The San Francisco Call. Newspaper, February 11, 1906, Page 13

THE SAN ~FRANCISCO SUND CALL: QLU RKarfnerine Mo aLon AID a f s nome. She says it is her right to rest - mo- as she pleases, and no doubt it is—but s there will come when her pride Kk vese will be d she will regret her s lifrer v she and her maid w s to get the opu- s onable orsets. Not long s A ut secured a divorce from his q week incompltibility ss a8 t she did not nget nails in essed up at 1 enough for i yet she had plenty of dinner gowns, active man nd sons, owns and negli- intil the Jast mo- the afternoon Ar dre inex- MAR S N G S D D N L b B B DB LI P SANGSTER { PARENTS G S G o G T o TG LT TR B S S G SO S SO B % t wou! men into a tyran nclusion that heltered un- f cannot invariably think a it be sirable that they es ! gnant peol is a menace o S b e . g water ning over the iy rocks is a pledge of wholesome life in the A stirless day, when no breeze less stim than a day € pie, be winds hc jubilee, Move- b ¢ sion, even friction of the d to development of the e know without bicker- may express hout inflicting hey may continue to think diffe ently, and yet iive in tranquility, if they evers , p m “It takes two to make a guarrel; one ak P Iways end it P - st my politics,” expos- & s e A band, who was an old- ed Democrat, to his wife, who wom may < a radical blican. k ¢ ing oft handle on slig I accej dear,” she replied, “but sior When opposite forces my political sentiments are an inheritance great need to from them father, more i than I cannot change any an change the old proverb— he en’'t a vote.” of us who have no enthusiasm o subject of universal suffrage are honest man’s opinion. And yet, if ever American women in an insistent majority should demand suffrage, Amer- ican mew will have too much gallantry to deny.Jthem, and none of us anticipate that any frightful domestic calamities will ensue from that cause. ' entire Common sense and mutual good feel- murmured, “that the prey what will e m tinue human and imperfect unbroken they are there serer and agreement in any home under the sun. An with due regard for the effect of i gentlemsan once boasted that he had quarrels upon the children, will usually ed with his wife fifty years and they Prevent distressing squabbles in the home. Hot-tempered peopie are prone to say more than they mean. Tactless folk rush into mistakes. But love is a solvent that prevails to blend the most diverse ele- onotonous. ments, and to concillate the most ob- Another man complacently asserted that stinate, & r Speaking of obstinacy, thousands of years. “If she pre- people confuse it with firmness. They and I prefer biue,” he explained, fancy if they cannot be moved from nce of opinion. commented a friend, “but very had never had a differe Very plain-epoken Sc we s settle the matter by com- a position either by argument or per- prom on the blue n_oby y suasion that they are showing ten- easy »d this was, if wife were acity of purpose and strength of will re fice her own desire and ef- to an extent that lifts them above their fellows. Often instead of firm- ness these people are simply display- ing the temper of a balky horse or the dividuality. A long course would spoll the most reasonable of d make him sz were the absurd steadfastness of a mule that other way and refuses to stir a sten. We mav ba ob- S stinate in holding fast to a prejudice, because of overweening it An ability to see another: side of the shield, to look at s from a viewpoint that is not ¥ our own, goes far to reduce ob- y to its lowest terms, and make: people agreeable comrades on the road. Note that a character amounts to lit- tle which is without co right and wrong we st tive ideas and maintain them with: firmn About questions of policy or expediency we should be open to persuasion or concessions from others Whether or not married folk agree they should not.let wrath and bitter- ness creep into their lives. If argu- ments and discussions breed dissension they would better be walved. " Anthony Trollop wrote a brilliant novel in which the herc, a man of wide reading, good family and gentlemanly antecedents, always knew he was right. His mulish cy was the rock on which his wife’s heart broke, and which wrecked: his domestic peace. If people do quar- rel by daylight, let them forgive and forget before they sleep. The vicissi- tu of life are too many, the trials too inevitable, and life itself is too short for any of us to spend it in fool- ish quarrels. There Are very few of us who do not somectimes need to remind ourselves that we would better be patient with our living ioved ones. The circle shall not always remain unbroken. While we are together it is worth while to trample down our selfishness and live with those who belong to us in some- thing better than mere peace and resig- nation, in real joy and gladness and in frequent yielding little rhings that the great thing in our life may be love. Nothing stamps a home more surely as sweet and refined than entire econfidence between