Omaha Daily Bee Newspaper, May 26, 1883, Page 2

SEEK health and avoid sickness. Instead of feeling tired and worn out, instead of aches and pains, wouldn't you rather feel fresh and strong ? POEIRY OF THE TIMHS, The Star Route Trial. 1 make the court and jary d While time so slowly p T wit astride the judge's And roost upon his gl Buch flaods of talk hs Such endless That strange And wonder wha come from me, of ohatter, all they see, hie matte Both sides are rich, the people say, The lawyers trained and clever, And counsel's pay is by the day, Weile I go on forever, I've seen the winter molt in spring, But still my deys are dreary; At nature’s grand awakening My littls world way woary. A leaden cloud of talk am T, The wunlight daily quenching, And every lucklem passer-by Ts sure to get a drenching. T've talked the jndge's eyoballs dim, And petrified his liver; No joy can life afford to him, While I go on forever, You can continue fecling miserable and good for no- thing, and no one but your- self can find fault, but if you are tired of that kind of life, you can change it if you choose. The jury, rooted to the spot, Are nothing now bat dunimies, And sit o Iifolesn as lot « Of old K ¢yptisn mummies, Tley daily lose their ho'd on ‘Lheir sense of time and season, And nothing stirs their eouls to mirth, Or moves their micds to reason, How? By getting one bottle of Brown' IroN Bir- TERS,and taking it regularly ‘ according to directions, Mansfield, Ohlo, Nov. a6, 1681, Gentlemen :—1 have suffered with pain in my side and back, and great goreness on my breast, vith shot- So helplessly they float away, Like leavea upon a river, T T s Aud counsel’s pay is by the day, tended with great weakness, depres- ) Sion of spirits, and loss of Appes ‘While I go on forever, tite, 1 have taken several different s On the Uaifornia Hills. Across the broad brown peacefal Hillr, With blossoms to our bronchon’ knees, With singing birds by broken rills, We rode through seas «f drowsy bees. ‘medicines, and was treated by prom- nent phydicians for my liver, kid- spleen, but Lgot no relief. I 'wou” try Brown’s Iron Bitters ; I have now taken one baitle and a half and am about well—fain in side and back all gone—soreness all out of my breast, and I have a good appetite, and am gaining in strengthand fiesh, It can justly be the king of medicines: Joun K, AvLunpir, The ardor of my speech grew atill As we rode on that perfeot day, The brown birds piping from the hill; The crickets had it their own way, Then we fell weary with the day, God's bars of gold across the west Before us drew and made us stay Beside a bloesomed rill and rest, Brown's IRON BITTERS is composed of Iron in soluble form; Cinchona the great tonic, together with other standard remedies, making a remarkable non-alcoholic tonic, which will cure Dys- pepsia, Indigestion, Malaria, Weakness, and relieve all Lung and Kidney diseases. The camp fire blazed, the bronchos gazed, And belly-deep in bloom and grass Would blink ss by the bright flame daeed, Or eniff to swmell the pantier pass, The massive stars of gold stood out, Bright camp fires of poor, weary souls, Bound heavenward, While all about, Ccuched peace, with white patrols, ~Joaquin Miller, — He Bet on the Filly. T =8 out to the races, dear Billy, Yes, out to tho half:amile tr 1 bet on a listle bay filly 4 That trotted and paced and then racked. ¢ The horses all started off, Billy, | y ‘ [}e]lius Rewa,I'dBd, At a torriblogait, indeed, Aud what do you think? that filly OR, The %ozv of the Sewins Machine Was far, yes far in the lead. 1 shouted and tore sround, Billy, 5 ¢ o Bo:u\ufi 1 h‘:d l!nlludhl.o hel:l more I the filly, the little bay tilly, 'R A {handsome little pymphlot, blue and gold 4 oovee Wikl asmorons Gagveriog, il be - © Ob, Billy, I was awfully sore, The horses dashed down to the home atretch With the tilly —my filly—ahe: When a black horse, the mean litile