The San Francisco Call. Newspaper, April 15, 1906, Page 5

BY GEORGE ADE APLES —and Mr with is still lost was so he de- cide © go along w 1S, He said that he was foot-loose and ny definite it alw. el at home to with pe ople wt scare i, whate r puts out gold sign t n front and the test rom their Royal Majesties are the humble American Hats.—Wandered into a hat discovered, to my amazement, proprietor was the inventor of or concertina hat. Surprised; that st least a dozen i worked on it. Establishment had nts to prove that the first folding had been ufactured on the very rietor has not knighted—probably an oversight. er Pavement.—The large covered Savoy Hotel is paved with ft rubber three feel square. It ssion of cabs in and out of rubber deadens sound. Good i be used in all the streets of b horse comes along— rubber pa\«mem»is ver the asphalt—sud- ber and begins to ke a tennis ball horse’s eve and looks over his r and seems to be p against? Mean norse. Should be New ¢ e type of Eng- r bread and jam for music halls, ers—legs very above tops of shoes uses them to look thin e old enough rama.— problem ning—new play, but same old e. Each principal charac- y the person of the op- whom he she was Marriages did not inter- th love affairs, but helped to com- the plot. Discovered why we can ave a great pative drama in the have no open fireplaces in stroy the incriminating pa- Impossible to destroy papers at a team radiator. L. C. C.—In musical comedies, panto- mes and at music halls many sarcastic L. C. C., meaning London uncil. Councll is plowing open new streets, tearing down old buildings, . up new buildings and spending ey lke & saflor on a holiday. Their gance has given great offense to e low comedians and other heavy rate new mar: sex with or —we to @ payers, while the very poor pegple, who are getting parks, sunshine and shower baths free of charge, bless the L. C. C. The dress coat crowd in the theaters seem to have it in for the L. C. C., but they are very strong for Mr. Chamber- lztn, notwithstanding defeat. Mr. Cham- berlain seems to be a greut dedl like Mr. Bryan—that is, nearly every one admires him, but not enough people vote for him. In spite of protest from property holders L. C. C. is going bravely ahead with gi- gantic task of modernizing and beautify- ing London. Asked an Englishman why there was so much criticism of L. C. C. He said if you touch a Britisher in the regio his pocket-book he lets out a holler that can be heard in Labrador. Didn’t use those words, but that's what he meant. “Snowstorm.—Last night a few show- flakes drifted into Piccadiily Circus; hard- Iy enough to cover the ground this morn- ing, but every one is talki about the ‘snowstorm.’ London is aw ahead of us on fogs, but their snowstorms are very amateurish. “Coals.—Buying my coal by the quart— 4 cents a quart. If I fed the fire the way I do at home would spend $100 a day. The official who brings fuel to my room in a small tin measure Insists upon call- ing it ‘coals,’ but I Jdidn't think there was enough of it to justify use of plural. “Cgming Across.—The turbine boat from Dover to Calais ran like a scared deer and rolled like an intoxicated duck. Held to rafl all the way across, looking fixedly at oscillating horizon and wonder- ing why I had left home—bleak, snowy landscape all the way from Calais to Paris. After dinner went to music hall and learned that Paris could be fairly warm, even in the dead of winter. “Keeping Tab on the Cab,—The ‘taxi- meter’ cab is a great institution—small clockwork arrangement alongside of seat, so that nger may sit and watch the indicator and know how his bill is run- ning up. The indicator is set at seventy- five centimes at the start. In other TRVZLES - NG AT TERSLEY TN PASTUIRIE 1S STILL WITH VS = vou owe 15 cents before you get Then it clicks up 10 centimes at a time, and when you reach your destina- tion there is no chance for an argument regarding the total. What they need now in Paris is a mechanism to prevent the driver from taking you by the roundabout £ “Just for Fun.—Strange epidemic of kiiling in Paris. Two or three murders every night, not for revenge or in fur- therance of robbery, but merely to grati- ‘Hooligans,” it is said to be*quite the fashion for ambitious characters to go out at night and kill a few belated pedestrians merely in a spirit of bravado and to build up a reputation afmong their associates. Seems unfair to the pedestrians. At one of the theaters where a ‘revues,’ a hodge- podge ‘take-off’ of many topics of current interest, was being represented the new type of playful murderer was represented ag ‘waiting at a corner and shooting up, one after another, some twenty-five citi- fy a morbid desire to take life. Among zens who chanced to stray along. This certain reckless classes of toughs, or performance was almost'as good as the e Buffalo Bill show and gave much delight to the audience, “Costly Slumber.