parents and children. Still, in every household matters come up which should not be discussed in the presence of juniors. This is especlally true when, as sometimes happens, the older ones are talking over questions that concern outsiders—neighbors or friends. If, unfortunately, something comes to light about a family in the community which that family would naturally prefer to keep to Itself, it is to the last degree unkind as well as unwise to make any allusion to the subject In the hearing of children. The difference between children, so far as curiosity is concerned. is very marked. An inquisitive child who is also se- cretive will linger about, quietly ob- servant. hanging eagerly on the con- investment. Particular women who do their own housework use a uniform simi- lar to that worn by trained nurses, in striped gingham, chambray or calico, the ~skirt and waist made in one band, so that there will be no parting at the waist, neither will the skirt drag upon your back. Have comfortable slippers with moderately high (not French) heels, and do not wear the same slippers in winter that you do in summer. If your floors are cold use a cloth-lined slipper, or even one lined or edged with fur. A neat stock, SORT OF HanrE ATTIRE T7HAT DRIVES AU SBAND AND - 5 . SonNs NEGLIGEL Faor Bow o2 HELR. versation of father and mother, only e half understanding what she hears, and, perhaps without knowing the ex- tent of the mischief she makes, will repeat scraps that she has heard to the undsing of the parents. No one can pe other than mortified if her friends are told things that she has said at home, which were never meant for the public ear. The little pitcher is often a little critic. One of these children sald to' me: “I cannot understand mother. She saw Mrs, — coming down the street, and she sald to Aunt Charlott ‘There is that old cat, I am afraid she is coming here. She always chooses the most in- convenient time, and I can't bear her anyway.’ I expected,” went on the child, “to see her treat Mrs. — very coldly, but she was just polite as she could be. She sald: ‘Dear Mrs. —, how glad I am to see you,’ and a great deal more. If I tell stories, I am pun- jshed. But what can I think of mother?” ‘What, indeed? If you are going to be a social hypocrite you would better keep vour little pitchers in the nursery out of sight and hearing of your de- ceit. All the precept in the world will not make children truthful if they have object lessons in 1yIng set before thelir eyes. . Not a great while ago, a beautiful golden-haired little boy, scarcely four, startled his mother by calmly uttering “Why, exclaimed the mother, in dis- “Where did you hear such a word? Do you not know that It is very, very wicked to use such words as that?"” an oath in the middle of his play. Harry may. “Why,” sald the child, with honest eyes fixed on her face, it can't be so very wrong. Father and Uncle Fred often speak In that way.” Children are creatures of imitation. The words they hear they repeat. Evil is not evolved from the recesses of their own hearts. It comes upon them as part of the stain and sofl of the world in which they live. A great deal of harm is done to children when they are left in the care of irre- sponsible end incompetent hirelings. A mother careful of every breath her child draws sometimes seeks for it a nurse who is foreign-born, with the very laud- able desire to accustom the child’s ear and tongue to French, or Germon, or Italian, so that it may acquire the other language side by side with its native Eng- lish. Unless the mother obtains for the iSRelaxarion and fhe rather than a soiled ribbon eor a bit of frayed lace, will complete the general air of tidiness. The stocks, like a man’s to cross in the back and turn over onee in front, can be ‘made from bits of madras, plque or fine cambric, and should never be starched. If you can snatch a second to tuck a knot of black velvet rib- made bon in your carefully brushed hair your husband will carry away most pleasing picture. The must always figure on one factof in her husband’s life—the trim, well-groomed, tidily dressed business girl who works at the counter or desk next to her husband’s. Thigk of her when you are tempted to with him a wite of to-day don a cotton erepe kimono fit only for the rag bag or to knot your hair without combing and brushing it for your appear- ance opposite your husband at the break- fast table. ‘The woman who does her own work and is persuaded to buy a real, true French negligee in soft China silk, Valenclennes lace and ribbons, must bear in mind that this dainty plece of frippery (and what woman does not yearn for them?) must be kept for its own particular purpose, re- laxation in her own room, or as a protec- tion to the shoulders while dressing the hair, and performing other mysteries of the toilet, It is not Intended to be worn while doing heavy work, as it soon be- and soiled. Neither Is it warm enough to wear when through rooms of. various temperatures and particularly