The San Francisco Call. Newspaper, December 20, 1896, Page 12

10 JUPGE Low By L\ e A A TA\ CLAuS 7 e % A= Scene in the Rooms of the P THE SAN FRANCISCO CALL, SUNDAY, DECEMBER 20, 1896. ress Club When the Yauletide Jinks Had “Caught On.” THE PRESS CLUB JINKS - WAS An Evening of Song, Short Inaugurates the Bohemia. A Hit Made by the Newspaper Club Before Many Assembled Guests. MUSIC AND WIT ARE MINGLED | Sire Melvin Captures the Crowd With His Humor and Juige Huat Reads a Paper on Politics. No jinks or other club enteriainment ever presented to its friends by the Press Club succeeded in making a better hiz than the Yuletide jinks at the clubrooms | last night. The attendance of representative veople was large, including artists, musicians, men of affairs, members of the learned | professions and aistingnished visitors, | such as General Forsyth and Editor Tay- lor of Boston. The cozy, softly-tinted rooms were | neatly decorated and by 10 o’clock the programme was well started. The strik- ing features were musical and literary, the great hits of the evening being made by the sire, Harry Melvin, by musical celeb- rities and bright newspaper men, judges and others who participated in the exer- cises. The Christmas tree, presided over by Judge Low, made a big hit, for many unique little presents were made, accom- panied by appropriate legends on tags. President Coe demeaned himself with rare dignity, smiling when the various members made a hit. Fred Myrtle was a very active spirit dur- ing the evening, singing, managing and domng all in his power to make things go off with a hurrah. The programme opened with a snappy musical skit called “The Assassination of Dull Care.” Messrs. Shaughan, Myrtle, Henley, Coffin, Ward, Melvin, Tucker and Tilton, dressed as monks with gowns and cowls, sang songs, did dialogues and put Dull Care, an old graybeard, to death. Myrtle represented Bacchus and made | a strike with his song, entitled "By the Lightof My Red Nose.” Quickly following this, Sire Melvin brought down the house with his droll wit in introductory remarks. “I have gone to great expense,” he said, “to get a responsible commercial agency to look up the standing of ali who are to participate to-night [laughter], and yeu shall hear of each one’s standing before you hear him.”” The sire then read the ratings and humorous biographies of many, and the rating of some was strange- ly marked *‘Nit,”” while others were placed cabalistically, “N. G.” Sire Meloni’s address was partly poet- ical, somewhat historical and reminiscent. The humorous passages brought down the house. The Christmas-tree was laden with odd presents that made great hits, particularly | by reason of the clever wording of some of the iabels. One of the best was written by Le Roy Levings, accompanying s “straight fiush” given to Paul Cowles. It ran as follows: Here, Paul, is what for years your heart Has longed for most of all, And lacking it you've had to part With shekels large and smail. That time is past: now comes a bliss, To make men pause and ponder, And bend reloctant knee 10 this Most besutiful “Gazonda.” Judge Hunt was presented with & very heavy fishing-rod, The Judge is fond of .elling angling stories, wherefore the fol- owing card with the fishing-pole: | A DECIDED SUCCESS Speeches and Clever Papers Yule-Tide of With this nine-ounce rod, and line and hook, We trust you'll whip your favorite brook; This may look beavy for the trout you'll take, But it fits your fish stories, up to date. Fletcher Tilton, the club’s great profes- sional musician, is said to use the tele- phone a great aeal, for which reason he was presented with a miniature telephone, with the following poetic explanation: For some time past your friends have seen the bother They gave you when they used the ’phobe. The club has, therefore, got another, And this, my boy, 1s all your own. Dr. Marc Levingston drew from the tree a check for $25,000 with tke following | verse: No more with fevered brow and 1ips a-paling You'll have to work with lancet, leech and pill; You're wealthy, now, no need to tend