Evening Star Newspaper, November 5, 1898, Page 14

4 THEA EVENENG STAR, SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 5, 1898-24 PAGES. who went down ta Cuba with relt and his Rough Riders.” said | 2g Robb Church of this city, who i himself as a surgeon in that untqu zation, “will never ire of telling stories on the brave colored brothers te up the immortal 1th Cavairy.” s he used to be known | s at Princeton and played foot nwn resting up and getting back | <h he lost around Santiago. » told without number to | ma lack of fear those col- ored troor layed, as well as their nerve wh led, but two incidents that came vider my own observation may be worth repesting. | rs of the 10th who were | wn the charge on San Juan Fliil | min: ‘wn together, arm in arm. n hit by Mauser bullet at his left eye wi fairly cn his cheek, while t in the jaw and a quarter section of his . He of um lamp was whistling as if nothing »ened, but the other couldn't wh both stopped, and, m, they began jaugh- t heartily. Johnsen,’ said the man with the nded jaw, as well as he could, for his none of the best, “yo" sut- yo" could only see yo'self ye a-hangin’ out on yo’ z make yo" look foolish.’ } talkin’ "bout, man,’ retorted Yo" ain't got no brag comin’, fo" | with as littie mouth as you's got left ain't no Apollinaris Beveldere.* w, how about that for cool nerve? again, it W: i of July, if r cerrectly. We had been both- considerably by the shrapnel shells, d I. for one, must admit that I do not ap- preciate the beauties of shrapnel. I was Standing out in front of the hospital tent, when I overteard a conversation between two color »1 t:copers who were on their way stream for water. n't care for them Mauser bulle Said one of them, for when you hear one of them yo! knows it's done past and can't hit vo".but I sho'ly would give my interest in h—I ef I could find out whar is that cannon that shoots them camp kittles full of roi ‘They’s a diffunt proposition altogether. a There many stories told about the manner in which secretaries in the different departments are hampered by what is known as regulatiors, law and general red tape. An instance of this occurred the other day in the Navy Department. A case had been presented to Secretary Long concerning an enlisted man, who went into avy as a sailor at the veginning of the war. but as there did not seem to be a ar prospect of any further flght- ing the man wanted to return to his fam- and his old oceupaticn. To the Secre- are t was a meritorious case, and ie de- to issue a Wscharge for the man. He called in an officer from th: navigation bureau made known his : Mr. Secretary, phot be dis The Secretar: navigation bur of the have this man discharged from t ‘he announced. The chief "nit his br and replied: “Mr. Secre Jaw and regulations are very arged from the The Secretar: nd requested the advocate general. department Is t may be di asked the answered the lawyer. * ged for cause.” way i from t judge man cannot be except his discharge the offi h a twinkle in his man's di = tation, terday morning. his discharge. says a dise’ and The 3 for a moment and then the veason Secreta eye: “Make out | added, after a | it rai es: | man ha: becau! The eee * =i pearance of china from wed- ding present displays has been a marked | feature the last year.” said a frequently in- vited guest the other day. “There does not seem to be any good reasor on the score of artistic beauty, which is or ought to be the first ecns' ion in selecting a souvenir for the , for ¢ is get- ting prettier and cheaper all the time. but turned to gold and fair to remain there for recent gorgeous ful things to in a assort- men affec tion hich the prettiest little girl in Wast n is held, th were silver » twos and thre punch Is, side dishes and dyzens 1 plendid pieces of table . of new, antique and every oth manufacture, but there was on piece new to me of si Tt er which was absolutely person who sent it achiev: © fame in consequence. tive silver blower, shaped like id its use was to blow out rmits this feat without the ay joned before od enough, but the spluttering flame » the desired point. for the ere but t the guests were gay and frolicsome its use could start some fun. and in the hands of an ingenious small boy or girl, it could zlse convey with the accuracy | of a Mau er bullet the tiniest of spit balls.” | ee cee “Fashions in tombstones,’ said a work- man the other day at Oak Hill cemetery “change just like they do in everything else. A few years ago tall shafts were the form which most persons seemed to like best, but now many of the new monuments | of eartridges? here are not over six feet high, and about half as thick as they are wide. The top is arched and there fs good space for hand- some ornamentation.” A great many visitors have been at Oak Hill lately, who did not come because they had relatives or friends buried there, but because the cemetery has the monument to John Howard Payne, the author of “Home, The Blaine family lot is also a spot to which most of the pilgrims wind their way. Additional interest is just now attracted to the grave of James G. Blaine, because part of the ground is not soided and awaits the erection of the head- stone which bis widow has ordered. A fine old owk tree was in the middle of this lot when Mr. Blaine selected it for his last resting place, and he said at the time it would form his monument. Much of the ground near the lot had new earth put over it @ few years ago to keep up the grade, and ft is thought that this killed the tree, since another close by has also died and now stands a lonely sentinel, covered with ivy nearly to the top. The custom of decorating graves on All Souls’ day is rapid- ly growing in this city, and has almost Yeached the proportions which the same beautiful remembrance on Memorial day obtains. In Paris, the procession of mourn- ers to Pere La Chaise and other less noted resting places of the dead is as settled an ¢¥ent tm the publie mind as the national fete day. A few years ago the day was scarcely noticed here in this way at all, sonal reminiscences of that exciting time. He was with Burnside's