The evening world. Newspaper, March 16, 1904, Page 16

“mecc" we THE » EVENING w..WORLD'S » HOME # MAGAZINE w. WwW h { D GBS HOO 9909 OGD GOOD OGHEDOEHI CHOHOSOHODHUP IED YUE EEE VED) PHOSPHO YY IOGOVPDDIHCGHHOEVOSDD PLODPOCOOD OG S POTHOOO DD Most Admire |} Only M | A@iorld | Most Admire |} The Great and Only Mr. Peewee. ; re: Compan 0 8 4 . ' MpuPh Hew, New Tork. Entered at thw’ Forme in Women?! THE MOST IMPORTANT LITTLE MAN ON EARTH. aN —_ ‘ici Senet ar atl $ Design Copyrighted, 1903, by The Evening World. VOLUME 44... a By 1 Mr. Peewee Gives Miss Tootsie Sixfoot a Lesson in Physical Piper and the The Evening World First, | Nixola: Greeley-Smith. |; we i sa ening 2 rarities : : (rimseh nornine Une Bx fT CAM DO TH Police Force 57 ‘Number of columns of advertising in The Te d W ‘ede | D pn) NE tem, Sin bropas Tima, re Quy SropeinG ve of Chicago. Evening World for 12 months, ending Teh By aC? reac WoW ABE CHEEKS! I NEVER GET. | February 29, 1904.........000006+ 12 518% if | Number of columns of advertising in The g worth? | 4 Piper, who used to help Commissioner Greene 66 SEH,” said the Cigar Store Man, “that Capt. i woman | A run tho police force in this town, has been ’ + Evening World for 12 months, eadirg santa to know, And 4 (Zan REGULA Eyl HOW doing some gum-shoe work in Chicago.” February 28, 1903. PICO ets Rt se ston eee \ weist “He's a wonder at finding out things,” remarked the, { depending largely on which of the very dosizable qual- | ittes she herself ponsenaes Tt is the same old Man Higher Up. “The reformers put him in the depart- ment in New York to uncover the corruption, and what did he do? The frst chance he got for a leave of ab- sence he went te London. “He found out all about the London police. In the, 3 ;short spell he put in breathing the London fog he Z ; |learned more about the London cops than he ever knew 5 i = > ‘about the cops of New York. When he came back a/ Gers é 70 > !he put into effect his famous rules of the road, which, ouiTo ES 4 ®|provide that all horses drawing carriages shall be in WHICH RAlse LUMPS 2 | front of the carriages, coming and going, and that street Bue E Cant » | cars shall stop on the O. P. side of the strect. INCREASE........ 4,261% g \ ‘This record of growth was not oqualled by any ‘4 \ newspaper, morning or evening, in the United States. r |story of Churley Lamb and the two ha brother Ittersteurs whom he heard dis-| i THE SLICER AGAIN AT CENTRAL PARK, |custine the personal apnéarance of , * Shakespeare. A beautiful New York—yes. A mutilated New) “my tdeu of Shakespeare.” wald the fork—no! first, who was large and very dark, “Is r ‘ that he was a man of goodly propor-} , A chopped-off Central Park—not while the mt¢-| tons, with durk complexion nnd hairs” Topolis keeps a level head for its widest interests and a| “Strange,” said hia red-hended com-| panion. “My conception {is nltogether a trong defense for its best institutions. ve different. To my mind the great bard A ‘ The proposition of the so disinterested gentlemen ¥a¥ a man of ruddy complexion and NKING * who wish to supply New York with a greater Fifth ania untae te “Following this, he had a truck driver arrested for getting in the way of his automobile, and he wound up MORE one SRE ment with a minister of Brooklyn. his career as a police official by getting into an argu- ‘ ‘And = mine," the diminutive PA 4 q ivenue by cutting a ninety-foot strip from the east side tek with the slight title fee seat UR OF HORSES “e ] “A man who had roiled out such a bunch of New ss ry ty Piquaney to his specch, “Is that vi vie Cl i 2 hy of Central Park will be declined with due acknowledg- Sicuedvents ana pei eet eg CK. York results was pie for the Civic Club of Chicago. They : ‘of its impertinence, with an im-mp-pediment in hin apeech!