Evening Star Newspaper, September 13, 1928, Page 39

OH: SHOW HIM RIGHT || OH Boy!' WILL I BE GLAD IN PERKINS. HE's To GET RID-OF THAT BuncH ANSWERING THE OF MARBLE . I DONT KNOW FOR SALE D T PuT WHAT THIS GOY COULD WART \N THE Dnm?z‘ WITH A 42 ToN STATUE, BUT) AH' GooD HORNING SIR- 1AM HERE ™ SEE YU IN REGHRD TO THAT YES \SNT (TAPP? T BREAKS MY HEART T SELL IT — 1TS A REAL WORK OF ART, BUT 1 MUST SACRIFICE 1T! OH! 3 DONT WiISH T® Boy (T SIRT 1 An HERE To COLLECT 3 3, 50C FOR THE RAIL ROAD POR FREIGHTING T FROM OPELIKA, ALABAMA ! BY THORNTON STATUE W. BURGESS THAT BEDTIME STORIES WY oy acxeret. ! “ * Trash to you, to me s treasure. If possession gives me pleasure. —Trader the Wood Rat. As you all know, Trader the Wood Rat is a collector. If he couldn't be col- lecting things he never would be happy. It doesn’t make a great deal of differ- ence. to “Trader what he collects so long as he ‘collects something. Like Blacky the Orow. he likes shiny things. * He had decided to move back to the e Hlaov ‘' HE GLOATED OVER THESE 'TREASURES. sugar-house where Whitefoot the Wood Mouse and little Mrs. Whitefoot were ljving. And when Trader makes up his mind to do a thing he does it. 8o he wasted no time. Trader chose a drek corner underneath one end of the bunk ia the sugar-house. To this he began bringing sticks. He dragged them in through a hole in the ground where the woodpile had been. This hole led out of doors. Trader likes a very big nest. It seemed to Whitefoot and Mrs. Whitefoot that Trader was bringing in ali the dead sticks in the Green Forest. He was a Kard worker was Trader. It is his na- ture to work hard. There is nothing lazy about, him. ‘He believes that if people want things they must work for them. When Trader had his new home ar- ranged to suit him he was no less bus: than before. He began bringing in his | treasures. Whitefoot and Mrs. White- ! foot could simply sit and stare. To | begin with he brought. one at a time, | a good-sized pile of white pebbles. “What under the sun does he want of those things?" whispered Mrs. White- | foot. “It's too much for me” declared | Whitefoot, examining the pile, while | Trader was gone for another stone. “Hc | can't eat ‘em. I don't know what he's got them for.” A little later Whitefoot discovered | that Trader had a lot of new treasures | These consisted of bits of shell from the | Laughing Brook and of small bones | which had been whitened by exposure | to the weather. There was a lot of what you and I would call “trash.” He gloated over these treasures. He ex- pected Whitefoot the Wood Mouse and | Mrs. Whitefoot to gloat over them also. But Mi. and Mrs. Whitefoot were not | even interested. | “If it were food I would understand it.” said Mrs. Whifefoot, “but what he | wastes his time collecting all that use- | less stuff for I don't see. It's too much | for me.” . ! Meanwhile, Trader was storing his | treasures away in different places. The | pebbles he put in one place, the bits of | bone in another, the pieces of shell in a | third place and so on. Each was kept separate. “Don’t you store any food?” inquired | Whitefoot. | “Certainly, Cousin, certainly,” replied Trader, “but it fsn’t time yet. You wait ‘til the nuts get ripe. I believe in hav- | ing plenty to eat in the Winter and no { member of the squirrel family works | harder than I do at the proper season: | Now I must hurry away. When I was {out the last time I saw something white |and shiny in the moonlight. I couldn't | stop to pick it up then, but I'm going | back after it now.” | Off ran Trader. It wasn't long before | he was back again. He had the handle | of an old crockery cup. It was one that | had been broken in the sugar camp and thrown out. “Just look at that!” cried Trader, ad- | miringly. “Isn’t that the nicest thing? lsn how it shines! Don't you wish you | had it?" | “No,” replied Whitefoot. (Copyright. 