Grand Rapids Herald-Review Newspaper, April 8, 1905, Page 8

Published Every Saturday. By E. C. KILEY. TKI DOLLARS A YEAR IN ADVANCE . Ratered in the Postoflice at Grand Rapid Minnesota, 28 Second-Cluas Matter, HAD BETTER KEPT THE FEE. Mayor’s Generous Deed the Cause of a Lot of Trouble. A young cauple who desired to sur round their nuptials with additionai glamor were married in the mayors office a few days ago. After the mayor had pronouneed the benedie-~ tion the happy groom passed over a brand-new five-dollar ‘note as a fee. His honor gracefully transferred the note to the bride with the suggestion that it be apptied to the start in housekeeping. The couple departed in such a blissful mood that -the mayor was all smiles as he resumed his‘duties. Yesterday the bride called wearing a gloomy air. “What’s the trouble?” asked the mayer, who re membered her, “I wish you had taken that $5. Before we were out of the eity hall my husband wanted it baek. T wouldn't give it to him, and we fought over it until now we're sepa- rated. If anybody else comes along to be married and offers you money, take it. Maybe it will save trouble afterward.”—Philadelphia Record. STARTING RUNS ON BANKS, Small Incidents Serve to Alarm De- positors—Ruse of Bank of England. A queer run on the savings bank in the Ghetto district of New York city has recalled others of the same sort. Here is one: A good many years ago in London an old woman fell in front of a bank and broke her leg. A crowd gathered and the report got about that there was a run on the bank. Im a very brief space there really was one. A disastrous run on the Bank of Ergland in the time of the Pretender in the eighteenth cen- tury was prevented by an ingenious delay. When Prince Charles was marching on London depositors were in a frantic hurry to draw out all they had in the Bank of England. Every call was met, but in sixpences and shillings. So long did these coins take to count and se prodigious were the loads of bullion which had to be ear ried that public eonfidenee was re stored, and news of the retreat of the highlanders coming te town, the situa- tion was saved. Song. You that pave seen how the world and ad grow old Mke tho love of a have come to the end of the were tired ere you came to ‘i the end; You th: re weary of laughter and sor- re Pain and pleasure. labor and sin. Sick of the midnight and dreading the morrow Ah, come in; come in, You t are bearing the load of the have loved overmuch and too confute all the saws of the your werk was a wasted en- deavor; You that have lost and yet faecenatie therein, Add less to your losses and triumph for- ever; Ah. come in: come tn. ~—Blackwood’s Magazine, LITERAL IN HIS OBEDIENCE. Scotch Servant Should Have Made an Ideal Soidier. Scottish highland retainers, when made to do duty as servants, are said to show a very stolid, matter-of-fact kind of obedience. A Mr. Campbell, a highland gentleman, visiting a coun- try house, told Donald to bring every- thing out of the bedroom, meaning his personal belongings, But five minutes later he found alt its. movable articles —fender, fire-irons and the like—piled up in the lobby, so literal was the poor man’s sense of obedience to orders! And of this he gave a still more ex: traordinary proof during bis sojourn in Edinburgh. When the family moved into a house there Mrs. Camp: bell gave him very particular instruc- tions regarding visitors, explaining they were to be shown into the draw- Ing room, and used the Scottteism, “Carry any ladies that call upstairs.” The first visitors were two women who came at the same time. Donald seized one in his arms, said to the other, “Bide ye there till I come for ye,” and in spite of her struggles atid remonstrances ushered the terrified visitor into Mrs. Campbell’s presente THE PIONEER -OF- MENAGERIES. George Wombwell, the First to En- gace in Profitable Business. George Wombwell, who was to may2 his name world known as a m¢uagerie proprietor, was a cobbler in Monmouth street, Soho, London, be- fore he made his adventure into the world of zoology. His initial purchase was a curious one for a stiteher of leather—two Loaconstrictors; $875 they cost him, but the soundness of his investment wes proved by the fact that he clea his expenses in the first few weeks of ownership by ex- hibiting them. Thus _ prosperously launched, he built up the finest travel- ing menagerie’ ever seen up to that time in England. His