The evening world. Newspaper, December 29, 1922, Page 24

epee tene ee Mena r nen erat Copyright, 1922 (New York fventng World), FRIDAY, DECEMBER 29, 1922 The Evening World Comics | When Rip J piancue, MM ALL TY" Years we've. ps) BEEN MARRIED “WiEY'S BEEN ONLY ONE THING COME BETWEEN US mar LUSTRE OF OUR HAPPINESS! gS) WELL, WE WOULD Be You DIDN'T ALWAYS WANT (T ust WHEN EE waNT ITH | HERE. Y'Go =!--! TS YOU ALWAYS WANTS IT | JUS WHEN ZT WANT (TH, PL AT'S THE ONLY “THING We ‘\ EVER BATTLE OVER — \T SHouLpN'T BE = We OUGHTA. BE. HAPPY * Copyright, 1922 (New York Mvening World), Fress Publishing Company. NTRODUCING a sidewalk scene in Limbo where Robinson Crusoe and Rip Van Winkle meet. Their shades come together and do some verbal shadow boxing which we Press Publishing Company. TO THE ELKS. READER who declines to give his full name read in this A newspaper Tuesday of the Christmas party given by Lodge No. that ea bouncing baby girl has come 1, Blks, for the poor children. rhyme was tho result: fame. | have written of the gal- lant cop in blue, | have told in verse of others who to glory The story inspired him, and the following herewith produce verbatim through the courtesy of Station AWOL, ROB-—I don't want to knock any- body, Rip, but this guy Friday was overrated. The first week he worked fine, Dusted the house every other day, made the beds, got the meals on @ olaim, thing that rhymester { to do. But to- | time—tin fact he did everything just day | want to write of just one jabout perfect. But didja ever eee a othe I know. He's no hero —not a man of special note. He's the man who's on the square all the time and everywhere, He's the fellow with the antlere on his coat. You can trust him with your *“ loved ones, you can the Bible he can quote. living life the the fellow with man who knows pleasant word—a OBSERVATIONS. George Num Lee says he wouldn't marty Mildred Wen now, even if he ‘ould catch her. And who, we'd like to ask, {s this actor Lowell Shepman the theatrical “ads” speak of? Guns and booze are -banned for Cleveland's New Year's Eve. Poor Cleveland!) No murders and no drunks! Homer Croy, humorist, announces to his house to stay. We should be “delighted to drink to her health at apy time Just so long as Lords and other “titled gentry are inflicted on’ Ireland the Free State will have trouble. The spirit of true democracy docsn't lie in titles. A Lip Reader’s Love. Tho’ deaf and dumb, he read from lips, One day he sought to wed Mae Phipps, She answered: “Dear, you've won general maid that wasn’t a knockout the first week, anyway? RIP—Well, no, I can't my as 1 ever did, ROB—Listen, Rip. This guy Fri- day was ike all the rest. First thing I noticed, a little rye was missing. 1 didn’t say a word, but just watched. sure enough, Friday was snitching a swag after every meal. RIP—Nol ROB—I'm tellin’ you he was! Well, I let that go by. With help scarce and one as bad as the next, I didn’t feel ike givin’ him his notice. But I'm tellin’ you thie because I get so sick of hearin’ folks talk about my wonderful servant. RIP—Sure, I understand just how it 1s, Now I myself— BOB—Pretty soon he gets throwin’ too much garbage away. I didn’t holler at that, either, but dropped a few strong hints. Then one night my spare pair of pants was missin’. And just like I thought, the big bum had gone and borrowed ‘em to attend some swell cannibal dance. RIP—Can’t ‘get ahead of ‘em no- how, can yer? ROB—Well, I stopped that pants racket pretty quick. 1 put both pairs on every day and wore ’em both to bed. He didn't say a word, but he knew I was on to him. Then what next does he do! Well, I laid ih a stock of tooth paste. You know— them tubes that roll out flat on the brush, RIP—Well, I've seen the ads. on billboards in the Adirondacks. ROB—Two days later six tubes was flatter than a flapjack. And I got his finger prints on every, one! RIP—No! ROB—It's a fact. usin’ ‘em to make peppermint milk- shakes. Then things got goin’ from bad to terrible. He neglected the par- rot. Then he started takin’ violin lessons. And finally he comes to me and wants EVERY Thursday and Sunday off. I was just vo the point of writin’ him a nice recommendation The sucker wa: Un BUT Mon ante NoT LET HER Wave ir Tine SH EARNED THE Mon: BY. so STORE MAN WOULD NT TAKE THE DOG BACK HAD TO LET HIM Go FREE — Ri THE Poor Doe AS BEEN out . ann NIGAT — Cope. 1802 (N.Y, Eve, Word) Pram I NEED ANcTHER Crea Here -ouT £ CANT AFFORD TD PAY MUCH —A SYOUNG: UNMARRIED MAN NTO START AT Sit Borrom 15 WOT CLE EZRA, CHT A Foe May THE Doe UNCLE EZRA Bl © is FRITZI RITZ ae LITTLE MARY MIXUP N Hat & RIGHT? T Day MY Good MonBY : Doe AND You WONT LET Mary HAVE “IT — THE DoS ‘Le Go BACK AND THAT CROOK ‘LL. HAVE THE Doc AND MY Money Too. 6 - FoR © je) © ‘B6-T HAVE An’ OFENIN’ FoR SY MIGHT Fewer } T dont CARE & By DISCIPLINE A DisciPii Ne, AND BR MARY CANT AVE > & DOG TLL SHE f) GARNS IT - wi- SHOOT= WAS 4 Good Doe AND AIS AME WAS Doro / Cae iS 52 A~Senewerters =” The Rest May Do Him Good! READERS DisacREE! LET MARY AAME A SPOS = Joan cared