1928.) LITTLE BENNY BY LEE PAPE. Me and pop and ma was up in the Hving room and .ma sed to pop, I was in to see Madam Seero agen today, Willyum. Meening the fortune teller, and pop sed. For Peet sake wen will you stop being taken in by that bunk? Why Willyum..dont you bleeve -theres such a thing as one person having hid- den oceult powers and being able to look into another persons life and read their future? ma sed. I bi¢eve theres such-a thing as one Abe Martin Says: gogely eyed woman bunking a lot of other "goggly eyed wimmin and taking their husbands hard erned money away from them for telling them a lot of childish drivel, pop sed. Yee gods I think IIl invest in a turban and a bowl of goldfish and call myself Pottso the Mystick, step rite in, ladies, and make myself a millionaire, he sed. Well if you really bleeve she’s a fake I must admit Im rather relieved, be- cause Il tell you wat she told me, ma sed. She told me I am contemplating making a considerable outlay of money for clothes in the near future, and she told me I would be doing wrong, because she said by persqhality .was plain and unassumying EM _she said I ‘would be misreprésenting it with a lot of fash- lonable clothes ang she said everybody should express thelr own personality to get the best out of themsalves, in fact to use her own comparison she said I was a sparrow making up my mind to l?‘ol like a pemd:ockdl;:d that I should chamge my mind and kech my own per- om&% and. at- the samé. time save all that fieedless money. And its perfeckly true about the new clothes I was going to order, and naturelly I was a little disappointed because their really quite bewtiful, so if you think she's a fake and just making that all up Ill order the clothes after all, ma sed. In fact Im quite relieved, she sed. Well wait a minnit, every rule has its exception, wat kind of a looking woman is this Madam Seero? pop sed. Has she got a kind ef an intense look around the eyes? he said, and mad sed, Never mind, Im quite convinced your rite and !r;a just going to disregard everthing she sed. Yee gods, hit me with a heavy blunt instrument, somebody, pop sed. And he got in back of the sporting page agen looking sorry he had ever came out. Lessons in English BY’W. L. GORDON. Words often misused: Do not say “Not one of ‘the children wiil study his or her lesson.” Omit “or her.” “His" is sufficient.’ Often misprgnounced: Quorum; “o” &8 in “no,” not as in “or.” Often misspelled: Gate.(a passage), gait (manner of walking). Synonyms: Edge, margin, rim, brink, brim, border, boundary. Word study: “Use a word three times and it is yours.” Let us increase our voohbulary by mastefing one word each day. Today's word. Diametrically; as Th' age limit fer pustmasterships has been raised three years, an’ now a Con- gressman kin promise a feller a pust- office till he's 68. ‘Who remembers when a girl-had t' flee from a burnin’ hotel or join a bur- lesque show t’ exploit her charms? (Coyrignt. 1928, ° Easy Money Boys | " Sl i et Aot It's sad to see a young man tired of everything his eyes behold, with nothing fit to be admired, while all his blessings leave him cold. It is the fate of many lads who have grown up in gilded ease, who touch their fathers for the scads, who seem to think coin grows on trees. ‘They motor all around the town or push their airplanes to and fro: they never had to buckle down to gain the luxuries they know. They never had to ply a hoe throughout a long, hot Sum- mer day or take a three-tined fork and throw upon & wagon