The evening world. Newspaper, November 19, 1913, Page 17

The e Be ‘‘S’Matter, Pop?’’ » Bi» i «x 1e Evening World Daily Ma gazin — a e. Wednesday, November: 19, 1913 lossom By Elsa HEN a young man is big enough to resign from the Boy | Scouts and land on a regular payroll for nine or more @ week and have his measure- ents at the tailors and bis initials alongside of Admiral Dewey's picture on A ehaving mug at the barver's, a refer- endum of mothers and daughters would decide that he is nobust enough to go courting all by his lonely. Just supposing it is Johnny's regular night out. He appears all dolled up, with a smear of pomade on his hair, a dash of cologne on his brow and a dust of tal- cum on his chin, attaches himself to a cane and whistles himself in ragtime out the front door and hotfoots it around to Isabelle’s. Does it occur to any other voting member of the family that etiquette will R. be given a terrible jolt if somebody ,\ doesn't sort of chaperon Johnny on his J Sone big nisht in the week? Does his father or his uncle ¢onceive {t to be @ duty to accompany him on his mission of love and take a perch in the save-the-gas parlor with Johnny /) an@ Isabelle and put over the staple “Ine of talk about crops and a side line about the weather and give firet ald to general conversation, while the cuckao clock chirps the half hours till 11.90 or so? No; not to any great extent. And if Johnny, unattended, makes Tsabelle's at sharp 8.30, rain or shine, typhoon or tornado, with a two pound box of selected chocolates in his side Pocket, in the name of Lohengrin, who wrote the wedding march, why shouldn't Isabelle have the parlor of, at least, the cosy corner for herself and one evening? % fellow is all keyed up to propose Diary of a By Alma HWEN-EVUR yuh try to be ven- W shursum or practiss somethin what wood bring money to the famty in yeers to come yuh get calld. doun by somewon. Yesturday it wuz rainin in the afturnoon when I came hoam frum skool so I kuddint play owt- side so I went ovur ¢o Dickys howse an played with him, An he showed me how to be a sord-swallerer he seen it in the movin pikshure Its a pipe, when yuh know how ail ywh gotta do ts put yer arm in front av yer chest an put yer hand ovur yer mowth (the one yuh got on the handul uv the sord) and then whenn yuh te be pushin it doun into yer insides tts only goin doun yer sleev. Dicky didint have no sleev in the howse big enuff fer a regiar sord so he used potater peeler an gosh the way he did it yoh wus sure yuh woodint never see that potater pecler agen. So he giv me Jesouns how an soon I wus as slik as him, so whenn I came hoam I thought a potater peeler, wus a awful baby thing to practiss with (an ennyhow we aint got one bee-cauze owr hired girl she peels potaters with a meet chop- pur) so I thought I wood get some. thin ree] danjerus so I got my fathure raser. An oo I wuz gettin all reddy to swaller it whenn ail uv @ suddin pa came in an like to thru a fit an grabd it away frum me. He sed we aint had no sord- ewallerer in the famly since ma’s grand- D& used to convay fodder to his face ja that mannur, VERY once in E &@ while I re- ceive a letter from a girl who has lent a ring or pin oF some other jarticle of jewelry to @ young man, quarrelied with him later on, and who now declares, with tears, that he has refused to re- turn the gage of her favor, which she too confidently such a case into the police court, and yet there ts often no other way in which ahe can compel the return of personal property which she has put in the hands of @ man triend, ‘Tho trick of letting a man triend wear WHO LIKES A CHAPERON? A Lectare for Women and Girls Only, Deitwered Before the Orange 2 Seay ther and the particular business of| night shifts to catch the late trolley te & girl, how on earth is he going to! must be eome other time, Copyright, 1918, by The Press Publishing Oo, (The New York Evening World). ‘D}—an I had on a tie what I had borowed