The evening world. Newspaper, January 12, 1904, Page 12

ean tot fark Row, New York. Entered at the Post-Office at New York as Second-Class Mail Matter. _. NOLUME 44. NO. 16,484. GOOD FROM EVIL. "The Chicago that was burned in 1871 was mostly ‘Pallt of wood. It probably would have stayed of wood ~ to a large extent for the next fifty years tf a colossal talamity had not cleared the ground and shaken up) the public mind. After that the fire limits were .ex- fondea and the new Chicago became as maasive as the SASSY SUE 2 PDEOOSSE bid one had been filmsy. _/ The Troquois Theatre’ disaster has had an equally "Wholesome effect. The victims of the orime that draped | Piicago in mourning have not died in vain. The! Rew theatre ordinance prepared by the Aldermanic) pommittes is the most thoroughgoing in this com-| ley, if not in the world. It requires fireproof passage- bre ways outside of theatres, solid brick walls between She stage und the auditorium, steel proscenium arch,| ¢ Steel curtain, red lights over exits, fireproof scenery / gaits at each house, and double systems of water pro- Seotion. ‘With New York setting a high standard of theatri- tal eafety in the East and Chicago in the West, there Will be a wholesome bracing of the conditions in the Whole country. j SOME PLAIN HUMAN NATURE. People who complain that the papers contain noth- but illustrations of the baseness of human nature jd read the accounts of the wreck of the steamer erman off Cape Hatteras on Christmas night. by icy seas, the Walkerman began to go down. boats were lowered, the women going first. The fic waves proved too much for one boat, and it had fhe lightened. There was nothing to throw over- ard, so the mate in command sald that somebody Would have to get out. Three sailors volunteered to bump into the biting sea. They strapped on life- and plunged in. Cakes of ice were floating | eatabai and one of them struck one of the ewim- -Wmers in the chest and broke three ribs. The hands pnd feet of the same man were frozen. In this con- “veo the three men kept afloat unt!! morning, when they were picked up. ‘These simple sailors did not appear to know that were heroes. They just did thelr duty, and the with three caved-in ribs and the frozen hands hand feet told of his experiences in as matter-of-fact a Way as if he had beon describing a trip to a water- tront boarding house. j granted that every now bridge must ber of lives from “caisson disease,” or are we going to try to find some better device than offering men ay) F99GIHI-9G 9ST GE 99-00 i hna fittings, two firemen in charge of apparatus and) > $10 a day to commit suicide? It nns been suggested ‘that if men can dive under water in armor they could | @o the same in compressed air. Why not? i i “KNICKERBOCKER, THE BILLIONAIRE. According to the new assessments the wealth of New York City amounts to the tremendous total of over nine billion dollars, or nine times the bulk of the indemnity paid to Germany by France. Of this $4,756,910,359 is feal estate, which has heen increased $1,658,000,000 under he full-value assessment policy of the Low administra- ton. Perhaps thet inflation may have some traceable a onnection with the election returns. Personal property ig Is listed at $4,548,152,672, but when the swearing-off 3 machinery gets to work that will melt away “like snow pon the desert’s dusty face," which, “lighting its little “i hour or two, is gone.'” @m Addicks Flea-Bite—The receiver of the Bay State Gas Company ts to sue J. Edward Addicks for $4,000,000, if alleged to have been illegally spent. Addicks smiles, Naturally; for what 1s $4,000,000 to » corporation that has printed a billion dollars’ worth of stock? Se | THE PASSING AND THE ENDURING. | “Governments are ephemeral, journalism {s eternal,”! mied Emilio Castelar, Spanish journalist, republica patriot, orator and President. Because governments are | ephereral a Bourbon monarchy authorizes the erection of a monument to this republican in Madrid. Because} Journalism is eternal Horace Porter, the representative of a nation of journalists, forms a committee and so- Ucits subscriptions from Americans. | Castelar. it is true, propounded his motto while, keeping a snug billet open for himself in case his re- Pe. public should fail him, but the truth it announces is ‘profound, Journalism has grown and strengthened) while France has rin the gamut of governments.