Omaha Daily Bee Newspaper, March 10, 1910, Page 7

THE OMAHA DuLY BEE. BY EDWARD ROSEW. ATFIL 'UI'NI’\ VICTOR ROSEWATER, EDITOR Entered at Omaha polloflh'r as second- tlass matter. TERMS OF SUBSCRIPTION. Dally Bee (including Sunday), per week.lic Dally Pee (without Sun@ay), per m Daily Boe (without Sunday). one Dally Pes and Sunday, one y DELIVERED BY Evening Bee (without Sun Evening day), v-r week.. unday Bee, 0o turday Bee, one year.... ‘Address all complaints of Irregularities in Jelivery to City Cirevlation Department. l"!Cll gmaha~The Bes Buiding. South O ty-fourth and N. Conmeis BIrta- 15 Beolt Street Lincoin—18 Little Buliaing Chicago— 1548 Marquette Building. | New York—Rooms 1101-1102 No. 34 West Yhirty-third Street, Washington—725 Fourteenth Street N. W. CORRESPONDENCE. Communications relating to news and ditorial matter should - be addressed mahe Bee, Editorigl Departmént. EMITTANCES, Remit by Gn" express or postal order Beyable to The Bee Publighing Company, nly $-cent-stamps recelved in payment of il aecount al choaks, except on ha ar eastern exchange, not nceepted « one BTATEMENT OF CIRCULATION. Weate of Nsbrulm. Douglas County, ss.: 6«% Tasehuck, treasurer of The Boe hiishing ~ Company. being duly gworn, kays that the -ctu-l nwmber of g and complete f The Dally, orning, Evenln Bee rlnhd‘ ay { during the man of robrury. 1910, was Returned copies. s. Net total ... Daily average Qlolfll B, mchLK. ‘Treasuror. resence and aworn to ot Fobrulry‘ 1910 HUNTER, Public. bscribern leaving the city tem- porarily should have The Bee mailed to ghem. Address will be changed as oftem as requeste B ———————— Ineldentally, what' has become of the meat ‘boyoott? Subscribed {n m, before me this jll‘ Notary == e The ice In the upper Missourl is be- ginning to come down, but it is of poor quality and theére is no corner on ft, — If ‘the nmnnfi of the alimony paid by the Néw York millionaires is the basls of jud@ment, It must be an awful relief. A T e It beging.to look as though young Knox weré n.for a fow lessons in “di- plomacy,” ‘with his father as in- structor, ‘ Ee— It 1s only. a question of time when Jupiter fl‘qgl am come to the aid and rese| gleaning de- p-rtmlnt, 2 4 -omz would only send some Black Hand.)etters to the phonograph purveyors of Caruso's voice the remon- strance would not be so loud. Prof. um.un holds that the peo- ple of Mars are @n intelligent race of beings. ‘Well, supposing that the premise-1§ ghantéd, -then what? Is it notiabout time for that prom- fsed tri; Mt. McKinley to begin. It is almost summer and Dr, Cook Is in South America on his way north. It {s true there are no very old ruins in this country, but it is pretty widely accepted that Tammany hall would make a good oné if properly treated. Retail dealers deny they are in any combine to raise prices. That settles it, there 'i{s mno combine anywhere. Everybody jump’ in. The water {s A member of the Omaha fire depart- ment has been dismissed for insisting on coverlng ©p his uniform. A real fireman ought to be proud of his calling. ‘Wonder if the strike breakers in Philadelphia are pocketing the fares that belong to the street rallway in the same gentlemanly manner they did in Omaha. —_—— Those sclentists who tried eating steaks cut from the frozen body of an antediluvian monster are certainly carrying the cold storage business a little too far. Argument in favor of an /18 that gasoline is cheaper ./ JBut supposing a man has 'Ul‘ 1o buy a full measure man. Then what? {peioimepong— i nfi may judge from the congres- slonal paeord; it is not discourteous to roast & genatorial colleague 8o long as & rhetorically and with a 1ib- of Latin and Gréek terms. to be wondered that Bena- ‘ot Texas is accused of never a Bible since he quit Bun- Juat note where he lives \ber that he was brought up county taxpayers want the .of a job on thelr new court they are willing to have the t kept on the work all the t bélng too particular as appeared in Oh, Democracy, What a Falldown. Only a few days ago The Bee called Attention tn the announcement made by Senator Owen of Oklahoma that he would at the proper time move a sub- stitute for the postal savings bank biil, not with any expeectation of having it accepted, but to give the senate “at least an opportunity to conform to the proposal of the demoeracy in its last national platform” which committed the democrats to the deposit guaranty scheme and also to the postal savings bank “if a guaranteed bank