The evening world. Newspaper, September 5, 1919, Page 22

By BIDE : ‘WAY is threatened with rs &n Unusual theatrical enter- tainment. If it ever comes to pass it will be an All-Dooley affair, ‘based on Dooleyiam, and offering Doctoyism in various forma for the edifoation Ag the masses. It took us ten minutes to think up this opening paragraph. How do you like it? ‘The idea i# this: Out of Phila phia bas como a family of Dooley whose members have made quite #6me rattle in the theatrical business. There's Johnny Dooley, Gordon Dooley, Ray Dooley, William Dooley, Yvette Rugol Dooley and Eddie Dowling Dooley (wifo's name tacked om to make the story good). It is Pfoposed by Johnny Dooley, who struck out while playmg with the “ellies/' to present on Broadway a reyus with a company mado up of Dooteys and ten chorus girls. Johnny already pehmanshipped tho book, ho calis it “Pardon Me!” Jack julse might write some of the times, if tunes are needed, and all t ‘would remain to make the show big bit would be audiences. The i ition is taking form, #0 have @ care! “and in tho mean time Jobnny Dooley is raising a mustache #0 panpie won't know hin, and he won't ba bothered with capitalists who ‘want to put monoy in the show. ATTENTION, UNDERTAKERS! Archio Rac doesn't like the way Brooklyn poots pick on the Bronx. ‘Thie is the way ho puts it: 1 live in the Bronz, I'm proud to say, My name, I'll tell you, ie Archic Raa, I'm known all over by the things T writes Concerning those cheesy Brooklyn- ites, Of course in Brooklyn there are rum- mics too, But a little secret I'll disclose to you Bach and every one of them, it's plain to sce, Ie as dead as dead can be. sHOCKED BY PATELLAS. Bibert Soverance, of the Hippo- About Plays and Players One 1s for use where the maiden fair she bas brown. If your girl has blue orbs pop ber with this one, Rufus: They tcll me you are fond and true, with this: drug stores if someoody would givo us a cuuple of love ditties for change- | able hair, “My Once In a, While,” which Sclb- DUDLEY. BLANEYS ANNOUNCING. Charles E, and Harry Clay Bianey new Oriental play called “The ted One,” by Forrest Halsey, and announce they will open it during the latter part of October, After that the Blaneys plan to present a new farce called, “Not To-Night Dearie.” [t was written by Sidney Ainsworth, an English dramatist. WISH WE COULD TELL IT. Goorge Kaufman told a story at the | Managers’ Press Headquarters yen- | torday that we conaldered right witty. He wants 16 uso ft In Banday’s Times, so wo can't tell it here, But don't take it too much to heart, dear read- era, It was merely something about somebody saying Louis Mann had wonderful command of the English language, and Willie Collier replying: | “Command? Say, he's lost control of it.” Read the Timgs Sunday and you'll get the story. KELLERD GOES wesT. John BE. Kellerd, Shakespearian | Player, has Jeft Now York with a carefuliy seldcted company for a sea- son of repertoire under the manage- ment of William F. Connor. He will open in Sak Lake City on Sept. 18 and then play several weeks at the Columbia Theatre, San Francisco. FIRST AID TO LOVE. Nick O’Teen, who is an expert at both love and poetry, writes us that. he bas just completed two rhymes which he offers lovers free of charge. has blue eyes and the other where, 1 gace into your eyes of blue, Those mystic stars of love, My ange! from above, If she has brown latnps spear her 1 gaze into your cyces of brown, Those mystic stars of love, In modesty you cast them down, My angel from above. It would be ‘nice in these days of Gossip. Audrey Baird has heen engaged for ; ‘LITTLE MARY MIXUP COMIC PAGE FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 6, 1919 * HM-mM! NoZIR, LUKE” — I CANT Bo NOTHIN FoR ae ate Su et titi i asia — SL, Now MY NEW UMBRELLA WoNT GET WaT —~ @rome's press, department, comes| lla Theatrical ‘Enterprises will pro- from Emporia, Kan., and, like most | tuce. § Kanpans, is quict, solemn and, to a Clarence Hibbard says he would ye ‘extent, hungry looking, The| Kindly like to have people know he time Elbert saw “Happy Days” ms a new bred peg ici a 4 1 janager ual wi 0! a Lil ° v the go Segoe n at the Hippe: ganteat at Proc tor's Fitth i 4 ITS BEEN DELIGHTFUL , JoE - lence!” he eatre ‘ginning xt lon re peabeten ieee at ate Marcus Loew wi ‘rebulld his the- SITTING WERE IN THE HOT SUN ‘Two horus atre in Ne’ ec. The capacit; bed Just trigped ents eee wil be made 2,000. rere FoR HALF AN HOUR! "t New York got a patolla| Selwyn & Co. now announce that 2 asked Elbert. the run of “The Challenge” will be t's that?” asked Murdock | resumed at the Solwyn Theatre Sat- urday night. ‘The War Camp Community Centre dresses that cover th» |s trying to lease a theatre for a year. talla. We got such an} (t would be used to furnish entortain- in Emporia ind, A it. for eoldiers, sailors and other t it, don't believe workgra. the low will ever piay| Lillian Russell and husband, Alex- with u patellas siow-| ander P. Moore, have taken an apart- ment at the Hotel Majestic for it he stayed and saw the sceve| winter. Complexion fine. through and—s-h-h-h! they sey| younger than ever and on he seen It four times since. In| wonderfully! fact, he’s become a patella fer The Puech and Zudy Tpeatre Com- he pany, Inc., represente: its man- HELL CLOSE 'EM UP. 4 . 