—From Paris to Mar- seilles is about as far as from Chicago to Pittsburg. Sleeping car fare is about $10; total fare by night train, about $30. Two cents a pound for all baggage in excess of a measly fifty-six pounds. No wonger people travel by day in the refrigerator cars and try to keep warm by crawling under hundreds of pounds of 'hand lug- gage’ Anything with a handle to It is ‘hand luggage. Some of the cowhide Continued from Page 4. e e e e i killed him, now they will kill us—those wolves nf his,”” he whimpered. “You coward! You thought all was lost before, but I would not yleld! As soon as I saw the wretch's weakly body, his thin wrists, his pallor, the idea of this trick darted into my mind. I told myself I could not fail! I have won in spite of his subtlety and power. Felipe, you will remain Governor, and I shall be your wife! Are you not happy now?” But Majada made no response, he only gaped at her as she stood over him flushed and splendid in a storm of tri- umph. Suddenly an odd expression cross- ed his face, his mouth fell open blankly, and,” before she could comprehend what this meant, her wrists were seized from behind. She wrenched her hands toward her breast to free them, and looked back over her shoulder into the face of Don Q.! “Help, help, Felipe!” this time the cry was an agonized appeal. But Majada stood heavily apart. A shrill whistle from the chief brought his men up. He charged them to strictly bind both prisoners. “You have condemned yourself, sen- orita,” Don Q. said. *“Had I not been cn my guard—" he stooped and raised his hat from the ground, the knife transfixed through crown and brim. She sbrugged her shoulders and laughed bitterly: “I had hoped it was your heart!” “It would seem that you and Don Felipe have been partners in a conspir- acy against my life,” pursued the chief. “Down in the plains you permitted yourselves to compass my death. I am able to inform you that the soldiers still wait for my coming in the gar- dens of Segll.” ¢ Dona Rosita’s eyes flashed, “I should have retrieved that disas- ter i the blood running in this crea- ture's veins were not milk,” she pointed at Majada. “Now do as you like with us. “What does Don Felipe deserve at my hands?’ asked Don Q. “Spare me, spare me! cried Don Felipe, given over to fresh apprehen- sions. Don Q. held up his hand for silence. “You deserve to die.” He paused, “but tnis lady loves you.” 2 “No! He is a coward. T would kill him rather than marry him!" Rosita cried hotly. “Lady, you have courage enough for two; thus, when you and this poltroon are made one that will be no hindrance. To become his. wife has been your de- sire. You deserve punishment as cer- tainly as he.” " B “But 1 have heard you never hurt a ‘woman,” she protested, “True. But when I can give them their heart’s desire, which occasionally serves my purpose equally well.”” He turned to Robledo. “Bring thither tne good father. “I will not submit! I will not be the wife of Don Felipe!” she exclaimed. “Will you permit me to kill him in- stead?” inquired the chief sadly. She turned away from her fellow-cap- tive with a cold aloofness. “1 pray you to do so.” Don Q. considered her ment. - “You have shared his guilt; you must, punishment,” he said. for a long mo- bags must have used up two or thrae cows. . “Tea Habit.—The tea habit has struck Paris. At Grand Hotel and many cafes general round-up about 5 in the afternoon, every one gulping tea and eating cakes. Not as demoralizing as the absinthe ha- bit, but more insidious. “American Music.—After a ‘coon’ song has earned 2 pension in the United States it comes over to Paris and is grabbed up as a startling novelty. All the ‘revues’ studded with songs popular at home about two years ago—Frenchmen believe that all Americans devote themselves, day in arq day out, to accumulating vast wealth and singing coon songs. “Oysters.—Went to famous fish and oyster restaurant for dinner. The Gallic oyster wears a deep blush of shame and tastes like the day after taking calomel. Thought that horseradish might improve, modify or altogether kill the taste, so I tried to order some. Knew that ‘horse’ was ‘cheveau’ and ‘red’ was ‘rouge,’ but could not think of the French for ‘ish’ so I had to do without. Somewhat dis- couraged about my French. Almost as bad as former American Consul, who, after eight years in Paris, had to send for an interpreter to flnd out what ‘oul’ meant. Have got ‘merel’ down pat, but still pronounce it ‘merecy.’ MARSEILLES. *“More Snow.