Evening Star Newspaper, January 12, 1942, Page 28

WOMEN’S FEATURES. THE EVENING STAR, WASHINGTON, D. C, MONDAY, JANUARY 12, 1942. WOMEN'S FEATURES, B—9 Marriage Must Be Sturdy Enough to Thrive on Inevitable Hard Knocks Too Many Young Couples Think They Will Live in A Lasting Fairyland They Become Disillusioned And Want to Quit When Realities Hit Them By Dorothy Dix One of our distinguished psychologists recently declared that the young people of today have an almost “terrifying desire” for perfect marriages and for the dissolution of their marriages if they are imperfect. This statement explains why more than one-third of the divorces are granted to boys and girls in their early 20s ahd who have only been married a short time. They are still children who believe in fairy stories and who cannot bear finding out that they are only make-believe tales that are not true, and that there is no such thing as a perfect marriage in an imperfect world. Nor are they old enough and wise enough to know that even if there were such a thing as an ideal marriage, they could not endure it any more than they could subsist upon a diet of chocolate creams. For the chief thing that makes marriage interesting is that it is &n unknown terrain that we can spend 40 or 50 years exploring without finding out all of its unexpected heights and depths, or learning to nego- tiate all of its dangerous pitfalls. It is not a flat and level mead that we tire of because of its very sameness. Also, we love people more for their defects than we do for their virtues, and the very fact that we have to forgive their faults and be forgiven by them for ours, draws us: together. Like the heroine in Barrie's play we say “poor soul” to them and they say “poor soul” to us and we are happy together. After all, sinners have not much in common with saints. & e So 1t is pathetic to think of this | terrifying quest of the starry-eyed | youngsters for the perfect marriage | expected to find a perfect marriage and who throw up their hands and quit when they find that they have and their belief that out of all the missed it, do not understand is that millions of men and women Who | S ol 0 re not have gone before them who have | g noRO. 5 DRI e the also hunted for the end of the rain- | gy plants that have struck their bow, that they will find it. They | roots’down in rocky soil and defied look about them and see so MAaNy | the wind and weather to kill them. stolid, middle-aged couples Whose | por husbands and wives are not romance has so long been dead that | houng together by ease and luxury, they have nothing left even t0 say | by by the hardships they endure to each other; they have heard | together, by the battles they have their own parents quarreling every | fought out shoulder to shoulder, by day of their lives, and they say: | the weaknesses they have condoned “This mustn't happen to us. We|in each other. must go through life tralling clouds |,y 41,0 saddest part of the whole of fglor}:. Our marriage must be | tragedy of these boys and girls who P A expect too much of marriage is that And thelr vision of a perfect mar- \ they could still find so much that riage is as artless as a child’s idea | js worth having in it if only they of & party—all ice cream and cake.| would make the best of what they ‘They are to think alike on every sub- | have, instead of throwing the whole ject, to have the same tastes, ambi- tions and desires. There are to be no arguments, no differences of opin- jon. No sickness. No hard times. No pinching economies. No frayed nerves and rasped tempers from | being bawled out by the boss, or hav- ing done a hard day’'s washing. Always the wife will keep her youth and beauty and meet her hus- band of an evening with a glad, sweet smile, with her hair immacu- lately coiffed and wearing pink chif- fon. Always the husband will re- main a great lover. And even the children will be miraculously born past the teething age, with curly hair and angelic dispositions. But life is not like that. And marriage is not like that by a long shot. Even the luckiest of marriages are full of the clashes of tempera- ment between differing personalities, of inevitable disagreements and op- pesite points of view, of work and WO! and trials and tribulations, of sickness and bills and strain and stress that tries the souls of both husbands and wives and makes them wonder at times why they did it. But what these youngsters, who | thing in the scrap heap; because many a