The San Francisco Call. Newspaper, July 31, 1898, Page 20

20 FRANCISCO CALL, SUNDAY, JULY 31, 1898. Discussed by JESSIE ACKERMAN, RABBI TATISTICS show us the fact, looked upon as alarming by some of our sociologists, that the wrriage rate is decreasing among us. i y the case in Massachusetts, and Kar where marriages in proportion to the number of are occu adult inhabit so much 1 1 uently than they did in former as to arouse an int gative in- te only in those States themselves but in the at large. here in San Franci: e rate during the past s The la. co the decrease in the years has been very a population of a 50,000; - 12 . were_credited by with an ase since then of at And yet the number of marriage licenses issued here last year wi less than °r which was issued during the year ending *isco license ac- as follow: 1891-2, , 3218; 1 , 3164; f decrease for the and the reason for ussed. Some of our 1l conditions here ex- *an Fra jents of soc r views on the subje . e In other days the woman was lost in the wife and mother, the individual was absorbed in the idea of .. her “sphere,” which was hedged by an invisible line, confining her activ: ties to household dutie - hence the chief end of woman was marriage and motherhood; but the condi- tions of our times, the unrest in the social. political JESSIE ACKERMAN, W.C T. L NIETO, F. R DANFORTH, JOHN consequence thousandsfgare just selfishly existing in our overcrowded professions and in clerical posi- tions, who might marry and live well and happily had they been taught to avail themselves of the various industrial opportunities in our land. It is universally acknowledged that the ratio of marriage to the population in any civilized community affords one of the best indications of social prosper- ity or its reverse. A decrease in the number of mar- riages is only one of the many evidences of the fail- ure of merely intellectual training to secure pros- perity. Another evidence is the great increase of crime, which is so marked as to call for especial notice. Indust the inseparable basis of honesty, and industry, ng long been relegated to a secondary place in the estimation of our people, the consequence is that public dishonesty has increased to alarming proportions. The most hopeful feature of the present state of the comparatively recent introduction of in- education in our schools and universities. National prosperity depends primarily upon such a movement, and its natural consequence—honesty. Another great, but so far unrecognized, principle is back of this. Personal freedom depends upon the op- portunity to secure a livelihood without the aid of any other person, and that opportunity is only afforded by the gifts of nature which belong to every one by right, WHY IS MARRIAGE ON THE DECREASE? HEMPHILL, D.D., THEODORE HITTELL, J. H. STALLARD, M.D., CHARLOTTE BLAKE-BROWN, M.D., J. RICHARD FREUD. objects of pity and entitle them to the merciful con- sideration of any jurist. o The ordinary hardly ever, and the wise man never, marries unless he sees good prospects ahead. Mar- - riage is a great and far- | reaching responsibility, THEODORE HITTELL, | CoT™he man or. woman R who assumes that re- ——— sponsibility carelessly and thoughtlessly, without carefully and circumspectly weighing all the probabilities and possibilities con- nected therewith, makes a grave mistake, which will entall grievous trouble, and in many cases actual suf- fering upon many innocent persons in the generations yet to come, The prevailing “hard times” of the past few years have undoubtedly had a seriously deterrent effect up- on many who would—were prosperity the rule—have entered the married state. No man likes to ask the woman he loves to share a precarious existence or act- ual poverty with him. He does not feel that it would be just to her or pleasing to himself to place her in surroundings which have in them no element of present comfort or prospect of future prosperity. Therefore it is that statistics show that marriages are governed— however much the sentimentalist may desire to think the contrary—entirzly by the conditions of the coun- thousands of men who, under the conditions which prevailed a decade or so ago, would be able and glad to take upon themselves the responsibilities of matri- mony are now either unemployed or are working for salaries inadequate to support more than one person. It is not the mere fact that women have become workers that makes the trouble; it is the fact that in .almost every case when a woman supplants a man in a business position she does so for a salary much lower than that which her male predecessor received. This point is usually made in the application for em- ployment—the woman will do the work required quite as well, and far cheaper, and as a simple business proposition the firm to which she applies usually gives her the place. The consequence of this is that the rate of wages for all situations \ hich it is rossible for women to fill has become so lowered that even those men who are still retained as clerks, bookkeepers, stenographers, etc., are unable to earn more than their own livings. If only those women and ~irls who really need em- ployment would seek and secure it the situation would be much better. When a woman does as good work as a man she ought to receive as good wages, and she should demand them. The main trouble is, though, that thousands of girls with good homes prefer busi- ness life to helping their mothers about the house; so UNCLE SAM, N.Y. MERALD, . = ood’s luxuries. The love of a manly man ?