family of carni- vora multiplied exceedingly in captiv- ity, bis caravaps numbered forty and his expenses were $500 a day, &nd it took 120 Clydesdales to move him from fair to fair, | Guardian’ of Infernal’ Regions Very Like Human Beings. The dog fancier, having approached the portals: of the infernal, regions, stopped ta admire their famous canine guardian. “Fine dogt” he said. “Bully dag! If two heads are better than ane, what about a hundred? Bet he’d have tak- en @ blue ribbon at a dog show.” Whereupon Cerberus wagged his tail enthusiastically. “Fine tail! Magnificent tail! But it cant wag this dog! Some people told me he was built out of proportion in the matter of heads—ought to have yieg> and tails ta match. But I think he’s fust right.” Ceiberus emitted a hundred simul- tanecus deep, low growls of satisfac- tion; et least one seemed to come rom every head. Then he stretehed out each of his heads in succession to he patted and finally held sh his paw to shake hands. # The dog fancier passed on. “Stupid brute!” he said. “He’d rath- er have flattery than a bone. But I’ve seen lots of men who are _uilt just the same way.” DISTINCT VALUE OF POISE. Means Collecting and Balancing of the Vital Forces, Poise must nat be confounded with pose. It is not an attitude or an af- fectation, as so many women seem to think in disregarding it, says Har- per’s Bazar. It is really a prepara- tion. The arrow is poised for flight. Otherwise it cannot be aimed to the mark. Poise saves a2 woman from wasting energy in unaimed effort. The eleverer, the more energetie, a woman is, the more she needs correct poise. And few women are born ‘with it. while many have yet the alphabet of it te learn when they come of age. The exclamation point, in conversa- tion or life, betrays emotional lack of balance and waste of energy. Poise reserves itself for the right occasion, and emphasizes important things with- out need of exclamation. In other words, it saves its awner from unnec- essary words or acts, and prepares her for necessary ones. Unless one have an aim in life, poise is never really at- tained. It is not mere repose. It is the collecting and balancing ef one’s forces. Seeking the Large Life. The habit which many women have formed and from which they apparent- ly de noi attempt to secure freedom, of devoting whe larger portion of their time. and thoughts to the trivial things of life, robs them of the capac- ity of enjoying or assimilating much which would add to intellectual growth, says a writer in Maaam. The woman who sees nothing from day to day but the four walls of her abiding place often quite naturally becomes narrow in her thoughts. She even lacks the incentive to commune with great minds through reading. But in- terest in that which best serves hu- manity should not be limited by the Nnes of sex. As woa:an’s opportuni- ties open she is quick to place herself in touch with all the active forces which make‘ for the betterment cf mankind. Origin of the “Cocktail.” There has been much curiosity as to the origin of the name “cocktail.” At last seme one has come fj» -vard with an answer to this question waich may be pure invention or truth, but at any rate sounds plausible. In. the early @ays, when doctors used stren- uous methods and medicines in the cure of disease, there was a habit among them of treating certain dis- eases of the throat with a pleasant liquid, which was applied by the tip of a long feather plucked from a coek’s tail. In course of time this remedy came to be used as a gargle, | still retaining its cld name. In the course of its evolution the gargle gained most of the present ingredi- ents—spirits, sugar, bitters and so on —till it became the beverage of to- day. The Beauty of Repose. Sitting and rising may be motions | ef ease and grace or suggest the ma- neuvers of a seal. To fall into a seat with a thump and spill all over it is not pretty, nor is it necessary. The woman who takes a seat in this way elutches wildly at anything in reach whez she attempts to rise, and strug- gies awkwardly to her feet. Controt of the muscles wil! prevent all this, and the heaviest woman may get up and down with some degree of grace and ease with a little care and prac tiee. Boy Weather. It's boy-time when it freezes, ‘ It’s boy-time when it snows; ‘The youngster is the ong whose lot Is happiest when it snows. It’s rough on rheumatism, And it seriously annoys ‘The dignity