Evening Star Newspaper, March 28, 1891, Page 14

14 NUMBER 737. Tt Was a Talker a Few Minutes After Birth. A GRAPHOPHONE CONFESSION Hox = Late Invention Passed Its Time—A Frequent Visitor to “Newspaper Kow”— Unfolding State Secrets—A Love Affair Winds Up Its Useful Career. NLIKE THE GENERAL RUN OF HU- manity I wass talker a few minutes after my birth. Iam now three years oldand at this early age, as I sit around headquarters, it ap- pears to meas if my days of usefulness are et. If this be true I have no one but myself to Elame, a fact the particulars of which I will relate further on. A typewriter who is sitting on me has just remarked that Iam a back num- ber, but as I told him I would knock bim out of alignment {if he spoke again, he has col- lapsed. They called me “737,” and that unique title has clung to me through my brief career, the, history of which I am dictating to my close neighbor, the typewriter, who has promised me that my confession will fall into the bands of “one of those newspaper fellers” connected with Tux Evexrxo Sram. If it does my gratifi- ‘ation will be appeased. A A soon as the finishing touches were given me nt the factory and my lungs tested to ascer- tain whether I was a plain talker they shipped me to Washington, and I've been here ever inca. YINST EXPERIENCE A STARTLER. My first experience was @ startler and very disustrous, and I thought my lease of life would beshort. A newspaper correspondent took me on trial. His office is on what is called “Newspaper Row,” and most of my three years were passed in that locality. sf Being a no atdictation this gentleman sat own in front of me, placed the spesking tu’ to his moath and for fully an hour talked to like a “Dutel uncle.” His verdancy was transparent to me, as he took no pains to look up my adjustment before he began bis dicta- certain if Iwas performing my e during the unfolding of he desired to have transeribed for the benefit of his paper. At the conelusion of bis work he took the wax rolls from my grasp and in great baste sent them to a typewriter to be transcribed, as he desired to catch the 9 o'clock mail. In about an hour's time back came the rolis and with them a dainty note, take it off. You have spoken P I have often wished that Ihad had a roll thin wy grasp at that moment to take down het that newspaper man said. I was never more insulted since my inception. He called me rverything from a blasted humbug to words thas cali for dashes to interpret, slammed me into a corner and the next morning bun- dled me back to headquarters as no good. But it wasn't my fault, and after a thorough ndjust- went I was reported in first-class condition. ‘A CORRESPONDENT WITH A BREATH. Three days later found me again on the “Row.” This timean experienced hand took me ineharge. He was a splendid talker; but, ob, whata breath! He generally spoke to me for half an hour at a stre at the conclusion of his little vet-to I dida't know whether to con- tinue my work or go off aud finish out the drunk n't obje 4 of liquor that gentleman fa: Je was very corrupt srapbophone. “Three months was the li my stay with this dues were While at the rooms of the man with breath I over- heard the wor n d the action of a t include in this confession, as I am satisfied it is worth the space. mage of my custodian and his friends wh» frequented his rooms I 1 that setube, hailing fre city, just out of college, had bat recently rived in Washington. He intended to make pital his hom ues amorg the newspa: al get up avd talk of the was dudish in the extreme, aa initiation general intr »agh the medium of the sed aw poker. The yo a slight knowledge of the game promised to mect the plotters the next evening to pass awas the time. One of the plotters weakered st the thought of robbing the new arrival. and, stopping him in the a ng the plotters flattered themselves upon their Knowledge of the great American game, and although a square deal was intended, their su- perior deftness was supposed to be a handicap wo heavy for the young seribe to overcome. THE DUDE CAME OUT AMEAD. Nothing daunted, the man of fastidious dress Was promptly on hand,and with knowing winks and shrugs from the plotters the game started. ‘The sitting, from star b. me to be made up entire imprecations, three plotters. As one of the plotte: “things weren't coming their wa: Afte yar's pla: me broke up, and sh seribe walked through the room standing ap his way tothe door his “good Samaritan” of the night previous xiously inquired how the game had terminated “Well, Chappie, old boy,” the new scribe re- asted out the door, “not so bad jor a greener. I'm eighty-five ahead. Go see ers in the next room. greeted the new arrival and in is inquiry a wail came from the ‘Cleaned out completely, and by a paper man, too!” During the remainder of my stay in that of- fice I never saw the dude again and I surmised from this that perhaps the game was one of the he had mastered while at college. ou during the following year I visited the “‘Kow” for three or six months ata time, but I was apparently born under an unlucky star, as no one seemed to care for me per- mauiently EXPERIENCE WITH A TYPEWnRITIST. My next and final lessee was a pretty young lady, a typewritistby profession. How pleased I was as she hugged close up to me and placed the daintiest of feet upon my treadle. I fmme- diately fell in love with that pretty miss, and when, at different times, I came across vulgar cuss words uttered by impatient dictators, I gently raised that part of my anatomy called ‘the transmitter for fear of shocking tho sensi- bilities of my fair custodian. The unwise use of this tran-mitter for the purpose of revenge