wratch, apped the filly, and made the heat dead. toany wdult poron ealling or It, at any branch or sub-office of the Singer Manufacturing Com. pany, of will bo seat by mall, post-pald, to any Person llviog at a d stance from our office, The Singer Manufacturing Co,, Priucipsl Office, ;84 Union Square NEW YORK. TiGosTuR) BITTERS. An excellent Tonic and Appe= tizer of exquisite 1 ] v E {1 - GIVEN AWAY But I was mistaken, dear Billy, They went rovnd the oircle” once more, And the filly, the little bay filly, Acted atiff and awfully rore, Well, I lost all my money, dear Billv; Can T borrow a **halt” or & *‘ons Aud I'll neyer bet more ou the filly, The filly which ran in that race, — Dennison, BEWARE OF COUNTERFEITS. Her Owo. Her arma were clapped about him, His head lay on ?m- breast, Sweet were the words she murmured As ahe his hair careased; She preased hor warmest kisson U pon hia beaming face, Anddeath alone could sever The love of her embrace, ] favor to a gl lemonade, sod all oy it “The ehuino Angostura s made by Dr. 3. G. I. 8he told him of her sorrows, And of her swesteat joys; The wedding duy she longed for, 0, love without alloys, And ia his enrs she whispered The fondest dialogue; ! GOLD MEDAL, PARIS, 3048 | . 0, 0 O rots told to— BAKER’S Her little poodle dog. GHOCOLATES ZTaker's Premism Chocolate, tho best ‘proparation of plain chocolate for fame ily “use. — Jiaker's liveakjust Cocoa, from which the excess of oil has been removed easlly digested and admirably sdapted for invalids. — Baker's Vanilla Ik or eaten as con= fectionery is a deliclous articlo | highly recommended by tourists. — Jaker's Ziroma, \nvaluable as 8 diet for chil- dren.— German Sweet Chocolate, 8 ‘most excellent article for families. Sold by Grocers everywhere. 3, W, WUPPERMAN, Solo Agent. 51 Broadway, N, Y. me-cod-& NavC HONHEY FOR THM LADIHS, Quill pens are used by all ultra fashion- ables, Rattlesnake skin hand bags are the latest, A Newport woman eats her rice with chopaticks, Short, full eyelashos are the only fash- lonable kind, In Brooklyn lives & girl who eats daily | { three pounds of candy. ¥ { R AR S OO0 || worn vras i soborly sanouzosd ae ’ { the lateet tint in that shade. Plain jerseys of red .or blue jare much worn with lawn-tennls costumes, { Sleevs of dresses and wraps are worn | lof the best candies 1 | ¢xceedingly high, and full on the shoulder 1. | [America, put up in| A Tucson girl b me to join the g | elegant boxes. and | Mexioan troops now fighting tho Indians. i 4 ety pare. HBuly Wreaths of natural cherry_blossoms are renn ChaTEe nurried over the right arm while out walk. 1 Kerors to sl Chijon: 108 wo. Try it once. A little bit of the arm must show be- Address, tween the glove and sleeve to be fashion. C. F. GUNTHER, | *b'e- There is o greater varlety in the styles of bathing suits than was ever before dis- played, A girl in O aoross the lake t Confectioner, us swam four times other day without rest- & ) ing once. &5 A young lady in Maryland has killed a | bear. 1If she is after bears, Chioago s the place for her, Cheeks without any color are now in style, Those who want them are girls with » goxd color. Volls of Spanish dotted net are worn twisted about the heat to concerts snd dinner parties, For summer toilets for good wearing use fanoy checked silks will be in greater de- wmand than ever, An economical Pbiladelphia woman wears all her husband'’s eocks out after he is through with thewm, The Chinese driving cloak with sabot sleoves hos taken the place this season of the Freuch redingote, The mest ixnocent of girle, says Floriro, knows that man ove with ber shortly before he knows it himself, A Washington boulevard girl who is an expert at haudkerchief flirtation thinks she ought to bo the chief of the signal ser- ; . g | vice. ‘ 7 A Michigan woman describes her ab- sconding bushand as of » **fried pork com- I'HE DAILY BEE-SATURDAY MAY %6 varied forms, and