The evening world. Newspaper, March 18, 1903, Page 12

MARCH 18, 1903. net hed by the Prean ssinlanssis Row, New York. Entered at the Post-Office ‘at New York as Second- Mail Matter. \WOLUME 43. .NO. 15,184. 2989OO0000000000400090100O8 O40 ® : WILLIE OX IS ST GAS REFORM PROGRESS. _ The notable development of Commissioner Monroe's | Fecommendation of a city electric plant with which to " PPpose the extortions of the lighting monopoly confirms e Evening World's earller characterization of it as as most important official report of the reform admin- istration.” Whether it is the “ten strike for the peo-| @ ” which Col. Monroe calls {t {s not so much our con- jeern as the very obvious fact that to commit the city to B policy of municipal ownership even to the extent here fadlicated 1s a momentous innovation. > The city authorities, their course once determined ¢ m, have shown an energy and celerity of action most @ommendafbie, It is less than a week since official) 7 Rotice was taken of The Evening World's exposures of Gas Trust extortion and its suggestion that the city’s| « bills as well as those of individual consumers deserved examination for overcharge. Within that time we have jad Commissioner Monroe's request for an appropria- on of $51,000 to provide facilities tor testing-the qual- @he Comptroller, have been very expeditiously for- “Never do it that way, Willie. Let me show you how simple a dificult shot 1s when you know how.” “Plaster your eye on the ball and notice the curve.” Willle—That just struck me right. BROOKLYN IS TO HAVE A “GREAT WHITE WAY,” TOO. BRIDGE $L9SE0 APTER 6 AORR ‘NO ere TRAF BROOK LYNITES GAVE THEIR owy CABAT “WHITR WAY, ‘newspaper's reform-agitation on -record. “Haat toe DRIVING:OUT THE CROOKS. ‘The-only horse with s-hyph Tm through you can shoot Gatling gm down|.., mous old paso Naas AFTER THE: SHOW) TOHN, DEAR, HOLO THE BABY WHILE a, ZT ENTOY vA BROILED LOBSTER!" Teturn to.an old Byrnes policy which always worked | jana and efficient officers of the & P. C. Gow many crooks dared cross the Wall street|H., will recognize the splendid portrait line” which Byrnes drew? of the horse with a hyphen. Ola Dr. Lemonosk:; ‘to-morrow. TH MoClusky can rid the town of Rogues’ Gallery|“ now supply ef begee will be re it may indulge him-in eny resulting relaxation of|cetved in from five to ten Gays All 8t wide doors or before grilled portcullises,|Tequests for badyes, accompanied by « two-cent stamp, will be placed on file, i will thereby be given the best assurance it/anq badges will be sent out ap goon as had in @ long time of @ diminution if not an ap-| they come tn. 7 hold. ‘Taken in custody yesterday by the entl-of the hold-upe, the burglaries, confidence| ot ena emicient offiers of the Bo- _ games and murders which have-made @ binck record of| ciety for the Prevention of Cruelty to grime in tho-city. srencr nen proves iby (Ge Cony. Blue The Old Undertakerist. Prof. Jom Mh A. Long: Kindly admit the tnojosed chasers to TO GET YOUR BEAUTY BACK. f you are a woman rum down by winter guyety, if + | your valuable institution: you find the approach of spring bringing with it pre-!" wr. Jolller—Whet do you think of a ‘monitory symptoms of that tired feeling, turn to the|man wh# buried a wife and three chil- next page of The Evening World’s Home Mngazine to-| atm and. then attended the theatre the morrow and take counsel with Mrs. Ayer—is there a| xiss Softheart—Oh! the horrid brute. fore competent authority?—about a course of Lenten| Mr. Joliter—Nopehie one was an under- » physical culture. akon. ‘Tho series of “Exercises for Restoring Beauty” which| John—Thmt,fellow De Wolf seems to Mrs. Ayer has prepared (s designed to tone up tired bee qaoerons ADEE: C7pF'ne rR, | feminine nerves and renew muscular elasticity and| "sno usvally-stritces me for @ loan. ~ f®oundness of contour where now there are signs of flab- JOSEPH MARX. Hiness and dread symptoms of fat following a winter of To the Conundrum Cage. Social dissipation with its accompaniment of late hours, | Prot. Jom ML. A. Long: Post sleop and midnight suppers. Tho winter revelry | {ave © tmlned nuree for these: ~ [hes overtaxed the digestion and now brings languor and ‘Jassitude where there should be a buoyant awakening at ee Ts comin, © Jewe e eoper? me 08 eoning. Because a jeweller elle watches and e Of all animals, mankind alone suffers from spring fe-| 5,1) \eeper watches o(s)ella, fer; it 1s the penalty of a misspent winter. tor k tke @ pig’e tall? To follow tizough Mrs, Ayer’s course of physical oul-| Because tt is at the end of pork. tture will do a wonderful amount of good in rehabilitating| |,rne Omer Say 1 eaw ® Drown mene the system. To exercise, to perspire, to eat plain food,| 1 paw an Italian trying to make « fo live a rational, normal life along