cannot be secured.” In that comnection we sald we would await the vote on the de- posit guaranty amendment in expec- tancy to see how many democrats would put themsolves on record for and against Mr. Bryan's pet hobby of 1908. We regret to be compelled to record the most woeful falldown on the part of Senator Owen and his democratic colleagues in their attempt to get themselves straight on this vital meas- ure. Here are the excerpts from the Congressibnal Record: Mr. Owen: I offer this plan as a substi- tute for the pending bill. T have no hope, of course, that this proposal will be ac- {copted; T have no hdpe that it will be even considered; but, nevertheless, believing as T do that it 1s far superior In every respect to the bill it stands, I offer it and must rest content to see it speedily dle at the hands of the rothless majority, Mr. Carter: I move that the amendment proposed as A substitute be lald on the table. The motlon agreed to. Not even a roll eall demanded. Not even an aye and nay vote to let the public know how many democrats were opposed to deposit guaranty in spite of Mr. Bryan’s contention that a platform is binding, and how many republicans, if any, are in favor of it. Not even the result of the vote to show whether deposit guaranty was laid on the table by two to one or by ten to one. In fact, the record is a silent ad- mission that the democrats in the sen- ate did not want a recorded vote on the Owen substitute and had carefully arranged to avold it. And, as if this falldown were not quite swfMclent, 1t was followed on the final vote of the passage of the postal savings bank bill in the senate by the democrats lining up solldly against the measure with the sole exception of Seénator Chamberlain of Oregon. Sen- ator Owen of Oklahoma had read the Denver platform plank and pledged fealty to it, asserting his firm Inten- tion to vote for the bill while looking for an excuse to vote against it, while another great democratic leader, Sen- ator Stone of Missouri, had declared that he was opposed to the postal sav- ings bank and regarded It as unconsti- tutional no matter what shape it might take, and would never favor it, Den- ver platform or no platform. “The democrats in the senate have -ld pped most adroitly, but lt re- maing to be seen whether when 'the postal savings bank bill comes up in the - house, .the democrats of that branch of congress will be as success- ful in the game of hide-and-seek. to lay on the table . was Experiments in Watercraft. A South Dakota man asserts that he has invented an ‘‘aquaplane” by which he proposes to revolutionize river nav- igation. If we are to believe the fn- ventor, the craft in question has the peculiar ability of climbing and skid- ding along on the surface of the water instead of cutting through it, and it 1s expected that this peculiarity will add much to the speed. Experiments soon to be made will be carefully watched and, it successful on a small scale, will add an {mpetus to water travel for pleasure and commerce. With all our progress in travel, 1 cluding the conquest of the air, water navigation, although one of the oldest forms, has been the slowest to develop. The advent of the steam and gas en- gihes have done much, but the princi- pal improvements 8o far have been in the matter of size and speed of water craft, and the increased speed has not been proportionate to the added ex- pense. The limit of speed with the old-style boats seems to have been ap- proached because of the difficulty in oyercoming friction and resistance. For some time the ‘“‘skimming” method of getting over the water sur- face has been advocated, but little progress has been made along that line. The advantages expected would reduce the resistance and make shal- low channels navigable as well as deep ones. The emphasis now being placed on water trafic places a premium on attaining & maximum of spéed at a min. fmum of cost. It may be that the South Dakota man s working in the right direction. The Bankruptoy Law, The proposed amendment of the tederal bankruptcy law is causing dis- cussion 'in congress, some going so far 84 to advocate the repeal of the entire law as it now stands. The reasons advanced for repeal seem based on matters of purely sectional import and do not appeal to the nation as a whole, The congressmen from the south are largely in favor of repeal at least to the extent that the law may be invoked only In case of a general panie. The chiet argument