with endlees styles of drapery and garniture, A Texas girl hes gone into & convent f «ix months and given out word thet she ust to teat her lover and see if he will marry some one else, Knglish ladies who ride wear high Wel. lington bosts and wash lesther troussrs, London Queen prefers sott woelen twill made expremly for the purpose. A Tallahsasee belle recently attended & party wearing live spiders in her hair. It was dope in self.defense, hecanse the young men down there are to k! Fine cotton fabrics are likely to be high ¥h fashionable throughont the summes e popularity of printe 8, lawns, snd musling is to be very g Pale yellow and bright gold are the colors triumphant even in floral garniture, dy sacflower has wunk into obli- s replaced by primroses, oew. 3 golds, kingcupe, Narciesus, and hmallows Now York's ‘‘best moolety” now cut their own brexd at the table on a plate made of wood from the Holy Land,and with a knife purchased in Damsscus, 'One generation back it was not the “‘cutting” of the bread but the “‘gettipg” of it that occupled their sttention, Five young ladies of Denver, Ool,, ride the bycicle ‘‘man fashion,” cisd in black velvet kuee-braeches, woolen high stock- ings, a polo cap and a sack coat, with low cut bycicle shoes. The Denver masculines are all learniug toride, 10 ua to accompany the girls in thelr ¢pln: The dudine is the name applied te the female dude. The dudine wears a mashed gooweberry colored hat and » high collar, and hor clothes are made to fit tight, She carries a shary -pointed paesdol in llen of the duds came, and is often accompanied by an Eoglish pug terrier, A newly-arrived bride from the goose countries, says The San Froncisco Post, got fearfully mad besause when she sent for a little ginger at the Palace the other day the clerk saked hor if she was suffor. ing from cholera infantum, *‘And we just married, too: the cheeky thing.” Polonaiacs and princesse tunics, pointed bodices, with panier scarfs and jackets draped with plain, bright solors iu surah or aateen, profusely trimmed with lace, and worn over skirts of flowered sateen, either trimmed with the same or plain, and edged with a rache or a fan-pleating of lace, will be very fashionably worn, Burnished gold, mandarin yellow, and the creamy shade f raw silk are the tints in yellow moro favored this season than that of old gold or copper color, so fashion. able lnat yoar; while ange green has given | laat way to a peouliar lmlm.,imn known as porphyry; and cadet blue is replaced by nemophilac—the color of that flower, Handeome toilets of strawherry.calored ottoman silk are shown, with deep flounces edged with wide cross-way bands of da eat plam-colored velyet, the flounces being veral rows of drooping puffs. ping is a blending of the two ; the sides have panels of the velvet, and the graceful Babet coat o) ovlor n embroidered waistcoat, also of t! velv A young lady in_St. Louis became dis- satisfied with ber beantiful natural teeth they were not just according to t fanoy ia teeth, She had a dent. upper ones out and make her weetheart was getting a set nd the dentist gave him the natural ones he had taken from the jaws of his lady love. They both thought it was an awfully cute thing. Swell people usually order their teeth made with some defect or # gold plug or two in them, An enterprising Baltimorean has opened o burean for furniehing male escorts to Iadies who are 8o unfortunateas notto have any gentlemen friends they can depend on, The photos of the escorts nre kept in al- bums, which are tent by _messenger to the hease of tho applicont, She selects her mon, and he presonts himoelf dreseed for opers, church aud ovening calls,and serves her faithfully for $1 an hour, unless the time employed exceeds two hours, then it 19 lees, They are mcst in demand during the amusement season, To Let, A youth went out to senenade The Iady whom he loved best, Avd passed benonth