the ailing, For here Is your fee, sir, from the pencil will. i | Sire Harry Melvin was given a small launch to enable him to get to Oakland, | “‘by reason of the calamity of frequently | missing the last boat.” ! One of the marked papers of theevening was by Judge Hunt, being an essay on the, Australian ballot, supposed to have been written by a litdle boy. It is as fol- | lows, being full of local hits. The paper was loudly applauded: Teacher told me I must write a composition on the Australian ballot. Now, I knew nothing about the Australian ballot or how it worked or how it looked, 80 I thought I would ask pa. My pa works in the new City Hall,on abench. Ithought he ought to know some- thing about the Australian ballot, because he ran for Judge in the last election and nearly gotleit. A physician named Dr. Phillip Crim- | mins told him if he hadn’t been so thin he would never have squeezed through. He also said that the men elected on the ticket must have been very good men, because none of them were below pa. When I asked pa what he thought of the Australian ballot he said he thought it was— and then he stopped and told me to go and see the professor. S0 I went and saw Professor Martin Kelly. Iasked Mr, Kelly if he liked the Australian ballot. He told me he did; he said it paid him better than his junkshopor his libel suit against the Examiner. Ididn’t know what he meant by this, so I asked him how many times the ballot haa been tried in California. Hesaid it had been tried three times in Sausalito. Iasked him when was the last time it was tried acd he said the third time. Then I asked him why so many fourth-ciass men ran on the Ausiralian ballot at the last election and he said it was because there were no fifth- class men. Inext asked him how it was that some of his candidates got such a bigger wa- jority than others on the same ticket and he said it was because they got more votes. Then I wanted to know why they called the ballot the Australian ballot and he said it was be- cause it came from Australia. I asked him which was the candidate, the nomination or the election? and he said both. I asked him how candidates liked the Austral- ian ballot? He said it depended whoily on how they came out; for instance the man elected to office for the first time thought the Australian ballot was bully, because it elected him. The man re-elected to office took no stock in it, because heknew he was not elected on the bailot, but upun the “stuft. I asked him how much an official when elect- ed got. Heseid he dia not know how much an official got, but he could tell me what- his ‘sal- ary was. Iasked him if good men were not usually beaten for office, and he said that he had seen the righteous forsaken and their seed shy of votes. The last thing I asked him was if he made more on his convention than he did on the election, but he got med at this and fired me out. Justas I was leaving he hollered and asked me what va’s name was, because he said if pe.ever ran for office azain he could get him lots of votes south of Market street. Then I left Mr. Kelly and started for the Hall | of Justice; but when I found the Hall oi Jus- tice was not built I went 1o the new City Hall. The Hall of Justice isso called because police i courts will be neld there. Iwent to the Regis- trar, Mr. Hinton, ana asked him to show me an Australian ballot, and he did so. The Aus- tralian ballot is a large sheet of paper, and it is square, at least, in form. Itis laree,so as to hold the names of a:l the candidates. The last ballot had so0 mauy names upon it that I thought at first it was the proof-sheet of heaviest on the Directory. Mr. Hinton told me that there are always five times as many candidafes as offices. He saia that with one exception there never was an election, either before the Press Club got into debt or since it got out of it, when there were just as many offices as there were candidates, and that time was at the last election of the Board of Freeholders. In the late free-for-all scramble for offices there were forty-five places and 270 candi- dates; so