The Nonpartisan Leader Newspaper, June 28, 1917, Page 12

Stick and Slick Discuss Baer Two Views of the Farmers’ Candidate for Congress by Rip By I. B. RIP, the Reporter. Deer Mistur Editur: It iz with grate haste that I seet myself to rite you a few lines to let you know that I am havin’ a high ole time visitin’ with my ole frend Stick—Will Stick, an’ also to tell you about a little conflab which I heerd down at the village last Saturday. Me an’ Stick had gone down to the town to git the male an’ when he got hiz paper he seed by it that the Non- partisan Leeg had indorsed John M. Baer, the famous cartonist uv the Non- partisan Leeder, for Congressman frum the furst dustrict. When Stick seed that he went strate up in the air, went around an’ around on wun laig, whoop- ed like a Ute injin an’ like to a-had fifty-seven varieties uv fits all in wiun minnit. “By the jumpin’-jimminy cats,” he exclaimed, “that’s grate, that's grate, It cudn’t be grater—cudn’t be better— cudn’'t be beet. Baer, the cartoonist for Congress! Whod-a thought it? Jist the man—jist the man! I don’t see why I didn’t think uv him before. I've bin rackin’ my brane trying to figger out who wud be the best man— an’ thar he is—jist the man—jist the man!"” WENT PLUM KRAZY ABOUT BAER I thought he’d gone plum cra;zy an’ we’d have to taik him to jimtown rite away an’ I cudn’t get the idea uv what he wuz a-rasen sich .a to-do about. I - ‘wuz standin’ thar with my mouth open, my ize a-stickin’ out like the ize uv a cuntry boy at a circus an’ question marks a-runnin’ up above my hed like grey squerills runnin’ up a grape vine. “Jist lamp that over wunce an’ tell me what you think about it,” he sed stickin’ the paper under my nose an’ pintin’ hiz finger at the pictchure on the frunt paige. - “Aint that the stuff! Aint that the red-hot stuff!” he ex- claimed az enthusiasm an’ exhuberance oozed frum every pore uv his skin an’ a smile like a reath uv roses run clean frum -wun year to the uther an’ hiz ize danced with joy. “How in the naim uv the grate Horn Spoon iz it that the Leeg can allus pick the rite man fur the rite place at the rite time. How iz it that thay’ve allus got the rite man stickin’ around sum whur reddy jist reddy to put thur hans on? Can you tell me that Mr. Rip, now can you?” I konfessed that it wuz a puzzel to me—even ef he wuz the rite man, fur I'll be dingfuzzelled ef you can prove ennything by me. I'm not a expert in this politicks bizness an’ don't profess to know who iz a good man an’ who iz a bad wun. Stick—had sorter quieted down an’ wuz leanin’ up agin’ the counter, an’ wuz reedin’ the detales uv the artickle while radiant smiles chased eachuther an’ plade tag all over hiz beamin’ face. Jist then a smug lookin® feller with a close-cropped mustash cum in an’ went over, unlocked hiz- box an’ got out his male. Purty sune he cum along back past whur we wuz standin’ an’ az he cum he wuz lookin’ over the mornin’ paper. He glanced up an’ seein’ Stick stepped over an’ sed, sez he: “Good mornin’, Mr. Stick.” Stick looked up an’ sed, “Good morn- in’, Mr. Slick.” “I see your Leeg haz put up a man fur congress,” sed Slick, speakin in metalic tones while a frown clouded aiz already dark face. “You bet it haz an’ he’s a good wun, t00,” started in Stick with. hiz saim tone uv enthusiasm. NOT A CANDIDATE OF THE BANKERS “T don’t see how vyou figger that out,” sed Slick, pullin’ at hiz stubby mustash., “That feller aint no farmer an’ don’'t know nuthni’ about farmin’ nor the farmin’ problem. All he can do is maik a few pictchures an’ most uv them air an insult to most uv the respectable peeple uv this stait.” " The smiles that had reathed Stick’s fase had faded away an’ he took on the appearance uv a combinashun be- tween a thunder storm, a hurricain an’ 8 Kansas cyclone. The lightenin’s flashed a few blindin’ an’ brilliant flashes.an’ the thunders begin to mut- ter an’ growl an’ I immagined I cud heer a few big hale stones fallin on the house tops. “Whoze askin’ you fur your opinion?’ he demanded in tones that bit like car- bolick acid, “We didn’t expect to git a candidate that wud pleeze the bank- ers an’ so we didn’t ast 'em enny thing about it. You an’ a few uv your kind have been puttin’ all the candidates in this stait until this Leeg cum along an’ now you aint got nuthin’ but abuse for every man it puts up—even ef it shud put up a saint.” “Of course he aint what you’d ex- actly call a farmer—though he wuz born an’ raized on a farm an’ though he haz managed a big farm out in the western part uv the stait an’ though don’t mean that he don’t understand the farmers’ problems. That’s what we want—a man who understands the prob- lems. Pursonally I wudn’t be fit fur a congressman. 1 don’t know anuf—I haint got the ability. I’ve had to wurk on the farm too much an’ I haint got the edicashun. This man Baer haz maid a studdy uv theze questions. He knows the ins an’ outs uv all the farm- in’ game—that iz the bizness end uv the gaim. It aint knowin’ when to plant taters an’ sow wheat that quali- fies a man to be uv service az a farm- ers’ representative in Congress. Thar's a bizness end to farmin’ an’ that’s the marketin’ end. We know how to raise stuff an’ we know how to market il, too, fur that matter. But the trouble iz This is John Baer, cartoonist for the Nonpartisan Leader, in the makeup of one of his most famous characters, Hiram Rube. The creator of “Hiram” is never more at home than in the garb of Hiram himself making a chalk talk to the farmers. No one knows better than Hiram’s creator the problems of the farmers or has a more lively and determined interest in their welfare. He was' born and reared on a farm, has managed a big farm and is still interested in a farm. Merchants and the League (From ~thé Cando (N. D.) Record) If there is one class of citizens that is more than any other class under the absolute domination of the middle- man, it is