Grand Rapids Herald-Review Newspaper, April 22, 1899, Page 7

| | HIS OLD YELLOW ALMANAC. I left the farm when mother died, and vr changed my place of dwellin’ ‘© daughter Susie’s stylish house, right As in the city street, nd there was them, before I came, that Sort of scared me tellin’ How I would find the town-folks’ ways They, difficult to meet. hey said I'd have no comfort in the rust- lin’, fixed-up throng, yAna I'd have to wear stiff collars every week-diay right along. I find I talg> to city ways just like a duck wa I like the racket and the noise and’ nev- er tire of shows; there’s no end ™m And of comfort in the yuhing is right at hand, and y freely flows; And hired help is all about, ust listenin’ for my cz But I miss the yellow almanac from off my kitchen Wall. The house is full of calendars from attie ‘ om, LO, the cellar; They're painted in all colors, and are fancy-like to s ar I’m not a mod- ler, And the yellow-covered almanac is good enough for mi I'm used to it, I've seen it ’round from boyhood to old age. And I rather like the jokes at the bottom of each page. I like the way the “S’’ stood out to show the week's beginnin’, (in these new-fangled calendars the days seem sort of mixed), an upon the cover ,though he nin’, all exposed, still re fixed: day, found readin’ recently; there wa'n't reat calendars in every s atyle ke em in cold disdain, an an- Ww em in pity have my almanac than all tly pile. 1 e to city life, I'm lone- ulmanac upon my r Wilcox, in the Century. misfortunes and hap- are never either so happy as we say we W Xaggerate rhe railroad expert believes that the revenue tons hauled per best indications of a rail- to handle traffic at the lowest cost of transportation. The Re- ceivers of the Baltimore & Ohio Rail Road have been spending millions on improvements, and have not completed the work. But the revenue haul per mile in 1897-98 was increased to 314 tons, and a special report for the three months ending December 31st, 1898, shows ar rage of -9 tons, quite an appreciable advance It is confidently expected that still further improvement will be shown be- fore long. number mile is road’s lity hour in the history of any young man is when he sits down to study how to get mon without honestly “earning it—Horace Greeley. The darkest PLEASED WITH ALBERTA. An Excellent Report from Wisconsin and Minnesota Delegates. The opinion of five delegates from Minnesota and Wisconsin, published by the Edmonton Bulletin over their mames is very complimentary to Northern Alberta. The report says: “We must say with all sincerity that driving all over the country for six days, we have not found one settler Who was not more than pleased with the country and its productions, and will not irn to the land he left. We have seen people here from all parts of the states and all doing well. We met a Dakota farmer by the name of McLean, who has informed us that he has raised more’ grain here in three years than he did in thirteen where he came from, on half as much ground. We have seen a number of others, both men and women, and all speak in the same strain about Alberta. They all look well and contented; even the chil- dren are happy. In our drive over the country, in passing the countless school houses we could only see hap- piness in the faces of the little ones. We noticed them al] well dressed equal if not better than the same class of children in the state of Minnesota. The wheat that is raised here is just beautiful, the kernel full and plump and m well be termed golden grain, yielding 30 to 55 bushels to the acre. This statement is not from one farmer but from hundreds who tell the same tale. Oats yield from 70 to 100 bushels to the acre, barley from 40 to 60 bush- els and potatoes from 300 to 400 bush- els to the acre. We have taken par- ticular notice of the climate in regard to the difference between this coun- try and our own. When we left Ada, Minnesota, we were in the midst of a real Dakota blizzard. When we ar- rived at Edmonton we found the peo- ple on the streets still wearing sum- mer clothing, no mittens on their hands and far less use for them. The country is simply more than we ever @reamed of. The printed matter sent out by the government does not half tell of the grand country in Alberta, open for millions of people to make beautiful homes for themselves. Too much can not be said in praise. It is all and more than the greatest eulogist ever thought of giving to the public. We saw cattle and horses