there ought to have been at least 225 more offices to go round. - Mr. Hinton said he did not know who in- vented the Australian ballot; he knew who in- vented barbed-wire fences, Hamburg steaks and Supervisors, but no one knows who dis- covered the Australian ballot, although since the Jast election hundreds of men have been looking for him hard. The Australian ballot is printed upon paper which is tinted pink. Before it is printed some one advertised for bids—not for the bids of Tehama street, but for offersin writing in which the man who wants the job bids the amount which he expects to make off it. When the ballot is printed every candidate hes a number, and otten all that the voter knows about the candidate is his number. Each candidate is also branded with his party designation ; thus R. stands for Republi- can, 8. for Socialist, N.-P. for Non-Partisan and N. G. fo~ the crowd. Sometimes the voter don’t care either for the number or the name of the candidate, but votes solely on the brand. A convention nominates candidates; & con- vention consists of two or more bosses, who call themselves United Labor or Independent Republican or Gold Democrats, but the only way you can tell the difference between them is by the name. When a convention won’t nominate & can- didate he gets on the ballot by petition; that is, he gets three or four thousand people who Qo not know him to sign a paper at 10 cents per head, saying that he is the best manin the country for the place; and then they leave a blank for him to fill in any place be wants. This is & cheaper way of getting on the ticket than by nomination. A nomination costs nearly as much as the horse show. For an office with a big salary like Auditor there are usually three or four candidates, but for the office of £chool Director, who gets no salary, there are usually aboutons hun- dred candidates. Iasked Mr. Hinton why so many men ran for an office without pay, and he said that if Iever served as a School Di- rector I would find out. If a voter wants to vote for any candidate on the Austraiian ballot he takes a little stamp and puts & cross at the end of the name, notin the middle of the name, as he does when he writes his own signature. When he votes for a Superior Judee he finds seventeen candi- | dates for that office. He cannot vote for the whole seventeen, but he can vote for one only. Such a vote is called a plumper. No one believes in plump- ing except the man who gets the plump; then De says the voter is a good citizen. Butif the other fellow gets the plump he seys the voter is a — fool. Itis said that in the last election there were oceasional instances of plumping. Some voters voted for two Judges, some stood three and a few went four, but 3400 voters could not pick one. If a voter voted for five Judges his vote would be no good, because ‘our were as many as the public could stand &t one elec- tion. On the Australian ballot the names of the candidates are printed alphabetically; some candidates say that position on the ballot affects the result, end that a man whose name commences with Q never can be elected to any office, except 10 an unexpired term on the Board of Freeholders. But this rule did not work in the election of 1894, when 8 standing for Sutro beat E standing for Ellert. Before a voter can vote he must be regis- tered; that is, he must ‘go to the Registrar’s office and give his name, if he can remember it; then the Regisirar looks at his teeth to learn his age, measures him'to get his height, and if the voier has any peculiar mark about him as marks of inteliect, the Registrar care- {fully notes it. The next trouble for the voter is to find his poiling place. Theone nearest his house is usuaily the wrong.ome.. When, however, he finds his polling place he can go in and vote, provided some one else has not already voted for him to save him the trouble and provided he answers his new City Hall description, and provided he is not in the wrong distriet or in the wrong county and is able to read and write. If he is allowed to vote, they give him an Australian ballot and