The San Francisco Call. Newspaper, December 26, 1897, Page 13

~ ALAMEDA COUNTY NEWS. PASTOR HATCH AT THE BAT Berkeley Preacher Who Played Baseball on Christmas. A Brother Divine Vigorously Condemns the Action as Desecration. 1 Rev. George E. Swan Thinks It Is a Day For Worship, and Acts Accordingly. BEHRKELEY, Dec. 25.—Members of the First Congregational Church of | Berkeley attended a baseball game this morning on the university campus and watched with delight the clever work | at first base of their pastor, Rev. | George B. Hatch, The game was | played between teams from the Pres- | byterian and Congregational churches, | and the proceeds went to the boys' club | of West Berkeley. ‘While the Congregationalists took in the ball game the congregation of St. Mark's Episcopal Church attended divine services at their church, where all - day devotions. were conducted. Rev. George E. Swan, the pastor of the church, had vigorously denounced ball- playing or kindred amusements on Christmas day and had urged his flock to fittingly observe the sacred feast by going to church. “Thanksgiving day,” said Rev. Mr. Swan in his Christmas sermon last night, “is regularly desecrated by ball games and similar amusements. Christ- mas day, at least, the most solemn of religious festivals, should be given over to religlous observance, and, accord- ingly, to-morrow we shall have all-day services in St. Mark’s Church.’ | Rev. Swan made no personal allusion | to Rev. Hatch, or to the members of | the Congregational and Presbyterian | Churches, but inasmuch as the inter- | church baseball game had been pretty | well advertised for some days past! there can be little doubt as to whom | OBJECT T0 THE STAMPS FLEEING NORTH Merchants’ Exchange Is | : Ready to Fight the | System. Director Brown. Makes =a Statement of Its Evils. Has Already Been Denied Footing in Many Cities. Oakland Office San Francisco Call. 908 Broadway, Dec. 25. The Merchants' Exchange is prepar- Ing data with which to go before the Council to back up its arguments in favor of passing an ordinance prohib- iting trading in stamps. The introd tion of the system is causing great interest, which is increasing daily. During the past few days many com- plaints have been made that the stamp | a | His Friends Exerting Themselves to [LARBOURNE NOT The Alameda Librarian Visiting a Friend Near Pleasanton. An Extraordinary Proposal to Meet His Shortage by Subscription. | Place the Embarrassed Man on His Feet. Oakland Office San Francisco Call, 908 Broadway, Dec. 25. Librarfan Harbourne of Alameda has { not gone East and is not headed Klon- | dikewards. He is spending a few days | with a friend on a ranch near Pleas- | anton and quietly waiting until the scandal of which he is the central fig- | 12! ure has blown over. One of hls! Alameda friends gave out these | facts to-night, and also said that no | A his remarks were directed. ! The Congregational team won the | game this morning by a score of 19 to 10. Rev. Mr. Hatch at first base was, of:course, the center of attraction, and he was loudly applauded for his play- ing. - His batting was good, and he Ized out base hits as he is reported to | have done when he played ball at Har- i¥aFd, To his playing was due in large | nieagure the baseball victory for Con- | Erezationalism. | The “line-up of the opposing teams | a3 as follow | Position. Pitcher . c T Presbyterian. WITH A KNIFE An Oakland Politician Severely Wounded in a Saloon | Brawl. | | we at fi Leslia Blackburn Uses a Huge, Keen | Edged Blade on a Defenseless Foe OAKLAND, Dec. 25.—Leslie Black- bufrn; ‘the politician, and Pete O'Brien, anether politician also well known, had Ani encounter in an Eighth-street sa- 16&H to-night, and if O'Brien keeps his word:Blackburn will be served with a warrant to-morrow. charging assault with a deadly weapon. After the af- fair 'Brien was taken to the Recelv- fhg:Fospital to have a gash in his fore- tiead sewed up. The trouble arose out | of-some talk regarding a political posi- tion that it is said Blackburn had promised to get for O'Brien, but had fafled. O’Brien tells the following story of | the affair: *I went in the saloon and told Leslie that he was no good, and that hé was afraid to do anything. I called him names which he resented and 1 hit him in the eye. Friends in- terfered and carrlied him back and three of them held me by the arms and shoulders. While in this condition and | before any one could comprehend his purpose, Leslie grabbed a long sharp | knife and made a slash at me over their heads. It was a cowardly assault and. I'll make him answer for it. He | clafms to be a shooter, but I dared him un.” to;‘:snlalss gf O'Brien corroborated his gtory at the hospital. Mr. Blackburn who was the Sergeant-at-Arms in the | last Legislature, was hurried out of the-place by his friends. i FIREBUGS STILL BUSY. | Opportuine Frustration of a Care- fully Planped Attempt at @rson in Berkeley. BERKELEY, Dec. 25.