by me led to my downfall and relegation to the company of back numbers. It occurred in this was ‘There was @ certain fine-looking young fel- low, a customer of my lady, wi dictating several aring epithets and sentences would quickly leave the room un- observed. My pretty interpreter, coming i later, would then make me repeat these words and they created such a favorable impression that I became furiously jealous. The young man kept this practice up for some time and wap making great headway upon the girl's af- fections and I determined to put a stop to it. The next day after reaching this conclusion I at my plan in execution. In impassioned Qosee he Spoke these words to me: “Dear No one loves you as well as I do, dearest. iam, you know?” REVENGE ON THE YOUNG MAN. Placing her dainty fect upon me Miss Mazie shortly thereafter started me on my daily grind Of rebashing loving words to her willing ears Tearted in with, “Dear Mazie one loves you,” and here ‘my good right arm, which is called the transmitier. got in its fine work. Here I the transinitter, skipped the words “as | > Tien] doi sod lowered itat the letter “D, ypped to“am” and continued “You now?” lover's mesmage as I mutilated it =p Neone loves you. D— you. You know: With @ little shriek as if in pain Mazie ran mp over the roll again and again, but I was Message came thun- a|G : ly 1o made a| of sitting in front of meand after | wasatanend. Carefully dusting off the loose wax threads that clogged the minute indentures = Ue wax lers, he a and al- thou st inst re- ugh greatly against my 1 plainly poate! lis message in fall as tome. Witha cry of niomanke Miss Mazie to his side and com me to truthfully to her. BE sory came my rival's turn to rejoice as Miss Mazie gave shes given mee Kiss—and all things were serone once again. Miss Mazie never forgave me and soon turned me in to headquarters, and my latest legitimate business rival, the is now receiv- ing Miss Mario's euzeases treading instead of me. —_—_+ee___—_ ITALY TO BE FEARED. She Could Make Us Eat Very Humble Pic If She Chose. F COURSE NO ONE IMAGINES FOR A moment that Italy is going to declare war on account of the killing of those Italian assas- sins in New Orleans, but it is rather amusing to speculate as to the chances this country would have supposing that she took a notion to do 80. A Stan reporter was talking on the subject yes- terday with a captain in the United States navy would lie in the prospect that our part would be taken by Great Britain and France—by the former for the sake of protecting British prop- erty in this country and by the latter because France hates Italy so. It is funny, as well as humiliating, to consider that for safety in an event of the sort we should be obliged to look to the navies of foreign powers. Unaided we should be as helpless against Italy as a mouse in the grasp of a cat. With her fleets she could lay under contribution been op from Port- d to Galveston. Among ships inher navy are four of the finest ironclads in the world—the Duilio, the Dandolo, the Italia and the Lepanto. Anyone of these vessels could float securely nine miles out at sea from New York and, herself in perfect security, re- duce the city to ruins with shot and shell. ‘These ironclads carry 100-ton guns, the largest ever ‘THIS COUNTRY’S RESOURCES. “There is a great deal of talk about the ‘re- sources’ of this country and the celerity with which an army could be raised and organized; but of what avail would half a million men, fully trained and equipped with the most ap- proved weapons, be against a small fleet of Italian ships of war lying off Sandy Hook? Almost simultaneously with the declaration of hostilities the greyhound fronclads of that nation would be on our coast and threatening our ports. What could we do? Nothing. A ileet appears outside the harbor of New York and demands $500,000.00. ‘Pay,’ the com- mander says, ‘or I bombard the city.’ Of course the money would be paid at once; there would be no alternative. All the other seaports conld be levied upon in the same way. Not an effective gun of defense could be tired from she shore, and any cruisers of ours that showed Aight would be quickly blown out of the water. AN ARMY HAS NO CHANCE AGAINST A NAVY. “You must realize that under present con- ditions of warfare an army has no chance against ships. Just for example consider the recent bombardment of Pisagnaon the coast of ._‘The row there is between the president Balmaceda, who has an army with him, an: the citizen people, who do not propose’ that Balmaceda shall run the whole country if they can help it. It hay that the got possession of the navy. and with the ships they Save had the whole coast line in their power. A few days ago two small war vessels of theirs, the Esmeralda and the Blanco Encalada, de- manded the surrender of Pisagua, and when this was refused deliberately destroyed the city with their guns, killing incidentally 2,000 non- combatants, men women and children. Gen. Balmaceda’s army solutely helpless. Take another instance: During the late reb lion on the occasion of the river expedi- tion, the Osage, a small tinclad bringing up the of Admiral Porters feet was, sttacked the shore by a battery anda whole brigade {dismounted cavalry at Pleasant Hill, ‘The Osage steamed up and down in « leisurely way ond totally defeated the army and the battery, ling 409 of the enemy and their commander, reen. “Supposing our ports had been laid under contribution by Italy and the country almost bankrupted in ransom fees, what should we do next? To get back at the successful foe we should have to build a navy. But a navy isnot to be built in a day, with any