The evening world. Newspaper, August 19, 1922, Page 12

The Evening World Comics | SATURDAY, AUGUST 19, 1922 | Theatrical News and Gossip t- ‘Trade Mark Reg. U. 8. Pat. oft. i$ Good Evening ! By BIDE DUDLEY OEMS OF PREFERENCE Tammany Jones of Harlem wants the velvet-lined oyster opener. But most of all he wants a nice wife. He has written us a poem about the a OH, HE WANTS. t'sow me A CAR ) oes He 7 TEM Him ANY THIN’ ‘WANT BuT IF HE STICKS AROUND HERE (Le sHow HIM “Th! BoTTOmM OF “The - ELEVATOR SHAFT "! YEX —“Ts 15 Joe — wHa'S’ ON Your MIND, Dove — ? NAW -- 2 AIN'T MAD — cL WAS dust “THROwIN’ A PEST OUTA THE OFFICE — — wHaT CAN 1 DO FOR ya —_? ees { L WANT “Té TELL You SOMETHING . MISTER HUSBAND — WHAT ABOUT OUR VACATION “OUR — bo You EXPECT % START ABOUT CHRISTMAS — WHEN ARE YOU GOING T% GET “THAT! NEw GAR 7??? ANSWER ME — They have turned the key on Broadway, Tho’ its lights at night still shine; Ev'ry ray just serves to mock us : { | All along the Broadway line. They have chased the joy from Broadway, Now it’s such a quiet spot! For they’ve ciamped the lid down tightly On the hooch and turkey-trot. When we first arrived on Broad- way, Just a dozen years ago, There were cocktails for the thirsty, There were girls from ev'ry show At the cabarets to greet us, Primed to shake a wicked hoof, And the cops just said, “Go to it, Stick around and raise the roof.” But they’ve turned the key on Broadway, Now it’s just “another street;” In the restaurants it's gloomy, All you do in them is eat. Here's a health in grapejuice, Broadway, To the joyous place you're not Since they clamped the lid down tightly On the hooch and turkey-trot. OBSERVATIONS, A big truck ran into a Spring Street restaurant yesterday. Usually the truck is on the menu. Two taxi drivers fought over a Prospective customer on Broadway last night. Well, only the brave de- serve the fare. Having lived in Colorado, we would advise William Z. Foster to avoid the State. Some of the boys out there are awfully quick tem- pered. girl he would marry. Look a’ here: I want a Uttle sweetie, Who hasn't got much sense. I do not want her knowing; I'd rather have her dense. The smart ones are suspicious And want to know too much. Dumb veauties please get busy And with me get in touch. looking yegg on the West Side. He was also good looking on his other sides. Once in the cab, Tessie took from her hand bag a cheese sandwich and bit into it greedily, Her teeth struck something hard. “This cheese certainly is tough,” she murmured, Little children were dancing on the sidewalks, Old women gat on stools and lazy, uncoated men lounged about. But, of course, they were not to be blamed for the bad cheese. There might have been a dia- mond in it. Maybe it was the stone lost by Muriel de BeWe- ville, the noted society beauty. The cab came to a stop and Tessie stepped out. “Get me a keg of beer,” she said to the driver, “I’ve got a toothache.” "Twas plain to be seen the . taxi driver was in love with the girl. (To be continued.) i] A Sentimental Cuss. Martin O'Brien has been married thirty years and he still has the first rolling pin his wife ever hit him with.