\?il}lerx;]ag}:;“;ny worthy girl willing to help him carve out his fortune; but as girls cannot even -hint con- cerning their feelings in this regard ma a happy marriage Is prevented by this misapprehe on. = It is a verycommon error among men—particularly young men—to think that because some women are selfish, worldly and mercenary such traits-are charac- teristic of the sex. As a rule a woman_is far more ready to give up luxuries and-even comforts for the sake of one she loves than is her brother. kg If a young man would decide to give up his cigars and his club and the numerous other little self-indul- gences which decrease his income so that he does not feel that he can afford to marry, he would find him- off in many ways. Eelrl?ee«‘;fl;'é‘?né"man 3o thi and then look about him for a good, sensible girl who is willing (and many more of them than society is aware of really are) te get up an establishment on a small scale and ‘hnly him make his way in the world as her mother helpea her father, and a happy marriage will be the result. There is too much of selfishness and pretense among us; when we are more self-sacrificing qnd more honest with each other, we shall all be happier. At present “muy rico,” as the Spaniards say, seems the desideratum in too many of the marriages which take place. e L In this emphatically ecommercial age it impgesses me that question of marriage has unfortunately ———————— | become also a commercial J.RICHARD FREUD, problem. Sec. Merchants’ Association. The first expgetation of those about to embark e on the voyage of matri- mony is, in most cases, not a question of lové or feel- ing so much as a question of bettering their material condition. Competition in nearly all the walks of life has be- come so keen that a majority of our young men ecan- not see their way clear to maintain a home complete and elegant enough in its appointments to agree with their accustomed ideas. In the life of the workman, especially those en- gaged in factories or those who perform the ordinary ‘ Wi L LA — . SPUTTERING IN THE SOCKET, OSTON WERALD. us world spread to the home, and woman borne out upon the tide of an indescribable rest- ss which crystalized into a desire to become an “individual”—to individualize herself. In her effort to gain this end she unconsciously opened new doors of learni d ayenues of industry which have ‘led to hat truly has thrown a spell over yman of to-day, filling her with ambition along new. lines. The desire to sustain this freedom of independence has. brought her into business competition with man and in the race it may be fairly stated that she comes out ahead and proves herself an individual, wholly competent of se upport; in other words “woman has discovered herself. 3 In the final analysis of the question “why mar- e is on the decre " it may briefly be summed up has become an individual. She cd not ‘depend on man for bread e and freedom of such life of housekeeping and the 1otherhood. of affairs upon the home ample scope for meditation, sent, will stand a good-sized - 1) .- I feel convinced that the present conditions are due to the false system of education which has pre- \ el S " vailed for so many years: ! ). H. STALLARD; M. D.{ We have devoted " our- | selves to cultivating and educating the intellectual powers to the ufter neglect of industrial trajning. Even here in California this has been the case, and the consequence of it is that both sexes have been taught to live rather by their wits than by honest work. In at least to the extent of a bare subsistence. Upon that right to subsistence freedom depends alone. The natural condition of things is that every man should marry and have one wife. When a man can be sure of supporting a wife, or when there is indus- trial sympathy between them so that they can work together for each other, prosperity and the marriage rate will increase together. W So far as the Jewish community is concerned I am aware of no appreciable diminution in the number | — T of tl"nll:,l’l'iagells iil.! the pl‘fis- en ime. It is true that ] RABBI NIETO, I the marriage rate varies T T L trom fmonth .t midnth; this being caused by the condition of business rather than by any alteration in sentiment as to matrimony itself, but the general average of marriages among us remains the same. So far as America is concerned if the marriage rate is becoming less in proportion to the population than it has been heretofore, I think that the fact may be justly attributed to the laxity of the divorce laws. Men do not feel to-day justified in taking upon themselves responsibilities when the other partner to the contract may shake them off for little or no rea- son. o many cases have come to public notice lately of women who found that they were “not in sym- pathy” with their husbands, when after five years or more of married life those husbands have met with serious financial reverses, that the generality of young men have been led to reflect seriously on this subject. The result has undoubtedly been in many in- stances that men who would otherwise be glad to rry and have homes of their own have grown chary of inflicting upon their fair partners that degree of mental agony and distress that would render them fit try. In “good times” the rate of marriage increases; in “bad times”_jt decreases. A study of matrimonial statistics will show the rise and fall of the tide of prospefity in any district not affected by outside in- fluences, and conversely a-study of business condi- tions will approximately tell the tale of the new households formed there. 