iL ea! as Betty Vincent’s Advice to Lovers. Crosby. Copyright, 1913, by The Prem Pubttshing Co, (The New York Evening World). go about it with a chaperon person holding the aoupon for the reserved seat in the next morris chair and Present early, prepared to ait through the entire performance? It simply can't be done and no one would think of trying. When a@ fellow arrives at that climax Period in his courtship he comes with @ nice little speech, some flowers, a new necktie and an ecstatic look, He watches the clock and his oppor- tunity and at the critical moment for- wets just how he was going to begin and substitutes for his well chosen words a reries of eloquent stutters and @ cough or two. But she understands. ; Imagine going through this with an exclamation point in black silk over in the other corner! Nowhere in the ritual of romance can you find a provision for the presence in the parlor lookout of a certain party in double lens field glasses and ears to match. There's only one password for the lodge on that night and only two per- sons have It. The two-carat solitaire, without which no girl knows exactly where she's at, has never been known to find its way on an engagement finger if an outsider is half hiding in the portieres. Why, if chaperons were common or even occasional on sweetheart nights, it; would upset all ordinary calculations, There wouldn't be enough quiet home weddings or gay church affairs to pay the officiating clergyman's car fare, to say nothing about the ice cream and the forget-me-nots. A good part of the marrying would; be done over the line !n the next county. | And Justices of the Peace would h trade. ' If there ts a time for @ chaperon it Little Boy Woodward oh An then this afturnoon I got in ans uther fuss an I wuz a Innosent party. Owr hired girl always gives me the pans, to Hck when she matks choklut cake | bee-causze she knows I lick em faster an moar kompleetly than sls, and so the stuff dont get a chanse to dry an stik on em an then she dont have to use so much washing pouder to get It off. 80 I wus lickin choklut to beet the band an doin a iittul polish jig what she tawt me at the same time an sis/| she gumshoes in an Just at that momint | had the pan up in front uv my face an she bit It on the bottim an gee in a minit I had choklut draiped all ovur me frum pa. Ownly he didint know yet I borowed It. Well, when I begin to think uv what wuz comin to me when pa would find out I borowed it I felt like punchin the day-lights out uv but I kep remem. | erin yuh musint hit a {uy done it eether only she began to scoop up gome uv the choklut with her fingers an eet it an that is a very un- helthy thing to do on akkownt uv germs so I thought !f she kood be such a littul hit her. An then we wus both put to bed fer fightin’, This is no mood what fits a sweet ending #0 I will end with @ riddul, Why isint @ choklut sawsepan like a clowd? Ansur—Bee-causze it aint got a silvur dining! P. 8. Yuh can see whatz on my mind by the riddul, one's ring or stickpin is a silly relic of; sentimental schoo] friendships, and no prudent, self-respecting young woman| will risk the possibly unpleasant con- Sequences of Buch a proceeding. — | “E. D." writes am deeply attached to @ certain young lady, but a young} man who Is a friend of mine and who Js out of town at present called upon her frequently before he went away. Would I be treating him unfairly if I offered attentions to the young lady?’ Go ahead, unless he is engaged to her. Perhaps it might be well to tell him of your desires, “B, 6." writes: “A cousin of mine is! about to have an engagement party, Is) {t necessary for me to give him a pres- irl an I woodint | bla hy pig it woodint herwher to get hit o I)? When East (Copyright, 1912, vy Hobbe- Merrill Co.) SYNOPSIS OF PRECEDING CHAPTERS. tor," owner of a mineral prin dies, bemving the establishment to scapegrace ‘grandeon Dick om contition that Di take charge of the place within one week after the funeral act romain ‘there coutimuoualy for the wext two tonite. But Dick cannot be found, | Minnie, the red:tiaited girk the my (woolly the Haars} tech worried evershiy ane fence. She Is also worried over the approaching mu the ngs oe sanatorium for iunie learns as the “week of draws near anend thee Dick has ‘summer race” ne and impersonate Dick, ment unt) thé heir's arr le the real Di oned with Patty m schoolgiet ste! Minute induces them ‘to bide tn « deserted They arrange to @ay there for the time, lierc, who tas fallen in love with Patty, consents (9 keop up the farce of impersouati CHAPTER X. (Continued) Another Complication. = po it's feasible,’ Mr, Dick ] said in a relieved voice, get- i} ting a up and beginning to f strut up and down the room, “It isn't as though I'm beyond call, You can come out here and consult me if you get stuck. And then there's Minnie; she knows a food bit about the old place.” urse" sald Mr, Dick, "T expect i you understand t n contro’ Pi suppose, You an com every a {mstructions. 1 say sanatoriums are hardly your } Mr. Pierce was looking at Miss Patty and she knew ft, When @ woman looks a# unconscious as she did it isn’t natural. “Eh—oh, wel coming to himself: thing else, I belleve, It can't be worse than carrying a bunch of sweet peas from garden to garden,” Mr. Dick stopped walking and turned suddenly to stare at Mr. Pierce, “Sweet—what?” he sald, Everybody cise was talking, and I ent and, if s0, what?’ If the other guests bring presents you, should do ee, But choose something mee was the only one who saw him change color. “Sweet peas.” aid Mr. Plerce, "id that reminds me—I'd like to make wie eomililion Ms Carte, 1 ies) ia amone- Meets West he Fanniest Story of America’s| By Mary Roberts Rinenart Where Ther e’s a Will i Greatest Woman Humorist | ure respon¥ible for the company, Most 1 assure you I have no in but I'm sorry for her; 6! “Mumps!” everybody sald together, ted Mr, Sam looked at his brother-in- aw. “Kid in the play got ‘em, and they spread aroun Mr. Plerce explained. ity disease, “Why, you've Just Dicky!" sald his wife, had them, too, They all turned to look at him, and I must say his ex- pression was curic Luckily, I had the wit to knock over the breakfast basket, which was still there, and when we'd gathered up the broken china Mr, Dick had got himself in rry, old man,” he said to Mr. ut I'm not in favor of bring- the person you speak of—up to the sanatorium just now, Mumps, you know—very centagious, and all over that part,” Mr, Pierce ‘she oniy needs to rest.” Certalnly—let her come,” said Mrs, they're as contagious as Dicky. aii that, you haven't been afraid of my getting them.” T=I'en not tn favor "Mr. Dick ‘Tie minute "ve got the Dick sat up sudder tainly, 1f ehe up." said Miss Patty. know your name is not © She's discretion itselé, said. “Her salary hasn't bi @ month, and aa I'm respon: be glad to see her looked afte: “T don't want her here, I'll pay her board at the hotel.” Mr. Dick began, won't she “only for heaven's @ake, don't He stopped, for every one was ataring. "Why tn the world would you do that? Miss Patty asked, Don't be ridiculous, ‘That's the only cyndition Mr Pierce has made. Mr. Dick stalked to the window and looked out, his hands in his pockets. I couldn't help the being reminded of a4 mun opex Gem — eee A (American Girl and Oriental Girl, Together):—How DARE She her! aghoe) won't uous’ abe aid. dolding out the Gita i oe we BA we By C. M. Payne HASNT GoT TTHASNT Copyright, 1913, by The Press Publishing Co, (The New York Evening World.) The Evening World will award a IMPROVED BAD TOOLS GOOD Jos. I was thirteen years old, not very fond of school and very anxious to go to work, Painting waa my pref- erence. I succeeded in getting @ Job at it, at eight shillings a week. My first Job was to paint @ lot of Kitchen ranges, which were rusty. FOR The foraman took me to the Job and showed me what to do. When he had