the lines here indi-| peanut stand. iF. M, ated for the brief remaining weeks before Paster is to Poor Old Eve. Leat ‘Prot. Joh M. A Long: , a irae posaciadlaac Please reserve some bandages for these Jokes: A TRACTION HOLD-UP. ibe Main. Dixy IMepie, srecinior? Ber ‘ 4 ‘Announcement is made by the Metropolitan Traction| Why had Eve no fear of small-pox? 5 f th t _ Company that while the Dighty-sixth street line 1s being | Because she'd Adam (had 'em). ome Oo Q Be turned into an electric route “all traffic will be suspended pa seman saa Sant in @ perfumery 5 ‘jon the transverse road through Central Park.” Why 4s @ horse a curious feeder? Be- Jokes of the Day. fo for two months, in order to get from Eighth avenue | cause he cats best when he haa not « fio Fitth, t will be necessary to go down to Fifty-ninth |.) MA moun oe sepatty Prin er to One Hundred 3 J ‘treet or up to and Sixteenth, A very Bani ae Sel Ranter? Egwbert—The old fellow was sent to the county infirmary last week. Hamlett—That'e tough. But he will doubtless feel at home there. / e : 1, Wy iy g SS 6-P.My MY SIRE OF BRIDGES THIS'LL-BE THE VERY LAST PRINK, OLD MAN,-YOUVE GOT AN HOUR Te SPARE!!! ITS Nor Line 17 USED Te BB,- No MORE RUSHING HOME To DRESS POR, A THEATRE TRIP BACK TO WEW YoRKi" | BROOKLYN'S ‘TENDERLOIN AT DAWN: wake to revolutionize the city on which the eastern plank of the bridge rests, PELEPLLOLGODILOOPOP HG DIGHHGH-HOHS > ¢ Fa (PUZZLE OF THE CAMELS. There was once an Arab who had three sons, He died, leaving behind him & will in which he stated that his prop- erty, consisting of 17 camels, was to be divided betwpen his three sons. ‘The first was to have one-half of the camels, the second one-third and the third one- ninth, As they could not halve 17 camels, they went to @ neighbor and told him of thelr dimeulty, He lent them @ camel, eo that they had 18 to divide, 80 ‘The firet son took one-hali 9 The eecond, one-third 6 ‘The third, one-ninth, 2 7 Total They had divided equally, and yet were adie to give back the camel which had been lent to them. A RIBBON TRICK, convicted? Because it is not legel to 5 number of persons will be put to great inconven-|°ondemn @ man without @ hearing. “ ” rt Jar) ~What's your trade? | fence by this “hold-up.” But as tho route in question ix pie RE eg et as _ ne chiefly for transfers and not directly remunerative,| Judge-~What were you trying to do ythe company sees no occasion to take measures to ac-| Hen the police enteredt yeommodate its patrons. Burgiar—Making a bolt for the door. PASCAL B. MURANO, ‘Newark, N. J. @rovx Trolley Franchises—In granting franchise|These Two Refused Admittance, Fights to the, new Bronx trolley routes many members of| prot, Josh M. A. Long: WILL DRAW THE LINE. i She Board of Aldermen expressed themselves as in favor| Jones—Kitty hes Syracuse hair, “She always was such eo original | ef the grant “because it would insure competition with| Browne—Why do you call It Byreouse girl.” D> the Union Ratlway Company, which now has x monopoly | hair? “What's she Gone now?’ ‘@f the surface traction in the Bronx.’ Fond and fleeting} Jones—Because tt is not far tram AW] “Got engaged by wireless telegregh; ype! How long before we shall see them absorbed? Is] burn, “Pil bet you she won't be mationed Mo fecollection of the new and competing Wast| which travels the fastest; or} with a singless engagement, though." Gas Company that only 4 few years ago imposed | cola? Chicago Reoord-Herald, ‘up streets on us with the promise of relief from the| Jeet; you can easily eatoh cold, ns of monopoly? Before a year had passed it had ALBERT iA, LLOYD. HARDEST OF Att “ “What,” asked the inquta(ttve. persan, oa In the Padded Coll. “do you find to be the hardest problem with Con. lome-Dr, _| Prot, Josh M. A. Long: your existence?’ ie f ? @ warm bed on a cold morning,” re- me 3 5 SpUUmPLON, said: “in all my Years) “ote it takes a hen and» half a day|Plied the sage from Sageville,—Chicago qubsrculowias” Te te ne tied 888 Of and g half to lay an ogg and a halt, now | Nemes Yor iaasiiien that ond oor rid long will it take an elephant 40 fill his EXPLANATION, war buttons? He thought his conversation mate Sanewiasion Makes 16 greatest “Intowleating.” Why - Becavec no matter how thin Ls enlightened. car me Bah He oscomn ? Tent Te vemue dey erga SIMPLE, BUT CURIOUS, Fill @ wines with water up to the brim go that the surface of whe water ts rounded, ‘Then ask your friends how many oolne can be put inte the glaas: without the water ove: way nal It will not hol ping the coins very carefully CONUN®RUMS, By a inte abs pahe of'gians Is You Can break iene [even 8 Many #4 five or six coins, t! ALEXAN. an Oxe, DER A. COLLING. A Broadway restaurateur 1s to open an up-to-date after-thentre restaurant {n Brooklyn. Hore are some of the