—Wellaville Optic. Who's Looney Now? We weren't prepared for the bliz- zard yesterday. Our overcoat was A certain young actress Com-| threadbare and our mittens full of plained of a dramatic critic recently, holes, but we had to wear them. As saying “you had no right to say MY] .. came along Broadway, we met legs don't match.” What he said was “her legs are matchless.” TAXICAB TESSIE. (The story of a city girl who went fhe pace that kills.) "Twas a- pleasant evening in the great city, The sun had sunk behind the old brewery in Jersey and all nature seemed at rest. A ferry boat crossed the Hudson and nosed its way into @ pier. “Oh, taxi!” A sweet girl had called. She had arrived on the ferry and wore a wrist watch. The taxt- cab drew up at the curb. , “Well, if it ain’t Taxicab Tes- wie!” said the driver” “Where you been, Tessie?” Tessie looked him over search- ingly. She did not care to divulge her innermost secret to this man. Anyway, he seemed top fresh, so she just got in the ead. “Bumpus Cafe,” she sald. The cab sped away. As it left, @ dark skinned man entered an- ether cab and followed. He was Toady Allen, the best Bradford Kirkbride stamping to keep his. feet warm. He spoke to us, but until we removed our ear- muffs we couldn't hear him. “This weather would freeze a leg off a brass monkey,” he sald. “Yes,” we replied, “and yet some people kick when it is warm in win- ter.” ‘As we moved away a snow plough came along clearing the street car tracks. It stopped and the men on {t went into a cigar store to get warm. At the corner of 44th Street we slipped on the icy sidewalk and fell, striking our head. We man- aged to get to the World Building, where we found the mercury stood at 42 degrees below zero. We went into a drug store and obtained a cup of hot chocolate. On attempting to use our typewriter we found two of our fingers were frost-bitten. Kindly note the caption on this story and mail us your reply. AND NOW PERMIT US to inform you that there is a drug store on upper Madison Avenue that really carries drugs. * About Plays hee MESSRS. SHUBERT have decided to present the London musical play, “The Lady of the Rose,"’ in this country under the title of "The Lady in Ermine." This is the piece in which Eleanor Painter will have the leading role. Broadway hears it may be seen at the Al Jolson Theatre, the house named after Broadway's best known bridegroom. ANOTHER MUSICAL SHOW. A new musical comedy called “The @ingham Giri’ will begin an engage- ment at the Eart Carroll Thestre on Aug. 28. Eddie Buzzel and He'en Ford are in it. Originally this one was called “Love and Kisses." BARRY IN IRELAND. A letter from Tom Barry, wright, dated Dublin, whys: “What with the ‘Regulars’ (brawny Jads with rifles) dashing through the streets in armed lorries, the ‘Irregu- lars’ making the night ring with their mbharp and incessant fusillades from house tops, the English army chatting pleasuntly with the natives and keep- fmg hands off, the great funeral yes- terday of Harry Boland, through crowded streets followed by scores of priests on foot, the suspicion with which every one regards the stranger, also one another, soldiers parading up and down hotel corridors all through the night, and the best of John Power play- is just in. It and Players & Son whiskey at a shilling, I'm after tellin’ you there's no better place in the world for an Irishman right now than Dublin." “PROS” SEE “THE MONSTER.” A professional matinee performance of ‘The Monster" was given at the 39th Street Theatre yesterday. Stars by the dozen attended, The house was packed with theatrical people. EQUITY TO ENTERTAIN. The first of a series of special after- noons, held by the Equity Players, Inc., will take place at the 48th Street ‘Theatre Monday at 2 P. M. Francis Wilson will talk on ‘The Vision of the Equity Players;'' Augustin Duncan will discuss ‘‘The