amount of éxpen- diture. it would take at least ten years for us to create one. Italy has been twenty-five years making hers. ‘That nation ought to find our exposed situation a very attractive temptation. She wants money badly, and in this manner she could get as much as she wanted without much trouble or any danger.” Three Wishes. c rey aretha, First boy—“I wish I had thee wishes.” Second boy—“What would you wish for?” First bov—“All the candy I could eat, all the marbles (?)I want, and—and—and—(with ef- fusion) more candy !” Permitting Prize Fighting. The Nevada legislature has passed a bill per- mitting prize fights in that state and the re- sult will be to make it the paradise of all the toughs in the country. It appears, however, that the legislature was induced to the bill by the fact that in all the 1g camps knock-down and drag-out fight is, the only amusement of the ei was thought best in the interest of order to have these little affairs conducted accor to the rules and regulations lafa down for the government of prize-ring contests. Bought by the Cramps. ‘The ehip-building firm of William Cramp & Sons has ended negotiations for the purchase of the great Port Richmond iron works of the LP. Morris Company. The consideration is said tobe alarge one. By this purchase the Cramps secure one of the largest iron works in the country and adjacent to their own shipyatd. Among iron men the Port Richmond works are famous throughout the United States. ‘They cover about five acres of ground, bounded by Richmond, Bail and York streets and the Dela- ware river, and employ about five hundred —_—__-es____ Strike of Phil Printers. About one-half of the force of non-union compositors employed by the Philadelphia Press walked out of the office last night after their demand that the foreman of the compos- ing room be discharged had been peremptorily refused. Although trouble had been antici- pated for several days past, last night's strik wus a complete surprise to the managers of the .per and they were in a measure unprepared Yorit. “in a short time, however, they had en. gauged a number of men to take the places the strikers, Wisconsin's New Congressional The reapportionment of the congressional districts of Wisconsin has been completed by | the democratic members of the committee and submitted to the full committee. The demo- crats figure that six of the ten districts will be democratic. Two republican wards and the republican towns in Milwaukee county are an- nexed to democratic lake shore counties by the now deal and, it is believed, will make the Mil- waukee district Omaha Gives Parnell the Cold Shoulder, Mr. O'Kelly of the Parnell section arrived st GHOSTS OF THE DEAD. Talk With a Scientist on Post-Mor- tem Apparitions. GRUESOME PHANTASMS. ‘How It is That the Hunting of Ghosts Has Grown to Be a Science—Keal Specters and Hallucinations—What an Actual Phantom is Like—Some Ghost Stories. A™ GHOSTS THE DREAMS OF THE dead? “Before considering that question,” said an expert in psychical science toa writer for Tax Stan, “let us discussthe question as to what a ghost is like. The popular conception of such a phenomenon is familiar enough to be termed conventional. ‘Typically, as represented by tradition and described in popular fic- tion, it is ® corpse-like apparition, which enters by preference at the stroke of midnight, dressed in a winding sheet, smelling of the grave and dragging a clanking chain through the sliding panel just by the bloodstain on the floor. The candles are apt to burn blue incidentally, so as to increase the ghastliness of the effect, and if thero are any dogs about they howl dismally or hide them- selves, fecling their powerlesmess to take a bite out of anything so immaterial and taste- less. “Such is the old-fashioned style of ghost. I will not assort that it isan impossibility, but that such a one was ever in reality beheld has not been demonstrated to the satisfaction of the student of spectral philosophy. On the contrary, the ghost of sober matter-of-fact is recognized by those who have most earnestly pursued this interesting branch of metaphysics as a of a very different character and quality. GENERAL SKEPTICISM. “On the part of the public at large there is a tendency toextreme skepticism respecting post- mortem apparitions. It could not well be otherwise, in view of the fact that very few people have ever been witnesses to such phe- nomena, and the tendency of the human mind is very’ naturally to deny the possibility of that which is aliogether beyond and outside of the range of its own experience. In considering a subject of the sort also, the onl proper scientific attitude is oue of non-belief, except upon adequate, which means entire, demonstration. Obviously, it would be incor- rect to attribute to supernormal causes an; thing for which causes purely normal are abl to satisfactorily account. “The study of post-mortem apparitions is a new branch of metaphysical research. Little more than a beginning has been made in it. However, the impression which has gone to some extent abroad that those who havo begun to investigate the subject are a parcel of cranks is surely nota just one. Some of the foremost men of science in this country and in Europe have interested themselves in. the matter, not by any means for the purpose of proving the ex- istence of ghosts, but in order to find out whether or not such phenomena were possible. The knowledge they have gathered thus far eeoms to point irresistibly to the conclusion that phantasms of the dead do sometimes ap- ar to the living. If this be so how intense an [rch must be felt in the discovery by all mankind, to whom the question