The Nonpartisan Leader Newspaper, December 16, 1918, Page 2

ADVERTISEMENTS ADVERTISEMENTS SATISFYING RELIEF FROM LUMBAGO Sloan’s Lin.iment' ‘hao the Why They Leave the Farm The Agricultural Review is credited with a poem, widely circulated in the Northwest, giving the alleged reason why the boy leaves the farm. An ex-farmer has warmed these verses over to answer the more important ques- tion of why the “old man” leaves, Probably if we cou'd remove the reason for the fathers leaving, we wouldn’t have to worry much about th_e young ~ fellows. Here are the original half-baked verses and the others which have gotten nearer the truth with more cooking: - Co-Operation Spells Success This is the reason that we are urging you to patronize your own sell- ing agency. We know that if you will give us a trial con- signment of grain or live stock that you will be- come our steady -cus- tomer. We have thou- sands of satisfied cus- tomers and would like to add you to our list of shippers. Market quotations and shipping instructions will be forwarded upon request. Equity Co-Operative Exchange St. Paul, Minn. RES TR RS u WEARWELL T CUT OUT THE TIRE PROFITEER We ship them to you C. 0. D. ON APPROVAL NO MONEY IN ADVANCE tAnd every tire is guaran- to be perfect in ma- terial and workmanship. Size Plain Skid Tubes 80x3 $ 8.80 $ 9.60 $2.00 80x38 11.60 12.50 2.50 82x3 13.45 14.50 2.65 81x4 17.35 18.70% 8.16 82x4 17.60 19.00 8.26 83x4 18.50 20.00 8.30 84x4 18.95 20.40 8.45 86x4% 25.856 28.06 4.40 87xb 30.80 88.56 5.40 INNER TUBES FULLY GUARANTEED Other Sizes In Stock. EQUITY TIRE COMPANY 1208 Hennepin, Minneapolis WEARWELL TIRES WEARWELL MONEY TALKS YOU ARE LOOKING FOR THE LAST CENT Our salesmen will get it for you if you ship your live stock to The Indeperdent Commission Co. So. St. Paul, Minn. Chicago, III SHIP Live Poultry, Dressed Veal, Eggs, Beans and Hides to H. : A. ERTZ 25 E. 3rd St., St. Paul, Minn. Always pay highest prices. Checks daily. X rite_for price list and tags. SHIP US YOUR CREAM md POULTRY Highest. market -prices. - Prompt ' remit- tances. Reference any bank. or wholesale house. . MILLER & HOLMES ST. PAUL, MINN. POULTRY WANTED “Highest' Market' Price Paid-for Turkeys, Chickens, Geese and Ducks No Commission Charged. License No. G-19453. ‘We batk with -the First and Sccurity National Bank. WITT’S MARKET HOUSE 705-709 Hennopin, Dept. G, Minncapolis, ‘Minn. **Méntion the Tesdar When Weiting. Advertisers S T S E A BRI A ik 2P S I R VL T M S T S . SRS WHY THE BOY LEAVES “Why did you leave the farm my lad? Why did you bolt and leave your dad? Why did you beat it off to town And turn your poor old father down? Thinkers of pulpit, platform and press Are wallowing in deep distress. -— They seek to.know the hidden cause Why farmer boys desert their pas.” “Well, stranger, since you’ve been so frank, I'll roll aside the hazy bank: I left my dad, his farm, his plow, Because my calf became his cow. I left my dad, ’twas wrong, of course, Because my colt became his horse. I left my dad to sow and reap, Because my lamb became his sheep. I dropped the hoe and stuck the fork Because my pig became his. pork. The garden truck that I made grow, Was his to sell and mine to hoe. “It’s not the smoke in the atmosphere, Nor the state of life that brought me here. Please tell the platform, pulpit and press, Nor fear of toil, or love of dress, Is driving off ‘the farmer lads. It’s just the methods of ‘their dads.” —Agricultural Review. WHY THE OLD MAN LEAVES “Why did you leave the farm, good man?” The unobserving ass began. “Why did you beat it off to town, And turn your independent living down? Thinkers of pulpit, platform, press Are wallowing in deep distress. They can not find a rhyme or reason For farmers’ leaving every season.” "And straightway Farmer Jones re- plied: “The pulpit, platform, press have lied. Full well the bluffers know the reason For farmers leaving every season. Their bankers gathered 12 per cent, And half of us were gouged with rent. Their market plutes skimmed off the top, We held the sack when prices dropt. They caught us when we came to sell And soaked us when we bought as well. ’ The game is rigged by the grasping men Who boss the lads of the tongue and pen. It wasn’t the sidewalk farmer’s guile, Nor my dislike for the country style That made me prefer two bucks a day To the ‘fine old farm’ in Ioway; But the simple, plain and well-known fact— ‘Too many thieves rode on my-back,” —Ex-Farmer. PLUTOCRATS AND PEACE TERMS After the partly sophisticated ones had argued for a long time as to how our big business leaders would stand in regard to Wilson’s 14 peace terms, they decided to go to consult the wise man. Having heard their difficulty, the wise man borrowed a dollar bill and studied it intently for a moment with the attitude of a man who is anxious to make entirely sure of his point. “I can not ‘find a single one of the 14 terms on this bill,” declared the wise man, “yet this bill states everything in which the parties you inquire about are interested either at home or