Evening Star Newspaper, January 5, 1942, Page 34

WOMEN’'S FEATURES. \¢ THE EVENING § WASHINGTON, D. C, MONDAY, JANUARY 5, 1942, TAR, WOMEN'S FEATURES. B—11 Parents Should Prepare Their Youngsters to Meet thé World'S’Hardships Don’t Coddle Them So Much That They Cannot Battle - Problems That Arise Slaving for Children Mistake; Pampering Often Cultivates Loafers and Weaklings . By Dorothy Dix Probably all parents would satin-line and soft-pad the world for their ehildren if they could, but in trying to do this they bring upon their coddled darlings greater hardships than the ones from which they are trying to protect them. For life isn't a pathway strewn with roses. It is & hard and rocky road to travel. There is no possible way in which we can save those we love from being pierced by its thorns and bruised by its stones, and the softer we make our children the less able they are to endure the sufferings that they are going to be called upon to bear, and the more danger there is of their fainting and falling by the wayside. Do what we will we cannot stand between our youngsters and mis- fortune. We can only fit them as best we can to meet it. This is a sad and tragic fact that parents only too often ignore, and it gives us the pitiful spectacle we see on every hand of fathers and mothers working themselves to death preparing a future of misery for the children they worship, and doing them a greater harm than malice itself could invent. For what these parents forget is that nothing they can do can alter the world in which their children must live that will make it safe and secure for them. No effort of theirs can save the chilaren from reaping as they sow. No sacrie fice that they make can prevent their children from having to pay their gcore in life. In the end their chil- ¢ dren must work out their own des- tiny. Nothing is more common than to hear a successful, self-made man say: “I came up the hard way, but, thank God, my children will never have to struggle as I have.” Or a mother will say: “I don’t want my girls to have to work and be denied pretty clothes and good times as I was when I was young. I want them to be carefree and able to go about f and enjoy themselves.” Or you hear parents say: “Our parents were do- | mestic tyrants who ruled us with a rod of iron. We had no personal lib- erty. No indulgences. And we wouldn’t have dared not to be home by 11 o'clock at night. We have given our children the right to lead their own lives and denied them nothing that they wanted that we could possibly afford.” And so we have the parents who work their fingers to the bones so that their children may loaf; who go shabby so that their children may have the smartest new thing in sportswear; medical care that might save their lives to send their children to swanky colleges. Father walks so that son may dash around at 75 miles an hour in a high-powered, streamlined roadster. Mother cooks and washes and makes calluses on her hands so that daughter’s red fingernails may never have any con- tact with housework. And the parents are happy in making slaves of themselves for " | their children because they believe that they are securing their chil- dren’s future well-being. They never doubt that sending a boy to college will automatically make him Pres- who go without the | ident or chief of staff of the Army, or at the least a millionaire; and that if they keep their girls dressed up like clothes-horses they will make brilllant marriages. And they ap- parently never suspect that if they leave them fortunes that they can never lose them. Yet we are all daily witnesses to the futility of parents trying to protect their children instead of teaching them how to protect them- selves. We have seen the fortunes piled up by one generation wasted by the next, and their children beg- ging their bread. We have seen the weak trampled under foot by the strong. The spoiled and pampered children who never grew up get- | | wives who wouldn't coddle them as mother did, but expected them to be adults and act like adults instead of howling babies. And it makes one wonder why parents so seldom realize that the very hardships they have gone through are what made them the successes they are. ey had to work, and they learned habits of industry. They had to count their pennies, and it made them thrifty. They sat at the bottom of the lad- der and looked up at the top, and it fired them with the ambition to climb. They had to fight for all they wanted in life, and it taught them how to win out. And we wonder still more that parents do not teach their children what the world is really like, what they will have to learn to do and take in order to hold their own in it ‘mstend of leading them to believe that somehow they will drift through it on flowery beds of ease. Boy Should Plan Dates Being Considerate of Girl in This Case Often Becomes Weakness By Kay Caldwell and Alden Harrison A young fellow convalescing in a hospital recently wrote us a very amusing letter, attempting to prove that our advice to treat girls with thoughtfulness and consideration wa: s the bunk. This boy claimed that he used to be a perfect gentleman, and the girls would have