Omaha Daily Bee Newspaper, December 19, 1909, Page 39

THE OMAHA SUN By Geneve Cole, Aged 11 Years. Neb. Red Side. The snow was falling silently Om_the black tops towering high; On the tops that stood loftily Heaching so near the cold gray sky. Netgn, t covered the walks and porches, It carpeted fleld and lawn; Covers the bird who hops and searches His food in the early dawn The children get happy and merry And want to be off and away And their cheeks get red as a cherry, As they glide along in the sleigh The house wives are glad for cool weather, ‘And_hurry to finish their work, But they all have more to do, Whether They do it all quickly or shirk The ice gets frozen and covered, And the snow gets packed and stiff But from it the sieds are severed, And then to the hill goes each skiff. The children play on until the night fall, And then to their homes they all run AS they hear the sound of their mother's call, Whon the hilltop covers tha sun Owning Up By Annie Wardian, Aged 11 Years 1022 North _Twenty-seventh Street, South South Omaha. Red Side. Jenny Smith was a duffer at arithmetic, there was no denying that. But today a ondertul thing had happened—she'd man- aged to get all the answers right to her four really hard sum “Bravo, Jenny!" said her teacher. “You're getting on.” But somehow Jenny didn't look very pleased, though she had always wanted so much to be clever at doing sums. And you would have thought she'd have been more pleased than ever at getting them ght today, because she was the only one who had done so. At least she was until brought her book up. “Why, Mary, you've got all your sums right, too, today!’ said the teacher In as- tonishment, for she knew thet Mary wasn't any better than Jenny at arithmetic as a ruls Now Jenny and Mary had sat next to each other, and when their teacher noticed this she called them both to her. “Im very much afraid.” she said, “that one'of you two has been copying.” Poor Mary hung her head and blushed and when her teacher saw this she said: “Was it you, Mary?" And the little girl sobbed and eried, and was too frightened to deny it so the teacher sent Jenny back to her seat and took Mary to the head mistress. And when all the classes were together before golng home there stood poor Mary in disgrace. She was close beside the head mistress, and everyone whispered and nodded as they talked to each other about what she had done. When she appeared outside the school later on they pointed at her and called her “Cheat!” But no one noticed Jenny Smith, who stood by her- self In & corner, looking and feeling as miserable as & girl could And no wonder, for she had been the cheat, and hadn't the courage to confess, 80 Mary had suffered because she was such a nervous little girl. But Jenny made up her mind to tell the truth to her teacher that afternoon and she did. Of course, she felt dreadfully ashamed of herself, but the head mistress sald it was only fair to Mary to explain things before the whole school. Though Jenny passed through a terrible ten minutes while the explanation was golng on, she felt quite lighthearted and happy when it was over, becauss she knew she had done what was right. And she never forgot how much harder it i to own up” when we've tried first of all to escape telling the truth. The Dog Santa Claus. By Emma Bressman, 1431 Omaha, Neb. Red A long time ago there a poor family. They had two and a dog. The children had to go around and gather things to eat and wear by beg- Mary Faulkner Emmett Street, Side, ging streets. One day the children were out on their journey they passed a store where there was lots of pretty toys. “Oh, what a pretty doll” raid the little girl. “Ges, but 1 wish I had that drum,” sald the boy. That night when they got home their mother gave them some bread and milk to eat and put to bed crying. They had asked if could hang up their stocking and those pretty toys, but the mother “no,” we are too poor to buy any- thing for you children to play with. We hardly enough to buy things to eat. The dog understood why the ¢ dren were crying and he said to himself, I will try to help them out, 0 after the chilren were asicep out the dog trotted He went over to the shop and looked around a while. Then out in front he spied the things the children wanted, when no one was loking he picked up the doll In his mouth and carried it home. Then he went back again and got the drum. When he got back home he puiled down the stocking that he saw the girl put up snd iLiied (o stick the Joll in. Ile got it hdlf way In when he fell asleep. He was 