The evening world. Newspaper, January 23, 1922, Page 24

{ | { - sooties tly PARE Se oath sagan ree ape eee ae $$$ ae AY, JANUARY 23, a By BIDE took a day off Saturday an went up the Hudson seeing the sights, Somewhere about noontime we arrived in Poughkeepsie nd decided that was far enough to bo for one day. So we started out look- ing for things of int it. First of all We dropped in A dining place for some Junch and, of business, made the acquaintance Bob, an old Negro waiter. Evidently Bob perceived that we were from the rural districts, for when he had served us our mock turtle, he politely uske “Has yo’ ben in town Jong, sah “Just got in,’’ we replied. , hunt mused Bob. h ben heah thihty yeahs. “Ts that so?’ we replied, deeply in- terested. “Yes, sah! Ah knows "bout dis heal ole town. Y evatheng.”’ “Oh, by the way, Bob," we asked, “how do you spell the town's name through the channels of Then evatheng s, sah Bob looked a bit worried. He | fated. “Yo' means Po'kipsie?” he asked. “Yes."* Bob thought de & moment, “Well, sah,’ he confessed, “Ah des ain't tell yo’. Yo" see, Ah ain't nevab had ter spell it yi As we left the dining pluce we saw a big auto truck, bearing flaming banners, coming down the street, In it was a husky young fellow wearing & red sweater, The bonners an Niounced that ‘The Mischief ers’ with 16 pippins—count ‘em, 16—would be at the theatre that night that Daredevil Mott of the troupe Stood ready und willing to pull this auto truck half a block using only bis teeth. Quickly we discerned, f Daredevil was the gent in the sweate and, plunging into the crowd, we waited fora thrill, W was set Daredevil descended (ro truck, took & rope in his teeth and, bracing his feet, yanked the very devil @ut of that big, sheepish aut Jus thirty-four. Vassar chickens ston us—girls, were in the crowd looking | on and Daredevil was almost vicivus itt his determination to please’ After the truck had given in, the crowd cheered and Daredevil accepted the homage with « couple of bows, We Purely by accident, we you - were surrounded by Vassa of them, at the finish, tu other and said: “Nell, 1 betcha that lad trained on | your fudge." | | met Over at the Star office we Fred Lucas, a newspaper man who | knows everybody in ughkeepsic, Wappinger Falls and other opporturity Wp that way. He greeted us pleasantly and introduced us wo the whole staff of the newspaper, in- cluding a couple of mighty st | | | cities of looking girls. The telegraph opera- tor.seemed flendish!y glad to meet us, "T read your stuff in The Evening "he sald, We thought we noticed his fist | clenching and began to try to think | of a recipe for plac telegraph operators, started 1o call him, It was duty tM fore pleasure with him, and we made our escape. | Fred Lucas followed us out on tie sidewalk caplaining that he, at leasi had nothing against us and invitie us to accompany him to the Dutch ens County Jail to see “an ever be-remembered sight." We we along an! soon found ourself behind the bar's with some other tough-look- ing customers. In a cell-room we met Sheriff Everett BR. Davis, and then came tho sight. There in three cells Were pilea 1,400 quart bottles of whiskey. Jt. had been taken from autos speeding toward } Yor City from Canada, Four innocent- looking tuto drivers were in another part of the jail “The court,” said Sheriff Ds “has decreed that 1 shall destra vis, 610 bottles of this stuff Tuesday after- moon. Judge Motschuuser told me to pull the corks and pour out the whiskey. I had to bulk. At one cork a minute t would take me more than ten hours to do the job, and that's too much, So I'm going to take it down to the city dump and break the necks of the bottles on a rock." “The truth about the matter,” chirped Fred Lucas, “is that ihe Sheriff ix a Probibitionist and has never tasted whisk He feared the him stewe for him fumes would get make it and to go Fred. I slipped to my escort's side. “Hang off that sturf, will you? whispered. “We want to get out of this place, you know.” Fred looked cared, Then he cleared h voice and in a loud, firm tone said: “Mr, Davis is one of the best Sher- iffs this county ever had.” Again the Sheriff smiled, and in ten minutes we were out on the sidewalk I was glad and y ly sorry about something. “Now,” said Fred Lucas, “you un- doubtedly want to see Vassar Col- lege. I have arranged for us to make @ call