marriage could be salvaged by a little patience and forbearance | and common sense. For, while no husband or wife can | ever come up to the romantic ex- | pectations of those seeking a perfect mate, they can develop into good providers and superexcellent cooks. And that is something. Furthermore, divorce doesn't help | to solve the problem of how to make a perfect marriage. For all mar- riages are cut off of the same bolt of cloth and have flaws in them. | Life Sparf of Mattress, | Given a reasonable amount of good care, a mattress will last longer and provide greater comfort. Right care includes regular turning, pro- tection with quilted pads. daily airing, frequent cleaning and pro- tection against rough handling. When a mattress begins to develop lumps or sags, it shouid be replaced, the continued use of misshapen bedding will develop unhealthful sleeping habits. Will Please the By Barbara Bell She loves parties, she loves pretty frocks, and she adores “going places”—she)s our modern “junior miss,” and pattern No. 1534-B was specially designed for her! The princess silhouette sheathes her young, lithe figure gloriously—and the quaint decoration of the eyelet embroidered beading running from shoulder to shoulder appeals to her modern taste for streamline sim- plicity. Indeed, this is a dress made for parties and good times, and every lassie will welcome it into her ward- robe with open arms! Just a few yards of fabric and a bit of sewing persistence are all that is:needed for you to own this dress, plus the aid of our simplified pattern, which gives complete directions for mak- ing it. Right now, with the social whirl at a peak, is the time to have this dress, too. With it you are ready for any date which comes up. It is & dress which will transform the 13 ‘; Ijre;swfo;Pa‘r"ty Wear Attractively Designed Pattern ‘Junior Miss’ BARBARA BELL, ‘Washington Star. Inclose .25 cents for Pattern No. 1534-B. Size (Wrap eolns securely in paper.) sweater-and-skirt girl into a fem- inine figure of romance! Barbara Bell Pattern No. 1534-B is designed for sizes 11, 13, 15, 17 and 19. Corresponding bust meas- urements 29, 31, 33, 35 and 37. Size 13 (31) requires 3% yards 39-inch material, 1 yard eyelet embroidery shirred, 2 yards ribbon. A new fashion book has just been published. It is crammed with ex- citing new ideas for spring sewing! Send 15 cents for your copy today. If the children are tired of the usual “bread-and-butter-and-sugar” snack when they come home from school, try giving them crisp and wholesome “apple sandwiches.” Below you will find several sugges- tions for pllings. Adpvice Given On Unusual Situation Don’t Give Up Girl For Urdeserving Selfish Friend |By Kay Caldwell and Alden Harrson Mike and Ray are two 17-year- |old boys whe are “closer than | brothers,” to us> Mike's own phrase. | Some time ago Ray got & crush on | a girl whom tney both knew well | but who didn’t seem to like Ray. Mike did everything he could to help his frien1 in this situation. He tried to “s2ll” Ray to the girl without succes:. Then he tried to get Ray to forjet her with equally unsatisfactory results. Ray joined the Navy and wrote the girl letter after letter, which she never ac- knowledged. Then Mike began to realize that he liked this virl very much him- self and that she felt the same way about him. science begar to hurt him—he thought he was double crossing his pal. So he pwked fights with the giri, trying to make her angry with thim. But he realized more and more that she and he just seemed to “belong together.” Mike told Rxy what was happen- ing, and Ray asked Mike not to “take the girl away from him,” al- though he had never succeeded in arousing her irterest himself. (Also | he has some seven or eight other girls on his string) Nevertheless, Mike was so coggedly loyal to Ray that he gave the girl a brush-off and hurt her feelings badly. ‘Whereupon ke sat down and wrote to us, asking f he should give the girl up permenently for the sake of his friendship with Ray. or if we thought ke might be able to keep both. Frankly, we don’t know the an- swer to the lstter question. It all depends on hoew good & sport Ray is. But we certainly don’t think that Mike shculd give the girl up for the sake o' his pal. Mike is at the age when he 1s| Just moving ot of the “gang” phase of a boy’s Lfe, when masculine friends mean everything to him. The girl intersst is new, and con- flict between masculine friendship and romance is quite common to fellows