Grand Rapids Herald-Review Newspaper, April 11, 1903, Page 4

‘drousers feels sorry 1® Grant fRavts Wrerat- Review! y Publisned Every Saturday By E. C KILEY. ye on IN AD iid DOLLAKS A in the Postottice at Grand Rapids wotergd tn tne Second-Class datter ‘WITH -THE SAGES: Liberality consists rather. in giving seasonably than much.—Cicero. People seldom improve when they have no model but themselves to copy | atter.—Goldsmith. Nobleness of character is nothing else but steady love of good and steady scorn of evil.—Epictetus, . Our character is but the stamp on cur souls of the free choices of good and evil we have made through life.— Geikie. o le who will not give some portion of his ease, his blood, his wealth, for others’ gcod, is a poor frozen churl.— Joanna Baillie. That alone can be called true refine- | ment which elevates the soul of man, | ¢ the manners by improving | tellect.—Coleridge. Re mber that life is neither pain | or pleasure; it is serious business, to | be entered upon with courage and in it of se!’ sacrifice-——-De Tocque- No true man ean live a half life vhen he has genuinely learned at it s only a helf life. The other half— the higher half—must haunt him.— Pillips Brooks. ife is‘no idle dream, but a solemn ¥, based on and encompassed by Find out your work, and stand to it; the night cometh when no man can work.—Carlyle. Tho ts of virtue lead to virtuous | aetion its; and the goodly and perma sult i of a virtuous character.—Chalmers. -Experience serves to prove that the worth and strength of a state depend far less upon the form of its institu- tio than upon the character of its men; for the nation is only the aggre- gate of the individua! conditions, and @ivilization itself is but a question of personal improvement. — Samuel Smiles. ent Te- SOME POST The word “pen” and is from the Latin penna, a wing. Tortoise shell, however old, can be kept bright by polishing it occasionally with rouge pow It is claimed that you can nails into hard wood without bending them if you-dip them first in lard. German farms occupy nearly 1,000,- 000 acres in Central America on which 20,000,000 coffee trees are planted. A dollar loaned for a hundred years over 2 and compounded at 24 per cent will, ‘ amount in that time to $2,551,.799,404. The oldest statue of the world is of the sheik of an Egyptian village. It is believed to be*not less thaa 6,000 years old. Steam power bility in Southe: fuel being one of the most expensive Chinese luxuries. The assessed valu the State of the board of equalizat 308,070. Rey. Dr. W. D. P: Ind., has officiated at 105 chureh dedi- cations, ich is thought to be the world’s 1 At Plini est camelia in old, about fif 900 blossoms of real ests ar Dresden, is the lz irope. itis 160 years and has 40,- ALL SORTS. An early cro 5-cent cigars you get at Phe cight-day clock is a hard worker cand a chy vonie striker. Sometim, s it i imerease a Much of the .“? home is too fee Any small bo mother, The skin-deep bea at rhin: “aceros isn’t calculated toh 9°Sh° him n. When it cofiiés io a questton ‘of Sta. ing qualities the dndertaker dan sayy the pugilist out. If it is true that the gved die‘ young , it is up to the oldest inhabitant to} effer an explanation. A cynic is a man whose disappoint- ment is due to the was made without his advice. It sometimes pens that a man | puts both money and confid e ina| and later draws out his conf | ve Karsas man boasts of running the | only strictly third-class hotel: in the | country. It is np to other landlords incignantly to deny this assertion. CeREFULLY THOUGHT OUT. He who gains friend. One must suffer in order to tolerate the sufferings of others. The manager of an opera company is juct Jin puct on airs. A cat has nine lives—and at least eight of them are devoted to vocal culture. {Consider the man who is always on time—and the time he wastes in wait- | ing for other men. Am frier will net forget him as long as he owes them money. time gains a good acts of virtue