he goes into a little | vlace that looks like a stall, and there he wrestles with his ballot. In selecting the candidates the voter is usually intelligent and discriminating; thus he will vote for one man oecause he don’t know bim, against another because he does, for another because he runs independent, for another because all the conventions have nominated him, for another because he likes his picture and for another becauss his name commences (with A. And lasiy, he is ex- pecied to put some money in a cigar box upen the clerk’s table, which is marked “('harity” or “For the Poor.”” The box is marked in this way because all of the money put into it goes to the Big Jim Fund, to provide cots in the wards south of Market street for disabled stuffers. A clever paper was read by Wells Drury, of being a travesty on hlful!uin' journalism, l as practiced by the grandiloquent in rural regions. Many of the strong points of the paper were made emphatic by the delight- ful reading, and were of that evanescent character that cold type cannot portray. A paper by Grant L. Carpenter was of a similar character. It was well read and the humorous points brought down the house. The violin music of Mollenhauer was one of the great hits of the evening, aswas the singing of the quartet aud of Abramoff, McBride, Homer Henley and John J. Raffael. Feiris Hartman enter- tained the audience with humorous sketches, Edward Moron made a brief ad- dress, and the entire evening was passed pleasantly. The following, among other dis- tinguished guests, were present during the evening: Attorney E. S. Pillsbury, General C. H. Taylor, Carroll “Cook, Adam Herold, George H. Bromley, -8. M. Shoriridge, Mayor-elect James Phelan, N. C.Judd, Superior Judge John Hunt,Superior Judge Belcher, Judge C. W. Slack, Horace Piatt, ! General 8. W. Backus, Mr. Kirkpatrick, Dr. Philip Mills Jones, John P. Dunning, William Greer Harrison,Van R. Paterson, Merwin Curtis, Nathan Landsberger, C. A.Webster, Superior Juage J. C. Hebbard, Amadee Joullin, Dr. Marc Levingston, W. 8. Wood, W. F. Bogart, G. H. Pippy, E. A. Phillips, W. F. McNair, Otto Dobbertin, E. H. Hamilton, Horace Plett, T. D. Riordan, Judge Bahrs, Nat Brittain, Alex T. Polloch, James Brown, Peter ¥. Dunne, 8. E. Moffet, Judge Joachimsen and F. L. Merrill of Cincin- nati, Brigadier-General Korsyth, F. K. Lane, Major Bates, ex-Judge R. B. Car- penter, Raleigh Barcar, W. H. Gagan, Henry James, Byron Mauzy, Walter Sabin, Joseph Howell, W. W. Naugh- ton, John McNaught, James Mac- Mulien, Dr. — Somers, Nat Brittan, Harry Curtaz, H. L. Schemmel, Mr. Mur- phy, W. P. Lawler, Judge Sandersen, W. H. Levy, James M. Hamilton, Dr. Lustig, Julius Kahn, Dr. P. William Nathan. Mayor-elect James Phelan, who had come in with General Forsyth, General C. N. Taylor of the Boston Globe and others, was called for and made a very happy speech, in which he referred to the recent campaign and the attitude of the press. _ His address was coupled with amusing stories and prbvoked much mirth. He referred to General Taylor as the founder of agreat newspaper and intimated that if he were called on he might teil interest- ing things about Boston, the newspapers and how they do politics there. Colonel Taylor took the stand and made a good speech. He alluded to the fact that he had filled every position on a daily paper and said the happiest expe- rience of his life was when he was simply doing reportorial work. He said it was the duty of those collect- ing the news to make the papers as clean as possible. " He also told amnusing stories and they were received with much ap- plause. Judge C. A, Low, attired as Santa Claus, distribated Christmas presents from a tree, calling the recipients to the stand in each case and readinga bit of humorous verse. The gifts and the verses were of great variety, and in the nature of takeoffs on the members. 