none of him. 80 then he became a first-class heel, and the fickle females promptly fell all over him. We didn't take the letter very seriously, because it was obviously at | least half fiction, written for fun by$— ————————————— a fellow with a lot of time on his hands. Nevertheless, there was a kernel of truth beneath the moun- tain of chaff, and here it is: If a fellow carries consideration to the point of becoming weak and wishy- washy, no feminine hearts will flut- ter at his approach. A good example of this virtue turned into a fault appears in the following letter from 8. M.: “Should a boy call a girl and ask for a date, and mlake her decide | where they should go? I have a friend whom I date quite often and who always does this. This makes it hard for me, because I don't know | what to suggest, and we usually end up at the movies. “My other friends pick out some place and then call and ask me if he wants to do whateve ant to go. But this boy just says want to do. We have been friends Yor a long time, and we've always argued over | this point. I want to be sure I am doing right in insisting hereafter | that he choose.” Certainly youre doing right in making him choose, S. M. It's the boy’s duty to have a definite pro- gram in mind when he asks for a date. In letting you choose, he may think he is being considerate, but we have a hunch he's just being lazy. He doesn't want to bother to figure something out for himself, so e leaves it up to you. Of course, if a fellow and girl aré seeing a lot of each other, the boy can hardly be expected to suggest some new and exciting place to go every time they have a date. But he certainly shouldn't always leave the entire responsibility of choosing the evening's entertainment to the girl. | The ideal course here is for him to make a suggestion or two and then ask her for her ideas. After that they can reach a decision together. Every girl likes to be treated with | consideration, but no girl admires a boy who is weak-willed, undecided and indefinite. Oh, she may take advantage of him, just as many a nagging wife takes advantage of a too easygoing husband. But she will neither admire nor respect him. Most girls want a boy to take the initiative in their dealings with him. It's feminine human nature to let the man lead, and even when a girl is striving her hardest to ‘boss” a boy, she is instinctively and uncon- sciously hoping that he’ll turn the ;:hles and show his ability to boss er. The kind of consideration that a girl wants doesn't spring from mas- culine weakness, but from masculine strength. It isn't shown because the boy is afraid of the girl, or because he wants her to take the lead or make the decisions. It's shown be- cause the boy likes the girl and wants to make her comfortable and happy. Doggy Chair Back Set By Baroness Piantoni ting divorces from the husbands and | o . i There are several approved so well on your breakfast toast. “Orange” is an adjective which| when used in this sense just nat- urally modifies marmelade. If you like to make your own, this is the season when you can do it to ad- vantage. There are several methods which | may be used. One of these is very| easy and results are good, but your marmalade will not look quite so| attractive in the glasses as when| the method which demands that| the fruit rind be cut into thin strips is used. Because our oranges do not have the pungent flavor of the Seville oranges, which are commonly used in England for marmalade, the home product will be milder in| flavor. If you like the tang, you| may combine grapefruit, oranges| and lemons. In cooking your fruit and sugar together, the mixture must be stir- red until the sugar is dissolved and | then frequently as the sirup thick-| ens. Overcooking produces a dark| marmalade and a slightly caramel- ized flavor, which, however, some people really like. You must take care, however, not to let the mixture i i methods for making the delicious orange marmalade that goes Sliced grapefruit and lemons may be added to give a “tangy touch,” or the recipe may be prepared more simply if a milder flavor is desired. burn. The use of & heavy kettle will help to prevent this. Marmalade may be packed in either glasses or jars. The glasses must be covered with paraffin, while this may be omitted if your jars are| tightly covered. Always let the utes. Measure the mixture and add marmalade cool slightly before put-|an equal amount of sugar. Bring ting it into the containers in order|to boiling, stirring constantly until thet the fruit will not float and water and boil until tender. Drain. Slice fruit very thin, removing seeds. Measure drained rind and fruit into large kettle ,add twice the amount of water and the salt. Bring to boiling and cook 25 min- will be evenly distributed. A quick method which gives ex- cellent results when followed accu- rately is as follows: ORANGE MALMALADE, No. 1. (Makes 12-18 glasses.) Slice 4 medium or 3 large, un- peeled oranges and 4 unpeeled lem- ons very thin. Measure and add 5 times as much cold water. Boil hard for 50 to 60 minutes. This should reduce quantity to one-half. Meas- ure into 2 or 3 cup lots. For rather sweet oranges, add edditional lemon juice at this stage—about 1 table- spoonful to 1 cup fruit. Bring to boiling point. Boil 8 minutes. 