Evening Star Newspaper, October 29, 1898, Page 14

are between 250,000 and 300,000 of mica used in the United States * said a wholesale dealer in that New York to a writer for The punds yall, cently. “North Carolina, New and other once supplied " used in country, but so material been utilized years in various arts and s that many of our most -s have been pretty nearly e is that about lal is now imported m Norway, Sw and Russia, and the to shipping it to this coun- expe try has price of the article 20 per | ‘ The wholesale price fc a pound, of the sheet, may be expected are not soon dis- varies from 1a still larger Americ $1 Phe material is largely used In the arts S i sa for spe nall obje a microscope. ground, for Sheet mica is used, as Is d of glass in places ex- as reflectors, headlight t antern lights. On naval 3 the place of glass in is not easily C y guns. e is a com- ve process. in upright are ily nt rock. Then up of the stra om the ad. New Hamp: is worth from a home a lith street baker i originated in this 1 us to the n intimate acquaintance for forty years, and je and handled As it was orig- , though it fell war, when cer- srts to produce not so very composed of. made, con: exact e had t ng t me have ma of it. fin imm: were f odds and ends o bakeshor as if they were re not whole they up in SS was milk or | in and | put wn erust younger en knowing | pie, when | ‘actical- lw and alway pat bout two and was In ty other pi bout ft, found x it to their There were sold by the During thi > for Washtr gh, of cour of it ton about it d way to t quantities at wn Washington tit x * her it is complimen- 1 do know that it is of the aver Wash- s s than t of the Ke y y other cities,” k ing s an for a larg ‘_p oma turing firm to a s All engaged in the 1 ade know and have i erience. h altimore rag aller than t is known t i an always ge rge sizes of boys’ ay I hav a boy ed by the leav- larger sizes the wanted them 2 5 eads of the boy | How a Moun | trying to drive th as ed in nat fact certainty 2 in my own ex- . matey wot ‘appened *e reports as ‘wash ‘is bloamin’ ud Bluejacket—“Leftenant, jean, an’ captin’ ‘e ses, is bloumin’ ‘air, every ten minnits! THE EVENING STAR, SATURDAY, OCTOBER 29, 1898-24 PAGES. perience as well as that of many others en- gaged in the business. We in the hat trade also know that politicians as a class wear the largest size hats.” ee KOK OK “T have recently spent some days in the national library hunting for the origin -of the phrase ‘Georgia crackers,’ observed a prominent southern Hterary man to a Star reporter, “and was surprised at the small amount of reliable information that I found there on the subject. What sur- prised me more than any other one fact I learned was that the term cracker seems to have originated in New England, and is not a southern coining at all. In 1760 the term Is used several times in newspaper articles printed in Boston, though the ar- ticles may have been written by a south- ern man, who may have gone there from Georgia, which was settled twenty years before that. The general impression in Georgia is that the term cracker applies to any southern white person of a low grade, an ignorant mountaineer or country person, but as far as I have been able to learn it has no more reference to Geor- gia than any other of the southern states. Some writers have gone into the subject very thoroughly, but they admit that they had to draw thelr own conclu- ions in the absence of positive informa- tion. Originally, before railroads, or, in- deed, any othe roads, were constructed, there was a great deal of hauling across the country to the seaports, principally to Savannah. The drivers of these teams used ve were heard by the cracking of the whips long before they came in sight. It is rea- sonable to suppose that this may have had something to do with the origin of the term cracker. Some very careful southern writers think the term arose from the cracking of the rifles of the Georgia hunt- ers, while others are of the opinion that the cracking of whips or rifles had noth- ing to do with its origin; that the word cracker was simply a name given to poor white sand-hiller: xk RK x “The remarks in a recent issue of The Star about independent clerks ‘being the best kind of clerks in the departmental rvice has cause more comment in th departments than any short article I have said a Treasury Department touched ever read,’ ial to a Star reporter. ie upon a subject that is close to the more departmental clerks in this city. is true, as stated, that the best clerk is the or woman who gets down to work romptly at 9 o kK and gets up as romptly when the clock strikes 4, giving no extra time for the purpose of making a record for efficient The record of gov- ernment clerks, the efficiency part of their record 1 mean, {s based upon the amount and character of the work done during office hours, and not upon that done before or after office hours. It is all right, of course, for a clerk to be ambitious and to to do a good day’s work in the offi but 1 take but little stock in the clerk