4 aging director, Charles Hopkins, has TI gotta start to school next week, | become & member of the Producing An’ I jest hate it, too; Managers’ Association. It never docs a kid nd good, A THOUGHT FOR TO-DAY. But gee, what kin he do? Constable Mark Ding has a new cateyr Aagernd peepee. Aw Shizemabodgeivalioriie Oats. (7. Br some fool thing like spellin’ words, JOE’S CAR WHEN was the LAST “TimE You Put’ WATER IN “THE BaTTERY.? WELL , TH STORAGE BATTERY 1s BEAD! “HEY aAin'T EVEN ENOUGH Juice tN IT St make A sPaRK:! WHa's “TH matter HERE? Y'BEEN FOOLIN' with HER? SWE WON'T stant! WELL ,GOSH — I CouLDN'T GET | Awty ANY SOONER: . Sit ites Pls 4 (PERSONAL cvtnnestt FOOLISHMENT. thought makes | “Lwonder where he te to-night, Bae ot me oleh | LS woutn f Foved 00 well, Quoth Mary Ann Hiiza Botts, Unto her siater Nell. “Right off my hand my diamond ring, One evening he did pick it, T wonder where he is to-night, Fer girls I s*pose that schools are good, For oys they're jest a bore; TY all of ‘em wus closed up tight, We'd learn ourselves much more. If ['m elected President— I mean when I'm a man— To ali the learnin’ jails for boys, TU tie a great big can, Vd like to. get the ticket.” FROM THE CHESTNUT TREE. “What's the matter with Smith? “He was hit by an auto.” “How did it happen ?s “He was picking up a horseshoe for good luck.” TO THE POINT. ID any- comme it on the way you handled your new car?” “One man ninde a brief romark, ‘Fifty dollars and costs.'"—Buston Transcript, , Ie ea WHEN THE THIEF CROP WAS Good, HE City of Washington used to ‘As have a Chief of Police, since ‘= gone to unknown parts, who ‘Wes known as a great thief catcher, Far and wide he was uccredited with being “death on pickpockets." He had developed a staff of plaiaciothes men, who, it was popularly reported, éould discern a “dip” ora “moll- buzzer" through @ stone wall, Yet the light-fingered ones flocked to the capital whenever a big crowd * ‘dongregated there, and took a chance. a certain year ca fs wi “awn, ek wen wan 10 Presidcat o! e on. w aid rious Blekpociet had been sought vainly by the Chicago police word came on March route to Washington, phe, showing him in ind frent v! jengo rorues’ gal “The Day's Good Stories the authorities had three copies of each view made and sent the six ictures by special delivery to Wash- ington, requesting the capital police to watch for the fugitive, ‘Three hours after the Washington police received 'the pictures, the chief wired: to Chicago: “Have arrested four of the men you want. Kxpect to have other two rounded up %y night,"—Cartoons! Magazine, > WANTED TO BE DIGNIFIED, EBBCCA, aged eight years, was very proud of her father's rank asa First Lieutenant, and grew Qilite indignant when a neighbor boy called him “Captain.” “IM have you understand that my daddy ts not Captain,” whe sald, , It doesn’t matter,” boy, he ts an oficer” replied the “Indeed he iy not an officer,” she protested. “Yes, dear, a Lieutenunt is an om- cor,” Interrupted Rebecca's mother, “Well,” persisted Rebecca, still de- termined to maintain her daddy's dig- nity at all coet, “he's not much of an officer.” Buffalo Commercial, —— EXPLAINED, 467 WISH. vou would speak to my hus- band about oyster culture.” “Ian’t he inter- ested in itt” *"L should say him eat THE OLD FAMILY SKELETON FATHER. WAS A LOVER OF FINA MOTCR CARS. AE OWNEO THE FIRST AUTOMOBILE THAT EVER RAN OV WHE STREETS OF Sk UTES? HE HAD A NEW CAR EVERY YEAR. HE HAD r20RE. CARS THAN AMY OTHER. MAN Ia TOWNE “And When He Rode—and When He Rode—He Always Rode Alone!” - HE MAOE. TWENTY - EIGHT. ROUND TRIPS PROM COAST TO COAST. HE FRACT/CALLY LiveO WW WS AUTOMOBILE! MOTORING WAS HS HOOD. He MOTOREO MORNWG, WOON ANO NIGHT! ; “NOBODY” HE SELLS THE CusTomEeRS ALL THE SUGAR THEY WANT! Send a Nobody* to “Grindstone George” 7 HAVEN AX POUND 1) THE HOUSE ANG ONING 79 A GREAT SHORTAGE OF C/E5 1o UNABLE FO You AN LANATION ON SHORTAGE i SUGAR} YES, BUT HE NEVER TOOK WIS NEIGHBORS FORA RIDE!