The evening world. Newspaper, March 24, 1922, Page 36

PER RST T PEST 2 EPO TE RT OEY j é ' j i ia ii i i acs PNA Aiea en 2:8 Ne Raa PRAT About Plays and Players By BIDE DUDLEY LTO DDIE CANTOR will come to Broadway as a star next month He will be-seen in a new musi- fal production called ‘‘Make It Snappy,” under the direction of the Messrs, Shubert. A theatre has been selected but, since its name is being withheld, we won't say that we feel gure it will be the 44th Street, Eddie fs the fellow who radiophoned with us fat Roselle Park a few weeks ago. He had to follow us with his stunt, but, nevertheless, he made a hit with the radio bugs who were listening. We intend to be present at his opening, ‘wearing one of the shirts he sent us. You remember about the shirts, don't you, folks? The story is too long to repeat here and, besides, we're @ramatizing it and intend to produce it some Sunday night as a benefit for the Washerwomen’s Union. OUR OWN MEDICAL COLUMN. APPENDICITIS—When you are gure your appendix needs divorcing fend a friend to a prominent surgeon to tell him you have lost all your wealth. Don't let him mention the appendix. One week later walk (don't use an auto) to the surgeon's office. ‘Wear old clothes and look down and out, Then make arrangements to have the appendix removed. This method will save you at least $1,000, on which our commission will be but 10 per cent, HIVES—The medical name for this affliction 1s Gollygosho wattanitchie. It is derived from the Greek, although the disease is not confined to the Greeks. Hives can be cured through the use of genuine rye whiskey. How- ever, in order that the whiskey may not be misused, we would suggest that you get two quarts and drop in on us, We will show you what to do with the cure, and if all goes well we may sing for you. BOOTLEGGER HOARSENESS— This is an affliction of the throat Which comes using a hoarse whisper to say “Nead any spirits to- day?” It attacks only the rich or those on the way to wealth. There is ‘But one cure for it—a change of avo- cation. If it becomes acute we would suggest you sell your route and good will, buy a home in Newport and rest a while. A BIG BENEFIT. Amerigan stage stars will co-oper- ate with the Russian “Chauve Souris” at the 49th Street Theatre Sunday evening, April 9, when a special per- formance of Balieff's Bat Theatre Company will be given to raise money for starving theatrical artists in Ris- sia, Morris Gest is Chairman of the committee in charge. A LETTER. Ray Brook Matty, Ray Brook, N. Y.: Dear Matty: You write good stuff, but you must not try to rhyme ‘‘floor’’ with “claw” or ‘thoughts’ with ‘re- ports’ if you wish to bust into this colun as a real poet. The children aro well, except Yhat little Bronsie bit the cat yemterday and was scratched on the living room floor. Uncle Oscar has made so much money ‘bootlegging he is thinking of writing Wolstead a letter of thanks. He sent ‘us a song yesterday called The Face on the Drug Store Floor.’ Cousin Henry is coming to town next week. We intend to take Hen to see “The Nest." Now don't forget about the bum rhymes you're trying to put over ‘They’re out. As ever, UNCLE BEEDEE. GUITRYS COMING HERE. A cable message from Crosby Gaige to the Selwyns announces he has ar- ranged for the Guitrys to come to America next season and act under Selwyn direction. The entire Com- edie-Francaise company will come a@lorg. The Guitrys are three—Lv cien, Sacha, his son, and Yvonne Printemps, the son's wife. HE'LL BE GENIAL. Maxwell Bodenheim, poet, is to read from his own works to-morrow might at Old Lincoln Hall, No, 169 East Houston Street *I intend to introduce genial im- pulse into my talk,” writes Maxwell to us, “instead of clinging to a tixed subject, and my voice will be a pre- cise clarinet.” Gosh! Guess we'll have to go! LEVY GOING SOUTH. Abraham Levy, General Manager um H. Harris, is leaving to for a stay at Southern Pines The length of his visit depends on his health. He has been working hard and isn't feeling well GOSSIP. Charlotte Greenwood of “Letty Pep per" opens at the Vanderbilt on April 16. The Friars will wine and grape juice R. H. Burnside at the Monas tery on April 2 ¢ E STAY FOR LUNCH, FERDIE - THE Hissus \S OUT AN TLE MAKE You SOME NICE WHEAT CAKES ! [Farr eNouGH !