The San Francisco Call. Newspaper, October 6, 1901, Page 6

(Copyrighted, 1901 McCrhure ©o) w sed when He threw he paper down. ‘*here’s an- uther fello t thinks the Boys have robbed of their been and Nobuddy has ping to Get there in It makes me Sorry to see One nice s that I ¢ H a ¢ Pr: was handed n't Go aro m Generation to Generation i mily Got dam up in n I'm I my Boys are ° li of sublime Thots and S as ver was and m more So, his m spairs enny of f You.don't that pencil in the Bak ear T'll teatch you One of t of Life at’ll Got th make ¥ telesco, TAKE, ForaT AT S (Copyrighted, 1901, by 8. 8. McClure Co.) MA ery tle w since he Opened up been trying to Get maw to Go for a ride in the Country. Maw would go if paw would let the: ksmith or en- run it, But pride in a it would on e to sit tho I was some fles Names of things rong ¢ between a Not m I was sixteen old I ust to work Country saw r1urning the engine, and it wouldn't saying mutch for hewmun Intelligence if 1 couldn’t Operate a little bit of a ma- sheen Like this after I've got to Be n at I offen and an Mill Ke the e didn’t want to Hurt paw's . but she wouldn't Go unless he ons First enny way, So he went and 1 Sundy he brot masheen around to let us have a Good time. “One thing I like about an ottum mo- bile, “‘he told us, “is that it Won't stand up on its Hind feet if you happen to Get to the crossing just the Train's com- g, and You don’t haft to Be bizzy me trying to keep it From Get ting its tail Over the rains.” “That makes me Think of an old mare we Ust to have,” Uncle Ramsey told us. “She would aliw watch for the First ance to put her Tail over the Rains and when she Got it There she seemed to En- joy it so well that we wouid haft'to all- most get a pole or Sumthing to pry it Loose. once I Got to thinking about it and pritty soon I invented a skeem.” took le 1 Got to lerning how “Inventing things seems to run in your famt maw Told paw and Uncle Ram- THE SUNDAY CALL ©? the Ayrmricken peeple is that they al- ways keep Thinking they’'ve reached the Limit and ‘there’s no Use Looking shed for Beter things. George Washington was the Ritchest man in the Country when he Died and he Wasn't worth Half a Million either: But I s'pose Lots of pee- ple Sat around in Those days and Got Eiue becog they thot all the Munny was Getting into a Few hands and Their chil- wouldn’t have chance when me."” dren enny heit' turn C: Good deal worse now,” maw reon with Less than Fif- ion hast to Be Satus- fied with a place in the middle Class and Car’t hope to be Called the Napoleon of Ennything."” “I no it's Discurridging to Have that much mun; and still be common,” paw told her, “but I claim Such peeple have ance to work up to Nobuller and r things, just the Saim. Look at the peeple ust to Shake their heds and LJ TAE AND sey, but they Didn’t pay Enny a Tenshen nd Uncle Ram: sed: “Whenever ould Go out driving with the Old Mare after that I would put on an Extry rain and then Let her get her il over it rite at the Start. After that Would go Along satusfied all da; s and never give anuther switch. The hewmane society thot it was crewill tho, becoz she couldn’t keep t | off and Hold on to the rain me time, so They ma it up or I mite of Got it bble with Horses,” paw 't let them Have their own way it'’s Crewill to Them, and if you Do it's no Fun for the peeple that's d ing. It's different with the Ottum mot You can run that All day to be Afrade that mebby with the Botts or a Raw place where the Rut Now come on. As the sile. and not Haft it'ss suffering d crowds ignobull strife rent on and Zip away, aste of Country life, luzzent smells of new mown r ry song e broad stre ladness in the d paw and Uncle Ramsey were on nt seat and maw and Little albert b on Behind. Aw sed just as paw was Giv- a Start What's the Did you pay was Due this month? there mite be trubble it wasn't paid, an to Get back saf “That’s the trubble with you maw,” paw Tcld ber, “you Always manidge to make peeple stari away with trubble on their Mund when they are Trying to have a od time. Yes, it's paid. Now try to nk of sumthing cheerful for a while and see how it seems.” We went along nice and Easy for a while, and Everybuddy was commencing to Think it w 0ing to turn Out for the B only Little Albert's hat blew oft Every few Blocks, so_after while, paw Jamomed it under the Seat, and Told us to hold Tite becoz he was Going*to Turn on a Few more ampeers. Maw wanted to no what an Ampeer was, but paw, told fe insurance that maw ast; ‘‘becoz Getting the muny if Enny.of us Happened GEoRGIEy DA | FAMILY OBlIL.r—— _ == ~THE or KEPT FENCE SNTO BUDDY’S ORC Thir¥ smmthing was Golng to Brake be- fore Long when Jay Gould was Getting reddy for the Rainy day. They thot their boys wouldn’t have enny Chance then, But a Good menny of the Boys have Got there since that Time all rite, and I'll bet J. Pierpont Morgan's