advanced for re- peal s that the voluntary bankruptey provision of the law s occasionally abused, thereby “thwarting the ulti- mate aim of the whole law.” There are undoubtedly cases of voluntary proceedings which are plainly fraudulent, intentjonally so, -|but that does not necessarily mean 2 of that . kind 3 “Lee s a man that the whole law is worthless. The badkruptey l1aw has eome to be a part of the foundation of our credit system ot business and fully 76 per cent of America’s business {s on a credit basis. Without a bankruptey law the least suspicion of a financial strihgeney on the part of a debtor would precipitate & game of grab by the creditors and the first one on hand with a lien would get it all or as much as needed to cover his claim, leaving the rest to take what they could get, As It is now under the law, the ereditors must share alike, hence, rather than force a debtor into bank ruptey, it is to their interest to give him every opportunity and encourage- ment possible to get on his feet. In this way the law has again and again proved a protection to the creditor himself. If the law Is defective it can be strengthened, but there seems to be no demand for its repeal. Change in Inauguration Date. The endorsement by the house ju- diclary committee of the proposed change in the date of the presidential inauguration renews the controversy over the desirability and feasibility of such action. The resolution proposing the change names the last Thursday in April as preferred wo the existing date. There Is a general sanction of the resolution in the east and espe- clally in those citles contiguous to the national capital. The officials at Washington heartily favor a change on the ground that it would make the public ceremony possible in keeping with the importance of the event, without endangering the health of the official participants or of the pub- lic in attendance. The date of the inauguration of our executive seems in many ways to be inauspicious. March s a stormy month and the exposure of hundreds and thousands incident to a public pageant and ceremony I8 apparent. The proposed change would be of chief benefit to the commercial inter- ests of Washington, for a great crowd always carrles with it a great deal of business. But the difficultigs in the way must not be underestimated. Even granting that in many ways a new inauguration date is desirable, it is hardly probable that it will come in a short period of time. It would in- volve readjustment of the term of the executive and all his appointees as well as-a radical departure from tradi- tion. It may come in time, but it is extremely doubtful if the people, the point of recasting the constitution to get ahead of the weather man, Governmental Economy. The public statement of President Taft favoring a budget system and a general department reorganization, followed by the remark of Senator Aldrich that it is possible to economize in all our national affairs $300,000, 000 annually, has directed attention to the colossal expenditures of the government mtnvngnee and waste- fulness are the products of vrolbeflty for individuals and businéss organiza- ception to the rule. All admit the general desirability of economy, but such a_ desire and its realization are 'I"IIE BEE. OMAIIA, ’I‘HURBDAY country over, are yet aroused to the|' tions, and our government 18 no ex-|' prove_that the enforced retirement of Buperintendent Crabiree from the headship of the Peru normal is a great | inistake and an irreparable blow to the | cause of education settle it. That ought to — Gold has been discovered in the northern part of Néew Hampshire, but there is no great rush of miners to that country. There is too much money in the summer boarder business to pay much attention to gold mlnlngy in the good old state of New Hamp- | shire, e e It turns out that on the eve of the big fght' fn Nébraska the anti-S8aloon | league i having trouble within Its own rapks. So, however, are the brewers likewise sald to be at sixes and sevéns betwest themselves. The same arbitrator ‘might get a double Job. Those two Bervian princes who are coming to America to get rich wives certainly have the right idea for the land of real queens and of wealth also, But just who are these Servian princes, anyway, or does it matter so 16ng as they are “princes?” Last week Theodore Roosevelt was only made editor of a New York new: paper, & trustee in an insurance com- pany and the chancellor