—The further south we go PLAIN WATE, / 10 CENT A A GLASS DI AR of song heard in London. Lady whose husband has a misguided ambition to be a painter and induces her to pose every day in the back yard scantily attired (she, not the back yard). This painting to be his masterpiece, and he labors on it for many months. His wife, In re- counting her experiences as a model, Te- marks: It’s all right in the summer time; But, oh, oh, in the winter timel BEverybody says it is the coldest snap that Southern France has known in many years. They saved up all their cold weather so as to hand it to me when I came along. “Bouillabaisse (spelling not guaranteed) —There is only one thing to do In Mar- seillge, and that is to drive out to an excellent restaurant built on a rock over- looking the bay and partake of bouilla- baisse. Dish famed in song and story. Mentioned often in “Trilby.” Possibly that is what ailed Svengall. The bouillabalsse and the ‘Marseillaise’ were both invented in Marseilles. The mayonnaise comes from elsewhere. The bouillabalsse 1s a combination of soup, ragout, chowder and New England bolled dinner. There are many ingredients. It is said they put in whatever th have the most of—sea bass, lobster, crayfish, vegetables, sauces —everything except the license. TLiked the taste very much—first when I ate it, and then all during the afterncon and evening. » “Chateau @'If.—Coming out of the har- bor we ran very close to the Chateau a'lf, a stern fortress prison topping & huge rock rising sharply from the bay. Count of Monte Cristo was imprisoned here. Man on board sald that the char- acter of Edmund Dantes was wholly fle- titlous, manufactured by Dumas. Must be a mistake, as I saw the small rock on which James O’'Neill used to stand at the end of the first act and exclaim, “The world is mine!” It is exactly as rep- resented on the stage, except for the cal- cium light. NAPLES. *“The Ship’s Barber.—Coming across from Marseilles In the dampfer (German for boat) the weather moderated so that I needed only one overcoat. Got ae- quainted with barber. Often have some trouble in making up with a captain, but can usually hit it off with the barber- hood. Barber is a bureau of Informa- tion, headquarters for scandal and knows what the run is going to be. The barber on our dampfer no good. Shy on com- versatfon, but great on arithmetfe. Charged me two francs for a shave and when I suggested that he was rather high he sald he was compelled to ask one franec and thirty centimes for the ex- tract of vanilla he had put on my hair. Told him I did not want any extract of vaniila, but he said there was no way of getting it back into the bottle. Besides, he had the money, so we compromised by permitting him to keep it. Said he longed to go to America. I told him thers would probably be an opening In America for any one so energetic and muscular, and 1 promised to give him a letter to A mour & Co. of Chicago. “Free Fireworks.—A full 100 miles out at sea we could make out an irregular oval of fire suspended in the sky—the two streams of lava now trickling down Ve- suvius. Finest landmark and salling target a sailor could ask for. When we werg forty miles away we wanted the captain to slow up for fear he would run into the mountain and Injure it. Next morning In harber we discovered that we were still ten miles away from it “The New Naples.—In ten years Naples has done a lot of sprucing up. Streets are cleaner, new and pretentious buildings have muitiplied, smells have been elimi- nated. Guides, beggars and cabmen not so tiferous as of yore, but stiil bad eno to deserve electrocution, provided some more lingering form of death could not be substituted. Cabmen seemed down-~ cast. Municipality recently forbade any extra charge for cab service on a ‘flesta,’ or holiday. In Italy 300 days out of every 365 can be rung in under the head of ‘festas.” Every American who landed in Naples found himself right In the midst of a ‘flesta’ and had to pay two fares, or as much as 30 cents In gold, to ride around in one of the open hacks. Thirty cents would seem a reasonable charge, but not after you have seen the hack. The smaller the horse in Naples the heavier the harness. Evidently a desire to have about the same total weight In each case. “Emigrants.—Alongside of our ship lay a German steamer about to sall for Amer- jca. The tender made trips to and from the dock, and every time she came out she was filled to the last inch with Italian \emigrants. We saw hundreds of them disappear into the ship, 5o many it seemed they must have been packed In below by hydraulic pressure, otherwise there wouldn’t have been room for them. All headed for the land of the fvee to build railroads. Englishman wanted to know why there was such heavy emigrant traf- fic at this particular season. Told him they were hurrying over to vote at the April election in Chicago. He believed it. Come to think of it, I believe it myself.” This is Mr. Peasley’s note book up to the present moment, just as we are de- parting for Alexandria. He admits that he may have overlocked a few minor points of interest, but he more than made up by neglecting to mention Napoleon's tomb or the Moulin Rouge. Since arriving in Naples this morning Mr. Peasley has arranged with the tour- jst agemey to change his ticket, and he will accompany us to Egypt. (Copyright, 1906, by George Ade)