gone 1 looked at the brush then at the paint then at the ranges. The ush had about nine hairs in it he house was new and vacant, Leaning against the wall was an old hair broc I pulled three or four knots of hair out of the broom and tied them to the handle of the brush with half of one of my @hoe laces. | now had a pretty good bruah to work with, so started in. I had just Mnished one range when the foreman came in and saw to his astonieAment the range fin- ished, He said, “Well, young man, 1 pee I couldn't fool you.” He patted me on the back and said, “You're all right; and at the same time took a nice new brush out of his pocket and handed it to me. When Saturday came the boss told me my wages would be ten shillings @ week inetead of eight shillings W. J. NEWLAND, HONESTY INCREASED HIS PAY FROM $2 TO 85. At fourteen years of age T was working in a printing office at $2.00 per week, My first raise came on my finding a ten dolar bill under my employer's desk on sweeping up in the morning, and returning tt to him. I did not know I wag to get @ reward, but I received % for the next week's saiary. T. FRED PPTERSIEN, Tottenville, N. Y. SHE DID EXTRA WORK “BE- FORE HOURS.” ‘When I was fifteen years of age I obtained a position as messenger in the velling department of a lars store at $3 per week. After @ month or so I began to take greater inter- aut in the work, Every morning I'd Jungle Tale ir Such Clothes! Mr. Léon to bis good wife one e sun was going ‘Author “ScVEN OAYS™ —— se | GUESS I will take @ snoose,” sald afternoon as down. when his grandfather found him in wwe shelter-house and gave him his chotcs olng back at once or reading med!- cine with him, “Oh, bring her up! curler, “I haven't been able to sleep on the back of my head for three weeks. Well, T curled her hatr she told me about Mise “I would not go to sleep now,” sald Mra. Lion, “for Mr. Elephant ls making a lot of notse over there, He may dte- turh you." for her and Bring her up!" nmers being be mid without looking around, “If still shut in her room, and how she'd| “Never mina Mr. Elephant,” replied ree won't stay unless he can play offered Mike an extra dollar to «ive " the friend in need, all right. But don't the white poodle @ Turkish bath—It be- Mee Tat 7 one: wine Shine Tam come after me if the whole blamed ing under the weather us to health--| Wed 0 ‘Then he atretched himeelf out and ar- ranged his beautiful mane eo that It would not get mussed up. Byo and bye Mister Jay Tird came how Mike had soaked the Hitle st for an hour in a tub of water, forgetting the sulphur, and it had come out a sort of mustard color, and how Miss Summers had had hysterics when aw It sanatorium swells up with mumps and faints at the sight of a p! u ‘That was Wednesday Things at the sanatorium were about the sitine on the surface, The wor crocheted and wondered what the nv house doc would be like, and the dipped him tn pining to bleach scap box—the floor was drafty— men gambled at the slot-machines and h n-or rather ‘her’ its name is wrapped tn ink with Played billiards andj grumbled at tho Arabella’ Mins Cobb said, “but all bands of brown fur on It, looking food and the management, and when iid was to make it mottled like an and perfectly hap) they weren't drinking spring wate ster egg. Everybody Is charmed. her bolled egg with a @poon. I took they were in the bar washing away ‘he ‘Phere were no dogs allowed while the them some books-—my Gray's Anatomy, taste of it. They took twenty minutes old doctor lived. Things were differ. and Jane Eyre and Molly Bawn, by The on the verandas every day Duchess, and the newspapers, of course, cixe and k the hous things were different,” T ase They were full of talk ut the at elghty, Senator Bigg limping over to heat the curl edding, and the suite the prince was ing, and Biews te how does, Mr. Carter get bringing over with him, and every now ul fay in tne aPringene And then @ notice would say that Misa le every time