army, opposite Fredericksburg, in March, 1863, when that great hest of 130,000 men was encamped down in Virginia, wondering what it was going to do and where it was going to do it. The mistake, or whatever it was, of Burnside at that town in the preceding December was regarded by the authorities at Washington as requiring some activity on the part of his army, and Dr. Tindall, who was then on a few days’ detail at the headquarters of the 3d Division of the i Corps, one day received from corps headquarters, for promulgation, an order the substance of which was that the army should be prepared to move at once with eight days’ rations and eighty rounds of cartridges to be carried by each man. The order had hardly been recetved when one of the attaches of the headquarters, who had been down to the village cf Fal- mouth, just opposite Fredericksburg, came into the office tent and in a thick voice, which was not acquired in a temperance riety, Inguired: “What's In the wind about eight days’ rations and eighty rounds of cartridges?’ The doctor was thunderstruck at the inquiry, as he was ; that no one but the principal officers of the army and those in their immediate confidence were legitimately in possession ot the information. He expressed surprise at the inquiry, and was informed by his questioner that, while he was down at the river opposite Fredericksburg a few min- ttes before, one of the confederate pick +ts had shouted tauntingly over to him, jel- ! are you going to do with rations and eighty rounds to the confed- wonder of the and ended How the information go erates the nine da, time. march was begun The before the great army had fully got in mo- tion. The part which did start floundered in the rain and mire for a day or two and then returned to its camp from the ad- venture which is known in military annals as the “Mud March.” ‘After the battle of Gettysburg,” said Dr. Tindall to a Star reporter, “while the army of the Potomac was following the army of Lee in the neighborhood of Frederick, Md., a detachment of our cavalry advanne saw two men, whom they overtook, One of them proved to be a man in middle life, of more than average size, and the other his son. The elder they recognized as a man who had constantly followed the army, and in camp was known to most of th soldiers as a dealer in off-color cards and yellower Mterature. If they had had presence of mind enough te greet the cav- alrymen familiarly it is probable they would not have attracted special attention, as it would have been taken as a matter of course that they had strayed from the army and lost their way, out they foolishly tried to run away or conceal themseives, and were taken into custody. “Their confused attempts to account for their presence there led to a search of their persons, and the discovery upor. the older of a flask, in the bottom of which were plans and descriptions of our military situ- ation and resources. They were both promptly trizd by drum-head court-martial, end as promptly hanged to the nearest ap- ple tree, about a mile or so southwest of Frederick City. The whole army on its way to the Potomac was taken past their dangling bodies. Thus another illustration was added to the old adag» that ‘the wick- ed flee where no man pursueth.’ “It transpired at the court-martial, through the confession of the old mar, per- haps, that the information which the con- federate picket had shout2d across the river had been telegraphed across the river by the old man, who had a telegrapa_in- strument in a cellar of an old mill in Fal- mouth and a cable to the opposite shor2. He was as familiar at headquarters as where in the army, and had no trouble in getting his information.” Sa ADMIRER OF WOMEN. But His Standard of Excellence Rises Every Time. I was riding along th2 road leading across Hurricane Gap, in the Pine mountain range, thinking of the peculiar people who lived in these fastnesses, when I was startled by a voice up the hillside calling to me to come up and giv2 somebody a lift. AN who owned the voice, but and I re- sponded and found a man of sixty or mere caught by the foot under a failen tree and unable to get away. He wasn’t hurt, and I soon hed him on his f2et, and he insi on my stopping further down th> mountain and dinner with him. He live well-kept cabin with his daughter, after dinner we sat in the shade of x in the yard and he told me about himself. “Air you marric told_me he was i ‘No, but I hope to be some da: wered, quite sincerely. You ought to be; every maz a man that ain't ain't snow lin’ to'rds what the Lord's done thar ain't nothin’ on the fac green earth that I don’t keer wnat kind she 1s.” You're hale and hearty yet,” I said, ‘and 1 don’t see why you don’t take some uv 8 a patchin’ to a woman, | of your own advice. Don't crowd the mow 2id, Waving his hand as if warding off attack. “‘Dun't you crow. the mourners, iim figgerin’ on sever'l uhis very n:inute, and I ain't quite shore yit which one to pick. I've been married four times, and ry time my notions uv women has got » muca higher that I'll be derned ef 1 don't kinder look forrerd :o losin’ a wife jist fer the satisfaction uv gittin’ another ene.” he idea was so entirely new that I was ov-rcome by it. ———e COMPARATIVE DANGERS, Soldiers Not the Only Ones Who Are in Peril. The two girls on a Pennsylvania train from Washington to Philadelphia had in the course of the first hour become ac- quainted, and in the next they were guite as confidential as if they had known each mist» he | other for years, such is the beautiful sim- plicity of girl nature. “Oh, yes,” said the gray-eyed one, blush- ing prettily, “I have several friends with the army in Cuba. Have you?” 1 have not,” responded the biue- eyed one. “I have some acquaintances, but I shculd scarcely call them friends.” “Oh, I don’t mean that,” exclaimed the gray eyes, without knowing exactly what she did mean. “With what command is he’ inquired the blue eyes, smiling in rather a superior manner. “Oh, you tease,” twittered the gray eyes, “but, of course, you know, anyhow, and I might as well tell you. He is the nicest fellow you ever saw, and I want