lady who aspires to break into the song gvriting game and she has sent us a lyric as a sample of her work. It bears the title of ‘Daddy Bear," and is just a nice little rhyme. We have sent it back to her with ‘a note saying it is very pretty as a poem, but explaining that it would never do as a popular ditty of this day and age. It is so hard for us to explain to ambitious readers who want to be song writers what the conditions are that we worry just a bit every time a lyric comes in, A popular song to- day is just a set of words and q tune that receives sufficient “plugging” to make it a hit. Usually it must be a song of Mammy, Dixie, smiles or love and, just at.this time, it must .2 a fox trot. “The professional song car- penters write all the publishers need, so the outsider's chance is almost nil. HEIN. UNDER THE KNIFE. Silvio Hein, the composer, is re- cuperating at the Lenox Hill Hospital, where he recently underwent an oper- ation for a tumor on the spinal cord, Dr. De Witt Stetten operated in the presence of ten other physicians and surgeons. Mr. Hein was sick all of last year. He expects to be owt of the hospital in about five weeks. A JOB FOR FLYNN. Bert Gordon of: 1875 Third Avenue writes us to say he affd his brother have fixed up an act and want to.do some ‘charity work." They have four songs and one of them does about five steps just before the finish of the act. Now what they need is a hunch of jokes. Bert asks us to fix him up with four good jokes, but we're too busy. And then Bert forgets we cam get 50 cents from Billy Minsky for good jokes. Guess we'll have to turn this team over to Joe Flynn, the kid- ding advance man, Joe undoubtedly would take the job for a dollar and the jokes would be the best he could ac~ quire from associating with Frank Tinney. FIELDS ASKS A FAVOR, Johnny Fields, comedian up at Earl Carroll's Theatre, went out for a bite g to eat the other night and the wait~ | reas was very stow serving him. “What time does this restaurant 2" asked Johnny. Not until 2 o'clock,"' she replied. ‘s 11 now,” came fro Johnny. “You will see to it that I'ma not focked in, won't you?” GOSSIP. “Montmartre’’ moves to the Norw Bayes Theatre to-night. George Drury Hary has been added to the cast of ‘Her Temporary Hus- band."’ ‘A dress rehearsal of ‘(On the Stairg* was held at the Gaiety Theatre yese terday. = ‘The women’s division of the Ag» tive Republican Club will see ‘Mare jolaine’’ to-night, Norma Leslie, who hails from’ the Pacific Coast, has been engaged for \. “and Very Nice, Too." Blanche Terrell, a model for artists who want pretty faces in advertising pictures, is now in ‘Just Because.” Yorska, French actress, has come to New York from Paris and will be seen on the stage here next season. Now Jane Richerdson says she will not give those kissing lessons. At least, that’s what she said when we applied ‘The Hippodrome elephants will be shipped to York Pa,, to-day to be- come a part of the Walter A. Main Circus Charles Hammond, who has been in films, has quit the sereen and joined a touring company presenting “The Gold Diggers," Leonard Bergman, Treasurer of the New Amsterdam Theatre has recov- ered from an attack of water on the knee. if ae