3 In spontaneity, polish, warmth of en- thusiasm and respectable conviviality last night’s yule-tide jinks outshone every previous effort of the club in that direc- ti The speeches were timely and witty, justlong enough as a rule, and the entire spirit of the entertainment was harmonious and beautiful. While none of the papers bore the evidence of the mid- night oil neither were any slighted in that finish that stamps the writer as one accustomed to using his pen. In connection with the success of the jinks and of the club itselfii is not unin- teresting to recall a few facts concerning the origin and early history of the organi- zation. In the langnage of Fred Myrtle, historian of the club: **The start was for a few years a hard struggle against pov- erty. prejudice, opposition’ and lack of contidence. The club of to-day began in July, 1888, starting in two rooms on Bush street, near Montgomery. Boon after this crude start larger quariers were taken in what is now the Fauntleroy, Stockton and O’Farrell streets; but there was no marked progress until the tormer quarters of the Bohemian Club, 430 Pine street, were secured. The career as a social organization then began, though until the reign of President Cassius M. Coe and a businesslike board of directors the organization was always in financial shallows. For more than two years the present quarters, 126 Kearny street, have been occupied, and to-day the institution has money in the bank. The following are the officers who to-day guide its destinies: President, C. M. Coe; first vice-president, J. P. Booth; second vice-president, James McMullen; third vige-president, W. ¥. Bogart; secretary, F. 8. Myrtle; treasurer, P. S, Montague; librarian, W. K. Briggs; directors—C. A. Low, Paul Cowles, Dr. P. M. Jones, L. L. Levings, C. A. Webster, E. D. Dement. For several years after the club was or- ganized many journalists beld themaselves aloof, laughing at those who struggled to build up such an association, referring to th- failures of the past. To-day, however, many of the very best reporters and editors in the country are on either the active or non-resident lists and no man however great his fame need be ashamed to be on the rcll of the San Francisco Press Club, which isknown all over the country as one of the most progressive bodies of news- paper men in the United States. It has rejoined the International League of Press Clubs, and in June last two of its members, President Coe and F. C. Roberts, atiended the annual convention of the league at Buffalo, N. Y. The reception accorded them by the Eastern journalists showed bevond a doubt the esteem in which the California organization is held. The following is a list of those who con- stitute the active, associate and non-resi- dent members of the club: Charles A. Aiken, E. M. Adams, H. 8. Allen, R. Porter Ashe, John Aiton, Dr. W. Anderson, Dr. J. D. Arnold, A.Sidney Ashe, P. C. Allen, A. H. Barendt, H. L. Brook, S. W, Backus; O. Biack, H. L. Baggerley, W. F. Burke, James P. Booth, W. F. Bogart, H. P. Bush, F. V. Brooke, Barry Baidwin, W. 5. Barnes, Raleigh Barcar, W. G. Benton, 'W. K. Briggs,’ J. J. Burke, Al Bowier, W. M. Bunker, T. B. Bishop, T. M. Bradley, E. E. Bush, D. M. Burne, Frank H. Burke, Dr. G. E. Bushnell, Sig- mund Beel, E. A. Belcher, H. U. Bran- denstein, A. P. Black, Benjamin Benjamin, A. L. Bensor, James IL. Barry, W, C. Bunner, W. J. Betchelder, R. J. Burns, Dr. L. Berry, Callaghan Byrnes, . Conlan, E. Ciark, . V. Coleman, C. M. Coe, E. L. Coinon, L. G. Car- peater, A. Crothers, Joseph T. Cooney, J. V. Quife: rroli Cook, C. W. Cross, Paul Cowles, C. F. Curry, Dr. H. P. Carleton, T. E.K. Cor- mag, Frank Coflin, H. T. Creswell, H. J. Curtaz, 8. V. Costello, B. Cromweil, John P. Dunning, Wells Drury, Alfred Dobson, John H. Dursr, W. 8. Dreypolcher, F. H. Dunne, W. L. Dye, E. D. Dement, J. H. Dickinson, J. 8. Dunnigan, J.J. Dwyer, J. W. Erwin, J. L. Eppinger, John Finlay, John Fouga, T. E. Flynn, L. E. Fitch, Alex Forsythe, 8. H. Friedlander, Robert Fer- ral, George B. Fraser, W. H. Gagen, Paul Go! smith, Eugene Garber, Dr. G. F. Graham, W liam Grant, F. Gutterson, Carlton Green, G. W. Grayson, G. C. Groezinger, Hugh Hume, E. H. Hamilton, Johu Hunt, C. F. Hanlon, L. M. Hoefller, W. H. H. Hart, W. Greer Harrison, J, C. B. Hebbard. Dr. 8.