you should meet him some time. He is at San- tiago now, and has been down there since the troops first landed. It was simply aw- ful when he first went down there to that horrid fighting. Every day we sat waiting for the news that might tell he was shot or something dreadful had happened to him. You didn't have any one down there, and you can have no conception of the perfectly awful strain it 1s to wait for news from the front when some loved one is there,” and the soft gray eyes grew moist at the memory. ‘The blue eyes took upon themselves the look only blue eyes can take. “Oh, I don't know,” said their possessor, “I have a friend who plays foot ball.” a Betrothals in Spain. A curious custom obtains in some por- tions of Spain in regard to betrothals. A young man who leoks with favor upon a handsome senorita and wishes to gain her hand calls on the parents for three suc- cessive days at the same hour of the but last Tuesday there was a chanee to see | day. At the last call he leaves his walking how the Suet eatin has grown by the | stick, and if he is to win the desired bride numbers of the flower-decked graves in so | the cane is handed to him when he calls many of the cemeteries. Dr. Tindall, the secretary of the board cf commissioners, was in the Army of the Potomac during the war between the States, and, being at that time of an age @, again. favor, in this way understand that leas. a It pays Star. Hundreds | AN AWKWARD PREDICAMENT “One of these days the fool killer ie going to show up with a meat ax and a knotty stuffed club @nd wreak a whole lot of frightful execution upen that darge class of idiots who fancy that it’s excruciatingly funny to play all sorts of cheap jokes Upon their just-married friends,” said John C. Stillwell, a well-known citizen of St. Louis, who, with his remarkably handsome wife. was a guest at one of -the uptown hotels a few days ago. “I believe I've got a rightful kick coming on this subject, and so has my wife. We've been married for cver fifteen years, and yet for the past three weeks—ever since we set out from St. Louis, bound for New York, to bring back our two boys, who have been visiting my brother's children there—we have been the victims of a dismal mistake, al! owing to the funniness of one of these Reubens, who t>inks that matrimony is such a howl- ing farce that it ought to start off like the first act of a burlesque show. It seem’ that on the day we left St. Louis far Chi- cago and other stopping places, en route to New York, a St. Louis young fellow, with my identical name, but no kin of mine, got married. His wedding trip, oddly enough, was to precisely parallel our jour- ney to New York, with stops, that is to say, at Chicago, Detroit, Pittsburg, Phil- adelphia ard, finally, New York. Very oddly, again, this just-married Stillwei! had picked out the same hotels in these cities as stopping pl for himself and bis bride as I had for myself and my wife of fifteen years’ standing. The young man was unfortunate enough to pick out for a groomsman a turnip-headed ass, whose name f won't give just aow; but I'm going to look him up and say a few personally conducted things te him when I get back to St. Louis. The groom had confided to his groomsman the itinerary of his wed- ding trip, and that was the opportunity of the groomsman's life to be giddy and funny. He sent a telegram like this to the Chicago hotel that was to be the first stop on the bridal trip: “John C. Stillwell, well-known young man here, arrives at your house with bride tonight. Treat them right. them the best you've got.’ “When my wife and I got to the Chicago hotel that night the clerk looked at me pa- tronizingly and quizzically when I walke@ up to the desk and registered. “*Which of the bridal chambers will you have, Mr. Stillwell? he asked me. ‘We've got a suite in pe.cock blue and cream, and one in white and gold. Any preference? They're both $80 a day for two, American plan.’ “I looked at the clerk pretty hard for a minute. I thought maybe he'd been hitting up the bar a bit too freely. “Eighty a day?’ I said. ‘Is that all? Well, you can just fit me out for about one-fifth of that fer my wife and myself, and I'll lend your house the glitter of my presence. Who said anything about bridal chambers, anyhow?” “It was his turn then to size me up. He reached behind the desk and produced the etecca I didn’t know then that there wae another John C. Stillwell in St. Lonis, and I wondered a good deal what fool friend of mine was capable of putting up such a dinky job as that on me. The clerk looked at me all the time, as if he thought I was just fooling him; but when I insisted that I didn't travel in the elghty-a-day elass he regarded me, I know, as a pretty cheap sort of a just-married man—tod méan to pay the freight of a first-rate wed- ding journey whirl. That clerk was in the dining room when my wife and I got down to breakfast the next morning. Now, while my wife 1s verging on thirty-fi she doesn't look it by a good seven or eight years. and che’s a pretty handsome dre: too. She had on a new tailor-made t eling dress at breakfast, and I saw that clerk looking at me throughout breakfast with an expression on his face as much as to say, ‘Well, a man that’s just been mar- ried who won't get the swellest going for such a handsome bride, is Corean coin in my estimation.’ “T had the same identical experience when I registered at tho hotel in Detroit vs later. The clerk asked me to color combination for a bridal chamber. and when I told him to wake out of his trance he showed me a. similar tel- egram, signed by the same imbecile who sent the dispatch to the Chicago hotel. I was pretty hot over this, but I leaned over the desk and asked the clerk, confiden- ally ‘Say, on the level, do I look ke one?’ “My boy, I em compelled to ad hat you do.” he replied blandly; and be, too. regarded me with an askance gaze when I told him he could cut out the bridal cham- ber business and give me a fair-sized room, with a bath, for myself and wife. “It was the same in Pittsburg and the same in Philadelphia. I was pretty sore over the business by the time it had been worked on me in four different cities, and I sat down in Philadelphia and wrote a half dozen exceedingly hot letters tn friends of mine in St. Louis who I thought might, in moments of delirium, be capable oi sending the telegrams. I've got thos letters to square when I get back to S! I was ting for the New York ork to spring the bridal chamber gaz on me when I walked in to register, hut he dice't. When I had written my name down, and he turned the book around, he looked at me with a queer expression on his face. ‘This is about as queer a coincidence as ever I met tp with. and I've been in the hotel business a good many years.’ said he. “What's a queer coincidence?’ I asked. For reply he turned the register around so IJ could read it, and pointed to the entry made just above my own. It read: “John C. Stillwell and wife. St. Louis.’ “I'm a rather temperate man, or I should surely have thought that 1 had "em for a mir or so. Then I had a ray of light I sent my card up to the other Stillwell. The clerk told me that he had only arrived with his wife a few minutes ahead of me. The young fellow came down to the hotel rotunda shcrtly. He was rather a clever young chap. After shaking hands and te!l- ing me that he had no idea there was an- other man of his name a resident of St. Louts—he himself had only been there for a few months, he said—he asked me to join him in one. J declined, but said to him: ‘My boy, I don't want to appear as a rryer. but id you get married in St. Lovie about three weeks ago?" He promptly replied that he had. Then I up and told him my tale of woe. He just rolled and wallowed around in his chair. I couldn't get a word out of him for fully four minutes, he was so full of chuckles. Finally be said: “‘I was handed that dispatch by the clerk here when I came in to register, about half an hour ago.’ “Yes. but, confound it,’ I said, ‘I was handed four of ’em in four different towns,’ and he rolled around some more. “The telegrams were written by my fool groomsman,’ he said then. ‘I gave him a fake itinerary of my wedding journey, for I knew he would be up to some devilment if I gave him the correct route,’ and he chortled a good deal again. ‘What do you care. so long as you've got your health? Look at the fun you've had!’ and derned {f the young whelp didn’t go on guying me for ten minutes. He had taken the south- ern route for New York. After a while I saw that it was on me for the wine, and T came to taw; but my namesake had the bulk of the fun out of the thing.” ies Licenses for Boarding Houses. A plan is being discussed in London for inspecting, registering and furnishing with @ certificate all lodging houses before they are permitted to receive iodgers. ft is claimed there would be many advantages in such a system. The respectable and honest keepers of lodging houses would not object to it, and the only malcontents would be those whose apartments wou'd rot bear inspection. It would not only save lodgers great inconvenience, but fre- quently sertous illness. —_—. The First Bet. ‘The first bet on record is that referred to in the twenty-ninth book of the “Iliad,” which has been rendered into English blank verse, as follows: “Wilt thou a tripod or a cauldron stake And Aganiemmon, Atreus’ son, appoint The umpire to decide which steeds are first?” the odds this occasion was Idomeneus, the Cretan king. Plutarch also speaks of wagering, and 80 does So- phocles, and so does Caius Caligula, and so do many more celebrities who flourished in the years when the world was young. Seereessnee es “I should think that the United States would Sorin favor of the disarmament of Bui as proposed by the czar,” remark- 1. Gertatnly,” replied Gummey. “In fact, we began it. We have disarmed Spain all right.”—Detrolt Free Presa. WILLING’ TO RUN THE SHIP 1 “About four years ago the cruiser on which I was derting shipped a boiler maker while we wefe-on the Mediterranean sta- tion,” said a Wgshington chief petty officer of the mt vy, now here on leave of ubsence. Ovr former Seller maker's time expired vihtle we were at Gibraltar, and as he was rot in good Physical shape he wasn't re- enlisted, but took his diseharge and re- turned to the United States by mail steam- er. So the ship was shy a boiler maker, a very important.and necessary petty officer down below in the engineer’s department, and when the ship pulled into Naples har- bor the chief engineer went ashore to see if he couldn't dig up a boiler maker to ship at the rate. There's a clause in the en- listment regulations permitting command- ing officers to. ship necessary men on for- eign stations in short-handed emergencies. The chief engineer brought back to the ship a Greek named Charlie Maro. The man couldn’t speak any English—to speak of—but he was a good man at the boiler taking business, and he was duly shipped aboard of us for three years. He was a wild, hairy-lodking lot, Maro was, and he Sot a good deal of a laugh at the hands 0: the crew, especially the younger fellows, from the time he first came over the side The derision his queer appearance and his extraordinary attempts at English excited among the men forward often got Maro going during the first few months of his cruise, but after awhile he got to be an old story, and the men gradually let up on him. Maro thought that there wasn’t any other country on the map except Greece. He thought that the ‘Greeka man’ was the hottest Kind of a tomale when it came to scrapping by land or sea, and, after he got hold of enough English to make himself understood, he used to take some of the yeung apprentice boys up into the eyes of the ship and tell them, with many gesticu- lations and furious words, of the different kinds of tar Greeee would knock out of Turkey if the two countries ever came to ar, open rupture. “Dhe ship was around on the Pacific sta- tion when the war broke out between Greece and Turkey more than two years ago. When the news of the outbreak of the war goi to Maro, our boller maker, he like to have had heart disease and a whole lot of other sudden things from pure ex- citement. He just couldn't hold himself in, he looked so tickled. “ ‘Da Greeka man willa bim! bim! bim! da Turka man,” was Charlie Maro’s way of putting ft, and he didn’t see that the Turks ‘had a ghost of a show. All hands forward encouraged him in the belief. They all acquiesced in expressing the belief to Maro that Greece would simply eat Turkey up. Then a bo'sun's mate who knew’how to crack the most impossible kind of steers with a face as solemn and wooden as an Indian’s took Charlie in hand and told him some things. He tcld Maro that the United States was so much iA sympathy with Greece in the struggle with Turkey that the Navy Department had decided to turn over all of the ships of the American navy to Greek commanders. “““Here's a big chance for you, Maro," the bo’sun’s mate told Maro.” “You just want to work your edge. Here you are al- ready shipped on this cruiser, and it's dol- lars to doughnuts that if you ask for the command of this ship, in order to take he: over to Greece to mix it up with the Turk you'll get it, hands down. Better try it on. “That idea impressed Maro a heap. He asked the bo’sun’s mate who he'd have to apply to to get command of the cruiser, ““Why, to the commanding officer, of course,’ was his reply. “Maro was tremendously important for a day or so while he let this huge idea grow within him, apd he bullied the men detailed te work with him down below in the boiler reom a good deal. The ho’sun’s mate kept working him up to it, and finally Maro ap- Feared on deck ong morning, togged out in his very best mustering sult of bluejacket clothes (when he ought to have been in dungarees, ready to begin work cleaning out the boilers after a run), and went up to the officer of the deck and asked per- mission to seb the commanding officer at the mast. The officer of the deck was rather surprised to see the man all done up in his mustering togs when all hands were at work, but, as ke is obliged to do When an enlisted man requests permission to see the commanding officer, he sent word to the skipper, who soon emerged from his cabin and appeared at ‘the stick.’ “Well, my man? said the skipper to Maro, who stood bolt upright and saluted with a flourish. “‘Sare,’ said Maro to the skipper, ‘I hava da honor to here-a-by taka da command of- a da ship.’ “ ‘Hey? said the commanding officer, put- ting his hand at his ear and looking ‘as if he hadn't heard aright. “Da ship,’ repeated Maro. ‘For-a da navee of-a Hellas—da Greeka navee—I hava da honor to taka da command.’ “All hands among the enlisted men were up on the to’galant fo'e’sle, taking the thing in, and they broke into a roar that yeu could have heard five cable Jength distance. Maro heard it, and, suspecting that his confidence had been ‘abused, got red and flabbergasted. He suddenly bolted for the engine room hatch and made his way below, and it took three marines to drag him aft to the sick bay, where the sirgeon, at the skipper’s command, gave Maro a half hour’s examination as to his sanity. Maro was game cnough to decline to give the name of the enlisted man who hed told him he was eligible for ihe com- mand of the ship upon its belng ‘turned into the navy of Greece,’ but the thrashing he gave that be'sun’s mate when he got him ‘on the beach’ was certainly savage.” ——___ The Phonographic Alarm Clock. From the Philadelphia Ledger. Phonographic attachments to clocks ure extremely amusing if not wholly practical. The alarm is wound up as usual, and at a certain hour the phonographic attachment is brought into play and instead of a bell a call is shouted to the sleeper: “Get up, it's 5 o'clock.” Various forms of injunc- tion and invitation to rise may be given or one may be treated to a little sermonette on the relative merits of early and late ris- ing. Platitudes concerning the early bird may be indulged in and similar exhorta- tions need not be wanting. At the pres- ent rate of things one may have merely to wind up a clock in order to be lectured in the most approved fashion. The project of attaching to the kitchen clock a schedule of things for the matd to do might not be amiss. At a certain hour the clock could call out: “Put the roast in. the oven.” “ is thme to put the potatoes on to boil. “See that the pan under the ice box 1s emptied.” “Dor't forget to churn the but- ter.” Such reminders might be of extreme utility, the inventor furnishing brains and directions while the hands carry out these instructions. fa Ifyou want work read the want columns of The Star. a Bilkine—“Who was it wrote ‘Actions speak-louder than words?” Harper—“I don’t Know, but I'll bet the thought occurred jto fle he was try- ing to sneak up! Yat 3 o'clock in the morning.” —Chigago-News. = Se Promenade Gpncerts at Queen’s Hall. From Punch. note Portraits of the Conductor and ‘Vocalist. N.B.—Smoking is poomitees COMIC OPERA AT THE POST “A good deal of tommy-rot is written— always by persons totally unfamiliar with army life—of the alleged ‘exelusiveness’ ‘of atmy people—the officers and their women olks, that is to say,” remarked an army Officer wih 2 long and varied expertence at military ports on the southwestern fron- tier. ‘As a matter of faet, there is a very widespread spirit of hespitality in the American army, and in some of the menages in the more remote posts, where the officers and their wives and families are exceedingly intendependent for compan- ionship and social pleasure, you'll often run across the charming military Bo- hemianism that Frederic Remington and Owen Wister have so faithfully @ortrayed. For example, take that whirl of ours with the comic opera company down at Fort Huachuca a few years ago; that was about as delightfully unconventional and enjoy- able a peried of fun as I ever mixed in with. It involved a complete knocking down of social barriers=a thing which, I admit, could not happen in a military post more near to civilization—and yet there was nothing wrong or even questionable about it. On that occasion all of us at Huachuca —officers, enlisted men, officers’ wives and post laundresses—had more fun than a bushel of Gila monsters, and at the same time we gave an organization of distressed people a push along that I'll bet every