of grown folks, But it’s pretty good for boys. It's just another instance, When nature makes it plain, That in the mighty scheme Of things There’s nothing made in vain. So let’s forget our sorrows, In a fellow-being's joys, The weather's hard on grown folks, But it’s prey good for boys. Washington Evening Star. Bony Ornaments. A farmer near Sunderland, Eng: land, has erected a gateway, the front entrance to his yard, which is com- posed of bones of various kinds, all of which belonged to favorite animals of his stock. His fondness for these relics is evidenced in other parts of his dwelling, the name on the front of the residential portion being mark- ed out with knuckle-bones; pairs of white horns and silver-meunted hoofs are the chief ornaments:in uM eee eat Vaciation in Calor of - cious Metal. — Few people knaw the real color of gold, because it 18 seldom seen. except: when heavily alldyed, which makes it much redder than when it is pure. The purest.coins ever made were the fitty-dollar pieces which once were in common use in Calitornia. . Their coinage was abandoned ‘or twa reasons: by abrasion was so great, ard second, because their interior could be bored out and filled with lead. The differ- ence in weight was so small that it could not be noticed in such large pieces. They were octagonal in shape and were the most valuable coins ever minted and’ circulated. . All gold is not alike wren refined. Australian gold is distinctly redder ‘than that taken in California. More- ‘over, placer gold is mcre yellow than that which is taken from quartz. This is one of the mysteries of metallurgy, because the gold in placers comes from that which is in quartz. Gold taken from different placers will vary in color. The gold in the Ural moun- tains is the reddest in the world— The Sunday Magazine. MASTER OF MANY TRADES. Louisville. Man Shouldn’t Be Very Long Cut of a Job. The thriftiest man in the United States lives in Louisville. He has trades that fit any climate, season or time of the day. As an example of his wonderful versatility, a friend tells the following story of an average day in the life of this strenuous man. One morning last week he started eut with a rug to sell on commission for an installment house. He sold the rug, and then came back and took out a clock, whieh he also disposed of. About noon he was called by an under- taker to embalm a body, which he did. Another undertaker sent for him to drive a hearse to the cemetery, and after he had disposed of this errand satisfactorily he preached a short ser- mon at the grave. He drove the hearse back to town and filled in an afternaon for a candy- maker who was taken suddenly ill. In the evenirg he worked from 6 till 8 o’clock in a barber shop, and from that hour until midnight set type an a daily newspaper. Admired the Judge’s Language. In the days when dentistry was not the science it is now the pounding of a hickory plug into the space between! the teeth taking the place of modern who was noted fer his pieturesque flow of profanity, visited a dentist. The work had hardly started when the judge began to swear, ‘When the in force his language became torrid and when, in time, the dentist’ gave the final blows the patient arose from the chair and fairly shattered the etmosphere with a weird, terrible tor- rent ef profanity. As the judge passed out the dentist remarked to a waiting patient: “Wasn't it beauti- ful? It wasn’t really necessary to pound half so long, but I di@ so en- joy his inflection that I almost pound- ed the hickory plug into splinters. Wonderful command of language the judge has!” Proof That Degs Can Think. The following facts, which I saw with my own eyes on repeated occa- thcught. I once had a_ three-parts .bred black and tan terrier, which, slept in a basket in my bedroom, that opened into the nursery. One of my children was, from ill health, very fractious, and whenever Tiny heard it cry she would go into the nursery, | hunt about until she found a squeak- ing rag doll, take it to the side of the cot and sitting up, shake it to amuse the child. If in coing this she did not display powers of memory, thought and reflection, I utterly fail to see to what her clever performance eould be attributed—Correspondence in London Globe. Truth Profaundly Expressed. The profound truth that to-morrow never comes, and yesterday, although it is always passing, has never been with us, has Ied a correspondent to throw off this little effort: “Although yesterday to-day was to-morrow, and te-morrow to-day will be yesterday, nevertheless yesterday to-morrow would be the day after to-morrow, be- cause to-day would be to-morrow yes- terday, and to-morrow will be to-day to-morrow, or would have been the day after to-morrow yesterday.” We thought as much.