as to whether aught of the individual entity survives the body has ever been the most absorbing of all speculative inquiries. THE GHOST OF REALITY. “What does the ghost of reality look like? Naturally you ask that question first, and I will answer it as definitely as I can, though the de- scription is not, so easy. ‘The appearance of such phantoms, so far as all scientifically gath- ered testimony goes to show, is very different from the conception of them formed by imaginative writers of romance. As an almost invariable rule, the _spec- Person, when even, shows fow it does not speak ‘nor use its limbs. It resembles a magic-lnntern picture more than anything lke to which it is readily comparable, ite method of locomotion, when it moves, being a gliding. It is clothed not ma inding sheet, but in garments such as were It appears by day- night, but never y purpose ‘tions t is at all comprehensible. Occasionally it is if-luminous. In most cases it disappears sh a door or wall, but frequently it sim- fades away ina shadowy mist. Sometimes tasmal figure is seen as though illu minated on a dark background. Sometimes it appears asin a disk or oval of light. Some- times its contour is indistinct and it resembies aluminous cloud, and sometimes there is no figure at all, but merely a diffused glow. ‘Because ghoste are rarely seen it is not to be inferred necessarily that they are a rarity. It is reasonable to imagine that the appear- ance of one is occasioned only by conditions of @ very extraordinary nature. Supposing that to be the case, we may be moving in a world of Unseon specters and continually surrounded, whether at home or on our walks abroad, by invisible phantoms of the dead. It has been estimated that for every human being now living 80,000 have died _ on is earth, so that if the spiritual Lodies of all preserve existence here after death, we survivors are but a comparative few ing a brief term of years of what we call ife in the flesh amid a vast impalpabie swarm of beings incorporeal. All that is the merest speculation of course, but I, for one, am dis- posed to believe that, supposing the occurrence of post-mortem apparition to be a thing dem- onstrated, it is to be regarded as an exceptional phenomenon, affording hardly more than an accidental glimpse into supernormal world. & CONDITION NECESSARY TO SEE A GHOST. “One condition necessary to the seeing of a ghost is purely subjective. The percipient must be in acertainstate, psychically speaking, which implies the sensitiveness requisite for seeing that which would be invisible to him un- der oF circumstances. Dr. Elliott Cous speaks of this ax a, change in the threshold consciousness by which what is un- seen at other times becomes perceptible. A. premonition of the apparition is usually given by what is technically called the ‘ghost ebill.’ It is only a very exceptional organism in which the threshold of consciousness is ca- pable of thisshifting. I have o friend, a scholar 4nd aman of science, who often experiences the phenomenon. He comes home every after- noon at about 5 o'clock, more or less tired after his day’s work, and lies down on the sofa in his tudy for a brief rest before din- ner. Occasionally, while enjoying this repose, though ectly wide awake, there comes upon him—go he tells me—the pe- culiar sensation of the ghost chill, and he waits with much attention and interest to see what is going to happen. Presently he fluds his own consciousness projected objectively, as it were, 0 that his conscious elf stands out in the rors and views his body lying on thelounge. About | M: tho latter is a bright light, which grows grad ually until ithas’ filled ail the room, and his conscious self finds itself surrounded by phantasms, most of them of persons who aj pear to be’ strangers to him, while others re- semble acquaintances who have long been dead. They seem to walk about and converse in the ordinary way, though not audibly. All the time my friend is clearly aware of the situation might include which were not the Suvesar Wa dconainy’ dead Wocapetoes; on this would account for the oft-recorded ap: pearances apecters eats an other animals. But, for that matter, there is Inthe grated tat sae ced dege bere met it for ve of their own, aa well as human beings jowever, this is dipping too deeply into ive. 48 TO HALLUCINATIONS. “In considering the subject of phantasms of the dead it is necessary that one should take iate consideration most importantly the ele- ment of hallucination. Before deciding, that any testimony poxsesses value as evidence there must be reason for believing that it doesnot rest upon illusion. The fallibility of the human mind, owing to the imperfection of the senses and of the Judgment behind them, in distin- guishing ihe real from the deceptive ren- jers necessary tho drawing of a line between ‘the two. There is probabl; not one of us who might not be haunted, this very day or ‘a specter pro; his own imagination. Men of great reputation for ve in numerous instances re- corded their observation of familiar phantasms, which, though they recognized them as purely creations of their own brains, have been con- stant companions of their waking hours, always likely to be at band and accepting no hints to depart. “It has been urged that the melancholy and almost idiotic spectacle which #0 many actual apparitions afford—dreamily lacking in appar- ent purpose and exibiting mere blank and fugi- tivo sppeal—serve to repel the student of psy- chical phenomens,which seem tolead upto such a degradation or parody of the hope of eternal life. What men want is the assurance of per- sonal happinees after death. In seeking the