1 do not consider that the more general employment of women has anything to do with the matter. If a girl has sufficient domestic instinct—or. rather sufii- cient love of domesticity—to;make her a good wife and mother, business life wl(l not take the place of home life in her heart. I belleve in giving all, male or female, the opportunity to, if possible, make their ambitions realities—at any rdte to exercise their abil- ities and carve out their lives as best they can. A girl who, because of restrictions, limitations and lack of opportunities to live her own life her own way, “marries for a home,” will not be apt to make that home what it ought to be. When slLe marries because she of her own free will and accord chooses to take the step, her home will be her pride and glory, and a center from which good will radiate to the outside world, . Z > .l ou It is difficult to assign any one reason for that gen- eral decrease in the number of marriages during the e e A R - L relw ye:rl. whig‘}; statisticians have not R 'R -DANEORTH, and scientists and schol- Marriage Licarse Clerk. - ars are new gravely con- T sldering. Undoubtedly, however, one of the reasons, and the principal one in my opinion, I8 to be found in the in- creased number of women wage-earners, The em- plovment of women in many positions formerly -filled exclusively by men has become general, and a servant is hired to take the daughter’s place, or the mother works alone, and the girl works for less than living wages, for the reason that her living is assured and_ her salary is devoted merely to non-essentials. Having assisted in reducing the salary of the aver- age young man, the average yvoung working woman does not look favorably upon him as a suitor, even if he forgets his financial circumstances sufficiently to wish to marry. She feels that she is far better off in a. store or office with light duties, regular hours, and money of her own, than she would be as the over- worked wife of a poor man with whom nearly all her sisters are in competition. Probably she is right, but her decision is based on conditions which she herseir has helped to change—whether for better or worse is an open question. s One great reason for the decrease in the number of marriages is the complexity of modern life, for —_— which T cannot in justice CHARLOTTE | say that the men are really to blame. BLAKE BROWN, M.D. I A man receiving a e et e e e n s moderate salaiv. or - bew ginning business in a modest way, is attracted by a girl and really wishes to marry her, but the weflection that he cannot afford to maintain her in the style to which she is accustomed prevents him from asking her to share his lot. A man who sees the girl of his choice always elegantly attired, living in a fine house, and petted and indulged and waited upon as loved daughters of well-to-do families always are, naturally hesitates about asking her to begin far lower down on the ladder of worldly prosperity with him. Did he but know it in very many cases the girl would be glad to bear her share of life’s burdens, and in a happy little home of her own would Tegret none unskilled labor of our farming communities, a still more serious competition must be taken into consid- eration. The advent to our shores of alien peoples, whose plane of civilization is so low that the absolute necessities of existence are all that they require to sustain them in contentment makes the lot of our Doorer classes even harder to bear than it would otherwise be., Bvery true American workingman ex- pects to “get on in the world.” He does not consider that he is in a certain grade or doomed to remain amidst certain surroundings tor life. He hopes to be- come a master mechanic,or an employer, to own his little home and give his children a better education than he received himself. When from unfair rivalry this hope is taken from him he does not feel like a ing any woman to share a lot which.is devoid of com- fort for the present nr‘pror_mse‘for the future. Without looking into the matter careful I can only say that times for the past five years c have i rn br’en exceptionally hard ILL,D.D.| all over the country, and | JOHN HEMPI-A‘*V that young men, conse- quently, have .probably not felt in a position to drive a double team. Looking &t’ the matter from another standpoint it may be truthfully .said that there is a growing sus- picion abroad that young womeén—even our own young women here in San Francisco—are not willing to begin domestic life at the beginning and live in the frugal way in which their mothers and grandmothers lived, The standard of living has been so raised that the day may come that matrimony, save in excep- tional cases, may be looked upon as an unattainable luxury. “Love in a cottage” is not over fashionable even now; our young people of the future maw refuse to recognize the possibility of its existence.