3, cup sugar for 1 cup fruit. Boil rapidly until it gives jelly test of | thick, reluctant drops from side of Women Walk In Front at Reception Men Are Allowed To Lead Them On Occasion By Emily Post There are several occasions when it is not only permissible, but pref- erable, for a gentleman to walk ahead of a lady whom he is accom- panying; but when they go down a receiving line, is not one of these. This is an answer to a wife who ex- plains that she is a stranger to those receiving, whereas her husband is well known to them and could there- fore more easily introduce her if he were to walk ahead. I'm afraid this behavior on his part would not be| clearly enough understood to ex- cuse his apparent lack of courtesy. As a matter of fact, it should be quite easy for them to walk side by side since it is not likely that there will be a crowd in front of the re- celving line. Having just mentioned “several occasions” I perhaps should add that & man precedes a woman when look- ing for seats in the pitch blackness of a moving picture theater, when making their way through a public crowd, or going down steep steps, or wherever the footing may be treacherous. Dear Mrs. Post: When a clergy- man comes to call on a new woman parishoner is it permissible for her to offer him a cigarette when she does not know whether he smokes? And if he doesn’t smoke, may she smoke anyway? Answer—Not knowing whether he does smoke, I think it would be best not to offer him any, and in this case certainly best not to smoke her- self. A great many clergymen strongly object to smoking—particu- larly by women. And it hardly would be asking too much of any woman to do without a te rather than to do something -that could be considered as showing lack of respect for his cloth. Dear Mrs, Post: Would it be per- missible to have a brother who is only 18, give his sister in marriage? Some of our friends argue that he is too young. Answer—TI have several times seen a young boy of that age walk up the aisle with his mother, or his sister, and also give her in marriage. These occasions were in the Episcopal Church and I can’t answer for any other denomination; and therefore I would suggest that you ask your clergyman whether this may be per- mitted in your church. A pert little terrier ready for play makes this charming Perhaps you have a new Christmas chair that you want to protect or #ld one that needs refurbishing. Embroider this cross-stitch puppy wi Daisy flowers on linen or crash, buttonhole stitch the edges and you' Lazy be delighted with the results. Send 15 cents for above pattern No. 1734 to the Needlework Edif 8 The Evening Star. Rubber Rings Always buy new rubber rings for spoon—15 to 25 minutes. Pour into sterilized glasses. Cover with paraf- fin when cold. ORANGE MARMALADE, No. 2. 4 medium-sized oranges. 4 medium-sized lemons. 15 teaspoon salt. Sugar., ‘Wash and peel fruit and cut rind into thin strips with scissors. Cover rind with large amount of cold Add | sugar is dissolved. Boil 15 to 25 minutes, or until jelly test is reached. Allow marmalade to cool slightly, stir, and pour into hot sterilized jars or glasses. Seal immediately. Yield, about five pints. CITRUS MARMALADE. 1 large grapefruit. 1 large orange. 1 large lemon. Water. Sugar. 13 teaspoon salt. ‘Wash and peel fruit and cut rind into thin strips with scissors. Cover rind with 1 quart water and boil § | minutes. Repeat this process three times and drain rind. Cut fruit into thin slices, remove seeds and grape- fruit core. Add p to drained peel, and measure. "Add twice the quantity of water and boil rapidly 40 minutes. Measure this mixture and add an equal amount of sugar and the salt. Stir over high heat until sugar is dissolved and cook about 25 minutes until marmalade is thick and clear, stirring frequently; to prevent burning. Allow mixture to cool slightly, stir, and pour into hot sterilized jars or glasses. Seal immediately. Yield, three pints, ' Smart Waist: coat Dress This Design of Welcome Variety Has Many Flattering Tricks S ° By Barbara Bell Inspired by the waistcoats of long ago, Pattern No. 1527-B presents a dress design of welcome variety. Well modified for the feminine figure this dress has many flattering tricks—the bodice sections, for instance which emphasize the bosom line, the vestee section which gives the dress chis- eled slimness through the waist, the rolled collar which frames the V- pointed neckline so neatly! You'll greatly enjoy making & dress which has all of these unusual jars when putting up foods. Good | achool ld stretch to twice ) - designed for sizes 13, 14, 16, 18 and bust 20. Corresponding measure- ments 30, 32, 34, 36 and 38. Size 14 (32), short sleeves, requires 5 yards 39-inch A new Fashion Book has just been published. It is' crammed with ex- citing new ideas for spring sewing! i’!end 18 cents for your copy today! Spoiled Baby Is a Young Dictator Parents to Blame If Child Rules Family Life By Lettice Lee Streett Perhaps it does not seem possible that the newcomer to your house, who may still be very new, is capa- ble