at this period. We hope Mike can keep Ray's friendship, be:ause it means a lot to him and secause his romance with this girl may be only a tem- porary thing, as are most teen-age love affairs. Nevertheless, we are definitely against his continuing to be a self-sa‘rificing, big-hearted Eddy for a pal who doesn’t deserve such treatment. Any worth-while friendship must work both wavs. All the elfish- 1mmediately his con- | 1o By Betsy Caswell, Woman's News Editor. re comes a time, just about the middle of winter, when the chil- dren rebel against their usual after- noon meal. When they get home from school they want something interesting—something that is a real surprise, and a “lift,” after the over- worked bread-butter-and-brown-su- gar that was so popular at first. Crisp apple slices may be used to make nowl and delicious sand- wiches, pack-jammed with vitamins and other valuable food elements. If you like, mix several small batches of various fillings, and let the young- sters ask the gang in to “roll their own.” APPLE SANDWICHES. Slice medium-sized apples, but do not peel. Dip in lemon juice and dry on & paper towsl. Spread with the following: 1. Mix 6 tablespoons sharp cheese, 1 tablespoon butter and 3 table- spoons orange juice. Best until smooth. 3. Equal portions of grated cheese, minced celery, finely chopped rais- ins moistened with mayonnaise dressing. 3. Equal parts of cream cheese, :&fly chopped dates and preserved | ger. 4.1 cup cottage cheese and % cup bar-le-duc mixed together. 5.1 cup cottage cheese, 13 cup | finely chopped water cress, 3 table- spoons mayonnaise dressing. 6. Equal parts of Roquefort cheese, cream cheese and pecan meats cut very fine. Serve hot buttered popcorn with these sandwiches, and watch the gang go for this tray. Responsibilities By Josephine Lowman Since the United States of Amer- ica has become engaged in war, I have heard many American wom- en say things similar to the fol- wing: “Believe me, I'm going to put my whole family on a health routine and no procrastinating this time! We may have to pull our belts in before this is over.” Another, “I'm going to get as fit as & fiddle—build up more stamina! I may not be able to afford help with the children and house later » Still another, “I'm going to have my tonsils taken out. I've been told many times that they are poisoning me and I want to get myself into fine physical condition.” Here you have the reaction of the average woman in the average home. Nobody knows just what sacrifices lie ahead. It certainly is true that women on this side of the water may have to give up many of the luxuries to which they have become accustomed. This will be true because prices are rising, taxes will mount and the desire to buy Defense savings bonds grows with the emergency. This is a time when physical stamina of the entire continent, from children to soldiers, is vitally important. Horrible though war is, it has this one happy by-product. It tends to level life to essentials, to simplify it, and to spotlight the old and tried rules of honor and mental and physical stamina which we find in the constitutions of the democracies and in all good books on healttf. ' ‘F Why Grow dld? Build Up Stamina to Meet Added of Times As the cost of butter and taxes crowd the budget, remember this, most of the best things in life are free. Laughter, love, health, sun- light, fresh air and outdoors are there if you will only take them. If you, too, are interested in building up health, in keeping steady nerves in the face of added responsibilities and a tougher, more existence, get outdoors more often. I think there are two factors which keep us from doing this as often as we should. First, we give in to inertia. It seems so much trouble to get ready for a day in the country, or one spent at the beach that we sometimes pass them by to loaf inside. Then, too, we are so busy that it is dificult to work outside activity into our day. The great outdoors is the most potent of all health builders. Take every opportunity to use it. If your climate permits, get a badminton net for your back yard. If not, get & ping pong table, walk to and from work, or plan to take a long tramp in the park every day. A systematic plan of this kind will bring you wonderful results in an increased feeling of well being and greater energy. When you walk, breathe deeply. For the next few days “Why Grow Old?” will bring you instructions as to how you should breathe for maxi- mum health. If