| Journalism flourished mightily while Italy struggled )- for independence. A government recognizes how : ephemeral it is and agrees to put a stop to a threat- ened massacre at the suggestion of eternal journalism. © Certainly, if Jefferson were living now he would see} no reason to withdraw his opinion that newspapers | without a government would be better than a govern- 4 “ment without newspapers. Am Opaque Atmosphere. low that most of the offices i have been distributed, may we invite the Mayor and/ the Health Commissioner to take a look at the atmos- phere of New York? If they are in doubt as to what ie they see, let them consult an expert from Pittsburg. 3 He will tell them that it 4s soft coal smoke, and then Sa helr own sense of duty will tell them what is to be| i done next. | | INJUSTICE TO A FINANCIER. “Mr. Alexander Johnson, of Brooklyn, promised to Da ae $ “Say, Boss! if}ou keep up them bars How'm | a-goir’ to get the cars? $98996464694-0486060040 OOM The Girl Who |: The Important Mr. Pee Put o Fe Is a Tin-Horn Sport. é ¢ By Nixola Greeley-Smith. Sab AE E have all met the girl who is a W tin-horn sport. And consequently we all know that there are two kinds of her, the one who is really a very nice, harmless little girl, but who, blowing very loud and long on her tin horn, would ratner be thought almost anything else, and the other, who, i1 you take her word for it, does not know there is any such a thing asa tin horn in the world and would not blow on {t for anything. No matter how limited his acqquaint- ance with young women may be, almost everybody can recall having met each of these types at one time or another and perhaps having been equally taken in by the nice little girl’s blatant im! tation of the woman sport and the more worldly wise young person's demureness Sometimes, too, one of these in the evolution other, and the girl who at eighteen or twenty laughs un- restrainedly when should give the impression that does not know,"'| and never could understand, develops | into the prude of thirty, whose trained stupidity ts so very much on the alert > 2900.0-0- a *. Oe u 2 G0 > $3- DOD. for a double meaning that she is apt| ® to greet a casual reference'to her neigh- | 2 bors’ twins with “Really, Mr. Blank, | { I don't understand what you mean.” || @ |§ Now, perhaps one of these yuuwix wom-| & on Is as objectionable as the other, tur| % to the average man the air of overdone ignorance and that of excessive suphis-| ‘ tication are equally distasteful. But it ts generally true that the wom- an who may be styled a conversational Anarchist confines her anarchy to con- versation. And, though she may wave) ‘ the red flag in her talk, it 1s lable to} ¢ make a speedy and disconcerting ap- pearance in her cheeks at the first al tempt to take udvantage of it, While the lady of the milk-white flag, on the contrary, makes one reallze at times that white Ix the color of innocence and of} { the truce that admits of parley. q ‘There are, of course, many well-poised | 2 young women who neither are nor wish) » to appear wiser or more ignorant of the| « world than the should be. And pe haps more of the two extreme types! flourish in the downtown bustness world than In the most rest fed soclal mosphere above Forty-second street Generally the girl who steps from the narrow limits of her own home Into an office is charmed by the easy freedom| © which prevails there, And even if there | © are sometimes things about it that would have shocked and perhaps dis- tressed her a vear before, she does not appear to notice them. For not for worlds would she have a of her dis- eriminating masculine assoctates dis- By the Creator of “Sunny. Jim” gw Atthe Turnstile! “Help! Murder! Help! you sky-blue brat, Dod gast your gall! you’ve squashed tpe flat! wee, the Great Little Man .