fond Old father use to Get to worrying in the nite when the Sad thot would Come to Him that all the chances would Be Taken when his poor Boy got reddy to Strike Out for Himself. Thirty or Forty years from now the Self made man who had Only a million Dollars to his name when he started for New York to Carve out a Forche for himself Will Look kind of Sad at his Boys that he can’t Leave more than about a Quarter of a Billlon aplece to and worry becoz they won't have the Chance he Had.” Poor old hewmun naitcher. This wonld be a Gladder world if nobody had hewmun naitcher in sistem. only peeple that Don’'t look ahead His The and i | | JUMPED TAE | SUM- > RARD, | it was tor when he wa t before we new ountry. ““This is what it Is t. Twentieth ~ centcherry, nccks Darwin’s theory All fo smash, You | can’t make me Believe that a man who | could get up a Thing like this and One that can run it The way I am ever got Dissended from munkeys. God made man | in his own immidge, and Along about that time we Got into some decp Sand, and the first thing we new the Ottum mobile Gave a kind of Sad grone and stopped. Paw put on all the Current in the Box, but she just stood there and Trembled, and kind of humped up a Lit- | tle. Dalngerous to Talk to the Operating, and | t we were Uut In be Living in the | paw sed. ““This | “‘Well, confound it,” paw sed after while, *‘can’t a Few of you Get Out?” So we all clum down_ except paw, but still it wouldn’t go and the wheels kep | getting deeper in the sand all the Time. Then paw got out, too, but forgot to puli the Handie back, and him and me and Uncle Ramsey got Behind and Commenct to push and pritty soon she Gave a jump, and the nd Flew and the ottum mobile went down the Rode like the man that's hypnotized goes over the Benches | tords the stage when the professor tells him to Come on, & Maw Got Little albert and the Baby up on the Bank and told me to Hurry behind something. Then Paw started to run after it, and Uncle Ramsey yelled: “If you catch it, come back this way. ‘We'll wait for you here.” They was a turn about a half a mile below, but the ottum mobile kept on Strait and jumped the fence into some- body’s orchard and when paw Got there it ‘was trying to Climb a tree, but broke sumthing before it Had got up Very far. After while a farmer came Along with a Load of vegitabulls for the market next Morning, and we Got_him to chain us on Behind. When we Were on the Way Home and all neerly choked with thé dust the Farmer's horses made Uncle -Ramsey sed: “‘Anuther good Thing about an Ottum mobile is that when it's broke down you Dot haft to Worry for Fear It mite be Maw laft out Loud, but paw sed some peeple are bilt s0 they never seem to No when a Joke’s gone Far enuff. GEORGIE. | and commenced to Hoder: Worry are the Ones that might get Ben- efitted by it if they Would. The fello that Drinks too mutch never Looks ahed and thinks about The way he in going to Feel the next morning, and the Only ones that Don’t fret For fear their Boys won't have as Goed a chance as They did Themselves never had enny chance at all. “Yes,” Uncle Ramsey sed, “that's the way it Goes all thru Life, It makes me Think df when I was In the army. Every time enny fello Got promoted to be a Captun or Major all the Rest would Get Sad and think the Next Battle would end the war and they wouldn't be a Chance for Enny of The rest of Them; but the Fite kept Going on and Every few Days a Lot of the Boys that worrled for fear the trubble was all Over would Get killed in a Skirmish or Sumthing, so the open- ings kept Getting made rite Along for new men. * That tot me to Always Look on the Brite side of Things Never can tell what’'s Going to happen after it's over, and when a Fello becoz you 1 sits dewn to walt for His own funeral it's a pritty Sure sine that he Won't cut much of a Figure when he Goes to it, after all."” While paw and maw Were Lafiing at What he Sed Uncle Ramsey lit his pipe again and Some of the Ashes fell Down inside of His vest, so pritty Soon he Gave himself a kind of a Rub up and down and Sed: YIf T was out in the Country I'd almost think a Chigger or Two had Got after me,” and Then he Jumped up with a Yell, “Put me out Py w C me out.” bbed up Our best rug and Got P. | a kind of a Strangle Hold on Uncle Ram- sey. Then he tried to Rap the rug Around ! him, but before Uncle Ramsey got So he | would Stand quiet Maw Came in with a REJUMPED UP WITA A YELL_ AND COMMENCED 70 FPLLER — Dishpan full of Water and Threw it all “I'm glad it Happened becoz now I no when you had the Chance.’ Over both of Them. you Luv me For myself and not just paw goes around Look- After the trubble was ended Uncle Ram- becoz you pect to Get my 'munny that was r sey sed: I , or you would of Let me « e 2 gt 2 2 v i L] O ) | | AUSTARK.. Is the est Love Story Written in " Years. Begins in Sunday Call, October 13th.