—London Answers. Regret. It’s lonesome whar de shadows fall ’ Across de ‘drifted snow. It_doesn’t seem de place at all Dat once I used to know. Dem frien’s I had in days gone by, Whah is dey keepin’ hid? I misses Mistah Butterfly An’ o! Miss Katydid. It’s kind o° sad when life grows cold An’ toilsome an’ severe, To think about Chat times of old So far amey f'um here. Dey seemed so wuthless as dey'd fiy, De flowers an’ stars amiga. | 9 “gu now I miss dat Spenray ol’ Miss Katydid. Atvashington Star, Experimental’ Expenses, When I asked a young man how much his employer's stockroom Tepre- sented in the way of losses, he esti- mated that it would take a million dollars to cover them, but during this million dollar period his _ employer made four million dollars, co that everything went on cheerfully. Those ‘who make money are not afraid of a reasonable amount of experimental eenense eet M. Pratt. first, because the loss | ‘er a temporary light in the form of a bridgework, the elder Judge Peckham, | tapping of the hickory plug increased { sions, fully convinced me that ani- | mals have the powers of memory and ! | i | | ‘Verdict of Coroner's Jury*en Body of | toe sensitive. | animals are also his. j Stay, Wrecked Sailor. » Records of the ancient city Gorge ana, founded in 1640, better known at ‘the present time-as York Harbor, Me, contain many quaint and unusual sto ries of the early life of the town. At the entrance te York Harbor a bold promontory known as Stage Neck extends some distance into the sea, from which formerly in ctormy weath- lantern hoisted upon an upright pole was displayed as a warning to mari ners. One dark winter night 2 sloop was wrecked om these rocks. A survivor, on being questioned about the catas- trophe. said: “The vessel struck, turned aver on her side, and the skipper and another barrel of whiskey relled overboard.” , The local coroner was summoned, and this somewhat, startling verdict was returned: “We find that the deceased fell from the masthead and was killed; he roll- ed overboard and was drowned; he floated ashore and froze to death and the rats eat him up alive!’—Harper’s Weekly. é GOCD ADVICE FOR ALL. Cultivate Calmness if You Health and Happiness. A beautiful woman gave the follow- ing advice to a girl admirer: “Shicid your nerves and dan’t let them become Make yourself take life calmly. If yeu lose 2 train don't pace the platform wildly, but inquire when the next comes in, and sit down calm- ly to wait for it. That’s just what Wish * { most women don’t de; they sit down, perhaps, but they tap the fleor with their feet, clinch and unelinch their hands, and are apparently in a fever heat of exeitement over the arrival of every train that comes in, even though they have been assured that theirs is nat due for another half hour. That half hour of waiting means to them a frightful wear and tear of nerves and they are practically weeks older for it. Try to cultivate calmness, but, if you cannot do that all at once, xe { ean keep your face still.” “Dég Trot” a Misnomer. “Dogs have a variety of gaits,” the boss of the kennels, “therefore | can’t understand why it is that peo- ple who describe a certain style of locomotion always call it 2 dog trot. said | Judging by the universality of that expression, @ body would think that #2 dog never moves any other way than on a trot. But he does. Al the gaits belonging to other four-fcoted He runs, he lepes, he even racks and paces, so when a person in a hurry falls into a peculiar kind of canter, there would be just as much sense in speaking of his gait as a dog run‘or a dog gal. lop; once in a while, as atways to call | it a dog trot.” ‘ Forest of Dwarf Trees. The most extraardinary forest in the world is’ ene discovered by Dr. Welwitsch, whieh oecupies a table- land some six miles broad, at a height of 200 feet or 400 feet above the sea, near the West Ccast of Africa. The trunks of the trees.of this peculiar forest are 4 feet in diameter, and yet they only attain a height of 1 foot, giving the tree the appearance of a round table. There are never more than