& He Thinks He Knows How to Solve the Difficult Servanf-Girl Problem. Design Conyrrahted, 1903, by The Eventing World. OH, BY THE way, MR PEEWEE, Wouro! HER Nerice? THE IDEA OF ANY Bopy COMPLAINING OF THE SERVANTS! I1's TOO ABsuRD! [Have MADE A SPECIAL STupy OF THIS SERVANT. | Gin, PROBLEM~ THE TRUE WAY TO HANOLE THEM 15. WITH FIRMNESS— | Don HUMOR THEM GWENDOLYN MS Goocan! You HEAR ME! You Scuttion ! Depart FROM THESE PREMISES THIS VERY INSTANT | Do Nor Ue DELAY; lorr SQUIRT- GUN — TLL-- pe KITCHEN FER! GOSO9OO9O9O004 Design Copyrighted, 1903, by The Press Publishing Company (The New York World), “Never mind. you ticket-chopper: (i Sassy Sue’sa right smart honper' pws Fou | (Nornine weurnl__| EE, neu La ee GIVE ME. MORE. PLEAS~ URE THAN To DEMON, STRATE How THOR= OUGHLY PRACTIC:, ABLE AND EFFECTIVE MY IDEAS on THUS Subsect ARES AH! THIS 1S A PRouD Mo- MENT- 4 | TRIUMPH! The Fine Art of. Tax Dodging in New York. reinarked the Cigar Store Man. “The as- sessors only boosted me five hundred bucks, and I etood ready to be tilted a thousand.” “It’s # cinch you'll always be poor,” commented the Man Higker Up. “You are destined to travel all the resi of your life in the class of men who think that when they spend $4 for a meal it fs an event. How do you expect ever to have boodle to spraddle all ove: the layout if you stand for your taxes? “Why don’c you follow the example of our dis- tinguished and philanthropic millionaires and swear off your taxes? The high lights of the business com- © munity are rehearsing their left-handed oaths now. 2 Pretty soon they will go down to: the Tax Com- & missioners and make affidavits that they haven't got e personal property enough to flag.a hand-car with. $ “You never heard a millionaire’s oath questioned. $ You neyer heard any subsequent tempest of Protest © when a man with a mansion on Fifth avenue which % is valued at $250,000 or so gets up and calls upon his Creator to witness that the assessw Is a lar. You don't notice any investigation committees when an emi- yy GOT off pretty easy on my taxes this year,” IWELL Done 4 residence cost him about as much as it would set an average citizen back for the construction of a bouduly for a horse, i “Maybe you are Mr, Wisenheimer at that. If you went down to swear off your piking little personal tax they would probably call you Mr. Peewee and fan you out the back door. But you ought to make a stagger at it at that. Maybe some eminent leader in business rectitude would get stuck on you, if you swore bard $|enough; take you t» one side and make you an offer ® ito become his official perjurer. You can see from re- cent happenings that perjury has become a pastime in finance, “The millionaires go down to the Commissioners and swear off their taxes, and you and the other pikers pay yours and keep the city treasury from becoming the home of a vacuum. The millionaires who own real estate make their tenants pay the taxes, and after they have sworn off the tax on their personalty— or made a fake move to another State to avoid it-- ®|the expenses ot keeping New York in motica are defrayed by the pour sloys who have aothing." 4 “I see that one Of the pupils in the Rockefeller ® |Sunday-schvol lest Sunday said it was wrong for a PRIZE PEEWEE HEADLINES for to-day, $1 each—No. 1, FLORENCE McKAYE, No. 1604 Lexington avenue, New York City; No. <, A. H. SLA-3|Trich man to dodge his taxes,” said the Cigar Store Man. cover that she is not a “good fellow.” | TER, No. 2225 Fifth avenue, New York City; No. 3, ARTHUR HILL, No. 750 Wendover avenue, Bronx; No. 4, Mrs, R. BELL No. 1104 Washington ? “So I understand,” answered the Man Higher Up. ‘There thay be other women in business with her who have been downtown eight or ten years, and who confine their communications with the men they meet there to the yea, yea and nay, nay es- sential to the office routine. But she makes up her mind that they are “some | old maids," as, indeed, they not Infre- | quently are, ‘ One of these girls who had not known six young men in her life before she | entered a downtown office, but