** . - hy, rad have reformers in Chicago. too, you know. Oh, yes! The, Women are so given to similar 6s- In one of the battles of which it is proudest, The} maces of what constitutes womans World saved the west side of Central Pazk from spolia- CHE tbat ane anawes not far wrong 0, In discussin e problen: jon by the Speedway builders, The movement then] Winn a pretty New York girl the other | _efeated was backed by Richard Croker, at the height 445, auld Geamairingl: "a of his power. The bill authorizing the outrage on the] you know you divide women into three FE ark passed the Legislature, but public opinion forced | "lastes—beautitul women, charming women and Me.” ts recall. 5 Yet men thems The present scheme has scarcely higher merit than | capable of deci question of what Chicago reformers have recently stung the Chicago citi- a zens, until the temperature of the community is up to F THE EVENING FUDGE >| 105. ‘They are arresting people in Chicago now for ex- for Moth You have seen ~ » | pectorating on the sidewalks, and the Tobacco Chewers’ Lessons for Mothers: the THOUGHT- League has organized a movement to bulld the gutters The Whangdoodle, closer to the curb lines. To Say Nothing of the Lop-Eared | MOTHER “Of course, Capt. Piper found out things about the sein abenster. Gna Here dely »| Chicago police when he started in on his Sherlock ~ Holmes stunt. He had to make good for the setback he , ' ' + you realize that this mother watdlag WRONG te the | handed ,to thé reformers’ treasury. His discoveries H ' are not mor the momentous | oman's most fas- | 4 a the other-to recommend it. It is no less a plan to raid clnating attribie, for 1¢ Ia a subseut \4 Correcting her child and showed herself to be of a lower showed that 500 Chicago policemen are cowards; that ss upon which no two men are ogres, | a + ss and divert lands dedicated to park purposes and needed | "yn whlch fo two men ate Aare ordeg than the IFBANGDOODLE ete LOBSTER Pe ai most of them are old women; that they go into saloons jor those purposes alone. . at once or be shot they would prob- would you TER Charm, But ' » jon post and try to hide thei 3 Its slipper and {ts Little ta rbiylbest Pp Ty to le their numbers when citizens alaed bsteretie i} > Discretion should warn the promoters of the ninety- ably chorus unanimous behaving? make a holler to them. Probably he didn’t go out on the i: ‘ if one persisted and waked them to) @ [ . [EXERCISE YOUR MIND ON OUR BAC 7 0 ' West Side in Chicago and see the monument thi ng ot grab plan that the cheapest time for them to quit] expiain what they mean by charm | $ UR BACK BAGET > rs If the WHANGDOODLE placed its progeny upside | . .) oe there would follow unenlightening sl- | @ HE EVENING FUDGE, down on its parental lap and whipped it ? 1 citizens of that town have raised to the memory of the ¥ $ before a fight is forced. fee i$ ‘NING HORRIBLE! If this evere done, the tittle whang- | coward cops who were killed in the Haymarket riots. a Pressed for a definition it might be- $ Goodie and the lobsterctte would lose all thelr SPIRIT ‘ “Pollcemen are policemen the world over. They will CHICAGO’S INDIGNANT POLICE. come Mabel's eyebrow, the curve of By employing imported detectives, said to be from Alea ety tie way Parana Joke % when sho tlt eal on one elde an Sew York, the City Club of Chicago has made the dis-|ymiies through. half-shut lds \$ vovery, 80 it avers, that Chicago's police force is bad.