wh oniy claim to efficiency is that he wants to get in the offic early or to lin closing time. his etficienc a half hour er there a half hour after He makes a dress parade of and to that extent, if not more than t 2 is not a good clerk, for the reas interferes with ‘di cipline antagonisms, which a: harmful. fency clerk is not a young man who would naturally be suppo: to have more ambition than an old-timer, but is gene past midd age, who has been engaged in many of ‘business and foreed by circum » acc ern position. There clerks in most on in id they about er, and that a poor caliber, as far as real ability and a capacity to do a fair day’s work are concerned.” is one A RELIGION TEST, aineer Was to Prove His Qualifications, “I was away upon the headwaters of the Sandy rece aid the shoe drummer, Lt vered something new, even jn that land of yesterdays and eventl Ss. I was riding along a creek valley where F told lived @ mountain preacher who ad a practical idea of what reiigion hould do fo: experienced tt and had adop of putting his ideas into pra reached a ris = bottom a yui into a potato patch ¢ ould reach him he had follow the pig through the narrow gate an it out again. It struck me uliar proceeding, and when | came gate L pulled up my horse and qi young fellow and the pi ls if you never tried to get a pig out of a | potato patch you can ferm no idea of what @ job it ts, and as [ watched this young mountaineer patient ch the pig hither and yon, getting it well headed to- ward the gate only to have it double on Fim and go b: 0 the patch again after tir what nner of yc ad come into the mo Finally he brougnt it over very carefully and as he got it al- ou it gave a sudden grant ar and into the patch 2 in it went. “Gosh dang the hog,’ he said, puffing blowing and mopping his face with shirt sleeve, Why didn't you say that before? I laughing. xcuse me, stranger,’ he sald, noticing r the firs e, ‘I didn’t see you wa. thar.’ and he f d violently and seemed to be greatly confused “Oh, that’s all right,’ I hastened to say, I only wonder you didn’t the lard out of him. Well, I reckon I don’t ker a durn,’ said, ‘I done the best I knowed.’ ‘How do you mean? I inquired, catch- z idea of the situation all at once. You don't know it, I reckon, bein’ a stranger in these parts,’ he said, ‘but Elder Martin sot me to doin’ that to see ef I wuz ripe fer religion yit. I've had a notion fer about a year past that I ought to be j'intn’ the church and I told Elder Martin, and he saif ez how he had his doubts yit ef 1 wuz ripe, and he said ef I'd drive one of Sam * razerbacks outen pap's tater patch without cussin’ ripe and that's what I a oath I wuz been a-doin." “Judging by what I heard you say a while ago I should say you were not ripe.’ 1 said. laughing at his explanation and mar of it. “Oh, he ¢ med, * t ain’t no sign, I'm jis’ pra’ The real thing don’t come off next week Sunday at arte au ly meetin. > — Situations Secured. Many situations are secured through tne Want advertisements in The Star. TH® cost is but triffi n cents pays for fifteen words. +. An Easy Question. “Why did at Has th Normans and ow I were dirty, an’ my ‘ammick neck, scrub ‘is bloomin’ face '—Punch. y large and long whips, and they | T WAS A GOOD THING “There was many a ‘good thing’ pulled off at Alexander Island, across the river, when that extraordinary outlaw track was in operation,” said @ Washington man who used to be interested in horse racing, “and, after the extinguisher was put on the track and it was all over, stories of the ‘ringers’ that had been put over the home plate were numerous enough, and some of them pretty well sub- stantiated, at that. But I only recently heard the details of one very lucrative ‘ringer’ operation that was brought off over there with so much ingenuity that even the men who were hit the hardest—the bookmakers, that is to say—didn’t have the remotest suspicion that they were being ‘done,’ and probably haven't any such sus- picion down to the present moment. “One evening a shabby-looking chap ap- peared at a rendezvous of the bookmakers on E street near 13th. He looked like a stableman, and he soon got into talk with some of the bookmakers. He ‘touched’ sev- eral of them for the loan of $30. “ ‘I've got a pair of skates over at one of the outlaw tracks in Maryland,’ was his story, ‘and neither one of ‘em’ has been one, two, six in any of the races over there. Maybe they can do better down at Alexan- der Island. I want to bring ‘em down to Alexander Island, anyhow, and try to win out their feed bill. I owe a $30 stabling bill at the Maryland track, and they won't Jot me have the nags until it’s paid. That's what I want to do with the $30.’ “The bookmakers all shied when the shabby-looking man made his touch, and some of them gave him the laugh. “TI can get all the outlaw racers I want for two dollars,’ one of the bookies sald to the rough-looking customer, who appeared to be thoroughly down on his luck. He left the headquarters of the ticket writers with a look of great disappointment on his fea- tures. “A few days later the shabby-looking man appeared at the Alexander Island track with his two horses. The bookies noticed the man hanging around the pad- dock, and they asked him how he had raised the $30 to get his pair of plugs out of hock. “Oh, I dug for it,’ said the man, and the bookies forgot all about him until, a couple of days later, one of the man’s horses was entered 1or a six-furlong race. The rough-looking chap showed up in the betting ring just before the race and put down a Yew $2 and $5 bets on his horse at 10 to 1. A jockey that traveled with the stranger rode his horse in that first race, and the nag was in the ruck all the way and finished a rank last. he shabby owner of the string of two outlaw racers turned up at the bookmakers’ headquarters that same evening, and the layers guyed him a good deal about the showing his horse had made in the after- noon. “ ‘He couldn’t head a bull up a lane,’ said one of them. “The stranger smiled ruefully under the ra a: wasn't much account, for a fact, this afternoon,’ he said, with a disappointed air. ‘Why, he went on, ‘I've seen that horse go six furlongs in 1.25 flat.’ at 25! exclaimed one of bookma. yok here, pardner, you're not jay enough to imagine that you're going to win money with any horse lexander {sland that has only got urlong record of 1.25, are you Well, I'm going to try and see what I can do,’ answered the rough-looking man, doggedly “Two days later the same horse was en- tered in another six-furlong race. The horse went to the post at 30 to 1, and fin- ished eighth in a field of nine horses. The owner lost a few $2 and $5 bets again on his nag. the “The same horse was entered in three more rac within the next week; “ihe tran: coke} ng him right along, and the horse never fini ng better than fifth. He was a ragged, bony, gaunt-look. ing te, that horse, and the bookmake: noting his poor very time he went to the p him right alo have written y , lengthened the odds on until you could practically our own ticket if you had m. ace for which the stranger's : ered was at a mile, and there e nine other pretty good outlaw racers in the bunch that went to the post. The shabby man’s horse was the rank outsider, and there was any amount of 100 to 1 to be had on him. A few minutes before they Were off the owner of the two plugs ap- peared in the betting ring. He went around to ten of the ookmakers who were drawing in and put a gree 5 bill down with each one of them on his horse to win at 100 to 1. The bookmakers grinned in his teeth as they took his money, which he seemed to hand over very reluctantly. “It's the last dust I got,’ said the man, -ctedly, ‘but a mile’s that horse's dis: tance, and he’s got a look-in, anyhow “There was a. considerable delay at the post, and en the horses did at length get away the shabby man’s brute was left standing almost flat-foot The boy on him got him going, however, although he looked hopeles beaten by the start. Passing the grand stand the first time around, the abby man’s horse had got up with the rear bunch, and he seemed to be running mighty smooth and easy for a rank outsider. At the far turn on the y home the horse was seen to set sail for the first bunch of four horses in the lead, and the wise people in the stand thought he was going almighty well for a 100 to 1 shot. At the head of the stretch the horse seemed to falter a bit, but the boy went to work on him with whip and spur, and he responded gamely. He came down the stretch like a cyclone, but the boy, knowing his bu s, drew it fine by taking about forty wraps on the racer, and he just won by a short head on the wire from the favorite. It was the big dump of the meeting. “The rough-looking owner of horses came around to the betting ring as soon as the as confirmed, and col- lected his $5,000 bundle from’ the ten bookies. They were totally unsuspictous, the man seemed such an ignoramu: ““T knowed a mile was that ho: f: e, he told them. was down in St. Louis tht and I ran across the shabby-looki at the fair grounds track. He was no longer shabby. On the contrary, he wore gsig-lamps, and a lot of ‘em. I reminded him of the day he pulled off the 100 to 1 shot with his cheap outiaw plug. “Not such a cheap outlaw plug, at that,’ said he to me, with a grin. ‘The horse was one of the cracks of the west, and 1 was ‘ringing’ him along for another man. The horse could do six furlongs in 1.14 flat without even pusing over it, and he was in the 1.3914 class at a mile. My pardner and myself picked up nearly $20,000 on him, en- tering him as a cavalry nag. The time he won at Alexander Island the boy on him had all he coul. do to keep the horse from nning by eight city blocks, which would have queered the game by’ exciting sus- picion.’ ” the two S dis- summer ng man ee And the Boy Smiltea. An absent-minded man stood on the ave- nue the other day and a newsboy c and sold him a Star. He glanced at the headlines and tucked it under his arm, while he gazed down 14th street looking for the Belt line car that never came. So absorbed did he become in this occupation that he dropped The Star on the pavement. The same boy that had sold it to him picked it up, and, waiting a few moments, again approached the man ana offered it for sale. “Why, I had a Star a few min- utes ago,” he said, “and I bought it of a boy Just about your size.” The boy looked at him stolidly, holding out the paper. Fumbling in his pocket the man fished out the 2 cents that he had received in change for his nickel at the former transaction. “I have but 2 cents,and no more change,” said the absent-minded man. “Pil let yer have it for 2 cents,” said the boy. The trade was made and the belated car came along, and as he swung aboard and looked back ‘he saw the first evidence of sharp eS ‘The boy was grinning broadly at him. z ame up ——.__. w College Text Books. From Puck, Cynthia—‘Here’s ancther letter from Hiram, at college. He wants twenty dol- lars more to buy more school bcoks. Reuben—“Great Dumplings! That boy’ll put a mortgage on the farm yit. What Looks does he want now?” Cynthia—‘“Here’s the list: ‘Gilligan on Tacklirg,’ ‘Short Rules for Bucking the Center,” ‘The History of the Game,’ ‘Les- sons in Punting,’ “The Signal System’ and ‘First Aid to the Injured.’ ” MISSED THEIR TOBACCO “Tt has struck me t along that the newspapers of ,the yellow vaviety have been making a terrific: hullabaloo over the way things weré run @own in Cuba, Porto Rico, and in the Am camps. with very little reliable infcrmation upon which to bese their chargos,” said an officer of the 24th Infantry (one of the negro “egiments), who was struck by tifree Mauser bullets— bedly wounded by one of them—and a piece of shell in the fight at Sar Juan. “I didn't see much‘to complain about under the circumstances down in Cua, and I nad a pretty fair chance to see what was going on. The only genuine criticism, in fact, that I have to’make refers to the scarcity of tebacco dmong the troops down there. Tobacco was at a premiam during the greater portion of our stay in Cuba, and the soldiers who were deprived of it would very willingly have paid fcr it at the price of its weight in gold. I don't think it would be possible to overestimate the value of tobacco to troops undergoing a hard campaign. It ts bread and meat and drink to a soldier enduring the hardships of war It is at once a stimul:nt and a tonic, and its value in allaying bunger is well known to experienced commanders. Queer as it may seem, chewing tobacco also allays thirst. I know this, because I've tried it. Another point with’ reference to the chewing of tobacco by soldiers in a campaign fs that all of the old-timers swal- low the juice of the weed. They allow that {t is apt to make fellows not used to band- ling it in that way a bit sick at first, but they say that the stimulating effect of the plant is lost if the juice 1s expectorated. I never had a better illustration of the Value of tobacco to men who had long been hankering for it than on the day of the San Juan fight. The black soldiers of my outfit of the 24th had been entirely to- baccoless almost from the time we landed in Cuba, and it was the hardest kind of a deprivation upon men who had been used for years to consuming the weed in all its forms. The men missed tobacco par- ticularly after meals. After they got out- side of thelr coffee they would get to- gether and talk longingly of tobacco, and i could just see their teeth leaking for It, but there wasn’t a quarter of an ounce to be had. I don’t hesitate to say that the men of my company weren't quite the same without tobacco, and a number of them frankly said that they'd rather be without grub than to go tobaccoless. “On the morning of the San Juan scrap I came into the proud possession of a one- pound plug of chewing tobacco. I’m not going to incriminate myself by stating how I happened to get the plug, but I got it all the same. A short time before it came our turn to go into the action, I produced the plug and handed it to the big, black top sergeant of my company. You ought to have seen his eyes stick out when he caught sight of the ping. “‘Just pass It down the line,” I told him, ‘and let each of the boys take a nibble off at “The sergeant took a bite off the plug himself, and then handed it to the first duty sergeant. The whole company was ‘on to’ the presence of the plug of tobacco in the outfit by this time, and they set up a cheer. They just forgot all about the impending fight, they were so tickled over the sight of the tobacco. The plug went down the line, every man taking off a bite, and then it started up the Ine and toward me again. It certainly did dwindle in size, that plug of tobacco, By the time it got into the hands of the.top sergeant, it was just the size of one geod chew, which the men had, by careful calculation, saved for me, ‘the loot’nant.’ Did I take it? Well, I guess yes, and swallowed every bit of the juice, like all thé restiof the men. And I can tell you it tasted food. The men threw their shoulders h&ck under the stimulus of the tobacco, and became perky and sassy ond fighty all through—and T suppose you remember what“the 24th did in the San Juan fight? I had thd chew in my mouth, ng it hugely, when the last of the three Mausers that plugged me got me in the hips, paralyzing me from the w down for a coupfe of months after and, as I didn't besome unconscio: erjoyed that chew even after I was hit. No Wonder the Editor Was Stanned With Surprise. The country fournalist; having concluded his work of devil, printer, bookkeeper, job printer, reporter, editor, press hand, mailing clerk, collectcr, compositor, and ad solicitor for the day, had sat down to study out what string to pull to get enough money to meet a note of $14.38 coming due next Saturday, when a man he did not know came into the office and sat down without being asked to do so. For a min- ute he looked around the place and at the presiding spirit of it before he spoke. “You are,” he said slowly, “the proprie- tor of this establishment, and it is a news- paper office? “It is,” replied the wondering editor. “And this is your product?” he said, hold- ing up that week's issue. “A newspaper?” The herald of a nofsy world itor dreamily. Yes.” ‘The million-folded multiple of thought?” vanes ‘The hasty record of the world’s affairs?” . “The molder of public opinion?” “Yes.” said the journalist, looking wor- ne Mtan's daily doings done in ink?” Yes.”” “The richest treasure of the art preserva- tive of arts?” Yes.” he Archimedean lever that moves the es/ > andloyalthta tirasittie eaten was getting ready to escape by the window. ’ sald the “An all for a dollar a year,” said the visitor, still in that dreamy tone, as he let his soft blue eye fall over the page. “It's a durn shame,” he went on, going down into his pocket, “here’s two dollars, and Vil send you in a cord of wooll and a bushel of apples and four gallons of cider next week.” Then he got up and went out with- out so much as saying “good-bye” and the editor gazed stupidly at the two-dollar bill on his knee. —_—_>—__ Just a Few Questions. A small boy, who said he was eleven years old, came into the office of a Wash- ington correspondent recently, and asked that the following questions be answered for him in order that he might return them to his teacher who had given them: “In what way is peace to be decided be- tween the United States and Spain? Where are the peace commissioners to meet? How many commissioners does each coun- try send? Name the American commis- sioners. Who is the chief commissioner? What position did he occupy before he Was appointed ‘commissioner? Who ap- pointed the commission? What questions are the commissigners to decide?” The newspapen man said that if he could answer the last question he would score the biggest beat’of the year, but he had no doubt that the teacher who gave the eleven-year-old boy the list felt herself capable of telling right off-hand what the questions were that, the commissioners Were to decide, although it has taken the commissioners several Weeks to do so, and the end is not yet. © > ———— Woman's Rights. When lovely woman‘obtains equal rights with man she m@St expect a few disagreea- bles to balance the pfivilege. Such is the case in South Australia, where women have a vote and other desired rights. So a hus- band has just stied his wife for mainten- ance, claiming that-#he left him without reasonable means of “support, —— Periodic Shower, The great periodic star shower which 1s seen at intervals of thirty-three and a half years is due November 12 or 13, 1899. On the same dates this year, also, a consid- erable display of these meteors is expected. They are supposed to consist of matter which is cold until rendered incandescent by friction with the earth’s atmosphere. —— ‘Why They Hurt. From London Judy, > “You look dreadfully battered; how is that?” “Wife has ‘been pelting me with flowers.”” “Why, that wouldn’t mark you in that fashion.” a a “Obrthey were in the pots.” WHERE SILENCE REIGNED “One of the queerest assignments that was ever dished out to me when I was re- porting in Chicago,” said one of the cor- respondents from the city by the unsalted sea, ‘was the ‘covering’ of*a picnic of deaf and dumb people. There was, and is yet; a big organization, got together for social Pleasures, of these afflicted people in Chi- cago, and it was this organization that gave the picnic out at Elliott’s Grove, a wooded patch about fifteen miles outside of Chicago, on the occasion I speak of. When I got aboard the Illinois Central train that teok the party of 700 or 800—men, women and children—members of the deaf and dumb organization out to the grove, I found that there was but one other re- porter on the train, a pal with whom I had often worked before. We got together tm- mediately, of course, and we roasted the dreariness of the assignment to a finish— for, leaving out the train hands, we seem- ed to be the only two on the train who could talk. “Nice, cheerful job, this,’ growled the man from the other paper, looking around disconsolately. ‘And the beauty of it is, we can’t get back until about 8 o'clock tonight, for that’s the hour the train stops to bring the crowd