80 tired the next morning when the children gbt up they ran to their stock- ings to see what Santa Claus had brought them. Soon the boy saw in his drum the dog’s teethmarks. Then they knew that it must have been the dog that got them. After that they always called their dog Santa Claus. on the when have money so Why The Indians Went Away. 13 years. Blue Side. Once upon a time a family lived out west. They lived near some Indians and the Indians did not like the white people, 80 One day they crept up to the house of the white people and they saw the little baby sitting oulside the door. They crept up to where the baby was sitting aud they took her and ran awav to camp, where they kept her for three days. Then they sent & note 1o the child's parents. They said: “We know where your baby is and if you will pay $W to us we will bring your baby to you. When the father and mother read this he sent & note back saying they would pay what they wanted. The Indians took the baby back and got the money, but as soon as they got back to the camp were afrald they wouid get caught, s0 they went away 1o another part of the country. ‘When John got Lost. By Dorothy Taylor, Abbott, Neb., ¥ years. biue sige Long ago before you and I were born some people lived in Wyoming. They had & little girl and boy. The boy was named John, aged four, and the girl named Mary, aged 7. One day the little boy strayed far from his home. His father sent nine men to hunt for the lost boy. When John was found and brougnt back home his mother took better care of him. Learn to Obey Bruce Taylor, Agéd 10 Years eb. Blue Side. Once upon a time, John asked his mother if he could go swimming. His mother said that the water was 100 cold and he might get cramps. He did not obey his mother, for there were a lot of other boys goini and when they got there one boy measured the water. It was deep, and after they had been swimming a while one of the boys calied, “help! help!” It was John. He had cramps, and one of the boys threw him & line. After a while they got him out. After that he alwi obeyed his mother. their Aged By Abbot, Altar Flowers. By Cecelia Shea, Aged 11 Years 385 U Street, South Omaha. Red Side. Once upon & time there was a little girl who loved God very much. Ske had a smaill Altar in her room, clese to her bed. On Xmas morning before going to church she would make it look pretty to show her love for the dear child J that day She put on a clean white linen cloth tMmmed with lace, some wax candles in brass candlesticks and a statue of blessed lady Just at her feet she pl a straw basket wherein lay the blessed babe, and then she sald, “I have not a single flower to give Thee on Thy birthday Bhe stepped out into the smow and ran into the gerden. She knelt down an prayed and when she finished & bright light shone bafore her. It was God Himself and He said, “Child, If thou will but keep My commandments I would rather have it than all the flowers in the world. us, who was born on Lost on the Prairie Francis Shea, Aged 12 Years 35 Street, South Omaha. Red Side. A few years ago a party of workmen had just finished their day's work In due of the western states, when & violent snow- storm came om. They set out for their camp, which was in & large grove in an extensive prairie nearly twenty miles dis- tant from any other timberiand. The wind blaw, very hard and the snow was falling so fast that they could hardly see each other. When they thought that they had nearly reached their camp they suddenly noticed marks of footsteps In the snow. On examining these with care they found to their dismay that they were their own tracks. It was mow plain that they were lost on the great prairie. It they had (o pass the night there in the cold, drifting snow, the chances were that . would ail perish before morning. While the whole party stood shivering with cold, at & loss what to do, one of the party caught sight of a particular horse they had with them which was known as old Jack. it any he cried, “can show our way out of this blinding snow old Jack can” And aia, showed them the way to their camp. By w they one,"” A Hard Test By Anna Popp, Aged 14 Years, 1034 North Twenty Seventn Street, South Omaha, Neb. Red Side. The boy was 12 years oid. All he knew of life was that there were nine months of school, with a lot of play, and three months of play, and no school. This vacation was to be a little different, but the boy didn't know it ome on, S 1 need your help, ald the father one evening after his own day's work was done. “1 want this dirt carried up to our