| But none of these constitute a recipe ¢ for what every woman worthy of the Not that any idea prevailed that, in a moral sense, the Peat tuealacre. thor moet denirablele and INDIVIDUALITY and become DOODLEDGOS and ! crawfish, 4 Think of this tit! you become Tred In the face like a bolled lobster—and then think o! US and our advice. ' WE KNOW more of these things than any one else ! go into saloons, chey will hide their numbers and they * will eoidier on their beats. Capt. Piper says a lot of f policemen in Chicago cut up with disreputable people, but he don’t make his charges specific. The Chicago A tm the ENTIRE WORLD, and we to have ' H/ “| cop is no angel, but it is characteristic of amateur 4 + sBFee was especially good. dower she can possens or acquire—the| 2 PASSED forbidding parents te cares hel prtreelt +| doctors of civic problems to burl bad repute at the hs Bo'sweeping fs the indictment that ft 1# used as the/magic power of pleasing men | without first consulting the BVENING FUDGE. ’ honest as well as the dishonest. public servant.” s basis for demanding the discharge of 500 men. They| She knows this quality ts not beauty.’ P Oh, mamma, won't you buy me an Bditor like that ? ' “Do you think that tharesult of his investigations SVE are accused of sharing the spoils of criminals, of accept-/F 0" does not the husband of the moat () 1 gation: pe . (s stunning woman of her acquaintance among the police in Chicago will make the force there any better?” asked the Cigar Store Man. . “If it does,” replied the Man High:r Up, “Capt. Piper will make more of # hit in Calcago than se made at Fudge’’ Iatotorial Was Written by M. Sedler, No. 391 South Third St., Brooklyn. 3 |%™* 5 PRIZE PEEWEE HEADLINES for To-Day, $1 Paid fot Each: No. 1-OSCAR B. SCHUBERT, 57 Cranberry?) Is This the Original Mrs. Nagg ? : Street, Brooklyn; No. 2—-NEIL MciINTYRE, Eleven Years of Age, 152 Fourth Avenue, Brooklyn:? \ , ‘ogues, tolerate such as are afraid, The demand for in-|1s not to the Igdy's fortune, but to her! No. 3-F. G. TALIAFERRO, 256 West Fortieth Street, New York City. ; restigrtion is imperative. But will the tim{d 500 be|genuine goodness of heart. The world) % : : ¥ : ¥ : + cared at that too? reales es Pudsoritioeaapesi tos rl » . To-Morruw’s Prize Fudge Idiotortal Gook, “Is There Any Good Reason Why Mosquitoes Should Freeze?”’ ; recommend thom. AS TO SHOOTING STARS. A charming woman may be beautiful ugly, learned in books or only in “uring & recent performance in a loca! theatre some- tka ears ways, good or otherwise— ody in a box shot at a group of actors in the centre of|ine one intangible quality of charm is) ae stage. As yet there seems a shade of doubt as to| what draws amen tol ior ange [teen whether the cartridges that interfered with the play-| "ether Pe xP ae ing @ part of the earnings of the depraved; all of which|negiect his wife for a little, red-he: f| will be regarded, shocking as the admission may be, as| freckled thing with nothing but a fine) ten rather a matter of course. Ana eort of climax there is|smule tnd a dimple or two to recom: D a tm allegation that the deficient 500 are cowards. = * Nor ts {t intellect. ‘There would not Here the limit is reached. Policemen can stand the|be so many unmated thoughts wasting . ordinary denunciation,’ but not the taunt of cowardice.| thelr sweetness on the unappreciative : pn'a club it it were! Nor will the public, womewhat inured to, untformed|™r 1, Nomene lun Tans I ae vemos ‘To the Editor of The Ev 1 herewith req n to kindly stop imitating my wife as you do In your able articles, “Mrs. Nage and Mr. —" What right have you to muke capital out of my wife's dis- agrecable disposition? It is too annoying to have one's home Ife published in a daily newspaper. Evidently Mr, McCar- ° 99 [2 | dell writes under an assumed name’ and is one of my neigh: rning After. p | bora. OF THE VICTIMS. \ 4 Killed Editor’s Hunger. ie World: “The Gold Gray Dawn of the ‘Mo M. Meyer, the editor of the Paris Gaulois, the offices of rright’s climax and substituted another were blank or which are over a cafe, is suing the landlord and the pro- rall-bearing. SOME OF THE | prietor of the cafe for damages. He complains that owing Phooting at people on the stage {s reprehensible. While ‘ tre may be acting so bad as to call for some BEST JOKES to the gastronomle smell which arises from the cafe neither he nor his staff can get through thelr work, while they have all