on Prof. Burgess Johnson, in- structure in English literature.” “What's that?” :e asked. Imme- @iately we suspected ourself of a taux Ty, ‘ou’re a writer, " he said. “Do “Yon mustn't take my jok We found Prof. Johnson in his of- jee and bad @ pleasant chat with im, On the way through the col- lege We passed dozens of—well, to be frank, peaches; and oh, how we wished we were big and handsome like Hey~ ‘wood Broun or Strangler Lewis. We know a girl at Vassar and she was summoned. “fm delighted te see you," she About Plays and Players DUDLEY | “Dear boy,” writes Babe of York- | ville (get that, you guys who think jyou're lady-killera), “The Evenite | World is more to me than any other |paper, est ly the cglumn you | write, (Daw-gonne!) Print my rerly to Candidate - foc - Marriage Buster, ‘ vy, | want @ little space in | your column, If T ean'c have any in your heart.” Oh, persimmons, B: | Here's your answer, you bet! | Oh, Buster, Buster, Buster, Your pen now take in hand, | Cause I'm the little girlie For whom you've searched the land. | Light hair, dark eyes, just 5 foot $; Can cook and sew and dance. | Fd like to cook you something, | So, Buster, take a chance. Tf vou would like to meet me. Oh, Bus, write me @ tine I'll cook some dandy flapjacks : And, Buster, PU be thine, LITTLE MARY a RHYMED PROPOSALS THE BIG LITTLE FAMILY DEAR-ITS “TIME For TH" Dot" Oo CALL y MIXUP | BA-A-A-W-¢ IDROPPE D' SOMETHING On OY TSE AND SMas: AN’ DIDN'T NOTICE THE MISTAKE: Tit. TGOT HOME. IT'LL BE Jus te LIKE MY LUCK To. GET |S SMASHED. OR SOME THIN'— THE BOSS'S HAT AED iT Y'dONT LK MY Ger-uP EH? WELL .1'M JUST Goin’ OUT “To WORK ON “THAT BRAKE BAND “THAT STICKS FOR GOODNESS saKe. "| Don'T LET ANYBODY WOMEN ARE FUNNY — ALWAYS THINKING ABOUT ‘Looks’ ‘+L DONT CARE HOW’ 1 Look Jus' SO Mm WaPPY — WHAT © DIFF'RENCE Does IT MAKE ANYHOW ? HASNT SHE Come ouT OF Hea “SEmi-,, CONSCIOUSNESS J) IT SMASHED iT = : ( WES“SHE HAD A Luci" MoMENT A LAL WHILE AGO-SHE CALLED. Me A FATHEAD! Your TSE ISNT SMASHED - [ i HEY FELLAK - iF You've Gort A UTTLE SPARE TIME -1 NEED SOME “THINGS DONE ON MY CAR WF You'D LIKE. To Do THE WORK It: Makes a Lot of Diff’rence! SAY + can't y'see i'm workin’ ON MY OWN CAR ?!? “Havent Y'GOT ANY EYES: — Do ft 106K! LIKE A MECHANIC PI? AN’ ABSOLUTELY REFUSED To TAKE LYouR MEDICINE ~ Next Scene Deleted! ie a BUA 5:5 iT wAS YOuR You Don T A UNDERSTAND ai \T ROLLS UNDER / TRUCK, THIS OLD Cost ME A 3081S ov, {7G IF T DON'T CATCH THAT DIP BEFORE ) WIND IS GONNA T WONDER \F THE BLOKE WHO SAID "NEVER GIVE UP" EVER TRIED CHASIN' A DERBY For Bie Cord PLATTER THAT Gor SMASHED And Then Ferdie “Blew Up”! “Two MILES | — main only a short time and the situa- tron was cleared up nicely, Thea Frof. Johnson was reminded don't know why) of a story “One time,” he said, ‘my rich brother gave me a fine fur overcoat. At firat I was delighted, but very soon I began to realize that it was a white elephant. Jt was so elegant that every time 1 went out I had to get my shoes shined and my hat brushed and wear a clean collar in order not to mar the picture. One day I went into # cigar store and, as was my custom, stopped near the five-centers. The clerk, seeing my coat, insisted on wait ing for me over by the fifteen-centers nd finally L had to blow fifteen cents for a smoke. ‘That settled the coat 1 saw I'd have to discard it or give up smoking, and I chose the former course," ‘old it, eh?” came from Fred Lucas. “Yes, after a fashion,” replied the piofessor. “But even then it brough* me one more plece of hard luck.’ What?" asked Fred Lucas. 1 lost the ticket," said Prof. John- son mournfully, jed into eating a devil and —well, just ‘'wow" will be enough A devil at Vassar consists of thick layers of chocolate cake, were invels lov- and decorated with and marshmallow * . . . . quid An obliging taxic: fbbed sweetly. ‘ot going to be Sere long are yo) ado that we could re- us on the train for New York. night we drowned cwo ingly surrounding a gob of ice crear chocolate driver helped | Together” at the Hippodrome ‘to-day That that 1,400 Vassar! called “The Land of Imagination,” in-| gifs had us in a corner and were | taking their turns at forcing us to eat devils. We KERN-CALDWELL’S NEXT. “The Bunch and Judy," a new] musical comedy by Jerome Kern and Anne Caldwell, will be produced by Charles Dillingham next fall. Mr, | Kern will write the music while in| England