-W. Hilliard, 8. Homer Henley, J. H. Howe, S. M. Haskell, E. C. Hughes, James M. Hamiiton, F. A. Healy, John J. Harrison, J. Ross Jackson. H. L. Joachimsen, N. A.Judd, Dr. Philip Mills Jones, Chris Jorgensen, S.Jackson, W. H. jordan, Henry James, G. A. Knight, Julius Kahn, Joseph P. Kelly, M. B. Kellogg, W. Kauiman, Thomas Kirkpatrick, C. A. Lo Jere Lynch, A. B. Lemmon, L. L. Levings, 0. Larkin, Dr. M. Levingston, R.Linder,Dr. D. D. Lustig, Lewis Lloyd, W. H. Levy, Arthur McEwen. Edward F. Moren, William H. Mills, P. 8. Montague, W. W. McNair, F. P. Medina, Carl Martens, H. A. McCraney, James McMullen, G. H. Maxwell, J. D. Maxwell, B. Mollenhauer, G. McEnerney, Harry Manr, F. 8. Myrtle, E. P. Morey, W.J. Martin, E. J. Molera, E. A. Mutch, D. McLeod, John Morris- sey, Willlam McDonald, Harry Melvin, J. W, Meicalf, W. W. Naughton, H. Z. Osborne, 0Connor, L. D. Owens, W. D. Pennycook, W. Price, G. H. Pippy, A. E. Pounstone, Edgar Painter, A. H. Powers, L. E. Phillips, C. C. Powning, Van R. Paterson, F. H. Powers, Jumes D, Phelan, F. C. Roberts, Gordon Ross, T. D, Riordan, W, C. Ralston, A. Rodgers, J. J. Raffael, J. D. Reinstein, J. B. Reynoids, W. Reis, C. M. Short- ridge, Stover, S. M. - Shortridge, L E. John F. Sheehan, Martin Stevens, Dr, J. Simp- son, A. A. Sanderson, J. M. Shatterly, Charles W. Slack, V. Sutherland, W. J. Stone, L. D, Syle. E. Schmitz, L. W. Storer, J.S. Swan, J. F. Smith, J. A. Sheldon, Stouey, John Timmins, Issac Trumbo, S. E. Tucker, R. F. Tiiton, J. W. Travers, H. A. Tre- vanlyan, J. M. Troutt, H. Trumbo, B, C. Tru- man E. M. Van Frank, T. H. Van Frank, T. T. Williams, C. A. Webster, E. B. Willis, J. A. Waymire, D. M. Warde, D. H. Walker, 3 Wiison, G. O. Watkins, Mark Walser, C. §. Young, W. G. Zeigle H. . E. e e, Christmas Carol. ' The Christmas festival of the Pilgrim Sun- day-school of the First Unitarian Church will be held at Native Sons’ Hall, 414 Mason street, on Tuesday, December 22. There will be games for the little folks at 5:30P. M. AtS8 o’clock & dramatization of Mrs, Kate Douglas Wiggin's “Bird’s Christmas Carol” will be given by members of the school. After the play dancing will close the evening’s enter- teinment. The proceeds are to be divided be- tween the Silyer-street Kindergarten, of which Mrs. Wiggin was the founder, and the Sunday-school. —————— A LOST SEA GULL. For Twehty-Four Years He Had Win- tered at B rentons Reef Lightship. Captain Fogarty and his men are mourn ing the probable eath of Dick, the sea gull that became famous for having passed twenty-four consecutive winters on or in the vicinity of Brentons Reef lightship, about two miles off the south shore of New- port. Dick began to attract attention nearly twenty-four years ago, because about Octobar 1of each year he would ap- pear off the lightship and remain near it tillabout April 1, when he would fly north- ward for the summer. As years passed and there wasnobreak in the regularity of Dick’s .coming and going his fame grew and not a few persons visited the lightship tosee him. gantain Focarty and his pre- decessors have been called upon to write many iettersregarding the gull and there have been hundreds of inguiries fiom people as to whetner the stories about Dick were true, said a recent dispatch from Newport, E. L La‘s’z w‘-’inter it was noted that Dick was quite feable with age and it was suggested that he be shot and stuffed for exhibition in the Smitisoman Institution, for it was thought that he would pever be able to get bacic to the lightship, even if he sur- vived the winter. But Captain Fozarty and his men refused to harm Dick. They wanted very much to have the guil's body mounted, but they were so much a!:mphed to him that they would do him no injury. They were willing to await his natural death, trusting that he would die where they could secure his _romnins. It ap- pears, though, from his failure to ap- pear at the lightship so far this fall, that he has died in other parts, and the half- dosen scientists and institutions who hoped to have his remains will be disap- pointed. It may be that Dick had been