} You'Re our. AT NIGHT So MUCH THE FAMILY UPSTAIRS + THINK You ARE A * NIGHT WATCHMAN ! L uNcockin OVER \ MY H+0USE ¢ {LL Go IN HERE AND GIVE. ELMER A RING - Lt GET HIM 7 PICK Us UP HERE AND DRIVE US HOME ei THE BIG LITTLE FAMILY You JUST KEEP ON SWEEPIN) GAL- 1 CAN MAKE MY OWN! | Theatrical News and Gossip ELmMer ~ {M DOWN ar’ “tHe. ARE “You GOING ‘Yo A LODGE MEETING- OR DUST AROUND TO THe CRAP BOKER” ciLus ? ‘Cope. 1922 (N. Y. Eve. World By'Press Pub. Co! LITTLE MARY MIXUP You STAY OVER THERE Now ¢ DONT YOU COME OVER HERE ANY MORE LAIN'T BEEN KEEPIN’ BACHELOR APARTMENTS FER SIX YEARS WITHOUT KNOWIN’ SOMETHING ABOUT COOKIN’! WHERE'S THE MOLASSES, KATINKA? $ (SoouL Fup ITIN A CAN ON THE SHELF ! RHYMED THRILLS Ve of in “E be th The concert at the Century Theatre Sunday evening will be for the bene- fit of Mount Zion Temple Cecil Lean Blushing Bride diophone concert 8 introduced in ‘The a burlesque of a ra- Denman Maley n eng a role in “Lady Bug,"’ the Philip Klein is producing ged for new farce Leo, the lion in ‘Chuckles of 1921," Row at the Winter Game » will vinut vis ma at Madison Square Garden to- Ben Potar, ost No, of Richard J, MeNally » American Legion, nt us a copy of The Sniper, the ficial publication of that Post and It they are continuing our thymed Proposals’ ys, but we'll have yalty on the idea, contest to ¢ a Watermelon, Ben has sent us, also, a rhymed thrill, He wants the song, “You May Hold Me Tizht If You Get Me Tight" for the boys to sing at eir club house, Here's his thrill: In the subway one fine day In the merry month of May, Thought I'd get extravagant, Got a penny from my aunt, Put it in the View-gum slot, Got an awful shock, that's what, I will say it thrilled me some When out came a slice of gum. morrow Rheba Stewart will arrive from Paris next week to see her mother ishe has been in musical comedy over there Paul Geraldy, author of Nost,"* ‘ W. A. Brauly visit him in New York soon Doris Kenyon of “Up the Ladder has Sorry, » you a For every couple you marry off you'll have to give us ys the report that she i all wrong. you! The Room Club, to be atre April 16 rnard Randall The new 42 of thea high binders, the April 23, kem Six" one. Ah, Doris, how selfish of annual Revel of the held at the to wed is] @ will be directed by Street Jazz Band, made into rehearsal In the east = (Suitor Rebuffed by Lady.) Heo EtmeR! Say ris TEN CORNER — ED's witn "me “ARE YGOING HOME PRETTY soon ? The Day’s Good Stories KNEW WHAT HE WANTED. ppened in a Powell Street res for hig meal and the recklessness “THREE PEOPLE — — ASKED You Dust OuT OF IDLE curiosity ! UNFORTUNATELY FOR You ~ AND YOUR FRIEND, Joe ~ my WEE IS WITH ME “ObAY. AND As YOU KNOW , MY CAR ONLY SEATS Tt FiX You Now sit RIGHT “THERE Youmn - Mmm — LCOULD DWE INTOA BARREL OF THESE AN’ Come UP FER MORE! The “Destroyer” Is Now Anchored ! WHY A STOMACH-PUMP,] J YES, MY FELLER which he ordered respect of his with the commanded greedy waiter | taurant. Bucolic was his dress] ‘And now,” said the waiter, as he Heal treasurers and other and, bucolic his complexion, {brushed off the table Suppose Will make its debut et lyut wealth radiated from him—from | You'll have a demi-tas: reasurers’ Henefit at the Hudson, |iig expensive headgear to the big You bet." said the man from the diamond on his finger. He sat down] Country. “And while you're back in Phe Selwyns have put ‘The Schen the kitchen bring me a cup of coffee, too.""