consolations of religion they desire to be re- lieved from speculation on the subject and from fear at any cost. But there is an attitude of mind, becoming more widespread yoar by year among educated men, which, thou; either cynical. nor pessimistic, yet rogarda the present without enthusiasm and tho future without eagerness. There is an ac- quiescence in the life of earth, and a dcop istrust of the unknown. With the advance of knowledge, with the quickening of imagination, feeling almost new in the world has arisen— a kind of shrinking from the magnitude of fate. The words infinity and eternity are no longer mere countersfor the use of theologians. They have taken on an awful significance from our growing realization of the immensity of being. A soul from which the Christian confi- dence is withdrawn may well foel that it is going forth into a void,« spark of sontiency fivofved amid enormous forese. and capable of unimagined pain. Yet would there not be something cowardly in refusal to accept the only definite facts attainable because they aro not the kind of facts which we should best have liked to know? And would there not be some- thing childish in the notion that the unseen world must consist of vague and ghastly ob- jecte? “ Mockeries and asks of motion and mute breath, Leavings of life. tue supertiux of death STORIES WHICH POSSESS VALUE AS EVIDEN( “The societies for psychical rosearch in this country and abroad have gathered together a great numbor of stories of apparitions which seem to pussess value as evidence. I will men- tion one or two of them wherein the same ghosts were seen by more than one individual, 80 as to establish a confirmation of the facts which would seem to preclude the possibility either of cheat or of hallucination. For exanple, a Mrs. Stone of Bridge- port, England, writes: In the summer of 1880° my cousin Emily was staying with me, and my friend Mary Jenkins was spending the day with us. We drove over one afternoon in July to my uncle's vicarage at Sydling in a lit- tle four-wheeled carriage. They were all at home, delighted to see us, and we spent a most charming evening. We left early euough to reach home before dark. A most beautiful evening it was, and three more merry girls could hardly be met with Just atter ing Wrackleford the road is rather elevated. It had been somewhat dusky before, but here the evening glow showed the hedges, road and all near objects. There it was that I saw the figure of aman on the right-hand fe, walking, or rather gliding, at the head of horse. My first idea was that he meant to stop us, but he made noattemptof the kind, sim- ply keeping on at the same pace with the horse, neither faster nor slower. At first I thought him of great height, but'afterward remarked that he was gliding’ along at least afoot above the ground. Mary was sitting by me; I pointed out ‘the figure, but she did not see it. Emily was sitting by the man servant on the front seat. She heard what I said, turned around and said softly: ‘I see the man you mention distinctly.’ ‘Then the man servant said ina frightened yoice: ‘For God's sake, ladies, don't say anything! It'sa ghost!’ We Were silent and the shape kept on for some dis- tance until at the entrance of the village of Charminster it vanished and we saw is no more. A WOMAN WITH HER THROAT cUT. “Under date of May 15, 1883, Mrs. G., land- lady of a London lodging house, writes: ‘On @ Tuesday night, about the end of November of last year, I woke up with a feeling that some one was in the room. I had my face away from the wall, but I turned around and saw between the bed'and the wall the figure of a woman about fifty yeurs of age, with dark hair and eyes, a red dress anda mob cap. I looked at her and asked her what she wanted. She bent her head slowly back and I saw what I thought at first was @ very wide mouth. Then I saw that it was not a mouth at all, but that her throat was cut from ear tocar. Iwas very frightened and I called out to her in the name of ‘the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost to go away. She did not stir, however, and I re- mained looking at her by the light of the two candles in the room until I heard a knocking at tay door and the figure slowly vanishod like « shadow.’ The knocking was done by two male lodgers in the next room, who hud been dis- turbed shortly before by beholding precisely the same apparition, as they testitied on oath. 4 RED-HEADED MAN WITH A COFFIN. “Dr. A. Beith, » minister of the Free Church of Scotland, makes affidavit that in August, 1885, he was the guest for the night in the house of Mr. Lillingston of Lochalsh, Ross-shire. He was given a large bedroom on the top floor, his host and hostess sleeping on the ground floor, so that a whole story intervened between his quarters and theirs. In his account of what happened, he says: ‘I had gone to bed. After alittle I fell ttlcep and I slept I do not know how long. Suddenly I was awakened by what I ed was a loud knock at my door. The fire in the big fireplace Was still burning, so that I could see very well. I called, “Come in!” then I saw the doce slowly open, and » man of gigantic stat- ure, red haired and with brawny arms bared high above the elbows appeared. He ad- vanced not toward me, but direct to the fe upon his massive frame. He carried a largo black chest, which appeared to me to be studded with brass nails and so heavy as to tax his strength to the utmost. Ashe came within better view the black chest seemed to grow intoa huge coffin and then my bed curtain concealed from my eyes the bearer and his burden. Iheard him set it down with a start- ling crash which appeared to shake the house. I jumped up in bed and looked around, but the vision was gone. I was just trying to com] myeelf and to make up my mind it it had all been @ nightmare, when the door opened and, Lillingston came in witha light. He said that he and his wife—two floors below, mind you—had been disturbed by hearing the fall of something heavy overhead. Just one year after four children in the family died within a few weeks. FUNERAL EXPENSES. The Enormous Cost of Burying a Congresaman Nowadays. JOYOUS JUNKETING TRIPS. Luxurious Memorial Volumes With Steel En- gravings—Five ThousandGoveramentClerks Rejoice— Will the Abuse Continue?