you wish to have my leaflet about breathing exercises, send a 3-cent-stamped, self-addressed envelope with your request to Josephine Lowman in care of ‘The Evening Star. ness and consderation cafl't be on one side. Ray has seven or eight girls on his st-ing, and this girl has refused to giv> him even the ghost of a tumble. Yet he has the colos- sal nerve anc the blind selfishness to try to keep Mike from going with her! By taking that position we think he ha: shown himself un- worthy of Mixe’s friendship. As often hadpens in matters such as this, the cerson who has been taking the real beating is the girl, a wholly innccent party. She cer- tainly can’t ke blamed for not lik- ing Ray, anc she doesn't deserve to suffer for her attitude toward him by hawng Mike treat her shabbily. We think Mike should start im- mediately to make amends to the girl for the way he has treated her in the past. And he should explain to Ray exacily what he is doing, pointing out <hat since Ray has no chance with the girl, anyway, he has no cause for complaint. Then it will be up to Ray to prove that he’s a real frirnd by-saying heartily and sincerely: “Okay, chum. Go to it!” If that hapoens the girl may later accept Ray ss Mike’s friend, even if she has n» romantic” interest in him. Then everybody should be happy all arund. But if Ray is resentful and Mike loses his friend- ship it will te too bad. However, we &'on‘t thizk Mike will have lost mul | bathroom as needed, and so that| | beauty is lost if the nap is crushed | the absorbency as well. Distinctive Centerpiece By Baroness Piantoni Ten pie-like segments of filet crochet worked together make this handsortie centerpiece. Clusters of grapes and an unusual arrangement of graceful leaves achieve & distinctive effect. The finished design &m‘mnmmmm,-ml;h?-mmnmmum room table or the top of your e. Send 15 cents for pattern No. 1589 to the Needlework Editor of The 3 - Shake Bath Towels To Restore Fluff Big cuddly bath towels are the housewife’s pride. Soft and absorb- ent, they give the final touch of luxury to the bath or shower. They come in many sizes, colors and weights to accommodate all tastes. These are important factors but it is equally important that there be | enough towels in the linen closet so that clean ones can be hung in the each member of the family may have | his own. Good housekeepers know how to restore the fleeciness of the toweling after laundering. Much of the | down in hard wads, and some of | The trick lies in one little gesture. After the | towels have been washed and rinsed and hung on the line, take hold of the two free corners. Shake each towel with a right good will. The thread loops will spring away from the towel body and will dry soft instead of matted. Do not iron, as this presses the loops back | down again. The hems may be pressed lightly if desired. Delicious Flavor Grated lemon and orange rinds, soaked 10 minutes in a little of the| Old-Age Health Security Is Strongly Built When Proper Diets Are Used Following Outline Gives Important Points for Selection of Meals By Bureas of Home Ecomomics, Uwited States Depertment of Agriculture Thrifty folk, if they can, arrange i lay a little money aside for old-. sge financial security. Similarly, over a period of years, we can do much to build for old-age health security. Good health habits, like good thrift habits, should start early. Especially is this true of one of the most important of all health- habits—that of eating & good diet. Present-day nutrition, it has been said, offers an extra 10 years to the life of any one who lives under its guidance. According to Dr. Henry Sherman, one of the country’s nutritionists, these extra years probably can be added to life at its prime—thus postponing the effects of advancing old age. Poor diets, on the other hand, may make a person old before his time. Inadequate diets year after year naturally take their toll in chronis fatigue, shifting aches and pains and certain kinds of digestive trouble. They lower natural resistance to infection and destroy a person’s senss of well being—his joy in being alive, In some ways, & good diet for an older person differs frgn s good diet for a younger person. In the following paragraphs, home economists of the United States Department of Agriculture outline the importans points for normal, elderly people to cogsider in selecting their daily meals. As far as we know now, there are three main things to keep in mind. Pirst, an older person