flat.” The boy opened his father wanted him to carry baskets of dirt up three flights of steps. There was a queer feeling of resentment all about In- side of him “I can't carry dirt,” he said Never too late to leamn,’ good-naturedly. “Here, you lighter basket. Up the stairs went the boy. The air was close and he got hot and breathless. Down he came again. The dirt had to be dug and shoveled into the basket. He grew hotter and the perspiration began to trickle down his back. “The boys are playing ball. over,” he said at last, can’t shovel dir “All right, my bc).” sald father; “but I'm disappointed in you. I had expected to find you able to stick to a thing. I counted on your help, too; but it's all right; go head and play ball’ The boy washed his hands and went over into the next yard. It was the first time he ever remembered feeling uncomfortable when playing ball. Tonight it wasn't much fun. Pretty soon he left the boys and went upstairs to his mother. By and by Le came down, rolled up his sleeves and went at the shoveling. His father had planned for the fire escape corner. of airt The boy sweated and puffed. ered his hands; but he stuck At last the work was done. Father and son washed themselves and got ready for supper. After supper, when the fathér had streched ‘himself out for a pleasant hour with his newspaper, the boy came to him. “I guess, father,” he said with an air half- ashamed, and yet of new manliness, T guess it was a good thing for me to do something that I didn't want to do.” Father held out his hand. The boy grasped it with a strong grip. “I'm mighty glad I stuck, father the boy. “Good for you," A Good Thanksgiving Joke By Frances V. O. Johnson, Queen, Aged 14 Years, §88 North Twenty-fifth Avenue, Omaha, Neb. Biue Side. It was Thanksgiving morning. In the Kitchen was to be heard the ratting of pans and dishes, for it most certainly was mouth wide. His said father, take the I'm going with impatience. “I a little garden It took a lot He blist- said sald father. l) AY BEE DECEMBER 19, 1909. THEIROWHL When May Went Hunting Indian Graves AY'S fathor had the little Kansas town on busi- ness, but it was in the early fail that he had rented a com fortable house situated in the v i, B W B 1 P moved his family into it, for he %00d wife had decided that their son’‘and daughter, and May, have the advantages of the graded In the sparsely settled district they lived the schoolhouse was from their home that during the months little Joey and May to remain at home when sever All about the town broad prairies stretched away, the line of vision being 106t in blue haze. And little May, 7 years old, would look with longing eyes toward the west, where a low range of hills held much of mystery for her. She had heard her father tell of the many Indian bands that had roved over those prairies long ago and had camped on the bamks of the wild little creek that found its way among the hills. And also May had heard of the terible Indfan and white-men battles that had been so desperately fought among those hills and of ther many graves which held the remains snd belongings of the red-skinned savages. And she had heard of how men had dug Into some of those Indian graves and found treasure in the form of feather head-dresses, beads and spear heads. Ah, {o possess some of those heautiful strings of brilllantly colored beads! And to own & feather head- dress which had doubtless been worn by some little girl papoose would give her such joy. Of course, her father had ex- plained that the stirring events of which he told had happened a very long time ago; but to May a “long time ago” meant a few months or years—perhaps only last winter, for she was too young to realize the full significance of time. S0 as the fall days waned May dreamed and dreamed of the interesting relies of a past race that were possibly to be got for the trouble of digging emong the dis- tant blue hills. But there was the sc so much of Joey day, often gone to in Joey school where so far winter obliged r was were o wea ool, little May’s which clalmed time. She and bad been enrolled on the opening and neither of them had been ab- sent or tardy, and May was her teach- er's favorite, if it could be said that teacher dared let herself have a favorite. Often after school May would accompany teacher as far as her gate, for their way lay in the same direction, and while walking together May would ask count- less questions of teacher about the Indlan wars and the customs of the fierce, dusky peaple who had once reigned over that part of the world, Ons