The evening world. Newspaper, November 11, 1922, Page 15

Taper ee Enforcement of the V stead Act on Shipping Board Steamers Is a Problem for P hilo- sophic Discussion. gpBmergencies Like Storms at Sea Offer Obstacles That Will Not Be Easily Sur- mounted. By Montague Glass. e¢] SEE where the Atiantic Ocean went dry yesterday, Mawruss,” Abe Potash re- marked to his partner, Morris Perlmutter, the day after Attor- ney General Daugherty handed down his opinion about the sale liquor at sea “And 1 bet yer that already Abe, the bootleggers is arranging to make prompt deliveries by tast motor boat to all Atlantic Ocean points, Abe.” Morris observed “Well, it’s bound to raise the price of bootleg liquor anyhow Mawruss, on account of the d mand ym booze fighters who will want to get together a stock of liquor against possible future Ocean voyages, even though they atn’t got in prospect for the next ten years so much as a trip to Staten Island on a municipal ferry aid it feature of it Maw ‘THE EVENING : WORLD'S AA UOLUMLMLLTUDLLILTLALT LL LEME TES MLE, CHAPTER XXXII. HIS is a foggy country, Mr Jb Pirate,"* remarked Jamie, “and @ foggy sea to set sail even in the Gogd Ship Makebelieve.” “It is indeed, my son," the Pirate agree d Tam the one that's glad fo hear you say that. You'll be a sailor la te My 4 t see the use of travelling Rurtlie north at this 28 of ar, eald Alice, wh had been readin ner Beography and natural history “When t seals and the terns and the plove South, tt'a no time for us t “Hear the talk,"’ ex ed the | te Vhat does the little girl know about terns and plovers and we “ \ w thut they all leave the Arctic ( { this time of year und Ro toa ner p! with better food than » We have hardly bi cults « n the seachest and apples int 4 to last u ne.!? “Hon the Pir cuught the word 4 want to go home?" he lo tut them searching!s Jam," hung his head but Alice spoke a) t would be nice to go home and change our clothes “foreign ship at the foot of 42d Stree lyn Rapid Transit.” citizenship papers.” “Just when people are beginning to realize ho w they Hid bats fore didn’t want to buy ft no more, along comes this opinion of 1. fresh talking point in their sales campaign.” running at 12 midnight Saturday and not start op again till 12.01 A. M. Monday morning.” from sinking, I also don’t see how the Captain !s going to get three hands with an extra round of vantlla ice cream so das.” “Tr the ship gets into a gale off Newfoundland, we would’ say, for example, th to each member of the crew a prescription under the Volstead act.” russ, I don't think tt will have much New York City, It would have’ to take “Now the Atlantic Ocean Has Gone Dry T will cause American steamers to lose to foreign steamers the trade of a whole lot of people who, if trips to Eyrops cost one dollar and twenty-fiye cents, including berth and meals, couldn't get no nearer Liverpovol, England, than one tive-cent fare zone on the Brighton Beach Line of the Brool- “I always thonght a foreign ship, even when It was in an American port, was still so foreign that if a child was born on a foreign ship at the foot of 42d Street, New York (ity, It would have to take out liquor they wanted, and there- iougherty and gives bootleggers a “The outlook Is that in the next five years or so American Shipping Board steamers would got to stop “If a bunch of saflors has heen working nicht and day during n big Atlantic storm to save the steamer cheers from the crew ff he serves all plate contd hand tains to have as high grade a sense the moment she leaves the dock unttl she tles up in Kurope that the only inducement a foreign steamship com- pany could offer me to begin my Jour. ney at Monteal would be In case the United States Government prohibited steamers from carrying aspirin." “Well, give the cranks of this coun- try a chance and the Government will yet do that, Abe,’ Morrie sald. “There's still a 50-50 probability that the anti-cigaret Jaws in effect in some States will be made the next amendment to the United States Con- stitution, along with Sunday closing, Abe, and the outlook ts that in the next five years or so American Ship ping Board steamers would got to stop running at 12 midnight Saturday and not start up again till 12.01 A. M. Monday morning.” YO, HO, HO, AND AN ICE CREAM SODA. “Well, I suppose Congressmen from -Kaneas and Utah will figure that a sailor should ought to have one day off a week, the sane like any other working man,” Abe suggested, “al- though how he's going to spend it in the mid-Atlantic except by staying right on the business premises, Maw russ, T don't ae Yetther do 1, Abe," Morris re plied, “but then too, if a bunch of sailors has been working night and efte except possibly that {t will out citizenship papers before {t could of humor as American passengers, day during a big Atlantic storm. t cause American steamers to lose to Gott s en vote for Mayor Hy- Mawruas,"" Abe sald save the steamer from sinking, T also foreign steamers the,trade of * whole lan Abe 8: ASPIRIN BOOTLEGGERS NEXT. don't see how the Captain is going to lot of t who, {f trips to Euroy 1 sald different Osan et three cheers from the crew if h cost $1 ding berth and meals replied. ‘AccoHing to. Well tel) 1h tBAt Cake; “ABS It ees it hands with ah extra round couldn't ho nearer Liverpoo}, y. a foreign ship which Wouldn't surprise me tn the least if of vanilla ice cream sodas, y'under England, than one b-cent fare zone Street, New Yo: + forelgn steamship lines might fig- stand on the Brighton Beach Line of the ach a part of 421 ure that an American passenger who “No doubt Mr. Daugherty thinks Brooklyn Rapid Transit.’ Street as the Grand Central Station, would pay $150 for a dozen bottles of that in a case like that, the Captain “But Mr. Daugherty says that for- and that therefore it ain't no safer whiskey and run a chance of also should ought to serve hot coffee,’ Al eign steamers couldn't carry nosliquor legally for a passenger to take liquor paying a fine of a couple of thousand said neither, not even if they put it in the in his baggage on board such a dellars more, not to say six months ‘But netiines in January, Febru ship's vault during the stay in port steamer than it would be for a pas- in Jail, y'understand, might be willing ary and March, on a small steamer ani Tuched it with a thue luck #0 Be- Senger to take lator on urd a to make a much less sacrifice In order Abe, it’s quite a trick to make hot Admiral on board Chicago Limited in } the ship's cept if an indig to get and pay curely that gz of the carfaye to liquor on an Atlantic voyage Montreal and as for drinking tt without yiunderstand, Herr coffee or getting scalded, rouldn’t get at it till two hours senger ain't so Hable to ha Halifax,’ Morris observed mann the Great might have been able after the ship had passed the three- mr nway with “In a way, Mawruas, it's too bad to pull it off d then again he mile limit on the return trip’? Mor- be le the passer s that at this time—fust when people mightn’t,”’ Morris continued. ‘Also, ris said the om in the morning are beginning to realize how they Abe, there have been known to be FOREIGN BOAT 1S PART OF 42D) “But the Captains of them foreign could buy all the liquor they wanted storms so big that the waves put out STREET. ‘ steamers is lid act like Pullman and therefore didn't want to buy it the gual es, y'understand, and porters and get 1y with the pas- no more, y’understand—along comes while in a pinch like that the Cap “{ always thought that a foreign sengers’ entire stock the only this opinion of Mr. Daugherty and tain might get the w warmed up ship even when it was in an Ameri- excuse them Capt w ve for gives bootleggers a fresh talking point by serving them each with twenty can port was still so foreign, y'under- throwing rhoard will t a their sales campaign,” Abe sald. drops of Mathematic Spirits of Am stand, that {f a child was born on a law is a law and must be obeyed, be- ‘Which for my part, I get such @ monta ina half a tumblerful of water headache on an ocean steamer cause you can't expect foreign Cap- rom understand rr whett RIBUTIONS WESLEY BARRY’S Little Chunks of Wisdom. PIPE. HIS 1s a picture of Pipe— ar smoke, I'll say—so does W Barry. No who back on him Pipe sticks ke the cat's matter whiskers Wesley went out fishin’ the other day, and after sit tin’ all day in the sun he never got Pipe guessed the cause of his unhappt ness, so when the a bite fish man wasn't lookin’ he sneaked a fat little fish off the fce and lald it at Wesley's feet, so tickled he al most wagged his tall off and his tongue out. Wes- | Jey was surprised for a minute, then he ordered, “Take it back, old Pipe. Cheatin’ ain't nothin'—don't get you nowhere, even in fishin!” So Pipe picked it up some i and sneaked it back on the fish cart A REBUS LETTER October Contest. Ten-Year Class Award Winner. i ‘When winter comes the birds fly to their houses in the trees.”” Vester, New York City Honorable Mention Louls Weinberg, Bronx THE FAIRY MOUNTAIN Once there was a little girl named fvelyn who lived near a large mout tain. It was called Fairy Mounta yecause when the sun shone upon tt high peaks {t looked lke the golde turret of a fairy city One day as Evelyn was walking ng to find Falr ud so often mountain try tried, she sa an old woman carrying a heavy dle, As she wan a very helpful girl she asked the woman ff she ¢ be of any assistance. The we ed and told Evelyn she would eho r the way to Fairyland, as tt fuirles expeeted her Up and up they walked unt! at Ins! they came to a Iittle gc P. S.—Wasn't Wesley the candy which the old woman opened. Evel kid? T'll way so. PIPE saw a large hall filled with little fix — re i s wit gossamer wings. At the end, on Jewelled throne, sat LIFE. 1een with her fuce dd Evelyn Life is like a ship at sea ed toward the throne and a With its trials and its storme forms. ‘The sky is dark, the cruel waye high, r than red Alice. mother. Mother will “I supplies for us. There and see our have fresh Sun shines, we are happy as can | A storm comes, life fakes on ne will be apple ple and custard pudding : better than Wl we be saved or must we die? and- le cont ed Ah, is that the sun I see so bir “Welgh anchor. Pay out the main tl t see the Ca- The storm abates, it 1s from hea sheets," shouted the Pirate. ‘*We're Ja nt want light heading home m’hearties."’ th and around oe “Which way shall we go? Jamle Cape ilorn en did in the Life, indeed, ia like a ship at sea ed to know. old da f was a canal Braving many a storm and trial ou must say ‘which course will across Cer A But at last fs o 8 0. all s¢ we take,’ the Pirate corrected. “It's Going Cape won't have ALIN At eats forall Is free And goes to its end with a si By Clarice Le: my idea to sail down the West 1 the Pirate, of the States and through the Panama ‘'I' ye ey 1 forn many ; t through the “Then wo shall see Seattle, our ( id 1 new city," Jamie enthused the it you And the Golden Gate at San Fran- yvur sohn, Age 13, B br HOW TO JOIN THE KLUB. CUT OUT THIS COUPON cisco, and Los Angeles, where all the 7 trip moving picture people Hve. Won't it ita: ii ru and Begin be lovely! Can we go to see some Bi eliaaly = we get “ aay of them?" “I don't care if we don't se band App beat: a1 picture st id Jamie, in boy “# A Sante fashion want to see how t i NA movies are made, that's what in Buenos A eau terests me.” M t d rather see my Mary than all “! of the movie studios in the world ! ur 1 Alice ; “I suppose that when we stop in “L gt Oveu It Mexico you'll go to visit the presi- wa fed home dent,'’ Jamie scoffed. by way of the Horn COUPON 1,014 » the Queen drew the veil from nce, With a ery of “Mother 1 into her outstretched a fbvelyn, Evelyn,” she heard ther say Wake up! I the window and see how brigh an shines on the Fatr Moun as hy Helen McClosky, New Y NOVEMBER CONTEST Subject: “Christmas Time in Ou House.” ‘en awards of $1 each w ten Kiddie Klub mer x to fifteen. 1 best essays on '"« t n Our House st not F nust not acee; the pareme tl must a ,AME, AGH, ADD’ ATE NUMBP World OLLYKIN'S FLYING CARPET “IT AIN'T NO SAFER LEGALLY FOR A PASSENGER TO TAKE LIQUOR IN HIS BAGGAGE ON BOARD SUCH A STEAMER THAN iT WOULD BE FOR A PASSENGER TO TAKE LIQUOR ON BOARD A CAGS LIMITED iN HIS BAGGAGE end of th BLAME THE “Maybe Congress w kind words f a long wa culation of the tire weather, “Well, of half be! salod s3nn frozer What And wi Abe wouldn't desert voyage 1s also a problem.’ NOT VOL STEAD. Captain. woul ward restorin half has been sald rourse, / wrong about the Volstead act.” “There's nothing wrong with the Volstead act, Abe Morris said “The trouble is with the sea. Except in the case of one or two miracles which happened way before the Re- Democratic Parties was ever dreamt of, y’understand, nobody has been able to put over a schema which has depended for Its sucgess upon the sea being made of dry land Instead of water, and sometimer pretty rough water too. “Which, if there was drug stores in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean, the Volstead act would work fine, and if a steamer could be anchored in wate; that 1s three miles deep the Captain and crew could stop work on Sundays the way people do in smali Kansas and Utah towns and read the Sunday papers, tf they could buy a Sunday paper 2,000 miles from the nearest land,."" “Well, of course there's a grent deal in what you say, Mawruss,”’ Abo agreed, ‘‘but at the same time most of the Hquor which fs drunk at sea is served to passengers who ain't in no more danger of getting frozen or drowned than they would be if they was aitting on a country club porch in the middle of summer, y'understand In fact the biggest roar over this herr publican or Daugherty opinion is put up by fel lers who if the Captain was to come into the smoking room and say that the ship was sinking, they would play just one more round of rangs and @ consolation pot before helping with the pumps, y'understand.’ “At that, Abe, I don't think Mr Daugherty will have any more luc enforcing the Volstend act at than he has had on land,"’ Morris « clared. “Them people which don't take foreign steamers from Montreal! and Halifax with one smoking room American steamers from New Yo Went on, “and in that case if the ship where every stateroom will be a kets into a gale off Newfoundland, we smoking room and bar combined.’ would say for example, the Captain IF THEY WANT WHISKEY, LET could hand to each member of the "EM STAY IN THE U. S.A rew a prescription under the Vol “And anyway, Mawruss, what stead act, and the sailor could ut the nearest regis- , Some fifteen hundred Ket it filled out tered pharm: miles away.’ “Do you Mawr Hd be know 1. occurs done then me, Abe concluded . that If that's the best that with the Volstead act eoense of a ship at sea," Abe must he something the use of worrying about people who would go to the trouble of travelling tu Montreal and Halifax just f the sake of a little booze, y'understand “If they are so fond of whiskey as all that, let them sta at home in America They can plenty of tt here. Conyrtaht 1992, by MAILE LST OLLE LL AELLLLLL ADIOS NM CONDUCTED BY ELEANOR SCHORER llykin ’s Flying Carpet — Past n vardboa a W paste is t around t nes and ELBANOR.