back, and it’s the only train that stops at Elliott's Grove, at that. That gives us eleven solid hours of this hilarity. Bully good time we're going to have, I don’t think.” “The outlook for a day of unmitigated joy didn’t look promising, for a fact, and I seconded his growl lustily, but I took the thing a bit more philosophically than- he did, and soon became interested in watch- ing the actions of the deaf and dumb peo- ple. There always had been, in fact, a fas- cination for me in studying the moves of Persons afflicted with loss of hearing and voice, but I had never, of course, had an opportunity before of observing their clever peculiarities on such a large scale. The si- lent, yet animated, greetings that all hands on @ car would extend to newcomers were wonderfully interesting. The newcomers appeared to be made to feel their welcome just as strongly as if a hundred throats had shouted it at them. The little deaf end dumb girls and boys—few of them children of the grown excursionists, but given into their care for the day—played and romped in the car aisles, and seemed to get just as much fun out of it as kids in full possession of their lungs and hearing. The committeemen of the picnic party didn’t quite understand it when they no- ticed the other reporter and myself talking together, but when we showed them our silver reportorial stars—newspaper report- ers all carry these badges pinned to their left suspender straps in Chicago—they took us In hand, in the hospitable way that deaf and dumb folks have, and made us wel- come, “It surely was remarkable to note the fun every member of that crowd of mutes seemed to be having when the grove was reached and the pfenic proper began. You could hear the wind stirring the leaves of the trees all the time, and yet there were nearly 800 people having all kinds of fun right beneath the trees. The silence was extraordinary, considering the number of people you saw moving around. The young fellows put up swings and swung the girls, and, although the girls, of course, didn’t let out a cheep, much le they went a-sailing in the air, they certain- ly looked as if they enjoyed the swinging sensation as much as girls with voices and the capacity to giggle and scream. Two nines among the young men drew away in- to an open space and began a game of ball. There was very little kicking over the voiceless decisions of the umpire. When any of the players thought they had a kick coming, they gathered around the umpire with all Kinds of frenzied gesticulations. The umpire wouldn't pay a particle of at- tention to them. He'd elevate his chin and look right up into the blue arch of heaven. Then he'd point out to the field without so much as making the letter ‘a’ of the alpha- . and they'd march back to their sta- There was a shooting gallery, run a mute. Instead of bells to mark bull's- eye shots, a contraption would shoot up at the rear of the target. The guns made hardly any report—they were air guns— for the noise of a gun's discharge, I was told, hurts the ears of deaf persons. “The queerest thing to see, however, was the dancing. There was a big dancing pa- vilion in the grove. and nearly all of the young people danced. The master of cere- Monies stood on a platform and waved his arms, in waltz, or two-step, or whatever time the dance called for, and the dancers kept remarkably good time. They watched the man doing the arm-waving carefully out of the tails of their eyes as they floated around. The master of ceremonies was a rattling good pantomimist, and he'd ‘call off’ the various figures of square dances by going through, at the beginning of each figure, the various movements thereof—just enough of it to refresh the memories of the dancers. “Along toward noon, when we two re- porters began to get lonesome for a lunch room—there were no eatables for sale on the grounds, all of the mutes bringing their lunches in baskets—one of the committee- men introduced us to a couple o’ mighty nice-looking girls. Neither of us knew the first move of the deaf and dumb alphabet, but the girls didn’t look disappointed, some- how or another, when we informed them by signs of our ignorance. Instead, they laughed and looked at each other merrily. Each of the girls had a big basketful of swell things to eat, and they invited us, by cordial signs, to share the contents of the baskets with them. I'm ashamed to reflect upon how much of those girls’ nice feod I ate. We got along splendidly with the girls by means of signs, ignorant as we were of the-mute alphabet. I couldn’t help but think all the time what a pity it was that two such smart-looking young women should be deprived of the power of hear- ing, much less of speech. Thef seemed to take it all very cheerfully, however, and they appeared to have a good deal of fun between themselves, for often during the afternoon I caught them exchanging glances and smiling, as if they were sort of ‘holding out’ sometu..ng on us, This seemed a bit puzzling to me until tfe train pulled Into .w.e depot in Chicago on the re- turn trip in the evening. My