The San Francisco Call. Newspaper, January 6, 1901, Page 6

THE SUNDAY CALL. at it was hat me frind.” new pancake hats " nles diz be wearin'— the pa-apers they call ell, it was Toozy had gger she was that herself ¢ be had it an wid her ¥ ¥ h an’ her skurf; e widow. as the “ra the pa walk to tell fwhin I first aggerty, I n on 1t gun to say to Toozy ne for any- new hat in he ficles at mo an’ dert years behoind I ought to alarm e me up. *C see th st thing out? sez she in & tone ev V'ice that seemed to say she was sarry to have a moother that was so ignororious. ‘I can see that it 1 be a danged soight later gettin' out aff I had annything to do wid it sez I, ‘fur, be- d never be out,’ sex I. ‘Fwhy, * sez she, ‘can’t ye see that it's oyle panca-ake hats?’ buy & the wan av the new gh - "CONSIDER 1T DISCOVERED ‘I see sez she. # flat enough fo fts na-ame. ‘but fwhat the divil pos- sesses ye that ye want to wear such a mint as that ‘IVs fashuybll,’ sea sez 1, BY MR. BOWSER! s r backs to the "THRERE'S NOT THET HPIGHT AV CROWN YO IT." she. ‘An’ Y shuppese,’ gez I, ‘that aff they axed ye to stick a feather in & washtub an’ put it an yer head,' sez I, ‘ve'd do it to be fashnybil,! sez I. But she med mo ro answer, Mrs. McGlaggerty: she simply shtuck her shnout up in the air an' walked out av the room, wagglin' her [ Joret a AT perirent Jn’ Jntecest OF Sclences /1 ARt "WHAT ARE YOU FELLOWS UP TOU SHOUTED MR. BOWSER: norma:, anda then escorted ck yard. Therg were sr ag: the fence, and he select el is "Ol THREwW A 6?__,?‘1}]15@){( Hal, HEAD AV CABBAGE AT HER | BY WAAY AV CORRECTIN' NER BAD MANNNERS® H tions 2 cold night, one experiment. id sat them do n. ade to order for such an It was a keen, Jn T WOOZY WAY TO THE KITCHEN. E MADE HiIS “Now, then” sald Mr. Bowser as all was ready, “I take it that you feel cold?" “W-e d-o!" replied the men in chorus through their chattering teeth. “That is splendid. I estimate that there Is a difference cf east 40 degrees be- tween vour te - and that of the weather. Y Il now each of you take nd let it slowly s your blood vour mouth In two e the same temperature as the you ought to Imagine ing and daisies bloom- five Mr. Bowser wasn't akperimanting on !f he discree retired to the warm kitchen and took nis scarcely be- one of the ver and began to kick like s harness et and spat and nd crammed his while up to?" shouted eomed went antics than as if they had hot horseshoes. It was » either of cooled h 1em could mouth S S e e e e o Veryla F tall lofke Mrs. Leslie Ca-arter diz In ‘Zazyo.' Ol thréw & head av cabbage at ber be wa-ay av correctin’ her bad man- ners, an’ aff it wasn’t that she guessed fwhat was comin’ an’ dodged Jjisht In tolme divil the mooch av the panca-ake hat id be left, Mrs, McGlaggerty. “Yurra, but 't's the quare conrectionairy intoirely, me frind, That's fwhat the bong tongs calls hats an’ bonnets now—confec- tionairy—so aff ye want to be in the shtoyle, Mrs. McGlaggerty, be sure that ye don’t call thim hats an’ bonnets, but confectionairy—jisht loike goom dhraps ) mu suyckolate carrymills. The panca-ake hat looks for all the world loike a shtove led clapped on the top av the head. Upon me word there’s not thet hoight av crown to it,” said the widow, measuring off the ixteenth of an inch on her thumb nail. “Afl war av Barnim an’ Bailey's big est CS:(yf( o5 55 ) o ellyphants had shtepped an it an’' after- ward shlept an it, it wudn't be anny flatter, me frind. A little wisp av ribbon primped up in the middle av the pan- ca-ake is all the thrimmins it has, an’ WHERE-DID Y¥EIQET THAT THINGT bechuxt yerself an' meself, it's plinty, fur it wud be a sin to spile a couple av ¥a-ards av gud ribbon an sooch a noight- mare av a hat, Mrs, McGlaggerty, * ‘Fwhere in the na-ame ay all that's horrible an’ heejous did ye get that thing, Toozy, me darlint,’ sez I to her fwhin she with an fefcle hanging to the clothesline and stuttered: “B-b-boss, what s-s-sort of a g-g-game is this “Yes, what sort of a g-g-game?” the other as a melted mouth, “It’s no game at all as T told you. What have you don those lozenges?” - “S-s-spit 'em out “Yes; sp-spit " “But you m raise the tempera 1t affects the temper: phere. If you'd keep st you'd have been persp Sit down and try it ag said the firet, as he cont added plshy tn his Tt's an experiment s with durn y m out!™ ed attempt to burn up the vitals of tv respectable gents?" “It do, “And by b away our apy “That's the “If 1 was pl £ any game, would 1 promise you a quart ce?” asked Mr. Bowser. 's our solemn opinyun Mr. Bowser was about protest and increase his cash off hen th gentlemen with burned n him and Mrs. B window, and t from a the next two climbed the y went out to look for Mr were thousands « but it took three actual presence and d the snow. He had been tence, and t Bowser. out from thumped ar kicked and choked, but Hfe had not parted. He soon rallled and sat ug 1 after being helped to his feet he made his woozy way to the kitehen and tk up staire. He aid pened, and Mrs. E wser ga of fifteen minutes on the she sald Mickeens av postage st luk . an’ phwin you'get a let ye ait me a at Toozy's I'll ive phwere I stand, Mrs, * divil the kick I'Il make “Th’ cidya av panca J indigna the stoyle!" “Fwhy, the he ce for y ca-akes; they belongs I the shtomick. They wur invinted to alt an’ not to wear, I'm mixen the batther for some av thim pow, Mrs. McGlaggerty!” JOHN J. JENNINGS. ——— Her mouth was not so very large, Yet, In a confidential minute, She told the dentist that she had Three well-developed achers in it. —Baltimore American.