of ruling his home and family with his fron-clad baby fist, but it is lamentably true. Just look at him, so tiny and pink, snoozing on his tummy; he is absolutely precious and especially wonderful to own! But that innocently sleeping babe can make your life miserable if you allow him, and he can be the most horrid infant tyrant if you permit him to have his way. You cannot blame him; he is simply acting as all young animals do. The only person you can blame is yourself, if your baby is spoiled. ‘There is no excuse for a healthy, normal baby to be spoiled. None. ‘Those are brave words, easier to speak than to practice, but they are nevertheless a positive fact. ‘When the new baby arrives home from the hospital with his mother, the seeds of future trouble may be sown right then and there if he is catered to according to his whims instead of his rightful needs. If he is picked up, rocked and petted every time he starts to cry (after all, he is supposed to cry sometime s0 that he will take his daily ex- ercise), if he is fed very much off schedule, and if instead of giving Plan During Coming Year To Alter Completely Your Appearance Lose Excess Weight, Improve Your Complexion and Build More Exuberant Health By Josephine Lowman ‘Another 12 months have just whizzed by with the and here we sit staring into 1942 with the same dre: o8 plans we had at the beginning of 1941, many of which we failed to mak: come true. It seems only yesterday that we dated our first check 1941. We failed to do many things we meant to do last year. Perhaps you had planned to lose some excess weight, or some lumps which were giving your silhouette a matronly appearance, or to work on your complexion with regular care, or see if you couldn't remedy the lifeless look of your hair by constant massage, or to get a new hair do, or build more exuber- ant health and lose fatigue. Then the days hurtled through your consclousness with such agility that before you realized it they had piled into weeks and months an year. You saw your dreams buried under a mass of the petty dc - living, and your grand plans went down under the weight of hu strain and unending demands. Well, it’s nice to know that we hav~ chunk of life dumped into our minds and hearts and hands. All women want to be lovely. The only women who are not inter- ested in becoming more attractive and more youthful are those who feel that there 1s no hope of dding so or those who don’t know how to begin. ‘Then there are thousands more who know it can be done, who have seen the startling changes in friends who¢—————————————— speed of A ams, wishe 2+ <ther know what to do but procrastinate about beginning. Not every woman can be beautiful —but every woman can be attractive. If you have neglected yourself for 30 many years that you feel re- | habilitation to beauty and youth is | impossible for you, don't let that | deter you from doing as much as you can. ‘That would be like collapsing in a dreary cottage while you dream of owning a castle when you could be planting flowers about the door, | painting the furniture or making a rag rug to put in front of the fire- him a chance to become accustomed to the everyday sounds in his home his family tiptoe around and make perfect idiots of themselves shush- ing everybody when they are near him, he will soon demand, in fact, he will command you to obey him. ‘What else do you expect? This does not- mean that if an infant is upset nervously or physical- ly that he should be left to cry him- self into a fretful sleep. However, a sensible mother knows whether her baby is truly miserable or sim- ply spoiled. But care must be taken ill child should not be held. The his arm or back, will be sufficient at- tention. A baby as young as 8 months may be encouraged by over-proud and over-solicitious parents to develop into a showoff. The controlled, level-headed mother can love her child just as much and more than does the mother who makes a great scene of cooing over and kissing her infant and allowing him to be the center of attention with admir- ing friends and family. Purther than this, the former is serving her child the more wisely of the two. A baby should not be allowed to feel that he is the most important person in the room, for, after all, the room is the world to him. If he thinks this, he will soon become an overbearing young tyrant, will expect all conversation to cease while he is present and he will also be made tired and nervous by such silly goings on. Babies are not miracles, they are human beings. Of course, they are precious and important, but the overdoting mother who lets her child believe that he is the hub of the universe is very likely to raise a youngster who will later prove to be a serious problem. Manners of the Moment ‘The salesladies tell me they get awfully mad at women who take off wrong side out all the dresses they try on. Of course, this works two ways. Sometimes the women buying dresses get awfully mad at the sales- ladies for skipping out on them just as they reach the hooks and eyes in the middle of the back. Peeling dresses off so that they are wrong side out is somehow easier than peeling dresses off any other way. But