who, | despite the handicap, was ao fascinated by the tn-horn sport role that she joy- lly proceeded to give a decidedly araa- eur imitation of it and to marvel at} the alr of sedate aloofness that dls- tinguished a good-looking fellow-worker | of perhaps thirty, whose frappe manner | was an office Joke, until one day the frozen goddess asked her to dinner, Among the evening's surprises were street, Hoboken, N. J. 92-94 004004* 036-56 sbittle Tragedies Strikingly Told in BY THE wooo] PILE WHEN YOU FINISH a hospitable bottle of Scotch and 4 box |” of cigarettes stamped with the young jell. —_ pay $100 for the use of $60 for five days, giving a bunch ihe © when the lender tried to realize on the collateral it farmed ont to be an unmarketable asset. Johnson was arrested and indicted for grand lar- A BY. Vhy this unaccustomed severity? Suppose Mr. John- Ree bad formed himself into a company and borrowed 000,000, issuing $10,000,000 of bonds for the amount. fed by a second mortguge on half a dozen piles‘of i rs ) would anybody have thought of arresting hini| tered later in the when he defauited in his payments? 2 ry m committed the blunder of operating on| bn abit De 1 scale, but that does not alter the fact} Alt of which, apropos of it he, ‘@ thief, but a financier, 92 rh ci ) of pawntickets as security. The debt was not paid, and| At. and a decidedly vinous dinner in a i ! | Broadway r | claret the Thereupon | ided to her hostess some details of an Woman's monogram, both of which | ® stood open on the centre table of the| estuurant. Ov bottle of unger girl ingenuously con- essentially harmless flirtatio: haps gushed rather indiser: hero of tt, only to be met with the crushing exclamation: “Why, my dear, you ought not to know such a creamuve. i'm surprised that you let him talc to you,” Which dampened her cnthusi- asm far more than if it nad been ut- vening, alter she had seon a middle-aged New York Judge strike a light for his fifth cigaretts on the frozen goddess's shoe. and per- tly over the tin-horn |” rts, proveswell Abthing, QB Dy ereally proves} “Some day some one of thoce Rockefeller pupils is going to shoot off his mouth and find himself disliked.” English as She Is Wrote, The following letter was received by the manager of a plantation store In Hawail: “HONOLUL IL, Oct. 2, 198. Dear Sir—Here, I am going to disclose with your honor, by a few drops of Ines, “Tam havitg had not yet seen your face, but the hearing |of your reputwole name had alrendy reached to my ear. | “During the last few days I had learned by the advertise. {ment of Hawalt Shinpo (Japanese pfinting office) It was #ald that you are wanting to,pply a Japanese clerk in your plan- Uon-store; by this caporsunity to employ me w'th your favor in that situation, and I have no object in wa 1 “I am having high-school education in bota orient and !Dceldent. Good exoertment are prnetised at Japanese mer- {cantile house in this city. (Age 20), j ‘89 1 am expecting to your replication, Address P, 0, | ood TA: TAY LAoONW SORRY, BUT TLL MISS My TRAIN IF fl You FORGOT ABOUT THAT wood Nou PROMISED bony HURRY 3 3 e Box 881, Now I have nothing more to describe, and { must aak you to velleve mo to be your faithful servant. Respect- fully yours, J. KIMURA.” Tt wiil be seen that the Ha:vailan hish school ie doing a noble service for the honorable English language. 26000246 Pointed Paragraphs.. A woman is seldom able to ses the point to her husband Jokes, 1f a man fis not vain We ts apt to suffer from the vanity of others, Some of the heaven-made matches seem to have been | tipped tn the other place, When a girl is chummy with her mother she’ can manage to get along pretty well without a chaperon, ‘ After arguing with a man for half"n hour a woman in- variably says: ‘Now, why can't you. be sensible?” Women have a sympathetic liking for cats because the ee o latter always seom ill at case when there is a man around, Durtng her courtship a girl wonders what takes the place eb oeeseseeooos, doesn't care much what 4 ts—Chicago 3 of marrtage in heaven, but after being married a year ghe | | $