ripen into hab- \ the formation cr establishment | means a feather, | g drive of Kokomo, | net that the world | 7 may be reasonably sure his | DEFECTIVE PAGE. “WER UGLY WHER ‘DRUNK. — Qualification Not ‘Absolutely Eseential to a Minister. A preacher in Topeka, Kan., tolls this story relative to another member of “the cloth,” and inferentially the tale must be true: “A church at Anadarko was consid- ering the merits of a pastor who had applied fur the pastorate. The deac- ons had been told that a Jawyer of the town had known the pastor intimate- ly. They went to him and asked for a statement of the qualifications of | the candidate. ‘Yes, | know Brother very weil,’ said the lawyer. ‘I went. to college with him, and I at- tended his. church after he entered the ministry.’ He is scholarly, able and eloquent and I am sure you will like him.’ Tho deacons thanked the lawyer and were going away when he called to them in consequence of an afterthought, ‘I ‘don't know as it makes any difference,’ said he apolo- | getically, ‘but perhaps I should tell) j you that he’s as ugly as h—I when | | he’s drunk A LITTLE TOO PREVIOUS. ! | ast dhs Parting Shot at the Professor Was Il!-Timed. | In a public school in the northwest section it is the custom for the super- | vising principal to receive “Good | morning” and “Good afternoon” from the pupils on entering and leaving the schoo}. It was rather repulsive for one boy, who evaded the custem as often, as possible. One Friday after- noon he saluted the principal with the startling farewell, “Go to the dev- il, professor,” and ran out of the | school. The professor became very: angry over the aff and thought over several plans of punishment to | mete out on the following Monday ' morning. Monday morning came, and ' with it the boy, who sat on a bench’: outside the class‘ room. When the professor appeared, he began to cry, pang: loudly explained: “Oh, profess- 1 or » don't expel me; we were going to | move’ away from here on Friday, and | now we ain't.” It is needless to say he was not expelled.— Philadelphia | Ledger. i | ! Modern Scarecrows. | So many cases of troublesome short circuiting of electric wires have oc- | owls, recently by crows, eagles, etc., li curred t of putting scare- The | electrical have found ways to head off most of the technical trou- s of electric mition, but these pranks of ani i to prevent. Wier a bridg | wires it ' curre > | for the dan { a bird or cat makes sn two highly charged | tantly eremated by the his is smail satisfaction © e and scare at the cen- ibis: sudden shert cir- tral station t uit causes. i ‘ Certainly Not. | | When you see oung man sitting | linac om with the ugliest 4-| | | | year-cld boy that ever frightened him- | self in an r clambering over his | jerkir necktie out of | ruffiin rt-front, pulling , feeling in coppers, while the miles all the time omic paper, you , that the howling boy | has a er who is in a room not twenty feet away, and that the young man doesn’t come there just for the fun of playing with her brother. his s Ean) en of Kokomo, ious turn, e wnregen- | erate. John an- | nounced at that oment t for his ecnveni r hands were “in already on his but he arose and thrashed his icus spouse, after. which he scncluded his devotional ¢ with all due reyerence. Mrs. Newdiek him up before a magistrate next rT and nis-excess of zeal cost knees y ot R Cause for Alarm, i -o J. N. Fitzsimmens of | ' the New Yo city court told a good story recertiy of his experiences in! rs many years ago. They ! Ohiet Just | the { we hing bard fora “strike,” and he bol at and day, ard, as the! even e cold, a fire was built. ; in was struck from | hed to a height of | , and a stream of, ir, The foreman, , ed to tie deor with | get up, Fitzsimmons. | rongh into hell.” One whieh over a hi hun! ed fee “did you hear that lecture in wh stated that the fact that Adam } ore Eve indicated i earth. arri that sume | prec e over cmewhat icy “Ign't | i 1 tt aba 2 lt simply shows that Adam { ; was ex to get the garden in ! shane f s comfort, just as the | | modern tsoup in the morning | lana lr —Washington | | Star. . | Better Thar ioc bk ssing the | matinee day, ! | out. “What is : | “play bad?” ocomotive. y of Music one | uiter,” I asked; he replied, “but it} | is too hot in tr : the house is liter: | | ally packed wits women, You see, it’s the name—Ninety and Nine’—that eatches them. They fancy that the | admission has been marked down from « doNar and can’t resist the bar- gain.”