The evening world. Newspaper, June 20, 1918, Page 22

Soa eo AMIENS GLB ee iz we Te -_ ENS ed — “MARY _MIXUP 7 The Advantage of Being a “Twin Depends Upon Which Twin You Are! a = wnat You THE “TeacHeR WAS Gone . [Sogp ——_ a rae LAUGHING aT TS LICK US Bot BUT fe Dip NT LICK ME c AND peste) COMIC PAGE Thursday, June 20, 1918 About Plays and Hlayers | By BIDE DUDLEY HE CounDN'T FELL US AY “BROTHER TT, as a rule, isn't very @ on the stage. The public t Cay doesn't want to sit there @nd merely smile; it wants to burst @Ut laughing. It wants humor, or at Feast a form of humor, And now for @ confession! One time we were asked to write @ Vaudeville sketch for a comedian ‘With a reputation for being funny “Put some wit in it,” said the pro- ducer, “You're a witty guy.” ‘We curtsied and went to work The wain scene was that in which the cometian was introduced He ‘was a king of somo sort. Into this @eene we juromed yome of our Grade A pasteurized wit. Two weeks later < Sj We saw the sketch The entrance - . | ‘ ished the biggest laugh of . ffair, but was our wit in ell, rdly. Instead the come- Fy bad fixed it up bimself. It ree JOE’S CAR fe this: Girls—-Lall to the king! H i : . an Was aie to Nat You Can Appreciate This, If You Own a Cart with the king?” T Brenna wore! Me sketch was a “knockout” and . 4 Yap 4 year in vaudeville. BEST LAID PLANS, ETC. George Sammis, manager of the Mercedes vaudeville show which is Conn AaNt, 118 Prone Femliening Co (NY Meee! Not-essentiaL INousTRIEs No, 8008 - WELL — ITS 10 Now! “THEY SAID (T WOULD BE. READY AT 10 "8 (T'S 945 DEAR ~THEY SAID THEY D Have THE CAR READY AT Io SHARP! You HAVE YOUR THINGS ON, BLANCHE! \LL BE RIGHT BACK = - DONT een” ‘Ho bellevee. tb making iL : \ OH Bis bank account eo attractive that L GO AN GET IT! KEEP ME WAITING! \4 amcast @ Ch acason enna , v ‘¢ ILL OR SOMETHIN ¢ Overy dollar that sees it will want to the club. Monday he was at : } L HAVENT HAD A BITE done BY 11 FOR “Two HOURS! i» Merritt, near Tenafly, N. J., and ho received an invitation from his old friend, Louis Robie, who lives at Arundel, eight miles from Tenafly, (© make him a visit “I'll take him up,” sald George tor @ friend. “I'll get threo meals, a night's lodging and a fine bath free id, in addition, I'll just collect a few es from Loule at rhum." George paid $1.50 taxicab fare ¢o get to Arundel. He had the meals, bed and bath all right, but now comes the gad part. His friend, Itobie, col- lected just $12 at rhum “I figure,” said George last night, “that it might have been cheaper for Me to stay at Camp Merritt.” 1 was glad to be George's host,” said Mr. Robie. John Charles Thomas of “Maytine” | @ecided to well his last year’s auto receptly. A dealor found a prospec- tive buyer and Mr. Thomas at once began to demonstrate his lack of knowledge of salesmanship. | “It's a pretty fair car,” he sald, | “but the oil pan rattles, one spark YESSANTVE GoT A GREAT (DEA THAT'LL ‘6 A MACHINE GUN* THAT CAN plug refuses to spark and the clutch . ’ slips.” HELP WIN TH’ war? ~ He then took the man for a ride. || “~ WoT 19 vos 2,000 sre ta He hit every bump he could to prove TT-A" WINGLESS aA MINUTE! that the oll pan rattled, but it would not rattle. Not only that, but the spark plug sparked in great shape and the clutch refused to slip. The man bought the car and said Mr. ‘Thomas didn't kngw anything about autos. \ “Wait and see,” ‘bald the actor./ “Those defects