The evening world. Newspaper, December 17, 1903, Page 14

by the Press Publishing Company, No. 63 to @ © Park Row, New York. Entered at the Post-Office at New York as Second-Class Mail Matter, NO. 16,487. THE LONG TUG OVER. it Iast the Cutan tooth has been extracted from the matorial jaw. It has not been an exhibition of pain- dentistry, but now that the operation is over it is to be hoped the patient will feel better. | The housekeepers of the United States may expect a ghd shipping will be considerably stimulated. Our im- ©. plied promise to Cube has been Kept, and ‘we are |) Morally, as well as materially, refreshed. ‘The only thing to regret is the wanton folly by we have bound ourselves not to reduce our duties for five years. Senator Aldrich himself, ‘Veader of the high protectionist Senatorial trust, that those duties are too high. Then why they not be reduced? What excuse can any Senator give to his constituents for binding the eountry by a pledge not to reduce them? 7 There is one comfort. This preposterous pledge ap- Hes Oily to our foreign trade. It does not bind us to ‘up the tariff against our own possessions. The “thing in Order {s free. trade with the Philippines. tte likely that within the next five years our tropical ands, Cuba, Louisiana and our beet-growing States “Melp for Rutler.-The calamity that has Vefailen fever- stricken Butler is hardly less crushing, in proportion to yy the size of the place, than the flood at Galvestun. The Vy Relief Committee appeals through The World for $75,000. ‘Phin paper will be glad to receive and forward any money contributed to ighten the gloom of Butler's black Christ- mas. LOOK BEFORE YOU BLOCK. - re ‘The Democratic Senators who are proposing to block ©) Phe Panama Treaty by a solid party vote under caucus n are hugging the delusion that they are building ® valuable campaign issue, Before they commit them- i@s.too far they may profitably consider two or three For instance: No party has ever won a Presi- tial election on a platform of pure obstruction. Sena- Gorman might strike a noble attitude and say that } conduct of President Roosevelt and Secretary Hay nded his moral sense, but could he be sure that this ould reconcile the people of the United States to the of the Panama Canal? Again, it has been repeatedly arged and widely believed that the rejection of the Hay-Herran Treaty by the Colombian Senate was due to influence exerted upon Senators by the American ontinental railroads. How would the Democratic ty enjoy itself in a campaign in which it would have “tO be continually on the defensive against a similar tation? tg Finally Remedied.—The frionds of Gen. Woot, headed by ge Beoretary Root. protest that thelr favorite Is the victim © of an injustice bécause a garbled version of the testimony fel 4 before the Senate Committee on Military Affairs has been KS given to the public, If that bo true the remedy Is in the "+ hands of the General's eupporters. They control the committee, and they can have it publish its full proceed- : ah THE NEXT SUBWAY. The West Side Rapid Transit Association has been 3tganized to help along the development of New York's fransportation system by securing a subway for the occ!- déntal slope of Manhattan Island from Fifty-ninth street ‘Withe Battery. Nobody who has given any study to the it problems of this city needs to be told that the els already under way are only the barest beginning ‘of the system we really need. The Rapid Transit Com- ‘w@iission fully recognizes that fact. Even the more ex- yended plans of Chief Engineer Parsons fall far short of meeting our full requirements. A new tunnel on the ‘West side is an urgent necessity, not only as far as Fifty- th street but all the way to Harlem. So is orfe on east side. And when we get those there will be room for plenty more. z “THE CARDINAL’S VENGEANCE. + fwho would not be a stockholder in the Bank of Spain, > prospectively the richest institution in the world? In 1008 the legacy of $10,000 left on deposit by the late Car- . Herrero y Espinosa for “the first Spanish General ing in United States territory with an army suffi- tlently strong to avenge the defeats of Cuba and the Philippines” will amount to $505,051, if compounded at “per cent. In 2103 it will be $25,507,687. In 2253 it will “ie $9155,351,578, and Madrid wi!] be the financial centre bthe universe. In 2303, only three hundred years from the present time, {t will reaci $65,064,337,059, and all R Spain wil be able to knock off work and live on tue “PBterest of its money. Then, indeed, will Manila and ‘be avenged in the most charming and charac- ristical'y Spanish manner. THE NASSAU STREET BAZAAR. ‘The plan of turning Nassau street into an arcade jas enthusiastically welcomed by the merchants on taat 4 streat a footway in ‘ts whole width. Narrow and | with aspha‘t, it invites the pedostrians who are ded off the sidewalks. If it were turned into a