the mannion’s shade, Whero orst hor chamber uved to reat. Ho warbled till the morning light, Came dancing o'er the hi ltows’ rim, But no fair maiden blemed his sight Aud all seemed dark snd drear to him, With Leart aglaw snd eyes ableza," " He drew much nearer than before, When, to his horror and amaze, Ho saw ““To Let” upon the door, SINGULARITIES, A flock of not less than thousand pelie cans passed over Charles City, Is., the other day. One was thot that measured two feot across the wings, An electric light about the size of & small beau has been constructed and used successtully in illuminating interior por. tions of the human body. The surface of an aerolite which fell in » field near Brescia, Italy, on the 18th of March, was smoking hot, emitted a sl phurous smell and was covered with a greenish black crust, full of small holes, A man on Cow Creek, Tuolumne county, Cal,, is making mq iruoning a skunk ranch, nimal's secretion, so offen. sive to the Caucasian nostrils, is highly prized by Chinsse as & medicine, and they Py a large price for it. Au the steamship I, O, Harris Iay in the mouth of the Brazos river, not far from Galveston, during a recent fog, an unusu. ly large wildcat clambered up over the side, hoving floated down the river on some drift. The boys lassoed and cag: dit, Miss Fannie Mills, of Sandus Ohi i not an overly big woman, but great foot on her, One of her wh on exhibition in s mureum, is soventeen inches long, seven inches wide, elgbtecn inches around the snkle and twenty.two inches around the heel, The mad.stone, or calculus, is found in the paunch of a deer or cow. It s claimed by those who have faith in the mad-stome that it adheren to the wonad until it be. comen ol off, plication is rene rged with poison, when it drops It is then soaked in milk, and theap- 1t is estimated that the disease- Te tea by thirty mad dogs aud outlived them An ostrich farm exists in Egypt, near Cairo. It extends from what is known as the Virgin's tree to the desert, and com- Krlul several acres of land surrounded by igh mud wa! Of this farm the greater part is desert, the looss, pebbly sand being necessary to the health and effiviency of the ostrich, About 120 birds are st pres- ent living cn the farm, Fifteen of them are female and twelve] are male adults, all the ethers ara above one year of age, though not yet old enough tolay. Further statistics about those birds are thet twalve of the adults sre now engaged in layiug and that three are engaged in hatching— one beinguzon twenty-one eggs, ome upon fourteen, and one upon elaven. The averags weight of 20,000 men and women weighed at Boston in 15854 was: Men, 141§ pounds; women, 124} pounds. At tho recent Cincinnati Industrial expo- sition, the department of sciemtific and educational ap) ces detailed a clork to { ¥ DY K - M | plexion.” The detectives exultingly m i j i) : a note of it / Silk jerseys, gloves in strawberry red, ! A BLE ¥l | pale yellow, nun's gray, and biack will'be ¥ 3 : more in vogue this summer than kid gloves Efl | of suy sort, Six lovely ma'dens of Troy, N. Y., have built » raft on which they interd to spend the summer, floating up and down the Hudson river, A Newark girl bas put an ‘artificil rate tlesnake into her Boston cousin’s room to frighten bim, He is now dangerously ill with brain fever, In French importations of costumes the polouaise reappears once and again in T CHAICHES THE BLOOD 40 BTRENGTHENS THE DIGESTIVE F0 PORES 4 ALSTOMES ThE CICULATION 2= o\LARK, 459.:....".“ MAHA, NEB. Ml PUAOSES Tl euRk g o N Enieroat 00 _OMAHA, NEB. record the weights of western men and women, The number weighod was 22,115, and the total weight was 3,07 The men weighed number 7,457, weighing 1,150,108 bounds, The women weighed numbered 8, ~ weighing 2 195 pounds w he average welght was 150 57, weight of 141 men from Obio was 167.85; the average weight of 179 wo. menwas 13326, The average weight of 124 men from Southern Indisna and Ii- nois was 168 52 pounds; the average weight of 193 women was 133,05 The average weight of 114 men from Kentucky was 168.82 pounds; the average weight of 188 women was 133,76, Oalifornia. 