The evening world. Newspaper, February 2, 1904, Page 12

_ TUESDAY EVENING, FEBRUARY 2, 1904, wt THE » EVENING » WORLD'S ablislied by the Press Publisting Company, No. & to 63 Park Row, New York. tntered at the Post-Office ut New York as Second-Ciass Mall Matter. VOLUME 44 —_——_.. fa 7 rhe Evening World First. , Number of columns of advertising in The he Grea The Most (Originally Drawn for The Evening World by Cartoonist Ed Flinn January 31, 1903.) a Evening World for 12 months, ending January 31, 1904. Pete al2 Zales Number of columns of advertising in The ol Evening World tor 12 months, ending January 31, 1903... INCREASE This record of growth was not equalled by any news- paper, morning or evening, in the United States. THE GAS TRUST CORNERED. The tests made by Dr Woodbridge Hall Birchmore, The World's expert, show that the deterioration of the| ‘ gas supply of New York has gone to greater lengthn than | } anybody has thought possible. It is not a matter of two! » ar three candle power out of twenty that fs in question —the shortage amounts to cutting the legal standard in two. It means that two burners must be used where one ought to be enough Nor {s this the worst. Coroner Scholer yesterday be- 4 gan the first of six inquests In casos of asphyxiation by Gas, and in addressing the jury he sald: ‘The peopie of the city of New York should rise up in their wrath and condemn the gas companies, Never in the history of the gas companies have so many deaths by asphyxiation len heard of as this winter. The number of deaths by dofective gas ts appalling. The first need in dealing with a situation of this) kind 1s publicity. The criminals must be compelled to) “ work in daylight, not in the dark or even by Consolidnted i Gaslight. That end can be attained by requiring daily | official tests, made public through the newspapers. After | that there ougitt to be some mora summary method of| punishing delinquencies than that of actions in court. The promptest and most effective proceedings would be} 4 through the customers’ bills. How would it do to provide that no bill could be collected from any consumer, public or private, unless a certificate of the Commissioner of Water Supply, Gas and Electricity showed that the aver- age quality of the gas throughout the month had been above the legal minimum? : ‘ Goy. Odell has announced through The Bvening 5 World that he will devise measures in concert with the leaders of the two houses of the Legislature to give the people of New York the relief they demand. Mayor Mc- Clellan promises the co-operation of every department of the city guverpment. Agninst. thia mass of official power, backed by an angry and determined public senti- ment, the Gas Trust will be as helpless as the Ice Trust was against a much less formidable combination a few years ago. q PUBLISH THE NAMES, The time allowed by Mayor McClellan to the man- egers of the nineteen theatres in Which nothing has been éone to provide for the safety of thoir audiences expires at midnight to-night. Those that remain obdurate will ‘be dealt with by the law, and they will find that the au- thorities have plenty of resources for dealing with their kind of criminals. But it is not necessary to wait for any unwinding of legal red tape. Let the Mayor make public the names of the deltmquent theatres, as he has said he will, and the People will do the rest. With such @ publication to- morrow morning a blight will fall upon to-morrow’'s matinees. This dramatic season has been bad enough financially at best. Let any manager picture the effect upon his box-office receipts of the appearance in the| © newspapers of an official notice that his theatre is un-| ® safe and that he has refused to make the alterations Necessary for the protection of his audiences. Unless the supply of gray matter in managerial crania is even shorter than the quality of most of this year’s plays would have given reason to suspect, we shall find to- morrow morning that the list of nineteen unimproved | €re-traps has shrunk to uone, Mr. How Cruet! | jee pOOOO: and Only Mr. 5000000 Cewee. : Important Litthe Man on Earth. Design Copyrighted, 1903, by The Ebening World. Peewee Expands Himself on the Spanking Proplem. s re) (anes! Tat Gil oF ee ad a ZS fav, Toorsi€, | CAN HARDLY EXPRESS MY SATISFACTION with THE IDEA OF REVERTING To THE Goop OLO METHOD OF SPANKING 'N OUR PUBLIC