giass- ered arcade, barred to wheeled traffic, it would be one je sigtits of the city. It would be a bazaar, a section nent world’s fair, in which people could stroi! op to shop, protected from the weather. Edward femy said that in an advanced civilization one sta- f Of little portable umbrel'as for the individual ‘Phe arcade is the realization of this idea. Its Milan, in Paris and in Londov would be ——- Sirl picked up in the street, unable “known language, and a Greek who: from Bilis Island because he will y net tobe deported—these ane two! Men owen -probioms pre-| and His Letter to Santa Claus. THE » EVENING # WORLD'S » G FZ Now WOODEN DAT JIGGAH YO’! DAS HIM ALL RIGHT — AN DAS MY_BILLY-Do HE Aaa READ HOME The Coon K SAY, SANTY, DIS AM A, REEL SPRISE~ J LEMME EXPLAIN LITTLE DIXIE, 'SAY, I GUESS DIs’LL DO DE BUSNESS @SPZVERHOO® perceptible réduction in their sugar bills, and our trade DEGLPVHLDHGOGGOGHS FFF HHIS IVI GBLVGIGIH HOOF 94 Why Mr. Sixfoot Falls in Love with | Miss Peewee. Great Little Man. with a Cuckooxlsck Whicn ne Buys tor Mss Sikfoot r, Peewee, the His ibr.aling ndventure he Important M HOW DOES THIS ( STRIRE You THIS MAKES OF NOISE. WHAT LITTLE BOYS LIKE. | < Nixola Greeley-Smith (Granddaughter of Horace Greeley.) NICE CLOCK. ORIGINAL. Evening World's comical Mr. Pee- wee, And, whether in pictures or the big little man is un doubtedly amusing, especially when fe walks abroad with witom he has an unfortunate propensit But what about danty Miss Peswee, the important little ne important ttle sister and the fasclna- tion she undoubtedly exercises over the mately Miss Sixfoot's dig brother, Mr. Sixfoot? They may be seen arm inarm any day in the week, and yet nobody to fall In love. Mr. Poewse's sister is frequently just as her distinguished ‘brother. She has quite aa many views | ‘end she airs them with an assurance of manner and @ finality of tone equal to But while Miss Sixfoot 1s regro- nented aa suffering @ dally dsenchant- ‘ment at the hand owing to some ca r miniature lover, rophe due to his good, amiable Mr, foot listens with undisguised rapture to the pearls of wisdom fadling from little Miss Peewee's lips, the while his strong right arm and his heroic size keep her secure from jostling crowds and jangling OOTSIE Cant FORGET ME.,wiTH THIS ON HER MANTEL- WHAT YOU WANT. TUST WAIT Hat Hal EVEN Another advantage which’ Miss Peewee THE BIRDS KNOW ME a haa over her brother Is that she Is al- ways quite sure that her giant loves her ‘better for being Iittle, standing Milas Sixfoot's many consolin JUST WHAT while, notwith- SF9OVSH99O6-54G9-99000O9 $ wondering !f ahe would not really pre him to be tall. It Js the fashion to say that blg me Ike little women, and big women little men, but Is the latter half of the pro; sition true, save on the gener that If you enn’t get what you what you can get? For Miss Sixfoot’s admirers are neur- Iy always in the Peewee class, and #1 can only exercive the feminine prer ss ative of choosing anong tho men who offer themselves. tall man or even a height loves a very way admire tho girl wno ¢ er to shoulder with him, at her aymmetry, marvel at her stat tli- But it is the girl whose daint head must tlt” upward wien she looks him In the eyes that he falls in love with. Many a man tells himself that hi idoal woman must be of stately heigh And he may indeed fail In love with her. of her Inches or lack of them hao abso- lutely nothing to do with tt, The most charming Inckleht In Ty Gentleman from Indiana whose {deal is of the tall, stately order, comes suddenly upon the living realization of his dreams yni| 2 exclaims as he notes ner scant 5 fest “Why, I always thought you were tall! Some of the Best Jokes of the Day. PLACING HIM. “ves, Tim @ Western man, myself." I've never been West, but to go next year to the St. is rareiy that After Much Persuas on She Finally Gets What She Wants. NOVEL-READING NE ae 4% we al wt a HEY, cHiMM pe mizz.eToe! ay Tm UNCER fag TM Good! | may be worth seeing, but be in it with thet— how are things tn Chica; Fhiludeiphia Press, A PARADOX. “I think the contrariest mau I knw," #ald Uncle Jerry Peobles, “is my broth: He's a Populist contrary enough, the he keeps his face sha' I wish To DENY) THE REPORT Mat Gitie Bowwow 18 ANY RELATION nd that's bein’} ¢ OPTIMISTIC. “I've quit smokin’,' centally smaehing said Casey, acci- 1s pipe aa he came] 4 Suvy umbrella .r a whole tcwn would take the place “I hope I am," BETTER USE FOR IT. Little Rastus—Mannny, Miscah Swell- y CZ, AN ADEA EDEDADDADLTETS F 999 9PCOCTOHOOS2008 19904 PHY DOs DRED ® PS Reform Needed in Xmas-Gift Business, a person js always broke coming on Christmat “I know what’s the matter with you,” re+ torted the Man Higher Up. ‘You've been doing some second-story work on the Old Jokes' Home. This scream about being broke at the approach of Christmas is frescoed with green mould.