one of 'em remembers with gractude to this moment of time. “The reckless, devil-may-care first ser- geant of one of the companies of infantry got us into it. He won a big bundle of money at poker from the men of his outtit, and got a ten-day leave of absence, in or- der to go to Deming, N. M., to blow his winnings in. By the time he had been in Deming for a few days he had cleaned t a couple of fiyer faro layouts and he had money to make bonfires with. On his sixth day in Deming the ‘broke’ comic opera company came along. The company, which consisted of eleven men and seventeen wo- men, had been having all kinds of hard luck throughout Arizona and New and Old Mex- ico, and when they struck Deming, al- though they had all of their effects and properties with them, they were up against it for fair. There wasn’t a dollar in the crowd, and, to make matters worse, the manager had skipped out and left them in the lurch. The tiger-smashing top ser- geant of ours got in talk with a couple of the men of the company soon after they struck Deming, and learned their hard luck story. He had an idea. “‘Come on.up to Fort Huachuca with me,” said he. ‘What on? asked one of the singers, hopelessly. “On me, of course,’ said the top soldier. “Do you own the post?’ asked the singer. “Very near it, just now,’ replied the first sergeant, ‘Just corral your bunch and we'll take the next train up to Huachuca. We've got a square command up there, and the officers and their women folks are the right sort and on the dead level. You'll get none worst of it at their hands.’ ‘The idea kind o’ caught the fancy of the company when it was explained to them by the two singers to whom ft had been suggested by the first sergeant, and they deeided to hit up Huachuca, just for luck—not that they considered the sergeant eligible to talk for the whole post, but it was a last resort, and they were in a bad hole. “Two days later the whole outfit, with the first sergeant at the front and sort of acting as scout, arrived on the outskirts of the post. There were fourteen buckboards, each holding two members of the company, behind him, and behind the buckboards were six four-mule road wagons loaded down with the company’s trunks and the scenery and properties. The top sergeant paid the big railroad and wagon transportation bill out of his winnings. The officer of the day met the curious-looking cavaieade on the garrison outskirts. What the devil is this. sergeant?” he asked, drawing the top soldier a little away from the crowd. “Comic opera fitout I’ve brought down from Deming,’ said the sergeant, and he tuid the story. The officer went away, grinning, to see the commanding officer— one of the finest soldiers and gentlemen that ever looked from beneath a peaked cap. “Sergeant Conroy's got a bunch of thir- comic opera singers, just in from Dem- ing, down near the corral,’ said the officer of the day to ‘the Beak.’ sir?” ‘Do they get in, ‘old man’s’ face wreathed into les. I wonder what that confounded ruf- fian'll be doing next?’ he exclaimed. ‘Why, the devilish nerve of him! Do they get In, sir? Of course they get in! Now. At once. They'll be a godsend in this general desolation. Just what this command would do w'thout that blackguard of a first ser- geant—you may just bring the whole outfit me At ence, sir. “By the time the twenty-eight members of the company, with the sergeant still at their head, were drawn up in their buck- boards in front of the c. 0.’s quarters, the whole command, officers and their families and enlisted men, had turned out. The ‘old man’ received the singers cordially, and the officers and their wives got into conference with him. Ten minutes jater all of the enteen | women—a_ mighty good-looking, chaved lot of women, too, they were re snugly quartered with the families of the married officers, and the eleven male singers—a gentlemanly set of fello comfortably fixed, all to themselves, unused barrack room. You never saw a post liven up like Huachuca did from the moment the company got in. The enlisted men spent all their time carrying Sergeant Conroy around on their shoulders and blowing him off at the canteen, and te officers and their wives told each other of the hundred and one occasions on which Conroy hal always done just the right thing at tre proper moment. When you reflect ur:n what 2 lonesome, dreary, off- the-earth garrison Huachuca is derstand what a godsend Conroy ing of the opera company for us was. “A big detail was set to work to rig up a quartermaster’s storeroom for a theater, and on the next night “The Mascotte’ was given am:d scenes of enthusiasm such as I never saw before or since. The company was really admirable. I don’t understand yet how such clever people ever got down in that country. Some of us hadn't seen a show of any kind for years, and you can imagine what children we were when these people, with first-class costumes, proper- ties and scenic effects, gave us such a tune- ful, pretty thing as “The Mascotte’ with finish, beauty and effect. The members of the company, too, seemed to be having just as much fun as we were—we were so tre- mendously appreciative, they said. The next night they did ‘Olivette’ for us. I've seen that opera done in a good many swell vheaters, but it never sounded so well to me as it did in Huachuca. We were all thoroughly mashed on the members of the company by this time, and hated to think of them leaving us. If the men had yielded to our persuasions not a one of ‘em would have been sober during the week ‘they spent with us, and our wives made much of the women singers and grew very fond of them. They stayed with us a week, giving us two more operas, ‘The Pirates of Pen- zance’ and ‘Jolanthe,’ and they had £2.80) of the post’s gladly-given money when they left us, cheering for Sergeant Conroy and Huachuca. They were all positively in tears when they quit us, and it took us all weeks to recover from the dumps after they moved out.” ees Thousands of situations have been ob- tained through the want columns of The Star. —— A Mud Shower. Steamers from the orient report that natives in the vicinity of Java are terror