—Inter- views With Prominent Congressmen. ‘Written for The Evening Star. 18 PREDICTED THAT THE NEXT CON- gress will be an economical Congress. It will keep an eye to the saving of money. At- tention was foreibly called to the one item of official funerals by Hon. Mr. Cates of Alabama in one of the last speeches of the last session. He denounced the habit of sending committees of honor to accompany the remains of doceased Senators and Representatives to their place of interment, and then he said: “These committees, instead of being genuine mourners, usually take pleasure excursions or jankets at the expense of the public treasury. I never have served on one of these, but I note among the expenditures one faneral which cost $52,000 and another which reached near $80,- 000. It matters not how obscure or inconse- quential a member may be, if he dies in official harness, the same expensive program is adopted and the same formula observed of burying him and then of pronouncing eulogies upon him and of printing these fulsome effusions in n volume, with a steel engraving frontispiece, and at an average cost to the people who never heard of bit of 20,000 for the votames Ho was immediately pounced on by corre: gpondents on tho nowspapers, who declarod at the expenses were not a tenth part of the sums alleged, and gave recent disbursements as follows: For Senator Beck—Undertaker, $738.50; gen- eral expenses,including Pullman cars, 61,795.73 transportation, $1,553.25; carriages, €191; mis- cellaneous, $210. ‘Total, 84,428.47. For Senator Miller—General expenses, in- cluding hotel bill at San’ Francisco, $1,284. carriage hire, €119; transportation, including it goes, but it includes only one kind of ex Penset—those attendant on barial—whereas Col. tes meant to include at least four kinds, for instance: For Senator Miller—Expenses of transporta- tion and burial, $7,880.74: expenses of volume $f culogies, $20,000; expenses of Congross ad journed one day. €20.000; expenses of money Voted to widow, $5,000; total, $52,930.74. ‘This makes the funeral cost $53,000, the sum first named by Col. Oates. The $80,000 funeral was probably of some more expensive remains. Moreover, the undertaker, who made his way into Senator Beck's bill, accidentally escaped from Senator Miller's, but there is every reason to believe that he got into the treasury. Congress is not only in the habit of giving $5,000 as a gratuity to the widows of all mem- bers who die in service, but of making a corre- sponding present to the widows, and even other relatives, of all clerks of Congress who die in service, "On April 25, 1888, the Senate gave $1,296 to Mary A. R. Quimby, sister of the en- roiling clerk, ‘and when F. H. Saulsbury, an- ther clerk, died, $1,095 was given to his folks, ‘said sum to be considered as including fane expenses and other allowances.” And so on for dozens of other clerks. The annual report of the secretary of Senate for 1887 contains the following items: For goods furnished for the funeral of Sen- ator John A. Logan, deceased, viz: 1886—De- cember 29.—1,948% ‘yards calico at 73<c., $146.15; 875 yards cloth at 8734 71; 2 grove pins, $2.48; 12 pieces tape at Ibe. €3: 15 yards wool fringe at 35c., $5.25: 28 yards silver raid at 20c., $5.60; 24 yards crape at $1.75, $42; 30 silk sashes at $7, $210; 10 pieces hat crape, $10; 8 dozon whito silk’ gloves at #12, $35: 134 dozen white silk glov dozen cotton gloves at $3, © crape, €5;18 yards crape at folding chairs, 260. Total, 9614.34. It would be interesting to know what became of the thirty silk sashes at $7 apiece. But if this be only a small part of the funeral expenses of Gen. Logan, whose services to the count are not likely to be overestimated or overpatd, what shall be said when thousands on thou- sands of dollars are paid out for obscure mem- bers whose names are scarcely known beyond their own counties? 1a Here is another bil On red ing. 960; hearse, $8; 7 suit of elothes, $48; patent leather shoes, #4. Total, 15. The government paid $630 for the coffin of Hon. W. D. Kelley and $100 for his grave. The burial of Hon. 8.8. Cox cost the government ‘$823.60, besides the principal items—transpor- tation and other expenses of committee. One item of expense for Senator Beck's funeral isas follows: Personal expenses of com- mittee to Lexington, Ky., of which $1,000 was for food, $1,795.72. I find on inquiry at the government printing office that the volumes of eulogies cost all the way from 4,000 for an ordinary member to $14,000 for @ distinguished man like Logan. This is exclusive of wrapping, addressing and Postage, in the aggregnte cod pore, and the steel engravings, costing #500 to 81, each. One hundred copies of each book con- stitute an edition de luxe for the window, in morocco and gold. WHAT SENATOR DOLPH THIXES, “I am not hurrying,” said Senator Dolph, caressing his long gray whiskers with his hand. It is still very comfortable in Washington.” ing down F street, but he paused for me to ask him some ques- Jong enough Scion fa aevocet etng enter ’s “Tam in favor jan< for all the faneral orations. ‘The dayis especially adapted to that Only one objection ocours to me: Fi talk s good. deal and make's big book of eulogios. “hut even that would be better than spending precious time that is be. ing paid for by the people at the rate of one or two thousand dollars an hour. And these spe lal trains of palace cars across the continent, carrying a lot of poople—some of whom do not know the deceased and few of whom care for him—Thave no doubt they will terminate with the Congress that has just expired. It is the last thing those dead mon would want if they could speak—a parade over their dead turning, more or less, into what the Samanthy Allen called “a pleasure exertion’ “Do you, think we are entering on an era of frugality, Senator! “Yes: that is, I think the proprieties of case will be consulted, and money be spent where it is needed. ’ Other things besides funerals will be cut next year, too. The knife will be put into these departments and excres- cences will be nepres: off. Worthless clerks will be woeded out—there are a good many of them, and they can be found and identiied. It is a work that greatly needs doing. ‘MAJ. WRINLEY PREDICTS REFORM. Tcalled on Mr. McKinley and found him up to his neck in documents, letters and garden seeds, tryii his way out, and he was uit cordial as he wns before that uncomfortable November from HATS, BONNETS AND MILLINERY NOVELTIES | FOR SPRING WEAR. | wi facing manfully the realities and duties of life. an encouragement, a stimulus and » Tazning to the living even more than an hon “But this junketing to attend « distant faneral is to be deplored—and to be se attending it is a aul not solemn, and it is not beneficial in ite effect even on the mem- Lers who attend the funeral. There is only ‘one obvious way to keep down at once the cort Let the House and yputise a sergeant-at-arms to at- ‘a8 its official representative and let him large number of people earst’s funeral, and of course 'y object is not to pay honor to the nator by a good deal.” Mr. Holman’ was addressing thousands of of seeds to farmers with his own d, not being able to have it done, and I thoughtfully shortened my interview in order e to start his mitrailleuse and fire beneficent volleys of beans, peas, muperior Extabags turnips A.C to give him a chance to this bucolic post cece Res NEW YORK NOTES, The Effect of the Epidemic Grip in the Me- INACTIVITY OF THE EASTER TRADE—BROADWAY AXD ITS TORN UP CONDITION—A YOUNG MILLION- AIRE AND HIS PROFLIGACI—THE CIGARETTE Special Correspondence of The Evening Star. New Yorx, March 26, 1891. PLEASANT TALE OF NEWSPAPER life is to the effect that a managing editor sent a note to the paragrapher directing bim tosupply afew choice jests on the grip, to which the answer came from the funny man, “I can't, I've got it” For this same reason Tam ina mood to treat this new tramp-<dis- temper very seriously. It is indeed a serious thing, and the young lady who hanged _ herself on account of it the other day out west arouses the same sort of admiration among her less spunky fellow-sufferers that the bold bad traveler who just missed the train excited in a lady traveler in the same plight, but less courageous in the use of swear words. The lady who hanged expresses our sentiments and gains our thanks, though we haven't the nerve to follow her example. ‘The one infallible penaces for seasickness is “the shade of a tree.” the awful trath that one may now be seasick on land, for that,as near as my experience goes, is what the new ailment means. And dent individual who hasn't ever let loose his desires for travel because of a horror of seasickness sll at once finding him- 6 | self utterly nauseated, blind with headache, te willing to go to with no real wish for to turn over and die. have officially declared Tue Lrsviso Ixsrnvments DECKER BROS." PIANOS. WEBER PIANOS. FISCHER PIANOS. ESTEY PIANOS. ESTEY ORGANS. RENTED AND SOLD ON INSTALLMENTS. TUNING AND REPAIRING. SANDERS & STAYMAX, mhé-3m 13 N. CHARLES S8T., BALTIMORE. ALLET & DAVIS’ Positive, ia But the grip reveals =3 oes; Bm: ‘Erize Medal Paris Exposition. 200 first peemtums. ‘ever 100 music schou'ls end Cul pane. Theou.y 7 Qurability. Upright thet can r FFE! g and burning, qui wit his boots on an anything except simply The board af health the disease epidemic, but few need tho authori- tative announcement, as the thinned ranks of church, shop and theater crowds tell the story with striking force. More than one-half of the editorial staff of my own paper are hors de combat, and the rest are nervously waiting their However, it might be worse; it isn’t thecholera. Iremember. speaking of get- ting bit, how, once in cholera year in the east, the invisible bolts used to fly like the veritable arrows of death. I recall one strong, weil-look- ing woman who suddenly sprang right up in the air with a scream, like a wounded fawn,and fell back on the floor in a fatal collay COME TO USER. The parable’ of the prodigal son has a local setting in the career of @ young man who landed here on Tuesday. Six years ago, when he was seventeen years of age, this youth in- herited a fortune from his parents of €2,000,- 000. He succeeded in runnin thoroughly that he has come to without a cent of moncy for bread and with bi says he would not re- t an offer of a place as dishwasher in a Testaurant. For a time his money went very ta yacht, followed the races spec in cotton.” He is now a home- less vagrant and pauper, and is likely to re- main so. He hasn't even a father to welcome him back and provide the reconciling veal. THE WORM TURNS. You doubtless remember the strong delega- tion that went