in herds grazing on the prairie like in summer time all sleek and fat. We were inf. ned by several farmers that most of 2 stock run out all winter. We also found the market extra good here for beef and pork. Hogs fetch 4% cents live weight. A three-ye2r- old steer will bring from $40 to $45 right fram the prairie. Coal and wood are he 4 in abundance. Coal is sold in the f»wn of Edmonton for $2 per ton and farmers can secure coal at the mines themseives for 75 cents per load. Before closing we say to you one and all, come to Alberta, where there are homes for millions and a promise for something to lay by for an old age. We are well satisfied with this country and as evidence have each pought a half section of C. P. R. land in township 35, range 21 west of the 4th initial meridian, and will return next spring to reside. Hoping this may be of some-benefit to the over- purdened farmers of the United Bea by Floyd Dean, son of E. S. yean of Deanville, Mich.,, who is now in Alberta, and has taken vp 160 acres there. SUICIDES WITH ORIGINALITY. Unique Methods Employed by Them in Quitting the World. The suicide of Count Karolyi is only one of many hundreds of cases of self- destruction in which it has been found impossible to assign sufficient cause for committing the act, The probabil- ity is that in 99 cases out of every 100 there never is sufficient cause, and that the life is taken in some fit of desperation or temporary insanity, as the coroner's jury prefers to call it. Another curious fact about recent sul- cides is that novelty in the methods of severing the link with life appears to have weighed considerably with the unhappy victims of disordered minds. Perhaps the most remarkable case on record is that of a man who, although in a position of great comfort and ease, one day resolved to end his ife, and his methods were so complicated that it took him nearly seven weeks to prepare for the end. With his own hands he built himself a wooden scaf- fold, consisting of four corner sup- ports and an upper staging. This he painted black, except the floor of the staging, which was blood red. Hav- ing accomplished this work, he dug a hole under the center of the stag- ing, buried’ a highly explosive mine three feet underground, so that it rested nine feet under the staging, to which it was connected by wires for firing by electricity. He then wrote to the authorities explaining his arrange- ments and that in a certain time por- tions of his body would be scattered broadcast about the field in which his scaffold was erected. Going back to the field, he placed himself on the mattress on the staging and touched the button which fired the mine. In the quantity of dramatic effect the sui- cide of a once famous _ steeplejack stands without parallel. The man had attempted to take his life by throw- ing himself into a river, for which of- fense he was charged at police court, and dismissed with a very severe cau- tion. A few weeks afterward he wrote to a friend living in the neighborhood, stating he had resolved to make a fur- ther attempt upon his life, and that he intended doing so in a manner which would obviate any possibility of his design being frustrated. Within a few hours of the dispatch of that let- ter the body of the steeplejack was seen hanging from the summit of the highest steeple in his town—a steeple he had himself repaired only a_ few months previously, Women do not ap- pear to often seek original methods of suicide, but a young woman, who had been jilted by her lover a short time ago, decided upon taking her. life in such a way that the country would ring with her name, as she thought, As a matter of fact, her terrible act was announced in five lines by some papers and not at all by others. The wretched woman left her home at the dead of night with a long coil of rope. One end of the rope she fastened to a buttress of a bridge which ran over a river and the other end she tied round her ankles. She then let herself down until her feet touched the water and the rope was taut, when she let go her hold and plunged into the river, her feet being held up by the rope, in which position she was discovered early the next morning.