stricken and sailors on all vessels plying to the islands of the far east mystified and alarmed at a continuous shower of mud and asices, which turned day into darkness and lasted thirty-six hours. : The steamers Borreo and Real were coy- ered six inches deep with mud when the storm abated. The Real was on its way to Palso bay, and while in the Gulf of Tomini at 8 o'clock in the morning the mnd sto-m came on, suddenly followed by a heavy sea. One of the members of the crew was wash- ed overboard and drowned, and the steamer was with difficulty saved, naviga- tion being almost impossib!e. ‘The steamer Borneo sailed 1,807 miles through the storm. It reported that the faking substance was vompesed of about equal parts of mud, ashes and rain. Capt. Tuckey of the Borneo said that the natives at Dongal were terrified and prepared to flee for their lives. Scientists believe the mud came from a volcano on one of the islands situated in ‘the Gulf of Tomini. The whereabouts of the voicane bas not been located. ! PHILANDER. " JOHNSON? Orde Shall there be no relaxation? average person claim No respite from the jigging fascinations of a name? Shall the Must it be his sad misfortune to perpetually | dwell ‘Neath the rhyth orthographic spell? We've chased the nimble proper through Cuba’s martial scenes, Through Europe and the Orient hither past the Philippines. i And @ weary maxillary makes the reader glad to roam From these foreign complications to affairs much nearer home. incantation of some noun He turns from to discern How old New York is going this November. He will learn Of the way whole towns have risen to ap- plaud a single man; “Patchogue's” a blaze of glory that eclipses poor “Penn Yan.” Of the fight in “Cattaraugus” mighty tests of lung In “Otsego,” “Tioga” and “Chenango” and “Chemung,” Things are merry in “Schoharie” and old observers vow “Sehenectady” has never been much livelier than now. “Honolulu” and “Manila” and the “Go west,” the tempter whispers, And Ohio's list he'll sean, To see how “Cuyahoga” went when some old-timer ran. The syllables come clattering forth until his throat grows hot, “Scioto,” “Tuscarawas ‘Wyandot.” We'll no more be apprehensive as posses- sions heave in view; There can't be tasks much heavier than those we've all been through; There can't be harder trials placed before us by the fates Than the cast-off Dutch and “Injun” in our own United States. * x ox Some Psychic Research, The band of small girls had the stealthy tread and the surreptitious titter which be- trays youth on mischief bent. There was no doubt that they should have been in bed hours ago, but the manner in which enil- Gren escape the vigilance of their elders on such occasions will always be one of the mysteries of an otherwise progressive ctvi- lization. They were running on uup-loe to overtake a lady and a man who had Just gotten off the street car. The lady turned sharply. Why aren't. you at home?” she asked with remarkable fortitude. The answer came in a tone which b: ened full confidence in the righteousn: a cause: “We're out Halloweenin’.” “Well, what would you do if I were to take a handful of flour from under my cape and throw it all over you?" c “Why, you wouldn't do ythii e that, would you?” ipa le “I don’t know. You see, we're out Hal- loweenin’ ourselves. “Well, I s'pose it would have to go. But look here, you mustn't think we children do all that mischief.” Who is it “It's unruly spirits. It tells all them in a book up at our house.” “T never saw an ich spirit They're around, though. This is thetr chance to have fun. But they're too sharp to xet caught. They know how to hide. ut where do they go?” ‘Well, to tell you the truth, ma’. lieve they get inside us children. “Chillicothe,” about m, I be- A Pre ot A dirge for the era of doubt and suspense When the portals of youth slowly close! When paths that seemed easy grow tangled ana dense And hope now and then takes a doze. A dirge—not too sad—for that fitiless age When all startled you gaze o’er the scene And discover you're neither a lad nor a sage; That you're merely betwixt and between. You're not bald enough to command the respect Which to scalps well denuded is due; Your gray hairs encounter unfeeling neg- lect Because they're so dolefully few. The boys will not hail you as one of their clan, While the old fellows, sleek and serene, Still laugh at your troubles and call you “young man,” When you're merely betwixt and between. There are laughter and lights in the years left behind; There are laughter and lights still ahead; But the journey grows weary and long as you find The loneliness where you are led. Qh, better the infant who gnaws at a ring Or Methuselah stately, I ween, Than the man who must bow as they mock him and sing, “You are merely betwixt and between.” * * * Wiat He Needed. The young man who sat with both feet on a table gazing at a bookcase, full of leather-covered volumes, did not seem ex- actly happy, in spite of the Nesurely com- fort of his attitude. “What's the matter?” inquired the friend who had been trying to engage him in con- versation. Got the blues?” “Not precisely.” “I'll tell_you what you want to do. You want to come with me to the theater to- night.” ‘What for?” ° “Why, for recreation. You want to get your mind off your business.” “No. You've diagnosed the case wrong. I don’t get through more than two pages of one of those books before some piano- organ comes along and begins playing a tune that I've got to whistle in concert with it, whether I want to or not. By the time I've taken a fresh start and gotten half way through another paragraph, some man comes along with a hammer and be- gins to play the Anvil Chorus on a long iron stringer over by that new building. And before my intellect has groped along a few sentences further somebody drops in and tells me a funny story. That's all a mistake abdut a man’s wanting to get his mind off his business. What I need is learned all the rules by heart—never tramp your partner's ace, and when in doubt take the trick, and’ when the right bower is turned down, make it next, and all the rest of them.” I don’t see how you could