—San Francisco Chronicle ae Barney Bernard, Alexander Carr, | white in Rome recently, were received . Teatrice Allen, Jane Spottswood, Lee | SPe In fom jad HE MET A FOOT, ANYHOW. Kohl Edward Mordant, Mrs. Jen i AT MURPHY was a great favor- nie Moscowitz and Frank Allworth A THOUGHT FOR TO-DAY P ite in the works. Even his em- : ployer would sometimes sto} We have been informed upon au-| when you walk, walk as though a GA eae i rca) thority that cannot be questioned you were going somewhere and you'll the boss met Pat that Richard ‘Temple The Hotel] get somewhere. “Morning, Pat," he said hear Mouse” simply detest wigs and al- _—— t lately you've taken y se" ate aken quite a faney most screams when ne has to wei FOOLISHMENT. for the girle."" Pat blushed and sniggered Jules Hurtig and the Messrs, Shu-| Sweet woman, will you marry me? not met your fate yet?" bert will peesent “Just Married’ In Oh, shut up, old thing! a the Dons: : London in June with an English cast.) 9 joy let Cupid carry me, ‘ Ba SSO As arian The Convalescent Home for Vet- Oh, you hush your mouth! father's fate in one of his big shoes ans will have abenctit show at the] Au right, if you will not be mine,|last noight dam Harris Theatre Sunday My job as waiter PU resign . mare: sl ‘And go get soused on turpentine, AS SEEN BY OTHERS, The League of Girls’ Clubs will send That's another big lie? a bear ire two Kinds of men 100 representaties to sce Julia San in this world Gndaraa’ Jerson in e” March 29 A the tol f Raat FROM THE CHESTNUT TREE Pa ainiat ti a yee 4 I The Wrovided a dot ox You're y route dash 9 ment in Bosash "The i Ne es : “T imagine the excitement was in] shave themselves and t i t Mr, end Mrs, Winchell Smith, |tepte.'’ ebaved) myself By DON ALLE FROM NOW ON. The telephone in Warner Brothers buzzed and bizzed yesterday. A Ware ner executive answered. his is Mr, Blank, head of the Welfare League at Ossining,” an= nounced the volce, and the Warner official “yessed,” as per schedule, ‘The members of the league wiskl very much to see Wesley Barry 1% ‘School Days.’ Can you lend us the film?” Sure,” enthused the Warner mut “Always glad to aid a Welfar®« League. But I'd like to see you, Mi Blank, to make the arrangements, What time will you be in?” Any time between 1 and 1942,” answered the league representative, “I’m doing twenty years.” HE WHO GOT SLAPPED. William Russell and Helen Fergus n jumped into the centre of somihh ction” that was not in the script out on the Coast the early part of this week k It seems that Miss Ferguson started out through a revolving door, when he-vamp stopped the door and ae at her through the glass, She couldn’ move, ‘Then Russell saw what was happening. Unlike Miss Ferguson, Russell could move and did. So did the masher. ‘There were two blows struck. Rus- sell hit the masher and the masher hit dreamland. “[ thought Jack Dempsey was in N'Yawk!"’ blurbed the masher when he returned from the” land of lyres and coocoos. “He is,” soothed a copper. “Then that musta bin a truck that slammed me," he mused on his way to the hoosego youR CURIOSITY IMPORTANT DATA. “How does a man fall when he struck heavily on the head?’ asl Cosmopolitan's pufficist. ‘‘Does he drop like a log or just crumple up like a bit of burning paper and sag into nothingness ?"’ We didn’t know, either, until George MacQuarrie, who plays a prominent part in ‘Find the Woman,”* Arthur Somers Roche's latest fm, wised us up. During the action MacQuarrte struck on the cranium with a cane: He wilts and slithers to the floor, “Why do yeu fall like that? manded the director. “Because that is the way a man really falls if hit on the head,” an- swered MacQuarrie. ‘I know, because I spent a lot of time around a police station and used to see the cops pre- pare the wild prisoners for a ‘regu- lation bandage.’ They didn't drop from the blows, they just slithered.’ And so it stays in the film, de- ED WYNN, HE SPEAKS. Ed Wynn, ‘The Perfect Fool,” led rumor down into the recesses of his cellar last night and bottled it. He says he hopes the patent stopper he clamped on sticks “You may say for me," chirped Ed, “that I most emphatically will not desert the musical comedy stage for the movies, despite the talk that @ floating around. rm “It is true, however,” he continued, “that a big film concern made me an alluring offer to act in a picture ver= ston of ‘The Three Twins.’ The offer was three times as large as any offer I have ever had because I would have to play three parts at once in order to be ‘The Three Twins.’ But 1 turned it down.” SWALLOWED A CAN Futt OF SHELLAC! ae = CUT-BACKS. yhen Margaret Marsh finishes her present picture for Willlam Fox she is going to dabble again in the speakies. Muriet Frances Dana, the “four= it,” has an impors tant part in “A Fool There Was,” orchy's Ghost,"’ a hair-raising experience of Torchy with the Coo Cook Klan, is the latest in the Torchy comedy series, Hundreds of sailors, headed by ranking officers, marched a mile to a theatre to see 'The Battle of Jut- land’’ film out West recently. Scott Sidney, with the aid of the buckingest ‘prop’ steamer in cap- tivity, has been working his Christie com sat night. The next Chris- tie comedy will be a sea story called said the two kinds; “You're wrong, too!,’’ manicurist. ‘There are and others."”’ Which merely goes to show that .nything can be proved from the point of view.—Richmond Times Dispatch, pa BELATED INDIGNATION. Manuel, a Negro with a record hitherto clean, was araigned before a country Justice ot the Peace for 4 sault and battery Why did you beat this man up, Manuel?” — ques- tioned the squire. “He called me sumpin’, Jedge."’ “What did he call you?* led me a rhinoceags, sah—a “A rhinoceros! When did this oc- ur?’ “Bout three years ‘go,’ Jedge. “Three years ago! Then how did it appen that you waited so long to re- I aln’t never seen no rhinoc- eros till dis mawnin'!"~-Everybody's Magazine ae . THE MISSING CHICKEN. POPULAR Oleahoma City sales- * mpanied by his Ww as e entered the dinin room of a Tex hotel famed for its excellent cujsine, Mary Carr, the most famous His order was served promptly, but shart’ of them’ all, cwilll staan the fried chicken he had been telling} (i on a new pictil his wife dence. The dusky waiter, leaning over that they unconsciously ad- | and bringing his mouth in close one another as tac ‘ proximity to the salesman's ear,|\jyoq + ; P A Jean de Briac, playing a French | @ eure mean, de A acl Canadian in “Over the Border,” 1s [Bg wo'k ean no pen nace the father of the famous de Briag UM Jal twins. He admits he cannot te DIFFERENT WAYS OF MEASUR.|{hem apart. He admits, too, that hé ‘Ostriches are not the only birds CORRESPONDENT sends us} who ought to hide their heads,” muses A the following little anecdote] Aesop's Film Fables i ra y e's “Once Upon a Time,” sighed Major HAMAD TACT TES) Jack Allen, “there was a flapper Who ready wit: On oni address the Chairman, thinking to be funny at] son on he face; but I haven't seal the speaker's expense, said in intro-} rer et nag right up In meetin? ducing him, “I had heard so much|and allows as how George C. Druce about Mr. ally expected to meet a big man in every sense; but as you can sce he is very smal} in stature.” Lioyd to find,” man is disappointed in my'size, but this is owing here of Wales we measure a man from chin up, him from his chin down." After more personal ren seript, “Where is my chicken?” he asked somewhat irritably. “Any Old Port.” so much about was not in e within the neg and Dore Davidson so often together in father roles in recent month Vera Gordon have appeared mother and not tell them ANYthing. ING. didn't wear coat, light nebra sh colored ring Rock hat, a polo sport stockings, lookless expres~ © occasion when he was to a meeting in South Wales, s and a Ldoyd George that I natur-]of Oxford and the Royal A pologt« cal Institute is wrong when he avers Salome an t and not a dancer wonder who'll win the argument Ernest Palmer, cinematographer of “Qne Clear Call,” reports he was lost in a blizzard on the Mojave Desert, He'll be blinded in a Klondike sands storm next Wandered over Fort Lee way yes | terday, As far as movie activity was We George arose, he said, “that am grieved your Chair- to the way measuring a man, you have In North but you evidently measure that the Chairman made no! concerned, the studios are a8 vacanty lp, Boston Tran- and almost as cheerless, as a lash year’s sardine can,