morning after May had been dressed for school she asked of her brother Joey, who was putting his books into his school- bag: Joey, school 7" “Yep, onct,” said Joey. “And did God forgive you for doing it?” queried May. did you ever run away from By Fiorence Davis. JOEY, DID YOU BVER Mother sald God would forgive me it I got on my knees and confessed my wrongdoing. And I did it, too. So I guess God -forgave me; but father didm't. He sent me to bed without any supper, and when Christmas came 1 didn't get the knife I wanted. Oh, it doesn't pay to be naughty or disobedient” And Joey strapped up the mouth of the schoolbag. Then slapping on his hat and overcoat, he started toward the door. “Say, Sis, I won't walt for you,” he sald, “I want to play a litde wiih Tom aud bafor: the last bell rings.” Then bethinking him- self, he turned toward the door leading into the kitchen and called out: “Say, Maggie, don’t let May be late to school. You know mother went uptown with father this morning to do some marketing and left May in my care. I'll leave her in yours.” Then away flew Joey in the direction of the school house. “All right, Master Joey,” answered Maggie, the maid-of-all-work. Then she got May's jacket and hat and packed up her books for her. “Noy, little dearie, you are ready for school.” And the good servant patted little May's nead and re- turned to her work in the kitchen. May went out of the house, drawing on her red woolen mittens as she walked. Her bookbag was over her shoulder. “If God forgave Joey for running away, as she passed out at the gate, forgive me, t00. And as for a knife at istmas—well, 1 don't want one.”” Then instead of going up the long street that led to the school house, May turned In an opposite direction and ran along beside the high hedge, which prevented Maggie from seeing her should that good soul look from the window. After getting well out of sight of the house, May sat down on the roadside. Her eves turned In the direction of the hills, among which lay the sunken Indian graves, kecpiug their own secrets and RUN N\ AWAY FROM SCHOOL treasures. Why should not she go thers and dig into one of the graves and take from it some of the beautiful beads and feathers? Yes, she would go to the hills. She ought to get there In a short time, for they seemed so very near Once her mind was made up May ran along the road as fast as she could, going towards the hills. She was soon so tired running, however, that she was obliged to pause to rest a bit; but she continucd her journey after a few nds. After & iong, hard Ume she reached a low h which belonged to the greater range far- ther on. Here she decided to begin search for an Indian grave. After looking about she found a knmoll-lke spot over which matted some long dead moss. Deftly May's little hands tore away the grass, but the ground was so hard that she coud not get into it with her fingers lay about, drifted into the low places, and the wind was rather sharp, coming from the north. But May knew that she would get warm working and set about hunting some sort of implement with which to dig. Luck- fly she found a doubtless been an old campfire years ago. With the stick May began to dig furiously. But after working till her hands and arms and back ached she had made scarcely any impression on the half frozen ground, and began to feel discour- aged. Then fear seized her. She looked about, expecting to see the town in the dis- tance, but in following the road hither she had made many turns and no habitations of any kind could she see. She dropped the stick and ran farther up the hill, stop- ping to look about her. Not a house was to be seen on the prairies. She must have gotten lost. As this thought came to her she sat on the ground and began to cry. Oh, what had she done? Then she sud- denly remembered that one should always pray in distress. With uplifted. tear-stained face the poor little girl prayed that she on Some snow might delivered out of the wilderness apd out of the house of bondage.'' Sha repeatsd the strange words which came to for she had heard them In the church the Sunday school, and thought they sounded very grand. But at the end of hes prayer she cried out from her heart: “Oh, Lord, lead poor little May back to mather Then fresh tears flowed, hut her heart felt lighter and, rising. she turned down the hillside. As she did so & durk object appeared on the road quite & long way off As it drew nearer May beheld it to be a farmer's horses and wagon. In the wagon sat & man, who, on potieing the little child beside the