000 this season from *‘Sam’l of Posen ® | and MUBIOAL AND DRAMATIO Nilswon dotes on canvass back duck, ~Modjeska loves thoroughbred horees, Mary Anderson’s strong weakness is yachting. Annle Pixley will spend the summer in The *'Black Crook” has been_ revived in New York at the Grand opers house, M. B. Curtis claims to have netted Wilhem!j proposer, it is said, to estab. lish a vlol’m lgboul at Biebrich, on the Rbine, J. Svendsen, the well-known Norwegian comporer, has been appointed conductor of the Copenhagen opera, Modjeska is creating s farore in San Francisco, Miss Ida 0ff, her new lead. ing Iady, is highly spoken of by the local pre s Salnt Saens’ opers, “Henry VIIL,” hos proved a grand success iu Paris, It how already been played almcst twenty times, always to a full house, Marie Prescott’s new play ‘‘Czeka” has roved a success ot the Grand opera house, Yllonllym Mr. Lewis Mortison shared the honors with the star, Mme, Gabriella Boema, sopran-, is to be the lending xoloiat of the 234 annual fonti of the German Saengerbund of North America, which is to be held at Buffalo in July next. Milton Nobles, Fred Warde, Frank Mayo, Aonie Ward Tiffany, Frank Koche, Mortimer, James Hardie and Tom are wll residents of Brooklyn, For- are pumerous. A son of the famous tenor, Theodore Wachtel, a jaweler by trade, and possess- ing a voice greatly resembling his fathe is soon to make hi*appearance on the stage of the Hamburg City theatre, Haverly not having succeeded in mecur- ing llnd’lng man for his “'Silver King” company has sant over to England for » couple, Leading men are quoted low in England, though at a terrible premium here, The Vokes family, it Is said, made the worat failure in San Franciscoever known, and yot they persist in playing ‘‘Cousin Joe,” and their other thread-bare pieces that should have been shelved several years ago, Rapid progress is being made on Ran- kin's New York theatre, on Third avenue near Thirtieth strest, Mr, Rankin is himselt superintending the construction, 1t will be ready for occupancy toward the t week in August. M. Maurice Strakosch has returned to to_arraneing for the PP Emma Thursby in opers, and aleo to cudeaver to effect an en- gagement with a German opera company to come to this country next season. Dr. Damrosch has crganized a concert company for & western tour, consisting of an orchestra of 56 pisces and a number of singers, among whom are Mme, Scalohi Mlle, Isadora Martinez, A guaran- tee of 870,000 has been given by twenty- seven citizens, PEPPE~MINT DROPS, A new Georgia paper is The Wiregrass Crack. This cracker is to be fired firat on June 16, The restaurant strawberry short-cake is rather shorter in quantity this year than usaal, People in Kansas and Nebraska are still burniog cora, The corn burns as it goes down unless coplously diluted with water. Railroads and rapid transportation haye worked wonders, Minnesota people go to strawberry parties in sleighs and warm up on sliced cucuambers, In the recent municipal election in At lauta, Gs., the cow was the i-suo, the question being whether or not cows shall allowed to run at large in that city. The result was in favor of free cows, Four of Ssmmy Tilden’s nephewa haye spent nearly $200,000 in two years. They e invested in semson tickets to t1 conoert and spent one summer in Saratoga,~Norristown Herald, A win sitting in the back room of a ealoon playing euchre breathea about cighteen times per minute. A female voice suddenly falls on his ea-, and his respiration jumps to forty-nine quicker'n soat. Wiggins rather missed 1t regardiog a big general wind storm, but if hs had cut it up into elices, and let one go now snd then as a cyclone, he would at this tiwe be sitting on the topend of the ladder of fame, “‘Where are the springs of long ago?’ writes Kdith M, Thomas, in sweetly flowing verse. Give it up, Bdith, Some of them may be banging in that old hoop skirt in the attic.