of a western university. What 1s the matter with doing all thrge? He could handle them right. — Some people are wondering whether the canals on the planet Mars gest as much proportionately as the Panama canal. What is the difference unless their usefulness may be proportion- ately as great as that of the Panama canal? — The total of deposits in Nebraska state banks is larger than ever before. The aggregate wealth of the people of Nebraska was never so large as it is today, and the bank deposits are only one of the straws that testify to the fact. — Lure of the Coin. St. Louls Globe-Democrat. Commander Peary insists upon reserving the privilege of making commercial use of his north pole discoverles. Sclentists are not unlike other classes of people when there is & doliar in sight. Difference in Methods, Brooklyn Eagle. President Taft is worrying because school children do not learn to spell right. His predecessor was mare liberal in the matter of orthography. He was willing to admit any spelling not in the dictionaries. i e e Two Brands of Liberty. Springtield Republican. The action:of the Philadelphia authori- tles in prohibiting aimass meeting of strik- ers and sympathizers -on Independence square Saturday proves again that far less freedom of @peech-and. of assemblage ob- tains In the gremt! citles of democratic Ameérica thariwd England. = Trafalgar square stands for & liberty that independ- ence square knows ot in our day. e —— PERSONAL NOTES. The long' lost husband of a Camden (N. J.) woman turned.up in time to find his two distinetly different things. How- ever, it 1s agreed that the possibility of retrenchment is dependent chiefly upon some sort of a budget system, such as is now employed in practical business as well as in the govern- mental affairs of other nations, A commission has been suggested by President Taft to comsist of three from each house and three to ‘be ap- pointed to take charge of the reorgan- ization and outline a budget system. The disposition of congress to control may do away with the appointive members, but since all changes would have to be sanctioned by congress anyway, retalning the three appointive members ought to enlist executive co- operation without intrusion on con- gressional prerogative. Regardless of the roundabout man- ner in which it will have to be se- cured, however, the main thing is to hold down the tremendous expense of government so as to eliminate need- less outgo. As it is, each congressman gets all he can for his own district, without a thought as to the whole. While a budget system would not end this “habit” at once, it would tend to keep expenditures within the limit of the income. While we cannot afford to abandon the Panama canal or any of the other great enterprises under way, there is unquestionably much du- plication of work that could be avoided. President Taft has started in with the right idea, and it is to be hoped that it will be permitted to pro- duce resuits, The protest of Omaha’s commerelal bodles against the proposed Increased freight rate on packing house products between the Missouri river and Chi- cago has been put up to the railroads. The railroads will now have an oppor- tunity to make good on some of those professions of well-meant intentions. It is up to Bdgar Howard to relieve the suspense by naming the ‘“promi- nent democratic lawyer” and the “‘well known republican officeholder” who are engaged in the work of “‘fixing” nominees for the state senate on both party tickets in the interest of the cor- porations. The Nebraska retallers, in session in Omaha, insist they can prove an alibl on the charge of boosting the cost of living. But that is exactly what everyone else says who is suspected of having & hand on the price derrick. The real culprit must yet be in hiding. The Nebraska Teacher, a publica- tion in which Mr. Crabtree used to have & proprietary interest - which he presumably still retains, is guoted to life insurance polidy pald and the money spent. The suprems coirt of Georgla wisely tralls on lnes of'leust resistance. The court declared that a woman has a legal right to changé her mind. The Laetare medal, awarded annually by Notre Dame university to some emin- ent member of the Cathollc church, this year goes to Dr, Maurice Francis Egan, United States lflrullt. to Denmark. Can modern melodrama come up to the real thing? At a New York fire, a boy runs the elevator. through smoke and flames, Makes rescue after