road, reined in his Waal, how-dy-do, little one,” he grinned. “Where you come from, and be you dol hers two trom t be her or standing horses. what out miles ywn? May told every word of her. story, and ve her father's name Ah, 1 know your pap well” declared good farmer. “Come, jump into the wagon and L'l tote you home I pass by your house goln’ into town. But, child, don't know there's not & sign of an Injun grave in these parts any more? Been gone years, 1 reckon. Why, it's been s0 long ago that the red fellows was burled there that if you found a grave there'd be nothin' in it but dust. But never mind, lots of grownup folks huat for things harder to find and, of course, never gt ‘em.” Thus the farmer consoled May as she sat beside him in the wagon, & hors blanket wrapped snugly about her. And after a little while the wagon stopped at her own e, and there she saw her mwother coming out, her eyes frightened When she beheld her little daughter she threw up her hands, exclaiming, “Thank God, my child is hére.” Then as May ran into her arms and the farmer drove on, the ashamed little girl confessed that she had run away from school and told the whole story from the minute she own home till she returned to it. “Oh, dearie,” sald the mother, leading May into the house, “I just got home a few minutes ago, and Maggle and Joey had come in for Juncheon and asked why you had not been at school tnis morning: thought you might have taken toothache after he left. I ran to question him my self. He eald you had not been at school— that he had not seen you since he left the house this morning. I was just rushing out to give the alarm that you were stolen or lost, when up you came n the farmer's wagon. Oh, child, how Joey, Maggle and I were frightened!” And the mother dropped into & chair and wiped tears from her eyes. *“Sis ought to have a whipping,” declared Joey, who had come in in time to overhear May's story. “Naughty girls and boys need to be punished. “Sister’s been punished enough,” said Motlier in & low voice. “And she has re- pented of her wrongdoing. And she has seen how=she made brother and mother and Maggie worry, too, winch adds to her punishment. And I know God will forgive her—if she never does so any more.” “I never, never will be naughty again,” sald May. Then, with tears streaming, she threw herself into her loving mother's arms, where she wept out her naughtiness. And pretty soon Maggie brought in a big slice of bread and butter and—think of it!— spread with jam. . the you forty a gala day in the Morris family. grandparents, aunts and uncles who were to partake of a tempting turkey-dinner, the minister's family was also to dine with them. For this reason, mother was busily engaged in preparing dainty salads and a huge, golden pumpkin ple, tilling and basting a turkey so enormous and majestic in size that Maybelle, Roland and Chester smacked their 1ips to satisty their watering mouths. Cook had placed the gobbler on the pantry window, preparatory to roasting, but she had been rendered =0 nervous and excited over an uninterrupted series of accidents that morning that had neglected giving Carlo, the pet dog, his breakfast. After the guests began to arrive Mrs Morris asked cook It the turkey had been put In the oven. Like a flash, Cook flew to the pantry, There it aid lay, half torn to pleces, and dissected a most barbarous fashion. Who was gullty? Just then you could have seen Carlo run- ning stealthily through the back gate, for well aware was he that his chosen break- fast had resulted rather seriously. Mrs. Morris, in her deepest dism fortunately very seif-composed, and coolly gent Roland over to the Barnes' family with & Thanksgiving basket, as was tended. He arrived at his destination in a very excited state, and after giving the basket, told immediately the sad ending of Besides when lo! in the proud fowl. Mrs. Barnes beamed up with joy and exclaimed, “Being you gave such a generous basket of f00d, please take this fine turkey which the association has sent us, as that fare is far too expensive for us: Roland's eyes were overbrimming with de- light, and he accepted the offer with much thanks. You may be sure that Mrs. Morris was more than grateful for the turkey, and, as we shall presently see, it proved an excellent substitute. At once the gobb- ler was put In the oven with glorious an- ticipations, and by the time the guests had arrived, the table fairly groaned with deli- cactes. To grandpa fell the task of carv- ing the turkey, who, aithough Inanimate, looked very kingly as he proudly lay