gayeties which may follow in its % ing. Some willl AMarita Ventre” * ct e , * water edgewise it will be found that} i® & ‘idttaiaage leant tBaby to Bis corn? Wiseman—Suppose we have a high ball. 9O$O0$4000O00960050000550HHH0O-0OOO0OOD WHEN SHE DOESN’T MARRY, Some Advantages in Remaining Single. BY HELEN OLDFIELD. OR long ages the chief end and aim of woman's extste ence was accounted to be marriage. Teachers and! Preachers laid stress upon the fact that the first woman was created as a helpmeet for the first man, ignoring the companton fact that she was by no means!a suo. | cess in the capacity. ‘Marry well 4f you can, but In eny. case marry,” was the creed which good women taught thelr | daughters aiong with their prayers. Not a century agone It was © common custom In country neighborhoods that the j | unmarried sister of @ bride should dance at the wedding { without shoes, while the term “old maid," applied to all) women who at twenty-five were still unmarried, was one of reproach, almost of opprobrjum. Girls were married at elx- ‘teen years or younger, and the rosebud ungathered until full; =! flowered was supposed not to be worth pluckt | however, the girl of the perfod hus different 1d woman boldly asserts and has fully established her ight ¢e merry or not to marry, as seems good in her own eyes, Withe | out regard to the fulfilment of the presumed mission of women as wife and mother, says Helen Oldfield in the Chicago Tribune, Marriage is, after all, a lottery, and a woman should be. in earnest before whe takes the risk. She who finds her life full and complete alone, who has no consel of having } met her better half; who feels that she has a tam other than matrimony, and can do better her duty ito fereoit | and ber neighbor unmated, had better remain eo, Single Diesseciness will truly be hers, and probably will prove more satisfying in the long run than the chance of the double hap- piness behind whose richest chords lurks always ite dart. relative minor. Women who do nat marcy may miss muoh Joy, but they also escape much sorrow and not @ litte misery. The woman, also, who has a strong will of her own is rerely a happy wife, unless she loves her husband so well! and admires him so much that she is freely willing to bow ‘that will to his wisdom. There must necessarily be friction when two who are not agreod undertake to walk together, bearing @ common yoke. St. Paul, who had small opinion of tHe women folk, tella BOIDDFH99F9O99H9G999H99HHHHHH9D King Solomon, who ought eurely to have known, sald: “He that findeth a wife findoth a good thing, and obtaineth favor with the Lord.” .A saucy girl once asked an English divine why nothing was said about husbands, and the witty deam | replied that Solomon was too wise to waste words, seeing} that he,knew the women would get marcied anyway. She Who marries for a home chooses in most cases tht hardest possible manner in which to earn her iving. ! PERCY AND THE GIRL. i, Each Describes a Thrilling Scene, PERCY PERICLES THIMBLETON was almost breathless | when he reached his place behind the glove counter. He pressed his daintily gloved hand to his heart as he; turned to ‘his counter mate, Maggie Mulligan, and gasped | softly: “I positively think, Margaret, that I can hear my beart beat, It was really @ most terrible thing—eo awfully thrill- ing that I fear my nerves are rudely shocked, I am afraid Iwill have to take five violet hearts to still the fluttering of my pulse. Do you think I will faint, Margaret?” ‘Maggie shifted her gum, tilted her nose and sniffed: “Aw, stow your sugar dope an’ epititout.”” ‘The last of the Thimbletons Anished his violet heart ongy, drew up to the full of his § feet 1 and began: “Tt was right near the corner, Ah! but she was ravishing- ly fair, A perfect flower, a poem of whites and pinks, And| such eyes—so blue and so deep and so round." ‘“Didjerever gee ‘em square?” interjected Maggie. ‘She was crossing the street,” Percy rambled on, “and she «lipped and fell and a big horse was rushing right down on her and Mt looked as if she would surely be crushed under \ the great truclipand women screamed and I shudteret end) * fw! | creamed end she turned pale, But"—capturous{ { pause—"the driver stopped the horse.” Muggle gave @ snort and released her gum. “Hah! if you'd been down by th’ Canarsie cros» roads this, morning you'd ‘ave wove inter a fit,” she led off, with a toss | Ignoring the question, “but she jumped ou trom ¢h’-pese cart.” ‘“Bplendtat” “But right in front of th’ hook an’ ladder an’ ”. stopped to brush away an imaginary tear—"an th’—th' waeall went right over her an'—an' crushed out her pore young Iife,"* “How terribly awful, Margaret.’ “Oh, I dunno. She'll make a good stew, “Why, what do you mean, Maggi, “Bure, whe wap one o' Mamie He A wave of