have made a after fortifying yourself in that he commented gently didn’t make a mistake,” she protested. hen I don’t see what the matter cou mistak I know. Only I scarcely like to tell ye because I kno- you will think it ts super- stitious and silly. Did somebody put a charm on us?” “1 don't know whether it was done op purpose or not. But there wasn't ar chance for us to have any luck. Just t fore we played the hand that decided the rubber, I counted the cards. And do you know, Charley, dear,” she said, dropping her voice to an impressive whisper, “there were exactly thirteen a MARKET HABIT IN HAVANA. Queer Things One Buys in the Me« trepolis of Cuba, From the Chicago Inter-Ocean, The Havana market is crowded at day- break by Spanish, French, Chinese and col- ored cooks of both sexes, Some chefs, who affect the dignity of a coat, are accom- panied by their apprentices or scullic who carry baskets. Marketing is always done by cooks in Havana, because empleo. ers are aware that they can drive a bette bargain, even taking into account the per- qusites allowed them by tradespeople, Fish caught in Cuban waters are eape- cially nice, and the pargo, a species of red snapper, is very toothsome, as is the cherna, which tastes like salmon. No Ha- vana cook will buy fish unless they -are alive, and the fish market, with big tanks full of fresh fish, with white marble slabs and scales, 1s very picturesque. The other sea food ts also excellent, although the shrimps, lobsters and mussels are some- what small. The oysters grow on the sub- merged branches of shrubs and trees on the coast. These branches are broken off and seid in the market, but the Cuban oy ters are small and inferior to the Ameri- can. Terrapin and turtles are very fine, and tortoises have handsome shells, which bring a good price in the market. Sea crabs and land crabs are also good. The latter grow to a large size, and their bodies stand high from the ground on their enor- mous cla Land crabs burrow in holes, and their locomotion is clamsy, sounding like that of a drunken man. Cooks feed these crabs on cornmeal for several days before they cook them, as this makes them more palatable. A yorite way of fattening poultry in Cuba is to put them in barrels and stuff them with walnuts and cornmeal for se: eral days betore they are killed. Just bi tore Christmas turkeys are driven through the streets in droves of from 40 to 100, from door to door, for people to make their own selection eet is killed the day before it is used, for it cannot be kept fresh longer than one day on punt of the excessive heat When the cook returns from the market his presence is made known to the house- hold by squawking ducks, cackling hens or squealing pigs, for all such live stock are brought from the market, and they expr ulate angrily on being carried around in such close quarters. And pigeons ar doves, with soft ey tter a coving, plain- tive not though with d foreboding of the tragic fate in store for them. Captain Paget Under Fire. From Scribner's. It was in this fight that a shrapnel shell struck the road within ten inches of the foot of the British naval attache, Captain Paget, and lifted five Wisconsin volunteers off their feet and knocked them For a moment Paget was lost a cloud of dust ome expected down. view tn nd smoke, from which no to see him reappear aliv but he strode out of it untouched, remark- “There ing in a tone of extreme annoyance we hell in the Soudan once did that same thing to me.” His tone s suggest that there was a lim! any man’s patience. A few minutes later a solitary tree beneath which he was sitting was struck by another shell which killed two and wounded three men. Paget, who had been In a dozen campaigns, took it all as a matter of course, and assisted one of the wounded men out of the range of the bul- iets from the side of a steep and high hill The sight did more to popularize the Anglo- American aillance with the soldiers than could the weightiest argument of ambassa- dors or statesmen. — + e+ Humors of Balnklava. From the Cornhill Magazine. Of that mad but heroic charge a bun- Gred incidents are preserved—thriling, hu- morous, shocking. A man of the 17th Lan- cers, for example, was heard to shout, ju as they raced in upon the guns, a quota- tion from Shakespeare, “Who is there here would ask more men from England!" ‘1! regimental butcher of the 17th Lancers engaged in killing sheep when ho the trumpets sound for the charge. leaded on a horse; bare arms and pipe in mouth, he through the whole charge, slew, it is saic six men with his own hand, am’ caine back again, pipe still in mouth! A private of the llth was under arrest for drunkenness when the charge began; but he broke ut, followed his troop on a spare hors2, picked up a sword as he rode and shared in the rapture and perils of the clurg>. The charge lasted tweity minutes, and ever before such dariag cr sach suf eung packed into a space co brief. ‘The squad- rons rode into the fight nurabering 673 horsemen; their mounted strength wren the fight was over was exactly 195. IE NSS Pen ST ‘The Kaiser's Big Soldiers. From the Londen Obrentcle. “The tallest man in his army,” who is ac- companying the German emperor in the visit to the east, is a grenadier named Chiemke, who is nearly six feet ten inches in his stockings. This Frederick William mania of the kaiser’s is an old device of his for impressing the foreigner. On re- turning from his first visit to Constantino- ple in 1889 the emperor sent the sultan a complete set of kettledrums, which he in- trusted to the tallest officer in hi army, Lieutenant Pleskow, who is very little, if at all, under seven feet. Once, indeed. when this Prussian guardsman looked over a seven-foot garden wall and asked a girl picking gooseberries therein what was the Way to so-and-so, the simple maiden told him to ride first to the right and then to the left, and he would find the place he wanted. The nympb had honestly fancied that an officer overpeering her garden wall like that must necessarily be on horseback! Females reread (Copyright, 1898, Life Publishing Company.) as heard He in shirt sleeves, with