next summer, Miss Caldwell | already has prepared a synopsis of the book and will have the lyrics ready before Mr, Kern sails, AN UNUSUAL PRODUCTION. | The Theatre Guild is to make an unusual production. It will produce | Shaw's ‘Back to Methuselah" in| three sections, each division to run a week. When all three have been given the cycle will be repeated. “In the Beginning," laid in the Garden of Eden, and ‘The Gospel of the Broth- ers) Barnabas" laid in London at the present time will be the first section The second will consist of “The Things Happen,” laid in London in |A. D. 2170, and ‘The Tragedy of an |Blderly Gentleman,” laid on Galway) first section will open at the on Feb. 20; the second on and the last on March 6, Methuselah,’’ as a play, been offered the public, HIP HAS NEW FEATURES. Two new features will go into “Get wick eb, 27 “Back to has never JOne will be, a big ensemble number cluding @ ballet known as ‘The But- terflles and the Bees." The other is “Some Street in Some Village.” It wi introduce the Hippodrome Quar- tet and the Happy Hobves. R. H. Burnside has prepared both features GOSSIP. William Courtenay and Blanche Yurka will be in W. A. Brady's "The Law-Breakers."* Several Broadway theatres were still collecting a tax on free ticketa last week. “The Blushing Brid the new Cecil Lean-Cleo Mayfield show, opened in Washington last night. Al Goodman has quit waving the baton for Al Jolson to be general musical director for the Messers, Shubert. Bessie Barriscale and Howard Hick- man will go.into vaudeville undes the Joseph Hart direction Ed Wynp has written another for “The Perfect Pool." Ka mighty funny comedian Hana James has bee After that we went through the| Bay, in A. D, 2000.‘ “As Far as/ta: jeading feminine role in college, visiting the grocery store and| Thought Can Reach" will be the third | Pigvon,’ being produced by Edw | finally the candy kiteh There we| section, It is dated A. D. 31920, “The | Geman Marilynn Miller and introduce a n ater” in “Sal te n by George Ask Her Father," is ed ing offered in the Proctor houses by Mitton Pollock, Miller, a ood Morning. Irving Wisher manufactu will Jeane” the twen- w Kern song called | by Kilbourn Gordon, Inc., for a role in “The Cat and the Canary.” A exander Carr is to appear In Shu- bert Vaudeville soon in a rewritten version of his play “Tobblitsky.” Melissa ‘Ten Eyck and Max Welly, dencers of ‘Up in the Clouds,” wiil go to Paris In June for @ return engagée- ment at the Folies Marigny. Icdward Bok is to deliver an address soon to the members of the Keith Boy Baad, their relatives and friends at the band’s club room over thé Alham- bra Theatre. This is in line with KE. F, Albee’s plan to give the boys a free course in American citizenship. A THOUGHT FOR TO-DAY. A small boy who saw “He Who Gets Slapped,” at the Garrick, Satur- day afternoon, sald later: ‘'Shucks! That guy don't know nothin’ about gittin’ slapped." | FOOLISHMENT. | Pretty Mary, Aged fourteen, Soaked old Grandpa In the bean, Knocked him silly With a poker. “Gee!” said Ma, “The child's some joker.” FROM THE CHESTNUT TREE. “1 made a cane-seated chair last week."" “How long did it take you to find fth time to-n Wiorence Eldridge has been engaged the holes and put the cane around | them?" TOO MUCH CEREMONY. HE battalion was resting beside T the road toward the end of its hike. After the had eased their packs and sipped from their nearly empty canteens they watched dis- piritedly the en- ergetic setting- up exercises be- ing gone through by a strange out- fit in a nearby field. “what's that there gang?” inquired Private Hanks of Oklahoma, without enthusiasm, “Infante | plied the sixteen-mile Weary macchers Candidates’ School,” re- ‘orporul. ; “Candidates! Infantry candidates! exploded Hanks, “My gosh! Do you have te make application and be in- itiated to get into this mess now- days?"--The Home Sector. eee { EASILY PROVED. ye a mill in Boston the workers were having a discnssion about who was the quietest man they | knew. They got a minder to |Then they got their thin} atus to work, to thinks quietest man theyvknew act as judge. ing appara- no was (he Many bun- THANKS, FRIEND -THAT'S MY HAT — YOURS BLEW uP THE OTHER STREET) dre@names were mentioned, ‘The judge was about to give his decision whep he saw a minder who had never mentioned one. The judge then said: “Neaw, Jack, does tha not know any quiet man “Well,” said the minder, “I think 1 know just one.” “Well, out with it,” sald the judge, “Weill, I think owd Bill Kite the quietest mon I know.” The minder looked, and then they all exclaimed at once: “Why, mon, he's dead!" “I know that. I think | quietest mon I know. spoken to me for nearly years!"