there. The minister was'first to receive his share, and after all were provided for, then began the feast. But all of a sudden, some- velped, “Ob, Oh!" This “someone’ was no one more or less than the digni- fied minister, Who had, in eating & plece ¢ tae elegant turkey, bitten into some- hing so hard that his gold filling came out. Would you belleve that what he had bitten into was a % gold plece, which the charitable association had secretly placed ide the fowl to Epring & grand surprise on the poverty-stricken family. The dinner then proceeded with nothing very thrilling, save that Maybelle upset a cut-glass tumb- ler, much to her embarrassment The next day, after gladly returning the one balf-eagle, the Barnes were most gener- ously provided for with warm clothing, fuel and food, and I don't know which family was the happler,’ the upon which was lavishly showered a whole sea- son’s necessitles, or the one which nessed the grave, serious minister for surprise and dismay when away Thanksgiving dinner, do you? one wit- Jump at a The Butterfly Mabel Houston, Aged 9 Years, North Sixteen Street. Red Side There is one gay creature; do you know who he is? It is the butterfly. He flits among the flowers shine all day long. One day the queen of the butterflies was golng to have a party. She invited all the rest but him. The night of the party he n and said If you don’t give me #some dew and b ey I will kill you." Bo come visitor. By 018 in the came gave him some, but he was ar unwel- Poor Jack l"uJ Waller, 340 North Twenty-eig et, 1.mculn Red de, e was once a very poor boy Jack. He was a kind-hearted d. 80 poor, that, In faect, he had money matches. His father dled This was very By Ther He was haidly for when he unfortunate for a bat Juck and his mother who was a hardworking woman. he washed for her living Thanksgiving was coming and what could she do. She had no coal and it was very cold and the snow lay on the ground in great quantities. She had to have some- thing for Jack Oue’ night as he was ligl saw a bird laying on the ground stiff. Jack took it home and made a bed for it. At last it opened its eyes and began to flutter. Jack's mother let it go. The next day Mrs. Byron, Jack's mother, received a letter, It had $2 in it. Now she could buy coal. The next morning Jack got up and saw a cheerful fire burning. He had liver, pickles and bread for Thanks- g lamps, he The Birds Hardinbrook, Aged ‘Omaha. | Blue Side. e day as 1 was going to my grandma’'s aw a beautiful bird hopping on ground. \In a few minutes it picked p & crumb and flew up in a tree on the edge of a limb near a nest. Then I saw & little bird hopping on the edge of the nest As soon as its mother saw her little bird she hid the crumb. At last the little bira saw crumb and wanted it, 80 tha bird gave it to ner ment my grandma called me for dinner, so that was the last I saw of the little bird and its mothe DeEtte, 10 Years, the mother AL thar mo- Conviviality. T a dinner in Denver Judge Ben B. Lindsey told a story about Christmas conviviality. “There used to be an oM fel- low of 8, he said. “who got arvested about twice a week for conviviality, He was always haled be- fore Magistrate Blank, and as the mag- istrate was about 8, 100, & queer kind of comradeship, almost friendly, arose be- tween the two men “In the late autumn the toper was calied away from Denver. He did not return till Christmas time. The convivial Christmas spirit In the erisp Denver air was, of course, %00 mueh for bim, and the day after his return he was haled before the usua! magistrate on the usual charge. “The magistrate, in the green festooned court room, felt kindly and forgiving. * ‘Well, George.' he sald to the prisoner, ‘You are here again, at lastr “‘Yes, your hener, sald old George humbly. ““You've been away some Line, haves't your “ "Yes, your Bober, months." ‘And how many tmes, George, did you t drunk during the period ™ “ T don't like to say, your bonmor,’ oM George faltered, ‘before all these here peo- ple’ " Well” sald the magistrate, ‘take paper and pencil and write it dewn' “So George wrote, and the paper was passed up to the magistrate, who looked at and sald: A, well, It's the Christmas season; and oo you were away thres menths, George, ouly got drunk sixtesn times, I'll let you ott’ slgh on to three from the Story Teller's Pack he left the dock. ‘You looked at the paper upside down, though.' “—Denver News. o SEIR Averted Trouble for AlL The other day Magistrate Carey had a case before him which he decided in a novel manner, but one which was entirely satisfactory in both sides of the contro- versy. Two forelgners had become In- volved in & dispute. Each had the other arrested and wished that each other be held in bonds to keep the peace. When the case came before Magistrate Carey each side had a large number ot witnesses and few of them could talk even understandable English. The hearing of testimony had only begun when the magistrate asked prosscutor No. 1 how many witnesses he had. After a count he gave Tourteen as the number “How many witnesses have you got?” he asked prosecutor No. 1 This man counted and the answer fourteen. “It's & tie” pronounced the magistrate. And he told both men to go home and err no more.