two leaves, which attain a length of 6 feet and a breadth of 2 feet, the flowers forming crimson clusters. Stay, Stay at Home. stay at home, my heart. and rest; Home-keeping hearts are.happiest; lor those whe wander they know not where Are iull of trouble and full of care; To stay at Rome is Lest. Weary and homesick and distressed. ‘hey wander east, they wander west, And are baffled and beaten and blown about + By the winds of the wilderness of doubt; To stay at home is best. Then stay at home, my heart. and rest; ‘The bird is safest in its nest; O'er all that flutter their wings and fly A hawk is hovering in the sky; To stay at home is ‘best. —Longfellow. Rest for the Bedridden. In cases where absolute rest of the body is necessary, and the patient gets very weary of lying still, a most welcome rest and change to the limbs ‘can be managed by the nurse raising the knees of the patient well up in bed, and then putting a good, substan- | tial pillow or bolster well packed un- derneath them. In time, of course, the patient wearies of this position, then the support should be with- drawn, and fresh relief is afforded. This would also give great comfort to people partly paralyzed. « Happiness a Great Force. A happy man or woman is a better thing to find than a £5 note, writes Stevenson. He or she is ea radiating force of good will, and their entrance into a room as though another candle had been lighted. We need not care whether they could prove the forty- seventh proposition. They do a bet- ter thing than that. They practically demonstrate the great theorism of the liveableness of life. SE EEE A French Custom. In France a newly married couple. @o not have the ordinary. bridal calls made upon them. Instead, garbed in their best, the bride and groom pay visits to all their married friends. Imagine a shy woman’s embarrass- ment when she must call upon total strangers—especially if she marries away from her own neighborhood, or por husband has a country house in a different carter. needs no technical knowledge 5 to be charmed by the tone of o Baldwin The crowded houses that received De Pachmann every- where on his recent tone-triumph tour is ample evidence of this. Geo. F. Kremer FURNITURE ets, Rugs and all Paper, etc. Ca Grand Prix, Paris, 1949. The Grand Prize, St. Louis, 1984. eDe Pachmann uses the Baldwin piano exclusively. SAY, PA, WHY ‘DON’T YOU WEAR THE MENOMINEE | SEAMLESS? / Senstbie boy. that. He made We make shoes which put the corn- a bull’s eye when he spoke. cure dealers on theranxious seat. eae ae We cure corns by fitting the feet scientifically. way to eure corns is to prevent i tieir growth in the first place. j 4 the Menomince Sear-'ess | Union Made Shoe 1s ex y-to- | * wear, easy-to-buy, easy-to-scll, fll For Sate Ry i fe {p55 1. §. KURTZHAN, nee — The best The Shoe Man GUARANTEED TO GUTWEAR Grand Rapids - Minnesota’ ANY SHOE ON THE MARKET. SESLSLSWLSLSLSWSVS PS VEYSLSLSMSe Sr aves Erase aver |} BLSVHWSOST SM FELE? Ses SIMSISSE’ S2 eter: ) a. ; SWSVSWSVANSLSL SLES. SVSVSTSVG IOV Pioneer Meat Market, THOMAS FINNEGAN, Prop. Fresh and | ‘Fish, Game j Salt Meats— Poultry. ete. B8SS63 ASK ANY OF OUR REGULAR ¢ WILL TELL YOU THAT SHE VEI 4 Steak” * ARE KEPT At THE eo" AT: rlONEER M ; Butter, Eges, Cheese and Canned Goods oe FELLOWS’ BUILDING, LELAND AVENUE., GRAND RAPIDS. SLPGECISL SS % SISLSWSVSWSOVSPSOSLS> SWGVHOSISFSLSLSLSL FSLSLSISLVED sees Manufactured at rand Rupids by & CO, tial and building ver placed on market, Lan Fuilding Blocks: J F. FREESTONE et The most substan- ecomic meteria the For the erection of Business and Residence Buildings, Sidwalks, Ormamenal! Fencing, Chim- neys, Ete. A ; z : i x : for refreshments and where may be seen avd heard one of the largest phonographs in the world is at JOHN O’RILEY’S Sample Room The Northern. a most delightful beverage alw Cabinet Rye Whiskey ici we aie Agent for itn Grand Rapids. We handle the finest whiskeys ever distilled. Chef. NORTHERN CAFE Peer Mes Cie In connection—open day and night. served at ull hours. gg JOHN O’RILEY,Prop. All delicacies of the season greees AB Ab ee Hee at Mt ae Fh eas wk A ae ae a ea a ah a aE De Ld dd hhh bch ddeded db icdob:todddcbcdcdek dcobcaba edd dd ok dchechcab-ebsebschcohcobccbosbsch seibockcohechcstood sapeaceseeee ESE Ea aE ae ae ah eae ae ae AE A ETE EEE A ETT AERA SREB HA gece A Favorite Resort BERERE | HE Ree SR GT a HENGPSPOTCASSSGHSSRT | SESpSeGsagagsn sesaegegesag