--New Orleans Picayune, A Missouri maiden’s mistake: the sweetest-looking girls in th dislocated her should other day by kicking a cat. Handsome is as handsome does, but she should not kick with her right arm,—Atchison Globe, A girl shouldn’t wear a black belt about her waist when sl got & white dress on and is wi llns with & young man in the night time. It makes ‘it appesr from a rear view as if her_ fellow h is arm around her waist,- -Buffalo News, Tho deacon’s son was telling the ‘minis. One of ter about the bee: ng his pa, and the minister inquired: *'Stung your pa, did they? what did your pa by og ‘moment,” said the boy ;ld her whisper it to you,”—Peck's un, “My face is my fortune, sir!” indig- nantly responded » fleshy youog lady when her suitor delicately attempted to sound her financial prospects *‘It i cer- tainly a large one,” dryly responded the oung man a8 he took his hat and cane to eave,—Burlington Free Press, There is a young fellow in our neighbor. hood whohas been making a daily practice of attempting tosing, ‘‘Liet me lika a sol. dier dis,” He aeems to crave death, and they do say that one of the neighbors who hasa musket is preparing to accommodate bim,~Cineinnati Saturday Night. New York’s *‘best society” now cut their own bread at the table on a plate made of wood from the Holy Lund and with » knife purchased in Damascus, except on on fgreat oconsions, when the eldest daughter, just from Vassar, mukes the bread berself, Tnen it is placed on of marble from Italy and cut with an » from thewoodshed.—[ Wicked Philadelphia Paper, Probably the noatest form ever see! 8sying a maen has the delirium tremen: the following from the Rolls, Mo, A tarmer named John Findleman, livin, threo and & quarber miles morthwest of Sulem, in plowing for corn the other day, came acroes a little black jug, Uncook. ing it he found 1t to contain forty.reven suakes of different species. varying in lewath from four to reven inches This spring there was talk that the af. fairs of a certain county treasurer in Ohio were not exactly right, ard a committee was sppoiated to examine his booka. He received the committee in the kindest manner, but instead of placing the books before them, he. said: *‘Gentlemen, it is generally supposed that I am shert?” *‘Iy is” “How much? 'And you are bound to investigate aro,” It will take you six wee cost the county £500 to overhaulmy hool won't it?” *I preume #0,” Thea for t sake of the overburdened aud oppressed texpavers, 1 will confess that I am short $24,675,25! No use wasting the taxpayers' money to hunt up my stealings!”"—Ex, RELIGIOUS. Tre Congregational churches of New Englaod have hiad sn_ acoession of 1,600 membera since January 1. 'The honor of being the oldest English church in Ameries is claimed by the old Friends' church in Beatav, Va, The Rev, Father Moonsy, of Newburg, X — ] —_—————u= STEELE, SJHNSON & C0., WHOLESALE GROCERS AND JOBBERS IN N. Y. foally Newman H 1,071 memb schools have ers. The Contenary of the Protestant Epi | oharch of Maryland will be ce ed on May 29, in Si, Pan’s church, Baltimore, Ths wubject of "reunion hetween the North and South Presbyterian church has been a prominent topic cf discussion inthe recent meetings of the presbyteries, The eolored church at Austin, Arkan- #as, being half full of water one Sunday during the recent floods, the preacher mounted the roof and preached to » con- gregation assembled in skiffs, An Anti.Oplum Prayer Union has been formed in Great Britain, of which the memMrs residing in different parts cov. enant to prayer at lsast once & week, on Thuradays, for the overthrow of the appalliug and accursed opium trade in Chins and e sewhere, ARy Dr. J, T, Daryes, who was once bright and shiouing light among the clergy of Troy, now of the Central Con- gregational church in Boston, declining a 1t an ther paatorate, says: ‘B is the hardest pl; honest work in Unitariani here, and i ) he'd better stay a sys that ‘‘New York is numer. test city in the world.” 