—London Mail CUTTA-PERCHA SCARCE. Difficult to Get Enough for a Pacific Cable. In connection with the Pacific cable a very interesting question arises, says the Engineering Magazine. From where is the gutta-percha for this gi- gantic cable to come? Every whisper of the construction of a transpacific line sends the gutta-percha market -at Singapore up by leaps and bounds. The ruling price of the gum is the highest that has ever obtained., It is stated, on what authority it is hard to say, that the visible supply of gutta-percha is insufficient for the task, and that if this cable is laid it will be the last—the last with a gutta-percha insulation at least. While this pessimism on the part of the gutta-percha producers savors somewhat of a desire to stiffen the market, there is yet a sufficiently rea- sonable foundation for it in the wanton destruction of the gutta-percha forests, It will be interesting to see the out- come of the situation. If the United States acquires an island in the Caro- lines the building of the cable line seems possible, though expensive. If they do not find ‘a landing place the operation of the cable seems to require a prohibitively costly plant. And meanwhile there is the question of the disappearing gutta-percha tree. The Ideal Female Arm. “T find great difficulty in getting a model with good arms,” said a well- known sculptor recently. “It is as- tonishing how few women there are with arms that conform to the stand- ard. A perfect arm, measured from the wrist joint to the armpit, should be twice the length of the head. The upper part of the-arm should be large, full and well rounded. ‘There should be a dimple at the elbow. The fore- arm must not be tuo flat, not nearly so flat as a man’s, for instance. “From a well-molded shoulder the whole arm should taper in Jovg. graceful curves to a well-rounded wri: Mer Matden Alm. Hoax—So young Goldrox bas taken a wife?) What was her maiden name? Joax--Her maiden pame seems to have been to marry Goldrox, aud she proved an unusually good shot for a woman.—Philadelpbia Record, Old Charches in London. . Of the thirty-five churches built by Sir Christopher Wren in London nearly one-half have disappeared, ‘ x | rf & Common Experience. “Wiggs, do you believe that gold ever grows?’ “Of course. When I have it, it con- stantly grows less.”—Chicago Record. Swallowed His False Teeth. A man recently swallowed his false teeth and it drove him mad. Stomachs will stand a great deal, but not every- thing. If yours is weak, try Hestet- ter’s Stomach Bitters. It cures stom- ach troubles, as well as malaria and fever and ague. It is stongly recom- mended at this season of the year. All druggists keep it. ‘ Why It’s All Right. “They say our ambassador's official swallow-tail coat doesn’t cut much of a dash in Européan courts beside the gorgeous robes of other foreign ambas- sadors.” “Yes; but there is an American in- side of it.”—Chicago Record. Mr. Editor:—For the good of suffer- ing humanity, and particularly those suffering from that most dreadful dis- ease, rheumatism, we desire to inform your readers that the only specific in the world today for this disease is our “Five Drops” remedy. “Five Drops” is the name, and “Five Drops” is the dose. It is not only acknowledged a specific by the many thousands who have been cured by its use, but it is now acknowledged to be such by the medical profession, many of whom use this remedy in their daily practice, and they state to us that it is the only thing with which they can cure the rheumatism. This remedy not only positively cures this disease, but it never has failed and it never can fail to cure any and all of the following diseases: Sciatica, Lumbago, Neural- gia, Catarrh, Creeping Numbness, Nervousness, Asthma, Heart Weak- hess, Toothache, Earache, La Grippe, and diseases of the liver and kidneys. “Five Drops” is not a patent medicine, but was perfected only after vast re- search in scientific fields, and at great expense. It never can be fully appre- ciated until it is used. Many of its cures border on the miraculous. Words are almost inadequate to express the great benefit which suffering human- ity is daily deriving from the use of this most wonderful remedy. Its merits and medicinal properties are as far above the other remedies offered for sale as the mountain is above the valley! It is worth its weight in gold to anyone suffering from any of the diseases for which it is recommended. The price is low and within the reach of all, $1 per bottle for full size (300 doses), prepaid by mail or express, or six bottles for $5. Anyone desiring to test its efficacy without ordering a full size bottle, can have a 25 cent sample bottle sent by mail until May 10, by sending 10 cents to the Swanson Rheu- matic Cure Company, 167 