abroad.” ; “Who then, besides the president, are interested in these democratic terms ?” asked several of the crowd. “Only those who have none of these things or those who hold a few of them temporarily, somewhat as I hold this bill and must return it now that our discussion of the plutocrats has closed.” A TIP FOR OLD GANG SPIELERS Whenever you hear someone say anything against the profiteers, rip out the word bolsheviki, exploding the first syllable and rolling the rest of it under the tongue so that it comes out “bull-shewekee” and at the same time make a face as if you were about to have to eat a plate of fried angle- worms.: On some people this word so pronounced will have all the effect that “Boo” does on the youngster who has not yet learned what the terrible “Boo” means. In public discourse the effect ‘of this efficient rendering of the word is much like that which prohi- bition lecturers used to secure.on thirsty souls by the mere mention of that .terrible 'old Russian. disease—. scotchwhiski. : A NEGLECTED RUSSIAN ATROCITY . (Special to the Plutocrat) Interviewed today in London by a staff correspondent of the. Morning Plutocrat in regard to his views on Russia,” Lord = Percy Cocktail-Chaser declared that he had ‘expressed his PAGE horror of the revolution the day after the czar abdicated and consequently the world was well aware of his posi- tion. (s 4 “But,” continued his lordship, “your American press has overlooked, per- haps for reasons of selfish policy and play to the galleries, one of the great atrocities of that atrocious affair. Certainly the point has not been over- looked by the social leaders of Amer- ica and the sympathy of the great American republic should be awakened to demand justice: ? “What I have in mind is the fact that many of the daughters of your best families as well as ours have been married into the Russian nobility. Many an American father has paid millions of pounds for such an ex- change. But now that the Russian nobility have been abolished what do these fathers (mot to mention ~the serious predicament of the daughters) have for their sacrifice? Nothing. ‘What is a Russian husband worth without a title? Was there ever more pittiless deception practiced by a na- tion? - . “When our daughters entered upon these marriages there’was the under- standing implied, although not men- tioned in the marriage contract be- cause of the delicacy attending such things, that the husbands would re- main noble. The faith of the Russian nation was pledged ‘that they would remain noble. * “Surely now that the war is.over, | both we and America can spare suffi- cient armed forces to bring the Rus- sian riff-raff to their senses and to a proper sense of obligation to some of our best families. 'The public should realize that an injury to a few, in this case a few of our best people, is an injury to all and, as I said before, they - should demand full justice.” Why Eges Won’t Hatch Evory fertllo egg won’t hatch, can’t be made to hatch d unless the proper method of incubation .is !'gllnwad. Buil Minnea; Mayer’s Hatchery, 844 Se: polis, R6sota, Wil el Toes s Ber hl tells gaw tl?l ltutlillll 'b% ln(;uube:’tor lumb full of chicks, - The amphlet w m: ; this Daper_write for it immediately’—Ady. i punch that relieves theumatiq'_ twinges This warmth-giving, congestion- scattering circulation-stimulating rem- edy peneirates without rubbing right to the aching spot and brings quick relief, surely, cleanly. A wonderful help for external pains, sprains, strains, stiffe ness, headache, lumbago, bruises. Get your bottle today—costs little, means much. Ask your druggist for it by name, Keep it handy for the whole family, The big bottle is economy. We want your FURS to fill or- ders at_the highest -prices known in the FUR trade in years. Ship us_your FURS with your own valu- - -ation ‘on them. If we can not use them: at your figures we will return them prepaid. If you are not one - of our shippers write or wire_at once for latest market report. It's RELIABLE, We wire um'ars on lots of $50.00 and up, and hold upon request any lots separate until our returns have been approved. CENTRAL FUR CO KANSAS CITY, MO. "FOSTER” TANNING A vs Tan Your Hide And yot will be delighted with the fine robe or coat you can have at Largest cm'ravfl'o ?‘ [ om. Tanners Northwesteris Farmers., s«:g for circula? and tags. 8 Tor protat. Bet sans e Iohey 4 a e prices. . Get our price list free. FOSTER ROBE & TANNING CO., 1607 5th 8t. 8. &., ‘ln‘g”pollc. Mian. - - | @uaranteed Tanning : ‘We tan from a horse hide to = ] anytl a a%" coata, robes, mittens, fur sets and %repl:ffllgland Taxidermista’ wor! peatly done." : ok g Pl tags, Wo oan pave you money.. W\ SqguarelDeal Tanning Co. == Qfd Relial nners s ‘520 Washisgea - Datrelt, GET THE HIGHEST PRICE > FOR YOUR FURS prompt returns. - - “on'Furg and Hides." HENRY STREIFF FUR CO. Dept.12 Monroe, Wis. PAY HIGHEST MAR- et \ant pollltry, eggs, futs, hides, pelts; 8. L. McKAY & CO. 7 E. Third St., St. Paul, Minn. Mention the Leader When Writing Adyertisers