's church in London has Ita thirteen Sanday 500 children and 400 tesch- [ Flour, 8alt, Sugars, Canned OCoods, ana All Grocers’ Supplies. A Full Lino of the Best Brands of GIGARS AND MANUFACTURED TOBAGCO. ipents_for BRNWOOD RAILY ARD LAFL W & RAND POWDER 00 - P. BOYEE JO° =—=DEALERS IN=e= HALL'S SAFE AND LOCK GO. Fire and Burglar Prao &S A e JEE &5 N AULTS, EOOCOXK &, . 1020 Farnham Street, ORNEAFILA. - -~ = RTEXE CGATH CITY PLANING MILLS. MANUFACTURKRS OF Carpenter’'s Materials SASH, DOORS, BLINDS, STAIRS, Stair Railings, Balusters, Window and Door Frames, Etc. Pirst-olass facilities for the Manufacture of all kinds of Monldings, Ploning ana ruatching a Specialty, Orders from the country,will bo promptly executed. addressatl communioutions to A, MOYER, Proprictoy 2 on the planet to do n Kvangelical church, has the intellectusl lead 1s in & hurry for results ay. IM eI LT, John Jasper is nearly sixty years old, and the older he grows the more he be. lieves “‘de son do move.” Jasper is tall and very black, Some men get religon and some men get vaccination, It is wonderful how many cases there are in which neither the rligion nor the vaccination “‘takes,” Tony Pastor haa just paid 68,000 for a sidence in New York. Very fow n afford 0 expensive # iux: then, few pastors have 8o large a Boston Transcript. “‘General” Booth, of the Salvation Army, complainy of growing old prema- turely through hard cam paigning sgainst worldly wickedness, He would probably like o bo placed on’tho retired list under ull pay All the Asian authorities agree that if & profane skeptic should undertake to chop or twist off the sacred tail of a gen- uine white elephant he wou!d meet with Idnd‘:ln death. A like divinity doth hedge » male, Some of the New York churches nave sextons’ and ,undertakors’ signs posted on their fronts, and the gentlewen who hold forth {nside have so much to say of death, worms, &o,, that people are complaining about it, ‘‘Are youa member of the church?” asked a man of a friend who had been ex- tolling in glowing language the eloquencs of a certain paator, ‘‘Not gexactly,’ he replied, *‘but I am on such good terms with the deacons that the trustees now shake hands with me every time I attend sServices there,” A Kentucky man when dying last week told the watchers at bis bedride that he saw heaven. Mo probably had a vision of, ring of living Bourbon whisky, flowing betweem two banks of sugar and lemon, with high-toned gentlemen’ stanc- ing on either shore shooting at each other with gold-plated revolvers,—Kansas City Journal, “John, T am going to church, and if it should rain I wish you would come with the umbrella for me; however, you need not ceme unless it shouldrain dowaright.” The gentloman went. It did rain, but John hvd gone to the other end of town to see Mary. His mastor came bask with drenched garments and a look of implacs- ble anger. *“Jobn,” said he, “why didn't you bring the umbrell«?” *‘Becsuse, sir,” replied John, ‘it rained slanting!” PBAL an evening prayer meoting in & neigh- boriug town, as tho 9 o'clock bell cexsed ringing, the clergyman who presided aross and spoke in n most solomn and impre ive manner of the reminder they had just received froni the bells of the flight of time and of the necessity of spending time well while it is curs to improve, When he sat down an eldsrlf' female arose, ant in a shrill voice startled the assembly by re- marking in a contradictory tone: “‘I think it muet be.” —— Not1his Spring. I would not die 1n spring time And miss the turnip green, & the pooty eongs of the little frawgs, And the sky lark’s early screams; When the bieds begin their wooing, & the taters 's1n to eprout; A .. DAILEY, MANUFACTURER OF FINE BUGCIES, GARRIAGES & SPRING WAGONS My Repository {s Conetantly filled with a Seleot Stock, Beat W7 O R EC VLA S ELL B> GUARANTERED. cagtory. 