lost their appetites. Bs sxpression of resentment, the worst hamily demands OF THE DAY. ey ‘apital punishment. Effective rebuke may be ad- ministered by way of the box-office. q Assuming the gartridges to have been blank, and the A POSER. oe lead rescued from the scenic effects placed there in ad- er Sonia ithe keadart vind vance, still there 16 palpable fault. When a press agent otories to her, ‘wae ‘oo In 26 ark?" : decomes more spectacular than the show it is time to) “Certainly not, my dear,” replied the By tend in a police call. old gentleman, i -J See | "Zen," continued the small Inquisitor, “MEN OF DESTINY.” | uornratabre oo det dwound?'—Chicago ‘The Rey. Parkhurst is alarmed at "Men of Destiny,” HIS LUCK. y iting the President as an example. ‘ She—You, say. you are unlucky at! 4 It is fair to judge Mr. Roosevelt by what he does as} cards? f in individual and an official, rather than by the cfreim-) MeoVers. heesiauieeans itance that usage classes him as a “man of destiny.” |auppose?”’ \ i if The plain truth is that every man {s a man of} “Tam. I've nover been marned.— Jestiny. Whether himestate be high or low it {s the; Yonkers Statesman, The Baby’s Name. es HCAUSE they've named the baby aftar me Br= going to try--nay, I am going to be More sweetly gracious, loving, true and kind And strive for more nobility of mind— Eecause they named the baby after me! ‘The tender graces that I hope to see In her ll gain, that she may learn of me, Thus she and 1,will live my life anew, With no unworthiness a-peeping throygh— ‘4 Because they named the baby after me! ' Dear little one, they named you after me! Oh, may your path in life untroubled be! And may you tread Life's path with blameless feet, Until the long, hard journey 1s complete! And may you have the gifts denied to me! ry ‘ product of conditions not created by the man himeelf, or FLUCTUATIONS. Bailes eer arts gestheee| of qualities within him for the implanting of which re- abt oath ibid gor se 4 ‘And by the tears with which my eyes are wet eponstbility would be hard to fix. ee phn aldy Sevesinpeaer ait 3 Your life be cleansed from folly and regret, ‘ A man of destiny goes to the White House, and an- ‘Tis winter once again. Thou little one! They a See RONDRAD other man of destiny goes to the poor house, while a : —Washington Star, \ eee i ¢ third pauses somewhere between. And each is as much HIRSUTE ECONOMY, \ man of destiny as either of the others. Bildad—Doesn't it make you sad to If growing bid? ‘% The Boy—This story tells fifty seme deneed Ch a mewsebscacterisalion, Eliphaz—On the contrary, it rejoices| @ different ways of shocting bears. The ‘Cub—Here goes for a back- / somersault dive! DPOTSTS3- English War Humor. Champagne has a limited A B C, ime. ‘Think of the money Tam gong] @ The Bear! a'pose it's one of, / 4 : Ursue—Stop! Don't you know? (From the London Sphere.) , VICTORY |! to save on hair-cutting and hair-oil!—| $ those books they use in schools to And it’s R-E-M-O-R-S-E, there's a law against going swim.» It appears that Major-Gen. Leonard Wood is again cript. @ teach the young Idea to shoot. ming in-your bear-skin? 2 ousily engaged In the manufacture of a military record. eseees: oe 0000090000000 > a 0600006 y BD 3 “ @ ae PP MVEPHOS LDS POOOPOOOIORTDD £$0-00000000064 6 Thia time he has added to the glory of our arms by the| Phe God of Good Luck, | = ~ : AR ee o2Ge a e <a oe: storming of some Moro outworks and the capture of ] 3 TT R U R Ss ry ND AN WERS 2 C] twenty-one aged Spanish cannon and thirty throe “Kan- L Gb B S, Q GB I EB Ss bJ takaé.”” He sealed his triumph with copious quantitii | 4 A West Side Observation. | dropped? Why must we New Yorkers) might refer to’denounce a father for fll- ; housekeeping, and would much rather 2f Moro blood, b ered no casi ft sen! Be To the Editor of The Evening World ; tolerate every old nulsance that comes treating his