rescue. Ropes part, elevator falls from seyenth story. Sayety appliances work at the last mo- ment. , b A professor of the University of Michi- gan, recently engaged as taxicologist in the Kansas City polsoning case, is swamped with samples of food from anxious hus- bands who imagine thelr wives are fore- closing on life insurance policies and other assets. “Afry, falry,” Lfillan Russell now finds her joyous days barring her way to the halls of fame in her nature Iowa. The proposal to plase Lillian's portrait in the hall of the Iowa Historical society pro- duced an objection from the W. C. T. U, not because Liflian annexed three or more husbands, but because she warbled a song in praist “of wine. Lilllan was quite young then. She is nearly forty-nine now and reasonable sedate. ! Our Birthday Beok March 10, 1910. John J. Pitagerald, member of congress trom. the, Brooklyn district, was born in that city March 10, 1872 Mr. Fitzgerald ls best known as the man Who offered the amendment and led the faction of the demo- crats that saved the day for “Uncle Joe" Cannon's rules at the opening of the last sesston of congress. Jumes .. Richardson, head of the Scot- tish Rite Masons for the United States, is 67 years old. He used to be congressman from Tennessee and was at one time floor leader for the democratio minority. Henry E. Krehblel, the musical eritic and author, was born March 10, 1864 at Ann Arbor, Mich. He achleved his reputa- tion ‘chiefly: as musical eritic for the New York Tribune. He contributes largely to maguzimes and other publications. Henry B. Chamberlin, newspaper man, for & few years located here in Omaha, but now in Chicago, was born March 10, 1867, in Whashington. He is publishing a little monthly magastne called “The Voter.” He marries Miss Irene Byrnc, one of Omaha's popular school teachers. Jesse P. Palmer, luwyer, was born March 10, 1578 He studied st the University of Oberlin and the University of Michigan and before going into practice for himself was associated with T. W. Blackburn and Jater with John L. Kennedy. Walter V. Graham, accountant, was born March 10, 1569, He is a native Nebraskan and attended the University of Nebraska. For ten years he was in the auditing de- pastment of the Burlington, and is now with the Havens-White Coal company. B. 8. Critchfield, deputy Internal revenue gollector, 18 47 years old. He was born in Pehnsylvania, and before taking his preserit position taught school for twelve years \IAB(‘H 10, 1910. A note of alarm is sounded by several Washington correspondents of New Eng- land papers regarding the congressional apportionment based on the census of 1910, Should the total membership of the house | of representatives remain as fixed at pres- ent, the Increase of population will also increase the basis of representation. States showing stationary or decreased population would suffer a decrease In congressmen. Membe from the states thus menaced are getting together for the purpose of enforcing an enlargement of the member- ship of the house, although that body is already s0 crowded as to make it un- wieldly as a legislative assemblage. It is being seriously proposed to increase its members from 391 to #0. This would save the states with meager population from having their representation cut down. The present basis of representation is one mem- ber from every 194,00 of population. The leaders want to increase the ratio to one for each 220,000 of population, so as to keep the total membership of the house down to the present number. Congressman Mann of Chicago holds the record of objectlons and points of order in congress. Ho puts a microscope on all the bills that come out of committee. It he sees anything that doesn't look right, he gels out his point-of-order machine and starts it whirring. Many times he's whipped; many more the chalr sustains him. He was whipped when he tried to defeat that section of the judiclary bill which provided a judge for southern Ohfo. He made the assertion that the attorney gen- eral had never recommended a fudge for the southern district. “Yes, he has,” said Taylor, of Ohio Where s his recommendation?’ Mann shouted. “In the report,” sald Taylor. Mann fairly gloated. His voice rang out triumphantly: “It {sn't In the report,” he yelled, bend- ing double in his excitement. “I have read the report; the gentleman hasn't read it.” It wasn't in the report. That's why Mann is there with an argu- ment to back up his points. He knows what's In the reports, which is & heap more than a lot of congressmen know. But don’t get the notion, observes the Cleveland Leader correspondent, that Mann is only an objector. He's a legislator as well. To him goes the credit for the white slave bill; for the passage of the pure food act. Mann has whiskers. That's rather an abrupt departure from the foregoing; but there's no special way to bridge & remark about pure food to one about whiskers, so that we just jumped over. Mann has a mustache, too. He's slightly bald on top. What hair he has raggly. He wears glasses. He's very earnest and somewhat excitable, sspecially when somebody ques- tions his points of order. goes 8o far wrong in the temper of the house that he is the only vote in the nega- tive on some proposition upon which he has raised the point of order. But he ap- parently doesn‘t care, He'd rather be right than stlent. Several foreign ambassadors in Washing- ton are packing up their trunks preliminary to returning to their respective home capitals. They have been summoned back to Europe to take charge of the arrange- ments for the reception of Theodore Roose- velt. - The latter! 1s to be giveh ' the most wonderful welcome by the monarchs' of Burope accorded to any notable for many years. The kings, queens, presidents and other soverigns of Europe will outdo them- selves in showering honors and attentions upon Colonel Roosevelt. ‘The latter will be the guest at banquets, at balls, at re- ceptions and levees of every description. He will be the personal guest of the Kkhedive of Egypt, king of Greece, king of Italy, the emperor of Austria, the German emperor, the president of France, the king of England and a long line of potentates of lesser importance. Victor Murdock, the Kansas insurgent, has dug up more Inconsistencies in the pos- tal service than any member of congress. It was Murdock who discovered & fraud prac- ticed for years by which the rallroads were paid on a false basls through the simple device of striking a dally average of mails hauled by dividing the total for the week by six instead of seven. Now Murdock has unearthed the follow- ing interesting situation. He said: “On ocean mall route No. 76 & ship run- ning from San Francisco to the fsland of Tahiti, in the Southern Pacific, carried 42,000 pounds of mail annuslly, under the ocean mafl act, which many now desire to broaden and extend under leglslation generally known as ship subsidy. This vessel ‘of which I speak 18 of the third class and receives for carrying the mail $1 per mile, or M31%0 a year for carry- ing 42,000 pounds of mall, or $1 a pound. “But the payment is not by the pound. It is by the -mile. And this curlous thing happens. The captain of the ship sets out upon the sea from San Francisco, and steaming the direct route for Tahiti lands there, having completed a journey of 3,658 miles. But the mail which was loaded into the hold at San Francisco and is now dumped on to the doets at Tahitl has trav- eled 4,218 miles. The cargo which went on at San Francisco and which now goes off at Tahit! has been carried 3,658 miles. The matl has been carried 4218 miles, The line 0f the log spins merrily in the blue waters of the tropical sea, and at Tahiti registers & sum total of 4668 miles, but the United States mail has registered on the books of the department & trip of 4218 miles. “The tract chart of the Navy depart- ment shows that San Franclsco and Tahiti are 368 miles apart; the charts of our postal system show that San Francisco and Tahit! are 4218 miles apart. And we pay §1 per mile, not on the navy's charts, but on the postal charts.” Olile M. James of Kentucky comes from that portion of the Bluegrass reglon where comfort precedes dignity. Representative Edwin Denby comes from Deiroit, Mich., where soclety is careful of its every act. In addition, Mr. Denby had his early tralning in diplomatic circles, and for ten years his futher was United States minister to China. Hence, Denby was brought up on dignity. It happens that Denby and James are the two heavy- welghts of the Ballinger investigating com- mittee. It i not safe for both of them to ride in the same elevator. For two days, relates the Washington Times, James truggled to get his great bulk within the confines of a mahogany ctair, which had been constructed for an ordinary man. He suffered more than a woman with & pair of pretty shoes thres sizes too small. Finally, he insisted that Chalrman Nelson come