she h ut Gown ner handsnirrop Dorothy nings, the bride's young Was that day, I think, that 1 found th: Me Pin. dawn rien DendtpmTOr corer wet wpa ailil ‘A olen Auk wan Magazine with on fasting stu as if it had Seer Wednesday Upton Sinclair's artic wall t coming out unti sister's matd xt year, w. honor, hing on Mr. Dick'a goodness knows 2 to move out house, By working le story and ning his y, don't. te nit it, Minnie he exe ae much you stead eart «Company n 1 see T said slow Then tt wasn't coincidence about the mumps!" “Comivunded Aid bad thou,” be said Huet wiy kor two, ried It tu her A r edme of bas col with Rar fast on ibe A LooK- IN Wty Some Ferrans. EVEN GoTA ‘Miss Patty Prize of $25 for the best true account (200 words or less) of “How : Got My First Raiee.” take the covers off the counter and clean all around; then I would put the stands up and trim them, A few mornings the buyer saw me doing this, and one morning she called me over and askd) me how long I had heen there, I told her six months, ‘The next week [ wan called to the office and raised to stock girl with $ added to my salary. HE . MARNELL, 18 Calyer St., Brooklyn. SUCCEEDED IN PLEASING A CRANKY CUSTOMER. T started in @ large retail lumber company as @ stock ‘boy and to walt on custome s at @ salary of 8 per week. I was quick to learn and soom became familiar with my position ani the lumber and mili business. ‘When a customer would ask for @ certain moulding or door I knew just where to lay my hands on it, having Uttle system of my own, thereby giving satisfaction to the customer and eaving his time, There was one old customer who never could be pleased, not even by the foreman. He would come to me asking for door jama or sash or any material, Uf not in stock I would order it for him. I was called at last to the Superintendent's office ani com- mended for my ability toplease. I re ceived my firat raise of $1.50 and waa_ Promoted to assistant shipping clerk. GRORGE A. LINCOLN, ‘No, 9 Huguenot street, New Ro- ohelle, N. ¥. WHEN WORK WA6 HARD HE WORKEO HARDER. TI Avag glad to accept a job as plumber’s helper at %.60 per week. times was a little hard for didn’t grumble but went at ft 4 the dest I could. A month af doss's son came “Charley, we're giving you a ef balf a dollar,” and handed me an envelope containing a. BODNAR, 6 Rast Mh 8, New York, tor Childsen —By Farmer Smith—— Copyright, 1918, by The Prew Pubtishing (0, (The New Yor Brening Weld), along looking for mischief, Goce Ge spied Mr, Lion asleep. 5 “L guess it's Ume that fellow wele upt’* he exclaimed to himecif, “Chee cher—choop!* went Mr. Jay Bird, Léon jumped up eo quick he knocked Mre. Lion over, “Oh, pshaw!” jaughed Mrs, Léon, tect ‘ng up tn the trea, “Tt was only Mfr, Jay Bird eneesing.” “wi answered Mr. Lica, “Tm act used to ttle equeaky noless, They hurt my ears.” “Yes,” eaid Mra. Lion, “tt’p the things Wo are not used to that bother us.” ——— << with bitterness. “Minnie, something’: got to be done, and done econ. If you t the plain truth, Miss—er—Gum- mers and I used to be friends—and-- well ‘8 suing me for breach of prom- ise. Now for heaven's sake, Minnie, don't make a muss"—— Hut my knees wouldn't hold me IT dropped down in @ snow-drift and covered my face, CHAPTER XI. Miss Patty’s Prince. BAGGED myself back to the spring-house and dropped in front of the fire. What with worry and no sleep and now this new complication I was rday's aewspape: my eyes Mr, Pierce other side of the ing at the fire, Ho 4! 4 pipe between hig teeth, but ke Wasn't sinoking, and he had something his mouth he'd Lsaw him, » he saw I was T sald. ‘I don't t it's like waking Pierce, First I put a to nat was when I asked you to nigut, ‘Then [ went @ step lured as you may say, by * & crown or what- 3 just beyond, my And to-night lve got a~well, to« tim to the neck and yelling ipk death,” ver to where T sat before rit five agi cwlsted my head towand him ‘To-night-what?" he demanded, Ge be Conteh