friend and myself were just about to bid the two young women adieu by means of our own little sign manual, when they both burst into merry laughter. My pal and I stood in the aisle like a pair of petrified men. “You need not look so intensely sur- prised,’ one of the girls than said, smiling, in as musical a voice as you ever heard. ‘We saw that you took us for mutes when you were presented to us—naturally enough, too —and so we both decided spontaneously and simultaneously to be mutes for an afternoon. We are simply friends of some of the ladies among the mute excursion- ists, and so we came along with them. Now we've got to rejoin them. Good-bye,’ and they both laughingly took their de- parture for another car to find their women friends. “Y wonder did we say anything on the side?? my pal asked me, but I was too knocked out to answer him.” ——— Wants Quickly Filled. At this season, when so many are seek- ing situations, and, on the other hand, so many seeking employes, it is of interest to know that advertisements under the classifications Wanted Help and Wanted Situations are inserted in The Star at a charge of 15 cents for fifteen words. The First Birthday. (Copyright, 1898, Life Publishing Company.) Eve (insinuatingly)—“Have you forgot- ten, Adam, that this is my birthday?” JOHNSON? At the County Fair. The pumpkin ticketed “Ist Prize,” With indignation said it: “Mine is the brilliancy and size, Yet man gets all the credit.’ The farmer figured up the cost And sighed, “It’s the old story: My cash and energy I’ve lost To build a pumpkin’s glor: And neither one to ponder stops, Midst envy thus alarmin; There'd be no farming without crops, Nor crops without the farming. * * o* Wholly Unkind. “I wonder why it is!” exclaimed Willie Wishingts1, as he scanned the theater with the opera glass. “Is your mind puzzled again?” Miss Cayenne. “Yes. There is Miss Prudington in that same seat.” “Is her escort that scared-looking young man with his hair plastered over Ms tem- ples?” she asked, restraining an 'mpulse to leok around. “Yes.” “Is the seat away back by the wall?” “Yes. It isn’t what I'd call a good place at all. You can’t see all that takes place on the stage. I should think he'd have taken care to secure a better place.” “It’s not his fault. He’d get the seats wherever she wished. There is a radiator right behind those seats.” Is there? That's calculated to mako it still more undesirable. It’s making her face red already.” “Have you observed the character of many of the plays we have been getting of late?” “You mean as to —er—" “Their riskiness; yes. That explains why she probably picks out that warm place. She’s afraid she mightn’t blush.” * asked x Easily Accomplished. “Yes,” said Farmer Corntossel, “when Josiar fust come home from bein’ educated he was too sporty for anything. If there was anything that he was more than sporty, It was obstinate. But he’s all over it. He's jest as yieldin’ now as kin be, an’ I don’t believe he ever thinks of bettin’. Not in this neighborhood, anyhow.” “Did you lecture him?” inquired neighbor. “No. I wan't so foolish. I knew lectur- in’ wouldn't do no good. He thinks I ain’t in his class, an’ if I was to express an opinion he'd more’n likely take it for granted that the opposite was facts.” “Did you resort to threats?” : er. I don’t have to. I’m a natural born diplomat.” “Well, if you didn’t persuade nor yet threaten, I don't see how you managed. He's too’ big to lick.” “Did you ever drive a pig?” the e: “Did you ever drive more’n one at once?” Then you'll understand how easy it was. All 1 done to take the conceit clean out o' Josiar was to bet him he couldn't drive four pigs from here to town past the place where three roads cross.”" * x x A Military Disclosure. It ain't to be expected this great land’ll realize That in me it has @ personage to cherish an’ to prize; Folks ain't advanced enough to know "bout telepathic waves An’ the mysterious way that anything like that behaves. But scientific people like ourselves is well aware : That what you say an’ think kin be trans- mitted anywhere, I didn’t git close to the we-, I’m willin’ to allow, But all the neighbors know that I’m the man as told 'em how. I'll take you home and let you see the very piece o’ chalk With which I figgered out campaigns when Ta sit down an’ talk; An’ you kin ast most anybody over to the store if things them generals did wa’n't planned by me some days before. I Knew right from the first—I had it mapped out plain as day— That we'd find their solar plexus if they’d only fight my way. I'm far too patriotic to rise an’ raise a row, But jes’ the same, I’m sure that it was me as told ’em how. ‘Tain’t nothin’ so uncommon, as your his- try book explains, Fur men to reap the benefit of other folks’s brains. An’ when you git a new idee an’ start it in the air It's ible, in this age o’ steam, to land most anywhere. L ain't a bit disgruntled. No, sirree. I says, says I, “It's results that I was after; an’ results is what I spy.” I'm proud as if I had a hedge o’ laurels on my brow To sit an’ realize