—Evidence of another supposed attempt at arson was discovered this evening by Charles 1. Gilman, the janitor of the Chem- {stry building at the university. Giiman lives at the corner of Dana and Parker streets, and this evening he found close to his house a coal oil can with a fuse attached to it. It is t the firebug had made | et to fire the residence | yreparations ::drw:s frightened away or perhaps intended to return later and light the fus Gilman, after making the dis- covery, laid in wait patiently for the miscreant to return. Had he done 80 he would have met with a warm re- ception and the Berkeley police flutl;or- ities would probably have had one ess desperate character to worry over. e CAME HOME FOR CHl'ils;(’l"]h:)lAbSli LAND Dec. 25.—Fran ablin, nr?AexK—]umploye of the Selby Smelting Works, came to Oaklanl last night t‘(: spend the holidays with ni:?cl;;e %sog_ was late he took a rt“r:)emnlghL ow d dead in his bed There was fcate sul- mopolitan Hotel for morning he was foun with the gas turned 0;1(.) iod C about the room L :]lgz‘:id it is supposed that he “‘bod; the gas off and on again. His was removed to the morgue and an inquest will be held Monday evening. His parents live at San Pablo, AW DIRECTOR D. C. BROWN of the Merchants Exchange, Who Is gt | exchange is not redeeming the stamps for anything near the value the pur- chasers have been led to believe they were worth. Director D. C. Brown of the Mer- chants’ Exchange made a statement last night for publication that seems to show that the plan is less favorable to the merchants now than it was a month ago. “We have at last found the real evils of this system,” said Mr. Brown, “and they are much greater than even st supposed. The stamp ex- change is the only party benefited, and as it is an Eastern concern we do not see why we should cut our own throats that an Eastern firm may live and take cur profits. If the pur- chaser gets something for nothing somebody is robbed, and the system is more in the nature of a lottery than anything else. “The stamp exchange says it does not conflict with ordinary channels of trade because it does not sell any- thing. This is nonsense pure and sim- ple, for the merchants of Oakland pride themselves on the fact that they carry everything that customers can possibly need. Therefore, no ma ter what articles the exchange gives away, just that much trade is lost to some merchant or other, because even the stamp people will surely not try to make us believe that they are a charity organization. “There is no specific value to the stamps. The customer is led to be- lieve that he is getting a rebate of 10 per cent on all goods purchased, but this is a farce. say that they are at liberty to place any price in stamps upon the articles they have in their store and customers take stamps and find that it requires over 1000 to get a cheap watch worth not more than $250. One instance has come to our notice. A boy got 800 stamps and was told that when he got 1000 he would get a fine watch. He got the 1000 and was told | that the price of the watch had gone up to 1200 stamps. The lad collected 1140 | stamps -and by paying an additional 50 | cents to the exchange he got a sil- veroid watch that was appraised by a Jocal jeweler as selling at retail for $2 50. “These complaints are so numerous that the merchants are now complain- ing that the stamp people are hinder- ing business on account of the dissat- isfaction of the customers with the bo- nuses offered. This stamp system has been driven from Los Angeles and | other places. | and in the East its agent was fined | 8100 for practicing the system, and I | think we can keep such a demoraliz- | ing agency out of this city. It is an illegitimate method of trading and this | city can well afford to follow the ex- | ample of Los Angeles. There are twen- | ty-two dairectors of the exchange, and not a single one has voted in favor of | the system.” DEATH OF MRS. PROBST. ALAMEDA, Dec. 25.