If cut low at the throat, it Invites pneumonta and other pulmonary diseases. The lie between housework frocks and negligees should be drawn comes stringy passing child a nurse who is pure-minded and sufficiently well educated to speak her own tongue with precision, she may be doing the child a great injury. It is no advautage to infancy to learn a corrupt and barbarous patols, Instead of a pure and elegant language. If, In addition, the nurse be rough and untutored, and with- out scruples of a conscientious order, the little pitcher will very probably be filled to the brim with ideas and thoughts that are anything but clean and wholesome. The imperative cry of childhood is for scmething to do. Therefore, so soon as the little one emerges from the dawning mists of babyhood and becomes an inde- pendent personage, with exactions and de- mands that are to be met, the kinder- garten should open for it a new world. In the multiform plays and tasks of the kindergarten, with the little tables where clay may be molded and beads may be strung, and patterns pricked into paper with pins, a child steps into a fascinating realm of its own. Children who are care- fully taught in a kinderzarten and who 'GR(OMEDJOMAN /ipee s flufty sleeves and casca s no place in the kite It is neither cleanly ner safe and many a badly burned hand or or singed eye es can be traced s or & negll- er a gas stove. clearly. Tk ace b arm, to the loose, flowing gee worn while working The negligee plays a very Important part, however, in the of relazation. v day's work is done, and you fee! aghour for that very ou can spare yus cause, the upbullding of your and health, lay aside your houseworking dress, take a tepld sponge if you have time, put om loose underwear and a negliges hung en- tirely from the shoulders and relax. Re- lax completely. Do not plan on mak- ing over your nun's velling for little Suste; do mot try to catch up om your reading for the woman's club; do net wonder whether the deliveryman from the bakery will bring the eclairs on time— think only of rest. Be utterly selfish with your muscles, your nerves and your brain. Lie tlat on a couch and If your feet are raised on a pillow all the better. This position Is eminently restful to organs which have been strained by your strenu- ous morning at work. Devitalize. Ralse the fingers of your right hand with those of the left and let them drop lmply. Re- verze the movements until the fingers are Ump and lifeless. Next devitalize the wrists, the elbow and blades, the tces, the ankles, and 30 on until your body seems in the condition of a doll t has lost a fair proportion of its sawdust filling. If some one in the family has time to assist you, she can start by massaging the face and neck lightly or brushing the hair and then lift the fingers, toes, etc. This method is practiced at a college famous for turning out healthy as well as gifted girls, and is in charge of the physical culture depart- ment. If you are weak and exhausted, drink a cup of hot milk before relaxing. If you have been doing mental work in- stead of physical try light exer- cises before relaxing, notably swaying or bending at the waist line, but relax for a few at least half an hour every afternoon. Do not imagine at any tonic or stimulant will take the place of needed rest. ur heart does its marvelous work be- e it has an inflnitesimal rest between throbs. The girl employed downtown during the déay should relax befors retiring at night. She owes herself a pretty house gown, and if she changes from her office gown and cors to an empire corset and a corresponding house dress, she will be more than repaid for the time it takes. Instead of crawling into bed, thoroughly exhausted, she will find herself interested in a book, or what other members of the family may be doing, and retire an hour or so later with her business cares thrown aside and her mind in a restful pose (Copyright, 1906, by T. C. McClure.) - KA P e e Of are allowed plenty of time for outdoor play, who are healthfully active all day and who go to bed early at night, are not in much danger of becoming cbjectionable little pitchers. For the children's own sake, they should not too early have burdens laid upon them that they cannot bear. A woman who has children of her own told me that when she was a littls thing of six she was In the room when makes ne difference how they look if they only behave well, but if mamma be vain and Inconsiderate they will probadly fl{ her rather than obey her precepts. and Horace will not have finer ideals honor than their father. I have heard the father of five sons, between the ages of 4 and 14, relate with positive glee a story of gains that he had made through over- reaching another in a business trans- action. The little pitchers have big ears. They drank in the shameful tale. It would be too much to expect that later on they should go forth into life with s noble standard and a high ideal of Integrity. Look out for the little pitchers. It s worth whily