Dearborn street, Chicago, Ill. Time Wasted. “My wife never buys a hat, a gown, or even a pair of gloves without first consulting me.” \ “Is that so? wife is a wonder. te save money.” could, probably, if she didn’t al- Ways go out and get what she wanted just the same es if I had agreed to it.” Well, old man, your You ought to be able PATENT! List of Patents Issued Last Weeek to Northwestern Inventors. Linn Compton, Staples, Minn., speed- indicator; Charles S. Gilman, - Minne. apolis, Minn., card-index; Nathan Hos- kins, Minneapolis, Minn., transom ad- juster and lock McDaniel, Minneapolis, Minn., gr Frank P. Morneau, Princeton, Minn., circular lamp-wick trimmer; Arthur O’Brien, Helena, Mont., spring seat fc ‘ater closets; Frank R. Engberg, - Kindred, N. D., trace-carrier (design;) Cunning: ham N. McLaughlin, Winona, Minn., certain named mills and machines (trademark.) + Merwin, Lothrop & Johnson, Patent At- torneys, 910 Pioneer Press Bldg., St. Paul. It is impossible that an ill-natured man can have any public spirit; for how should he love tem thousand men when he has never loved one?—Pope. - Catarrh Cannot Be Cured with LOCAL APPLICATIONS, as they cannot reach the seat of the disease. Catarrh is a blood or constitutional disease, and in order to cure it youmust take internalremedies. Hall's Catarrh Cure is taken internally, and acts directly on the blood and mucous surfaces. Hall's Catarrh Cure is not a quack medicine. It was prescribed by one of the best physicians in this country for years, and is a regular pre- scription. It is composed of the best tonics known, combined with the best blood purifiers, acting directly on the mucous surfaces. The perfect combination of the two ingredients is ‘what produces such wonderful results in curing Catarrh. Send for testimonials, free. F. J. CHENEY & CO., Props., Toledo, O. Sold by druggists, price 7c. Bails Pamily Pilis are the best. Women, as a rule, have very poor memories, but they never forget the people who say nice things about their clothes. Spring Cleaning Made Easy. The first of May is sufficiently early to begin spring cleaning, but the work may be very much lightened by getting every- thing in readiness beforehand, as well as providing the best articles for cleaning purposes. For washing windows, wood- work and floors nothing equals Ivory Soap. Soft water is always easier to work with than hard. For banishing in- sects from presses and beds use alum and borax, and for purifying inside and out- side lime is excellent, ELIZA R. PARKER. Fine manners are a stronger bond than a_beautiful face. The former | binds; the latter only attracts.—Lam- artine. For the Whole Family. A safe, sure, pure, perfect medicine for all the family. Cascarets Candy Cathartic; bring health, peomete neele in the household. Drug- » 10c, Some people wait until they are re- quested to do things, and some wait until they are requested not to. SG, ELIGHTFULSSS . IQUIDJAX EN TOGET.ITS:B y aA R 3 a ER Pal SS Sc G \ FOR SALE BY ALL DRUGGISTS > PRICE'SO ¢ PER. BOTTLE. {NEW YORK, N.Y. U:S.A. LONDON ENG. N EXCELLENT GONBINATION "THE pleasant method and beneficial effects of the well-known remedy, Syrup oF Fics, manufactured “BUY THE GENUINE ¢ CATIFORNIA FIG SYRUP Oss =: S LOUISVILLE, HY. a Sj by the California Fig Syrup Company, illustrate the value of obtaining the liquid laxative principles of plants known to be medicinally laxative and presenting them in the form most refreshing to the taste and acceptable to the system. It is the one perfect strengthening laxative, CLEANSING THE SYSTEM EFFECTUALLY, DISPELLING COLDS AND HEADACHES, PREVENTING FEVERS, OVERCOMING HABITUAL CONSTIPATION PERMANENTLY. Its perfect freedom from every objectionable quality and substance, and its acting on the kidneys, liver and bowels, gently yet promptly, without weakening or irritating them, make it the ideal laxative. In the process of manufacturing figs are used, as they are pleasant to the taste, but THE MEDICINAL QUALITIES ARE OBTAINED FROM SENNA AND OTHER AROMATIC PLANTS, by a method known to the California Fig Syrup Company only. In order to get its beneficial effects, and to avoid imitations, please remember the full name of the Company printed on the front of every package. Consumers of the choicest products of modern commerce purchase at about the same price that others. “OUigvines For Sale by All Druggists , pay for cheap and worthless imitations. knowledge of the Company and its product. FRANC, pn CAL. So To come into