—New “= ‘Times. Nel D tod Writer ‘Says ‘the World Is Mad on the Subject. The world is gone mad on strength and shape, says “Tip” in tic New York Press. Magazines ar © sspa- pers are alive with adverii-: ats of methods of acguirirg the wuscie of | Hercules, the arms of Venus, the neck of Juno, the bust of Vesta, the waist ‘of Josephine, the hips of Diana, the legs of Cleopatra. Minerva is for the moment in the background. No hope for wisdom now! ‘Women are dis- played in impossible positions and ad- vised to repeat certain poses. Mrs. Cutex asked Mrs. Butex, “How do you keep your front so flat, my dear?” Mrs. Butex replied: “Oh, I am under instructions. Thirty times in the morning and thirty times in the even- ing I pick up each foot in my hands and touch the tco to the tip of my ear. You can have no idea how much it has reduced my front, certainly several inches ard sume pounds.” “Do you stand up end do that? “Necessarily; stand on one foot while the other is in the air.’ “Merciful heavens!" 4 AGREED ON THEIR VER Jurymen Had Ma de Up Their Minds, and So Affirnved. 2DICT. aj t court. returned ay accused pers verdict had ngt the tech: nical form €22i. ec 'p sent the y back to ma correct: The } half an h brought in a the prisoner. But even more 1 amu y at Pitts’ B. nal one, and after a minutes’ consul. tation the into the box from its recn verdict respond } over. “Th? cl -judge. Andt jury, agree to disa: Worn Only Twice. The Scandinavian bridegroom pre sents to his hetrota2ed a prayer-book and many other ¢ifts, which usually | goose. ohe, in turn, gives | y in Sweden, a-shirt, and | wears on his wed ding day. Atterwards -he puts it away, and in no circumstances will he wear it again while alive. But he wears it in his grave, and there are Swedes who earnestly belicye not only ine the sonia Gets ot the body, but in the the betrothal as have never marriage vows. widower must destroy cond marriage the shirts of such husbands broken ar The Swe on the eve o. his bridal shirt wh him. Couldn't Be Very Sure. The recent St. cording to the Wesiminster Gazette, have been noteworthy for the profu- sion cf Scotch stories. which in sev- eral cases fairly set the tables in a roar. Some of them have an ancient Ting."but there is » that is perhaps Not venerally kno A dactor was attendi a danger Scotch butler wa in the forenoon he to Donald: hope your master’s temperature is much lower to-day than it was last ‘I'm no’ sae very sure aboot ’ replied the butler, “for he dee’d morning.” Worth Watching. A treasury official was fortunate encrgh the other y to get half a ton of coz!. The precious fuel was depo {ted on sidewalk late in the afte pocn and a colored man agreed to put it away for a quarter, When he lad firished the job the man presented a | 3 “Why, I thought you said a quarter,” said the officeholder. :“A quarter for putting it in, but 10 cents extra to pay a man to watch it. You see, if some one had taken a cou- ple ¢ andfuls you would have lost at least half a dollar.” —New World. bill for cents, The Sleepy Hour of Night. A hea collision between twe sai eight trains on the Southern Pacific in Ca ia was due to the carejess- the engincer of one of the trains, who slept at his post and paid the forfeit with his life. Manager Al- ger of the Southern Pacific says that ; the company has great trouble on ac- count a men succumbing to sleep be- tween 3 and 4 in the morning. This s the time at which the accident urred. It Is the sleepy hour that affects men more than any other of the day or night. \ How to Achieve S ccess. Often we see bright boys who have | on small | worked, perhaps for. years, salaries, suddenly jumping, as if by c, into high and responsible posi- 3 Simply becau: while their empleyers were paying m but | a few gollars a. week, they were pay- ing themselves vastly mere in the fine quality of their work, in the asm, determination and high they brought to their ta increased insight into b and in ness meth- i ods.