ScHoots! THE Good OLD TIMES! ITS HIGH TIMES THEY WERE DOING set) THING TO CURB THE WILD SPIRITS OF THESE PRESENT pay BRars! Tam a THOROUGH BELIEVER IN C. 3 THE MAXIM=SPARE THE) Rop, SPOIL} a THE f, PPBPDIEOOOIHOGHGG9O90O499D HYES! THE CHILD OF TooaY 1S TREATED WITH TOO MUCH 7 LENIENCY, WITH THE RESULT STHAT HE TRIES TO LORD IT {OVER MANKIND BEFORE HE '~ (HAS ATTAINED HALF HIS GRowTH!, D2 OTHERE 1S NOTHING LiKE A ¢ GOOD SAXNKING TO HAMMER (i THE ABRo cant conce OuT OF THEM Ai Fa How L {MERCILESS 039000 WHEN WE ALL FLY. While the big airships described in the last sun-| LETTERS, fay World Magazine are going through thelr paces at St. Louis M. Santos-Dumont may be seen circling about QUESTIONS. the course in a little aerial “runabout,” which he {s ANSWERS. bringing over for his personal convenience. The aerial runabout is a fascinating idea. It suggests the easy mastery of the atmosphere. It hints of a coming time | when every man mey be bis own transportation com- Hours for Sleep. To the Editor of The Evening World: What Ume should a girl of fourteen pany. years go to bed, and how many hours’ If the navigation of the air were always t ep should sho get? 1,1. M. y8 to be con- A child of that age should not sit up in 0) F 7 fined: to operations on a Inrge scale, we might not find|iater than 9 P.M. and should get trom things much more satisfactory than they are now, “We|nine to ten hours’ sleep a night in a should probably have letters in the papers denouncing the Eyrie Company for letting its schedules go to Pieces in stormy weather and asking the Public Dia- service Corporation uf New Jersey why it did To th not warm | Ita cars, But when anybody can hitch up his own little! flying runabout in his own front yard and skim over | to'business in his own time the corporations will be so| "One of thes busy offering temptations to customers that there will |9F “Ove of the Is there any be no occasion to nag them into doing their duty, everywhere in the well-ventilated room. 1732; Died, 1799, itor of The Evening World In what year was Washington born and in what year did he die? The Former In Correct. Db. No. | To the EMitor of The Evening World Which of these sentences Is correct it ms reads as follows,’ items read as follows?” holt that ts observed United States? F. EB, @. Ree rersiest, Words on Record—If the two little words lady Should Bow Firat, ° Boca ee dontare ni oN 2 WAE Contig thousands of mill-| To the Bilvor of The Evening World: REA e s eer aie fhousar of lives, Kip.| Is it correct for a gentleman to recog- Ree ta Coronet neuen ash ollar essay on} nize a lady first when meeting on the p eut.-Gi ee, of Missouri, wilt| t, or should the lady recognize the vt erase to attract attention as examples of high-priced| gentleman first? J.P. 3. +.) language. | For Veatibuled Trolley Cars, ———__—__. | To the Editor of The Evening World I indorse tho tdea of vestibuling the in Democrats.—Col, Guffey, Pennsylvania, as Chairman of the Democratic Nation: Committec? Let us see, Republican majority in Fenn- vania at tho last election, 268,603. Democratic vote nt othe same clection, 25,163. Republican majority, 23,429 in ‘exe ithe Democratic total vote, Pennsylvania used +40 elect Democratic Governors and Senators occasionally H&ht It nut be just a well for Co}. Guffey to help the p tate to get back into that condition before to rum a national campaign? aced. cars, fronts of trolley men from cold think not only is the motorman In dan- ker under the present systgm, but the lives of the passengers are also men- cars to protect motor- I go still further, 1 ‘The severe weather of the past therefore a crime, *) month was often enough to tnenpact- tate motormen for work while guiding I think it murderoys, simply ‘ Mra. A. M. wouLo You PRIZE PEWEE HEADLINES for o-day, $1 paid for each: No. 1— CHARLES V. B. KONZELMAN, 16 West 102d street, New York City; Will the ‘writers of the Fudge Editor! als, “Why Chickens D> Not Smoke” and “Story 0: the Oyster Polyxamus” please send thelr names and addresses, as the @ i bittle Tragedies Strikingly Told in Four Words THATS RIGHT, You BRAT! i THERES NOTHIN’ Like A Goop SPANKIN’ TER HAMME! (THE ARRYGAN®T CONCEIT eae Out Tp Give AMiLLION 2 DOLLARS TO BE A SCHooL’ TEACHER, FOR ABouT FIVE minutes! TD Show = EVENING FUDGE Dr. Liv. O. Worst says that red-headed people have leas brains thon dark Do Red-Headed People Have Less