—Philadelphia Press. i Underestimating His Ability. H. W. Kilaussman, chairman of the re- publican city committee, tells & story about » bass drummer of & band that he swears 1S true. The drumier was & Gesman. He, with the other memburs of the band, was on an excursion train, and the tickets they had were about four feet long (that is, four feet of ticket per man, 180 feet for the whole forty-piece band). Soon after Hans was seated comfortably the cobductor came by for the tickets. Hans reached for his. Horrors. It was gone He grew ex- cited #nd searched mnd spluttered, but all in vein He declaved bhe had lost the ticket. “Why," ventursd the conducter, “yeu couldn’t have lost that ticket feet long. Vass 1887 Vy you dalk like dose®” de- manded Hans excitedly, “Vy, once I lose dat tdrum. I could loose & teeket If I looso heem! —Indianapolls Star. It was four b Kept His Weord.. At the banquet to the humorist vrgan zation given by the Buffalo Chamber of Commerce a Chicago visitor told how a resident of his own town had lost & watch in the streets of Buffalo and then hur- ried to the nearest police station to report the calamity. The sergeant listened to his respectful interest. ‘You may rest assured, sir,” he sald to the Chicagd man, “that we will leave no stone unturned in our efforts to recover your property.” Two years later the Chicage man was in Buffalo again. He looked around at the Buffalo street and then hurried to the police sergeant. “Why, sergeant” he cried, “I see you kept your word, but I didn't expect you'd tear up all of ‘em!"—Philadeiphia Record. —— Her Experience Was A The attractive young lady who ad writ- ten “urgent” on her card was shown into the comsulting reom of Sir Choppham Fyne, hesd of the famous surgichl hospital in Splintshire. “And what is the matter with you? said the great man “I wish,” she amswered, ‘to become & nurse in this institution. The surgeon tapped a thougntful tooth with his lance. “First, cne question: Have you had any previous experience®™ She dazed him with & reassuring smile. “Experience? she cried. “I should just iak 86 Twe of my beothers play feot tory with another has tried to cross the chan- aeroplane of his own make, a suffragette and father keeps ~London Tid-Bits. iy iy Habitat of the Bull. T. P. O'Connor, the witty Ir mentarian, discussed at a dinner York the bull The bull,” said he Ireland. It was an Englishman. n Er e—who, being tramp that 1 unmar that's a good thing r And it was & French soldier who, in his tent ne Jar pillow, replied on belng asked it wasn't hard I've stuff:d see, with ba And it was an Awer New York who cried th the taliboard of a dray nt the people will not rending eries nel an mother is er 4 motor car sh parlia- New fined to ou know told by a replied wite sicep- tor the jar ‘Oh, ne an politician | other night from 1f we remain hear our heart- —New York Star Fized to Stay. One of the friends of Representative Martin of South Dakota was making a strenuous compialnt to Mr, Mart ut the manner in which committee ments were given in the ‘A new senator, however, be has Do chance,” sald Mr. Martin's friend, “but if he's & thousand years be can get the best committee job “That reminds me,” said the South Da- kota member, “of what Scth Bullock marked to me when 1 took him the senate one time After looking them over Seth sald: ‘Gee, Martin! That looks like & soldiers’ home in there.’ "~ Rochester Herald. &b assig senate able he may re- over to The Badgering Lawy “The badgering lawyer frequently suc ceeds only In affording the witness an op- portunity to display his own wit at the counsel's expense,” said Fred S Wise, a lwyer of Philadeiphia “An sctor was before the poor debtors’ eowrt i & western city, when he lestified that his only me assets were his salary aber of the local stock company But you must have somathing else,’ said the prosecuting “Fell as a counsel. you bave the iat e That's all.’ /hat? No personal property Ob, yes; & dog and a watch. Now, think hard,' persisted t sel, believing that he was on track. ‘What v ‘Well,' suggested the actor, ‘I ot rheumatism e coun- the right else have & Herald —Washingtos Ax Corrected By cretary Robert D. Argus of the board ed this stors A teacher in the primary wark school Willte. wcation tells grade of a was instrucing her class in »f sentences. After a talk ral minutes she wrote two sentences blackboard, one grammatically the other & misstatement of facts. The sentences were ‘The hen has three legs. Who done it ‘Willie,” she sald, ‘g0 to the blackboard and show where the fault lies in these two sentences wil wrote it composition of sev on wrong. e did s0. To her astonishment The hen never done it; God done ~Newark Star he Agreed With the Court. A lawyer into cour the judge sald to him Sir, 1 am sorry tion which famlly, and belong.” This reproof elicited squy came drunk, when to see you in & situa a Qisgrace to yourself and the profession to which the following Did your bonor spesk to me? “1 did air, T sald, sir, that, in my opinion, disgraced yourself and family, the and the profession by your course of conduct Maybe i—i—it please your honor, 1 have been an attorney in—in-—in this e-eourt for fifieen yoars, and, permit me to say, you court your that opinion 1 ever knew Advertiser. honor, this i i Epsy When You Know How. .\h;fira\w Hughes of Philad, Is known far and wide for §ood, sound ju that come before him daily, was sitting in Ris office at 546 Tasker streei a few days ago when a young He was excited and out na was without a hat Judge.” he eja of trouble and I of it If you can Well, let's hear what it is wagistrate. Said ti troub Living in my me is my brother bables and that I'm afraid I think my Each baby eves and one alike, too. “Are you sure they the magistrate Am I sure of it was the quick reply “Well, then,” suggested the g f that is the case, why exchange them.” That's just anxious father Everything must lovely young man has been seen sine Mr. Hughes—Philadeiphia Telegraph wit who and ng of cases man rushed in of breati ated, “I am in a peck o help me ou eplied the house with my wit. We & s0 much them n and and his wite have they have we xed er has mine and 1 black hair a They are broth his. tooth are twist Why, 1 il home not go and what and be rn be do, 4id the departed. for the by hastily now, ey His Mateh, Running from Spokane to | Newport Wash,, (s the Idaho & Washington North- raliroad. bullt by its president, A. ¥ Blackwell, who made his money in tim- ber lands and bullds rallrosds to show Bow well it can be done He bulit the first interurban electric out of Spqkane. relates the Saturday Even- ing Post. After selling It to the Hil in- terests, he bullt the roads which he now owns, and which was the only raliroad tn Hil Met ern Washington for . which the State Rallroad and Warehouse commission could find ne svements to suggest. Lmp: Blackw now bullding au extension ot road from Newport to the Metaline mining district, a particular'y inaccessible reglon, which It gets transporta tlon, al the Coeur d'Alene @lstrict in_the production of lead and silver. When James J. Hill visited Spokane last summer he met Blackwell. “I understand you intend building a road down the Pen QOrvile river s greeting. “1 do," was the qu of the timber king. But 1 bulld a branch of the Great down there.” . “Then thei roads,” was the equally quiet Blackwell s the one 15 being bulit when was t respons. plan to hen e The that will & rejudice. Fall River, speaking toid & story about au nist said to the theater saw ‘Othe Withou Coughlin of at a recent ban old Fall River The old went in Boston one night and His knowledge of the Bard of Avon was limited; he had no idea that the hero of the plece was & white man blackened up. Well, after the play was over, & friend asked him what he thought of the mctors, He cleared his throat and answered de- berately ‘Wall, layin' all sectional prejudices aside, and puttin’ out of the question any partiality I may have for the race as sech— durned if I don't think the nigger held his own with any on ‘em.’ "—Hoston Herald. Mayor Coughiir v 't Spare Amy. What's the baby crying about?" the fashional mother. For & cake ma'am, &irl “Well, give her a cake, for gracious’ Sake and stop her nolse! “But the: an't any cake In the house, ma'am. Will T give her Mue of Whiskers' dog cakes?' “Goodnes: no! There are only them left for dear Yoakers Stalesmen. Couldn't asked replied the nurse five of ittle Whiskers!