the country merchants, and it has been a constant source of sur- prise to us to find men of this kind hostile to the program of the Non- partisan league. The writer of these lines being in possession of first-hand knowledge of the facts, is prepared to say that oountry merchants - suffer just as severely as the farmers and other classes of consumers from the ex- actions of wholesalers and commission merchants. These middlemen take the hog’s share,” leaving the country mer- chant to charge a big stiff price for his goods, but with only a pittance of prof- it in many cases. We are aware that the average country merchant makes only a fair living—in most cases only B or 6 per cent on his investment, while * the wholesale houses produce for their stockholders the most enormous divi- dends of any combination of capital in the country, not excepting the pub- lic service and financial corporations. If the country merchants could be Jjolted out of their preseht hopeless rut, into a sense of their true situation, they would flock to Mr. Townley and say: ‘Let’s have a merchant’s branch of the Nonpartisan league so that we may fight for fairness and justice in our branch of industry, as the farmers are successfully fighting for fairness and justice in agriculture.” If the rapacious army of middlemen are to be successfully combatted the country merchant will have to get into the fight. He may cry out against the mail order houses until he is black in the face, but the fact remains that these mail order houses are only over- grown merchants who have been able to eliminate the middleman, and have divided the resultant profits between themselves and the consumers, taking, of course, the lion’s share for them- selves. o ; We don’t know whether country merchants will be admitted to the League, but in our humble opinion they ought to be there, working shoulder to shoulder with the farmer in exterminating the pirates who now have a lead-pipe cinch on their pros- perity and livelihood. PAGE THIRTEEN as Witnessed the laws haint bin maid in our in- terest. They’ve bin maid in the in- terest uv the guys that speculate in our farm products—that’s why we need men in Congress that knows that end uv the gaim.” He pauzed a minnit while the banker prepared to launch anuther attack, HIS CARTOONS SERMONS TO THE FARMERS “Jist wait a minnit,” sed Stick, “I haint dun yit. You sed about all he can do iz maik a few pictchures an’ most uv ’em air ‘insultin’ to lots uv peeple in this stait’ I'm glad to hear you say that Mr. Stick. I'm glad you know when you're hit. Them pictchures never insulted me—nor no uther farmer in this stait. An’ the reezon thay in- sulted you an’ a few uther men uv your stripe iz becauze thay told the truth— thay described you exactly, they pictchured you correctly. Every pict- chure that man has maid in the Leeder haz bin a sermon—a sermon chock full uv gospel truth. Thats the reezon I say he will be a good representative uv the farmers in Congress—he knows exactly the farmers’ needs an’ he knows the remedies fur ’em. Why ef he didn't do nuthin’ but go down to Washington and maik pictchures— pictchures that tell how the uther Congressmen act—how thay dodge the issues, how they duck the propositi=- shuns an’ how thay serve big bizness, I say ef he didn’t do no more than that ne will have served the peeple uv this stait better than enny man you an’ your kind wud put up.” Stick slowed down a minnit to adjust his carberator which seamed to bhe gettin’ too much gasoline, an’ while he wuz doin’ that the banker butted in. “But he’'s a, Demmicrat an’ you're a Republican—how can you vote fur him?” NOT PARTY MAN - BUT NONPARTISAN “No he aint no Demmicrat an’ I haint no Republican. He's a Nonpar- tisan an’ so am I a Nonpartisan. May- be he used to be a Demmicrat—but what do I care fur that now. Or he may have bin a Socialist fur all I know —but I don’t care fur that, az long az he’s a Nonpartican now. You're at the saim ole tricks you an’ your kind have always bin at—tryin’ to divide us farmers up—adivide us up into Repub- licans, Demmicrats, Socialists an’ what nots. But you can’t do it enny more. ‘We're onto that ole trick. We're wize to that skeem. 7You can fool sum uv us all the time and all uv us sum uv the time but you caint fool ALL uv us ALL uv the time an’ I'm wun uv ’em , “an’ this iz wun uv the times—an’ the next time Slick.” Considerable uv a crowd had col- lected az a result uv the argymint an’ in az much as Stick wuz gittin the best uv it Mr, Slick wuz gittin’ a lit- tle embarrassed. “O well, ef he suits you fellers,” he sed, sorter opologetically, “I spoze I can put up with him. “You durn rite you can put up with him,” cum back Stick, pintin’ a long finger at the banker. “You mity dum rite youwll put up with him. We’ve bin puttin’ up with the kind uv men you’ve picked out fur the past twenty-five yeers an’ now its your turn to set back an’ let us pick ’em out fur awhile.” The banker ’lowed he had to go un’ went. A duzzen uther farmers that had collected around cum up an’ be- gin to congratulate Stick an’ say, “Them’s our sentiments, by heck, them’s our sentiments.” Yours Trooly, ‘Il ke anuther time, Mr, RIP. WHY NOT DRAFT MONEY? An idea suggested to us in'a conver- sation with a gentleman from out-of- town: ‘“Why should not our great nation be empowered to draft the use of money as well as the services in the army of the young men to act as soldiers?” Why not? When the-gov- ernment drafts men to serve in the army and navy does it not select those who are young and strong and of an age to best withstand the hardships of war? Then in seeking to raise money to carry on the war should it not go to those who have millions of dollars and who could easily give the money without feeling its loss rather than to those who have to work hard for every “bit” they get and are really in need of every cent they earn?— ASHBY (MINN.) POST. G