a regular visitor at the lightship for more than twenty-four years, but if so he had not made” himself known. The first thatis remembered of him was in the winter of 1871-72. He was a gray gull, a_ species that is not considered very rare. Early in his career at the lightship be bad remark- ably smooth and bright plumage, but as years went by he gradually lost his beauty, and during the last few winters he pos- sessed a very shabby coat. He was roy- ally treated by the captain and men of the lightsuip, who had his meals, of salt pork mostly, prepared on time, and when the hour arrived for Dick to eat he would call for his food under the side of the boat. Besides his regular habits, Dick had other very remarkable characteristics, one ot which was his desire always to be alone. Uniike others of his kind, he was never seen with other gulis.—Philadelphia Tele- graph. —————————— EDISON, THE DREAMER. How to Get Eid of Some Telegraphic Drudgery- oy Some one had referred to him as Victor Hugo when he made his appearance (as an operator in our telegraphic office in Boston), and it was by that name that we generally spoke of him. Every device was employed to thwart his soarings after the infinite and his divings for the unfathom- able, as we regarded them, and to getan amount of work out of him that was equiv- alent to the sum paid par diem for his ser- vices, and among them was that of having - him receive the press report from New York. He did not like this, the work con tinuing steadily from 6:30 o'clock ». until 12 A. M., and leaving him no time i which to pursue his studies. Orne night about 8 v’clock there down an inquiry asto where the report was, and, going to the where Elison was at work, Night ager Leignton was horritied to find there was nothing ready to go upstairs, for the reason that Edison bad copied between 11620 and 2000 words of stock and other marked reports in a hand so small that he had onty filled a third of a page. Leighton laughed 1n spite of himself, ang saying, ‘*Heavens, Tom; don’t do thatl again I"” hastened to cut the copy up into minute fragments and have it pre- pared in a more acc-ptable manner. While this was occurrine Edison went on 1eceiving, and the frequent trips of the poisy dummy box, whici communicated with the pressrooms on the next floor, gave evidence that he was nolonger gaug- ing his handwriting with an ultimate { view to putting the Lord’s prayer on a 3- cent piece. But all at once there was a great noize, and it was evident that Press Agent Wal- lace, a most profane man, was coming down the stairs, swearing and shouting as he came. Everybody grew excited exs cept Edison, who was perhaps dreaming of the possibilities in some of the realms of electrical enaeavor in which he hag since won renown. But we did not have long to wait to know the cause of Wallace’s visit. Kick- ing open the door, he appeared to us, but he was speechless. The last note of his voice and the last remnantof a vocabu- lary of blasphemy which was famous throughout the city was gone. Standing there with both hands full of small, white pages of paper, he cou!d only beckon. Leighton approached him, and tenderly tyok the sheets of paper from him, to find that Edison had made the radical change from his first style of copy to simply put- ting o:e word on each sheet, directly in the center. He had furnisaed in this way several hundred pages in a very few min- utes. He was relieved from duty on the press wire and put on another circuit, while the much-tried Leighton devoted himself to & bringing Wallace back to a normal condi- tion, admitting of the use of his voice and the flow of his usual output of profanity.— Electrical Review. ——— A whale of average size has a jawbone twenty-five feet in Jéngth. came NEW TO-DAY. LOOK WELL, FEEL WELL, Be Well, Strong of Nzrve Plenty of Vitality to Keep You Well. You Begin to Fail and Light of Heart, With When in Vigor, You Can Regain It by Using This Remedy. 2 S It sends a continuous stream of vital energy into the nervous system for hours at a time. |:r.