—Success. A Puzzled Youngster. “Mamma,” said a little boy, “when end .coming | were George Washington and England smarried?” “Why, Lawrence,” an- swered the mother, “what do you mean? Washington was a man and England is a country. ‘They could not | be married, my dear.” “Then,” replied the youthful philosopher, “I don’t see’) why they call Washington the Father — of hig Country and England the Moth. er Country, if they were not married.” .) We other day * his first wife gave | i Andrew's dinners, ac- | old indeed—who was addicted to par- York | enthusi- . purpose 4) j) oo Millionaire Gives Five Mil- -s to Relieve Sufferers. i °e \ areckjee Wadia, C. 1. E., ee millionaire of Bombay, set doa sum of money equiva- e{ (0 95,0 0,000, the interest of ich is to be devoted to give relief { these who find themselves sud- | “culy deprived ef means of subsistence | great calamities, such as fire, fam- te or earthquake. In order that his H charity should be far reaching in its efleets, the scope of the trust will not | > confined to one place or country, | but will pe extended to all parts of the | wcerld. Mr. Wadia belongs to an an | cient Pars-> family of shipwrights, who have, during the course of a cen- tury and a half, built 356 taen/ot-war | ard other vessels. The Wadias ren-| dered great service to the French gov-! | ernment, and as an act of recognition ; Napolcon Bonaparte presented the; great-grandfather of the present Mr. | Wadia with the Legion of Honor, and; ‘his grandfather was awarded a gold | | medal by Louis Philippe. Mr. Wadia | has given away large sums of money | i in charity, and lately headed the Bom- | | bay Martinique Relief Fund with a | large donaci WAS THE DEACON’S TURN. | Drunkard’s Advice to Pillar of a Phil- adelphia Church. | A drunken man staggered into a ehurch in Ph adelphia some years ago and sat in the pew of one ‘of | The preacher was dis- prevalent popular | exciaimed. ‘Where is ‘The drunken man was ; ! just far crouch gone to think the call ; Personal, so, rising heavi replied: “Here 1 ain,” and remained standing Suits and Overcoat 1 have the gourds that will please you, styles ¢ that are supe rb, andthav’s all Pneed announce yg =the hundreds of suits worn in Grand © » Rapids to-day attest to my skill'as a ‘Fi of Man.” Call and see Johnson, The Tailor, Ieee Prices are Always Right. SPGSPSLS PVH VGVE BLOL FS SLSCKP SD I Hotel Gladstone E. WILDER,© Prop: FIRST-CLASS IN EVERY RESPECT. Sample Room and Livers in Connection Atte Tleadguarters for Lunbermen. fion Grtven to Transient Trae. Spectal 23) | Wee the drunkard’s character and | e were eloquently portr: A few j ' minutes Iater the preach ned an- other hea? ci his discourse, and asked: is the hb Gently s his neighh< drunkard an audible whi “Stand ‘up, d Stand 1 as. I ste on; he means yeu this time. and take it like a man, just Tt will do good.” f ~The Invincible Country Boy. A glance at a list of the great men | of the big cities of the United States | will prove beyond a doubi that the country-bred boy far superior to | his city-born cousin in point of busi- | ness and professional abili and gen- ‘ eral capaci are ad- vanced for the success of the country | boy in the large cities, but the one | that see il on the head to hit the a is that th igster of the provinces is taught to meant | a good. her one of twelve hour sticker, too, who is w to start in at the bot- tom, and when you find a country boy who is a worker and a sticker he is invincible. You can’t keep him down. | —Salt Lake Telegram, ! A Test of Faith. “Now, breti aid the conserva- tive, “I want to cory you that your what you call } r criticism is wrong, and that the onl y to do is to take the Bible as iple act of faith. I have answ your arguments, a1 fairly, why sho’ uld: 2 ie Tedo?s Do. opponent, with soler terally be- lieve, that the whale was swallowed by Jonah?” “Of course I do! plied the conservative, cagerly. “Well,” the other observed, over his shoulder, “I am afraid you will never convince me of that. Good. night.”