loads of hay. They never had to strive and strain behind a sawbuck and a saw, or carry brick or harvest grain or feed a thresher's hun- gry maw. They never had to do with- out the traps for which they yearned and pined, “for father is a good old scout,” so they avoid the beastly grind. They never had to earn a piunk by digging holes or driving brads, and so the luxuries seem junk for which they blow the unearned scads. And so be- fore they're fairly grown they're sad and jaded as can be; theyre sick of everything they own and tired of every- thing they see. The man who in his younger years gets down to tacks while Croesus plays, who labors like a brace of steers, finds zest in life throughout his days. And every luxury he buys re- calls the time when he was broke and couldn’t - purchase costly pies or buy himself a 5-cent smoke. He buys him- self a lloveglpe hat and thinks about the bygone hour when such a gorgeous lid as that seemed far beyond his earn- ing power. And so, contrasting bygone times with present pomp and circum- stance, he qu mucH comfort from his dimes, and life's & merry song and rémotely as possible. “Our opinions were diametrically opposed.” BRIDGE. TEITTIMG WITH NINE SEADE S AnD FIVE HOMGR S AND Your PARTMER E1DS OUT OF TURM’ o e— weLe, You Vnow THE RULE = Voue PARTHER dance. MASON. (Copyrizht. 1928.) .—By WEBSTER. L 810’ onE This world too cold for man. - And so I shovld spprecivte This nice warm S.L.HUNTLEY A Striking Situation. Is the First Law of Nature. e oy KENKLING He Almost Got Rid of Her. B GENE ByRNES The Silent Voice. ALBERTINE RANDALL Thinks He'll Visit a Spell! By | Pop MOMAND More Expense. SHOM HIM RIGHT HE:CAN HAVE \T AT HIS OWN S HEY, PA PIFS UE, N 4o cLassER- BRAINED OLD PIVTE, THAR'S A BIG THUNDER/ L= STORM ComIN': LP / M IN SOFT AT LAST, T'™M PEN NAME OF SAM SASH AND IT'S A CINCHs ALL T DO IS CLIP THE BEST STUFF OF RING LARDNER, IRV COBB, GEORGE ADE AND MORTIMER MUGG AND MAKE UP MY COLUMN ¢ NOBODY KNOWS WHO 'SAM SASHIS. Jisig NYUHRE ACTIN' AS X-C'TED AS A OLD« MAID AT A STAG ! ONNER D HET,. . A LIGHTNIN'EAINT CLOSE ENOLGH rro'uurzy Y THAT COLUMNIST SAM SASH HAS MORE NERVE THAN A CAKE EATER. EVERY DAY HE SWIRES SOME OF MY STUFF AND USES AT AS HIS OWN. I'M GONNA T'VEé BEEN TRYING TO FIND oUT FOR A WEEK WHQ THIS GUY SAM SASH (S BUT AOBODY SEEMS To IKNOW. THERE'S JEFF. MAYBE HE IKNOWS THe SAP. REMARKABLE STATUE = TM OPEN TO ANY SiR- ™D FOR 1T7? REASONADBLE OFFER WHAT DO You DIDNT THOSE GUYS ouUT N ofell PAY TH' PREIGHT! =ty o MY BEST STUFFE EVERY DAY AND Z'M TIRED OF 1Ts DO YOU HAPPEN TD KNOW HIM? I WANT TO BEAT HiMm UP| CAN Y'BEAT \T 7 1 HAD MYSELF TRA! FROM THE WASHINGTON BALL CLUB To DETROIT JUST T'GET RID OF MY AUNT MINNIE, AND HERE SHE 1S ) ON THE TRAIN! Now I MUST r APOLOGIZE FOR N ,, SNEAKING AWAY, FROM HER ! =l & WE'VE GOT A BABY AT OUR HOUSE ,DIcK 1 | /1)) IDED L/ SORRY I DION'T ./, [ HAVE TIME T'SAY /7 || cooD BYE = BUT HAD T'RUSH To DETROIT ! WHY DID You LEAVE o WASHING TN ¢ PLACE FoR A IN_FACT TOURIST DETRAT 15 MY NEXT STop ! You'w $ET HEART FAILURE ): DODGING THE FLNVERS THeRe ! DETROIT |5 NO * STATION = 600D-BYE TAAT HAPPENS To BE MY GARMENT Y0U JUST RUINED AND THE HILARITY 4 You AND YOuR FRIENDS ARE ENJOYING WiLL COST You $ |9_@ THE SQUIRRELS COME TO HIM! IS HE A NEW ONE ? WELL, § DUNNO ! HE_DON'T LOOK NASNTA TooTh IN HIS HEAD t HIT SAYS HERE A FELLER RE A TEL DOLLAR BILL HE FOUND To AGA NAN SHE MARRIED, AN soME FOLKS STILL AUOW HONES Y/ 1S TH BEST / WORD OUT OF Yoy: TI'm MORTIMER MUGG THe HUMORIST AND YoU'RE POISON TO ME, THASS ALk MY VAUSE BY MISTAKE ! HOME —— GOLF IS 100 EXPENSNE. UP RERE . rrloQHNARb 4o EXPLAIN! BUT 15 KINDA LIKE A WALNLT MAKES WHEN T WANYS TO 8E | GUESS S0 — RIS THINGS OFF ! &