on to Washington last winter, resenting the various lines of trade in this tothe McKinley bill. ir demonstration was mad this week at Albany against a bill which proposes to tax the stock of the business man hether he owns it or not and which demands f his account books, together with other inquisitorial and oppressive features. mercantile communit; much aroused on this subj CH, WORKMANSHIP Special Y ‘sinvited to their Peano a wean ut EST DECORATIVE AR BICYCLES. q \ Savers For Saat. Cycusrs. frame, tinned rubber-tired wheels frame, enameled all overs. Juniors, plam bearinzs, : bearin and Gals local aul GORMULLY & JEFFERY MFG. Co., fast. He bou Litto 14th <. L. B. GRAVES, Manager. ‘HE Wwol COLUMBIA SAFETY BICYCLE It iea beauty and puts all others to sleep. GEO. 8. ATWATERECO., 1424-26 Penn. avo. POTOMAC RIVER BOATS. A somewhat simi has become very ject, and. Tuesday & ion went up to Albany ina ade a vigorous protest in the committee rooms there. dead, but there is some very vigorous stampin; on the grave, and probably the soil is batten down so hard thet the rection. ‘The New York laws are hard enough i may be seen by the fre- h corporations emi Offered an asylum against erer. will now be no resur- AGAIN THE SPADE ON BROADWAY. It reminds one of the | ¥ ot slough of despond, into which millions of loads | Completion of the | of good intentions were dum; Poor Broadway! ped, but which | tue seamer Geo. was incorrigibly in need of new repaire, id in spite of the most determined labore never gut any better. It was only a few months ago that the whole strect was, turned uj tion of business and literally ions of dollars to the business of the city, but now up comethe stones again, not in the shape of a riot, though a mob. might pa epee oer s of improvemen Toad! ruined this time and Norfolk at 4:30 p.20.. JOHN CALLAHAN, WM. E. CLARK, President. ven AND OLD POINT. —STEA\ ‘with electricity, imeludinz . War, and Sunday, 5p. 5 trip, 83. “Teiwpbone cali 1-50. “WAKEFIELD” on MONDAYS, THURSDAYS am etwas TUES sand te RAILROADS. ICHMOND AND DANVILLE RAILROAD 00. R* ae efiect MAKCH Ss. lst. ena Resareens Ee emer 20. ato a 118 p.ap.—Southern E daily for Lynehbar: Danville, " Cease ee. Aucusta: Atte, Athan New rican, Shan au Caliente Westie car Waabtn®: shineton to Ange- ‘vision eave Wash 63S pm. dally ang go ig ape. Waahic Bp. Ny ade ae trains from the south via Charlotte, Dam. ue) = ‘rive ia Washinevon kta Ma haot Tenpeses, Briss Pom. jovani at loa? ran Nestibule Sleeper for Pullman Care are pen we Bp.m. Tous and ore, mt atid Cleveland, express aud 80 pea onetoenid Jxuuutot atid points in the Shenandoah Valley, hegter and Way Stations, 15/30 p.m. y. S20 porn. . week a mane am., 12:10 end4-23 as TID wa, is, 1399, Me “Yor Hagerstown, 110.40. ROYAL BLUE NEW YORK aND -PHIA. ‘and Cheater, 74.95 MAM, OS awd oping ot Wining a Por tue ofall ticket Acents, TExcept Sunday. “Daily. tSunda: parware called tor aa checked Scences Ly Union offices, 79 ond 1:bl Pa. J"! ODEL jez i ‘ont Letels anaroy £00, ore lett at cokes i. ad the Depst, ia Tia, Sa. yur ones FANTA ROUTE, TO THE T AND SOUTRWEst. DOUBLE »LD SCENERY STEEL L, MAGNIFICENT EQUIPMENT = in Trey r § PROM STATION © HPS AS FOLLOWS. Aor Pittsburg aid the west, Cutougo Limited Exprese of Pusan Vestily 1000 a Ciicace. and Bt. Louie ist Prva ‘and Chics tally fur Patinbane and tive Ti ronda sleeper te Fittaburs, nud lt LTIMOKL AND POTOMAC RAILROAD, ane, Canandaiena, Re and Niagara? =, 10-00 Pa agra With, leering Cat Lentor. Wainsport. Kenovo and Kluire #12050 um daily eacept Sunday For Williainsport daily FORPH 20, 3-00. ONLY. Fast Express 8:10.10. days and 4.m. Aane Fxpress, Sunday only, a, nay 3 City With Doats of Brookiyn Auues, aflor Me ire: to Faiton ‘st... avoiding ity. yoek day's, 11.35 p.10. 00, 4, gs, 10d RAILWAY. 11. ROUTE TO LONDO? NOKDDEUTSOH: Fast B ci sarouu, April 10, ! ward a berti roceamre at rates, ADD Fr a a (4 i ee iow 0 e DROUI emu ave. ory MOOS iin TORK, QUEENSTOWR aND MER LAKE FROM NEW YORK EVERY WEDNESDAY. passace PETER WRIGHT & SONS, Gen. Agents, tub3-eoSm, fied Washing tom ED STAR LINE. MBeigian Koval sd United States Mat Steamers di- NEW YORK i PHILADELPHIA ANTWERP. ani WeRP. ‘One Orto and careful menial note of whatever he observes, until after few brief moments the spectacle vanishes and he finds himself on the ——. He insists that he is never asleep on occasions or even ‘THERE ARE POST-MORTEM APPARITIONS. “People say there are no such things as ghosts. Meteorites—those other invaders from the unseen—were until lately quite as scorn- fully rejected; and, naturally, 80 long as the evidence for paenSusena 50° funrvelogs rested only upon tradition and the tales of peasants. hich ine spesteal Inquty ie onal = wi now. hen inquiring men ‘who had sctually spoken with the — peasants aan seen the stones believed that the latter had fallen. Then all at once the fall of formal and with the as dusth wen abt were very busy, paused for an hour Cutcheon Sars noo death was to be ssid was said on the spot and at moment." This eg mete hens cepa Raneatiens of the the distinguitned OF FOREIGN COATINGR, ‘TINGS, OVERCOATINGS AND TROUS- ERINGS RECEIVED. GENTLEMEN WHO CLASS TAILORING ARE IN- ALL GARMENTS CUT PA. AVE., AKE GUAR- ANTEED 40 Be Us due Gumiecs STYLE. ie ADMIRE FIEST- VITED TO INSPECT. BY. D. BARK, 1111 fy t FAMILY SUPPLIES. a if Hi ef i I F E i i PakinatD LONDON. Belgium, Holland, France, Switzerland, the Rhine erage ut low cabin, second cain, Saerae daredare ss: “General Se green. ew 3 ow . w. rpRoricaL TOUR. 9150 can her GREAT EXuI. ‘eatending their trip, ot the va ae SPECIALTIES. SEREREC ESS co ee free. 1 to 2, Oto 7 pan. 2S. See. £65 Se. eee Ta ee