that I'm the man who told "em how. * “* A Burst of Enterprise. “Lemuel,” said tha editor of the Pohick Clarion, “if you.don’t stop acting so glum and unsociable I'll take you off the job of reeding exchanges and writing editorials and set you to washing roliers again.” “I don’t care,” answered the youth gloomily. “There's no use of us tryin’ to be progressive. We ain't in the push.” “What do you want now?” asked the old gentleman gently, as he pushed his spec- tacles up over his brow. “You know I welcome improve: nts. “We ought to illustrate more.” “We've had scms very good pictures.” “I mean decorative pictures, Pictures of actors showin’ just how they behave when they act.” “Well, Lemuel, do you know any act- ors?” . There's one in town.” ‘All right. You take the camera we got in exchange for advertising and get some photographs and have them sent right to town to be put in shape for the press, and apaieam write the article up to sult your- self. A few days after appeared: THE CLARION AGAIN LEADS. Don't miss our art supplement. Order early. The magnificent representations in life- like poses of the great actor, Mr. Orestes Van Ham surpass anything herstofore at- tempted in American journalism.” -In the next issue of the paper was the following articl A GREAT TRAGEDIAN. Mr. Orestes Van Ham, who has been bearding with Mrs. Egginfry for the last four months, thre> weeks and five days (these figures are accurate, having been ob- tained from Mrs. Egginfry herself), has finally consented to give the Clarion a few pictures of himself and his new play, in which he will app2ar next season, or if not, next, the season after. We also take occasion to recommend in this connection pees eee “Indeed, I haven't! My ribs ache yet!” the ‘Goodthing Camera,’ which we have used in obtaining the novel and original results which are sure to set the ,rtistic world aflame with ambition to rival what it cannot hope to equal. The first picturs represents Mr. Van Hamm in the act of saying: “Stand back! You have deeply injured ma, but for her sake I do not wish to do you harm.” He prides himself on his gestures One the most eff ctive scenes in the new play is one in which a fight takes place. Mr. Van Ham has three hand-to-hand contests in a lonely spot on the st While « gaging th> fourth villain he faints, and his adversary say | “We are even at last, curse you,” and walks away. This picture shows him alone tn the forest, with darkness drawing on, and no chance of his escaping from the footpads and coyotes if the heroine should happen to miss her cue, “AFTER THE DUEL. In the last act he ascends to the perilous heights of an oil-derrick. While he is there the villain comes and saws the timbers out from under him and vows he sh then and there unless the heroine to fly with him. But the hero ‘Sa match a! declares that villain quits fooling he will drop a lighted cigare » the oil well and blow up the entire perish town: ee eA eS Nd “A MOMENT OF AWFUL PERIL.” Perhaps the most unusual and noteworthy art achievement is a piciure of the Policemen who appear in the station- use scene. The warmth of the room where thi te was developed caused the P film to melt, which produc Japanese effect. Sa very dainty “THE POLICE Mr. Van Ham's preparations afford a grat- ifying assurance that things theatrical are going to be right lively pretty soo LEMUEL GiGGINS, Special Artist and Correspondent for the Clarion. And when the Clarion’s proprietor saw the paper he exclaimed “Lom, you're a wonder. You've’ done your full share toward maintaining “he reputation of the times and help keep pos+ terity guessing what this generation was ying to do with itself. Posters aren't’ in Safety of Ratiroad Travel. Last year on American railways one pas- senger was killed in accidents out of every 2,827,474 passengers carried. That is to say, that you can take a trajn 2,827,474 times be fore, on the iaw of averages, your turn comes to be killed. You will have to travel 72,003,963 miles on the cars before that turn comes, and 4,541,945 miles before you are injured. If you travel twenty miles every day for 300 days in the year you can keep on at it for 758 years before your turn comes to be hurt. If there had been rail- ways when our Savior was born, and you hed begun to travel on the first day of the year A. D. 3, and had traveled 100 miles in every day of every month of every year since then, you would still have (in this year 18¥8) nearly 3,000,000 miles yet to travel before your turn came to be killed. Ree SEE Jasmine Pipe Stems. In Turkey, the jasmine is extensively grown for the manufacture of pipe stems. For this purpose the stems of the growing plant are trained with the greatest care until they have attained the proper length and size. The bark is protected by a wrap- ping of varnished linen or calico. Two or three times a year this will be taken off and the bark wii) be treated to a citron juice bath. This is said to give it the light color so much sought after. Some of pipe stems are from ten to eighteen feet in jength and bring es much as $100 each. f