- The trouble with the average man js that he frames up a diamond orgie of gifts on a peanut income and gets cold feet when he sees the price list. “The Christmas hand-out thing is overdone, at that. It has got to a stage where we think we ought to give something to everybody we ever called by their firss names. The old times when you could send your friend a Christmas card with a snow scene on it and stand @ chance of getting a meerschaum pipe in return are cone siderably deceased. Christmas has grown into a come mercial holiday. “If Santa Claus could only inoculate the allege@ Christmas spirit with a few million microbes of come mon sense the day would bé an occasion of eightedne carat joy. People used to give Christmas presents for the pleasure there was in giving. Nowadays people give Christmas presents in the expectation of a comee % ; back, and nine times out of ten the come-back has. go® a horseshoe in it . “New York is a hard town to give Christmas pres« $ ents In. There {s so much fake front ‘here that the © | people are spoiled. The father in a small community » | who can make his offspring happy with a repertoire of Bleitts setting uim back about a five-case note would have a chill if he could seq what a father in similan circumstances in New York is up against. “A $30-a-week New Yorker with a family cons hime 3 self into the belicf that he has to hold up his end with. 3 people who have the mazuma to use for shaving papers > © 66 [: funny,” sighed the Cigar Store Man, “that 2 |He lives in an apartment-house, squeezes his Income until his fingers are calloused and balances himself on $ | the debt line from one year's end to the other. He tries to make friends among people who are better ballasted financially than he is, and his children are brought up in the idea that he is the business manager of a gold mine. When Christmas comes around he has to make 4 good to the peopié he knows or stand to get the marble heart treatment, and if the Christmas presents of his) young hopefuls are not as expensive as those of the: 2 kids of the foxy geezer in the next flat who pays hig, >} bills with checks there {fs a holler that loosens the gas > | fixtures. $ “What we ought to do is make up our ‘minds not to give Christmas presents to anybody we don’t want to give Christmas presents to. If they don’t like it, pass them up. I am In favor of organizing a ‘Society for the Suppression of Business Trades Disguised as Ohristmae Presents.’”” “It's a wonder you wouldn't get busy and organize It,” sald the Cigar Store Man. “Say,” answered the Man Higher Up,” you're wise to what happens to a reformer? Yes?"" A Battle of Languages, Three or four languages strove for mastery in anctent Gaul, which i» now France. German was spoken by the © | 12,000 Frank Invaders. Popular Latin wan epoken by 6,000,000 Gallo-Romans. Literary Latin was the language of the church and of Hterature, Low Latin was aiMeard the fanguage of the administration, German was the first to suo~ cumb. In founscenturies It ceased to be understood by the soldiers and in seventy years more it had become an object of ridicule, But It survives in more than 900 words, ex« pressing the things of government, law an G War, and forms no insignatica + of the Frenca language, ™_ Lighter than Cork. In spite of the formidable rivalry of the feather, the cor has hitherto held the foremost place among pseudonyms f: jack of welght. ‘his supremacy 1s now seriously Imperill by the discovery of marea wood, as reported to have beer mado by Capt, Truftert In the Bahr-ei-Ghazel and the nelghi borhood of Lake Tchad, It belongs tn the same specion thé mimosa, and as observed growing on the sHoresiof La! Tohad reached a helght of from 12 to 15 feet. It throws o! xhoots near to the ground, and its branches bear thorns and yellow flowers, The wood ts lighter than cork, * ad $ é Up-to-Date Germans, ‘Phere 8 an interesting conflict in Germany between dlacke man dun may he laik’ to hub dat dress {rt ob his'n din evenin’, ‘Mra Johnsing (the washlady)—Yo' go tell him he kaint hab it twell termorrah. daddy's doo gwine ‘Meripan pall dis evenin' UNCLE SAM, FARMER), In Castile, Spain, agriculturista hav~ ing made practical experimeuts, prefer American to Englishdinplementa, though toe datter have i ard ai American machinery that she was the com alte inane ted for the uxes for whisa It was in- is the same mistake was made, so the old Judge wrote back aide-de-camp in waiting: iso. | Antoine lon accepty, ote,, but Her eevee Soci in St. ied ‘aeain to POSTHUMOUS WIT. The jate Gir Antoine Dorion. Chief Justice of Quedec, was once invited to «ome annual function, but Lady Dorion, preferen work Ita ns it requites |; ‘decisive reason in this country, eaten) ‘ letter characters and the Roman alphabet, It is costly, to better ft- wong tr istinot Kinds of type, hence the infertority of n typography, The strain of reading “Gothic print }aiso contributes to the myopia prevalent in Germany, Yotq apiriy of #o-