—Mrs. Maria Probst of 1350 Court street died this | morning, at the age of 78 years, of gen- | eral debility, dropsy and heart failure. | She leaves a husband and two sons. CUT WITH A POCKET KNIFE. ALAMEDA, Dec. 25—Wiiliam Ap- john and F. W. Reichrath celebrated Christmas last evening in somewhat uproarious fashion, and during a drunken row Apjohn cut Reichrath with a pocket knife, inflicting a slight wound. He was arrested and charged with battery. = FOOTBALL. ALAMEDA, Dec. 25.—The annual game of football between the young men’s teams of the Congregational and | Presbyterian _churches took place this morning at Recreation Park and re- sulted in an interesting match, which was won by the first-named team by a score of 12 to 2. In the afternoon the Vampires defeated the Soldiers by a score of b to 1. San Francisco opposes it | | serted his wife and children. The exchange people | | | | POSTOFFICE | ed bundles, packages, papers and bas- ————— | trouble would result from the shortage, | as Harbourne is too popular in the En- | cinal City to remain in difficulty. | A most remarkable proposition has been made in Alameda, that is prob- | ably without a parallel in municipal history in this State. An effort is to | be made to raise the amount of Har- | bourne’s shortage by public subscrip- tion, so that all possibility of criminal | prosecution can be avoided. This plan has gone so far that George W. Weeks, the proprietor of the Encinal, | has been asked to give the plan public- | ity and has consented, if Harbourne's | friends desire it. It is conceded on all hands that Har- bourne will never be prosecuted, and already some of the bills he left unset tled have been fixed un. There is a great deal of sympathy for him, and no one desires his prosecution, although it is considered safest for him | to keep out of sight. His friends will not give out the name of the ranch where he is staying, but they indig- | nantly deny the story that he has de- | At no time has Harbourne been more than thirty miles from his family, and al- though they were forced to retire him from the library, the majority of the trustees are willing to help him to get another position elsewhere. It is said | that Harbourne is not the real eulprit, | but that he has been led into his trou- ble by others. No news of the missing Ilibrarian could be obtained from Pleasanton to- night, but as soon as matters are squared up he will return home. OVERWORKED Glut .of Christmas Presents Causes Much Trouble in Oakland. Carload of Calls and Too Much Reg- istered Mail Overworks the Carriers. Oakland Office San Franclisco Call, 908 Broadway, Dec. 25. While every one else has observed to- day as a day of rest and reunion the malil carriers have worked as never be- fore. At 5 this morning many of them were in the office getting their regis- tered packages In shape and sorting their other mail. At 8 o'clock they breakfasted and then began the day's toil. Each one returned to the office with 2 horse and buggy, in which was load- kets of letters. Every effort was made to have the presents and greetings from friends delivered in time for the family dinners. Some of them took two loads, and still the office was crowded with late arrivals. After most of the boys had started the overland reached town with six pouches of registered mafl. This was more than the hard-worked clerks in- side could stand, for they had worked until 1 o’clock this morning and were at their posts again before 5. Post- master White and Assistant Martin were on hand to advise and assist, but at the sight of the overland they locked their desks and started for home, advising the registry and other clerks to do the same, which advice was taken shortly afterward. To-night the clerks are again working late, in hopes of catching up between now and Monday morning, when the next de- | midnight. | bers who have risen to address the | | speech, but whose orations did not get | beyond the preliminary, “Mr. Chair- livery will be made. The office vet contains nearly a car- load of the New Era edition of The Call. Every foot of room is occupied with stacks of them in sacks which have not yet been unlocked, while in the cellar are piles more of them. Yes- terday a special car was run out on the Haywards