E poked eon. S Weev chad shoved EAeN Money Downe SMALL TASHS - LOT BARN AND SAVE AND - WHed SHE GETS 4 WIRING Disnes.ere «72d and firtn’ him, when Defoe fomes 1 00D -FOR-NOTHING “TED NICHOLS HERE o, YOU ANYTHING ELSE THATS W MONA the day,” along and says/not to be hasty—that a eon BAD ENOUGH Yo HAVE HIM HERE uae wer SIT AROUND HERE You WERE WORKING! ALL NATION FROM ‘ 4nd then he kissed her words away. | we're only goin’ to last a few chapters EVERY NIGHT NOW HE HANGS AROUND IN THE AN! TALK “To FRITZI ALL DAY? YOUVE BEEN DONG FoR f rare . more anyway, But it gives me dys- - CT + : TELEPHONE LOVE. pepsia the way they all think Friday (What Has Gone Before—Mary Dingk id ber Chinese maid, Abba Dabba, are was something grand os a servant, RIP—Hell, I had about the same experience myself. You wee, Rob, pedest aan i ee when I comes back from my twenty pinged {nthe years’ sleep, all the folks says, ‘Well, many Cirtetm: ladies! Now “Yes,” sdi¢ Hector, the con- ductor, “somebody has shot me.” Mary took off her shirt and tore it to ribbons. She bandaged his arm and then called up the Chief of Police. “Chief,” she said, “I fear there are assassin. out here in the woods,” “Why, Mary Dingle!” The Chief had recognized her voice. This, of course, indicates she must have got the right num- Rip, quite a few improveme: ner you left the old town twenty years ago—hey?” ROB-—Yes, I s’pose they did. RIP-—Well, that improvement stuff goes for Sweeney, They had a few chain grocery stores where old Charley Hinkle used to give credit, and a bunch of powerful strong arc lights on Main Street where they cut down all the elms, But the same old of leadin’ citizens was still fore. ’ here low ame bunch of choir I hollerin’ agin rum nd the same crowd of society 3 still pullin’ off tag days for es or food kitchens in the } K ATINKA ber. Mary smiled, “How's your family?” asked in a girlish manner. “Oh, forget mamma and the kids!" said the Chief. “Meet me down by the lamp post at 9 T Suet WANNA READ ABOUT THIS WAGE SCALE THE GOVERNMENT 1S GONNA PASS To PRovecT THE WoRKING st, I forget which. No change at all, bey? RIP—Hell, Rob, I'm tellin’ yer, if anything, "twas worse. It all goes to prove your and my contention that these writin’ guys like Washington Irving and Defoe don't —————., | WELL OF ALL THE CHEAP (tere SIT | (SKATES 3 TMINK YOU'RE THE TM GLAD NONE OF MY FRIENDS ARE IN THis TRAIN ‘To see Me WITH A FELLOW WHo READS OTHER PICKING UP A NEWSPAPER THAT =| SOMEONE ELSE LEFT ON HIS SEAT 1S MY IDEA OF A LOW BROW she i Here! / ZCHEAPEST ft 5" P H P.M." tell the half of it. Ur less than that, { Abba Dabba knew the penchant oes Secon of ber mistress for lamp posts proceeded, with Mary walking and began to argue against the arm in arm with the waiter. plan “Tootle, tootie!” Au engine “Miss Lingle,” she said, “never monkey with a Chief of Police, Have you beard that the Smiths were planning to take a monkey to Albany?” “Aw, shut up, or I'll bat you one!” said Mary. A long period of sitence fol- was coming. (To Be Continued.) THIS AND THAT. A friend of ours just dropped in. Taking a chair next to us, be said: “A pint in need is a pint indeed.” ‘Then arising, be sat dows in our lowed. Then Hector spoke up, lap and said: “Write that up, Dud.” “Now, I'd suggest,” he said, He was right. A pint in need ts a “that we proceed. loubtedly | pint indeed, but he discouraged us a Charley Blocd of the Kansas City Star is walting at the station to greet us, and bere we are argu- ing about a Chief of Police.” said little when he collapsed on us, How- ever, be reminded us of Christmas Day, when we started for Bronxville in an auto, The man at the wheel New York. 4 professional pianist, an acquata-| “I've been playing the plano two| softly from 3 to 5 P. M. daily, just/ lie.’ I did, and when It was over, my|{n It I ever get the AND NOW PERMIT US “Righto!” the society had a pint, and we landed in White}tance of ours who isn't very pros-|bhours a day outside the room of ajto soothe him, Yesterday, however,| Job was Snished. The man was dead.| chance I'm going to play “Walt Till To state that Jefferson Shrews- lady, “I bave many relatives on | piains. perous, stopped us on Broadway|sick man uptown,” he said. And|the jab gave out. “He was an old bachelor,” con-|the Sun Shines, Nellie,’ to her, and bury Nutt 1 nov related tie ieee Park Avenue who will be Afid we spent balf the day try!ng | yesterday these ars the facts: “At five minutes to 5,” be sald, “the|cluded the pianist, “and years ago] see how it affects her. He died with bk bs ies coun aa ) pleased.” to discover why the p’ Sywere}] “I've just finished a good job,” be} The sick man loved popular muste.| doctor came to me and asked me to/he used to sing that song to her {it to-day, but they ten me he smiled bi ba 8 solipee iit ugh That sottled i. The party | called white. f Imaid, We'asked whatthe job was. |The plauist played popular eirs 1” ‘Wait Till the Sun Shines, Nel-| ‘They told me her name and she ead when the finish came.’ j Nutt's mothor was a Korn, , pe A “ é ’