daughter, a seven-year-0l4 | do that on even the humblest scal: vale ut suff casualties himself. Sec. Columbus, Sixth and Amsterdam ave-| along? Repeal this terrible nulsance. | child. A CONSTANT READER..: | for the right man! But ste haa Weoee setary ft commented on this gallant feat by saying, nues—if any other thoroughfares of your| Let us again start thp ball a-rollin: « ” nm h H ip Pronounced “La-Zar.’ et the right man. Under the ciroum- ‘Lam disappointed at the news, because I supposed that, great y contain so many undertak-| and have the act repealed. ©. Y.R. | To the Editor of The Evening World: stances, can you blame her for “usury % ing establishments as do these three Vy Lal jhe Moros of that district were in a condition where; a) I've never seén them. Riding along In| “TB Vampire," by Rudyard Kipy|,,.VPat is the proper pronunciation of| ing” some man’s place? And—"'ther fet kind of thing was impossible.” The distinguished; on Sixth, Amsterdam and Colum-| ane ch e 5 Don't ail speak at fence! centre Secretary of War evidently underestimates “he farsight-, ia avoniies offe cho scarcely rales bib] EOE. ane (ASG MNF SU RODIN eon THIRTY SUMMERS. C eyen witha ner eT pe 7) - 4 _Anees of the Intrepid Major-General. What! Shoot TAME CHeTUnGRCtAiter censor oe Tia ee and so on? 1 don't} Where Could I have my voleo culti- ‘There Is No Métzon Star, PY the Moros at one fell swoop Into “a condition waere wonder, or why are so many places ec) bRew the name of the poem ar Na vated or improved free or at Buea ithe Fditor of The Evening World: kind of thing is. impossible?” Heavy: 1! thie gort strewn along those atroety? | suthor. oR i + | A says that thero fs an Faison star Frio utd bi ath Leg seven: farbidt) WH readers give opinions? Corbett Was Born 1866, Fitssim- Why One Woman Works. which wns put up by Mr, Edison, 33 a) e ing the Filipino goose that lays the BOSTONIAN. mons 1862. ‘To the Editor of The Evening World; says there is no such thing. Which is 0 er) Ya! will he. phe a Men often accuse women of lowering | ¢, 2 rat's golden eggs. No! The Moros will } . re correct? TESSI£ and ED, Loahially : Yea. Corbett Won tn 11th Ronnd.|To the Editor of The Fvening World: the wage'goala by usurping: men's places , ly preserved as are Mongolian pheasants. In- To the Battor of The Kvening World: Which ts the older, Robert Ffizsim- world, thus becoming Same Bottle ana Cork Query, Af they. wore too low the distritt may oven Wyo 16 Dia Younx Corbett. and Dave Sullivan] mons or James J. Corbett? In what Instead of helpmeets, Per eee ee ne rent na: toh ed with them, po that our general among surgeons Ny SA ee a SAT PIERNEY: Pall kachiachis Mi) Lode aaratan heal to some extent truer but | 1.49 iu readers to pnlve: If @ hottle and mi Me No. ‘ women alone for this state _ 8 ies see serersle may Secsudtatont intervals Riue for Boys Pink for Girl, | To the Raitor of The Fvening World: Men should not ignore the | con’ gpauter, cot £2.10, and ithe bottls See De of & Moro-drive, make a good elas The Exening, Worlds as Sully, the present pozealieg Sean’ tot that more than one-half the women | does the cork cost? x Hover nh enema ti Polteh uporl ‘his a baby boy—biue or pink? aa, | sme’ an. actor, An. played in “The| yl Erenieesdtin, Scare se alike mane aes rae eid ; 1° tye [i inte’ Quine specimen bb Tainetan ace RETA Are “Near-Bite”. Proteatst {Comer Grocery?" I, J. [ana we must ifvet . wnt wae ' orton} ‘The whole thing, put concisélv, my. dear, an equator, but the| Was-copied by 4 British offleer- with tho of The Eventne World: 8. P. ©, Gy No. 297. Roheth Aven ‘The writer {a drawing a salary that) BYTOM Jan: eceen 5 8D & coming Hiution and Russia, stmpl, whould be 1 a Thi mural pa.ni rotests against: thi Tet Bir se TUE pala i Ppl ase hie re Xet oho te x ote dit Be rg We gson ; = ey jenly boen entirely . Plesee tet -us Kady eo oftton,. sand proficient in pore’ viet ae