—London Tit-Bits, e's the never. ——— WASTE OF ENERGY. (udse.) N-Arizona cotton grower, in dis- charging one cf nis negro hands, was lamenting his hard wek. “Cotton has gone to the dogs this year, George—I'm a big loser.” “Yassah,” returned the reckon you is, boss.” “And," went on the grower, “I’m out all’ the money I've paid you for and'the grub you've eaten be~ agreed the darky, “T guess you is, white fol “Weil, confound you,” growled the grower, “you don't seem to be worry- ing your head any “Lawdy,” returned the darky a bit of use of me an’ you bith worry darky, “I in’ "bout the same thing, is they?” |shown in different church OBLIGING. Warren W. Lewis, publicity agent for W. W. Hodkinson, doesn't haye | to stick to-pictures to get a laugh Once in a while he finds something to amuse him, even in the subway “I was waiting for a shuttle train from Grand Central to Times Square, quoth Warren, vhen an elderly woman, evidently car-shy, timidiy asked the guard: ‘Is this a Tocal of an express? | “The guard turned to her with a leonine growl and shouted: ‘Dis is a shuttle train—yez can make anythi out of it yez want. What the L do I care what yez eall it?’” A RECIPE. “How to resist a kiss"? is one of Gs sub-titles in the latest "Topies of tvs y" release. It coos: St gle fiercely, ‘appear to be overcome. cyes, register anger, sorrow, and joy. Struggle occas: | you nd—he wiil you then graduaii.’ Close your despel ally to t.o2 probably kiss elf aint | SOWERS IS SWEET. Dan Sowers, carrying weight to ‘age, and who hasn't seen the toes uf lis shoes for years, is busy play) cne of the parts in support of Erm ‘Lruex in “Stick Around.”” Dan is known for his iirth and is always ready to by forth into laughter, yhat's your name?" asked Try first noticed Dan laughin, Sowers!" answered Dan You sonnd awfully sweet to nm. ot back mnie, Now th Wer, not fast—that's misles ing.--But they are frionds. SOMETHING NEW. used to hear- dealing more or bjects, being but we think ‘Aesop's Film Fable" of the Hare and the Frog is the first out- and-out comedy ever shown as a part of a regular church service. It all happened in First Congresa+ We are sorter gettin ing of dramatic films less with Biblical twenty” tional Church in Chappaqua, N. Yo where Rey. Dow Beene reported the experiments a huge success. But anything is liable’to happen in Chappaqua, STILLS, (400 Gallons Capacity.) Margaret Seddon has had heart failure so often in films that she fears it might become a fact. Marshall! Neilan has bought the rights of Hugh McNair's “Fools First,” 8. E, P. © Shooting will start next week in Hollywood, Guy Bates Post and Henry B. Wal- thall are both referred as “The Mansfield of the Screen.'’ Wonder how the late Richard Mansfield would have felt if he had been press agent ed as “The Wally Reid of the talk- ies" ‘Teddy,’ Mack Scnnett's dog star, was seriously hurt the other day when he fell from a tree, Just what a dog was doing leaping from bough to bough is not explained by the Sennett DP. but Teddy will re- cover. Hilly Bevan (sounds too much like Bevo for most.of us) believes in ex- ercise. He spends a great doal of time working out in the Mack Sennett gym. Shooting of “The Robin's Nest.” Ben, Turpin’s next release, has been postponed because of a death In the star’s f ts, but the chef of a cer- Eats tain bi medy corporation has the bulge on any in Los Angeles. Hun dreds of visitors attend dinner every day just to hear the actors enjoying their meal. \ Dick Barthelmess, Lillion and Dor- othy Gish, Creighton Hale and se\ eral others who appeared in ‘Way Down Kast" will atiend the opening of “Marjolaine’? at the Broadhurst to-morrow night to, honor Mary Hay |(Mrs. Dick), one of the principal pinyers. Charles K. Harris isn't a bit ashamed of ‘Ashamed of Parents," his latest film, William Farnum’s first picture since his vacation will be released under the Stage Romance."* Mary Carr is still sobbing through another mother part at the William Fox studio. Lupino Lune, English non-speak- ing actor, is busy on,;"'The Droker, C = a