Brains Than Dark-Haired Ones? Do: You Ever Think of It? Read ‘What Dr. Liv. O. Worst Saya, melts the brains from bgbyhood to manhood about 500 Gramstt Tako a Crab for Instance: before It Is cooked Its brain weighs: 7 Grams: after It ts cooked AND BECOMES RED It welahs only 12-5 Grams! THINK OF THATI! Dr. Liv. O. Wurst also warns everybody against the uss of RED INK. as tho rays will melt the brains of even dark-hairbd ‘people unless thetr constitution ts very strong! Also think of that! Even a Bull loses his brains entirety when ne sees anytming “Think of f. and If we think we have mada you think we have also mado you guess. KEEP THINKING AND GUESSING!! Add a IIltle cream and sugar to this editorial ana use ft as a breakfast food MR. PEWEE'S CAMPAIGN OF EDUCATION. W. C. W. Child, Structural and Ornamental Iron Works, 1123 Broadway, New York, Jan, 29, 1901, No. 2—MASTER DUDLEY BUR- NETT, Boonton, N. J.; No. 3—L. M. To the Editor of The Evening World: T incloso an editorial for the Evening Fudge. I have been very much amused by the two Evening Fudge editorials that have already appeared. They take off tho editorials In the “Original Evening Fudge" even more clev- CRANE, Columbus Cafe, 349 West than the headlines of the Evening Fudge take off those of the “Original Fudge.” Mr, Power ts conducting 1 campaign of education, and if he makes 59th street, New York City. people wake up-to the absurdities uf tre “Original Fudge" he will do a great deal of good. Yours very truly, W. E. BARNEY. . ' latter were prisiald. COUNTRY EDITOR'S COURAGE. "John," ald the editor's ‘wife, “what| would vou do if you discovered a! said Mr. Honpeck, ‘% burglar tn “Wel P89O$9$009$00600009$08-00000000060 Se OUT CRI LAUGHABLE. DON'T YOU VHINK 80? ‘Some of the proverbs about us A SEQUENCE. FOF-PDDHDDIFOOSD9O9-H99999099OH $9-06-0-060-008-06.990-000 HOME # MAGAZINE # Keeping the Saloons Open On Sundsya b6 SEE,” sald the Cigar Store Man, “that Frits ] Lindinger anrfounces that the saloon-keepers elected McClellan.” “There is where Lindinger’s backward view {is twiste ed,” replied the Man Higher Up. “The rumsellers had no more to do with McClellan’s election than the peanut peddlers’ union did. The people of New York City: elected George McClell*n because trey were not satise fled with the Low administration. {ft they are not sate isfled with the McClellan administration they will change; it two years from now just as easy as breaking a dollar bill. “The result of the last election has had the effect of lining the saloon-keepers and the clergymen who keep in the newspapers shoulder to shoulder on the propor sition of keeping the thirst parlors open on Sunday) Politics makes strange bedfellows, and if there ever waa: stranger combination on the same political bed tham the Liquor Dealers’ Association and the preachers is politics history has failed to set it down. “There seems to be an impression among those whe are engaged in uplifting the community that the excise question {is the only question in municipal politica ‘These people seem to think that the whole question of good government in New York revolves around the sae loon. They have got the idea that all they have to do is to have a bill passed in the Legislature allowing the ipeople of New York City to vote on Sunday opening an@ that the voters will knock each other down getting te the polls to cast their ballots in favor of the free an@ unrestricted traffic in booze seven days in the week. “If a bill putting the Sunday opening proposition up to the people of this city gets through the Legislature ithe result of the vote is going to paralyze the men who !:hink they are wise to public sentiment. New ' Yorks jdon’t want open saloons on Sundays for ten hours op three hours or a minute. . { “A mighty small percentage of the population of this town visits saloons on Sunday, but the sentiment of play rules and those who don’t care to drink on Sunday, but believe that there should be a chance for those wha do care to, are’ strong enough to swing the game a1 way they want. “Anybody who has ea Sunday thirst nowadays cam |appease it. The law permits saloons to be open on Sune} day under certain restrictions. What the people have/ kicked about Is the playing of favorites on the pai’ af! the police in administering the law. What the people: want is protection for a rumseller who obeys the law and the boots for the rumseller who disobeys it.” . “It {8 a flerce situation,” remarked the Cigar Store Man. * 7 3 “It is,” agreed the Man Higher Up. “If the polio can't make the gin mill men obey a law that compels them to close all of Sunday haw can they compel obedi- ence to a law that allows gin mills to open part of Sunday?” The Girl Who Laughs. By Nixola Greeley-Smith. 