Electric Railway and two tons of the papers sent out.. Every effort is being made to clear up the congestion. “Never in the history of this office has there been so much mail handled,” said Assistant Postmaster Martin this morning while showing your corre- spondent through the office. ‘“Every trains adds to it and all we can do we cannot keep up. The late arrival of matter makes it all the worse to handie. ' The special delivery boys were worked nearly to death yesterday, while the San Francisco mail is more than the overland. The boys and young ladies have worked like Trojans, yet you see the condition things are in. Each of the carriers has hired horses to-day at their own expense and will do their best to get the presents to their owners. I don't know what it will be by Monday.” BENT u.y MASQUERADING. OAKLAND, Dec. 25.—Johanna Keefe, who was arrested about a month ago for masquerading in male attire, and who escaped punishment on a plea that she was only out on a frolic, was arrested again to-night. She is charged with being drunk, using vulgar lan- guage and being in male attire. e “CALIFORNIAN" STAFF NAMED. BERKELEY, Dec. 25.—Editor W. E. Creed of the Californian, the college daily, has announced his staff of asso- ciates as follows: Managing editor, A. H. Allen; exchange editor, W. B. Dun- associate editors, Duncan McDuf- fie, H. S. Symmes and Fred W. Dorety. The first issue of the paper will appear on January 12, and will be issued five times a week. BERKELEY NEWS NOTES. BERKELEY, Dec. 25.—A special mu- sical programme will be rendered at the Christmas services to-morrow morning at the Berkeley Unitarian Church. Professor Baldwin of the Texas Uni- versity will preach to-morrow morning at the First Christian Church. “The Royal Babe of Bethlehem" will be Rev. John Coyle’s subject to-mor- row morning at the Trinity Methodist | Church. Rev. Dr. Minton will preach at the First Presbyterian Church to-morrow morning on “The Meaning of Christ- mas."” ——————— An OIld Man's Death. OAKLAND, Dec. 25.—James Mec- Carthy, a peddler over 60 years of age, fell ‘'down a flight of stairs at his boarding-house on the®orner of Ninth | and Franklin streets to-night at about His neck was broken by the fall and death was instantaneous. Notable Short Speeches. Ti'1-Bits. | The majority of people who have at- tended the meetings of debating socie- ties, local parliaments and the like will readily call to mind Instances of mem- assembly, apparently brim-full of a | man—Mr. Chairman,” and then mem- ory failed them and they have been obliged to sit down. Still, these crude attempts answer a purpose, and the unsuccessful and short-winded orators have the consolation of knowing that they stand in very good company, as many eminent men have done no better | at some period of their career. The writer knows a gentleman who once came forward for municipal hon- ors, and when the evening arrived that he had to address the electors all he could manage to say was, “Ladies and gentlemen, you know me—vote for me,” and then he had to sit down and listen to the laughter and criticism of his audience. Perhaps the electors knew him, but somehow or other they did not vote for him, and the other candidates left him stranded high and dry on the day of the poll. One constituency tells the story of a gentleman who represented it for many | years in Parliament and who only once | made a speech. It was of short dura- | tion, for it consisted of, “Please close the window,” addressed to one of the atendants. Another story is told of a | student, who was well equipped so far | s learning was concerned but who was wanting In confidence and assurance when it came to displaying his knowl- | edge in public. To remedy this defect he used to go regularly into a garden well studded with cabbages, where he rolled out his sentences and fancied himself before an audience, even going so far as to address the green heads as ‘‘gentle- men.” After a course of a few weeks of this kind of training he considered | himself qualified to appear before an assembly. He did so, but after speak- ing a dozen words he became dumb, | and all he could blurt out was, “Gen- | tlemen, I now clearly see you are not cabbages.” These short orations, however, are not all the result of nervousness. A | Judge's charge 1s not usually of meager dimensions, but- there is one case on record which is an exception to the