3. W, Cor. Loon ana uapitol Avenue, m 2 me-ly WILLIAMV SNYDER, MANUFACTURER OF CARRIAGES, BUGGIES, ATID ILOAID W.aGON S, First-Olass Painting and Trimming, Repairing Promptly Dons. 1321 and 1323 Harney Strect, corner Fourteenth Street, Omaha, Neb. 2 DOUIMIL £ ATNID SINGILE ACTING POWER AND HAND 2T W5 NE. B S Y b | The old gentleman is 91 years of sge and : | thauiol Thayer, banker, of Boston Stearn Pumps, Engine Trimmings, MINING MACHIREGY, BELTING, DOSE, BRASS AND IRON FITTINGE FPIP PACKING, AT WIHOLESALE 4ND RETAIL, HALLADAY WIND-MILLS CHURCH AND SCHOO. EELLS Oor. Farnam and 10th Streets Omaha, Neb. When the turkeys go s gobbling- - I wud not then peg out, ETRAN I would not dye in summer & leave the garden eass, The ross ed ham and buttermilk, The cool place in the grass, I would not dye in summer, When everything's so hot, & leave the whisky juleps— Oh, know! I'd rather not, T would not die in autumn, ‘With peaches fit for eating; When wavy cora is getting rips & kandidates are treating, Phor these and other reasons I'd dye not in the Phall, &, sence I've thought it over, T weuld not d; t all, CONNGBIALITIHS. An embossed satin mlrrlng;mmlllic:r o 'THE LEADING MUSIC HOUSE IN THE WRST! General Agents for the for bride last week cost Eouu-ion of such a certificate as that will eep her husband in good humor when the first baby yells every night for six months at a stretch, it is well worth the money,— The Oldest Wholesale and Retail JEWELRY HOUSE Baltimore Day. in Omaha, Visitors can here The widow of Congressman Smith, A’: flnd a].l novo“;ies in SIL_ Salem, Aln., has marrisd her nephew, Finest and Best Pianos and he 1 . . sy (e couple mesk s Kentuckyr s | Vil WARE. CLOCKS, | groang manufactured, Beasees where ey wors o™ T | Rich and Stylish Jewelry, yué prioes 5 » Losw a: At a marringe which took place a few the Latest, Most Artistic an; astern Manufacture Tl Sovon Mgt h ' and Dealer, and Choicest Selections in PRECIOUS STONES and all descripuions of FINE WATCHES at as Low Pri- ces as 18 compatible with honorable dealers. Call and see our Elegant New Store, Tower Building, corner 11th and Farnham Btreots bridegroom a bachelor aged eighty, and the bride was given away by hsr grandson, Josiah Hurd and wife, of Benningten, Vt., celebrated last week the sevéntieth lnniverur{ of their marrisge in the same house in which they began housekeeping nearly three-quarters of a century ago, Pianos and O-gavs sold for cash or installmeut: at Bottom Prices. A SPLENDID stock of Steinway, Chickering, Knabe, Vose & Son’s Pi- anos, and othv r makes, Also Clough & Warsen 8terling, Impsrial, Smith American Oreans, & Do not fail to see us!;before purchasing,! MAX MEYER & BRO,, MANUFAGTURERS OF SHOW GASES A Large Stockalways on Hand. FREDERIG GCOAL. The only Coal mined west of the Misdissippi River that is equ in quality to the ROCK SPRING COAL. THE ONLY IOWA COAL That will stock for & year without slacking or shrinking, Pronounced by all the leading brick men in Western Towa us the very best coal for burning brick ever used in the West, EUREKA COAL AND MINING CO., Frederic, Monroe Co., Iowa. his wife 87, John ¥, Andrew, whose father, o penni lets Maine boy, grow famous as tho war governor of M husetts, will be married shortly to the dsughter of the late nfi" ol Thayer's fortune is placed at $2,500,000, though her grandfather was a country clergyman, as poor as a church monse, @ AMARKT 5, ASPECIFICFOR SN e N e, Spasms, | R B¢ FAILS nd Trregula fousn, st n $1.50, at LD ¥ *It cured where phys! e &a-Correspondence freely answered. &3 THE DR, §, A, RICHMOND MED, C0., PROPRIETORS, 8T, JOSEPH, MO. an Por testimonials and circulars send stamp.