—Washington Times. believe as Uekedbedanaconeheddednncenencapiaoon. | EA SE ae eG AE EAE Ee at ah A a ee eM ae eH Ee ae eH a a EE a8 EE a oe EE SEE A ae A AE ae EE Rae ae eS ae a Se Animal Food. According to a contemporary an old Scotsman—and he must be now very simony, was found by a visitor to be manifestly suffering from want of food. He was strongly urged to take some animal food, and promised .that he i would; but presently thought better | of it and thus delivered his final ver- | i dict: “Weel,” he said, “I’m willing | to try a turnip or maybees an onion, t but I'm blest if Tl eat straw.” The ! decision showed which way the wind | blew: with him.—London Globe. Not a Protest. Representative Mudd o. Maryland has frequently been in conflict with j the other members of his delegation | over the question of patrona: “At Jast I have succeeded in placing two men without receiving protes from | every other member of the delega- | tion,” declared Mr. Mudd. Who are} they? Charl ‘3 aH of Cafrollton | and John Hanson, two of Maryland’s i most distinguished sons.” Mr. Mudd | meant the two new bronze statues | | Maryland has placed in Statuary hall. An Easy Solution. The duke of Wellington, while a member of the British ministry, once | turned a crawn battle into a glorious | - ef the bloody | victory. When the ne ‘ action of Ferozhubr, in India, arrived | there was at consternation in the} ; at best it. was a drawn bat: | } tle. Robert Peel was much affect- {ed at the council taking a most: view, when the duke, lighting “Make it a victory; fire a ad ring the bells”; and so it} Sanite a | was ordered and done. The Season. “Ah!” sighs the gentle damsel, “see | the bare limbs on the beech. Does | not that bring forcibly to one’s mind the sorrowful fact that summer has gone? How many pleasant recollec ions of the summer such a sight cally ap, don’t you think?” “Well, to tell you the truth,” replied the candfd | | youth, “I have never been or the ; beach in summer. "— Judge. . | Well, Well! Here We Are Again! owe With a pull line of Windows and Doors. We have the most complete line west of Duluth. We also have a large line of Screen Doors and Windows, all sizes. all NA and all prices. We also carry a full ite of Plasterers’ Material, such as Lime, Brick, Tair, Cement and Wali Plaster. Cali on d. d. DECKER, at the Lumber Office, or ’Phone No. 9. | * if SHAE SSERES SASS ED SEAN ONAN ESSERE SSSSORRRRRS See q 1 = = A Favorite Resort » a hments and where may be seen and heard one est phonographs in the world is at JNO. O'REILY’ S Saimple Room The Northern. © Cabinet Rye Whiskey { Rapids. We handle the finest whiskers eve ? NORTHERN CAFE Doc, Welsh, Chef. In connection—open duy and night. served at all hours, 8 John O'Riley, Prop. Ae Ss Se ag a ate ATE NOSES he a a EAD a All deliencies of the season ecsnedeseosesrneessosrasoeceee ae | | fan 2 # HE eS Ee a ak A Se a AE a ae aes seaectattehy ety. ( GEO. BOOTH, a i i i Manufacturer of | h Fine Cigars HH GRAND RAPIDS, J/7NN lave welie ved an excellent reputation all over Northern “BOOTH’S CIGARS” = Minnesota. They are made fl of the finest selected stock by experienced workmen in Mr Booth’s own shops here, and under his personal supervision. 'Phis insures the utmost cleanliness and care in manufacture.* T For sale everywhere. Call for them. beSSSSeseseqeSeseosaeazsess nue Sasasesesesesesesesaqeseseseses z an Ee z ici TRAINS LA-CARTE