rule. Judge Foster once addressed the Grand Jury at Worcester in the following terse manner: “Gentlemen, the weather is extremely hot; I am very old, and you are very well ac- quainted with what is your duty. I have no doubt you will practice i The Earl of Rochester, distinguished during the reign of Charles II, once attempted to make a speech in the House of Lords, and it proved to be a short and singular one. “My Lords,” he said, “I rise this time—my lords, I divide my discourse into four branch- es.”” Here he stopped for some time, but at length added: *“My lords, if ever ] rise again In this House I give you leave to cut me off, root and branch, for ever.” Such a speech, nat- urally, caused much astonishment. —— e Poser for the Professor. Tit-Bits. It was at a phrenological entertain- ment and the professor had been illus- trating his lecture by inviting gentle- men of varlous vocations to come on the platform, and demonstrating that different habits of life were character- ized by corresponding variations in the formation of the cranium. He pres- ently came to deal with the criminal form of skull and desiring a subject addressed his audience: “If there is any gentleman who has ever been the inmate of a prison we should be glad if he stepped forward.” To this invitation a tall, thick-set man in the body of the hall responded, and rising from his seat walked down to the front. “You have been in prison, my friend?” asked the professor. “Yes, sir,” replied the tall one. “And how many years of your life have you spent there?” “About flve- and-twenty.” “Dear me,” said the professor. “Will you sit down, please?’ 7 The subject sat down on the chalr in the center facing the audience, and the professor commenced to feel his head. “This specimen,” he began, “is an excellent one. The indications of a criminal character are very marked; e HE S FRANCISCO CALL, SUNDAY, DECEMBER 26, 1897. 13 PACIFIC COAST TRACK RECORDS FOR 1897. Compiled hy the Racing Board of the California Associated Cucling Clubs. R. M. Welch, Chairman, Robert M. Welch, chairman of the ria Associated Cycling Clubs, has com track racing committee of the Califor- piled for The Call all the cycle track records for the Pacific Coast now existing, in both the amateur and profes- sional classes. The records will prove of considerable interest to followers of the sport, and should be cut out and kept for future reference. Record breakers who study the accompanying tables will find some vul- nerable points susceptible to their atta. the marks are very low and will likely 1o come, cks, while on the other hand some of remain where they are for a long time S. B. Vincent could probably get all of the flying start paced records held by Mussey of Los Angeles if he would try for them. The veason the pro- fessional table is not longer is because the men who made the long list of single and tandem records at Coronado in 1595, which still stand, are out of the State for good, and Mr. Welch does not believe in padding his table unnecessarily. The following list shows the dist. record: ances, name of rider, place, date and PROFESSIONAL COMPETITION—SINGLES. 1-3mile F. E. Schefski . 1-2mile Oscar Osen .. 2-3mile Otto Ziegler, Jr. S 1 mile Otto Ziegler, Jr........... GLE -Santa Monica, Feb. 22, 189... .Petaluma, July 4, 189. -San Jose, May 20, 1897 . ...Sacramento, June 6, 1897... PACED. MULTI-PACED. 1mile W. E. Becker San Francisco, Feb. 22, 1897, 2 miles W. E. Becke San Francisco, Feb. 22, 187 3miles W. E. Becker San Francisco, Feb. 22, 189 4miles W. E. Becker San Francisco, Feb. 22, 1897 54 Smiles W. E. Becke _San Francisco, Feb. 22, 1 154 MPETITION—SINGLES. 1-4mile H. F. .San Francisco, May 30, 18%4. 13125 i-3mile E. F. 5= 1, mile unpaced E. A. 3hmile paced F. M. Byme. "3 mile paced F. A. McFarl 1 mile (novice) paced W. E. 1 mile unpaced F. A. McFarland. 