it is harder to straighten out the dress afterward. Conse- quently, most women go on the theory that when there is some one else to pick up and hang the dresses, they may as well do it the easy way. But when they have to pick up after themselves, they are more careful. But I'm willing to make & bar- gain with the saleslady. If shell stick around when I need help get- ting in and out of the blamed things, I'll take the dresses off right side out. But I'll warn her that if she doesn’t help me when I need help she not only gets the dress ence whether the evening is formal or not. Lace even goes to her head as sh dons her saucy little hat to match the black Chantilly dress with of white marquisette. Lace takes to her fingers in form of dainty little mitts or gloves. You shauld gowns to an send | place! | Let me tell you this! Lots more can be done than you realize, even | after years of neglect. A loss of extra poundage, improved posture, & new hair dress, an increased bust measurement, a clearer skin, and renewed health and vitality can sports, have, in fact, damaged your enjoyment in living and added an extra strain to your health, do some- thng about it during this new year. Here's a hip exercise whch is easy. Sit on the floor with the legs out in front of you. Lean back on the hands, elbows straight. Move for- ward on the hips. Rock from side to side, lifting the left hand from the floor as you rock to the right and the right hand as you rock to the left. Knees are kept comparatively straight, bending only slightly. If you wish to lose 20 pounds in eight weeks’ time send a 3- cent stamped, self-addressed en- velope with your request for the leaflet “General Reducing Rou- tine,” which outlines diet and exercise, addressed to Josephine Lowman in care of this news- paper. not to further upset a sick or ailing | baby by rocking him, and a very | presence of his mother by his crib, | perhaps the touch of her hand on| make you look, as well as feel, like & brand-new person. A few changes | ‘of this sort will take years off of iyour age and add up to a lovely | woman. | At this time each year “Why Grow | Old?” offers you its “Eight Weeks, Self-Improvement, Marathon.” Each year thousands of women join. It's; simply this: At this time I offer| you personal advice about your problems, I prescribe for you, then | you put that advice into practice for eight weeks. We see who can improve most in that length of time. | The stories of the winners will be published in this column later on| | but your names will not be used | | unless you wish. | I chose eight weeks as the length | of time it should run because that is long enough to bring you startling | results in increased attractiveness and is short enough to seem possible I can promise you a loss of 20| | pounds in that time, if you wish it, | or can assure that you can remold | | your figure to ideal proportions with | & noticeable improvement in skin (and hair and pep. I can promise | | you that friends will tell you that | you look younger and will ask you | wtlll:t you have been doing to your- self. No long, drawn-out, dreary affair with hopes of possible results within a year, but great improvement in just eight weeks’ time! My general reducing routine includes diet and | exercise and is scientifically plan- | ned to protect your health. Overweight is dangerous for the middle-aged woman. If too many | pounds have been making you feel and look older, have made you tired | and - discouraged about buying | 3Q¢ a jar clothes, have made you timid in NiGHT COUGHS Distress of Colds, Get Relief lmmvsn Vicks Way Nagging, s! Oven Doors Continual opening of the gas or electric oven door changes the tem- perature and is sald to be one of the most common causes of baking disappointments, New wedirarm Cream Deodorant safely Stops Perspiration Institute of Leundering fot being harmless to fabrics. At all stores sellt (alse in 10¢ lagging, ing coughs, maddening throat tickle and irri- tation, mouth breathing—relieve such discomforts from a cold the improved Vicks way. This treatment takes only 3 minutes . . . and makes good old time-tested Vicks VapoRub give EVEN BETTER RESULTS THAN EVER BEFOREL........AS YOU'LL DISCOVER, this more thorough treatment works for hours—eases cwghmg;::odu throat irritation— makes ing a lot easier—and helps bring comfort. 'F; get this improved Vicks treat- ment—with all its benefits—massage VapoRub for 3 minutes on the BACK as well lspnhthrolt and chest, then spread a thick layer For B » on the chest and throatandcoverup. The impreved Way = WCTS 2 Wary to 0."§ ‘bronchial tubeswith soothing medicinal vapors. STIMULATES chestand 'l back surfaces likes f warming poultice. -’ =70 SRING Do this—tonight— at bedtime. Then enjoy the results! FOR AIR-RAID EMERGENCY! USE STERNO CANNED EEAT for heat- ing and cooking. Be prepared for emergencies .if gas and electricity should be cut off. Use for heating water, baby’s milk,’ making coffee, tea, etd Invaluable for sterilization purposes. Be prepared. Get a Sterno stove and a supply of Sterno Canned Heat. Buy Sterno by the dozen. For sale at department, hard- - - ware, drug and S and 10f stores. STERNO CANNED HEAT