American Theatre’’ and other speakers will be Elsie Fer- guson and Grant Mitchell. The public is invited ENGAGEMENTS, Carlotta Monterey has been en- waged by E. Ray Goetz for a role in “The Star Sapphire." star of "The Ginger Box "’ has returned to vaudeville and will be at Proctor's Fifth Avenue Monday, Charles Hampden will join the cast of “The Goldfish," Marjorie Ram- beau's starring vehicle, noxt wook, Emma Janvier has beon added to the cast of Molly Darling," opening at the Liberty in two weoka, Trade Mark Reg. U. COMES A TERMATS @ vw . oa Wa ye Cope, 1822 (N.Y. Eva, Weeld) By Prom Pub. Co KATINKA SS 8. Pat. Off DID You Nonce MY New PHoTo ON THE “TABLE “TRY AN’ Dear 2 miss 17 § Trade Mark Reg. U ‘Trade Mark Reg. U. — Do You THINK \T DoES ME SveTice ? . 8. Pat. Off, HEY MOMs TicY Busted | SHE WENT 4nd DODEED THE TERMATO I THREW AT ‘ER ¢ = & WINDOW - => iuuY ~BuUSTED | A WINDow ¢ a) 8. Pat. Off. d the Issue! MERRY MAVIKOPRS Mont go-46e@ To nenyee Te CRY Ae On mAH HAND Ke eCHER — EAR 2 GucdT ¥ $5 uw VWsnewe _ War s Bion 4 BEAT On “He PIANO ALL Y5u Pease we YOUR MOTHER 1S | TRYING 78 Tan FDxA wank. erate Sean. SEND A MERR MixuP ace MARY MIKUP. THE BOSS |S GIVING A DINNER To A LOT OF POLITICIANS [p'NIGHT! HEl| AGAINST LIQUOR. WHEN THEYR WANTS To RUN FoR ASSEMBLY ON THE PROHIBITION TickeT Nex! YEAR AN’ HAS INVITED THE WHOLE. P, f; “ wR GY ve Won.) By pus co BEAUTIFUL BAB JUST LOOK AT BERTIE = HE MUST SPEND ALL HIS TIME AND MONEY ON DRESSING?| HOW VAIN THE BoYs ARE NOWADAYS = ALL THEY CARE ABOUT IS THEIR PERSONAL LOOKS -THEIR CLOTHES = JUST LOOK AT THAT SILLY OUTFIT HE HAS ON - HE OUGHT To GET ALONG PRETTY WELL WITH MY COUSIN YVONNE wHo's COMING TO ViStT ME NEXT WEEK Gossip, ‘The Lights will hold thelr vaude- ville show at the Columbia, Far Rook- away, to-morrow night The new Webor and IMelda Bhubert of Robert M, Catts, yesterday, Rose Shulsinger has been appoint- 64 publielty director for the interests Max and Morits, two ohimpanaees, are on thelr way from Murope to Join Vaudeville Unit went into rehoursalla forthooming Shubert munioal ee The Miftioth performance of “Aus, THe PROMIBITION PARTY iS READY FoR DINNER, INSTEAD OF SERVING THE Foob - WALKIN WITH A TRAY FULL OF COCKTAILS = AND YouR Boss y : i WILL GET So CHAD HE'LL FIRE You On @\HHE SPOT RTY HERE ¢ PARIS AND SHE'S BRINGING A COMPLETE NEW WARDROBE =SHE'LL FYPECT THE BOYS TO LOOK MIGHTY SLICK \F THEY WANT HER COMPANY WE'LL LEAVE THE SPEAKING | YESH! ANT WHEN OUR PARTY UNTIL LATER, GENTLEMEN AND HAVE DINNER! 5 7 Tu Figst COURSE 4 Mees To HAKe NoMINATIONS, ff | 1iC)= WERE GONNA NAME You LRING FoR THE j a (Hic) FOR GOVERNOR BAB SAID SHE HAS WON SEVERAL BEAUTY PRIZES Too (Copyright, Bquare Theatre Tuesday night. There will be na apeolal "dancing noanion, beginning nt 2.45 o'clock La- bor Day at the Terrace Garden Dance Palace, souvonira will be distributed, Dear” will be given at the Times] Monday night sessions will be re- Danoing will be free and|at Saratoga yesterday FOOLISHMENT, KATINKA, You'Re ALL RIGHT! THAT WAS AGREAT 10e: OF YouRS To pad | ALL RIGHT-BRING ON YVONNE PUT IT IN THE ACT. sumed that day also. A littie dog was on a roof, Husband—Dear, I'm going to bring A THOUGHT FOR TO-DAY. And frequently he'd woof woot, you a moitkey as a pet. ; Each time a tom-cat made a roar, Wife—Excelle y 1 Blossom me won the third race 2 — * a nt, my love! @hen I Respectfully | He'd woof once more—aye, woof once} won't miss you when you stay oub/ The |referred to C. P. Grencker! more. late nights, ' 2 ‘ f v 4