1 mile paced F. A. 2 miles, handica 2 miles, paced .San Francisco, Oct. .8an Jose, Se; 3, 1897. Eureka, Cal., July 20, 1895 1895, t. 9, San Jose, Julry 4, 1895. Los Angeles, July 25, 1 San Jose, July 4, 1865 San Jose, Nov. 9, Santa Ana, Nov. 27, San Jose, April 19, 1895, Los 3 miles, paced F. Angéles, 4 miles, paced F. Los Angeles, 5 miles, paced C. San Jose, N 6 miles, paced F. Los ‘Angeles, 7 miles, paced F. Los Angeles, 8 miles, paced F. G. Lacy Los Angeles, M 9 miles, paced F. G. Lacy. Los Angeles, 10 miles, if Los Angeles, 11 miles, paced F. G. Lacy Los Angeles, 12 miles, paced F. G. Lacy Los Angeles, 13 miles, paced F. G. Lacy Los Angeles, 14 miles, paced F. G. Lacy Los Angeles, 15 miles, paced Emil Ulbricht Los Angeles, 16 miles, paced F. G. Lac; ‘Los Angeles, 17 miles, paced F. G. Lacy Los Angeles, 18 miles, paced F. G. Lacy ‘Los Angeles, 19 miles, paced F. G. La Los Angeles, 20 miles, paced Emil Ulbricht ‘Los Angeles, 21 miles, paced F. G. Lacy ‘Los Angeles, 22 miles, paced F. Los Angeles, 23 miles, paced F. ‘Los Angeles, M 24 miles, paced F. Los Angeles, May 25 miles, paced F. _Los Angeles, May STA mile L. 8. Upson -3 mile Hardy Downing 1% mile L. S. Upson . .Sacramento, Oct. 11, 1894, 1 mile H. O. Jensen. .Salt Lake, July 24, 189%. 2 miles J. 8. Brereton .San Francisco, Aug. 22, 18 3 miles J. S. Brereton . -San Francisco, Aug. 22, 1896. 4 miles J. S. Brereton San Francisco, Aug. 22, 1866 5 miles J. S. Brereton. -San Francisco, Aug. 22, 139 FLYING START, PACED. 3% mile E. A. Moody... .Eureka, July 20, 1895..... 1-3 mile Canby Hewitt. it mile Peter Metcalfe . 1 mile B. Vincent. m, w? wRmm -Sacramento, Oct. 10, 1894 .San Jose, Oct. 25, 18%. .Santa Ana, Sept. 17, 1895, San RT—UNPACED. Jose, Nov. 9, 189%... Francisco, Oct. 3, 1807 Francisco, Oct. 3, 18 Francisco, Qct. 3, 1897. Francisco, Oct. 3, 18 Francisco, Oct, 1 s Angeles, Aug. s Angeles, Aug. When they reached the side of the room they began slowly to ascend the wall. Mr. Evans was so astonished that he rushed off to see a friend and begged him to feel his pulse, for he thought that something was wrong with him- self. ‘When he returned the stamps had risen half way to the ceiling and were still gliding upward. Happily for Mr. Evans’ sanity the square bits of red paper just then al- teréd their course and began to de- scend, and soon they were within reach of his hand. Then the mystery was explained. Tha moistened stamps had fallen upon a big fly’s back and had stuck to the In- sect, which naturally enough started off with them. —_——— Engagements While You Wait. A sea captain called at a village inn and asked the landlady, a young widow: “Do you know where I can get & mate? I have lost my mate.” “I am very sorry for you, Mr. —" she said, smiling. “I want a-mate, too, and cannot get one. As we are in the same position I'll tell you what I'll do. If you will be mine I will be yours!” He closed with the bargain, and the widow, keeping her word, he is now supplied with two mat A doctor who had saved the life of a lady, a personal friend, was asked his charge. He said he generally allowed his patient friends to remunerate him as they thought befitting. “But don't you often get disappoint- ed on these terms?” she inquired. “I may say never.” “As you are so easily pleased, here,” and she playfully gave him her empty hand, while in the other was concealed a check for a handsome sum. “How easily I could have taken you in!” she added, producing the check. “But you have only succeeded in drawing me out,” he said, declining to relinquish her hand. ‘“Don’t insult me with a check; I am most generously re- warded.” Perhaps she understood the doctor’s difficulty, and wished to help him out of it. At any rate the giving of her hand led him to offer his heart. ‘While in a tobacconist’s shop a gen- tleman asked a girl behind the counter, who happened to have red hair, if she would oblige him with a match. “With pleasure, if you will have a red-headed one,” she promptly replied, with such a suggestive, demure smile that she aroused his interest. Further conversation proved her to be a person worthy of regard, and eventually the red-headed match was handed over. —_————————— How It Feels to Be Blown Up. British Exchange, A miner, who was blown up while B D Mus f\flfiflfii :‘dg Bl blasting a rock, descztes his sensa- R. D. Mussey Angeles, Aug. tions thus: fi' B %}3::23 ‘ ::gg{:; fifi" “You see, it's so sudden. It's over R. D. Mussey s Angeles; Aug. just about the time you begin to un- s R. D. Mussey Angeles, Aug. derstand that something i{s happening. o 5 Ry & Angeles, Aug: You know, I had the satchel in my E T . e hand and put it down. Then I got R’ D ‘Angeles, afraid of it. All at once everything B Angeies, was light. I don’t think I saw the D % Auscloe flash. Anyway, my face was not ex- R D. 5 s Angeles, actly toward the explosion. But then R. D. Mussey s Angele: everything got light, lighter than day— B D Rumeey Dngsice Kind of blinding. There was an awful R. D. Mussey ‘Angeles, crash. Pé % l\{lusse) i s ;:ngn{t “it was just at the same time. I D A AnRoleS] was terrified, and wanted to get away. BB Musey el It was just as if T was having a night- 31 miles R. D. s s Angeles, mare. Somehow, though, I knew just 5 miles R, b Angcie, what the matter was. A man can 34 miles R. D. s Angeloa: think faster than he has any idea of. 3 miles R. D. Mussey Angeles, I knew that some of the others were N n D i s Angeles, A nearer the explosion, and I said to B oG D My I::fi;;s' myself, ‘They’re blown to bits, that’s 39 miles R. D. Mussey Angeles, certain.’ i, B De Musiey s “You understand, thlsnwa.s ’F:’l‘ in & = P v . second—all at once, really. en aole Dy e gl was exactly the same as if I had been 44 miles R. D. Mussey . | hit with a stick. I thought it was a D MEY big stick, bigger than any man could 47 miles R. D. Mussey swing, and that it must be worked by 48 miles R. D. Mussey machinery. It hit me on the head and e ool e -Los all over, and I went sailing into the air goh':&l: !RF'DPMI:};?:?. T a long, long way. My ears roared, and TANDEMS_AMATEUR T1 the wind blew into my face. I knew 1mile R. E. Dow, C. M. Smith..........San Jose, Sept. 9, 1 when' T struck ' the ground, for I re- Y Ganens "'"\'f"‘;ED' o member saying to myself, ‘Well, I'm, 25 1 ch, B. H. ancisco, Nov. 21, B ;’sn'\':'\'l’ VS A. e _y:g:(‘gff 2, “9:—,»1 1896 done for.’ ) 2 miles Geo. 3 miles Geo. 4 miles Geo. 5 miles Geo. E. Dixon, Charles Kraft.. Francisco, Dec. 5, Francisco, Dec. 5, an Francisco, Dec. San Francisco, Dec. the organs of self-esteem and benevo- | lence are missing, while that of de- | structiveness is abnormally large. I | should have been able to tell immedi- | ately without the testimony of the man himself that the owner of this skull had lived an extremely. erratic | and criminal life. For what crime, my | friend were you imprisoned?” | “I never committed any crime,” | grufily replied the subject. | “But you told us you had been an in- | mate of a prison for years?” “So T have, but I've never committed a erime.” “Why were you there, then?"” “I am a prison warder!” (Collapse of entertainment.) ————— England’s “ Forty Immortals.” Chicago Record. The ingenious efforts of the London Academy to found an institution o(i letters similar to the “forty immortals” | of France is interesting as a freak of | unconscious humor, but' it has real | value also as an indication of the status of British literature. The acad- emy has picked out its “‘forty,” and the list is much more successful than the jokes in Punch. It can be understood readily that Thomas Hardy, George Meredith, Rudyard XKipling, August Dobson, W. E. Henley, Andrew Lang, Henry James (what, by the way, is an American doing in the list?), Ed- mund Gosse and Algernon Charles Swinburne may be entitled to aca- demic immortality. Gladstone, Spen- cer and Ruskin might be included by virtue of their fame, though their first claim to distinction is not purely liter- ary. l'Xflowever, the outer world must be excused for admitting that it does not know why W. W. Skeat or W. P. Ker should be placed on the immortal roll. There is some uncertainty as to Aidan Gadquet and Dr. Salmon, and Ameri- can. readers will not feel entirely sure as to the pretensions of G. O. Trevel- yan and J. A. H. Murray. Mme, Sarah Grand and the author of “Dodo” seem to have claims superior to those of Mr. Ker. Even Alfred Austin, poet laureate, although his name does not appear on the list, has written poems which are immortal in length, if no other way. The scheme for an academy of Eng- lish immortals is all right, byt instead of making the number forty it should be reduced to about fourteen—or less. —————————— Prices of Wild Animals. The greatest animal mart in the world is at Hamburg, Germany, and the following are the current market prices for animals: * Female Indian elephant six feet high, twenty-five trained to do several tricks, carries six people’ in saddle, $1500; female ele- phant, five feet six inches high, no tricks, $1300; young, fresh imported male elephant, four to five feet high, from Burmah, $1000; females, $1100; ze- bras, five years old, per pair, $2000, and both broken to drive double or single harness; eight months old zebra, male, $460, and female three months old $350; Nubian wild ass, six years old, $200; wild asses from the Russian