universal demand and to be everywhere considered the best of its class, an article must be capable of satisfying the wants and tastes of the best informed purchasers. The California Fig Syrup Company having met with the highest success in the manufacture and sale of its excellent liquid laxative remedy, Syrup oF Fics, it has become important to all to have a The California Fig Syrup Company was organized more than fifteen years ago, for the special purpose of manufacturing and selling a laxative remedy which would be more pleasant to the taste and more beneficial in effect than any other known. The great value of the remedy, as a medicinal agent and of the Company’s efforts, is attested by the sale of millions of bottles annually, and by the high approval of most eminent physicians. Syrup or Fics is manufactured by the California Fig Syrup Company only, the knowledge of that fact will assist in avoiding the worthless imitations manufactured by other parties. (ALIFSRNIA FIG SYRUP © As the true and genuine remedy named New york. _ Price 50¢ Per Bottle. A Marked Difference. “They say the Prince strongly resembles Henry VIII.” “Well, he may; but he don’t seem to have the knack of: getting queens out of the way that Henry had.”—Brook- lyn Life. Do Your Feet Ache and Burn? Shake into your shoes, Allen’s Foot- Ease, a powder for the feet. It makes tight or New Shoes feel Easy. Cures Corns, Bunions, Swollen, Hot and Sweating Feet. At all Druggists and Shoe Stores, 25c. Sample sent FREE. Address Allen S. Olmsted, LeRoy, N. ¥- The man who keeps an eye on the line separating obstinancy from inde- pendence will save himself a lot of trouble. Salzer’s Seed Corn. Does your seed corn test, Bro. Farmer? Salzer’s does—it’s northern grown, early and good for 80 to 150 bu. per acre! Send this notice and 16c for 8 corn samples and low prices to John A. Salzer Co., La Crosse, Wis. [w. n.J Of every thousand sailors, eighty- four have rheumatism every year. Mrs. Winstow’s soothing Syrup. For children teething, sottene the gums. reduces tn- fiammation, allays pain, cures wind colic. 25c abottle. Truth is might, but, fortunately, a lot of it can be suppressed. When a man fails he tries to make a virtue of necessity. Have used DR. SETH ARNOLD'S COUGH KILLER in my family for 28 years. Mrs. A. Suchaneck, Minneapolis, Minn, 25c. a bottle. The poker-playing physician is sure of an occasional call. Piso’s Cure for Consumption has beena family medicine with us since 1865.—J. R, Madison, 2409 42d Ave., Chicago, Ill, A progressive St. Louis woman uses the telephone in making social calls, { of Wales | WHEAT WHEAT WHEAT “Nothing but wheat; what you might call a sea of wheat,” is what was said by a lecturer speaking of Western Can- ada. For particulars as to routes, rail- way fares, etc., apply to Superintendent of Immigration, Department Interior, Ot- tawa, Canada, or to Ben Davies, 154 East Third St., St. Paul, or T. O. Currie, Stev- ens Point, Wis. CANDY CATHARTIC '15¢. inch rinted in four colors and mounted on a roller, will be sent to in coin, postal or express money order. well ion postage stamps, GEO. P. LYMAN, Gen- any address on receipt of 15 cents We cannot eral Passenger Agent C., B. & N. R. R.,St. Pauly Minn, CURE YOURSELF? Use Big @ for unnatural discharges, inflammations, irritations’ or ulcerations . of mucous mem! fa[Prevents contagion, °bainiess, and not astrin: {THEEVANS CHEMICALCO, gent or poisonous. by express. prepaid, $1.0. or 3 bottles, $2.75. ircular sent on request —No. 16.— 1839) FARM LANDS FOR SALE DO YOU WANT A HOME? ACRES OF GOOD !N WASHBURN AND BARRON COUNTIES, FARMING LANDS Long time and easy payments to actual settlers. Come and see us or address, W. R. BOURNE, Mgr., SHELL LAKE LUMBER CO., SHELL LAKE, WIS. msconais $3, 00 to $6.00 Ste “THERE IS SCIENCE IN NEATNESS.” BE WISE AND USE _SAPOLIO ALABASTINE — Alabastine, the only durable wall coat- ing, takes epee of scaling kalsomines, wall paper and paint for walls. It can fased on plaster, brick, wood or canvas. Alabastine can be used over paint or Paper; Alabastine. ages, properly labeled; take no substitute. — paint or paper can be used over Buy only in five pound pack- Every church and schoolhouse should be coated only with Alabastine. bpp enu- ine Alabastine does not rub and scale off. of tons used yearly for this work. Alabastine packages have full direc- tions. Anyone can brush it on. Ask 3 dealer for tint card. “Alabastine Era” free. Alasbastine Co., Grand Rapids,Mich. !