needs fewer¢——— — — — calories than he did When he was | 5alad greens. Have them - younger. Second, though his calories | Dot long before serving—very fine, | diet—milk, are reduced, his need for minerals and vitamins remains much the same. Third, food for older per- sons may need to be easier to chew and easier to digest. Older persons need fewer calories because they use less energy. Many of their body mechanisms are slowed down. They do not work so hard or play so0 actively. For instance, a man who at 30 was moderately ac- tive and needed about 3,000 calories & day to keep him going, might need only 2,400 or less at 60. Easiest way to tell, of course, whether too much food energy is being taken is to watch the scales. Eating too much brings on over- weight, overweight increase with age. Ex- cessive body fat is & burden on the heart, may help cause some dis- eases and lessen a person’s chances to recover from certain diseases. Best way to cut down on calories is to go slow on foods that supply little else than energy—rich des- serts, pastries, many of the fats and rich dressings. At the same time, the amount of minerals and vita- mins must not be reduced. There- fore, there must continue to be plenty of protective foods in the fruit and vegetables, some foods rich in viatmin Bl and does not get out in the sun much. Above all, food must be easy to eat and easy to digest. Following are some suggestions along this line in the form of a daily checklist. MILK—2 to 3 cups & day. Milk is an excellent source of calcium as well as a number of other food values. It doesn’t matter how you |old age and still don’t like. to.drink |it, eat 1t in custards, soups, and other cooked dishes. TOMATOES, ORANGES, GRAPEFRUIT, GREEN CABBAGE, SALAD GREENS—One serving or more & day. These foods are good for vitamin C. Since much vitamin C may be destroyed by cooking you get the most from these foods if you eat them uncooked. If you can't eat much raw fruit, you can get vitamin C in the juice of oranges, grapefruit and tomatoes. And if fruit juice, give a delicious flavor to sugar or fruit cookies. you find raw vegetables hard to handle, eat only the very tender THE MAN And the disadvantages of | some with vitamin D if a penon\ take milk. If you've lived to & npe‘ 30 they are easier to eat. 3 LEAFY, GREEN OR YELLLOW, VEGETABLES — One serving or more & day for their vitamin A. Vitamin A isn't destroyed in cook- ing to any large extent. Any of these) vegetables will be easier to eat if they are cooked. Maybe you'll even want them chopped up fine, or sieved and served in purees, soups and such dishes. OTHER VEGETABLES OR PRUTT —Two or more servings; look them over and take your choice. Potatoss probably will be one. They are an- inexpensive source of importart food values. Try to get as much variety as you can. Most vegetables will be: easier to eat if they are eooked: until tender, easier to digest if they are served plainly. EGGS—Eggs are valuable for iron and high quality protein as well as certain vitamins. Get one a day or at least three or four a week. Soft- cooked eggs are easiest to eat, of course. LEAN MEAT, POULTRY, FISH— There's no general rule as to how much meat an older person should eat. Whether you cut down or not depends upon how much meat you have been eating. But instead of steaks and roasts you may find fine- ly chopped meats and poultry and easily flaked fish easier to handle. CEREALS AND BREAD—One or two servings of whole-grain cereal | products. Eat white bread in the | “enriched” form. Food calories, vi- | tamin Bl, and iron are the three notable contributions of whole-grain | or enriched products. Whole-grain products also contain the other members of the vitamin B compiex. | FATS—Cut down on rich fat mixtures, Fat takes longer than |any other food to digest. S0 as | you get older and your digestive processes slow down anyway, a lot of fat simply puts an added burden on your stomach and lower digestive tract. Some fats, of course, are still needed in the diet for the essen- tial fatty acids they contain. Bute ter and cream are natural sources of | vitamin A. Certain other table fats may have vitamin A added to them. SWEETS — Eat only enough sweets to make your diet palatable, especially if you are inclined to gain weight. If not, eat sweets in mod- eration to satisfy your appetite and add ealories. WHO CAME TO DINNER Admired Her Manbattan-Laundered Linens Naturally! 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