steppes, per pair, $900; double-humped cam- els, per pair, $500; llamas, 4 years old, per pair, $250; Axis deer from India, per palr, $20( Sika deer from Japan, per pair, 150; waterbuck antelopes, 2 years old (country not given), per pair, $750; Bengal tigers, male 6 years old, female 3 years old, per pair, $1750; Bengal tigers, female, 3 vears old, each each; striped hyenas, each, $75; slan wolves, each, $100; young polar bears, per pair, $450; polar bears, 18 months old, $650, and fully grown, $1000 per pair; young Russian bears, $150; African and Indian porcupines, each, $40; male kangaroo, $125; beaver rats, $30 per pair; male orang outang, 7 years old, $1500. —_—— Stamps Went for a Walk. English Exchange. A certain Mr. Evans stood in a post office preparing to post a letter and had Just moistened two halfpenny stamps when they slipped from his fingers and fluttered to the floor. Mr. Evans, who is a portly man, looked at them in disgust and then stooped to pick them up. Before he could put his fingers upon them, however, they began to move slowly away from him along the floor. He drew back and gazed at the spec- tacle with astonishment and terror. Rus- NEW TO-DAY. CONSUMPTION To THE EDITOR : I have an absolute Ci¥e for CONSUMPTION and all Bronchial, Throat and Lung Troubles, and all conditions of Wasting Away. By itstimely use thousands of apparent- ly hopeless cases have been permanently cured. S0 proot-positive am [ of its power to cure. | will send AREE to anyone afficted, THREE BOTTLES of my Newly Discovered Remedies, upon receipt of Expressand Postoffice address. Alvays sincercly your T, A. SLOCUXE, M.C.y 183 Beari 8t., New York. ‘When writing the Doctor, plesze mention this paper “I don’t know just when I lost my right senses, or when they came back, but when they did come back it seemed queer that I was there still. I thought I had been thrown somehere else, for I could feel fire burning me. It was my clothes. They were smoking and al- most blazing. I was bruised all over, and could not hear very well. My voice sounded as though somebody else were talking. That's all I can tell you NEW TO-DAY: HE SENDS IT FREE. A Never Failing Remedy That Makes a Man Young Again. TRUE MANLINESS QUICKLY REPLACES THE 'WORN OUT NERVES AND VIGOR. ‘When a man’s strength and vigor is slowly wasting away from nervous weakness, the mental forebodings are ten times worse than the most severe $750; Nubian lions, 6 years ol r | pain. There is no let up to the mental pair, $1500; Nublan lions, 2% d'ye};;g suffering day or night. F = years the | old, per pair, $1000, and 1% years oldq, wrlter(rol\lled and toIs)se%(hfix‘ fier:x!l-g:lgif: ; ' | sea of Nervous 2 5600); ’t;;:fale Jaguars, 18 months old, [ 3% O 50 "ana the various other cach, go2o; pumas, 3 years old, per | {roubles of Sexual Weakness, until it palr, $300; Indla leopards, male, $175 | was a question whether he had mnot better take a dose of poison and thus end all his troubles. But providential inspiration came to his aid in the shape of a combination of medicines that completely restored his general health and enlarged his weak, emaciated parts to natural size and vigor; #hd he now declares that any man, young or old, who will take the trouble to send his name and address may have Free full particulars of this wonderful home treatment which quickly restored me to my full strength and vigor of youth. Now, when I say free, I mean absolutely without cost, because I want every weakened man to get the benefit of my experience. There are thousands of men suffering the mental tortures of weakened man- hood who would be cured at once could they but get such a remedy as the one that cured me. Send for it, and learn that there are a few things on earth, although they cost nothing to get, are worth a fortune to some men, and mean a lifetime of happiness to most of us. Write to Thomas Slater, 178 Masonic Temple, Kalamazoo, Mich., and the information will be mailed in a plain, sealed envelope. L=MIDY These tiny Capsules are sup to Balsam of Copaiba, ubebsor Injectionsand URE IN 48 HOURS C [ the same diseases Wi inconvenience, Sold by all druggists, YOUNG, OLD OR MIDDLE-AGED MEN Surfering from the effects of youthful errors or premature decay should send for my book of 100 pages, which explains all _the secrets. Mailed free securely sealed in plain wrapper. | dd: 4 ADk.'LOBB, 829 N. 15th ct., Phila, Pa.