will show up.” And then he went home, mad be- eause the man had questioned his veracity. JOLSON SHOW TO CLOSE. The Messrs, Shubert announce that Al Jolson'’s engagement in “Sinbad,” at the Winter Garden, will be brought to a close Saturday, July 6. Al wants & vacation. The annouacement further states that the attraction will re-open @uring the second week in August at the 44th Street Theatre for a supple- mentary run, The show went into the Winter Garden on Feb. 14. i} A WAR STAMP RHYME. | Finley Peter Dunne, Publicity Direc- for the National War Savings Com- | ittee, urges us to write and print a rhyme or something aaking the public to buy War Savings Stamps. All right, we will; ‘but remember, he's to blame for this one—he wanted it: If, yon have some extra dough rege tehare Jour savings grow igugour daughter tg Kok Fou ere aime, eit liead Don't get “foolish “trash instead Bus Some stamps, Seff-dental belpe & heap, Duy some Sigmps “are working’ while you aleey uy AIRPLANE * hes CORRECTLY DIAGNOSED, HERE used to be a little restam rant in Washington famed for {ts Southern brevkfasts, where the chief waiter was an aged darky of beautiful manners and unshakeble | dignity, {| One morning a rather severe ap- | Pearing elderly gentleman, with ao “NOBODY DOES IT” (Sena a Nobody’ to Grindstone George) Prom Dorothy Landau Intervale Ave snowy mustache and a keen eye, en- tered the establishment. He was a |stranger, but the vencrable walter, after a quick survey of the new pa- | tron, felt no doubt. He approached with a napkin over his arm end awed low and politely. “Good mornin’, Gin'ral,” be quid ventatively, in greeting. “IT am not a General, * snap; Deck Re undentende the customer, is aI lroa. “*Scuse me, Admiral,” cried the aa q negro; “what time tatt, —||"tia tare nant tes Se “Well, sh, nowed amongst ‘deface cyadn somowhase, Kin I have the pleacure of orderta’ | you some ham and wr Saturday Evening I’o We're Qovar ‘which, most be wou "eat what Finkey_ Peter ‘Liunze! amps, ET TU, DUFFY. From M. J. Duffy, press agent of the Fifth Avenue Theatre, we learn that Mabe) Burke, appearing ar .out theatre, dropped a diamond ring in a subway grating, and the excitement almost stopped ‘traffic on Broadway. A stage hand recovered the ring and Miss Burke was about to give him an automobile when she discovered she didn't have one with her. Wotica—No more “lost diamond tales will be printed in this column this week GOSssiP. J. Van Cleft Cooper hus heen et ; ? , y , aged as an organist at the Rivol wan “ Cora Tracy, contralto, will sing at — : the Strand'next week “Come ross” will open at the Bel oe iY y ” » y ta A y , rove ~ ° co Washington, July §. SOMEWHERE IN NEW YORK Every Autoist Auto Have Access to an Auto Accessory Store! night at Camp Merritt (Fe 1; Rheumatic | USE TELEPHONE A THOUGHT FOR TO-DAY. Tessie ernie : . ARO: Te td Ww Orcar Keno, the only young man in | pgereee X can LXIN ABOUT) ORops in to BNO Bonk SrRaicar TAS: We * ! LISsEN! ip -rou Que Sw Y Wahoo, Ia, the draft missed. intents AOE) 7 She PAE ENGINES Buy A SILLY- You Act Line A ROLLS ERD, Any CANT A FORD AN OT OMOBILE T to enlist, fe says the girls ure danc Abinto | ( SINGER SoN Stn’ as foo!" ae noice est | eae Ae, SCHOOL Cc MA ic Har him to death AR RL Bol Lone MNECESSORY « ' ? * | BUY A FiivyeR! — MATCH My} LON HIGAS ACCESSORY. Motor AND HE'O LESSON sirsr. 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