to his relief. Krute Nelson has a keen sense of humor. Any one can tell that by looking at his sparkiing eyes. When the committee filed into the hearing room the same uncom- fortable chalr was at James' place at the table. Ollle looked reproachfully at the chairman. A moment later two husky por- and was &n engineer for fifteen years, L ters struggied into -the room, in full view to him Cannon gives the credit |, Sometimes he | dow: Dr.PRICE'S CREAM BAKING POWDER of the spectators, with the biggest loung- ing chair to be found in the building and substituted 1t for the little mahogany affair. “I don't see why thls chalr couldn't have been put here early this morning," sald James. , Senator Nelson just smiled. “Say, Denby,” sald James, “you can't make any one belleve you are smaller than Iam just by sitting in that doll 1 don't belleve I am any smaller,” re- plied Denby, “but I hate to admit, even to myself, that the day has arrived when I must haye speclal furniture to accom- modate me." CHEERY CHAFF, ““When I left the scene of the crime the policeman was hot after a clue.” per’ to be associated with a scent?’'—Balti- more American. “Ugh!” sputtered Mr. Jones. had a worm in it “Here,” urged a friend, offering him a glass of water, “drink this and wash it “Vhy him walk!"—Everybody's “That nut "Wash_it downt growled Jones. should 1?7 Let Magazine. Editor (to reporter)~What do you mean by writing, ‘Among_the prettiest girls at a dance was Capt. Smith? The captain is a man. Reporter—Yes, but he spent most of his time among the prettiest girls there.— Louisville Herala. "‘H%hby, did you bring home my new ji\r:’d my puffs?” ‘How about my ‘face “Here's your complex and_ assemble yourself. fer-Journal. waer?" m. Now get busy Loulsville Cour- “I think T have made a speech that will echo down the corridors of time,” sald the_self-confident statesman. ““Yes,” replled his colleague; “it will at- tract the same sort of attention in the corridors of time that a man singing off the key at 2 &. m. attracts in an apart- ment house,”’—Washington Star. “Your wife's new gown is a poem, Mr. Beasley,” sald Miss Gughington. “T afdn't know,” said Mr. Beasley gloom- fly, “that there was any form of poetry “It Is_quite natural, len't it, for a ‘cop-|' that buttoned down the back."—Cleveland Plan Dealer. Barber—Have anything face when I get througH, Victim—Some skin'and a nose, I hope.— Boston Transeript. She—I like the way the men talk Shakespeare and the books of that time e—What do you like particularly about thelr talk? She—They had such a saying, “Ay, marry wil American. The Mohammedan bandit looked up and beheld a caravan approaching. “Ha!” he cried, “the gen here “How do you know?" inquired his trusted Ueutenant, seo the first robb’!" Thien he chuckled’ within his beard, mur- muring, “"And yet they say I have not a gentle, fun-loving disposition! WHAT IFt What if the wind should forget to blow, The pussy-willows to.bud What If the ground should forget to thaw. What would we do for on your loasing way of 11" —Baltimore A mud? What if the robins should fall to return? What if the sun wouldn't rise? What it the colors should run and the blue Should all fade out of the skles? ‘What if the fce should (nrgsl to melt? The brook to babble alon Whn Il’ l:he lark should And cloln forget his song? What If the trees should hoard their sap, As misers ho their gold, Refusing to circulate into leaves? Wouldn't this world seem cold? What If the hens should refuse to set? Or the eggs refuse to hatoh? Or what If father'd forget to spade #The ground for hialgerdenimasoh u What if that comet we're all waitin' for Should appear without its tall? What if the women'd forget to_go Down town to the bargain sale? %ecoma stage- What if the people would all combine To clean these dirty streets, And bury the junk and burn the trash? Or the prices drop on meats? What if a whole long week shnuld pass ‘Without the news of a_wrec! And what If the writer of this hele pom¢ Should receive a nice litle cheque? —BAYOLL NE TRELE. 'VERY pound of OLD GOLDEN COFFEE is chosen from “Old Crop Stocks,” sufficiently aged to develop the rich mellow flavor and fragrant aroma, The Boudeir Here book—e P! of dllurlm‘nnlnL modgel n-m 1anor iaan & good lho fact uuu its nu personally. plano, & ’“n m al L lal ou let us ex h) chust et oyt 8 expisds this IT8 BXOLUSIV. “ 0! mtunm 36—a reason that we.wlm l ) ltflcu' m.nmuu. 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