\W//£vl e e / ! The f6untain of animal life is in your nerves. When you are weak your nerves need toning up. 0 men who have wasted the vivacious energy of youth by excesses or high living; to of vitality growing fainter, and years, found the spirit of manly men who have found the spark who have, while yet young in power lessening as if age had come on and brought with it the decay of all physical and vital energies; to such men, and to all men who feel that their vital forces are slow of action and lacking in the fire of youth Dr. Sanden’s Electric Belt is worth it weight in gold. A means of restoring youthful vigor is priceless. Nothing in this world is worth more to a man who lacks that element. And yet here is a remedy which thousands of men need, and they fail to grasp it because of fear that it might fail. “I had a continual pain in my back and up my spine for three years until I got my belt of vou. I7 sound, which I could not until I got yi Iputit on at night aad it gave me relief at once. I can now sleep our Belt. I shall alwags sveak well of it, writes A. B. Graves, 214 North Third street, San Jose, Cal., Dec. 8, 1896. It is hard to believe that Dr. Sanden’s Electric Belt will do what is claimed for it until tried it. “I was iroubled witk my stomach for you speak to some one who has more than ten years with terrible pains and vomiiing, besides other general weakness.' Since using your Belt, which I got last February, I have beén free from all those troubles. I consider it a grand thing for those in need,” writes M. C. Beckwith, Fresno, Cal., Nov. 25, 1896. Your most intimate friends are using it and being cured. They don’t mention it because that they are in need of such a “Fifteen years ago I was hurt by a fall, system. My sexual powers were gone whe: I conld not stoop to lift anythine. I felt on, and in two months my power was entirely restored. few men want any one to know remedy. injuring my spine and weaking my whola n 1 got your Beit last April. I was so weak better in three days after putting the Belt I was entirely cured,” says S. H. Austen, Mate Ship Hueneme, San Francisco, Dzc. 2, 1896. It makes men strong ; it re moves the effects of early habits, indiscretions, excesses, overwork and all abuse of the laws of Nature. It helps Nature to mend and makes manhood perfect. The failurg of medicine, of quacks, and even of other, so- called, electric belts, is no argument against Dr. Sanden’s Elee- tric Belt. No other treatment, class with it. Everything else Belt will cure. It HAS cured remedies without avail. No man who is weak will his power until he tries Dr, Sanden’s Electric Belt. of this great remedy will make other. no other belt, is in the same may fail, and still Dr. Sanden’s thousands who had tried other make the right effort to regain A fair trial it unnecessary to ever use any “At the time I bought your Belt I was so nervous and shaky that I conld not do any work without feeling perfectly extiausted. I had what is called Nervous Debility from excessive drinking and sexnal excesses. [ was practically on my tast I gs. My powers were all gone and I was a wreck. slightest benefit, when I got your Belt, I I had spent over $300 for drugs without the felt an improvement as soon as I applied it and I continued improving until now I fecl as strong and well as I ever did in my life. I feel very grateful to you for what 621 Kearny street, Decembsr 8, 1696, Be true to Nature, be true Regain your health. Give the the sparkle to your eye. Reg: using the wonderful Electric Belt. your Belt has done for me,” says H. Knowlton, to yourself and your friends. color of vigor to your cheeks, ain your manhood for good by All men who are weak should have Dr. Sanden’s celebrated book, “Three Classes of Men,” which will be sent closely sealed, free, on application. SANDEN BELECTRIC CO., 632 MARKET ST., OPPOSITE PALACE HOTEL, SAN FRANCISCO. Ofiice hours—8 A, M. t0 6 P. M. ; evenings, 7 to 8:30; Sundays, 10 to 1. 204 South Broadway; Portland, Or., 253 Washington stree. Consultation NOTE.—Muke no mistake in the number— eSS Market strect Los Angeles Offic Iree and invited, 3