'F we lived in the good old days of fairy godmothers and there came to every woman onco in her life a being from the wonder world who bade her choose which of all the fairy cow- ers she would have for her own, there fs no doubt that the great majority of womankind would select what a poet christens the fatal gift of beauty. But whether they would be wise in doing so is another matter. Surely of ail the dowers of nature, in- tellectual or physical, the gift of laugh- ter is most to be desired, and of all the girls she who possesses it is most en- viable. ev — . The girl who laughs—she who seeks and sees in everys thing the little gleam of humor that’ is sometimes as hard to find as the fire In a blond woman's eyes or the sunlight in a brunette’s hair is of all women best armed against the world and against herself. Neither love nor men can harm her while she laughs. For in whatever the emotional cris{s which bring the pills of the self-interest of men and women Into conflict, she {s thrice armed Who possesses a sense of humor. No rfitter how serious a woman may be in her refusal of him, a man does not despair. If he persists and her ear- nestness changes to anger he hopes, and when anger fades In the white heat of tears, he fecls that the battle is won, But if she laughs at him lightly, amlably, persistently, he knows that the Jig is up. But it {s not alone in the handling of unwelcome suitors that the gift of laughter is invaluable. For it ts the woman who laughs at a man even though she loves him, and he knows she loves him, who wins out in the game of hearta in which most women lose, * To be sure there are many women who believe that the only sure way to get anything from a maa is to cry for it, and {f they want but little and don't want that little long, this may be true. But the tyranny of tears 1s of necessity a very brief one, for we know a continuous dropping of water or brine—will wear away stone and men’s hearts, which are mostly made of it. But laughter {s like a fountain bubbling up and around the rocky surfaces and keeping them fresh and sweet, Laughter is the surest weapon not only tn love but also in the ‘ti dies of grief, which it sometimes causes, . \ The women who go down hysterically before disaster tne variably come up smiling and in short order. Like Hamlet's: mother, they look over the funeral baked meats which lates furnish forth the second marriage feast— * “With one auspicious and one dropping eye In equal scale weighing delight and dole,’* But to the woman who does not wear her heart upon her sleeves for daws or men to peck at, the gift of laughter ta the supremest weapon, And she who smiles while her heart breaks fulfils the finest traditions of all races and all times, that which made the solctsm of the ancients, the stolla. courage of the Briton, the nerve of the American, the “ of the Chinaman and the yet unclassified Instinct prompts the wounded animal to crawl into the silence and the dark to die. aE EES MIDWINTER REPENTANCE. HE frosted window rattles in the casement, T The wind is howling shrill adown the. street, ‘The watcr, pipes are frozen in the basement, And so af@ the provisions we would eat, And, oh, ft fills my soul with blank amazement To think we ever murmured at the neat. To think that perspiration once annoyed us, . That prickly heat had power to us pain, That the use of ices, hammocks, fans, employed us And blessings all were given us in_vain, If a woman's * means “yes And a woman's "yes" means “I was matried to that man once,” said the first Chidago wom can| ‘To Mr, Murryat? Tne fen! Way, po re ridioulo| ‘Then happy the man who her “‘yes' the house?" [ova As, replied “We, s editor, “It would that one that says ‘thet he on, hand 1088 was I. the other. ‘ ‘on how invch money be had! - Sy fr A audSts "Soitadtutlom.”® MA) shag, taixe he cradle ies te head that anf who, knows when he knows per! | “You don't Sy, Were you before or Oh, may our guardian angels all avold us Should we ever be found guilty thus again. 2 CORA M. W. GREENL@aF,